Tag Archives: horror

Gross Movie Reviews #493

0
Posted on by

Gross Movie Reviews #493

 

Smoke and Mirrors: The Story of Tom Savini (Shudder) – Being a huge Savini fan since I was a kid this was huge. I remembered the really cool “Scream Greats” doc from Fango in the 80s so see his life story in full talked about it was a wonderful treat. With this documentary you get everything from his inspiration to the untimely death of his brother to why he did not go to L.A. with famous names we know. For me it also connected some stories I have always heard from filmmaker friends and artists and have read about in the past. Like him or dislike him I have always respected him because he was doing something that was completely amazing and without him I do not believe we have some of the cool talented make-up and effects people now. Horror fans if you didn’t like Savini before you will after this as you get finally get the full understanding and first complete look behind the curtain of Savini’s life. This gets 4 stars all the way as Savini will always be someone I have looked up too then and now.

 

Ready or Not (DVD) – Grace is a bride about to be married into a super-rich family who for over a century has sold board games and such. As family tradition after the marriage the family gets together at midnight to initiate the new family member with a game that is picked by the luck of the draw. Problem arises when Grace pulls the ‘Hide-n-Seek’ card that has her being hunted down by the family throughout the huge mansion to be caught before dawn. Weird and sometimes funny shit but well worth the watch. I may not be as big of a fan as most of this past year’s flick but there is denying Samara Weaving is a freaking awesome actress as I give the film 3 stars.

 

Zombieland: Double Tap (On Demand) – Best way to describe this film is if you see the first film you have seen this sequel. That isn’t a bad it is still hilarious zombie killings and rules going on but ten years later. Believe me I will take a sequel like this than most zombie shit that is being force fed to horror fans as I give it 3 stars.

 

From Hell to the Wild West (On Demand) – Found another flick with bootleg Chuck Bronson. This time around a researcher finds a diary from a woman that may have solved the mystery behind Jack the Ripper? She reads the diary that tells a story about the old west at the time Jack the Ripper had disappeared from authorities. A masked psycho is putting out ads for whores to come to a small remote town for them to be killed. Bootleg Chuck figures this out but some bounty hunters believe it’s him. With the help of a U.S. Marshal he hopes to clear his name and bring this unholy killer to justice. The film isn’t a bad concept but making bootleg Chuck Bronson only a supporting character instead of the star I believe hurts the film. That and the film just seeming to drag a little in the middle so I came out a little disappointed in the end as I give this western/horror 1 ½ stars.

 

Satanic Panic (DVD) – First let me just say without Hayley Griffith as Sam the main character I do not know if this movie is much fun as it is? Sam is a young pizza delivery girl trying to make some money. So an order comes in from a rich part of town that is out of the pizza place’s area Sam takes it. Running out of gas and no tip Sam takes it upon herself to find a way into the mansion to explain why she should get a tip. Without knowing at first she has stumbled upon Satanists who are having a meeting and then set up for a ritual when they figure out Sam is a virgin! Funny shit ensues, lots of gore, and a crazy ass Satanist orgy at the end of the film and you got ‘Satanic Panic’ as I give it 3 stars.

 

Crime Zone (DVD) – An absolute gem starring David Carradine and Sherilyn Fenn in a post-apocalyptic world where ‘the state’ controls everything. Fenn and her new boyfriend are made an offer they cannot refuse in order to escape the hell they are in and that is to become the futuristic Bonnie and Clyde. But a double crossing Carradine believes it is all about business and crime stirs up business with a very depressing ending for the two lovers. A fun Corman low budget gem that reminds you how fucking cool Ms. Fenn is. Not only is she gorgeous but talented and did every little project that came her way during the mid to late 80s and I am thankful for that as this gem gets 3 stars.

 

Conversation with the Devil (YouTube) – A new short film from filmmaker Sam Hodge that deals with a man who is about to commit the ultimate sin but stopped when a stranger walks by to strike up a conversation. An interesting and cool little story that has been told in many forms but Mr. Hodge showing he is learning more and more with each independent project he does as I give it 3 out of 4 stars.

 

Cannibal Hillbillies (DVD) – Broaden Torture Productions is back with their latest project that has a small group of friends testing a theory of an urban legend. The urban legend is a family of cannibals living out in the woods where one of their fathers’ had a campsite. They pay with their lives finding this out of course but the biggest problem is watching this 50 minute feature that is filled up with about 10 to 15 minutes of filler. You know empty woods, credits, even the group babbling in the mini-van which seems like forever. I like the people behind this Indy production company but this film just misses on all cylinders badly as I give it 0 out of 4 stars.

 

Strange Events (DVD) – I wouldn’t call it an anthology as much as a series of short films that are about the unknown and paranormal with dates and cities stamped on them. There is no wrap around which makes it unique and fun. We also get some cool backstabbing murders and I did enjoy bootleg Beavis and Butthead stumbling upon the exorcism that they thought was an internet sex date. Worth the watch as I give it 3 stars and if you like it there is a sequel also.

Do Not Disturb (DVD) – A 2010 serial killer film that was also known as “New Terminal Hotel”. Supposedly it is known for having one of the last performances from Corey Haim? But anyway the film centers around a character named Don Malek played by Stephen Geoffreys who was the hot Hollywood screenwriter who now is living in a shitty hotel working on his latest project. Problem arises when his agent Ava played by Tiffany Shepis shows up and sees the studio boss lying in the tub as Malek explains away it is ‘performance art’. Meanwhile all Ava wants is a script from her hot talent that is going cold quickly. Ava returns the next day to find no script but the studio head stumbling out of the bathroom of the hotel room after being dissected by Malek. Now any normal person would run and call the cops but Ava being the best agent possible decides to try and help Malek as she slowly takes the jump down the disturbing rabbit hole with Malek as he transforms into a serial killer. Ava must protect her investment but the biggest flaw of the film might be its ending as it felt very dissatisfying. It’s a fun slow burn with not a great payoff but is better than it should be with great performances from Stephen Geoffreys and Tiffany Shepis as I give it 2 stars.

 

Big Bad Bugs (DVD) – SyFy Channel in its heyday couldn’t come up with something this terrible as a scientist figures out how to use a wormhole to make giant man-eating insects to conquer the world. The topper is when the villain changes into a huge snake! Wasn’t this supposed to be about bugs? The title says it all remember people… as I give this zero stars.

 

Cyborg X (DVD) – There was no JCVD in sight but a hilarious role for Danny Trejo shooting CGI machines and cyborgs as he collects another paycheck waiting for the next “Machete” movie. Instead of even trying to explain this picture just imagine a bootleg of a bootleg “Terminator: Salvation” without all the convoluted John Connor storyline. I give it 1 star and consider yourself warned.

Megaconda (DVD) – A giant CGI monster movie that has eluded me for the past year or two as I went searching for this turkey. Some jagoff comes into small town Colorado fucking up some beloved community park to build condos or something. Instead the workers disturb a sleeping prehistoric snake that is pissed and hungry. Now it is up to a drunk, an emotionless sheriff, his son and girlfriend, and wait for it… Michelle Bauer who just happens to show up while camping in a cave doing artwork and supplying liquor to minors! You had me watching at terrible giant CGI snake and very random appearance of the absolutely cool Michelle Bauer. Instead of being stupid and horrible like “Big Bad Bugs” Fred Olen Ray’s son knows what to do with nothing and make it entertaining as I give it 2 ½ stars.

 

Retrograde (DVD) – Freakin’ Dolph Lundgren is a time traveler who travels 200 years in the past to stop a plague happening from fallen meteors that start the apocalypse. His good looks and fighting skills in movies make it hard to pass up. But felt like the film missed out an opportunity since it also starred Gary Daniels. For that I only give this 2004 Dolph flick 1 ½ stars.

 

The Minion (DVD) – Dolph is a part of the ‘Knights Templar’ who is sent to New York City to retrieve a key that has been unearthed by subway construction. An archaeologist is called in and she is going bonkers on what this can mean for her career. But evil is around and wants to use the key to unlock a secret door that has Satan trapped in a pit. If it is opened evil will reign and lay waste to Earth. A fun ‘End of Days’ made on the cheap with Dolph punching humans in the back of the necks with a glove with spikes to kill off the possessed. If you are a fan of religious ‘End of Days’ shit this will be right up your alley as I give it 2 stars.

 

Any comments please send to grossmoviereview@verizon.net or www.facebook.com/grossmoviereviews . Remember folks always support your local independent movie theater, independent video store, and independent filmmakers! It will keep horror alive………

Don’t forget you can also hear Kyle Poling, John Shatzer, and me talking about horror flicks on the Bloodbaths and Boomsticks podcast at: www.bloodbathspodcast.blogspot.com .

Plus you can always go to the greatest T-shirt place online or if you are in Texas visit the store of “Fast Custom Shirts” where T-shirt Joe is the only place you should purchase your horror T-shirts: Go to www.fastcustomshirts.com and support!

 

Gross Movie Reviews #492

0
Posted on by

Gross Movie Reviews #492

 

Rambo: Last Blood (On Demand) – So it seems this is the last entry into a wonderful action series starring Sly Stallone. To be honest it is hard to top the last film in the series as it maybe my favorite for the crazy gore and just get to the good parts kind of flick. This time around John Rambo has supposedly made peace with his past and taken over the family farm just doing his thing. If yinz consider building tunnels under property a normal thing? But Rambo’s niece needs to see her father before she heads off to college and heads into a bad part of Mexico. One of her childhood friends who moved back there sell her out to a cartel that deals in the sex slave trade and that is when Rambo makes it his business to go get her. Spoiler alerts my friends… She dies on the way back that causes Rambo to prepare for war and pretty much took out a whole Mexican cartel with his resourcefulness if that is a word and his tunnels. I personally didn’t like this nearly enough as some others did but it is a “Rambo” film and you get what you pay for and that is Rambo fucking people up as I give it 3 stars.

 

Dismembering Christmas (DVD) – It kills me to talk about this film because the trailer for this independent holiday film had promise but that turned to disappointment once I was no more than twenty minutes in. Young friends get together at a remote cottage for the Christmas holiday instead of spending it with family. Throw away characters show up to tell the group they are basically doomed because of a murder or two that happened a few years ago but of course ignore it. From there the supposed slasher movie is dull and makes you root for the characters to be killed off quickly so you can move on to something else worthy of your time. The film raises so many questions of what is actually going on let alone none of the characters are very likable. I don’t blame the actors as much as I blame the person or persons behind the script as they didn’t have much to work with. It kills me to be this harsh to this independent flick but this was an utter disappointing crap fest that I want to forget as I give it 0 stars.

 

Spill (DVD) – Need more Brian Bosworth in your life then begin your search with this lesser known environmental-action flick from the mid-90s? Yinz may have seen it listed on several apps or channels as “Virus” as the other dozen flicks of the same name. Bosworth plays an ex-football player who now leads the secret service. The ‘Boz’ soon finds himself a part of a deadly germ virus cover up when he is scouting out a location for the president. A truck with a renegade driver crashes in the woods causing a spill that could poison everyone but the president is convinced it is in his best interest to cover it up as quickly as possible. Boz being the good man he is cannot let this go as he seen people die from the spill and tries to convince anyone and everyone this was wrong and covered up by the president as I give it 3 stars.

Weresquito: Nazi Hunter (DVD) – You that feeling of tripping up on an awesome small budget flick you feel no one knows about? Well yinz need to get yourself viewing this wonderful throwback to the late 50s, early 60s creature feature. The filmmaker has a history of shooting films in black and white and looking like they take place several decades ago. And kudos to that crazy bastard because he is good at it! A man shows up in a small town called New Berlin looking for a doctor he knew from the war. But the man is very cautious to let anyone know any other details. John becomes quick friends with a Ms. Schmidt at the diner and they both help each other out. But John’s secret stops romance from budding as when he is angered or sees red he turns into a WERESQUITO! John was experimented on during the war and this transformation is what causes him to search for the doctor that ruined his life. Film buffs everyone rejoice and track this bad boy down as it will not disappoint as I give it 3 ½ stars.

 

Bad Times at the El Royale (DVD) – Too fucking long and would have been so much better if it played out like some crazy lost ‘X-files’ episode. I give it 1 star for having Jeff Bridges play a priest… sort of.

 

Brainstorm (DVD) – A very weird ass movie that stars Christopher Walken who is trying to help explore new forms of communication through a weird brain contraption. This seem more enjoyable when I watched it as a kid on HBO but over 30 years later the film really doesn’t entirely a whole lick of interesting sense as I give it 1 star.

 

Channel 13 (DVD) – A very limited edition DVD/Blu-ray that is a lost film or anthology in this case from the Polonia Brothers that was never finished and never released. Mark Polonia goes into the reason for its release and how it was unearthed as you get to see a project from their early days. It is a couple of stories being told with a wraparound that was recently shot as they never finished what they originally started. A fun project to check out if you are a big independent film fan, if not you just won’t get the early days of the Polonia Brothers as they were one of the pioneers of Independent Cinema. I give this lost project 3 stars.

 

Deadly Games (Shudder) – A 1990 French film that can be found under the title “Dial Code: Santa Claus” is much like a French version of “Home Alone” with a creepy hobo. A rich kid named Thomas still believes in Santa and just like most children that believe he wants to prove to friends he does exist. So through an early version of the internet he contacts Santa but it just happens to be a random hobo. A random hobo who happens to be a toy store Santa for five minutes and gets fired by Thomas’ mum after he was about to go ape shit on a little girl. Instead random hobo finds out there is a Christmas delivery going to Thomas’ home and takes it in person. From Thomas must not only defend himself but protect his almost blind grandfather from the crazy hobo who wants to kill! Weird, kind of fucked up, and the kid has a killer mullet. In my book this film is well worth a watch as I give it 2 ½ stars.

Necrotronic (Shudder) – Thank you to Shudder again for finding random crazy Australian horror films! Apparently since the beginning of time there have always been demons and necromancers fighting especially when the demons started possessing humans. Now some evil bitch has figured out a way to go super high tech and possess a million souls all at once. Meanwhile a guy named Howie who collects poo for a living with his bud is the savior of the necromancers. It all starts when his buddy instead collecting poo is playing a game on his phone that has you collecting ghosts. This is how evil is gonna possess everyone. Weird shit happens with the game and Howie, next up enter the demons who want his soul because the evil mastermind behind the grand plan is his mother… sort of. Oh, did I mention there is a 3-D printer for souls, watch the movie you’ll understand as I give this fun ghost adventure 3 stars.

 

Secret Santa (DVD) – So I tracked down another low budget holiday flick that has college girls and their party being haunted by a “Secret Santa”. Okay let me explain, a masked person leaves them a Secret Santa gift and then they die because they are obsessed with the web cam model that shoves cucumbers into her lady parts. Again it kills me I really like to enjoy these flicks but this was more disorienting than a fun low budget holiday slasher it could have been as I give it 1 star. Bottom-line don’t threaten a killing spree unless you are going to actually give me one.

 

Any comments please send to grossmoviereview@verizon.net or www.facebook.com/grossmoviereviews . Remember folks always support your local independent movie theater, independent video store, and independent filmmakers! It will keep horror alive………

Don’t forget you can also hear Kyle Poling, John Shatzer, and me talking about horror flicks on the Bloodbaths and Boomsticks podcast at: www.bloodbathspodcast.blogspot.com .

Plus you can always go to the greatest T-shirt place online or if you are in Texas visit the store of “Fast Custom Shirts” where T-shirt Joe is the only place you should purchase your horror T-shirts: Go to www.fastcustomshirts.com and support!

Gross Movie Reviews #491

0
Posted on by

Gross Movie Reviews #491

Velocipastor (DVD) – Oh for the love of Rutger Hauer someone has been reading my mind again and I thank them as this movie exists! Young Pastor Doug loses his parents to a rogue car explosion before the opening credits. Being upset with God, Doug wants to find himself because this tragic event has made him question everything so he travels to China or someone’s backyard made to look like it for answers. There Doug is approached by a dying Chinese woman who scratches him with an artifact and calls him “Dragon Warrior”. After this event Pastor Doug finds himself back home at bed unsure of how he got there. Still unsure Pastor Doug takes a walk in the park where he transforms into a raptor that helps a hooker named Carol. Carol being appreciative takes Velocipastor home and tries to convince of what happened and what he can do with his new found powers. But meanwhile ninjas and Doug’s lost brother are all about bringing down our new found superhero! Does Doug become a crime fighting dinosaur or die at the hands of ninjas as give this beautiful movie is amazing and absolutely fucking hilarious as I give it 4 stars!

 

Spanish Chainsaw Massacre (DVD) – As I scrap the bottom of the barrel ‘massacre filmland’ I came across this abomination that has a bunch of random violent scenes and boobs during the first ten minutes of the picture that has nothing to do with the movie. So once you are past that we get the real plot which is barely 60 minutes long about the band ‘Metal Dicks or Cocks’? They use both names during the film so go with whatever penis name you are comfortable with. The band’s manager takes them on tour only to breakdown in a small village that just happens to be full of cannibals who don’t mind taking a bite out of a dong or two. Lots of very wacky and gory scenes of flesh-eating but is it really interesting? It is more disorienting with a few laughs as I give the film 1 star.

 

Bachelor Party Massacre (DVD) – Remember the independent film was made in 2006 so it was influenced by “I Know What You Did Last Summer”. If that doesn’t scare you off then knowing it takes ‘the raincoat killer’ 70 minutes to kill four dudes in an empty bar should as I give this badly produced flick a ½ star.

 

Killer Sofa (DVD) – A crazy dude named Fredrico who is obsessed with a dancer commits suicide to put his spirit into a recliner and for it to be sent to her when found. The recliner is sent to the dancer Francesca who is very accepting of the recliner but soon weird things begin to happen with the piece of killer furniture inside her apartment and she cannot explain it. The movie peaks about halfway through when it completely goes off the rails after killing Francesca’s boyfriend and start talking witches and other random shit of how this killer recliner came to be? Honestly why explain? It is a fucking movie called “Killer Sofa”! Stop over thinking the plot and just give me a sofa eating people, movie done! How fucking hard is it as I give this disappointing movie 1 ½ stars.

 

Murder by Death (DVD) – A 1976 murder/mystery/comedy that was most likely was the influence to the “Clue” movie that is so much fun. Five of the world’s finest detectives are brought together to a spooky mansion to solve a crime that hasn’t been committed yet. The detective that does win will win a million dollars. Great 70s all-star cast provide lots of hilarious moments to a film that may be lost on a generation or two of movie fans. If you’re a movie buff this film is well worth tracking down as I give it 3 stars.

 

Deadtectives (Shudder) – A group of people who have faked a popular paranormal show for five seasons without ever finding any real ghosts! But now the show is tanking and if they don’t have an amazing finale they are going to be canceled. So the group against their wishes has a new producer and sent to Mexico to investigate Mexico’s most haunted place that has a history of people dying there. Not taking it seriously the group does their usual antics until they begin to figure out they are now facing real evil and may not live to tell anyone about it. The group must put their heads together to actually figure how to defeat the evil that resides in the house in order to leave… Funnier than I ever thought it would be as I give it 3 stars.

When the Fever Breaks (DVD) – An independent film that uses zombies as a minor back drop piece in a plot of how friends turn on each other. It begins with friends (one of them, George looks like a bootleg Karl Urban) escaping a horde of zombies to a secure house. People are turning from scratches more than bites and everyone is unsure if the chemical leak had anything to do with the apocalypse that has them running for their lives. Skye and Haley are the best of friends but soon become enemies as Skye is bitten and trapped in her garage with her daughter. Skye is already sentenced to death by friends just because of survival. The second half of the movie becomes more about Skye taking her home back and helping her daughter survive than zombies attacking the home. Again the zombies are just a backdrop here and I believe it to be a very cool thing that was well executed with a twist as I give the film 3 out of 4 stars.

 

Beyond the Law (DVD) – A 1968 spaghetti western starring the late great Lee Van Cleef who plays an outlaw named Cudlip who has two partners in crime who steal the miners’ payroll on its way to the small town Silvertown. Novak is a European man who was protecting the payroll and vows to go back to Greenstone to get the insurance payroll. Totally still looking for what may have happened to the payroll Novak meets Cudlip in the middle of the desert. They quickly become friends on different paths, Novak going to Greenstone to protect the payroll and Cudlip to steal it with his two friends. Everything goes to both plans until real time outlaws show up and start a shoot out to get the payroll. Thanks to Cudlip and friends it doesn’t happen but now the stakes are raised higher for Cudlip to decide if he wants to steal the silver or just become an honest man after he is made sheriff. Great spaghetti western with a great ending as you can never go wrong with Van Cleef as I give it 3 ½ stars.

 

The Grand Duel (DVD) – Some people might know this 1972 film under its other name “The Big Showdown”. Either way it stars Lee Van Cleef as a bad ass old sheriff who is looking to help a condemned young gunfighter. Sheriff Clayton lays his job on the line to defend the kid that is accused of a murder he did not commit. Cleef’s character must face off in a bloody duel with the potential president candidate in order to clear the young man’s name. Great back and forth scenes between Cleef and the young gunfighter as I give the flick 2 ½ stars.

 

Shoot’em Up (DVD) – A completely unrealistic comic bookish action film starring Clive Owen as Mr. Smith who is just minding his own business until a pregnant woman comes running past into an alley. She is tracked down by an unknown man who is trying to kill her. After Mr. Smith takes a bite of his carrot he decides to get involved and from the chaos begins and does not stop until the credits roll. Mr. Smith helps deliver the baby during a shootout with mobsters and escapes with the child who becomes known as Oliver after the mother is shot in the head. Mr. Smith is on the run with Oliver until he meets up with an old friend who happens to be a high priced hooker that feeds breast milk to dudes. No matter what Mr. Smith wants to protect the child for the mere reason a mob boss wants the baby. But if that wasn’t good enough I give you subplot of the baby is a part of some strange government bone marrow experiment for a presidential hopeful! The film blends the outrageous fun of 80s action films with a comic bookish storyline that completely works brilliantly to be enjoyed time after time as I now can take Clive Owen seriously and for that I give 3 stars.

 

Any comments please send to grossmoviereview@verizon.net or www.facebook.com/grossmoviereviews . Remember folks always support your local independent movie theater, independent video store, and independent filmmakers! It will keep horror alive………

Don’t forget you can also hear Kyle Poling, John Shatzer, and me talking about horror flicks on the Bloodbaths and Boomsticks podcast at: www.bloodbathspodcast.blogspot.com .

Plus you can always go to the greatest T-shirt place online or if you are in Texas visit the store of “Fast Custom Shirts” where T-shirt Joe is the only place you should purchase your horror T-shirts: Go to www.fastcustomshirts.com and support!

 

It will be here before you know it: Grossfest 3: Season of the Gross, July 25-26th, 2020. Check out www.grossfest.com for details.

Grossfest 3 has yet another guest announcement!

0
Posted on by

For our next guest announcement, these two filmmakers are hard at work on a couple long awaited independent projects. They both have worked as directors, producers, cinematographers, writers, editors, etc. on a couple independent films you may have heard of? “The Barn, 10/31, The Barn II, Force to Fear, Cryptids, and 10/31 part 2. They have an amazing tight knit talented crew that helps them bring some amazing ideas to life. We all just hope they remember us little people when these folks get uber-famous of course I am talking about the two talented guys from near the Washington, Pa. area: Justin M. Seaman and Zane Hershberger!

 

Grossfest 3: Season of the Gross

July 25th-26th, 2020
The George Washington Hotel
60 South Main St.
Washington, Pa. 15317

www.thegeorgewashington.com

www.grossfest.com

Or find Grossfest on Facebook, Twitter, and Instagram

Gross Movie Reviews #486

0
Posted on by

Gross Movie Reviews #486

 

Walk like a Panther (On Demand) – If you enjoy wrestling movies then you are in for a treat from the UK folks. Mark Bolton is the son of ‘The Bulldog’ one of the original British wrestlers that ran together called, “Panthers”. They use to be on the tele in the 80s and then were canceled to the dismay of many. Mark never got his shot with the Panthers but now runs a pub called “The Half-Nelson” where all the old wrestlers and fans hang out at. They talk about old times, drink a pint, and wait for Mark’s wrestling trivia night. But things change when Mark’s idol Ginger Frost dies. They all go to the pub for the wake and interrupted by a young village idiot who believes wrestling is fake. So when the old timers get a hold of him and start having a good time at his expense as his friends film it on their phones and it goes viral. Between this hilarious turn of events and the pub being sold from under young Mark’s hands he decides to get “The Panthers” back together again for an one hour event to save the pub. Stephen Graham, Julian Sands, Robbie Gee were an absolute hoot in this flick. Maybe not the perfect film but there was many times I laughed my ass off at the screen as I give it 3 ½ stars.

 

The Dead Don’t Die (On Demand) – The latest zombie film to have Bill Murray and a host of other Hollywood names take on zombies in a small town. Bill Murray and Adam Driver are cops of the town Centerville where their highlight is yelling out in the woods at a hobo that Murray’s character knew since high school. But polar fracking has knocked Earth’s axis funny and it has caused several weird things to happen: Prolonged daylight, animals going completely nutzoid, and Iggy Pop and other dead folk to rise from their grave. With no answers but many questions the film becomes one long Seinfeld joke. For good or bad the zombie make-up was cool but I was expecting a little bit of a different movie as I give it 2 stars.

Slaughterhouse Slumber Party (Blu-ray/Vimeo) – Dustin Mills has quickly become one of my favorite filmmakers as he has made all kinds of different horror films. Always trying something different and this is no different for this unapologetic cheesy film about a group of young women getting together once a year for a party weekend. At times shot like a “Big Brother” or “Real World” TV show you get to know all the women and their flaws who are attending this big weekend party. Of course no boys allowed but a new girlfriend Gretchen, has been brought into the event meeting new people and enjoy the fun of being free, drunk, and hope not to have your face farted on! Anyway Gretchen seems a little strange and not all about the new Rocket Ribcage film. Gretchen is more into bringing forth evil supernatural shit. Never thinking much about Gretchen’s weirdness she is accidentally killed in a pillow fight and thus starting off a bunch of demonic bad shit happening to the women. The friends mostly naked and frighten must gather the strength to take on this horror and escape the wrath of Gretchen! If there was ever a movie to be put on a double bill with “Sorority Babes in the Slimeball Bowl-O-Rama” this is it my friends and that is high praise coming from me as I give it 3 ½ out of 4 stars. Dustin be proud my friend and that cast was awesome!

 

Spider-man: Far From Home (On Demand) – The Avengers have disappeared again and Tony Stark is dead. They all saved the world but Peter just wants to get back to normal high school life and that means going to Europe with MJ and friends. This being Peter’s big chance to finally ask MJ out but course things go sideways when Mysterio shows up fighting monsters called, “Elementals”. Nick Fury needs Peter to take over for Stark and help fight these fights. Peter still just wanting to be a high school kid decides to let Mysterio do the job until he learns of the real plan. This newer version of Spider-man was again a lot of fun and really enjoyed the end credit stuff but the real shame is going to be Disney and Sony fighting over the property. Which means most likely we won’t even get to see Tom Holland in college as Spider-man. Fun movie I give 3 ½ stars too but most likely we will see two more sequels to everything else before this problem gets resolved so enjoy it folks.

 

Video Murders (DVD-R/VHS) – Jim McCullough Jr. brings us a lower budgeted film about a serial killer David Lee Shepard. The film opens with David bringing a hooker back to a hotel for the intent of filming her strangulation. The detectives have gotten closer to David as he has left a trail of murder scenes in different cities but with the same motive. The rest of the film entails a detective in not one but two long chase scenes with David. There is some filler with David picking up a woman in a bar because she reminds him of his mother and does not kill her but keeps her tied up. The movie teases this will be sleazefest but is more of a dramatic cat and mouse thriller between David and the detective as I give it 2 stars.

The Dark Days of Demetrius (DVD/Vimeo) – Independent filmmaker Dakota Ray is back with his latest film about a serial killer called “The Live Stream Killer”. This man streams his murders and has a following on social media which in turn he allows his so-called fans to comment on photos and videos. Demetrius desire to kill is consuming him and gets off on that his following is growing by the hundred-thousands with each post. Eventually LSK allows the audience to decide the fate of his victims taking his murderous ways to a new height. But a sadistic reporter of a news website takes notice of LSK and begins to blame him for murders he has nothing to do with in order to have more content for his site. Demetrius can stay as a mystery to police but makes himself known to the reporter who is trying to stain The Live Stream Killer’s name. This is for sure one those hard-hitting films that are not for the fate of heart as it isn’t so much sleazy as much as just one of the darkest films you may watch… For that I give Dakota’s feature 3 out of 4 stars.

Any comments please send to grossmoviereview@verizon.net or www.facebook.com/grossmoviereviews . Remember folks always support your local independent movie theater, independent video store, and independent filmmakers! It will keep horror alive………

Don’t forget you can also hear Kyle Poling, John Shatzer, and me talking about horror flicks on the Bloodbaths and Boomsticks podcast at: www.bloodbathspodcast.blogspot.com .

Plus you can always go to the greatest T-shirt place online or if you are in Texas visit the store of “Fast Custom Shirts” where T-shirt Joe is the only place you should purchase your horror T-shirts: Go to www.fastcustomshirts.com and support!

Sneak preview of the upcoming SEVERE INJURIES blu-ray 2-disk set

0
Posted on by

Sneak preview of the upcoming SEVERE INJURIES blu-ray 2-disk set we hope to have out in October! Designed by Matt Gilligan and given a new coat of paint by Ryan Hose.

Unavailable for years, semi-remastered for blu, SEVERE INJURIES tells the story of Melvin Hubble, (Charlie Fleming), last in a long line of unsuccessful serial killers, making a final stab at glory by sneaking into the Rho Rho Rho sorority house, unaware that another killer lurks there too! (But no worries, this second killer is just as inept!)

Directed by and Starring Amy Lynn Best, Robyn Griggs (“Another World”), HCP’s Bill Homan, Jasi Jovingo (“Swamp Thing”), Tim Gross and Brinke Stevens!

Blu-Ray Disk will include Behind-the-Scenes, Outtakes, Interviews and Were-Grrl (including all the rare Were-Grrl extras that haven’t been seen since 2002!)

Bonus disk will contain a bunch of rare Happy Cloud shorts, including many that have never been on disk before. They include:

* NECK UP! A short made in 1995 before we were even Happy Cloud!
* Tenants – Mike Watt’s senior thesis film starring Amy Lynn Best
* 7:45 of the Dead (2013)
* Retreat (2006)
* High Stakes (produced for “Brinke’s Tales of Terror)
* and the latest, ZOM-B-GONE (2018) written by our nieces!

(Bonuse 16mm easter egg, “Whispered Verses” hidden somewhere on there due to a lack of music rights!)

Availability will be announced soon.

Special thanks to Terry Thome, Justin Channell and especially Henrique Couto!

We finally release all our weekly podcasts we been doing (hahaha)

0
Posted on by

This week we talk about another 3 genre flicks.  The first being THE STEPFATHER,  a classic that Kyle has never seen even though it stars Jill Schoelin his #1 scream queen.  Then we talk about a really weird whack-a-doo police story/serial killer flick in SLAUGHTER OF THE INNOCENTS.  And finally we chat up a Netflix based quasi found footage movie in DEMONIC.  We answer your questions and read all the news that went down during the week.  So, download this episode and make old Scott Glenn happy.

http://bloodbathspodcast.blogspot.com/

This week we are talking about 3 more flicks unearthed from the dusty aisles of the video store.  First we have a sequel of an all time horror jam in THE STEPFATHER 2.  Directed by our good buddy Jeff Burr.  Then we go to the roller derby in the excellent UNHOLY ROLLERS.  And finally we cover a truly oddball film in which Squiggy from Laverne & Shirley dresses as a clown, climbs a tower, and goes on a shooting rampage at an amusement park in the “comedy” FUNLAND.  We also read all the news that was fit to print (or make up) this week.  And as always we answer all your listener questions.

http://bloodbathspodcast.blogspot.com/

This week we have 3 more flicks to bend your mind.  First we have Nazis invading a keep only to find a kick ass monster in another Scott Glenn jam in THE KEEP.  Then we cover Kyle’s all time Schwarzenegger flick in THE RUNNING MAN.  And lastly we have a weird giallo flick from the director of Cannibal Holocaust that stars all-time great Donald Pleasence in PHANTOM OF DEATH.  Along the way we talk about some new news things and as always we answer all your listener questions.  So be like Captain Freedom and download this episode.

http://bloodbathspodcast.blogspot.com/

This time around we have yet another 3 flicks to split your wig.  First we watch a truly bizarre flick featuring puppets, Coleco-Vision, public sex, liquor sandwiches, and phantasm spheres in NIGHTMARE WEEKEND.  Next we talk about zombie animals in ZOOMBIES 2.  And lastly we cover a live action adaptation of a very popular anime series in FIST OF THE NORTH STAR.  And as always we chat over the news and read your listener questions.  So, download this episode or Big Van Vader will beat you up and take your lunch money.

http://bloodbathspodcast.blogspot.com/

This week we hand pick another 3 flicks out of the dustbin of the internet for review.  First we try really hard for Tim to get into the trailer bark boys, but ultimately Tim fucks it up as we talk about TRAILER PARK BOYS: COUNTDOWN TO LIQUOR DAY.  Then we talk of a tale of witches in the woods in EYES OF FIRE.  And lastly Kyle’s Dad (Roy Schneider) flips helicopters in BLUE THUNDER.  And as we do every week we talk about all the newest news and answer your listener questions.  So download this episode and get a physics lesson on the proper way to do sweet loop-de-loops in helicopters.

http://bloodbathspodcast.blogspot.com/

 This week it is with heave hearts we do the show because we lost a true legend.   As Tim always says “The Man, The Myth, The Legend” Rutger Hauer has passed on.  So we honor the man by reviewing 4 of his flicks.  First we have the very nekkid Jennifer Jason Lee and Rutger Hauer storming’ castles and fucking everywhere in the Paul Veerhoven directed FLESH AND BLOOD.   Then we have a spy thriller starring everyone including Craig T. Nelson’s porn stache in THE OSTERMAN WEEKEND.  Then we have a pile of straight to video garbage in TURBULENCE 3: HEAVY METAL.  And bringing up the rear we have the Canadian grindhouse influenced HOBO WITH A SHOTGUN.  So join us in honoring the legend that was Rutger Hauer.

http://bloodbathspodcast.blogspot.com/

This week Tim starts his 3 week suspension handed down from Karen the head of podcasting H.R.  so Kyle and John fall back on a familiar topic… BONER JAMZ!!!  First we have a flick neither one of us has seen in SPLITZ from 1987.  Then we move on to an out of the box kinda boner jam in GHOULIES 3: GHOULIES GO TO COLLEGE (HEY!  It’s got boobs, college shenanigans, and gross out humor so it counts as a boner jam in my book)  And lastly a real hum dinger in the movie that has to have the most hair gel ever used in a production in VALET GIRLS.  Also we cover the news and we read all of your viewer mail.  So download the episode or CBGB’s will shut down… oh wait!

http://bloodbathspodcast.blogspot.com/

This week Tim serves his 2nd week of forced podcast suspension but Kyle and john are here to pick up the slack with a couple fine flicks you may have missed over the last few years.  First the hostage based cannibal splatter movie GRAVY from 2015.  Then we chat about MA starring the fantastic Octavia Spencer.  And as always we answer your questions and cover all the news that was fit to print.  So, download this episode or this podcast will eat you.  #FreeTimGross

http://bloodbathspodcast.blogspot.com/

Gross Movie Reviews #484

0
Posted on by

Gross Movie Reviews #484

 

Elevator (YouTube) – All around cool filmmaker Jim Stramel is back with his latest short film that involves a woman and a man who get on an elevator together. They do not know each other but it is about to get very interesting… Both take turns having their worlds going weird and gory. Could it be sexual tension? Just two deranged individuals happen to get on the elevator? Or is it something even stranger? You be the judge as this was a cool treat to see from Mr. Stramel as I give it 3 out of 4 stars.

 

Vacation Massacre (YouTube) – Oh the digging I go looking for ‘massacre’ films as unearthed this unknown S.O.V. flick that’s claims 2001? A few kids head out into the woods with their pump action pellet guns to go hunting. While out there they come across a dead body that begins a series of events once back at their tent. They awake in the morning to it all being a dream but then it all begins to actually take place. Not bad for a couple of kids that most likely stole the parents camera for filming but seems to be a bit unfinished? Anyway if you are a fan of S.O.V. stuff it’s fun checking out this 2 star project… Yes, there is much worse out there.

 

Welcome Home, Brother Charles (DVD) – Charles is up to no good as usual because bottom-line is he needs to make his money and isn’t gonna let the ‘man’ get in the way. But after meeting up with partner at the local hotel they have noticed they are being watched by the ‘man’. The two run in different directions with Charles getting picked up by the police. For what charge not totally sure but one detective isn’t satisfied with running Charles down but beating him up while in handcuffs and then taking a straight razor to his manhood. For this Charles gets three years in the slammer. After being released Charles is a reformed man and wants to stay out of trouble. Understanding it is tough he meets up with a new woman and stops her pimp about to put a beat down on her. Things are looking up for the two until that damn white cop that damaged Charles manhood is considered a local hero on the news. This sends Charles into a rage of revenge as he tracks down the individuals that wronged him, hypnotize their wives, and then strangle the white men with his snake like dong! No shit people I was not expecting this to go down and made for an eye opening exploitation flick. Well worth the watch for super dong and the ending as I give it 3 stars.

 

Dead Teenagers (DVD) – A college student heads to the library and comes across an odd notebook that is on the floor called: “Book of Lore”. He sits to read through the book that happens to have four tales of terror inside: ‘The Boo Men’ is about a young man facing his fear. ‘Full Moon Lighting’ is a tale of a young man coming back from Europe with a secret and finds his ex-girl has one of her own. ‘Skeleton Keys’ is where a young woman heads to her dead grandma’s house to sort out some things. ‘Suckers’ happens to be about a young man who is about to be out of a theater job because it is closing. But first he must fend of vampires that have infested the theater. This was literally one of those middle of the road anthologies. None of the tales sucked out loud but none of them stood out either so take that for what it is as I give the anthology 2 stars.

The Banana Splits Movie (On Demand) – I am ecstatic this film exists! Was it perfect, hell no but it was a fun gory mess of a horror film. So-called film critics, “GET THE FUCK OVER YOURSELF!” Why this as many other recent horror movies just upset you just to get your clicks I will never understand and maybe that is a good thing. Go be miserable for your clicks somewhere else… Anyway who would have guessed the internet joke that appeared late last year would become a reality? Was it a test or was it something always in the works? Doesn’t matter now as the horror movie is based off of a late 60s kids TV show in present day. Harley’s birthday is today and his family has plans to take him to a live taping of his favorite TV show. While the kids pour into the studio for the live taping it is learned back stage that the robots/Banana Splits will not be needed any longer as the show has been canceled. As the show must go on the Banana Splits have their own agenda as they go on a murderous rampage and kidnap children for their more evil show. I won’t get into too much detail so some of yinz horror fans can enjoy this project but I would have liked a more detailed reason on the reason for the Splits going chaotic? Like I said, “not perfect” but the project was entertaining and gory as I give it 3 stars.

 

Ghastlies (DVD) – Another Brett Kelly project released from Camp Motion Pictures that five years ago has aliens landing on Earth during a cult ritual. Now present day four ladies head out to a remote cabin for some sorority girl ritual or of course just a weekend of partying. The nerdy girl of the group wonders about and finds a VHS tape and plays it. On the tape is a young woman warning anyone who watched it that she is most likely dead but hopes the things she trapped in the fruit cellar/storm basement are also. Once disturbed the puppet creature/aliens begin to devour the humans at the cabin. Their main goal is to eat mankind one human at a time. Always been a fan of Brett Kelly so I looked forward to checking this one out but seem to be a little of a letdown. I thought I was getting an Indy version of “Gremlins”, “Munchies”, or even “Ghoulies” but came off as more of an unfinished project or a couple ideas cobbled together and not seen entirely through. I may only give this film 1 star but still a fan of Mr. Kelly and will be always on the lookout for his next project.

 

Nemesis 5: The New Model (DVD) – You know me I cannot stay from these sequels especially when the opening that explains the movie doesn’t make a whole lick of sense? In the distant future a young girl is sent into the past to be trained by a warrior named Alex to become a savior in the future to fight the Red Army. She is mostly robotic but has more human traits than other cyborgs that helps set her a part in her goal of helping mankind. I spent most of the movie trying to figure out why they didn’t fix the past if they were able to send someone back to be trained? Yeah it is nothing like Albert Pyun underground video classics we remember but you know me if they continue the series somehow I usually end up watching it as I give it 1 star.

 

Hell House LLC (Shudder) – So people come in and decide to investigate and put together a documentary on the tragic event of October 8, 2009 called “Hell House”. It is five years later and still no one has answers to what exactly happened to this Haunted House attraction that on opening night kills 15 people including the group that help build the haunt inside. Through found footage we learn the group begins to experience weird things as they live inside this old closed down hotel and turn it into a cool haunted attraction. The head of the group Alex is hell bent on keeping the haunt going so opening night they can make their money. But as the group begins to question why they are still there Alex convinces them it will be worth it once the lines grow outside opening night. When the attraction opens, chaos begins as things and demons appear, blood flows, and people begin running for their lives. A pretty decent horror flick that paranormal fans should enjoy as I give it 2 ½ stars and a better alternative to the “Grave Encounters” films.

 

Hell House LLC II: The Abaddon Hotel (Shudder) – Two years have passed since the interview with a survivor or supposedly a survivor and the disappearance of the reporter Diane. Now a woman who runs a blog is interested in the mystery and wants to investigate the hotel for some tapes that may explain everything that actually happened in the hotel and explain the event in 2009? Her and her two man crew recruits the man behind the documentary and visit along with a medium that has a new show he wants to promote. Once they walk in they soon have been checked in and become part of the legend called Hell House. Some good scares again and begins to explain some interesting back story that makes both of the films an interesting watch and rewatch as I give the sequel 3 stars.

Bad Moon (DVD) – Michael Pare is Uncle Ted out in Nepal doing work. One night Ted and his assistant decide to get buck wild when a bad ass werewolf rips through their tent and tears them a part. A couple months go by as Ted is state side and contacts his sister. Unbeknownst to the sister and her kid Ted has been changing every night ripping through any hiker or group of people wandering through the remote woods. Now the authorities investigating the brutal murders of a possible animal attack Ted moves his trailer to his sister’s house but the family dog isn’t having it. As Ted slowly slips away into the wolf taking over night after night the family dog takes upon itself to attack to protect the family. Great screenplay, great cast, cool werewolf effects, and an awesome fight between the family dog and werewolf! A wonderful 1996 werewolf movie that is unknown to a lot of horror fans. This is always my first film I mention when crazy people always say, “There isn’t any good werewolf movies.” Example: THIS FILM as I give it 4 star stuff right here werewolf fans!

 

Any comments please send to grossmoviereview@verizon.net or www.facebook.com/grossmoviereviews . Remember folks always support your local independent movie theater, independent video store, and independent filmmakers! It will keep horror alive………

Don’t forget you can also hear Kyle Poling, John Shatzer, and me talking about horror flicks on the Bloodbaths and Boomsticks podcast at: www.bloodbathspodcast.blogspot.com .

Plus you can always go to the greatest T-shirt place online or if you are in Texas visit the store of “Fast Custom Shirts” where T-shirt Joe is the only place you should purchase your horror T-shirts: Go to www.fastcustomshirts.com and support!

Second guest announcement for Grossfest 2020

0
Posted on by

For our second Guest Announcement, we searched the deepest and darkest parts of the independent film community and wound up at a Circus?!?!?
With such hits as “Dollboy” and “Circus of the Dead” and with his latest film “Cowboys from Hell” shaping up to be all sorts of amazing! From the heart of Texas, we proudly bring you for the first time to the Washington/Pittsburgh area, the baddest man to hold a guitar since Jimi Hendrix, Mr. Billy “bloody bill” Pon!

First Grossfest 2020 announcement!

0
Posted on by

A guest announcement I believe all independent horror fans will be delighted to see in person… You may have seen him in recent independent films such as “It Stains the Sands Red”, “Another Wolfcop”, or “Meathook Massacre 4”? His career has recently taken off and he will be seen in several upcoming horror projects. But like me most know him as the director, writer, and actor in the recent masterpiece “Pool Party Massacre”.  I am happy to introduce you to Drew Marvick!

P.S. Vendor table info coming soon!

 

Grossfest 3: Season of the Gross

July 25th-26th, 2020
The George Washington Hotel
60 South Main St.
Washington, Pa. 15317

www.thegeorgewashington.com

www.grossfest.com

Or find Grossfest on Facebook, Twitter, and Instagram