Gross Movie Reviews #574

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Gross Movie Reviews #574

Doctor Death Seeker of Souls (DVD) – This hilariously fun horror flick from the early 70s centers around a man name Fred who is trying to get over his wife’s death and feeling somewhat guilty? Last thing she said to Fred is, “she will return to him”. Fred hanging on to this spends several months tracking down séances, etc., trying to contact his wife, but no luck. Fred is introduced to Doctor Death who has a mysterious past and works like a magician but not so fast he has some dark powers of transference or transferring a soul to another body for a certain fee of course. Doctor Death is paid $50000 by Fred but nothing happens… Disgusted by the act Fred calls it quits and starts bumping uglies with his hot assistant. But Doctor Death cannot let it go and begins a murder spree of women trying to make this one transference right? I believe this glorious 70s cheese still works and worth checking it out like I did if you never heard of it as I give it 3 stars.

The Weirdsies (Blu-ray) – One of the last films from Indy filmmaker Chris Seaver in 2015 who now has turned to doing episodic TV for his You Tube channel did a disturbing parody of ‘Stand by Me’. A funny but yet disturbing adventure of four friends who want to lose their “V-card” during the summer. Their adventure is because they know about a dead body and the plan is to go to it and fuck the shit out of it because supposedly after death the male boner stays erect for 48 hours? (I wasn’t going to look this shit up but you gotta admit, real or not, that’s funny.) If that wasn’t enough there is a group of bullies that want to beat these four virgins to the punch by finding the body first to ruin a good time. And for just for extra spice there is about 40 second-rant about running into cannibal hipsters that I am still laughing about many days after watching. Chris Seaver: intelligent, dumb, or indifferent I was never a huge fan of his work but throughout his independent film career he does seem to surprise me with a project where I believe he shows off a talent that separates himself from just being average. As he proves one more time with this timeless funny adventure I give 3 out of 4 stars.      

The Scarlet Agency (DVD) – Witch Doctor Films is back with another entry into the “Anton Rook” series. Anton Rook is no longer a trusted man by the agency but things change when an evil man may have found a way to produce an invisible man that would lead to making an invisible army for world domination. This invisible man seeks out Rook’s help to try and stop this madman and with Rook’s new protégé they craft a plan but as usual not all as it seems in Rook’s universe as no one can ever be trusted. As usual this independent film is well-crafted and goes from just feeling another fan-made episode of ‘Doctor Who’ to reaching deeper into the character of Rook and making it more of a well-crafted Indy James Bond flick! Well done my friends at Witch Doctor Films as yinz continue to go against the grain and produce some different and exciting independent projects to sometimes a stale genre of filmmaking as I give the film 3 out of 4 stars.

Blood Thirst (DVD) – A lesser known murder/mystery from the Philippines where several murders have taken place where women have been strung up and drained of blood. Miguel the lead investigator has a world renowned detective friend in New York and has asked him into his country to help solve these vicious murders. The detective a super white dude acts as a tourist to not attract attention while helping Miguel but both uncover something more sinister than they ever thought as the bloodless bodies continue to pile up! Maybe not the best serial killer film but definitely a good one from 1971 that has a little twist to what exactly is going on as I give it 2 ½ stars.

Without Warning (Blu-ray) – This is 1980 alien invasion flick that has a lot of cool people infront of the camera and behind the camera at the same time. An alien has landed on Earth in a mountain countryside of course where it is able to do its thing without question. A couple of cub scouts and hunters hanging out in the woods find this out the hard way as the alien throws starfish blood suckers at them like ninja stars! After some friends get separated and a couple become dinner for the killer starfish and alien their friends want revenge and go to the local tavern to meet up with a crazy war vet and a mean loner. The second half of the film is mostly the characters of Sarge and Taylor fighting over who is going to kill the alien instead of actually doing the deed. The Blu-ray has a few interesting extras that make this package exciting for horror film collectors to have their collection but I have always viewed this film as “one of those should have been better with all who were attached?” as I give the film 2 stars but the Blu-ray package itself 3 ½ stars.

Slugs (Blu-ray) – Plain and simple this is a horror film about killer slugs! A small rural town where people are getting eaten up killer slugs that may have mutated in the sewers when they were disturbed by a new strip mall project. The project is being built on top of an old chemical dumping area during the 60s and 70s and they have broken the seal causing the slugs to feast on human flesh! The heroes are two utility workers who must figure a way out to kill these things before they infest the whole town. The Blu-ray is well worth investment if a fan of the film as not only the film looks great restored as I believe for decades we all had that VHS/DVD release? But also this package has a couple commentaries and a few short interviews that leads into why and where this movie got made which I never knew the film was Spanish, cool shit people. I give this new Blu-ray package of ‘Slugs’ 3 ½ stars.

Homebodies (VHS) – This is a creepy and disturbing mid-70s film that may stick with you as a group of older folk are being driven out of their homes in the name of progress. Their buildings have been condemned and slowly they are being escorted out of their apartments where their have lived most of their adult lives. With construction happening all around them the leader of their group Mattie has a plan as she likes to watch the work go on or I should say her plan go into action? The group slowly sabtoges the new construction in order to have their evictions delayed but the rich boss doesn’t care how many of his crew die its progess! But these old folk will kill whoever gets in their way. It is terribly sad, hilarious, and screwed up all at the same time with an ending I really enjoyed. Been looking for a lesser sadistic horror film to brighten your day look no further than this film as I give the 1974 feature 3 stars.

Miami Connection (DVD) – Ninjas, a biker gang, with cocaine fighting a pop band in Miami who also just happen know martial arts… Yep, I will watch that shit! This 1987 film is like one big 86 minute fight scene that includes cheesy music that feels like it was stolen from an early Nintendo game as I give it 2 ½ stars for just entertaining the hell out of me.

A Meowy Dark Timeline (www.SteveBuster.com) – So Steve Rudzinski fans, Steve continues to make entertaining content for his streaming service outside of his wonderful features as this one is a short five part series that involves all the characters you know and love. The evil emperor is in another universe and has found a way to conquer this alternate universe as it fights its way through several of Steve’s characters from past films. This is a project full of heart for all those people who nerd out over what the talented Mr. Rudzinski has created over the years. You will laugh, you might cry, but Steve knows what to give his fans when it comes to content. So you asked for it and Steve provides as I give this short series project 4 out of 4 stars for the mere reason finding a way to include everything and available at www.stevebuster.com or on Blu-ray at www.silverspotlightfilms.com .

Hell of the Evil Dead (Blu-ray) – Rock Bottom Video who continue to produce smart and different horror titles for the Indy world to eat up has this fun project from a few years back that stars the talents of Brian Papandrea, Sadie Tate, and Nathan Rumler. This isn’t your ordinary feature as they go with a dubbed Italian version (regular English version is on the Blu-ray) to give the feature even more of a fun “Italian filmmaking feel” and it worked. Four friends go camping and stumble upon a graveyard out in the forest that after finding it weird things begin to happen: the path disappears, weird creature like sounds, and day turns to night without changing back. The four move deeper into the woods hoping to outlast or outrun this evil presence but things only get much worse when they find a trailer/cottage with a lone survivor to tell his story of what happened. Great acting, love the whole Italian dubbed thing as it gave the film a whole different feel to it, great pacing, and some good special effects work (head exploding). Indy fan don’t let the title fool you this film needs to be seen. Plus, there is a couple extras that include a disturbing “lost scene” from the film that needs to be witnessed (Thank you Nathan Rumler and Brian Papandrea for not taking yourselves too serious, that extra is glorious) as I give this film 3 ½ out of 4 stars. (Rock Bottom Video can be found on Facebook)

Robo Warriors (DVD/YouTube) – Kids, ‘Robot Jox 3’ or ‘2’ has been found… Wait a second there was another one? Yep, I didn’t know either until I was watching something that was sent to me by a great movie friend. The film is based on Stuart Gordon characters, has Richad Band’s music, giant robots fighting in the future for mankind, distributed by Paramount… Sounds like a sequel to me!? Anyway, by 2036 some aliens invade Earth and are complete dicks as they enslave mankind. A group of resistance fighters led by James Remar make their way into a jungle to recover an Earthbot. This is their only chance to survive and protect the planet. The mission fails but Remar’s character Gibson escapes and disappears. Some time passes but a kid has done his research and believes he can get the Earthbot going again if he can find it? With the help of Gibson they retrieve it and give humans hope again but they must use it to fight in one huge Robot battle with control of the world in the balance. Full Moon and Empire fans will go ape shit over watching this and if they never had the pleasure of stumbling over this feature as I give it 2 ½ stars.

Any comments please send to grossmoviereview@verizon.net or www.facebook.com/grossmoviereviews .

Plus you can always go to the greatest T-shirt place online or if you are in Texas visit the store of “Fast Custom Shirts” where T-shirt Joe is the only place you should purchase your horror T-shirts: Go to www.fastcustomshirts.com and support!

Gross Movie Reviews #573

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Gross Movie Reviews #573

Nightmares (Blu-ray) – A wonderful anthology film from the early 80s that might be best known for the video game segment. Funny thing by time 1990 rolled around not only was this film no longer playing on cable TV it seem to disappear with the video stores as music rights kept this film from a whole generation of horror fans from seeing if not halfway into a second generation. Unlike most anthologies this didn’t have a wraparound or a horror host! This gave you chapters that didn’t run too long and for me at least was a fun rewatch a great revisit and reminds me to explain to horror fans you haven’t seen all the anthologies until you seen this one? Anyway, the first chapter deal with the killer is in the backseat of the car. The second chapter is the one everybody remembers where Emilio before the killer trucks takes on a video game where the graphics are horrible by today’s standards but he is obsessed with a video game. The third story is one of my favorites called; “Benediction” where Lance Henriksen is a priest that has lost his way and finds the devil in the desert in a blacked-out window Silverado that he must battle. Then the fourth story is the Devil Rat where it is trying to eat a kid! Sorry kids under 30, next to “Creepshow” I absolutely enjoy this movie and knowing it is out legit on Blu-ray is just a wonderful feeling as I give it 3 ½ stars.   

Bikini Bloodbath Car Wash (DVD) – A sequel from 2008 and that is written and directed by “who in the fuck cares” (literally) this film star Debbie Rochon who runs a car wash whose employees are beautiful nubile women. Once these young women pull out an Ouija board and bring a killer chef back to life. If you want boobs this film has it, if you are looking for a story you might wanna check out the next feature? Honestly I know this was a thing in 2006, 2007, 2008, etc., but just don’t feel it holds up well as I give it 1 ½ stars just for Debbie Rochon.

Steel-Man the Movie (DVD) – This is the 2 hour and 12 minute theatrical cut not the 3 hour plus cut that is available if interested? Our film begins with our hero covered in blood and desperately trying to explain what had happened to him or how he got there? The story is from David Michael Palmer Jr. who is Steel-Man in which for movie sakes runs two successful businesses out of the old C3 Mall and the biggest Italian boss in town owns it. Of course the two entities do not get along. This Italian mob boss is trying to figure out how to get rid of Steel-Man so he is able to sell off the old C3 Mall. But things do not go well when you combine satanic strippers at Club Ballz that causes a bunch of zombie shit to happen at the Steel-Man Comi-con! From there is only one hero you can count on and that is Steel-Man to figure out the cause and how to clean up the mess caused by the zombie horde at the comi-con. This super ambitious Indy superhero project has its moments, has some laughs, has a good amount of blood, references to NOTLD,  but the running time will always be something Indy fans will not be happy with as I give it 2 out of 4 stars.

Harvest of Blood (DVD) – A short horror film where a kid Benny visits Mr. Boo the scarecrow on regular basis to have conversations with him. The neighbors are not happy but who cares as the kid isn’t doing anything to their lawn but the kid gets murdered in front of Mr. Boo and that is when things change? This murder of the kid and his belief brings Mr. Boo to life to seek revenge… You can find the film at www.leagacyverseproductions.com and I give it 2 ½ out of 4 stars.

Rotten Harvest (DVD) – A sequel to 2012s ‘Harvest of Blood’ that deals with a tight knit family who bring an individual to their cornfield to seek revenge for his transgressions. But this Mr. Boo’s cornfield and he is cleaning up the cornfield he watches over as I give this short film 2 out of 4 stars and can be found at www.legacyverseproductions.com .

Fear the Reaper (DVD) – A beautiful young woman is having horrific dreams of other people being murdered by a figure in a dark costume or a reaper costume. These dreams/visions are haunting the young lady and they are not what they seem as she is being used by a demonic force? Kinda hard to explain but an interesting concept as I give the film 2 out of 4 stars and can be found at www.legacyverseproductions.com .

Reaper Reborn (DVD) – The story of the “Reaper” continues as it was thought to be dead but rises again to murder as it is a very hard to kill presence. This short film mainly deals with the Reaper pissed off and looking to fight a young witch. This film feels incomplete and for good reason as it’s just a hold over for the next film or finale in the “Reaper” series. This should have not been by itself but just combined with the next project “Absence of Evil”, unless it was originally a web series or something but still then should have been one whole project as I give it 1 out of 4 stars and can be found at www.legacyverseproductions.com .

In the Absence of Evil (DVD) – Another entry into the “reaper” series where this picks up right after the demonic force is supposedly defeated by the young witch? This event just sends ordinary people into random killing rages and copying the “Reaper” or is he just gathering an army? Again this would have felt completed if it was one movie with ‘Reaper Reborn’ but you will be lost without the other as I give this 1 out of 4 stars and can be found at www.legacyverseproductions.com .

Reaper’s Revenge (DVD) – Supposedly the finale of the ‘Reaper’ series as the beginning of the film does its best to get everyone up to speed what has happened and what’s going on? The Reaper and the witch have gone back and forth for the better part of three films but this time around as it is using dumb humans to do his bidding it is able to kill the witch… Of course that isn’t it as we got demonic presence, vampires, vampire hunters, witches, and time travel as the Reaper believes he has reached his “Endgame”? I may only give this whole series 1 or 1 ½ out of 4 stars but believe different actors but same people behind the camera and script this series may have turned out a little better in my opinion as you can also find this at www.legacyverseproductions.com .

A Midsummer Nightmare (DVD) – A woman who is trapped in her own dream loop where she has had enough and just wants to end the madness? But the biggest issue is she is a part of something screwing with her for its investigation. I give this little project 2 out of 4 stars.

Evil Laugh (DVD) – First time watch for this rather lesser known slasher horror flick where a group of med students are invited to a fancy home for the weekend. Once there the group is supposed to help fix it up to be a good foster home for their friend Jerry but the home has a terrible past and a killer still haunts the grounds of the home. Not a real exciting slasher film that might be better known for starring Scott Baio’s brother than actually being a film you are willing to watch as I give it 1 ½ stars.   

Ten Doors (DVD) – Filmmaker Gordy Price is back with a new project that is best known for ‘Music Store Massacre’ in 2014. This is a tough tale about a character named Gabe who after dying in 1865 visits several realties or limbos depending how you take this? Is it hell or is it purgatory and is he supposed to try and save people along the way as there is talk of restoring order and murder is okay… Devil, limbo, and a question about suicide make this film not your typical Indy project that has an odd Twin Peaks feel to it. Seems like a well-produced project but in the end I feel like I am missing something and that this will be a film hard to sell to Indy horror fans that are used to tits, blood, S.O.V., shaky-cam and sometimes a horrible sock monster as I give this project 2 out of 4 stars.

Any comments please send to grossmoviereview@verizon.net or www.facebook.com/grossmoviereviews .

Plus you can always go to the greatest T-shirt place online or if you are in Texas visit the store of “Fast Custom Shirts” where T-shirt Joe is the only place you should purchase your horror T-shirts: Go to www.fastcustomshirts.com and support!

Gross Movie Reviews #572

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Gross Movie Reviews #572

The Living Dead at Manchester Morgue (Blu-ray) – Many people also know it as ‘Let Sleeping Corpses Lie’ but that doesn’t stop it from being a popular zombie flick among horror fans. George an antiques dealer heads out to the country to get away from people and industry for the weekend but that is thrown into chaos when a ditzy woman named Christina backs over his bike. Together the two head out to Christina’s sisters’ place. Things go bad when Christina cannot stop talking about the beast that came for her. The two arrive to find the sister in hysterics and the husband dead and the detective believes “the damn hippie”, George, is capable of doing the dirty deed. Now the two must stick around for the investigation but after some of their own research George believes it is the ultra-sonic radioactive device being used experimentally to kill parasites on a farm is the cause. Got some gore, got some unstoppable zombies, and we got a cop that always believes the hippie did it so I am in as I give the film 2 ½ stars but 4 out of 4 stars all the way for Synapse Films going all out giving UK zombie fans an absolute pristine Blu-ray. The film looks beautiful, super colorful and it is like watching it for the first time again… Synapse made sure to pack this disc with a couple commentaries, a documentary on filmmaker Jorge Grau along with a few other goodies that will make you happy you made this purchase so go to www.synapse-films.com for your copy now.

Studio 666 (On Demand) – So The Foo Fighters are working on another album but have hit a snag? It is their tenth album and they are feeling pressure from their manager to make this happen but Dave Grohl and company haven’t got anything on paper. The manager super-hot with their pissing around sends them to a known haunted house in Encino, California to actually work on the new album. They all agree it has a great creepy death vibe but think nothing of it until weird things begin to happen and their roadie is killed while hooking up equipment. Meanwhile trying to continue on and Dave having writer’s block he does find the basement where he finds a bad ass never finished track from the band “Dream Widow”. He quickly becomes possessed and is determined to finish this epic song which will be the whole album! There are demons, possession, talk of Satan, great music, humor, and who would have guessed that Dave Grohl can actually act? Now I won’t go “one of the best films of 2022” but this was a lot of fun and a pleasant surprise for horror movie fans as I give it 3 stars.

Feeders 3 (DVD) – Mark Polonia dips into the Polonia Brothers archive to make the ‘Feeders’ franchise a trilogy. These two Indy cult films were from the mid to late 90s starring the brothers and Jon McBride and have garnished some fanfare from Indy collectors as some of the most fun films you could see? Well, 25 years later and the aliens have returned to harvest humans as the usual Polonia cast all make an appearance including “a photo and footage from the past two films of Jon McBride” (that was a nice touch). A F.B.I. agent is visiting Wellsboro, Pa. as it is the anniversary and been 25 years since the “Wellsboro 10” with the case never being solved. He is investigating the lone survivor Derek who is still hanging out in an asylum following the event many years ago but still trying to warn all the people Wellsboro aliens are coming to harvest them! To give the film some filler and humor is the filmmaker making a cheap film on the “Wellsboro 10” but that doesn’t even matter because the highlight might be the aliens setting a trap for Santa Claus… Cheesy and stupid but it made me laugh my ass off as I give this third entry into the “Feeders” franchise 2 ½ stars.

Dominion (DVD) – I am always a sucker for late 80s to mid-90s direct-to-video stuff. Especially when it stars Tim Thomerson and Brion James! Anyway a group of hunters head for a super special secluded hunting/camping grounds that is run by Lynnwood Adventures. But after an accident last year the owner Lynnwood hasn’t been seen or heard from much leaving his partner in charge. So when Harris and his group are being shot at by a sniper on a bridge in the mountains its Lynnwood who wants revenge on all hunters for accidentally killing his kid. Not the best of action flicks but I am a sucker for stuff like this every time and I give it 2 stars.

Bloody Pit of Horror (DVD) – A fun oddball flick from the 60s where the legend of The Crimson Executioner is still haunting a castle over 300 years later. He was entombed into his own device the ‘Iron Maiden’ (insert Bill and Ted joke here) to never be opened. But the tomb is accidentally opened when a group of people who break into the castle to take risky photographs using the castle as the backdrop. Soon people are being murdered and could it be the Crimson Executioner is back? Or is it the retired strong man who has lost his marbles living there? Anyway the whole time I kept waiting for Santo or Batman to show up. Looking for pointless fun then make this your first stop as this film caused me to laugh quite a few times as I give it 2 ½ stars.

New Year’s Evil (Blu-ray) – I will admit I have only watched this film twice in my life this being the third and very late to the party of seeing this early holiday slasher. Hell, this one gets forgotten often when horror fans talk slashers? Anyhow third time was a charm because this updated Blu-ray from Kino Lorber is ridiculously awesome! There were literally whole scenes I had never understood because of how crappy the quality was on the other versions I watched.  But anyhow TV host is counting down the ‘New Wave’ music each hour until the ball drops but there is a killer on the loose named “Evil” who is killing a person for each time zone. Can he be stopped in time before he kills Blaze? It has its moments but nowhere as good as some of the other holiday titles but this Blu-ray is a definite for the hardcore collectors out there as I give it 2 ½ stars.

Dash Cam (On Demand) – If you took the recent film ‘Spree’ and the found footage film ‘Area 51’ jammed them together and make sure the lead character is a despicable American you will hate in the first five minutes of the film that is your film here? Anyhow Annie doesn’t believe in the pandemic and flies to the UK to fuck with her friend who is living a different life during the pandemic. Annie like most young people has a live stream show called “Band Car” where she is constantly rapping or just recording everything she does. Annie is having a good old time being a complete asshole until she meets Angela and her weirdness and still finds a way to be an asshole and a classic example why many people believe humanity should just end since we all have no common sense any longer? For the most part this film wasn’t made for me and I think making the Annie character such an asshole along with the scrolling on the side of the screen takes away from any momentum you are trying to scare people with the Angela character. I give this quickly forgotten film 1 star.

Art House Massacre (DVD) – This 2012 film is hidden in plain sight called ‘Art of Darkness’ but its original title is so much better and makes so much more sense. Besides three minutes in we have a great eye gouge scene there is an artist who works with flesh let’s say. Liz is a model who has taken a break because she and the boyfriend try to have a baby I believe and they lost it. She takes a modeling gig begrudging but knows they need the money. She meets the artist/serial killer and is kidnapped for far more demented reasons. Ben the boyfriend pursues looking for her with no answers and the cops being to slow but both parties find out much more unsettling truths about the artist once they start digging hoping for a clue to find Liz. This was a nice surprise as the usual ‘massacre’ crap is crap where this was a nice sadistic serial killer film that I give 2 ½ stars.

Nightmare Beach (Blu-ray) – Great cast, its 1988, Umberto Lenzi is connected to this project, it stars John Saxon and Michael Parks, I felt like I was in for a cheeseball treat! A notorious biker Diablo is executed right before spring break in South Florida for a murder he did not commit. But justice was done to make the mayor happy until it isn’t long before Diablo’s grave is disturbed and a mysterious biker is roaming the streets for rando spring breakers to execute them. This movie doesn’t disappoint with the 80s cheese as the whole thing comes down to a cover up by John Saxon’s cop character and the mayor. I had a lot fun watching this for the first time and looks absolutely wonderful, again thank you Kino Lorber as I give it 3 stars.

Frankenstein 1970 (DVD) – No where the best of the Boris Karloff films but Karloff plays the Baron Frankenstein who is concerned about his legacy? Being broke and needing money for equipment he allows a film crew into his castle and begins to even interact with the filming while he is busy with his toilet paper Frankenstein in his secret lair! It does drag a good bit but when Boris is on screen this late 50s flick is must see just to enjoy Karloff just because as I give it 1 ½ stars.

Jurassic Thunder (DVD) – This 2019 film tries to be funny but fails miserably as a comic book store owner opens a one of a kind comic to read the tale of zombies, dinosaurs, and the military trying to stop WWIII from happening. A dictator in Africa has unleashed something horrible on the world and the U.S. and Russia don’t want to use nukes so let’s use commando dinosaurs. Sounds like it could be a lot of fun but instead is a lot of jokes falling flat and bad CGI that makes Asylum look like they make “JAWS” every time out as I give this turd 0 stars.

Any comments please send to grossmoviereview@verizon.net or www.facebook.com/grossmoviereviews .

Plus you can always go to the greatest T-shirt place online or if you are in Texas visit the store of “Fast Custom Shirts” where T-shirt Joe is the only place you should purchase your horror T-shirts: Go to www.fastcustomshirts.com and support!

See Yinz There! I will have books and movies for sale!

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Cinema Wasteland and The Cinema Wasteland Film Appreciation Society Presents:

A ONE DAY COLLECTABLE SHOW and RETRO MOVIE NIGHT DOUBLE FEATURE!



Saturday, June 4th, 2022

At our usual haunt: Which is now a BEST WESTERN PLUS (Formerly The Holiday Inn we’ve always held our shows at.)
15471 Royalton Rd., Strongsville, OH. 44136

This will be our Only one-day show and film night of 2022.

It’s a One Day Collectable Show featuring approximately 35 tables of Movie Collectibles, DVD and Blu-ray, Movie Posters, Autographs, and More from 10:00am until 5:00pm.

Then, catch Two Classic (or not-so-classic, as the case may be) Drive-In Movies on 16mm Film. Complete with a Cartoon, Short Film and Original Intermission Reel beginning at 7:30pm.

Make an Entire Day and night out of it!
Come in during the day to hang out with friends.
Do a little browsing and shopping with our Vendors.
* Grab a bite to eat and a couple of drinks at the hotel bar (or nearby restaurant) and return in the evening to watch the films.

* The Hotel will have a concession stand open from 11am – 4pm, then Vinney’s Bar will open at 4pm with food and drinks available.
Food and drinks are allowed in the Movie screenings.

The Film Show if Free if you attend during the day, so your Admission gets you into both events all day and night!


Our Saturday Night Film Screenings will Include:

A “Damsels in Distress” Double Feature –

ISLAND OF LOST WOMEN (1959) While flying to an international news conference in Melbourne, radio commentator Mark Bradley (Jeff Richards) and his pilot, Joe Walker (John Smith), are forced to crash land on an uncharted island in the Pacific Ocean after they run into a storm. They find this island is inhabited by Dr. Paul Lujan (Alan Napier) and his three beautiful daughters: Venus (Venetia Stevenson), Mercuria (June Blair), and Urana (Diane Jergens). Lujan, a nuclear scientist, has fled here with his family to escape from the civilized world after seeing the the power of the nuclear bomb. He doesn’t want his two visitors to leave, lest they reveal his whereabouts, so he destroys their plane. With help from the two older daughters, however, the men begin to construct a raft. (Naturally, Mark and Venus have fallen in love as have Joe and Mercuria). A fire in Lujan’s solar furnace causes an explosion which nearly wrecks the island and attracts the attention of a search plane. Mark, Joe, and the three young women look forward to being rescued; Lujan has doubts but is resigned.

And…

OPERATION DAMES (1959) During the Korean War, a troupe of traveling USO entertainers (including Russ Meyer’s buxom blond wife, Eve Myer, along with Barbara Skyler, Cindy Girard, and Alice Allyn) find themselves trapped behind enemy lines when their South Korean escorts are killed. Now, chased by the enemy, they run into a lost patrol of US soldiers, join forces, and make a desperate attempt to cross the lines and meet the US army on the other side. Mindless drive-in fun with the Hollywood hills passed off as Korea and some stock footage tossed in for good measure.

Plus…

WASTELAND INTERMISSION REEL – A terrific 22 minute reel of classic trailers, shorts, and drive-in intermission bits will screen between feature films.

And of Course a Cartoon and a Couple of Shorts…

A BROKEN LEGHORN (1959) Down on the farm, an egg in slow-witted hen Miss Prissy’s nest hatches, and out pops a baby rooster. Fearing he will be replaced by the kid and sent off to be slaughtered, Foghorn Leghorn plots to do away with the little tyke before that can happen.

THE THREE STOOGES (1953) “UP IN DAISY’S PENTHOUSE” – The Stooges father (played by Shemp) strikes it rich in oil and immediately issues divorce papers to his wife. He plans to marry Daisy, a gold digging younger women unless the boys can disrupt the proceedings. It’s a remake of THREE DUMB CLUCKS (1937) with Shemp replacing Curly and actually one of the better Stooge Shorts.

THE LITTLE RASCALS / OUR GANG (1930) “DIVOT DIGGERS” – When the caddies at the local golf course go on strike, the gang (and their mischievous chimpanzee) step in to cause chaos in one of the funniest Our gang shorts made.


WHEN:
Saturday June 4th, 2022.
10am – 5pm and movies start at 7:30pm


WHERE:
Best Western Plus (formally the Holiday Inn) – Same Place as Always just the name has changed
15471 Royalton Rd.
Strongsville, OH. 44136

* This is the same hotel we hold our Cinema Wasteland Movie and Memorabilia Expo’s in twice a year.
We’re just taking over one large room (in the back) for this event and not the entire hotel.


ADMISSION:

Admission is only $5.00
There will be no advance ticket sales for this event.

VENDORS:
Found a bunch of unwanted stuff cluttering the attic or basement? Got something to sell?
Tables for the One-Day Show are open to anyone and everyone.
If you’d like to give the smaller one-day collectable show a try, then this is a great way to make a few bucks between the regular Cinema Wasteland Movie and Memorabilia Shows.

Tables are nice and affordable and available now.

Gross Movie Reviews #571

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Gross Movie Reviews #571

The Hunger (DVD) – This 1983 vampire flick that stars David Bowie, Susan Sarandon, and Cliff DeYoung has always intrigue me…Mainly because I had seen it on cable TV way back in the early days of cable and completely forgot about it because I was a kid. This movie never impacted me like “The Monster Squad” or a “Halloween” even but I finally felt it was time to revisit this film and it is either ahead of its time or quite misunderstood since I don’t hear many horror movie fans bring this one up? Anyway, Miriam and John (David Bowie) are lovers and Miriam has lived many centuries and when she has had enough of her lover they tend to age and die quickly. John becomes very concerned feeling their love is over and finds a doctor (Susan Sarandon) who has made some interesting breakthroughs? Soon the good doctor Sarah is wrapped up in some erotic weirdness and cannot decide if she is love or there believing this will further her research? The film has an erotic charm to it deserves a second look as it doesn’t play by the vampire rules we all grew up with as I give this vampire feature 3 stars. Also too if you wanna do some prep work to help get more interested into this film there is a lot of great facts about the behind the scenes stuff that made me just happy to give this a second watch.

The Sadness (Shudder) – Honestly I don’t know if more can be said about this wonderful virus infection flick from Taiwan other than it will be on my “Best of 2022 list”. The pandemic is the backdrop and the virus has yet mutated again according to background news reports that like most of us we are not paying attention. But this mutation is different as those who are sick soon go into a fit of rage, rape, murder, and even a little cannibalism. As most of the population has lost its mind two young lovers try to navigate the city to find each other again! But what separates this “The Crazies” type of film from a lot of horror films is the violence, gore, the madness ramps up as the film goes along. When one crazy thing happens, give it ten minutes and you get to see something even more nutzoid! The film was wonderful, beautiful and played just right but funny thing and this is just me nit picking at shit but I can honestly say I wanted let’s just say a little happier ending without spoiling the fun? Anyway I still give this horror flick 4 stars and must see for horror fans this year. 

Super Dark Times (DVD) – A couple teenage best friends are screwing around with each other as usual until an accident with a sword happens. Instead of reporting the accident they bury it. As the days pass the friends fall down a deep hole of darkness trying to cope and move past the accident. But there is a problem the sword is missing and now a couple more people have gone missing at school. I really like the tone of this screwed up flick because I think it hits on a very believable string of events as I give this film 3 ½ stars.

The Chain Reaction (DVD) – Another crazy Australian film from 1980 that is an environmental action/drama that stars Toecutter and Goose from “Mad Max” and watch close because Mel Gibson shows up for a quick one line. But we have an earthquake that hits an area where a toxic waste dumping plant (WALDO) has a spill where an employee is involved and taken to their infirmary. Heinrich the employee is upset because he knows the spill is horrendous and believes the public should be warned. But the corporation feels much differently about this. What the corporation doesn’t know Heinrich had been approached by an outside source explaining the dangers of a spill if it ever happens? Heinrich escapes, warns his source, and along the way finds a young vacationing couple, the Stilsons, who help take care of him. But soon WALDO’s boss Gray tracks them all down and plans silencing everyone so any info about the spill will go away. Think dramatic dangers of nuclear waste in the early 80s with some bad ass car chases as I give the film 3 stars.

Castle Falls (DVD) – Dolph Lundgren stars, directs, and produces this feature that also stars another action film favorite Scott Adkins. Castle Heights Hospital is about to be demolished in 90 minutes to make way for new condominiums but three parties in Mike, Ericson, and a gang member claiming they are owed money are about to risk their lives for a couple million dollars hidden in the structure. All three are desperate for different reasons but just like “Trespass” with Ice-T, Bill Paxton this type of film is still mindless fun for 90 minutes as I give it 3 stars.

Virus: 32 (Shudder) – A Spanish film where a mother who isn’t exactly excited to have her young daughter today has to take her along to work at an empty club she guards. After a fun quick tour the two quickly realize the world outside is changing. Virus infected people are trying to make their way into the club to kill them both. Red marks on the hands of people can help identify the infected as Iris and Tata are separated in the club and try desperately to find each other as the infected are only satisfied by violence. Enjoyed the premise of the film and liked the rules of the infected as like “The Sadness” the twist makes for good memorable horror stuff as I give this 3 ½ stars.

House on the Edge of the Park (Blu-ray) – Severin Films recently released this sleazy revenge flick with a crazy amount of extra goodies for the horror kids to filter through. The movie from 1980 begins in the city where a rich couple stops in a garage that happens to have two lunatics Alex and Ricky getting ready for a night of dancing and partying. But after fixing the couple’s car they head off with the couple to the “get together”. Once there Alex immediately sees or believes the rich douchebags are taking advantage of his buddy. So Alex allows his demented brain to take over and turn the tables on these rich folk believing they need to be taught real respect? Alex always has a plan as he slowly beats and tortures the group that even includes controlling his friend Ricky. Thus making for a great set up ending as David Hess just seems to relish the role of the sadistic Alex. I enjoyed the film for what it is and just like “Last House on the Left” I needed to take a shower after watching it. This is just another example of why we all need more David Hess in our lives as I give the film 3 stars.

Amityville Outhouse (DVD) – Just when I thought I was done I get pulled back in as entry #37 finds me through the talented filmmaker Maddie Deering and her love for independent films. This 60 minute adventure is literally a hodgepodge of an anthology where a hobo in the woods stops a man from taking a shit in a haunted outhouse! Reminder even the filmmaker of the film doesn’t want the viewer to take this dumb outhouse thing seriously. With that the crazy hobo explains the outhouse is built from lumber from Amityville or left over demolished houses, honestly does it actually matter? Then the hobo tells three stories concerning a killer panda at a party, a priest pooping out a puppet, and a mobster fighting The Meatman. The first 15 minutes were funny but by the 30 minute mark I wanted to be watching something else and should have been limited to a short film? I actually hoped for something else but 37 entries in I got this so I give it 1 star.

Any comments please send to grossmoviereview@verizon.net or www.facebook.com/grossmoviereviews .

Plus you can always go to the greatest T-shirt place online or if you are in Texas visit the store of “Fast Custom Shirts” where T-shirt Joe is the only place you should purchase your horror T-shirts: Go to www.fastcustomshirts.com and support!

Gross Movie Reviews #569

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Gross Movie Reviews #569

Zombies from Sector 9 (DVD) – A filmmaker named Rob Ceus has made this crazy Indy zombie flick out of Belgium! Anyway it is set back in 1986 where a nuclear accident has happened in Crittersville and the next day the recently deceased have become the undead. Three years have passed and Crittersville area or now called “Sector 9” is known to be the zombie outbreak area and a man known as Bookwalker roams the area but the outbreak is starting to spread beyond Sector 9. After Bookwalker loses his wife and kid this sets him on the path of destroying all zombies and vicious raiders alike in his path. The independent film with its gore-filled effects fits right in with the early works of a Todd Sheets or a J.R. Bookwalter that will make Indy fans crave to see this flick again and again. The only overall flaw of the film if I am going to point something out would be the pacing as it makes the film seem cobbled together at times but I still enjoyed as I give it 3 out of 4 stars.

The Prison Island Massacre (DVD) – What in the Rutger Hauer have I found myself watching as I have dived deeper into the “massacre” genre with this 2007 film that is also known as ‘Angel of Death 2’ and ‘Women Behind Bars 4’ among a few other titles in a foreign languages. This German film stars the effects of Olaf Ittenbach and Jess Franco’s wife as the prison warden! If anything you know are in for something alright when you get wide shots of this mysterious island and the jail cells are held together by chains and padlocks. Young women are sent to this isolated prison to be tortured, killed, or worse for the warden’s pleasure… When there isn’t some weird German porn thing going on apparently prisoners escape on a regular basis to give the film some plot? If nothing else we do get a great scene of a mercenary trying to help the women out but gets captured, then scalped for his attempt. In the end I didn’t know if I was disappointed or just happy this wasn’t full blown German porn? Watch it and you’ll understand as I give this mess 1 ½ stars.

Clown Fear (DVD) – Hey, another killer clown film at 110 F’N minutes, yes this sounds like a horrible idea. Even though it stars Sadie Katz and Sarah French that isn’t nearly enough to save this clown horror film set in Clown City, USA. A woman, Augie Duke is left at the altar in Vegas so her in her three bridesmaids jump into the car to party and breakdown near “The Clown Inn”. From there it is all jokes and fun until the “Clown Clan” show up to take care of the outsiders! See the backstory is a small town sees clowns as a religion so again why in the fuck is this stupid ass film 110 minutes long? Again independent filmmakers I love yinz all but take note yinz ain’t makin’ “Avengers: Endgame” and never will! EDIT YOUR MOVIE! I give this boring garbage 1 star.   

Shriekshow (Blu-ray) – One of the hardest working independent filmmakers around, Brad Twigg, is back with his latest project that is an anthology of sorts. It does run an hour and 45 minutes but like most of Brad’s projects he does have an actual script/story that covers the time. Intentional or unintentional I enjoyed the beginning of the film as it felt like a montage to ‘Halloween 4’. But the film is about four friends heading out on Halloween to these so-called haunted fairgrounds to investigate. Its Halloween, soon as you see these sets or fairgrounds there is a lot of people that would love to check this shit out so even if it lingering a little in the beginning horror fans will understand because of the beauty of the sets. After entering a tent the four believed was empty they are introduced to a ringmaster who has three stories to tell. All three scary stories are solid, have a little gore, well-written, and a great cast. As the stories are being told the group quickly finds out the abandoned fairgrounds are not so abandoned. Thanks to Brad for tackling a tough subject “clown horror” and not falling into dumb ass shit like most filmmakers have and giving us horror fans another Indy anthology that we will be proud to show friends as I give the film 3 out of 4 stars.

Censor (DVD) – Enid is a part of the British Censor Board in the early 80s help deciding what films get cut or downright rejected. Enid picks a part horror films constantly and now feeling even more pressure to just cut films completely her past comes back to start haunting her as Enid’s sister went missing when she was younger and never found. When the film ‘Deranged’ gets passed and public flack hits back at the censor board Enid cracks under pressure in this dream-state and goes down this wormhole of murder and mayhem! Her dark secrets are revealed about her sister in the end or were they as the film leaves it up to you the viewer what actually happened as I give this weird dreamy horror film 3 stars.

Midnight (Remake/DVD) – This Indy flick falls into the category of why? In 1982 John Russo actually made a good horror film and then made the mistake of allowing Gary Lee Vincent to update it. Now for the why: Why filmmakers do you wanna remake something that was actually good or considered good when there is so much crap out there aka “Blood Freak” that is worth remaking or at least attempting to remake? You are only setting yourself up for failure unless you have a perfect script… And in this case you didn’t have that! A young woman Nancy takes off from home after her stepfather tries to have sex with her. After a bunch of filler for the film Nancy runs into a family who kills in the name of Satan as their family believes blood gives them energy for their satanic powers. Sorry Gary I know you mean well and great friends with Russo but this was a terrible idea from beginning to end and a mistake as I give it a ½ out of 4 stars.

Bigfoot Blood Trap (DVD) – So 5 ½ minutes in and I knew I chose wrongly watching this trash as the set up for the film is creepy old dude in the woods filming two semi-ugly women in the woods who are awkwardly touching each other and then suddenly have a shotgun to shoot at Bigfoot! They take a few shots, and one of them kills Baby Bigfoot. Thank the lord Rutger Hauer I was drinking because that was the only way I was getting through this hot garbage. Meanwhile a young woman inherits the land that Bigfoot roams along with creepy old dudes with cell phones who film ugly women. Anyhow she heard the Bigfoot stories and just like most dumb white people she wants to find and capture Bigfoot. Well of course that is a terrible mistake! And next thing I know more than half of this piece of garbage is some fake doctor getting involved and using Bigfoot as an experiment to breed with human women that they kidnap. Problem with this experiment, Bigfoot hates tattoos! If this film wasn’t so poorly written and acted I would have laughed my ass off the whole time. But I just kept thinking there isn’t enough beer in my house to make me forget this mess as I give this film 0 stars.

Wyrmwood Apocalypse (On Demand) – Super disappointed with the first film as it promised “The Road Warrior meets Day of the Dead” and instead it gave me ‘meh’ so I still tried out the sequel because it’s me. Reese is a lone military man who has lived among the living dead for a long period of time and uses the zombies for fuel among other things for himself. When he isn’t doing that he captures zombies to report back to this underground bunker in hopes for a cure? One day he trips across a hybrid that he feels the bunker will definitely want for the cure. Problem arises when Reese truly doesn’t know what is going on in the underground bunker until he runs into the original hybrid. He goes AWOL and finds out he has been lied to the whole time about the cure and wants to destroy the bunker as he claims “they took his soul”. This film had much better story, pacing, interesting characters, and lots of splatter for the gorehounds as the sequel redeems the disappointment a few years ago as I give it 3 stars.

Hell Van (DVD) – Jorge Delarosa spent almost five years and $75000 putting this passion project together.  If there is anyone that is talented enough to tackle Satanic shit in independent films and not get lost a quarter of the way through, it would be the talented Jorge Delarosa. The setting is a small town called Midway, Texas where everyone knows everyone. After a suspect accused of church burnings burns a church full of kids goes on the run and commits suicide in his van bizarre events begin to happen. Anyone that approaches or is connected to this possessed van die a very horrible death and only Sheriff Redhorse can stop this madness! Mr. Delarosa doesn’t just make a typical possessed car film but tackled it to the ground with such force that the film comes off as Mr. Delarosa shows off how talented he is behind the camera in all forms. We have explosions, burning people, eyeballs being ripped out, zombies, interesting characters you care about, chaotic satanic images to help tell the story, and the music is just the icing on the cake (music is usually forgotten in Indy films not understanding it can enhance the viewing experience). If you didn’t know what I already knew you will after watching this satanic blessing of filmmaking that Mr. Delarosa is an independent filmmaking force that needs more attention. And his latest film is a wonderful blend of Satan, horror, and blood without losing its way of telling a story as I give this film 3 ½ out of 4 stars as ‘Hell Van’ will be a favorite among independent horror fans for years to come.  

The Puma Man (DVD) – The film stars Donald Pleasance in pleather controlling people with an ancient alien Aztec mask as a man named Tony Thorn comes along and is declared a god who will bring Pleasance and his pleather to his knees! But only if he puts on his Puma Man belt and turns into a generic version of ‘The Greatest American Hero’ William Katt. Super hilarious mess of a film as I give it 2 stars.

Any comments please send to grossmoviereview@verizon.net or www.facebook.com/grossmoviereviews .

Plus you can always go to the greatest T-shirt place online or if you are in Texas visit the store of “Fast Custom Shirts” where T-shirt Joe is the only place you should purchase your horror T-shirts: Go to www.fastcustomshirts.com and support!

See yinz in two weeks on May 1st… Mini-Grossfest

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See yinz in two weeks on May 1st, 10am-3pm in the back parking lot of Willow Station Bar/Restaurant. There will be parking out in front along the street (most of the public parking side lot will be taken up by vendors)

Willow Station

3841 Willow Ave.

Pittsburgh, PA 15234

Willow Station will be open for that day 11am – 4pm.

https://www.thewillowstation.com/ or Willow Station

Any questions email Tom or Tim Gross or email grossfest@gmail.com about the event.

NOW FOR OUR LIST OF VENDORS

Maddie Deering – NekroShark Films (rumors that Spirit Animal star Tom Gross will be there to sign autographs with the talented filmmaker Maddie)

Melanie Stone – Dark White Arts

Lunija Gjoni – Plastinated Heart Art

Jess Weary – Celebrations of Spirits

David Milchick – Shoggoth Suds

Kayleigh Crawford and Dan Komarek – Video Nasty Productions

House of Horror

Scott Baucan

Christian Bareford – local film festival (filmmakers you may want to talk to these people?)

Minerva’s Trinkets

Angel O’Connor and Steve McBride – artist, tattoo artist, make-up effects expert, and all around cool persons

Brillobox – Luther Ickes – filmmaker (made a Pittsburgh Bigfoot movie), bar owner of a cool hot spot that just reopened

Darcy and Keith Munden – Legacy Verse Productions

David Fairhead – Fairly Dark Productions

Daniel Boyd and Tim Gross – Drunken Yinzers Productions

And of course the guests: the people, the myth, the legends, the Grossfest lifetime achievement award winners, the most talented Pittsburgh independent film duo you can meet David and Diana Silvio of Kiss of Death Productions!

So hope to see yinz n’at on Sunday May 1st, so come on dahn to visit! (Also wanted to thank a few people recently helping to get the word out: Nathan William, Mr. DK, Kay Crawford, Bootleg Jen Gross, Maddie Deering and of course the staff at Willow Station.

Gross Movie Reviews #567

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Gross Movie Reviews #567

Terror of Disgusting Worms from Outer Space (YouTube) – An oddity S.O.V. film made in Germany … I believe? Anyway this mid-80s unknown no budget film introduce us to Mary and Larry who after a night of partying all night are ready to head home until they see something in the sky. Bored, the couple follows to where they believed it fell to Earth hoping to find a U.F.O. and find themselves at a burned out industrial area (which makes a great location for the film). Within minutes of arriving and investigating Larry is attacked by a ghoul and it’s not long before Mary is meeting the worm aliens! Lots of incoherent running around, bad effects, glad I was able to watch this as I give this oddity 1 ½ stars for the laughs.

Disgusting Space Worms Eat Everyone! (YouTube) – In 1989 apparently we got another or possible sequel (?) to the 1984 German film but I couldn’t confirm this? Anyhow this story has alien worms infecting a man’s drugs in Beverly Hills along with the alien worms constantly feasting on random people in their homes. Meanwhile there is literally some kind of nonsense plot of a private eye (Ray) who keeps crossing paths with a 80s fouled mouth young lady. Along with that incoherent nonsense we get a lot of scenes of characters running around as the aliens are there to exterminate the humans. The highlight of this whole mess is in order to defeat the worm aliens you must throw cocaine at them as the drug melts the alien ghouls. This is a weird mess of a film indeed folks but again glad I was able to watch it as it entertained me and made me laugh so for that I give it 2 stars. Also I forgot to mention there is a random giant Raid Spray Can!

Meathook Massacre IV (YouTube) – Robert Lankford returns as the Bubba character again and this entry tries to show a budget as they feature Indy film stars Drew Marvick and Brinke Stevens. Bubba is again on the move as a bunch of meathook murders of gotten the attention of authorities and local news. While on the road Bubba and mum have a small accident with a group of young people heading to Vegas for a birthday celebration. The celebration is quickly derailed when Bubba blames this group for the death of his Ma and gets some help from his extended family. Once the extended family is introduce the film becomes more about setting up the next film than telling a story of Bubba as I give this entry 1 ½ stars.

Checkered Flag or Crash (DVD) – Think ‘Cannonball Run’ but not as funny set in Manila? It is a 3-day, 1000 mile race for $50,000 to the winner and the rest of the 50 or 60 drivers split the other $50,000 and promoted by the stylish Larry Hagman. The race or movie centers on the feud of former friends Joe Don Baker and Alan Vint who use to be partners but now competitors and a reporter played by Susan Sarandon is covering it all. The film is full of stunts and car racing which is pretty much gold 70s film lovers. I liked it but didn’t love it because for me ‘Cannonball Run’ just never gets old but that is just me as I give this film 2 ½ stars.

The Cursed (DVD) – Most of the story takes place in the late 1800s where white people never learn and fuck with gypsys who had a claim before them on some farmland. Of course a lynch mob comes by and ruins all their lives but the dumb ass white people wanna know why weird evil shit starts happening to them and their kids? After all begin to have the same nightmare and a boy goes missing a pathologist John McBride comes in to investigate the missing child and quickly figures out he might be dealing with a sinister supernatural element here as no one wants to talk about what they did in order to illegally keep the land they claim. Feels like a werewolf flick but is something more, has some fun gore scenes, goes to great lengths to have that old school cursed European monster feel, but also again points out why dumb white people will never listen as I give this horror film 3 stars.

Meathook Massacre V: The Final Chapter (YouTube) – Before I even start this review you be warned there is two more sequels that come after this, more on that later… A survivor from 15 years ago Danielle Stokley has managed to move on with her name after the attack of Bubba while living under a different name. Meanwhile Bubba is still running around with a meathook in the middle of nowhere doing his thing. Danielle is tracked down by a mysterious man who also claims to be a survivor and drops some knowledge on Danielle talking about they were some government experiment with cross breeding that mutated! What I got out of that conversation was “INCEST”. The family full of killers travels from state to state to satisfy their carnal killing needs and to stay ahead of the authorities but that is about to change? So the movie really doesn’t end it basically sets up “To Be Continued…” without saying it on screen which begs the question: “How in the love of Rutger Hauer is this the Final Chapter?” Not saying but just saying… I honestly believe this is a logical question when a filmmaker is making a film that literally claims “The Final Chapter”. I am not trying to take a giant steamy morning grumpy on this film because I like where the film was going five installments in, but when you pull this dumb shit then you are just being a dick for no good reason. And do not give me the ‘Friday the 13th Part 4’ argument as I give this film zero stars for being misleading and not in a good way.

Sharks of the Corn (DVD) – Some strange shit is happening in the cornfields of Kentucky and part of it is sharks haunt a cornfield. Yes, you heard me right folks sharks haunt a cornfield and a serial killer who is obsessed with sharks believes the sharks are gods and makes sacrifices for the gods. Oh yeah there is a Bigfoot and a Bigfoot hunter running around during this whole mess as the killer believes he is fulfilling some kind of Blood Moon prophecy. With this going all on not totally sure there is a real reason the sharks are there in the cornfield other than it can spell the end of the world for all? There is a lot of filler of three ongoing movie plots here and feel if Tim Ritter would have just stuck with a parody of ‘Children of the Corn’ I think it would have been more entertaining and that is coming from a fan of Mr. Ritter’s. I will say this if there was one take away from this mess and what may have saved the film for me was the last minutes of the film made me laugh several times as I give it 1 ½ stars.

Maggots (DVD) – If I wasn’t hell bent enough on destroying my brain with Yuengling there is bad movies and this was downright unbearable at times. This 2017 film claiming it was made for $100,000 is set in Harlan County, a wooded country area where something comes crashing to Earth and unleashes mutant maggots that want humans to feast on. Fred Olen Ray I know you wrote the story for this but dude… please have some say in these projects? Of course Harlan County just happens to become a hotspot for tourists when giant bad green screened maggots are attacking! I would love to say this entertaining but even me, I felt like something was taken from me when watching this so-called film as I give it 0 stars. Sorry your jokes in the film fell horribly flat!

Mutant Vampire Zombies from the Hood! (DVD) – Not expecting much from this C. Thomas Howell project, hell was awaiting for it to be downright insulting but instead I was surprised how much fun it unfolds in being. Once you get past the opening shootout between rival gangs and two cops the film steals its idea from ‘Night of the Comet’ and does a pretty good job its low budget it has? A strange solar flare wave hits Earth and those exposed to the radiation turn into zombies or vampires or something else according to the entertaining characters we have trapped inside the lead-walled medical facility. Understanding they must survive and put racial issues aside the gangs and white cop (C. Thomas Howell) must learn to adapt quickly as all cars do not work and the zombies are evolving. The characters were entertaining as hell for what looks like a low grade cheeseball flick at first glance and will surprise you how entertaining this film actually is? This horror film has its flaws but believe me horror fans this film does deserve your attention if you do not take the title too seriously. If you liked ‘Leprechaun in the Hood’ you will like this as I give it 2 ½ stars.

Exorcist Vengeance (On Demand) – They are trying to use Robert Bronzi aka Bootleg Bronson in every genre humanly possible and I love it. So grab the beer and donuts as Bootleg Bronson this time around stars as Father Jozsef (had to look up the correct spelling) who is called in to investigate unholy symbols. The Bishop is sent pictures of some unholy symbols on the floor of a donor of the church and believes there is exorcism that needs to be done so send in the big gun to investigate? Father Jozsef shows up to the home to investigate and do a typical exorcism but runs into obstacles because in order to finish what he started, he must unravel the mystery of the family itself which has set them on the path of the devil. Once the secret is out it is just this evil force vs. the good father himself who of course carries a gun because he is Bootleg Bronson and for that I give 2 ½ stars.

Any comments please send to grossmoviereview@verizon.net or www.facebook.com/grossmoviereviews .

You can find all of my books at www.lulu.com just search for Gross Movie Reviews or Tim Gross there!

Plus you can always go to the greatest T-shirt place online or if you are in Texas visit the store of “Fast Custom Shirts” where T-shirt Joe is the only place you should purchase your horror T-shirts: Go to www.fastcustomshirts.com and support!

Gross Movie Reviews #566

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Gross Movie Reviews #566

Deadheading (DVD) – This recent release out of the U.K. should have been called “Dead on Arrival” as this was one of the worst films I have sat through in 2022. But anyhow kids Anna, a tired flight attendant that has the all high and mighty attitude hooks up with a hot dude in her hotel mess in London. You know how it goes: she’s married, better than everyone, how could anyone even think of another then after a couple of drinks and conversation they are bumping like bunnies! Problem, Anna wakes up in a pool of his blood and instead of calling police she decides how can I get rid of this body and go back to work? Most of the film is all about Anna trying to figure out how she is getting away with the murder… Ugh this was a borefest as I give it zip stars!

Killer Tattooist (Blu-ray) – This recent U.K. film is also known in some parts ‘Skinned’ and was a pleasant surprise about a serial killer. Nathan is a very professional tattoo artist who enjoys his work and loves to kill. Meanwhile a strung out cop named Eva is brought in by superiors to look into these nine women who have been murdered the past three months. What connects all of them is the females were recently tattooed or had appointments to be tattooed and Eva for being an utter mess of an officer does wonderful undercover work. Eva and Nathan meet up at a tattoo festival and the relationship quickly evolves from there. Eva unaware of Nathan’s extra circular activity soon becomes suspicious as she gets pressure from her superiors to bring him in for questioning. Surprisingly this film gives off a “Hannibal TV series” vibe that will suck you into what is Nathan going to do next? I would have loved to say this movie was perfect but the lazy ending in my opinion was what hurt it, but don’t let that turn you off from this solid horror film that I give 3 stars.

Zombie Shark (DVD) – Honestly, I thought I seen all the SyFy Channel shark films but apparently I am wrong and blame this on talented Indy filmmaker Maddie Deering as she always keeps me in the loop. But all seriousness folks this was bad! Four people head to Red Plum Island for a weekend of fun until they come across a supposedly dead shark on the beach. But it is undead and eats the hot dude that got them to the beach. Meanwhile, Sgt. Cage aka Jeremy London is trying to track down the undead experiment shark that has caused this big mess and he is carrying a rocket launcher. Usually I absolutely love watching these films but this seem to be bad all around. The only redeemable thing that came out of the film is the quote: “people on the island are going to be a zombie shark buffet”, outside of that no wonder this slipped under my radar as it gets zero stars.

Visions of Fear (DVD) – A collection of seven short films hosted by Tiffany Shepis in 2007 or 2008. 1st film – My Skin – An old creepy dude takes care of a husband’s business for him. 2nd film – Slumber – A reporter named Jason, starts working on a gruesome story that makes him to have horrible visions that are physically changing him. 3rd film – What Ever Happened to the Zombie Killers – Zombies are just trying to enjoy their drinking and dancing at their favorite nightclub until some Goth girls known as the “Zombie Killers” show up to be bathed in gore. 4th film – Callous Sentiment – A local park that sucks in the vulnerable with acts of violence. 5th film – Trick or Treat! – A young woman makes the mistake of allowing a trick or treater into her home who just wants candy but she doesn’t have any? 6th film – Hooligan’s Valley – An offbeat short where a clown and his Mexican wrestler partner go to rescue his girlfriend at a seedy nightclub. 7th and final shirt film – Scream for Me – This is an uncomfortable adventure into a man looking for a woman to scream for his pleasure but she refuses. But he has the tables turned on him but not in the manner you think happen? A fun collection of short films that many horror fans would enjoy but the sixth short film just doesn’t fit the vibe or the buildup (intentional or not) to the last short film introduced by the very talented Tiffany Shepis as I give the collection 3 stars.

Escape from Deathblock 13 (DVD) – If it isn’t ‘massacre’ films, post-apocalyptic flicks, or Amityville movies you know I love me some Bootleg Chuck Bronson films! Robert Bronzi aka fake Charles Bronson plays Mick Kovacs who shows up at a recycling warehouse demanding his brother’s death benefit payment. After a scuffle Bootleg Chuck Bronson gets arrested and is given an opportunity to work the inside for the police but chooses not to for now because he believes he is innocent. Now sitting in prison to rot bootleg Bronson aka Mick is forced to make friends and act in some bad prison scenes. But Mick accidentally comes across some evidence to connect the warden, the prison, and the recycling warehouse all in a drug smuggling ring and he wants out. So some inmates gather to help Mick out by starting a riot so he can escape through the legendary tunnels under the old ass prison so he can go get his revenge and then be offered a job by the U.S. government! Yes it is an action movie mess but I cannot get enough of Bootleg Bronson as I give this flick 2 ½ stars.

Game of Death (DVD) – Here is a horror movie I thought I would see more people talk about? A group of young people hanging by the pool one day doing the usual: drugs, drinking, getting sexed up, AND NO ONE ON A CELL PHONE (no kidding on that last part, maybe that is why this horror film got buried? Reality check people). While let’s just say a young lady is enjoying her boyfriend as he has a good meal she sees a board game called “Game of Death”. To play the rules are simple: Kill or be killed… so of course they play. Now they either need to kill each other, 24 other people, or watch their heads explode because they refuse to participate and they could win… maybe? Weird, gory, keeps it simple, just surprised not hearing horror fans enjoying this as I believe it is worth at least one watch as I give it 2 ½ stars.

Alien from the Deep (DVD) – An Eye-talian/Philippines flick from 1989 starring Charles Napier as a hard ass military dude who has taken over a radioactivity dumping operation on an unknown island. Two Greenpeace people show up to look into the illegal dumping by the power plant only to their horror to find they are just throwing the radioactivity into a volcano. The Greenpeace people sneak into the facility and videotape all the dirty secrets but then it gets a little wacky for all involved when an alien drops by because its attracted to all the toxic waste. The alien is able to burn humans with its touch and seems to indestructible unless you got some random hydrogen flame thrower to burn the large lobster clawed thing! It’s terrible, it’s cheesy, and I know I will watch it again at some point in my life as I give it 2 stars.

Fangboner (Blu-ray) – Written and directed by Nathan (Amityville Vibrator) Rumler for a Rock Bottom Video Production so you are well warned what you are about to get into and if anything you will laugh a lot. After a night of blackout drinking and unprotected sex something is wrong with Dick? Dick has never felt like shit this much before but that doesn’t stop him from visiting his next hook up with the girl he cannot remember her name (Suzy by the way but not that important). The problem reveals itself before and after Dick hooks up with Suzy as Dick’s prior hook up is an alien that bit his dick! Dick convinces Suzy that it must be a form of vampirism that will make them thirst for blood, sex, and uncomfortable conversations in the woods. While they try plan their feedings, weird sex blood sucking rituals, the alien must retrieve the couple and end their lives before they infect the whole human race. The movie is hilariously uncomfortable and I enjoyed it all. ‘Fangboner’ has its flaws, but for no budget and just a cool crew of people having fun makes this one of those flicks you need a room full of friends, beer, and some pizza as I give it 3 out of 4 stars.

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