What better way to celebrate Free Comic Book Day than it being my birthday also!!!

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The Geekadrome : Games and Comics

534 Brookline Blvd, Pittsburgh, Pennsylvania 15226

 

 

This Free Comic Book Day will also mark out 11th year in Brookline and we want to celebrate that with a sale to coincide with our Free Comic Book Day.

What’s Free Comic Book Day?
FCBD is a celebration of comics, art, and reading where we purchase a selection of comics to give away for free during the event. as well have special exclusive Funko Pop figures that can only be purchased at the event.

What’s going to be on sale?
All kinds of things are going to be on sale, t-shirts will be $10, we will have a special sale table filled with action figures, collectibles and more all half off or more, and of course comics!

Anything else?
YES! We will be giving away some unique collectible merchandise TBA and each purchase gets you an entry to win one, Winners won’t need to be present but will need to pick them up.

Can I take Free Comics for my friend?
No, But you should tell them about it or even bring them with you. Comics are pop culture and our culture and we love to share it, but we can’t tell if we are sharing it or if someone is just being a little greedy.

 

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Gross Movie Reviews #434

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Gross Movie Reviews #434

 

The Last Days of Livermore (DVD) – A man travels to Livermore Cemetery to confront his love. He believes it is time to move on from the relationship to other things but has second thoughts as he wants to be with her… Think of the short film as a horror love story with a splatter of gore as I give it 2 ½ out of 4 stars. The short film was shot in Livermore, Pa. and the Livermore Cemetery location look to be a wonderful spot for the film. For more details about the film go to:  www.facebook.com/The-Last-Days-of-Livermore .

Terrifier (On Demand) – A film from Damien Leone that I had been hearing things about for a couple years it seems. Well horror movie fans grab the Halloween candy and turn down the lights as there is a new fun Halloween holiday horror flick to enjoy! Art the Clown is out on the town Halloween night carrying his sack of goodies. Art not having much to say voice wise uses his actions to tell you what he is about to do. As Art wanders the streets a pretty young lady named Tara catches his eye and follows Tara and her friend Dawn into a pizza shop. Of course Dawn takes pics of her and the weird ass clown that keeps an eye on Tara for her social media page. From there it just gets creepy as hell as their car has a flat and Tara runs to a close by apartment building to use the bathroom. The fun holiday night goes to hell when Art the Clown shows up again to begin his bloody path to the girls and anyone that interferes. I love the whole thing of Art the Clown just existing and actor David Howard Thornton was perfect for the role. “Terrifier” wasn’t just entertaining but pure horror awesomeness as the film took the gore level up a notch with a great ‘death by hacksaw’ scene (poor Dawn)! The film was grim, gritty, and absolutely beautiful. Mark my words “Terrifier” will be one of the best horror films of 2018 as I give it 4 out of 4 stars.

Ayla (Vimeo/DVD) – The latest from ‘The October People’ and John Portanova is a wonderful dramatic thriller about a man who spirals out of control. Elton has always tried to hold on to his dead sister. She died when Elton and his brother were young but Elton refuses to move on. He struggles daily and when Elton and his girlfriend drive out to a house to fool around he believes he is seeing her again and again. The struggle gets worse and Elton returns to the old house like he is driven to go there and find something? Next thing you know Elton is digging under a weird tree and finds his dead sister… alive and thirty years older. Beyond happy he loses connection with his girlfriend and tries to explain to his mom and brother Ayla is back and this isn’t some fake person. While doing that apparently Ayla likes to puke fluids and be naked for most of the movie. Did Elton will this to happen? Is there life after death? Is it all just in Elton’s mind and we are along for the ride? Truly weird and bizarre tale that will make you think and want to watch it again. I enjoy what ‘The October People’ are doing as they don’t stick to a certain genre and try to give you something very different movie wise than you are use too. I give this cool weirdo flick 3 out of 4 stars. For more info on the film go to: www.theoctoberpeople.net .

 

Partners (DVD) – A 1982 supposed comedy has a straight cop and a gay cop go undercover in the gay community to solve a series of murders among gay men. Some bad jokes even in 1982 and a relationship blossoming between the two cops are the main plot points of the film. Surprisingly the cast is what kept me watching the film (Ryan O’Neal, John Hurt, James Remar, and Martin Kove). The film is watchable but it isn’t a “Cruising” as I give this forgotten comedy 1 star.

 

Bigfoot vs. D.B. Cooper (DVD) – Once again I am watching stuff I couldn’t make up if I tried unless I was David DeCoteau? A pretty boring film full of shirtless hunks, it’s November 1971 and supposedly in the woods turkey hunting in the state of Washington. A man named Bernie now older tells a story of how and why he knows the real story of D.B. Cooper. There is a reason the authorities have never found D.B. Cooper and it’s all because of Bigfoot. And Bigfoot is a Peeping Tom apparently? Weird shit so of course I watched it as I give it a half star only for having voiceover work done by Eric Roberts and Linnea Quigley.

 

The Plague (DVD) – A small community called Love Canal in Canada has been used a toxic dumping ground for years. But the dumping ground hasn’t only been used for toxic materials as bodies have been dumped there also. But the dead are beginning to rise and forces a brother and sister out for a jog to team up with a couple criminals to survive the onslaught of zombies that are attacking. The group tries to use their cars to escape but that makes little difference as the numbers of undead begin to rise. Another independent zombie film that doesn’t exactly separate itself from the growing number of other Indy zombie films out there. They all have ‘good concepts’ but just don’t find a way to pull it off. I give the film 1 ½ out of 4 stars and you can find more out at www.foxtrotprodfilms.com .

 

The Plague 2: Biohazard Blood (DVD) – Two survivors from the first film, Becky and Jill are roaming the wasteland as the plague spread quickly through the cities and world. The world fell apart quickly as the Love Canal incident turned into full fledge zombie apocalypse. Or the filmmaker just has watched too much of “The Walking Dead”? As Becky and Jill see signs for salvation and travel to the destination until they cross a father whose child was taken from him because they escaped the sanctuary. Becky and Jill choose to help and rescue the daughter and disband this so-called sanctuary. The sequel seem to be less bloody, boring, and a “Walking Dead” clone done very cheaply as I give it 1 out of 4 stars. You can find out more about flick at www.foxtrotprodfilms.com .

 

Les Paterson Saves the World (VHS/YouTube) – A bumbling idiot that is the Australian diplomat farts while on stage during a conference and catches another diplomat on fire. As punishment he is sent to the Middle East as a favor so he could be tortured and killed. But being a complete idiot and totally unaware he escapes and helps a Russian plot to proceed. The Russian plot is a Bio-weapon of super herpes via toilet seats being placed in the Pentagon so it could infect all Americans. The diabolical plan can only be stopped by the bumbling idiot or the U.S. president Joan Rivers to give up one squillion dollars for the antidote. The 1987 film has its moments that include Hugh Keays-Byrne in leather and Barry Humphries also starring as a woman who works for the C.I.A. trying to defuse the situation. A weird comedy that I know I didn’t get all of the humor but was just glad to watch something a little different than the usual so I give it 2 stars.

 

Rise of the Footsoldier (DVD) – The film is based on a true life tough guy named Carlton Leach who rose through the ranks of feared criminals. His main business was violence and crime during the 80s and 90s. If someone needed protected, drugs sold, guns, someone beaten up? Carlton and his boys were the ones to contact if you had the cash. Leach made a living off of this for many years until some peers of his were killed in a vicious shooting that one of his friends said they were retiring. The UK accent is very thick in this film where they should have had some subtitles at times but if you are a fan of mob flicks this might be something up your alley? I give the movie 2 stars.

 

The Sisterhood (DVD) – Another Philippines post-apocalyptic flick produced from the Roger Corman Company that is about women with special powers after the nuclear holocaust. The year is 2021 and a woman and her village have just been raided by some raiders and her brother was killed. Two women warriors from a group “The Sisterhood” come by and help the young lady. The warriors of The Sisterhood are considered outcasts or witches and decide they will help track down the raiders that did this horrible deed. The female warriors believe in freedom and will put an end to the men’s’ terror with or without the help of the war wagon they find. Quite a fun post-apocalyptic B-movie that doesn’t look like it has much going for it and for that I give it 2 stars.

 

Any comments or questions please send to grossmoviereview@verizon.netor www.facebook.com/grossmoviereviews . Remember folks always support your local independent movie theater, independent video store, and independent filmmakers! It will keep horror alive………

Don’t forget you can also hear Kyle Poling and me talking about horror flicks on a weekly basis on the Bloodbaths and Boomsticks podcast at: www.bloodbathspodcast.blogspot.com/ also available at http://www.stitcher.com/podcast/kyle-poling-2/bloodbaths-and-boomsticks?refid=stpr

 

Plus you can always go to the greatest T-shirt place online or if you are in Texas visit the store of “Fast Custom Shirts” where T-shirt Joe is the only place you should purchase your horror T-shirts: Go to www.fastcustomshirts.com for details.

 

See yinz at GROSSFEST! July 28, 2018! Go check out www.grossfest.com for all the details! 

Gross Movie Reviews #433

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Gross Movie Reviews #433

 

Black Water (DVD) – We have a killer action flick on a super-secret sub starring Jean Claude Van Damme, Dolph Lundgren, and Patrick Kilpatrick. JCVD is Wheeler who gets caught up in a double cross over a thumb-drive that has secrets that can be sold worldwide. Patrick Kilpatrick is the man who has brought him in and transporting him on a C.I.A. black ops sub that doesn’t exist. Wheeler’s neighboring cellmate just happens to be a German named Marco played by Dolph who cannot be killed because he knows too much and may be to high profile? When things get double-crossed again and no one to trust as people are being killed on the sub Wheeler turns to Marco for help. The movie plays out like “Under Siege” on a sub which isn’t a bad thing. The film is a lot of fun especially because of the Marco character but just feel more could have been done with this action flick. It’s good but not great and potential to be great as I give it 2 ½ stars.

 

Blood Moon (VHS) – An Australian slasher film from 1990 about an all-girls Catholic high school and its students being stalked and killed by an unknown killer. When a girl and her boyfriend disappear no one blinks an eye except for her best friend who feels something could be going on? But honestly she isn’t too worried as she goes to a dance and meets a dreamy dude who snuck into their dance. Soon more girls disappear and the police begin snooping around a creepy Science teacher who he and his wife have a secret? This flick is your scraping the barrel kind of slasher film that doesn’t have much substance. Remember its 1990 so I am sure this was made on mostly on the cheap. I give it 1 ½ stars.

 

The Raiders of Atlantis (DVD) – Hey remember that “Cannibal Holocaust” Deodato dude? Well he made a bunch of other movies for those who may not know. And this gem is a wonderful must-see mess! Released in 1983 under the title “Atlantis Interceptors” in some countries takes “The Road Warrior” rip-off to a whole other off the wall level. Off the coast of Florida some scientists have found an artifact at the bottom of the ocean that proves the existence of Atlantis. They are going to try and move a sunken Russian sub to investigate more. When moved, the sea floor opens, a tidal wave destroys the scientific ocean platform, and a biker gang led by ‘fish bowl man’ begins murdering people on the mainland. The “Atlantis Interceptors” are back to take the mainland from these dumb humans! Never mind asking why they have customized motorcycles with swords on them and cars with guns on them? Just except this mess of a plot hole and thank me later for enjoying a great post-apocalyptic movie about two dudes trying to save the world by flying into Atlantis and fucking shit up! I give it 3 ½ stars.

 

Kindergarten Cop 2 (DVD) – So twenty some years later they decided to make a sequel with Dolph Lundgren. Dolph is a F.B.I. agent who goes undercover to question six year olds about a flash drive their old teacher may have hidden? The drive has all the identities of everyone in witness protection. Of course hijinks ensue but not nearly as funny as the original from 1990 starring Arnold. But it had Dolph so I know I am in it for at least one watch as I give it 1 ½ stars.

Welcome to Willits (DVD) – This odd horror flick was a very nice little surprise from 2016. A girl (Anastasia Baranova from “Z Nation”) home from college in her little Northern California town has an uncle and aunt that have a huge weed crop they protect. Her uncle believes aliens are trying to steal his crop and do weird shit to him. This all started when he substituted something in his batch of meth not too long ago and his visions of aliens and a Dolph Lundgren cop show ‘Fists of Justice’ continue to get worse. What doesn’t help is some campers are staying nearby and stumble upon the crop and war is declared as the uncle believes he is killing aliens. This flick is a funny and unexpected gore fest! To give an extra twist is Rory Culkin who shows up as the weird hitchhiker picked up by the campers to give it that extra creep but fun horror factor. Movie fans this is well worth tracking down as I give it 3 stars.

 

In the Name of the King 2: Two Worlds (DVD) – Since I have seen one and three it was only fair I eventually checked out the Uwe Boll sequel starring Dolph Lundgren. Dolph is Granger in present day. Granger gets pulled into a time warp which takes him to a distant time where he is called “The Chosen One”. He is deceived into thinking he must go up a mountain and kill the ‘Holy Mother’ who leads the ‘Dark Ones’. But he finds out the truth from the Holy Mother that he is placed into the future as an orphan to potentially return and save them all from the evil king who has deceived all who follow him. Granger’s future world depends on him stopping the king’s evil plan of a plague. Apparently they ran out of Jason Statham money and Uwe Boll had a leftover script from his “House of the Dead” projects and you have this… I give the fantasy flick 1 star.

 

4 Got 10 (DVD) – Dolph Lundgren, Danny Trejo, and Michael Pare are all wrapped up together in this tale of a man who forgets who he is and has a van full of drugs and money. As the man tries to remember what happened, a crooked cop kills the wrong partner and a DEA agent and a drug lord have questions. Your typical direct-to-HULU/NETFLIX jams for weirdoes like me who believe those three names are always gold for action flicks. Or at least worth one watch as I give it 2 stars.

 

Children of the Corn: Runaway (DVD) – So John Gulager needed a paycheck so “hey we need someone to direct the ninth entry into this useless series only Tim Gross watches?” A woman named Ruth is trying to escape her past with a cult that killed all their parents over a decade ago. She left when pregnant so her son would have a chance in the normal world. Of course evil has followed her and wants her son. The film isn’t terrible but if you are having trouble sleeping this might help you as I give it 1 star.

 

Hellraiser: Judgment (DVD) – Of course this tenth entry sucked a huge double bag of dicks! Think remake of the fifth entry “Inferno”? If you remotely know what I am talking about please turn away and don’t watch because it will make you feel stupid and angry. For the love of DOUG BRADLEY, $350,000 budget! Thank you Dimension Films for releasing another hot pile donkey shit into the world and just insulting horror movie fans, Clive Barker, and humans in general. Worst movie of 2018! Wait question what is worse? Jeepers Creepers 3 or this entry into the so-called Hellraiser series? Hold on I think I need to go drown myself in the tub while I slit my wrists at the same time. Crap film gets crap move on folks.

Surviving Evil (DVD) – So Billy Zane plays an adventure dude who does a survival show for a cable channel. Zane and his crew head to a supposedly haunted island in the Philippines to shoot their latest episode of the TV show. One of the crew knows of the legends on the island but is choosing to ignore them as he has other motives of why he is there. This crew member knows of Japanese gold that is hidden on the island and is willing to risk his friends and his own life for the payoff. But the legend becomes real when shape-shifting tribe of demons show up and sniff out one of the crew is pregnant. Apparently pregnant women to these cool demons are Yuengling to me? The movie has some great build up, Billy Zane being Billy Zane, lots of gore, and really interesting demon things! This pleasant horror film feels like a really awesome SyFy Channel film that was too awesome to be on the “Sharknado” network. This film gets 3 really kick ass demon stars.

 

Kickboxer: Retaliation (DVD) – In case you haven’t had your fill of these movies JCVD’s character Durand is blinded by a fight promoter and must help Kurt Sloane train again. But this isn’t any ordinary fight as the fight promoter is Christopher Lambert and he is a ruthless rich bastard that wants Sloan to fight a chemically enhanced fighter. So Lambert kidnaps Sloan’s wife and gets Sloan arrested and thrown into a Bangkok prison. There Sloan trains with Mike Tyson and JCVD now that he has no choice to defend his title. If you are an action film fan this will be your bonerjam or your Viagra until they give us another Jason Statham action flick? Really enjoying JCVD doing another one of these as I give it 3 stars and yes Mike Tyson still looks scary even when he is acting.

 

Dune Warriors (DVD) – A post-apocalyptic B-movie mess from 1990, the Corman group producing, and stars David Carradine. A small village is being taken over by some warlords for their water. A woman in the village has had enough and goes out to hire five warriors to help defend the village. If you like watching dumb ass shit like me you’ll enjoy it. Let’s just say it isn’t “Deathsport” or “Battletruck”. I give it barely one Carradine as he was barely there for the paycheck.

 

Lunatics: A Love Story (DVD) – This oddity is truly a love story that stars Ted Raimi as Hank, who is a writer and has not left his apartment in six months. A huge part of it is he keeps having delusions of spiders and a doctor (Bruce Campbell) trying to cut him or give him a shot. His life changes when he believes he is calling a dating line and it happens to be a pay phone. The phone is picked up by Deborah Foreman’s character Nancy, who believes she is a jinx. She just got done getting thrown out of her hotel room, dumped by her boyfriend, and shot a gang member in the foot. On a whim Nancy accepts Hank’s invite to his apartment. Nancy tries to look past all the foil and Hank’s weirdness and they connect for their love of poetry. But Nancy believing she is a jinx runs away only to force Hank to overcome his fear of leaving the apartment to go get the girl. Josh Becker put together a hilarious tale with a great cast that I believe the studios were unsure of how to advertise. When someone brings up you should watch a love story with them go with this flick as I give it 3 ½ stars and you won’t be disappointed or bored.

 

Nightflyers (VHS) – I keep getting this confused with the Stephen Machet flick with killer bats. But this is the 1987 space flick starring Catherine Mary Stewart who is a part of a crew that gets on a ship that might be alive? They are off on a mission and become more curious as they never meet the captain and the Class 10 telepath on board keeps warning them bad shit is going to happen to them. The ship computer controls everything including her son Royd who must have seen “The Last Starfighter” and “Night of the Comet” and realizes how hot Ms. Stewart is and begins to converse with her. Some boring space shit happens, then the ship tries to kill them all, and we get a scene where the telepath gets his face cut in half by a laser “Intruder-style”. Outside of the really cool death by laser scene; the movie seems to suffer several things including many rewrites most likely. But hey it is being remade into a TV show so there is that as I give this flick 1 ½ stars.

 

Argoman: The Fantastic Superman (YouTube) – Oh the shit I couldn’t make up? Sir Reginald Hoover is Argoman. An Italian Batman clone who believes saving the world and keeping peace. But also he loses his powers for six hours if he bangs hot women of 1967. Argoman’s nemesis Jenabell is busy stealing a crown and forcing France to give her all their money. When that isn’t going on Sir Reginald is busy boning Jenabell and will capture her when the time is right. The rest of the movie is Argoman escaping custody and just seeing what else he can do for fun with his amazing powers. The movie doesn’t a whole lick of sense but I was entertained and laughed several times and for that I give it 2 stars.

 

Any comments or questions please send to grossmoviereview@verizon.netor www.facebook.com/grossmoviereviews . Remember folks always support your local independent movie theater, independent video store, and independent filmmakers! It will keep horror alive………

Don’t forget you can also hear Kyle Poling and me talking about horror flicks on a weekly basis on the Bloodbaths and Boomsticks podcast at: www.bloodbathspodcast.blogspot.com/ also available at http://www.stitcher.com/podcast/kyle-poling-2/bloodbaths-and-boomsticks?refid=stpr

 

Plus you can always go to the greatest T-shirt place online or if you are in Texas visit the store of “Fast Custom Shirts” where T-shirt Joe is the only place you should purchase your horror T-shirts: Go to www.fastcustomshirts.com for details.

 

See yinz at GROSSFEST! July 28, 2018! Go check out www.grossfest.com for all the details! 

Gross Movie Reviews #430

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Gross Movie Reviews #430

 

Gnome Alone (DVD) – A wonderful B-movie starring Vern Troyer as an “evil gnome” who is part of a curse and a mark that has been passed down through several generations. You wish for someone to be horribly disfigured this ugly gnome goes and takes care of it. When an old bag lady is run down by a drunken frat boy Zoe a store clerk has the mark/evil gnome passed on to her. Wanting revenge and police not helping people that were involved with the accident and the cover up begin to die and Zoe is the one to blame. It’s hilarious and corny and well worth curiosity as I give the pint-sized horror flick 2 ½ stars.

 

The Traveler (DVD) – So this movie from filmmaker Jonathan R. Skocik came to me in the mail the other day. Never mind it surprised me but it was an independent film I pooped all over back in 2006. So I took it as a sign that it was time to rewatch this Indy film and give it another chance. It is supposedly an all-new director’s cut of the film being released. Can’t hurt… But for those who don’t know the film it centers on a couple who have car troubles and find themselves at the ‘death house’ looking for help? But a few other people are already there to hang and do graffiti. To their surprise a stranger shows up explaining the only way to leave the house is to be the only one left. Each time he shows up they must vote on who dies. Of course their deaths are not swift but very torturous. As usual not my cup of tea or Indy flick but I can say this isn’t the worst movie I have seen as I said in 2006 as other horrible films have been released since: “The Christmas Season Massacre” being one of them. The acting isn’t terrible, some of the effects are good, but in the end I still don’t like the film too much. But hey people go check it out and you decide if I am right as you can find out more about the movie and the filmmaker at: www.facebook.com/BlackBootProductions .

 

The Lonely Ones (DVD) – A group of young friends head to a cabin to party and tell scary stories to each other. Some strange creatures or I should say ghouls show up to crash the party. Sounds like a fun horror film but fails as the film is a bit dull. It wastes a lot of time setting up the story between a cheating boyfriend and the girl he is trying to get back with. The ghoul idea and the weird biker dude is interesting but again the whole relationship thing drags this horror to a slow haul. For that I can only give this flick about ghouls 1 star.

Robowar (DVD-R) – Oh Vincent Dawn aka Bruno Mattei I so enjoy the messes you call movies. Don’t walk but run to your computer for this 1988 gem as Mr. Dawn pretty much made a scene for scene ‘Predator’ rip-off. Yeah, it’s not as good as that great flick with Arnold but this stars a racist robot! A strike force is sent into the jungle on a secret mission where they are to face-off with a robotics experiment gone wrong. Omega One is the robot’s name and looks like a cross between Charlie Sheen’s suit from “The Wraith” and a suit they may have stolen from Full Moon’s “Mandroid”. When Omega One isn’t destroying the strike force its busy wandering the jungle repeating, “Greasy” the whole time. A big flaming piece crap? Yes it is! Will I watch it again? Damn right I will as I give it 3 stars just because I am still laughing.

 

Pulse (DVD) – Little Joey Lawrence goes to visit his dad in California for the summer. Only problem Joey wasn’t there to be haunted by a smart pulse of electricity trying to kill him and move on to the next house. Joey spends much of the movie trying to convince his father and other people it’s real until some major accidents happen. Then we have one last showdown between the pulse of electricity and the tag team of Joey and his father. If you are a fan of TV horror movies you will enjoy this as I give it 2 ½ stars.

 

Axe Massacre (DVD) – A holiday horror short film where a masked Santa Claus climbs down the chimney unannounced to slaughter a family on the holy night. Fun stuff and looks cool but why did he do it and why the mask? I give this short film 1 ½ stars.

 

Machete Maidens Unleashed (DVD) – An amazing documentary that features what it was like to shoot and produce films in the 60s, 70s, and early 80s in the Philippines. Sets were built for you, labor was cheap, no laws enforced there, and Roger Corman took full advantage of this situation to produce many films and start several careers. A good portion of the documentary deals with the actresses of this time, one of them being Pam Grier who also took full advantage of the opportunity. Lots of Sid Haig and they explain why the age of filming in the Philippines went away. I give this excellent piece of history 4 stars.

 

Trailer War (DVD) – This collection of trailers really centers on some unknowns and B-movies favorites that feature Craig Sheffer, David Carradine, Donald Pleasence, Henry Silva, Hal Holbrook. This collection digs deep in the vault for films like: Inframan, The Dungeon Master, World War of Kung Fu, The Man From Hong Kong, Force: Five, Maniac Cop 2, Partners, Nightmare Honeymoon, The Scaremaker, and Shoot. If you got two hours to kill and enjoy watching trailers this is the DVD for you as I give it 3 stars.

 

Any comments or questions please send to grossmoviereview@verizon.netor www.facebook.com/grossmoviereviews . Remember folks always support your local independent movie theater, independent video store, and independent filmmakers! It will keep horror alive………

Don’t forget you can also hear Kyle Poling and me talking about horror flicks on a weekly basis on the Bloodbaths and Boomsticks podcast at: www.bloodbathspodcast.blogspot.com/ also available at http://www.stitcher.com/podcast/kyle-poling-2/bloodbaths-and-boomsticks?refid=stpr

 

Plus you can always go to the greatest T-shirt place online or if you are in Texas visit the store of “Fast Custom Shirts” where T-shirt Joe is the only place you should purchase your horror T-shirts: Go to www.fastcustomshirts.com for details.

 

Oh it’s real and it’s happening… GROSSFEST! July 28, 2018! Go check out www.grossfest.com for all the details! 

Gross Movie Reviews #429

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Gross Movie Reviews #429

 

Vengeance Runs Red (Vimeo) – A short film from filmmaker Philip Brocklehurst that tells the story of two who men who are haunted by a past mistake. A young dude takes upon himself to serve justice that is due. I give it 2 ½ out of 4 stars. Want to find out more go here: www.facebook.com/philip.brocklehurst.9

 

War of the Dead (DVD) – The film isn’t horrible but it’s not great either. The film is just another run of the mill Nazi zombie flick that isn’t very memorable. Sorry horror folk no “Outpost”, “Dead Snow”, or “Frankenstein’s Army” here. Just keep moving along as I give this flick 1 ½ stars.

 

The Rezort (DVD) – Another fun take on the zombie genre from the UK I believe? Ten years has passed since some worldwide virus turns millions of humans into zombies. The antidote was introduced to everywhere except one island. This island has now become a ‘Jurassic Park’ of zombies where some big corporation got the idea of if you got the money they have the zombies to shoot and kill. But no one thinks how are they resupplying the stock of zombies? The story mainly revolves a woman whose father was killed during riots when the zombie virus first started to spread. She believes going to this island will get her over her nightmares and fears? Once there she has faced her fears but wasn’t counting on the zombies getting loose in the park and begin feasting on all vacationing there. Now, she and a small group of others have five hours to get off the island before the military levels the island! A wildly entertaining zombie flick folks as I give it 3 ½ stars.

 

Nemesis 3: Time Lapse (VHS) – I got bored and decided to fall down the Albert Pyun wormhole again and watched these not needed sci-fi sequels that feature Tim Thomerson and Sue Price. In this mid-90s sequel Sue Price is searching out and destroying cyborgs as Tim Thomerson keeps a watchful eye over her for Central Command. Central Command wants her alive at all costs. Really folks not a whole lot happens in this flick but if you are a Tim Thomerson fan I totally get why you would track this bad boy down as I give it 1 ½ stars. The film also is known as “Nemesis 3: Prey Harder”.

 

Nemesis 4: Cry of Angels (VHS) – Albert Pyun brings back Sue Price one more time for what I like to call “Nemesis 4: Sue Price Bangs all the Cyborgs”. Never mind Andrew Divoff’s head speaks about cyborg non-sense throughout the movie. Sue Price’s goal in 2080 apparently is to be naked and bump uglies with all the cyborgs and then kill them. I believe the alternative title to this flick was actually “Hardbodies 3”? But that couldn’t be confirmed or denied at this time. But the gist of the flick this time around is Price’s character fucked up at some point and now there are Hunters all over her naked muscle bound ass! It wasn’t a great flick but it was a hell of a lot more interesting than the last sequel where she sat in a desert for about 75% of the damn movie. I give the flick 2 stars and you may also find this movie under the title “Death Angel” in some countries…

Swiss Army Man (DVD) – Possibly the most bizarre, completely entertaining, and glorious film you will ever watch in your life. I do not say that lightly. Daniel Radcliffe said it best on a late night talk show, “It’s a film about farting, erections, and a dead guy.” If you do not find that funny: one, this isn’t the film for you and two, you are most likely dead inside? The film begins with a young man played Paul Dano who is trapped on a small island trying to hang himself until he sees a dead body wash up on shore. Its Manny aka Daniel Radcliffe and once he begins farting Dano’s character rides him across the water to freedom and onto an adventure that will blow your mind. They become friends, eat out, share stories, start fires, and fight a bear. You get the picture? If you haven’t witnessed this film yet make it so because the ending makes the movie even more bizarre and fun. I give this hilarious flick 4 stars farting all the way.

 

Avenging Force (DVD) – One of Michael Dudikoff’s better action flicks outside of the “American Ninja” saga. Dudikoff’s buddy, Steven James of course is running for senate. Until some rich white racist dudes with their leader John P. Ryan decide to kill him and his family. On top of that they make Dudikoff play “Surviving the Game” eight years before Ice-T did! This 80s action flick will satisfy your action flick hunger if needed as I give it 3 stars.

 

Love Eternal: The Silent Film Cut (YouTube) – Forte Films Entertainment as at it again flaunting their filmmaking talents with a cool throwback short film version of Dracula and Mina. Done their way they give ‘silent era film buffs’ a tasty treat. Wonderfully done this filmmaking group needs more support and money because I would love to see these guys making a couple features a year. I give this fun treat 3 out of 4 stars and you can find out more at: www.fortefilmsentertainment.com .

Explorers (DVD) – Holy crap folks I do not know how I missed this 1985 flick starring Ethan Hawke and River Phoenix. This was so in my wheelhouse. But after reading some of the info on it and how it was considered a flop maybe somehow it fell off my cable watching radar as a kid? Apparently this movie was over 3 hours long and I believe Paramount Studios were like “nope”, not happening Joe Dante. The film is reportedly unfinished but a finished product. Very strange stuff but anyway folks the story centers on Ethan Hawke who has a weird dream about aliens and an image. He draws it and shows it to his best friend who of course is the nerdy kid down the street doing experiments in his basement. Hawke’s character continues to have these weird dreams and once his two friends become a part of it and his nerdy best friend uses a computer to make a bubble they decide its plans for a spaceship. The spaceship consists of a trash can, an old carnival ride, microwave doors, and a computer in the movie that didn’t exist in reality but was built just for this movie. They fly around and fuck shit up until Dick Miller finds them and eventually go off planet to meet the aliens. Really not too much to the movie but it is a fun glorious kick in the ass of childhood if you are a 80s kid? I give the entertaining film 3 stars.

 

Any comments or questions please send to grossmoviereview@verizon.netor www.facebook.com/grossmoviereviews . Remember folks always support your local independent movie theater, independent video store, and independent filmmakers! It will keep horror alive………

Don’t forget you can also hear Kyle Poling and me talking about horror flicks on a weekly basis on the Bloodbaths and Boomsticks podcast at: www.bloodbathspodcast.blogspot.com/ also available at http://www.stitcher.com/podcast/kyle-poling-2/bloodbaths-and-boomsticks?refid=stpr

 

Plus you can always go to the greatest T-shirt place online or if you are in Texas visit the store of “Fast Custom Shirts” where T-shirt Joe is the only place you should purchase your horror T-shirts: Go to www.fastcustomshirts.com for details.

 

Oh its real and its happening… GROSSFEST! July 28, 2018! Go check out www.grossfest.com for all the details! 

Gross Movie Reviews #428

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Gross Movie Reviews #428

 

Groundhog (YouTube/DVD) – A popular news anchor for Channel 13 is in a horrible accident that kills her on the way back from a small town ‘Groundhog Day’ celebration. Her cameraman/boyfriend Logan witnesses the tragic event and has trouble forgiving the groundhog. For the past five years Logan has used drugs and therapy to help him cope with the tragedy. Logan keeps having horrific gory visions of his dead girlfriend that is beginning to drive him out of his mind. The holiday is upon us again and Logan has finally lost his shit and has made the decision to go on a killing spree all the way back to that small town. Well of course to go kill that demented groundhog that started this whole mess. Can Logan be stopped as he leaves a bloody mess all the way to the groundhog’s doorstep? First, it’s a holiday horror flick so you had me interested right away. Second, I really enjoyed James Balsamo’s cameo. Third, someone is using a NES Duck Hunt gun in a scene. Fourth, the independent film has its flaws but David McDonough and crew kept it bloody and entertaining as I give this fun holiday horror flick 3 out of 4 stars. For more about the film go check out: www.facebook.com/Boombasticfilms .

Slaughter Drive (DVD) – Ben Dietels independent film tells the story of a man named Doug who is a filmmaker. Doug gets home feeling like a failure when his last film doesn’t go over well only to be greeted by his soon-to-be ex-wife bumping uglies with another man. With things this bad Doug tries to get past his troubles and start on his next project which has him setting up his camera in the local park. While there friends convince Doug to leave the camera and go drinking with them. Some hours pass and Doug heads back only to be confronted by a stranger who says nothing and runs off. Doug comes to regret leaving his camera in the park later as this stranger maybe his new weirdo neighbor who is killing off Doug’s friends. When Doug watches the footage of what his neighbor done Doug tries his ass off to convince police and his two best friends that he is living next to a crazed killer! It is crude, hilarious, and rough around the edges kind of slasher with some excellent effects work. It also helps many Yuengling bottles make it into scenes along with someone mentioning their buckeye in conversation… I give this hilarious film 3 ½ out of 4 stars.  Find out more at www.bpofilms.bigcartel.com .

 

Star Wars: Rogue One (On Demand) – So they went and did another prequel… But a one-off no less… And it was good. Basically if you ever wondered how or who help build the Death Star and why Darth Vader started chasing Princess Leia across the universe here is your answer. It may not have that charm of the original three but this movie did give me “A New Hope”. I give it 3 stars.

 

Star Wars: The Last Jedi (Theater) – So Rey has found Luke Skywalker hoping he will save the universe? Instead he is old and still pissed that the wannabe Darth Vader kid is lame. While the First Order is destroying the Resistance, Rey learns she has abilities stronger than anybody anticipated. After believing the Jedi should just die out at last minute Luke does best “Old Ben” imitation. Just like “The Force Awakens” it’s a fun reminder what the “Star Wars” universe can be as I give it 3 stars.

 

Black Panther (Theater) – Bottom line Marvel movie fans Black Panther’s universe is much bigger than you can imagine and how much it will impact the next “Avengers” flick. For the most part this is an origin story of the character and has a kick ass villain to boot. The Black Panther isn’t all about staying hidden but believes the world needs help but first he must save his kingdom from his cousin. A cousin that was abandoned in America and not brought home after his father’s death. The film is absolutely wonderful and the landscapes are just beautiful. Marvel should be proud of the job they did with this fun film because it stands in my top five Marvel films to be rewatched over and over again. Now do me a favor and give me another damn “Blade” movie for the love of Wesley Snipes! Saying that this comic book movie is a must see as I give it 4 stars.

 

Justice League (DVD) – Once again I just feel like the DC universe rushed this story along. With Superman dead and Steppenwolf (who?) coming back to reclaim the planet Batman and Wonder Woman believe it is time to start a super team? Of course this team struggles until Superman is reborn and begins kicking ass. The movie isn’t good or bad it just exists. Now saying that again they can do no wrong with the Wonder Woman character but the film just felt forced they could have done this another way? It also feels like they tried not to fail instead of trying to take a chance with this team-up flick. Either way I will keep watching as they churn them out and just hope they do better with the Justice League world as they go on? I give the film 2 ½ stars.

 

Big Bad (DVD) – A lower budget off the radar monster flick that involves some teenagers involved with a school fundraiser that has them staying overnight at the old Marion County jail. Unbeknownst to them their teacher has decided to make them bait for a beast-like creature he has been tracking for decades. When he gets roughed up and leaves the kids for the next meal it is up to the three teenagers to escape the jail and the beast and find some help. It is a pleasant cornball-type of monster flick that I believe will appeal to most horror movie fans. Weird bloodthirsty creature, the jail being real, and teenagers making fun of each other about their cell phones or not bringing it. I love finding stuff like this as I give it 3 stars.

 

Hot T-shirts (YouTube/VHS) – A sex comedy about a guy named Joe who runs a bar that is about to go out of business??? Until, Joe decides to have a wet T-shirt contest on a nightly basis. And pretty much ¾’s of the film is wet boobs from 1980 so enjoy as I give it 2 stars. If nothing else besides boobs watch it for the hilarious bad bar fight.

Wastelander (Vimeo/DVD) – Sorry folks it’s not a documentary for one of the longest running horror movie conventions out there Cinema Wasteland. But it is still something unexpectingly cool. A post-apocalyptic flick directed by Angelo Lopes set in the distant future. A man known as ‘Wastelander’ or Rhyous is searching the wasteland for E.D.E.N. Many believe it doesn’t exist, many just want the tech, and Rhyous is searching for it for answers. With the world dying around him this quest consumes but there is others that what his attention. When Rhyous disagrees with all because they don’t info he seeks he becomes a marked man in the wastelands. The film gets bonus points for the pseudo-Interceptor that should have been used more and understanding the point of fun post-apocalyptic flicks of the past. Honestly I am surprised we haven’t had more films like this like we did in the early 80s when some nut had their finger on the button. The only thing missing that could have made this better is Fred Williamson and being made in Italy. Mr. Lopes I say, “Bravo my friend.” This film fits right in with the likes of: Future Hunters, The New Barbarians, 2019: The Fall of New York, etc. Hell I can easily see this being a SyFy Channel feature? Anyway thank you Mr. Lopes for not disappointing me as I give this cheesy post-apocalyptic film 3 out of 4 stars. For more details check out: www.facebook.com/wastelanderthemovie .

 

Any comments or questions please send to grossmoviereview@verizon.netor www.facebook.com/grossmoviereviews . Remember folks always support your local independent movie theater, independent video store, and independent filmmakers! It will keep horror alive………

Don’t forget you can also hear Kyle Poling and me talking about horror flicks on a weekly basis on the Bloodbaths and Boomsticks podcast at: www.bloodbathspodcast.blogspot.com/ also available at http://www.stitcher.com/podcast/kyle-poling-2/bloodbaths-and-boomsticks?refid=stpr

 

Plus you can always go to the greatest T-shirt place online or if you are in Texas visit the store of “Fast Custom Shirts” where T-shirt Joe is the only place you should purchase your horror T-shirts: Go to www.fastcustomshirts.com for details.

 

Independent horror fans it is coming… GROSSFEST! July 28, 2018! Go check out www.grossfest.com for all the details! 

Gross Movie Reviews #426

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Gross Movie Reviews #426

 

Mayhem (DVD) – Imagine if “The Belko Experiment” was done better with a simpler plot to it. The new virus that is affecting people around the globe is the ‘red eye virus’. This virus doesn’t kill you as it attacks your brain and makes you just not care. Some people it affects them sexually, some people it gives them angry rage, and so on. The point is this law firm with the help many people that work long and hard for the company found a way to get a man off for murder who killed a co-worker during the time he was infected with the virus. The CDC is aware of it and constantly trying to find a cure for it. But someone has put the virus into the water supply of the law firm and now it is on lockdown. Not before the dude that found the loop hole is fired and a woman his company is screwing over is supposed to be thrown out. Because of the lockdown the two decide to make a pact to make their way to the top in a gruesome, murderous, sexually charged rampage to kill the president of the company because they wouldn’t be blamed. Great concept for a film, gory as fuck, and absolutely entertaining as hell as I give it 4 stars.

 

The Mummy (DVD) – So if you get through the first 15 minutes of the film of Tom Cruise being Tom Cruise and check your brain at the door you will enjoy this flick for what it is? Now I was expecting a giant turd but it never happened. It is a cheesy, wonderful throwback idea of how to start the “Dark Universe” saga. Tom Cruise is a guy who uses the military to dig up artifacts and sell them on the black market until the 30 something cute professor gets involved and both unleash something evil that the world thousands of years ago buried. The Mummy or princess turned to the blackest of magic when her father had a son to make a pact. Now alive in present day she wants to complete the pact to bring evil upon the world and her to reign as king or queen in this case. But with the introduction of Dr. Jekyll as the Nick Fury character he has other plans. The movie is interesting enough to take a chance on and it is shameful that Universal Studios gave up so easy on this “Dark Universe” concept. Me personally I want it to happen, don’t give two shits whether Tom Cruise is involved or not as I give this flick 2 ½ stars.

 

Double Target (DVD) – Oh Bruno Mattei aka Vincent Dawn I so wanted to love your bootleg ‘Rambo 2’ 1987 flick that stars Miles o’ Keefe as bootleg Lorenzo Lamas or Bob in this case. But it gets boring pretty quick. Donald Pleasance plays a senator who wants a covert operation into Vietnam that makes sure the Vietnam and Russia aren’t planning some kind of terror attack. Bob just wants to go in rescue his son. Once you understand Mr. Pleasance was there for maybe a day of filming you lose interest in this action war flick that is a little too light on the action as I give it 1 star.

 

Jigsaw (DVD) – It has been a decade since the last Jigsaw murders and the death of Jigsaw aka Tobin Bell’s character. But a recent police chase of a two bit drug dealer to a roof reopens an investigation into the murders as apparently Jigsaw is back or so it seems? A police detective wrapped up in the investigation thinks he has the suspect knowing Jigsaw is dead but Jigsaw is always one step ahead in this prequel, sequel as usual they are still making shit up as they go! It wasn’t terrible but I think I am hung up on the fact I liked what they were starting in the last film with the victims of Jigsaw having their ‘AA’ meetings. It felt like it was setting up a slew of other Jigsaw flicks that were going to go in a different direction? I give this flick 2 stars.

 

Zombies: The Beginning (DVD) – One of the last films for Bruno Mattei aka Vincent Dawn goes back to the reimaging cookie jar one more time as he remakes “Aliens” sort of with zombies soap opera style. Armed forces are sent to an island where a zombie outbreak has been reported. Tyler Inc., has been experimenting with humans and now the island has become overrun with the undead. The Special Forces go in in hopes of rescuing the scientists but instead have to fight off hordes of flesh eaters. Not his best work in the zombie genre but you know I had to watch it as I give it 1 ½ stars.

 

Island of the Living Dead (DVD) – Vincent Dawn had one last zombie film in him before he left this great earth and horror fans. This film centers around Treasure Hunters who get stranded on an island that has the undead and a crap load of gold. About 500 years ago the Spaniards were happy and rich until a plague hit turning them all into zombies and they are controlled by a being who wants them to obey and worship it. Meanwhile the treasure hunters are risking life and limb trying to figure out how they can get the gold off the island. If there was a rave it could have been called “House of the Dead”? I give it 1 star.

 

Yellow Fangs (DVD/YouTube) – A 1990 movie directed by Sonny Chiba based on true events that happen in the mountains of Japan in the winter of 1915. A ridiculous huge bear went from village to village attacking women and dragging them deep into the snowy mountains. So of course a hunting party gets together trying to track down this murderous beast. Great killer bear flick worth tracking down that is also known as “Remains” or I like to call the film “Grizzly 3”. I give this wonderful killer bear film 3 stars.

 

Another Kind (DVD) – A few young people get together to on a trip to the mountains mid-winter to enjoy something different? After the one dude’s stuck up girlfriend leaves and the threesome see some lights at night that wake them strange things begin to happen. As they try to decide whether to hike back or press on they get lost and weird things keep happening. Think “Blair Witch” in the winter with aliens. I give this bare bones film 1 ½ stars.

 

Blade Runner 2049 (DVD) – The sequel picks up 30 years later after the first film’s events where the Tyrell Corp., bankrupt and was bought out by the Wallace Corp. They continue to make replicants but have learned from their mistakes and still hope for them to take over the human population. A Blade Runner comes across a typical non-violent replicant that as long lived longer than he should but something is different and this Blade Runner has found evidence of something that is linked to the legendary Officer Deckard. Deckard mysteriously disappeared 30 years ago and leads this new Blade Runner down a worm hole of something that could change the world or possibly put it into complete chaos! Again visually beautiful like the first film but can be a little boring but for me this film came about 20 years to late as I give it 2 stars.

Skip Trace (Blu-ray) – Jackie Chan is Bennie a lifelong cop for the Hong Kong police who has no family except a girl who is the daughter of his former partner that he swore he would watch over. Johnny Knoxville is a lifetime hustler/gambler/con man who gets mixed up with the Chinese mob when he sees a murder and has “the Matador’s” phone. On top of that the Russian mob is looking for him as he knocked up the main man’s only daughter. It is up to Bennie to get Connor Watts back from Russia over the China border to testify and put this notorious mob to rest. Jackie is getting a little older but that doesn’t stop him from doing a crapload of entertaining stunts and Knoxville being the perfect sidekick for Jackie. I really would like to see a few more movies with these two together as I believe they have some untapped chemistry? I give this entertaining as usual Jackie Chan film 3 stars.

 

Any comments or questions please send to grossmoviereview@verizon.netor www.facebook.com/grossmoviereviews . Remember folks always support your local independent movie theater, independent video store, and independent filmmakers! It will keep horror alive………

Don’t forget you can also hear Kyle Poling and me talking about horror flicks on a weekly basis on the Bloodbaths and Boomsticks podcast at: www.bloodbathspodcast.blogspot.com/ also available at http://www.stitcher.com/podcast/kyle-poling-2/bloodbaths-and-boomsticks?refid=stpr

Plus you can always go to the greatest T-shirt place online or if you are in Texas visit the store of “Fast Custom Shirts” where T-shirt Joe is the only place you should purchase your horror T-shirts: Go to www.fastcustomshirts.com for details.

Independent horror fans it is coming… GROSSFEST! July 28, 2018! Go check out www.grossfest.com for all the details! 

 

Gross Movie Reviews #425

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Gross Movie Reviews #425

 

Dire Wolf (DVD) – If by some chance you do not this more recent film from Fred Olen Ray it is also known as “Dino Wolf”. I could not confirm if this was a ‘SyFy Channel Original’ but either way it found me to watch as usual. Maxwell Caulfield stars as a by-the-book small town sheriff that has to figure out why the military left their bootleg experimental “Project Metalbeast” out? As it slowly tears through the locals in the woods Caulfield and others have to figure out how to destroy this thing before it destroys all of them. If you are a Fred fan its worth tracking down the low budget flick, if not you most likely will be bored and wanna move on as I give it 2 stars.

 

Damned by Dawn (DVD) –  A very slow British film about a Banshee haunting a family after they move into a home and a woman keeps having weird ass dreams about the Banshee. It was boring poo so move on… I give it a ½ star.

Daisy Derkins vs. The Bloodthirsty Beast of Barren Pines! (DVD/Vimeo) – Mark Mackner is back with his sequel to the misadventures of Daisy Derkins. This time out Daisy is out hitchhiking out in the woods only to be picked up by an unknown punk band whose car breaks down immediately. So as they venture out in the woods to get help Daisy faces many challenges as she must fight criminals, cannibals, and the punk band themselves and eventually a dinosaur! No shit folks the dinosaur looks like they stole it straight out of a Polonia Brothers film made before 1996? If that wasn’t enough to entice the hardcore Indy film viewer, Daisy uses a plastic sheriff badge as a throwing star to defend herself at one point. For that I am thankful for as Mr. Mackner continues to have fun with the character he created named Daisy Derkins. There is already a third Daisy Derkins film in the plans. I give this tale 2 ½ out of 4 stars.

 

Goon: Last of the Enforcers (DVD) – Doug Glatt is back as the minor league hockey goon that plays all out for his team. But Doug is getting older and now about to become a father which has him thinking it might be time to get a real grownup job. Especially after his last fight did not go as well as the Highlanders hockey team’s owner son who plays for another team destroys Doug. This gives Doug time to reflect and ponder if he can do anything else? If anything he heads to a fighting on ice bout with his best friend and sees a familiar face that helps set Doug straight on what he should do with his hockey life… A very good sequel that was no way going to be better than the original we got a few years back. Instead of trying of trying to top it, everyone involved played it smart and gave us an entertaining film about Doug evolving with his teammates and hockey. Another damn good hockey flick that you need to add to the list as I give it 3 ½ stars.

 

Me and My Mates vs. The Zombie Apocalypse (DVD) – Two friends are trapped at a telephone exchange building when the zombie apocalypse hits Australia. Not sure what to do next with their unique situation they become concerned with the lack of beer they may have until another friend and his daughter show up. Now that they have beer, the conversation turns to should they venture out to fight or just stay to come up with a better plan? While bickering they believe it’s a good idea to get the military involved since they would come and save them? Even when that goes wrong and the zombies actually learning how to get past their blockades it’s time to make a run for the truck and get out. Plus this film sets a new precedent for symptoms of a zombie virus as you are infected if you have purple spots on your beanbag! I give the humorous Australian flick 3 stars.

The Shape of Water (Theater) – An amazing creature love story set in the 50s. A mute woman works as a janitor with her best friend at a classified facility that has just gotten a new addition. This new exciting addition happens to be a creature that lives in the water and was worshipped as a god in South America. The military is very interested, the Russians are interested but not that interested, but this mute woman forms a relationship with the creature. She feels exactly like the creature and has finally someone that understands her. Forming this bond with the creature by eating lunch with him every day, a scientist who happens to be Russian posing as an American sees this amazing experience as something that needs to be researched. Russia does not feel the same way and the Americans are just looking for the next dog to send to space as the “Great Space Race” has begun. The janitors with the help of a friend and the scientist sneak the creature out and into the mute woman’s apartment. This is just temporary until they can release the creature when the rains come. During that time the woman and the creature’s relationship becomes that much bigger and find it difficult to part from each other when its time. The movie is absolutely amazing looking and gonna be one of the best films of 2018 as I give it 4 stars.

 

Brawl in Cell Block 99 (DVD) – Vince Vaughn plays a character most movie viewers are not use too as he is a man who has just been laid off and found his wife has been cheating on him. After taking out his anger on the wife’s car they have a conversation about trying to have a kid again and about going to be a drug runner to make the bills. 18 months go by and the couples’ are doing well with a child on the way. But Vaughn’s character is forced to work with a couple outsiders as he makes a compromise so he can have time off with his wife and newborn. Things go bad and real bad as the cops have a shootout Vaughn’s new associates. After the smoke clears Vaughn’s character is facing seven years of prison until Udo Kier shows up to inform him his wife was kidnapped. If he does not find a way to go kill another inmate at a maximum security prison his newborn will chopped to pieces and sent to him. So the chaos begins as Vaughn’s character fights, scratches, and destroys his way through prison in order for his wife and newborn to be taken care of. A well-produced film that went on a limb having Vince Vaughn casted in the main bad dude role that pays off big time. I give the solid flick 3 stars.

 

Any comments or questions please send to grossmoviereview@verizon.netor www.facebook.com/grossmoviereviews . Remember folks always support your local independent movie theater, independent video store, and independent filmmakers! It will keep horror alive………

Don’t forget you can also hear Kyle Poling and me talking about horror flicks on a weekly basis on the Bloodbaths and Boomsticks podcast at: www.bloodbathspodcast.blogspot.com/ also available at http://www.stitcher.com/podcast/kyle-poling-2/bloodbaths-and-boomsticks?refid=stpr

Plus you can always go to the greatest T-shirt place online or if you are in Texas visit the store of “Fast Custom Shirts” where T-shirt Joe is the only place you should purchase your horror T-shirts: Go to www.fastcustomshirts.com for details.

Independent horror fans it is coming… GROSSFEST! July 28, 2018! Go check out www.grossfest.com for all the details! 

Gross Movie Reviews #424

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Gross Movie Reviews #424

 

The Lost Tribe (DVD) – A scientific group is sent to a small island where it is believed lost natives still live there cut off from the rest of the world. The point is explore and prove that the missing link does exist as its worth millions. But things change when Lance Henriksen shows up to take the evidence and kill anyone there. Things get even more ut of control when a small boat shipwrecks on the island and finds whats left of base camp. Blood, broken shit everywhere and the shipwrecked people feel like they are not alone. They are not as these lost natives still live and like to hunt humans! The box art looks kinda like a ‘Predator’ rip-off but still cool, the story sounds good, but when watching it just seems the movie got too much going on when it should have just focused on the tribe. I give this flick 2 stars.

 

Lovelace (DVD) – A film that documents or reacts the rise and fall of the woman known as Linda Lovelace. Anybody over the age of 30 knows the name or has at least googled it, or even stumbled upon her work at some point. The young woman basically change the porn industry as her film “Deep Throat” brought porn into the mainstream. The porn she starred in played in many mainstream theaters and was a milestone for the business in the 70s. That was only part of the story as Ms. Lovelace spent the rest of her life trying to not be a part of the business that used her to grow it worldwide. After an abusive husband and a bad time of seeing the shitfest the porn business could be at the time she just wanted a normal life and move on. A great film that gives you the inside stuff on what really happened throughout her life as she said, “She was only in the business for 17 days.” I give the flick 3 stars.

 

Operation: Endgame (DVD) – A well produced under the radar action/comedy about the changing of the president from Bush to Obama as the back drop. The two branches of the secret government in their underground lair go ape shit on each other when their secret lair goes on lockdown. No escape as they are about to be purged unless they find out who killed their superior. It is a comedy but there is some really surprising brutal fight scenes and a bit of gore. And the cast isn’t your no name just starting in the business type of cast, this film has some vets that I will not name just so you go watch this very amazing movie. This is a treat we old people would find from time to time in the video store during the days of straight-to-video. Snowed in, rainy day, calling off work cause they suck a bag of dicks, then look for this flick as I give it 3 1/2 stars.

 

Dark Skies (DVD) – This film is like a lost episode of “The X-files” staring Kerri Russell (I don’t know why but she always bothers me ever since showing up on the WB network) and also could be compared to if smashed the films “Paranormal Activity” and “Signs” together? I don’t know if that works for you but Kerri and family keep having strange shit happen to them. They are a well to do family that suddenly has like something randomly coming through the back door at night, setting up puzzles and art work with their chairs and plates, making signs that they are aliens… Being rich white people they do not know how to deal with it until they are accused of child abuse and go visit the crazy dude aka J.K. Simmons and explains aliens are fucking with them. The movie is interesting but yet boring at times too. Different cast or maybe better different pacing of the film could have made this a better watch because the material is there. I give it 2 stars.

 

No One Lives (DVD) – Oh for the love of Rutger Hauer this was such a pleasant surprise. We have a family of criminals who look for small time heists, people to screw over, cons, etc. Their last job goes bad when they had to kill the people that lived at the house they were robbing early. Upset, they hit the bar and find a normal looking couple that looks like they have money? The innocent couple is moving and just wants left alone but of course that cannot happen. The couple gets taken on a dimly lit road and the criminals believe they got a score that will make up for the last one that went wrong. Things go sideways when the woman of the couple slices her own throat on a knife and they break into the gentlemen’s car only to find a blonde woman tied up in the trunk. Things go to even weirder when they learn this normal looking man is a crazed and beyond smart serial killer that is upset his trophy has been killed. Chaos ensues as the criminals now become the hunted in their own home. Brutal and beautiful at the same time as I give it 3 1/2 stars.

 

The Machine (DVD) – Its the future and a very bright doctor named Vincent McCarthy is doing research and trying to develop A.I. that will like a human. Lots of tries but it always thinks like a computer. He wants it to be logical. He dreams of a cyborg of sorts that you cannot tell the difference. But also too he is trying make a program, a chip, or parts that would form with the human brain, arm, leg to become one with them. The good doctor is trying this on war vets that have no hope of brain function or missing limbs and no where else to turn. Of course the government that is funding the project wants it as a weapon. The government’s goal is to defeat China in this not too distant future. While looking for an assistant or testing them Dr. McCarthy finds Ava, a woman who has a program of her own that is fond of the good doctor and how he treats the program as an equal. When the higher ups feel Ava and Vincent are getting to close they kill Ava. Dr. McCarthy knows this and builds a prototype robot with Ava in mind. From there the film gets very interesting as it does not take the usual twists you would expect. Enjoyable flick that may explain this reality is not as far away as we common people think as I give it 3 1/2 stars.

 

It Stains the Sands Red (DVD) – A different kind of zombie flick where a woman forms a relationship with a random zombie out in the desert. When her and the boyfriend get stuck in the sand on the side of the highway they are attacked by a lone zombie. Before I go on I must explain the film opens up with the zombie apocalypse hitting in Vegas and these two are trying to make it to an air field to fly to Mexico! Once the boyfriend is bitten and the woman travels into the desert she spends most of the movie roaming the desert and talking to this lone zombie that keeps shambling along to her. The film goes on a bit long but I did enjoy the story of the relationship that is formed between the woman and the zombie. I give it 2 1/2 stars.

 

Zombie Massacre 2: Reich of the Dead (DVD) – The zombie flick should have been called the “Reich of poop” as the movie was not much about anything. Mainly about a team of soldiers trapped in a building by Nazi zombie experiments. Not really worth your time zombie fans and go back and watch “Frankenstein’s Army” you will thank me later as I give this 0 stars.

 

Master of the Drunken Fist: Beggar So (DVD) – A story about a rich kid ‘So Chan’ who has everything but also is a great fighter. But when the these fighters get together in front of their king and he gets screwed over he wants to get back at them after he is forced to be nothing. He gets together with a rogue settlement of people who believe in equality and drunken boxing or fighting. He learns this skill so he get his revenge. Cool action flick but without Jackie Chan the movie just seems like it is missing something the whole time you are viewing it. I give it 2 stars.

Brutal Relax (Vimeo) – From the makers of one of the best films of 2017 “Fist of Jesus” in my mind that I watched, comes this beautiful gem! A man is told by his doctor he needs to relax so this man heads to the beach in his white underwear, sits on the beach, and listens to music. He loves it, he is relaxing… Then ugly creatures come from the sea and begin a brutal bloody gore filled massacre on the beach. Our main character still sits blissfully unaware of whats going on as people are running for their lives and being ripped a aprt and feasted on! The creatures luck changes for the bad when the man’s music stops and he stands up in a fit of rage and takes it out on the creatures. Once again brilliant, beautiful, fun, amazing, and down right entertaining. For me 2018 has started off right with this short film as I give it 4 out of 4 stars. For more details on this project and the great “Fist of Jesus” head over to http://www.fistofjesus.com .

Death Cases (DVD) – A creepy and a little sleazy flick from Russia that is hosted by a man known as the ‘Gravedigger’ takes you the viewer through real stories of death. Think of it as a another branch of the genre that has titles such as “Faces of Death”, “Necromantik”, and “Traces of Death”. The blends together brutal scenes of tapes, footage, voiceovers, and pictures of different demented psychos along some of their own footage in it to connect together. Fans of Toe Tag Pictures’ “August Underground” and “The Murder Collection” may think this the lost film of Fred Vogel and company which is a good thing. Alex Wesley goes for the jugular again in his latest project that will find an audience that will be foaming at the mouth to watch over and over again as I give it 3 out of 4 stars.

 

Any comments or questions please send to grossmoviereview@verizon.netor www.facebook.com/grossmoviereviews . Remember folks always support your local independent movie theater, independent video store, and independent filmmakers! It will keep horror alive………

Don’t forget you can also hear Kyle Poling and me talking about horror flicks on a weekly basis on the Bloodbaths and Boomsticks podcast at: www.bloodbathspodcast.blogspot.com/ also available at http://www.stitcher.com/podcast/kyle-poling-2/bloodbaths-and-boomsticks?refid=stpr

Plus you can always go to the greatest T-shirt place online or if you are in Texas visit the store of “Fast Custom Shirts” where T-shirt Joe is the only place you should purchase your horror T-shirts: Go to www.fastcustomshirts.com for details.

Independent horror fans it is coming… GROSSFEST! July 28, 2018! Go check out http://www.grossfest.com for all the details!

Gross Movie Reviews #423

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Gross Movie Reviews #423

Invasion of the Mindbenders (VHS) – A lower budgeted teen comedy from the likes of a producer from “Spookies”. Her name is Genie Joesph and from the stories we have heard over the years from cast members and crew of “Spookies” she was not well liked. But apparently not too long after being on set of my favorite 80s horror movies she set forth to do this weirdo comedy where the backdrop is a high school of unruly students are ruining the school. Or at least according to the principal and its all beacuse of that damn rock-n-roll. In steps in Dr. Gunbow and his experimental sounds that make even the toughest students into straight A students in mere days. With the principal desperate and tired of our two main characters Crash and Frankie he allows the experiment to happen one day in detention. Anyone that listens mellows out and becomes the perfect student except for Crash and Frankie as they have headphones. Once there is no more rukus in the school Crash and Frankie become suspicous, grab their nerd friend and investigate. Meanwhile the principal likes the results and wants to speed up the results which causes literally a GLOW wrestling match to break out in the high school salon. The B-grade film has its hilarious moments and is worth watching for two reasons: one if you are a “Spookies” fan this gives you some random weird triva to what happened to one of the producers. And second we get the great quote from Crash and Frankie when asked what can be done to change the students back to normal, “My first idea was to have everyone jerk off!” Might not be the best high school hijinks flick out there but worth the scavenger hunt if you ae a “Spookies” fan? I give it 2 stars.

Hamburger: The Motion Picture (DVD) – Possibly put out there as a sex comedy but doesn’t give you the goods nearly as much as a “Pivate School” or “Hardbodies” but that is secondary to what makes this great flick work. We are introduce to Russell, he has been kicked out four colleges now and if he doesn’t get his degree and can’t inherit $250,000. Russell constantly keeps getting busted having sex with all the hot girls. You know how we all have this problem? But anyway Russell heads down to ‘Busterburger’ for a meal (clearly making fun of McDonald’s from the opening credits and theme song) and sees there is an actual Busterburger University where you can get a degree. So after not banging the cashier he fills out his application and off to the campus Russell goes. But Russell gets some bad news as Dick Butkus is his drill instructor and has it in for Russell and his sex crazed roommate. Here at Busterburger they learn how to make burgers, keep the customer happy, how to say “put that cookie down mother fucker”, and become the best employee possible. Completely ridiculous and hilarious with the film’s climax being when a bus full of fat people showing up to eat at the Busterburger test site, with the bikers following, then the cops. Of course the movie is dated and if you are over 25 you won’t get most of what is going on? But this is a great look into what people thought of McDonald’s in the mid-80s and the film has possibly the random but funniest characters to attend a burger coolege… I give this beautiful film 3 stars.

The Foreigner (DVD) – Possibly one of the most underrated flicks of 2017 I did not see coming. Jackie Chan is driving his daughter to a shop to pick up her dress. He has a slight car accident out front when a bomb goes off inside the dress shop killing his daughter and several others. From here you are expecting Jackie Chan to go all Jackie Chan but he doesn’t. Jackie just wants answers! Meanwhile Pierce Bronson is Irish dude who is in with the British government mainly to try and keep the peace between the Irish extremists lets say and the Brits? For most of the movie you are not totally sure if Pierce’s asshole charcter is behind the bombing or just trying distance himself from it as he was one of these extremists 30 years ago. But Jackie wants answers and everyday sits in this lobby waiting. When he doesn’t get the answers he wants and no one has been found that did the bombings Jackie begins to stalk Pierce’s character. And again you are expecting the wild acting, stunts, and so on but his character being 60 years old gives up his restaurant and starts a one man crusade of just fucking people up! Think “Taken” but if possible done in a better way? It can be debated whether this is a better version of “Taken” just for the mere reason Jackie Chan goes away from what he is known for and becomes possibly a bigger bad ass than he ever was with this hardcore action/drama flick. Kudos to Jackie Chan because I did not see such a flick coming this late in his career as I give it 3 1/2 stars.

Insomniac (Vimeo) – A thriller that runs a little over 30 minutes about a man named Roger who has sleeping issues. Like a lot of people with a sleep condition it can really fuck with your perception of reality. Roger keeps getting these weird visions from time to time that makes him call this doctor he found on a busines card named Dr. Pleasance. Roger goes to see him and gets this new experimental drug from Dr. Pleasance. But the good doctor has some underlying thoughts behind why he gives Roger the experimental drug? The drug doesn’t help Roger as much as intensify his odd visions that get more and more bizarre. A dark trip into an injuried mind from filmmaker Mathew Fisher as I give it 3 out 4 stars. Catch up with the people behind the film at: http://www.facebook.com/BoomBasticFilms .

Death Racers (DVD) – Its 2033, and some dumb ass built a jail on top of a water treament plant where Raven from ECW aka Scott Levy aka The Reaper is the lord there. He plans on releasing a toxin into the water supply killing everyone in the whole state. So the state governor has a race, a “DEATH RACE” to have four teams race to capture or kill The Reaper before he contaminates the water supply. Oh yeah two reasons your ass will watch this shitty trainwreck and laugh like I did: First, most of the car chases and kills are filmed in Asylum Entertainment’s parking lot. And second, Insane Clown Posse is one of the four teams! 1 star for complete crap and 3 stars for making me laugh my ass off for over 80 minutes.

Wonder Woman (DVD) – Even though it was a prequel and didn’t have any interest seeing it in the theater I did still wanted to see it. And I was right… It’s the one thing DC cannot fuck up in their movie universe. The casting of the Wonder Woman character, the origin story, not playing down the importance of the character in the superhero world, all great stuff for popcorn movie goers. This movie explains how this young woman leaves her Amazonian land to help a man and his friends to stop a diaster that is about to happen at the end of WWI. And find and destroy Aries. DC Universe gimme a sequel because I am too hungover for wasting my time explaining why this film should have been introduced before “Batman vs Superman”? Go watch this great film again as I give 3 1/2 stars.

Death Race 2 (DVD) – Since I gave the remake another chance I thought it was time to watch the sequels to the remakes which are actually prequels… WTF? Luke Goss is this no nonsense bad dude who works for great character actor Sean Bean. A bank robbery goes horribly wrong and Goss’s character is sent to jail but not any jail a place that is for the worst of the worst. A former Miss Universe has come up with an idea for not just a news story but a TV show for Ving Rhames and his studios that are floundering. Miss Universe controls the ‘fight to the death’ matches inside and puts them on live TV. Meanwhile, Bean’s character puts out a hit on Goss wanting him dead. Once the ratings go down for the death matches, “Death Race” is born where Goss can flourish with the help of Danny Trejo. Goss’s character gets into a horrible crash where he burns alive and we get a “Too be continued” after everyone involved basically dies or you believes die. The movie is watchable as I give it 2 stars.

Death Race 3: Inferno (DVD) – This flick continues the storyline where e see not only the ‘Death Race’ is born but the ‘Frankenstein’ character is born. But someone likes this idea of the ‘Death Race’ and wants to make it global. And he wants all the characters to race in I believe Africa? Baha Racing… I can’t remember but they are in some remote area of the world. But the point is Danny Trejo, Luke Goss, and others come up with an idea to not only break out, but to make it look like they died, and create another ‘Frankenstein’ for the race so the race can keep living. Again this was watchable but was actually looking to see a true sequel but believe that crap called “Death Race 2050” may have killed anything of the sorts. So if needed just go back and watch “Deathsport” with David Carradine, old you would as I give this 2 stars.

DJ Stan Da Man (YouTube/DVD) – Stan is a guy who believes he is the best DJ in town for the wedding/party world. Stan believes he knows what is best for every party he is working at. But what makes this film work is the cast of supporting characters Stan works with and sometimes fights with. They are not just throw away characters but interesting supporting characters that are well written as they have their own little subplots. This helps take the viewer through the highs and lows of Stan’s life. DJ Stan believes he is an untouchable person in his line of work until he is finally fired. But as always our titled character finds a way to survive. This independent film isn’t the usual stuff I watch but always cool to watch something out of my comfort zone worth watching. The film proves that Mr. Fisher is willing to take a chance on a film that doesn’t fit a genre but also is able to craft interesting characters with their own subplots. This is a prime example of an independent feature that I would throw out there in conversation for movie viewers looking for something non-horror as I give this 2 1/2 out of 4 stars. Plus I believe this is the first film I have watched outside of “The Wedding Singer” that takes you on the inside of the DJ/wedding/party world. Catch up with the people behind the film at: http://www.facebook.com/BoomBasticFilms .

Dogged (Vimeo/DVD) – The film revolves around a college kid named Sam who comes back home for a funeral. Sam is from an island community where not many leave and stay their whole lives. From the beginning when Sam is back everyone seems to have their own little secret or secrets. Rachel the pastor’s daughter is a little upset that Sam left in the first place. But also Rachel needs to tell Sam something but they keep being interupted. As weird things keep happening and the pastor’s actions keep geting weirder by the minute the pastor wants to assure Sam its in his best interest to stay away from Rachel. If that wasn’t enough Sam’s parents missed the tide and cannot get back to the island the next day but want Sam to still go to the local festival the pastor holds. Eventually Sam finds himself out in the woods and finds some strange cult shit going down. Before Sam can do anything about it Father David has Sam and Rachel tied up and about to be murdered for some offering. The film has this weird cool “Wicker Man” maybe even “The Devil’s Rain” vibe to it but believe some editing of the two hour movie could help give it a little more creepier vibe. Father David keeps the creepiness going throughout but I feel like we could have had a couple more scenes of Sam’s father total weirdness explained. Overall an enertaining story driven cult film that will find its audience. Me personally I would like it shorter but that can debated. I give the UK flick 2 1/2 out of 4 stars.

The Belko Experiment (DVD) – A well crafted film about mostly US workers in another country working at the Belko Compnay that could be or not be a government experiment. Just another typical day at work until all the locals are sent home or stayed home supposedly for a soccer game? Then a voice comes over the speakers saying you have 30 minutes to kill someone and these steel walls seal up the building. When people don’t listen they start blowing people’s heads off from the tracking devices inside their heads. After so much time goes by a certain amount of people must be killed if not everyone basically dies. So of course everyone turns on each other and it becoming a huge slaughter. Great gory flick, but this is a beauitful reminder to the folks out there this is happening! We are being tracked constantly and this will or already has happened somewhere. Because its in the water man and don’t forget those weirdos getting the chip place in their hand so they can pay for groceries without their wallet! I might be crazy but this film only feeds into what I believe goes on behind closed doors with the dark side of our own government and those 1%… Oh yeah I give this 3 stars.

Any comments or questions please send to grossmoviereview@verizon.netor www.facebook.com/grossmoviereviews . Remember folks always support your local independent movie theater, independent video store, and independent filmmakers! It will keep horror alive………
Don’t forget you can also hear Kyle Poling and me talking about horror flicks on a weekly basis on the Bloodbaths and Boomsticks podcast at: www.bloodbathspodcast.blogspot.com/ also available at http://www.stitcher.com/podcast/kyle-poling-2/bloodbaths-and-boomsticks?refid=stpr
Plus you can always go to the greatest T-shirt place online or if you are in Texas visit the store of “Fast Custom Shirts” where T-shirt Joe is the only place you should purchase your horror T-shirts: Go to www.fastcustomshirts.com for details.
Independent horror fans it is coming… GROSSFEST! July 28, 2018! Go check out http://www.grossfest.com for all the details!