Gross Movie Reviews #443

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Gross Movie Reviews #443

 

The Tripods (VHS) – This made-for-TV flick was a BBC production made in the year 1984 and some would say even has some kind the film has some kind of cult status? But anyway this 2 ½ hour film is set in July 2089 outside of London where mankind has been long invaded by alien machines. People have accepted this and live in peace and actually worship the machines and have somewhat gone back to the old days of living before technology. But there are a few people or vagrants that have refused the “capped” process and live scattered among the mountains to evade capture by the alien machines. Since the machines have arrived, war has been non-existent, and the people willingly give their children at the age of 16 to the machines to be “capped”. The machines take them in and basically tattoo their skulls or doing god only knows to their brains. So two teenagers meet this vagrant and decide they don’t want to be “capped” or questioning authority and runaway to the mountains to escape believing there is more to life than these alien machines. The project is very British so for me a little bit was lost in translation but is an interesting project and worth the watch if you love sci-fi flicks as I give it 2 stars. Random fact the TV movie premiered here in the U.S. in the mid-80s on PBS.

Nightfall (VHS) – A 1999 independent vampire flick that had distribution through Troma that was set in Seattle, Washington. A F.B.I. agent named Jack Talbot is investigating a string of murders that have the victims bloodless and marks on their necks and believing there is a serial killer in the city. But Talbot’s partner is killed during the investigation and he begins to believe this vampire theory to the point he chases the vampire to a different city. Talbot teams up with a couple of local detectives who are already on the case of similar victims to try to kill this vampire. I can understand why Troma picked up this flick: nice amount of blood, the acting isn’t terrible, and the story is pretty solid. I give it 2 stars.

Jack Be Nimble (VHS) – This is a story of two kids, Jack and Dora who live in New Zealand and were given up for adoption but separated for the adoption. Jack went to a weird, backwoods; abusive family and Dora went to a nice couple and grew up without issues until high school. Now teenagers they both are having issues and try to explore this possible psychic link in finding each other? Dora gets picked on because of this obsession so she kicks some major ass at school and begins her search for Jack. Where Jack gets down right crazy and dark and hypnotizes his family to kill his parents to escape into the countryside looking for Dora. A really weird and violent flick from the country down under but it makes for an enjoyable watch. Plus you get to see Alexis Arquette in an early role as I give it 2 stars.

 

Big Legend (On Demand) – Tyler and his soon to be wife head out to the remote woods to spend time together and so Tyler can propose to his girl. But it is interrupted by a very large hairy creature that drags her away and leaves him a mess as she disappeared. Twelve months go by and we see Tyler leaving an asylum where he was placed as many thought he was crazy and try to get him to understand it was most likely a grizzly bear attack. Once out and some advice from his mother he heads to the woods armed to the teeth wanting answers. While there he is attacked by this large thing again but it goes away and Tyler meets a new friend who tells him a story or two and talks about a private company owns the woods. This private company knows about the thing in the woods and he has also been looking for it but only has heard sounds and stories until today. Eventually Tyler has a bloody battle with thing/bigfoot/creature and survives. The film ends with having a conversation with Lance Henriksen setting up an “Avengers vs. Bigfoot” sequel or at least I hope that is what it’s for?  Also look for cameos by Amanda Wyss playing Tyler’s therapist and Adrienne Barbeau playing Tyler’s mother as I give it 3 stars.

 

The Domestics (On Demand) – The film is set in a post-apocalyptic world where the government may have hit the reset button by dropping black poison on all its citizens one random day. Those who were immune or survived are faced with fighting for their lives day in and out if you are anywhere near the major highways or roads. These are the areas where different gangs of “Sheets, Gamblers, cannibals, etc.” settle at looking for fresh humans for whatever means they need. We are introduced to a lovely couple who were in the process of a divorce right before all this shit went down and just trying to survive like everyone else. The wife has lost contact with her family and wants to travel to Milwaukee to see them. So the husband packs up the AMC Eagle and get on the road out in the Midwest to drive to their destination and satisfy the wife. I really enjoyed this possible reality or outcome of America because I could easily see this happening and that is some cool shit! For that I give it 3 ½ stars.

 

Beyond the 7th Door (DVD) – A Canadian film from 1987 that centers on a man named Boris who just got out of jail and is meeting his ex for a drink. After some bickering about who should have done what before he went to jail suddenly come up with an idea that involves Wendy’s boss and his house. Wendy’s boss is Lord Breston who pays well but supposedly keeps a bunch of cash on hand. So the two come up with a plan of Wendy sneaking Boris in once her shift starts and getting out Boris out when she is done. Once in both are trapped inside by a heavy steel door and they must go forward. A recording of Lord Breston comes over a speaker explaining in order to get out they must move forward for the money or die trying. So it becomes a series of rooms that Boris and Wendy must solve until they get to the end where a million dollars sits. The film is overall really weird and how Wendy and Boris ever got together is a story I would like explained. But the kicker of the film is the ending once they have made it through. Like or hate it you will have to admit this is one of the more interesting films that you will have in your collection as I give it 2 stars.

 

The Medusa Against The Son of Hercules (DVD) – One of the many Italian ‘Hercules’ films that came out in the late 50s and early 60s where this one has no Hercules but it has monsters! A warrior named Perseus fights a sea dragon and Medusa to try and stop a war. But Perseus is double crossed and war breaks out anyway. So by killing Medusa he is able to have warriors return from stone and help. A fun introduction for kids who want to watch some fantasy genre films or just a nice appetizer for the early 80’s cult flick “Clash of the Titans”. I give it 2 stars.

 

The Raven (YouTube) – Todd Ernest Braley shows off his filmmaking and casting talents with this short film adaption of the Edgar Allan Poe story. The black and white short film has narration throughout telling the story as two wonderful actresses act it out. Poe fans will love this short film so be sure to hit up Todd at: https://www.facebook.com/colofilmmaker as I give it 4 out of 4 stars.

 

The Bucks County Massacre (DVD) – This is an independent found footage flick released through Brain Damage Films. The event in question takes place in 2008 with the film/documentary being released in 2010. Basically a group of friends head to a remote cabin for a 25th birthday party. Of course someone is filming everything going on there. While the footage unfolds there are interviews with family members of the deceased from the videos. All of them of course trying to get past the hard times but also still trying to understand how this could happen?  Especially with police trying to stop the leak of the footage out there on the internet but anyway once the party is starting to die down a girl goes missing. Her boyfriend goes looking, people get angered, poor judgment because of the drinking, and presto they are all being attacked by some human-like creature. From there it is all blood and chaos. The film is not bad at all just for me takes entirely way too much time building up the party and every character in the party even before the girl goes missing so I give it 1 ½ out of 4 stars.

 

Tagus Ranch Massacre (DVD) – A group of friends heading out to a deserted restaurant on a bus breakdown but after some repairs finally get to their destination. Mostly tired and miserable the group of friends wants to just sleep after getting there but a friend falls down and may have had a seizure? Nope, just a demon spirit possessing his ass! Of course the group slowly disappears or becomes possessed by these demon spirits that haunt the former restaurant. The demons don’t just possess them they also want to kill in very gruesome ways. Think of “Night of the Demons” on a much smaller budget and I can respect that. Not a big fan of the ending but sure it felt right when the project was finished leaving it open as I give it 2 out of 4 stars.

 

Any comments or questions please send to grossmoviereview@verizon.netor www.facebook.com/grossmoviereviews . Remember folks always support your local independent movie theater, independent video store, and independent filmmakers! It will keep horror alive………

Don’t forget you can also hear Kyle Poling and me talking about horror flicks on a weekly basis on the Bloodbaths and Boomsticks podcast at: www.bloodbathspodcast.blogspot.com/ also available at http://www.stitcher.com/podcast/kyle-poling-2/bloodbaths-and-boomsticks?refid=stpr

 

Plus you can always go to the greatest T-shirt place online or if you are in Texas visit the store of “Fast Custom Shirts” where T-shirt Joe is the only place you should purchase your horror T-shirts: Go to www.fastcustomshirts.com for details.

 

See yinz at GROSSFEST! July 28, 2018! Go check out www.grossfest.com for all the details! 

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Gross Movie Reviews #442

0

Gross Movie Reviews #442

 

Rampage (On Demand) – Dwayne ‘The Rock” Johnson stars in the video game adaption film that most people have forgotten that it was a video game from the late 80s. A government experiment goes wrong in space and causes a scientist to try to escape with canisters from their experiment but the escape pod blows up on reentry sending the canisters around Earth. When they open it causes mutations in an ape, a gator, and a wolf that terrorize everybody just to get to Chicago because they are being drawn there by a beacon that is now in their DNA. The Rock is an ape specialist that has been teaching George sign language and other things. So once the ape mutates The Rock struggles to explain to people George is a good ape, it’s the experimental stuff that is causing him to grow and go crazy. The CGI isn’t the best but people we got three giant monsters terrorizing a city and eating people so count me in every time as I give it 2 ½ stars.

 

Cargo (On Demand) – So I was told I needed to see this Netflix zombie flick? So I sat down and watched this Australian zombie flick that centers around at first a married couple with a small child that is on a boat floating down a river to avoid zombie attacks. Unsure what their next move is as they are running out of food. They find boat wreckage and the wife gets bit when she goes back to the boat to investigate. So they make their way to land as she has only has 48 hours before changing. They are trying to get to find help for their child which during this the father also gets bitten and it becomes a journey across the outback to find a family to take care of the child. Like the zombie film “The Dead” that came out a few years back it is a different idea but goes through some quite boring periods. If you are a zombie aficionado you will still want to see this as I give it 1 ½ stars.

 

War for The Planet of the Apes (DVD) – 15 years after the flu began killing humans and the apes escaped to the woods it all led to this where Caesar is seen as a ghost. He has been on the move trying to help other apes and find a safe home where they no longer have to deal with the humans. Military has been looking for him for the past two years with no luck as the film picks up after the events of the last film. But as we come to find out this military army has gone rogue as the leader lost his son to looking for Caesar and the flu has mutated. It causes humans to lose speech. I enjoyed the story of this sequel as it seems to be a prequel to the original series of movies without being that. It was able to tell its own story, updated story but keep original movie fans like myself in the loop with this new telling of the story. I give the film 3 ½ stars.

 

Deadpool 2 (Theater) – So one of the funniest damn comic book movies got a sequel and it was still funny as hell. This time around Deadpool is depressed because his girl gets killed by some low life who tracked him down and he wasn’t able to save her. But a kid with the power of fire needs to be saving so Deadpool gets a team together to track down the kid and save the day. Problem is a bad ass from the future Cable is time traveling superhero who has come the future to kill the kid because he killed Cable’s family in the future. With that Deadpool and Cable spend most of the movie fighting each other too much to the point the kid makes friends with the Juggernaut to help him seek revenge against the man that called him, “an abomination”. This one does try to tame the jokes down just a little bit but the film is still a lot fun and glad to see this character grow now with a team. This franchise has an interesting future especially if Disney is now involved as I give the film 4 stars.

 

Tomb Raider (On Demand) – This reboot, remake, whatever yinz kids are calling this these days had my curiosity for the mere reason I liked the other two older flicks based on the popular video game. This film takes Lara Croft from a little bit of a different point of view where Lara isn’t the female Indiana Jones we all know. She is a woman who skipped college and struggles with the disappearance of her father the past several years. Forced to sign papers to take over everything she is given a key. This key happens to be a secret room where her father’s tomb is and she comes to find out her father has been living a double life. He got lost on an expedition looking for an evil Asian queen that could bring ruin to the world as we know it. So she investigates as she has always felt he is still alive? Finds herself in Hong Kong getting a boat and searching for an impossible island. In the end after finding her father and fighting an evil group of people called Trinity she has found her calling and is going to use her father’s riches to fight it. I give the flick 2 ½ stars.

 

The Leech Woman (DVD) – A film from 1960 where a scientist is visited by an old woman who claims she is 140 years old. She has been able to live this long because of a magic powder her tribe in Africa has. But she is going back home to die but felt to tell this scientist and allow him to do tests to prove she is telling the truth. The scientist sees it as a chance to cash in and make his wife young again because he doesn’t like her anymore. So this scientist, his friend, and the wife travel to investigate this tribe and its beliefs. But it isn’t just powder from a plant; you have to kill someone and get brain fluid from a gland at the back of the neck and drink it. This is what keeps the tribes people so young if they desire? The wife loses her mind and becomes obsessed with how it works that she steals and brings it back to the states but she has to kill on a regular basis because the effects do not last long. Fun movie if you would be watching it in a drive-in otherwise a bit boring but still fun for nostalgia as I give it 2 stars.

 

The Dark Tower (DVD) – So I never read the books but still don’t quite understand how this could be crammed into 93 minutes. This time traveling film about the ‘man in black’ and ‘the gunslinger’ fighting over a boy with amazing psychic powers that could be used to destroy the tower and allow the demons in. The film comes off like a T.V. pilot for a new show on SyFy Channel and not sure if that is good or bad? But even without reading the books there just seems to be certain plot points that should have been fleshed out more? But hey whatever they usually screw up most Stephen King adaptions so it wasn’t a horrible time killing 90 minutes as I give it 2 stars.

 

Plague (DVD) – A lower budgeted zombie flick from Australia where the zombies have started eating people and a group of people have chosen to stay inside this shed. A fight breaks out and one of them dies and they split up. Then a stranger show up claiming to be friendly, has food, has a gun, and wants to just live happily until this all blows over. But when the husband has asthma attack the stranger takes advantage of the woman to help him out. The film should have just skipped to the end where everyone is just trying to fuck the other over to stay away from the zombies but instead tries to put together this boring ass flick. They don’t even feature much zombie action until the last few minutes of the film as I give it 0 stars.

 

Escape Plan 2: Hades (DVD) – Sly Stallone is back as Breslin as him and his associates are still trying to break out of the impossible prisons until a hostage is killed in the process. They let go the guy they believe is at fault and time goes by. Now they are being captured one by one and thrown into another impossible prison that houses criminals of all kinds that might be worth a lot to someone on the outside for the information they carry so the system has become for profit. A fun follow-up without Arnold, but some newcomers to the Breslin team that comes off like a combo of “The Expendables” and “Fortress 2”. To me that sounds awesome so keep making sequels as I give this 3 stars.

 

Corbin Nash (On Demand) – Malcolm McDowell is a blind man telling a story about a hard-nosed cop who had no family but is about to learn the truth about them. An old friend invites Rutger Hauer in for a couple minutes to explain to Corbin that his parents were monster hunters. Corbin not really believing in this sets his mind back on all the disappearances that keep happening and may have finally had a lead. The lead is two psychos who just happen to be vampires who capture Corbin so he could be used in some underground fighting ring to be either food or entertainment for these other vamps. Corbin gets turned into a vampire himself but uses it for good to find these two monsters and rip them a part. A fun horror flick that is like a comic book that has been done several times through the years. It’s enjoyable but doesn’t make me want to run out there and tell the world you should buy several copies as it seem to be missing something and it wasn’t just more Rutger Hauer. I give this comic bookish horror movie 2 ½ stars.

Primal Rage: The Legend of Oh-Mah (DVD) – No relation to the mad monkey film of 1989 as it’s about the Native American Bigfoot legend that lives in the deep woods. A couple driving down the road after a run in with drunken hunters at the gas station hit something in the road. They go check it out to see it’s a mutilated body so they call the cops but are attacked by something throwing rocks. Forced down the hill into the river the couple is now wet, far from their car, and not sure exactly where they are at or what happened. In the morning they begin their trek through the woods where they find the drunken hunters in hopes of using their radio or cell phone? But the creature that has been stalking them begins attacking them and brutalizing their bodies as this legendary creature wants the female. It’s up to the county sheriff to believe in his heritage to go help find this couple and kill this monstrous creature that is just protecting the woods? A good amount of gore and another take on the Bigfoot legend makes this a cool little horror flick for Bigfoot fans to check out as I give it 2 ½ stars. Before I forget Bigfoot/Oh-Mah is able to use an axe, knives, a JAVENLIN! They explain it sort of…

 

Any comments or questions please send to grossmoviereview@verizon.netor www.facebook.com/grossmoviereviews . Remember folks always support your local independent movie theater, independent video store, and independent filmmakers! It will keep horror alive………

Don’t forget you can also hear Kyle Poling and me talking about horror flicks on a weekly basis on the Bloodbaths and Boomsticks podcast at: www.bloodbathspodcast.blogspot.com/ also available at http://www.stitcher.com/podcast/kyle-poling-2/bloodbaths-and-boomsticks?refid=stpr

 

Plus you can always go to the greatest T-shirt place online or if you are in Texas visit the store of “Fast Custom Shirts” where T-shirt Joe is the only place you should purchase your horror T-shirts: Go to www.fastcustomshirts.com for details.

 

See yinz at GROSSFEST! July 28, 2018! Go check out www.grossfest.com for all the details! 

Gross Movie Reviews #440

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Gross Movie Reviews #440

 

The Mole People (DVD) – After an earthquake shakes things up for archeologists as they find an opening in some ruins that leads to a secret underground city. The city had been shut off from humanity for thousands of years after a similar earthquake and believes the daylight kills them. If that wasn’t enough they enslaved Mole creatures to do their bidding of digging up mushrooms. A fun 50s ‘Creature Feature’ well worth checking out again as I give it 2 ½ stars.

 

Sandy Hook Lingerie Party Massacre (DVD) – Before you get on your soapbox to bitch about the title, the film was released in 2000 and that is about all I will do to defend this turd. Well maybe defend Debbie Rochon also but I am sure she may regret being a part of this project? A group of strippers decide it’s time for a vacation so they head to a beach house in the middle of a hurricane. And then just non-sense happens with Mr. Creepo. Before I forget Debbie Rochon plays part stripper/part psychic, it does make some kind of weird sense if you pay attention to the film? But bottom line ‘massacre film’ fans no one dies until an hour in and it’s pretty lame so for that I just give it a ½ star.

Paranoia Tapes (Vimeo/DVD) – A recent independent project where a man finds films, clips, random VHS tapes, of murders, interviews, confessions, etc. He uploads them to the internet in hopes of other people watching them and being just as scared as he is. The film comes off as some sort of ‘Found Footage’ film. But saying that I am not sure that is what the film can be classified as that? In an age of where kids now watch other people play video games on YouTube that is what this flick reminded me of. Right or wrong this movie is not meant for me as much as maybe the “Paranormal Activity” kids and for that I give it 1 out of 4 stars. For more info: https://www.facebook.com/paranoiatapes/?ref=br_rs

 

Paranoia Tapes 2: Press Play (Vimeo/DVD) – So the sequel picks up with several filmmakers contributing again to the project. But what makes this venture a little different is that it looks a little more polished. But again movie clips, possible real footage, police footage, you be the judge is being uploaded to the internet by a guy named Chase. Chase is going somewhat insane because there is this Henry dude that keeps sending him these videos and clips. There is more violence, murder, but also it seems more of a coherent film that is like a blend of “Grave Encounters” and “V/H/S” on the low budget independent level. Again this type of project isn’t for me but easily can see the younger crowd really enjoying this film for what it really is. For that I give it 2 out 4 stars. For more info: https://www.facebook.com/PT2PRESSPLAY/

 

Siren (YouTube/DVD) – Another found footage flick from the same people who did “Paranoia Tapes” where a few years back some teenagers go missing in Kansas. They decide to do a film project for school over the holiday break that involves some kids supposedly living out in the woods. An urban myth of sorts, they want to debunk it if true interview them and get the story of why they are out there? They head to the woods to find the ‘Fender Children’. Goal is to get some footage, but a weird thing happens, and then when they are checking out the footage later and they are murdered. Most of it being filmed and the USB drive shows up at a police station a few months later. Feels like a blend of “The Blair Witch Project” and “Area 51” if you are a fan of ‘found footage’ flicks as I give this flick 2 ½ out of 4 stars. For more info:     https://www.facebook.com/Southernsykosproductions/

 

Night of the Living Dead: Resurrection (DVD) – Another remake, reboot, re-whatever you wanna call this horseshit from the UK where they thought it was a good idea. There are zombies but also apparently the kids don’t care so they began to kill people also for fun. Another sad attempt to cash in on the title and the film company that released it should not be allowed to exist. ACTUALLY COME UP WITH YOUR OWN IDEAS AND STOP SUCKING! This is the kinda of crap that gives horror movies and legit filmmakers Indy or big budget a bad name. It is best you avoid and move on without ever watching this turd. Live this crap for me to witness and take the abuse as I give it 0 stars.

 

Bikini Party Massacre (DVD) – A little slasher film from 2002 with a little twist were you get to see lots of boobs! Six people head out to the woods for a weekend of fun and of course run out of gas. Of course the female version of ‘Crazy Ralph’ shows up to help out with the gas issue and the group to move on. After some partying, boobs, and weird dreams you learn there is a psycho among them. Weird thing is no of them exist except him… Weird and maybe a better film than it ever deserves to be but it was on my ‘massacre list’ so I was going to watch it as I give it 2 stars.

 

The Twilight People (DVD) – An early 70s Philippines flick that help start Pam Grier’s career that is like a cheaper “Island of Dr. Moreau”. The effects are not great but the passion for filmmaking is and this flick has a scientist kidnapping people to experiment on. Tis scientist is looking for the perfect human to test his theory of humans needing to evolve for what is coming in the future. Pam Grier as a ‘Panther Woman’, a weird dude as a winged mutant, there should have been six sequels to this flick especially with Corman’s company helping. I give it 3 stars.

 

Cyber Ninja (VHS) – A late 80’s Asian flick that pits Human Ninjas vs. Demon Robots or Mecha Ninjas. After the great wars a cyber-ninja is born from an experiment by the dark overlord who stole a great ninja’s soul to place in a Mecha Ninja and makes it an unstoppable warrior. Crazy special effects are the highlight of this ninja flick that also predates the “Power Rangers” and features ‘Voltron’ sound effects. The Mecha Ninja is torn on helping the humans but believes it is his only chance to regain his body again. The film is a fun crazy mess if you are a fan of stuff like “The Guyver”. ‘Cyber Ninja’ is a well worth find out there that I haven’t heard much about but after watching it I give it 3 stars.

 

Mad-Made Monster (DVD) – So right before “The Wolf Man” Lon Chaney Jr. did a flick where he is experimented on after an accident. He was on a bus with five other people that crashed and the other folks get electrocuted. He survives so a scientist comes to visit him asking if he wants to help with revelation. But his assistant has other plans to use Mr. Chaney as scapegoat to kill people after he turns him into an electrified zombie. Fun black and white horror crap that can be a lot of fun watching with friends. I give it 2 stars.

 

Journey 2: The Mysterious Island (DVD) – Dwayne “The Rock” Johnson and his stepson follow a Jules Verne story to find an island where an old Michael Caine has discovered Atlantis. Problem of course the island is sinking back into the ocean and they must find Captain Nemo’s sub in order to survive the ordeal. Bad CGI, overacting by the Rock, and old Michael Caine makes it entertaining enough to get through the flick with my daughter so I can watch real crap. I give it 1 ½ stars.

Joel (Vimeo/DVD) – An independent flick that documents the murders of Joel Rifkin. A serial killer who in the Long Island area killed 17 people in a 3 ½ year period (1989-1993) and no one knew until he was pulled over with a dead body in the back of his truck.  According to Joel not only was he a disappointment to his father because of his learning disability but was picked on by other kids. Joel became a loner and was a virgin until he was about to go to college. But that all changed when Joel understood you could pay for sex. Joel constantly blew through his money on hookers. But as that was happening Joel also fantasized about strangling a woman during the sex act. After he did it for the first time he became addicted to it but no one ever noticed because they were hookers. Yeah they made the news but Joel kept going until that faithful night he was caught all because of a license plate. He always believed he could get them to get in a stranger’s car? Never knew about this dude but now I do and the filmmaker did an amazing job of bringing this serial killer to film. And it is kinda creepy how much the actor actually looks like the real killer named Joel Rifkin. Great stuff for horror fans and true crime nuts as I give it 3 ½ out of 4 stars. For more info: http://www.joelthemovie.com .

 

Any comments or questions please send to grossmoviereview@verizon.netor www.facebook.com/grossmoviereviews . Remember folks always support your local independent movie theater, independent video store, and independent filmmakers! It will keep horror alive………

Don’t forget you can also hear Kyle Poling and me talking about horror flicks on a weekly basis on the Bloodbaths and Boomsticks podcast at: www.bloodbathspodcast.blogspot.com/ also available at http://www.stitcher.com/podcast/kyle-poling-2/bloodbaths-and-boomsticks?refid=stpr

 

Plus you can always go to the greatest T-shirt place online or if you are in Texas visit the store of “Fast Custom Shirts” where T-shirt Joe is the only place you should purchase your horror T-shirts: Go to www.fastcustomshirts.com for details.

 

See yinz at GROSSFEST! July 28, 2018! Go check out www.grossfest.com for all the details! 

 

Gross Movie Reviews #439

0

Gross Movie Reviews #439

 

Sorority Party Massacre (DVD) – The film has several all-star cameos (Kevin Sorbo, Ron Jeremy, Leslie Easterbrook, Richard Moll) and starts off like a “Scream” film so I was in. prestige sorority girls get together at a mansion in Grizzly Cove every year to try and win the Fawson grant. But what the beautiful young ladies don’t know is girls have been going missing over the past 30 years without anyone noticing. But a suspended big city detective heads out to Grizzly Cove to check up on the boss’ daughter and stumbles upon the several disappearances that have gone unnoticed. It’s up to the big city detective to put all the pieces of the crimes together. The movie starts off like a fun lower budget slasher flick but fails in the second half to keep me or any other horror movie fan interested as I give it 1 star.

 

Lake Placid: Legacy (SyFy Channel/DVD) – It’s been 25 years since the events that occurred with the big croc. Since then the Black Lake area has been fenced off like Area 51 and not on Google maps! But a team of Eco-activists who just did their last event is challenged by a feuding group of eco-activists to make their way to Black Lake. So they do and break into the fenced off area surprised by the calmness of what was a “toxic spill event” according to the government. Once there they see the place is abandoned but no toxic spill took place here. But once they find the abandoned lab and dead bodies something is amiss and still there? Eventually the team finds out scientists were there to play god by doing stem cell research with a giant croc that is loose roaming the quiet waters of Black Lake. The buildup is a lot of fun and there is some blood but the sequel fails to finish off a great concept for a sequel this far into the series. It is better than the last couple sequels but could have been so much better as I give it 2 ½ stars.

 

Tarantulas: The Deadly Cargo (VHS/You Tube) – A fun TV movie from 1977 about poisonous spiders being shipped from Ecuador to the U.S. by Dr. Johnny Fever and Tom Atkins. These two guys get the idea of make big cash taking coffee beans from Ecuador and selling them for big cash in San Francisco. But as the coffee beans are being loaded spiders are also making their way onto the plane inside with the beans. To top it off the foreign military types won’t allow the pair to take off unless they have money so of course they let three people from Ecuador hitch a ride. They are the first ones to encounter the dangerous spider and the plane ride goes downhill from there. With nowhere to land they crash near a small orange picking community where shortly after they leak fuel and the plane is set ablaze. This causes the spiders to spread and attack the people of the small town. But the worst is yet to come when the spiders find the orange warehouse! If the people don’t find a way to get the spiders out safely, the big store won’t take the oranges and the town will go bankrupt. So after several deaths in the community the people figure out some kind of wasp can make the spiders freeze, immobilize, safe to pick up and get rid of… Hilarious as hell but a fun piece of TV movie history to watch as I give it 2 ½ stars.

White Goods (You Tube) – An independent film out of the UK from White Raven Films where a group of people show up to a mansion for spirits, magic, and a psychic. But a dude named ‘Rio Tard’ finds a box hidden in the basement and doesn’t remember what happened afterward. Strange things begin to happen as people begin to die as Rio apparently unleashed a demon with finding the box. The demon is killing anyone that Rio knows including a fucking dryer eating a person (thank you The Mangler). With it being from another country sometimes for me it loses something in translation? It has the blood, weird humor, and a demon but not the killer instinct of a demon film to enjoy? Reason I bring up maybe this horror film is not for me but a certain audience. Anyway still glad I got to watch as I give it 2 ½ out of 4 stars. You always get bonus points for appliances fucking people up. If anything great artwork for the DVD that will get horror fans interested. For more info: https://www.facebook.com/White-Goods-movie-978394265559408/

 

Meltdown (DVD) – A mid-90s Jet Li flick that some of you might know as “High Risk”. Jet Li’s character loses his family in a car bomb that he wasn’t able to defuse in time. A couple years later we see him as a bodyguard/stand-in for a drunken famous stunt man known as Frankie Lane. When an exhibition that has invited Frankie is taken over by terrorists Jet Li must fight his way in and save the day. Wall to wall martial arts action that will make you a fan of Jet Li’s work. Fun stuff folks as I give it 3 stars.

 

Werewolf in London (DVD) – An interesting Universal Picture where this was a precursor to 1941’s “The Wolf Man”. Apparently this flick came out in 1935 and people were not excited at all by it like “The Wolf Man” we all know and love. Plus this flick doesn’t follow all the werewolf movie myths we have come to know. Maybe this was the exception for the question in “The Monster Squad” about how to kill werewolf? Anyhow, a doctor is bitten in the forbidden mountains of Tibet while looking for a flower that only blooms in the moonlight. Goes back home and comes to find out he is changing and must go out at night to kill. But a competitor lets him in on a secret that the flower when in bloom can help the werewolf issue. Nowhere near as creepy and fun as “The Wolf Man” six years later but an interesting watch if you are a fan of the Universal Monsters and worth reading up on. I give it 2 stars.

Stephan Kora: A Monster from Irkutsk (DVD) – I have either found a new black metal band or Alex Wesley and Philip Brocklehurst have another crazy horror project straight out of Russia. A renowned author is forced to write a book about true crime, a serial killer named Stephan Kora to be exact. In order to write the book he must watch the films about Mr. Kora’s murders as Mr. Kora like to document everything. There isn’t enough alcohol in the world to help this author get through this task. Mr. Kora the serial killer was screwed from birth as his face was filled with tumors. This of course made everyone make fun and take advantage of Mr. Kora all of his young life until he decided to go his brutal killing spree. If you enjoy serial killer flicks or TV shows this will be a gory flick right up your alley as I give this short film 3 out of 4 stars. Need to find out more, track this dude down:  https://www.facebook.com/philip.brocklehurst.9

 

Front Page (DVD) – So a local (Pittsburgh) filmmaker Michael Migliore has started to work on a few projects. This short film of his is about a common man named Wilbur who is obsessed with making the front page of the paper and getting from under his mother’s curse. But no matter how many people Wilbur slaughters in the dirty streets or behind a Dollar Tree of Pittsburgh he cannot get the front page. The front page belongs to an unknown killer who is leaving bloodless victims everywhere. Wilbur is so concentrated on his task doesn’t see the girl Alexis he just picked up will be his undoing. I enjoyed the short film concept but wasn’t thrilled with the casting choices but overall a short film to build on as I give it 2 ½ out of 4 stars. For more info:  https://www.facebook.com/michael.migliore.9

 

Alexis (DVD) – Bloodless bodies are showing up around the streets of Pittsburgh and the police have no answers. Is it the work of a serial killer or a vampire? According to some crazed religious freak on public access news channel it’s a vampire. The work the killer has done has been nicknamed “The Downtown Drainer”. Alexis, an athletic boxer on the verge of making the Olympics is upset with this as she has concealed her identity as a vampire for many years. The only person that knows about her and supports her is Alexis’ girlfriend Laura who just happens to be a doctor who is trying to figure out a better way for Alexis to feed or survive in the long run. But Alexis has pain from the hunger of blood and tries to pick people who deserve it? But after an incident and a person close to the pair is killed by Alexis they choose to move out in the sticks to try to lay low and look like the normal girl/girl couple making things work. But a shitload of hurt comes down when the local redneck asshole shows up drained of blood in an alley and the Christian mayor calls in vampire hunters. I enjoyed the concept of “Alexis” being expanded but this film could have been edited down, including cutting out the three-way sex scene, added more blood, and leaving out the vampire hunters. I just feel Michael Migliore may have overthought this film leaving it less desirable than the interesting concept short film he made called “Front Page”. For that I give the feature 1 ½ out of 4 stars. For more info:   https://www.facebook.com/michael.migliore.9

 

Sicario (DVD) – A female F.B.I. agent (Kate) who is a bad ass has just been pulled to be a part of a D.O.D. mission. She is to observe and understand what is coming. She is to observe a team of experts who plan to fight against the Mexican cartels who just happened to tunnel their way into Arizona recently. She has the chance to make an actual difference as there has been a change at the highest level of U.S. government to try to stop or at least counter the latest actions of the cartels. Josh Brolin is a free spirited man who believes Kate can learn and understand what the government is trying to do here with the cartels. But then she introduced to a mysterious man, a hitman played by Benicio Del Toro who is very calm in what he does and kind of looks out for Kate at first. A deal has been made, lines are now blurred, and there isn’t procedure any longer, as its war! And the hitman is here to restore order by any means needed. Alejandro, the hitman is a Columbian hitman that is here in the U.S. to restore order. When Kate disagrees she finds out the hard way this isn’t the F.B.I. any longer. With this latest flick I have seen Del Toro has just made it into ‘my top 5 actors I want in everything’. This action flick about the cartels does not wimp out as it is cold hearted and fucking awesome as I give it 4 stars.

 

Strange Shadows in an Empty Room (VHS) – A flick from Canada (the Italy of the North) surprised me. This mid-70s flick is about a hard-nosed detective named Tony who is pissed and wants answers after his sister dies of a strange death in front of friends. So Tony begins looking into her college life and knocking on doors and does not like what he is exactly finds. But it gets a little more complicated when bodies begin to pile up that may be connected to her death. A bad ass murder/mystery movie that has a scene where a dude holds a knife to an infant to hold off Tony in a hospital. The film is a little rough around the edges and a little dated but don’t let that stop you from enjoying this “Dirty Harry” clone to its fullest as I give it 3 stars.

 

Any comments or questions please send to grossmoviereview@verizon.netor www.facebook.com/grossmoviereviews . Remember folks always support your local independent movie theater, independent video store, and independent filmmakers! It will keep horror alive………

Don’t forget you can also hear Kyle Poling and me talking about horror flicks on a weekly basis on the Bloodbaths and Boomsticks podcast at: www.bloodbathspodcast.blogspot.com/ also available at http://www.stitcher.com/podcast/kyle-poling-2/bloodbaths-and-boomsticks?refid=stpr

 

Plus you can always go to the greatest T-shirt place online or if you are in Texas visit the store of “Fast Custom Shirts” where T-shirt Joe is the only place you should purchase your horror T-shirts: Go to www.fastcustomshirts.com for details.

 

See yinz at GROSSFEST! July 28, 2018! Go check out www.grossfest.com for all the details! 

Gross Movie Reviews #438

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Gross Movie Reviews #438

 

Happy Hour Holocaust 2: The Second Round (DVD) – One of my favorite independent filmmakers ‘Jim Roberts’ is back at it again with his crew. They recently finished up a sequel to their fun anthology film they released a couple years back. I have had this film sitting in my possession for almost two months. Jim wanted me to hold off because he had a little bit more editing left but I could not wait any longer as I am a huge fan of his work. And his crew that consists of his family and Jorge Delarosa are some of the coolest down to earth talented people you could ever meet. This new anthology of course expands the role of the bartender who does the wrap around story along with one of the best made movie openings I have ever witnessed. Great stuff guys! Wonderful music and effects blended together to set the mood of this independent feature. Our bartender has another three stories to tell: first was a reality show of drunken house flippers and what’s in the basement? Second is about mom and two brothers who have to take care of her. (Reviewed this short while back) Third is about a lonely dude out in the woods that seeks revenge for his dog. As usual Jim and family put together a tightly knit cast and film with some of the best special-effects you will see in an independent film on the east coast! A well-executed follow up film for the family as they never disappoint as I give it 3 ½ out of 4 stars. For more info on the film or Jim: https://www.facebook.com/profile.php?id=100004080845938

The Litch (DVD) – A hilarious film from independent filmmaker James Balsamo about a character named Vinnie who tells the story of accidentally awaken an undead demon wizard thing! James uses his talent to bring in some great cameo appearances to move the story along and keep it loose. Two of the cameos include Jeff Burr, Tom Sizemore and Elizabeth Daily. (Ms. Daily is a fave of mine just because of her work in the 80s.) Vinnie awakens the undead wizard thingy when he steals an expensive crystal from a crystal store. And according to Vinnie “that was the worst idea ever.” When he does it sets in motion events of “The Litch” possessing people in Vinnie’s life and their goal is to retrieve the crystal. If this happens “The Litch” is able to be THE RULER OF THE FOUR WORLDS! “The Litch” needs an army as he feeds on their souls. The film about a bumbling criminal and undead demon thingy is absolutely well-constructed, hilarious, and can see this having a few sequels in the future? And if anything else James did make sure you get to see lots of boobs. For that I give it 3 out of 4 stars and for more info on the film: http://www.acidbathproductions.com/

 

Quad-X: The Porn Movie Massacre (DVD) – First off if you are like me and have seen “The Porn Shoot Massacre” before you seen this film? Erase it from your mind right now damn it! This is a much better constructed and thought out horror film with shades of “Scream”. Quad-X porn company is about to have their biggest shoot ever. But a killer or killers are stalking and slashing their way through all the Quad-X’s famous pornstars. With lots of drama on the set between director, producers, and actors barely anyone notices people disappearing until local detectives get involved. But the movie must go on as they say in the industry! Instead of throwing lots of tits and ass at the screen for the viewer the filmmakers go in a different direction and give you a horror movie that doesn’t feel like a poor excuse to not call it porn? “The Porn Shoot Massacre” anyone? I really enjoyed the direction of this production, the selectively placed ads over the nudity, and of course the dildo drill to the head (it kind of resembles the Bob scene in “Gates of Hell” or “City of the Living Dead”). At first I was only going to give this flick 2 stars but as the days pass from first watching I have to give it 3 stars as I know I will be watching this film again. Thank you filmmakers understanding the difference between humor, horror, and porn…

Overdose: Death of a Punk Rocker (Blu-ray) – When looking at this movie the first thing that catches my eye is the tagline: “Punk’s not dead… But Brad is!” okay I am in. Brad Stanley is the lead singer of a band called ‘B-movie Nightmares’. His former band mate and best friend Brian is watching the news and sees this report of Brad dying of a heroin overdose. Brian at first in shock refuses to accept this fate. But thinks about it calmly and decides to go down the rabbit hole of finding out the real truth of Brad’s death because Brian refuses to believe there wasn’t something or somebody behind his death. This rabbit hole gives us hilarious stories of when ‘B-movie Nightmares’ were together, lots of dialogue on Brad wanting to join the “27 club” of famous people, music industry conspiracies, and why Brian quit the band. If you are a Kevin Smith fan you enjoy this entertaining dialogue driven film. By no means this is a horror movie but that doesn’t mean you cannot take a chance on watching a film from filmmaker D.J. Yarotsky and enjoying something pretty fucking interesting with great music. I give it 3 out of 4 stars and for more info: https://www.facebook.com/overdosefilm/

Freak in the Basement (DVD) – Another gory flick from Alex Wesley and Russia has made its way to me again where this film was a few years in the making. We meet a man named Nicholai. Nicholai visits a therapist to help him with his serious problem. Needs help, he needs someone to listen; he needs to stop killing people! But Nicholai begins to tell the story to the therapist of the monster in his basement. He comes in contact with creature after he tries to evict a tenant. The tenant is high or delusional but she wipes some weird stuff on his lips and Nicholai feels a high like no other before. Quickly becoming addicted to it and the creature possibly having telekinetic powers with him, he understands that the creature eats human flesh it secretes this snotty liquid/sweat which gets you high. This high cause Nicholai to go on a killing spree and then the movie gets real weird when the alien cyborg arrives to retrieve the creature to be a slave on another planet? Yes people I cannot make this entertaining shit up and love it when I see it on screen. Just when you think you have seen it all, you haven’t thanks to Alex Wesley and his independent filmmaking crew! I give this fun adventure into gore 3 out of 4 stars and for more info: https://www.facebook.com/groups/837731036372859/about/ and https://www.facebook.com/ShansHorrorFilms/

 

Swingers Massacre (VHS/YouTube) – The 1974 thriller is also known as “Inside Amy” for 70s film buffs. This cautionary tale of being into the “swinging” is about a lawyer who has been married for several years to a beautiful woman named Amy who is just happy with everything. But after Charlie hears a story about the lifestyle from one of his divorcee clients he is hell bent on trying this out with Amy whether she is into or not. Out of just wanting to please Charlie and his limp old wiener Amy goes along with the idea of going to a hip swingers club where they meet a few couples. One thing leads to another at a party afterward and Amy just happens to be the life of the party as males and female partners want “Inside Amy”. (Ha, ha, I couldn’t help myself as I wanted to laugh while writing this) Anyway Amy has a wonderful time and Charlie not so much. When they are calling back for the couple to come back for more parties Charlie’s reaction is “No!” and go on a killing spree of those who have and still want to bang Amy. A wonderful 70s film that I was unaware of and glad I now own a copy as I will be revisiting this again soon as I give it 3 stars.

 

Hell Spa (DVD) – A horrible but hilarious fun bad film to watch with friends is about Benson’s Health Spa which is closing due to all the new spiffy workout clubs that have sprung up. The failed business is closing its doors until a mysterious man named Mr. Ex comes by and offers her a one-time deal she cannot refuse. A few days later Benson’s Health Spa is up and running and looks better than it ever did. They even run a commercial saying “Look Beautiful and Stay Fit or Never Pay a Dime”. But things are not always what they seem as a local college paper investigates the resurgence in Benson’s Health Spa and their promotion. Plus they want to know more about the bad-looking 80s TV villain Mr. Ex and what’s his involvement since the new health spa is in every aspect of your life once you join with the new lifetime membership. But don’t worry folks this film doesn’t disappoint being the next film you need to own in your “bad movie collection” when a floppy disk saves all! Remember people film was made in 1990 and released in 1992 as I give it 1 ½ stars.

 

Death Wish (On Demand) – Finally the Eli Roth remake has made its way out there for all of us to witness, tear apart, or just complain it doesn’t have Chuck Bronson. In the times we live in the film has a whole entire different feel to it than the original from the early 70s. I believe that actually helps this film work as Mr. Kersey is played by Bruce Willis and is a doctor from Chicago in this film. When Kersey is called into surgery on his birthday, his wife and daughter get attacked in their home. His wife dies and daughter critically injured, Kersey is distraught with the lack of findings from the police. So just like the original Kersey takes it upon himself to track down the men that wronged his family. The movie isn’t going to make anyone’s best films of the year list but is too easy of a target for society to point too for several reasons. Instead I look at like this: This remake doesn’t bother me at all as it has a complete different feel to it just because what is happening in real life these days and I really didn’t feel anything for any of the characters. I believe Eli Roth did what he could with what was there as I give it 2 ½ stars.

 

Dude Bro Party Massacre 3 (DVD) – Thanks to “5 Second Films” and crowd funding this movie exists as it doesn’t just make fun of the slasher genre as much as points out the some funnier aspects of the lesser known slasher flicks. Plus they wanted to break the record for most kills on film. Brock belongs to a frat who has survived two massacres of a killer named “Motherface”. But he dies when seeing a therapist to talk about what happened. So his twin less appealing brother Brett sets off to pledge for the same frat and find out what really happened to his brother and find his killer. But the frat brothers are not sure to accept Brett or not as they go off to the cabin in the woods for the weekend where they killed the whole town with a flood. Once there the Motherface is back and slicing and dicing her way through the frat brothers in hopes of killing them off completely. And it is possible that Ronald Reagan is behind everything? Hilarious, check your brain at the door horror film that yeah most likely goes a few minutes longer than it should have. But still worth the watch as I give it 3 stars.

 

Any comments or questions please send to grossmoviereview@verizon.netor www.facebook.com/grossmoviereviews . Remember folks always support your local independent movie theater, independent video store, and independent filmmakers! It will keep horror alive………

Don’t forget you can also hear Kyle Poling and me talking about horror flicks on a weekly basis on the Bloodbaths and Boomsticks podcast at: www.bloodbathspodcast.blogspot.com/ also available at http://www.stitcher.com/podcast/kyle-poling-2/bloodbaths-and-boomsticks?refid=stpr

 

Plus you can always go to the greatest T-shirt place online or if you are in Texas visit the store of “Fast Custom Shirts” where T-shirt Joe is the only place you should purchase your horror T-shirts: Go to www.fastcustomshirts.com for details.

 

See yinz at GROSSFEST! July 28, 2018! Go check out www.grossfest.com for all the details! 

What better way to celebrate Free Comic Book Day than it being my birthday also!!!

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The Geekadrome : Games and Comics

534 Brookline Blvd, Pittsburgh, Pennsylvania 15226

 

 

This Free Comic Book Day will also mark out 11th year in Brookline and we want to celebrate that with a sale to coincide with our Free Comic Book Day.

What’s Free Comic Book Day?
FCBD is a celebration of comics, art, and reading where we purchase a selection of comics to give away for free during the event. as well have special exclusive Funko Pop figures that can only be purchased at the event.

What’s going to be on sale?
All kinds of things are going to be on sale, t-shirts will be $10, we will have a special sale table filled with action figures, collectibles and more all half off or more, and of course comics!

Anything else?
YES! We will be giving away some unique collectible merchandise TBA and each purchase gets you an entry to win one, Winners won’t need to be present but will need to pick them up.

Can I take Free Comics for my friend?
No, But you should tell them about it or even bring them with you. Comics are pop culture and our culture and we love to share it, but we can’t tell if we are sharing it or if someone is just being a little greedy.

 

Gross Movie Reviews #434

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Gross Movie Reviews #434

 

The Last Days of Livermore (DVD) – A man travels to Livermore Cemetery to confront his love. He believes it is time to move on from the relationship to other things but has second thoughts as he wants to be with her… Think of the short film as a horror love story with a splatter of gore as I give it 2 ½ out of 4 stars. The short film was shot in Livermore, Pa. and the Livermore Cemetery location look to be a wonderful spot for the film. For more details about the film go to:  www.facebook.com/The-Last-Days-of-Livermore .

Terrifier (On Demand) – A film from Damien Leone that I had been hearing things about for a couple years it seems. Well horror movie fans grab the Halloween candy and turn down the lights as there is a new fun Halloween holiday horror flick to enjoy! Art the Clown is out on the town Halloween night carrying his sack of goodies. Art not having much to say voice wise uses his actions to tell you what he is about to do. As Art wanders the streets a pretty young lady named Tara catches his eye and follows Tara and her friend Dawn into a pizza shop. Of course Dawn takes pics of her and the weird ass clown that keeps an eye on Tara for her social media page. From there it just gets creepy as hell as their car has a flat and Tara runs to a close by apartment building to use the bathroom. The fun holiday night goes to hell when Art the Clown shows up again to begin his bloody path to the girls and anyone that interferes. I love the whole thing of Art the Clown just existing and actor David Howard Thornton was perfect for the role. “Terrifier” wasn’t just entertaining but pure horror awesomeness as the film took the gore level up a notch with a great ‘death by hacksaw’ scene (poor Dawn)! The film was grim, gritty, and absolutely beautiful. Mark my words “Terrifier” will be one of the best horror films of 2018 as I give it 4 out of 4 stars.

Ayla (Vimeo/DVD) – The latest from ‘The October People’ and John Portanova is a wonderful dramatic thriller about a man who spirals out of control. Elton has always tried to hold on to his dead sister. She died when Elton and his brother were young but Elton refuses to move on. He struggles daily and when Elton and his girlfriend drive out to a house to fool around he believes he is seeing her again and again. The struggle gets worse and Elton returns to the old house like he is driven to go there and find something? Next thing you know Elton is digging under a weird tree and finds his dead sister… alive and thirty years older. Beyond happy he loses connection with his girlfriend and tries to explain to his mom and brother Ayla is back and this isn’t some fake person. While doing that apparently Ayla likes to puke fluids and be naked for most of the movie. Did Elton will this to happen? Is there life after death? Is it all just in Elton’s mind and we are along for the ride? Truly weird and bizarre tale that will make you think and want to watch it again. I enjoy what ‘The October People’ are doing as they don’t stick to a certain genre and try to give you something very different movie wise than you are use too. I give this cool weirdo flick 3 out of 4 stars. For more info on the film go to: www.theoctoberpeople.net .

 

Partners (DVD) – A 1982 supposed comedy has a straight cop and a gay cop go undercover in the gay community to solve a series of murders among gay men. Some bad jokes even in 1982 and a relationship blossoming between the two cops are the main plot points of the film. Surprisingly the cast is what kept me watching the film (Ryan O’Neal, John Hurt, James Remar, and Martin Kove). The film is watchable but it isn’t a “Cruising” as I give this forgotten comedy 1 star.

 

Bigfoot vs. D.B. Cooper (DVD) – Once again I am watching stuff I couldn’t make up if I tried unless I was David DeCoteau? A pretty boring film full of shirtless hunks, it’s November 1971 and supposedly in the woods turkey hunting in the state of Washington. A man named Bernie now older tells a story of how and why he knows the real story of D.B. Cooper. There is a reason the authorities have never found D.B. Cooper and it’s all because of Bigfoot. And Bigfoot is a Peeping Tom apparently? Weird shit so of course I watched it as I give it a half star only for having voiceover work done by Eric Roberts and Linnea Quigley.

 

The Plague (DVD) – A small community called Love Canal in Canada has been used a toxic dumping ground for years. But the dumping ground hasn’t only been used for toxic materials as bodies have been dumped there also. But the dead are beginning to rise and forces a brother and sister out for a jog to team up with a couple criminals to survive the onslaught of zombies that are attacking. The group tries to use their cars to escape but that makes little difference as the numbers of undead begin to rise. Another independent zombie film that doesn’t exactly separate itself from the growing number of other Indy zombie films out there. They all have ‘good concepts’ but just don’t find a way to pull it off. I give the film 1 ½ out of 4 stars and you can find more out at www.foxtrotprodfilms.com .

 

The Plague 2: Biohazard Blood (DVD) – Two survivors from the first film, Becky and Jill are roaming the wasteland as the plague spread quickly through the cities and world. The world fell apart quickly as the Love Canal incident turned into full fledge zombie apocalypse. Or the filmmaker just has watched too much of “The Walking Dead”? As Becky and Jill see signs for salvation and travel to the destination until they cross a father whose child was taken from him because they escaped the sanctuary. Becky and Jill choose to help and rescue the daughter and disband this so-called sanctuary. The sequel seem to be less bloody, boring, and a “Walking Dead” clone done very cheaply as I give it 1 out of 4 stars. You can find out more about flick at www.foxtrotprodfilms.com .

 

Les Paterson Saves the World (VHS/YouTube) – A bumbling idiot that is the Australian diplomat farts while on stage during a conference and catches another diplomat on fire. As punishment he is sent to the Middle East as a favor so he could be tortured and killed. But being a complete idiot and totally unaware he escapes and helps a Russian plot to proceed. The Russian plot is a Bio-weapon of super herpes via toilet seats being placed in the Pentagon so it could infect all Americans. The diabolical plan can only be stopped by the bumbling idiot or the U.S. president Joan Rivers to give up one squillion dollars for the antidote. The 1987 film has its moments that include Hugh Keays-Byrne in leather and Barry Humphries also starring as a woman who works for the C.I.A. trying to defuse the situation. A weird comedy that I know I didn’t get all of the humor but was just glad to watch something a little different than the usual so I give it 2 stars.

 

Rise of the Footsoldier (DVD) – The film is based on a true life tough guy named Carlton Leach who rose through the ranks of feared criminals. His main business was violence and crime during the 80s and 90s. If someone needed protected, drugs sold, guns, someone beaten up? Carlton and his boys were the ones to contact if you had the cash. Leach made a living off of this for many years until some peers of his were killed in a vicious shooting that one of his friends said they were retiring. The UK accent is very thick in this film where they should have had some subtitles at times but if you are a fan of mob flicks this might be something up your alley? I give the movie 2 stars.

 

The Sisterhood (DVD) – Another Philippines post-apocalyptic flick produced from the Roger Corman Company that is about women with special powers after the nuclear holocaust. The year is 2021 and a woman and her village have just been raided by some raiders and her brother was killed. Two women warriors from a group “The Sisterhood” come by and help the young lady. The warriors of The Sisterhood are considered outcasts or witches and decide they will help track down the raiders that did this horrible deed. The female warriors believe in freedom and will put an end to the men’s’ terror with or without the help of the war wagon they find. Quite a fun post-apocalyptic B-movie that doesn’t look like it has much going for it and for that I give it 2 stars.

 

Any comments or questions please send to grossmoviereview@verizon.netor www.facebook.com/grossmoviereviews . Remember folks always support your local independent movie theater, independent video store, and independent filmmakers! It will keep horror alive………

Don’t forget you can also hear Kyle Poling and me talking about horror flicks on a weekly basis on the Bloodbaths and Boomsticks podcast at: www.bloodbathspodcast.blogspot.com/ also available at http://www.stitcher.com/podcast/kyle-poling-2/bloodbaths-and-boomsticks?refid=stpr

 

Plus you can always go to the greatest T-shirt place online or if you are in Texas visit the store of “Fast Custom Shirts” where T-shirt Joe is the only place you should purchase your horror T-shirts: Go to www.fastcustomshirts.com for details.

 

See yinz at GROSSFEST! July 28, 2018! Go check out www.grossfest.com for all the details! 

Gross Movie Reviews #433

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Gross Movie Reviews #433

 

Black Water (DVD) – We have a killer action flick on a super-secret sub starring Jean Claude Van Damme, Dolph Lundgren, and Patrick Kilpatrick. JCVD is Wheeler who gets caught up in a double cross over a thumb-drive that has secrets that can be sold worldwide. Patrick Kilpatrick is the man who has brought him in and transporting him on a C.I.A. black ops sub that doesn’t exist. Wheeler’s neighboring cellmate just happens to be a German named Marco played by Dolph who cannot be killed because he knows too much and may be to high profile? When things get double-crossed again and no one to trust as people are being killed on the sub Wheeler turns to Marco for help. The movie plays out like “Under Siege” on a sub which isn’t a bad thing. The film is a lot of fun especially because of the Marco character but just feel more could have been done with this action flick. It’s good but not great and potential to be great as I give it 2 ½ stars.

 

Blood Moon (VHS) – An Australian slasher film from 1990 about an all-girls Catholic high school and its students being stalked and killed by an unknown killer. When a girl and her boyfriend disappear no one blinks an eye except for her best friend who feels something could be going on? But honestly she isn’t too worried as she goes to a dance and meets a dreamy dude who snuck into their dance. Soon more girls disappear and the police begin snooping around a creepy Science teacher who he and his wife have a secret? This flick is your scraping the barrel kind of slasher film that doesn’t have much substance. Remember its 1990 so I am sure this was made on mostly on the cheap. I give it 1 ½ stars.

 

The Raiders of Atlantis (DVD) – Hey remember that “Cannibal Holocaust” Deodato dude? Well he made a bunch of other movies for those who may not know. And this gem is a wonderful must-see mess! Released in 1983 under the title “Atlantis Interceptors” in some countries takes “The Road Warrior” rip-off to a whole other off the wall level. Off the coast of Florida some scientists have found an artifact at the bottom of the ocean that proves the existence of Atlantis. They are going to try and move a sunken Russian sub to investigate more. When moved, the sea floor opens, a tidal wave destroys the scientific ocean platform, and a biker gang led by ‘fish bowl man’ begins murdering people on the mainland. The “Atlantis Interceptors” are back to take the mainland from these dumb humans! Never mind asking why they have customized motorcycles with swords on them and cars with guns on them? Just except this mess of a plot hole and thank me later for enjoying a great post-apocalyptic movie about two dudes trying to save the world by flying into Atlantis and fucking shit up! I give it 3 ½ stars.

 

Kindergarten Cop 2 (DVD) – So twenty some years later they decided to make a sequel with Dolph Lundgren. Dolph is a F.B.I. agent who goes undercover to question six year olds about a flash drive their old teacher may have hidden? The drive has all the identities of everyone in witness protection. Of course hijinks ensue but not nearly as funny as the original from 1990 starring Arnold. But it had Dolph so I know I am in it for at least one watch as I give it 1 ½ stars.

Welcome to Willits (DVD) – This odd horror flick was a very nice little surprise from 2016. A girl (Anastasia Baranova from “Z Nation”) home from college in her little Northern California town has an uncle and aunt that have a huge weed crop they protect. Her uncle believes aliens are trying to steal his crop and do weird shit to him. This all started when he substituted something in his batch of meth not too long ago and his visions of aliens and a Dolph Lundgren cop show ‘Fists of Justice’ continue to get worse. What doesn’t help is some campers are staying nearby and stumble upon the crop and war is declared as the uncle believes he is killing aliens. This flick is a funny and unexpected gore fest! To give an extra twist is Rory Culkin who shows up as the weird hitchhiker picked up by the campers to give it that extra creep but fun horror factor. Movie fans this is well worth tracking down as I give it 3 stars.

 

In the Name of the King 2: Two Worlds (DVD) – Since I have seen one and three it was only fair I eventually checked out the Uwe Boll sequel starring Dolph Lundgren. Dolph is Granger in present day. Granger gets pulled into a time warp which takes him to a distant time where he is called “The Chosen One”. He is deceived into thinking he must go up a mountain and kill the ‘Holy Mother’ who leads the ‘Dark Ones’. But he finds out the truth from the Holy Mother that he is placed into the future as an orphan to potentially return and save them all from the evil king who has deceived all who follow him. Granger’s future world depends on him stopping the king’s evil plan of a plague. Apparently they ran out of Jason Statham money and Uwe Boll had a leftover script from his “House of the Dead” projects and you have this… I give the fantasy flick 1 star.

 

4 Got 10 (DVD) – Dolph Lundgren, Danny Trejo, and Michael Pare are all wrapped up together in this tale of a man who forgets who he is and has a van full of drugs and money. As the man tries to remember what happened, a crooked cop kills the wrong partner and a DEA agent and a drug lord have questions. Your typical direct-to-HULU/NETFLIX jams for weirdoes like me who believe those three names are always gold for action flicks. Or at least worth one watch as I give it 2 stars.

 

Children of the Corn: Runaway (DVD) – So John Gulager needed a paycheck so “hey we need someone to direct the ninth entry into this useless series only Tim Gross watches?” A woman named Ruth is trying to escape her past with a cult that killed all their parents over a decade ago. She left when pregnant so her son would have a chance in the normal world. Of course evil has followed her and wants her son. The film isn’t terrible but if you are having trouble sleeping this might help you as I give it 1 star.

 

Hellraiser: Judgment (DVD) – Of course this tenth entry sucked a huge double bag of dicks! Think remake of the fifth entry “Inferno”? If you remotely know what I am talking about please turn away and don’t watch because it will make you feel stupid and angry. For the love of DOUG BRADLEY, $350,000 budget! Thank you Dimension Films for releasing another hot pile donkey shit into the world and just insulting horror movie fans, Clive Barker, and humans in general. Worst movie of 2018! Wait question what is worse? Jeepers Creepers 3 or this entry into the so-called Hellraiser series? Hold on I think I need to go drown myself in the tub while I slit my wrists at the same time. Crap film gets crap move on folks.

Surviving Evil (DVD) – So Billy Zane plays an adventure dude who does a survival show for a cable channel. Zane and his crew head to a supposedly haunted island in the Philippines to shoot their latest episode of the TV show. One of the crew knows of the legends on the island but is choosing to ignore them as he has other motives of why he is there. This crew member knows of Japanese gold that is hidden on the island and is willing to risk his friends and his own life for the payoff. But the legend becomes real when shape-shifting tribe of demons show up and sniff out one of the crew is pregnant. Apparently pregnant women to these cool demons are Yuengling to me? The movie has some great build up, Billy Zane being Billy Zane, lots of gore, and really interesting demon things! This pleasant horror film feels like a really awesome SyFy Channel film that was too awesome to be on the “Sharknado” network. This film gets 3 really kick ass demon stars.

 

Kickboxer: Retaliation (DVD) – In case you haven’t had your fill of these movies JCVD’s character Durand is blinded by a fight promoter and must help Kurt Sloane train again. But this isn’t any ordinary fight as the fight promoter is Christopher Lambert and he is a ruthless rich bastard that wants Sloan to fight a chemically enhanced fighter. So Lambert kidnaps Sloan’s wife and gets Sloan arrested and thrown into a Bangkok prison. There Sloan trains with Mike Tyson and JCVD now that he has no choice to defend his title. If you are an action film fan this will be your bonerjam or your Viagra until they give us another Jason Statham action flick? Really enjoying JCVD doing another one of these as I give it 3 stars and yes Mike Tyson still looks scary even when he is acting.

 

Dune Warriors (DVD) – A post-apocalyptic B-movie mess from 1990, the Corman group producing, and stars David Carradine. A small village is being taken over by some warlords for their water. A woman in the village has had enough and goes out to hire five warriors to help defend the village. If you like watching dumb ass shit like me you’ll enjoy it. Let’s just say it isn’t “Deathsport” or “Battletruck”. I give it barely one Carradine as he was barely there for the paycheck.

 

Lunatics: A Love Story (DVD) – This oddity is truly a love story that stars Ted Raimi as Hank, who is a writer and has not left his apartment in six months. A huge part of it is he keeps having delusions of spiders and a doctor (Bruce Campbell) trying to cut him or give him a shot. His life changes when he believes he is calling a dating line and it happens to be a pay phone. The phone is picked up by Deborah Foreman’s character Nancy, who believes she is a jinx. She just got done getting thrown out of her hotel room, dumped by her boyfriend, and shot a gang member in the foot. On a whim Nancy accepts Hank’s invite to his apartment. Nancy tries to look past all the foil and Hank’s weirdness and they connect for their love of poetry. But Nancy believing she is a jinx runs away only to force Hank to overcome his fear of leaving the apartment to go get the girl. Josh Becker put together a hilarious tale with a great cast that I believe the studios were unsure of how to advertise. When someone brings up you should watch a love story with them go with this flick as I give it 3 ½ stars and you won’t be disappointed or bored.

 

Nightflyers (VHS) – I keep getting this confused with the Stephen Machet flick with killer bats. But this is the 1987 space flick starring Catherine Mary Stewart who is a part of a crew that gets on a ship that might be alive? They are off on a mission and become more curious as they never meet the captain and the Class 10 telepath on board keeps warning them bad shit is going to happen to them. The ship computer controls everything including her son Royd who must have seen “The Last Starfighter” and “Night of the Comet” and realizes how hot Ms. Stewart is and begins to converse with her. Some boring space shit happens, then the ship tries to kill them all, and we get a scene where the telepath gets his face cut in half by a laser “Intruder-style”. Outside of the really cool death by laser scene; the movie seems to suffer several things including many rewrites most likely. But hey it is being remade into a TV show so there is that as I give this flick 1 ½ stars.

 

Argoman: The Fantastic Superman (YouTube) – Oh the shit I couldn’t make up? Sir Reginald Hoover is Argoman. An Italian Batman clone who believes saving the world and keeping peace. But also he loses his powers for six hours if he bangs hot women of 1967. Argoman’s nemesis Jenabell is busy stealing a crown and forcing France to give her all their money. When that isn’t going on Sir Reginald is busy boning Jenabell and will capture her when the time is right. The rest of the movie is Argoman escaping custody and just seeing what else he can do for fun with his amazing powers. The movie doesn’t a whole lick of sense but I was entertained and laughed several times and for that I give it 2 stars.

 

Any comments or questions please send to grossmoviereview@verizon.netor www.facebook.com/grossmoviereviews . Remember folks always support your local independent movie theater, independent video store, and independent filmmakers! It will keep horror alive………

Don’t forget you can also hear Kyle Poling and me talking about horror flicks on a weekly basis on the Bloodbaths and Boomsticks podcast at: www.bloodbathspodcast.blogspot.com/ also available at http://www.stitcher.com/podcast/kyle-poling-2/bloodbaths-and-boomsticks?refid=stpr

 

Plus you can always go to the greatest T-shirt place online or if you are in Texas visit the store of “Fast Custom Shirts” where T-shirt Joe is the only place you should purchase your horror T-shirts: Go to www.fastcustomshirts.com for details.

 

See yinz at GROSSFEST! July 28, 2018! Go check out www.grossfest.com for all the details! 

Gross Movie Reviews #430

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Gross Movie Reviews #430

 

Gnome Alone (DVD) – A wonderful B-movie starring Vern Troyer as an “evil gnome” who is part of a curse and a mark that has been passed down through several generations. You wish for someone to be horribly disfigured this ugly gnome goes and takes care of it. When an old bag lady is run down by a drunken frat boy Zoe a store clerk has the mark/evil gnome passed on to her. Wanting revenge and police not helping people that were involved with the accident and the cover up begin to die and Zoe is the one to blame. It’s hilarious and corny and well worth curiosity as I give the pint-sized horror flick 2 ½ stars.

 

The Traveler (DVD) – So this movie from filmmaker Jonathan R. Skocik came to me in the mail the other day. Never mind it surprised me but it was an independent film I pooped all over back in 2006. So I took it as a sign that it was time to rewatch this Indy film and give it another chance. It is supposedly an all-new director’s cut of the film being released. Can’t hurt… But for those who don’t know the film it centers on a couple who have car troubles and find themselves at the ‘death house’ looking for help? But a few other people are already there to hang and do graffiti. To their surprise a stranger shows up explaining the only way to leave the house is to be the only one left. Each time he shows up they must vote on who dies. Of course their deaths are not swift but very torturous. As usual not my cup of tea or Indy flick but I can say this isn’t the worst movie I have seen as I said in 2006 as other horrible films have been released since: “The Christmas Season Massacre” being one of them. The acting isn’t terrible, some of the effects are good, but in the end I still don’t like the film too much. But hey people go check it out and you decide if I am right as you can find out more about the movie and the filmmaker at: www.facebook.com/BlackBootProductions .

 

The Lonely Ones (DVD) – A group of young friends head to a cabin to party and tell scary stories to each other. Some strange creatures or I should say ghouls show up to crash the party. Sounds like a fun horror film but fails as the film is a bit dull. It wastes a lot of time setting up the story between a cheating boyfriend and the girl he is trying to get back with. The ghoul idea and the weird biker dude is interesting but again the whole relationship thing drags this horror to a slow haul. For that I can only give this flick about ghouls 1 star.

Robowar (DVD-R) – Oh Vincent Dawn aka Bruno Mattei I so enjoy the messes you call movies. Don’t walk but run to your computer for this 1988 gem as Mr. Dawn pretty much made a scene for scene ‘Predator’ rip-off. Yeah, it’s not as good as that great flick with Arnold but this stars a racist robot! A strike force is sent into the jungle on a secret mission where they are to face-off with a robotics experiment gone wrong. Omega One is the robot’s name and looks like a cross between Charlie Sheen’s suit from “The Wraith” and a suit they may have stolen from Full Moon’s “Mandroid”. When Omega One isn’t destroying the strike force its busy wandering the jungle repeating, “Greasy” the whole time. A big flaming piece crap? Yes it is! Will I watch it again? Damn right I will as I give it 3 stars just because I am still laughing.

 

Pulse (DVD) – Little Joey Lawrence goes to visit his dad in California for the summer. Only problem Joey wasn’t there to be haunted by a smart pulse of electricity trying to kill him and move on to the next house. Joey spends much of the movie trying to convince his father and other people it’s real until some major accidents happen. Then we have one last showdown between the pulse of electricity and the tag team of Joey and his father. If you are a fan of TV horror movies you will enjoy this as I give it 2 ½ stars.

 

Axe Massacre (DVD) – A holiday horror short film where a masked Santa Claus climbs down the chimney unannounced to slaughter a family on the holy night. Fun stuff and looks cool but why did he do it and why the mask? I give this short film 1 ½ stars.

 

Machete Maidens Unleashed (DVD) – An amazing documentary that features what it was like to shoot and produce films in the 60s, 70s, and early 80s in the Philippines. Sets were built for you, labor was cheap, no laws enforced there, and Roger Corman took full advantage of this situation to produce many films and start several careers. A good portion of the documentary deals with the actresses of this time, one of them being Pam Grier who also took full advantage of the opportunity. Lots of Sid Haig and they explain why the age of filming in the Philippines went away. I give this excellent piece of history 4 stars.

 

Trailer War (DVD) – This collection of trailers really centers on some unknowns and B-movies favorites that feature Craig Sheffer, David Carradine, Donald Pleasence, Henry Silva, Hal Holbrook. This collection digs deep in the vault for films like: Inframan, The Dungeon Master, World War of Kung Fu, The Man From Hong Kong, Force: Five, Maniac Cop 2, Partners, Nightmare Honeymoon, The Scaremaker, and Shoot. If you got two hours to kill and enjoy watching trailers this is the DVD for you as I give it 3 stars.

 

Any comments or questions please send to grossmoviereview@verizon.netor www.facebook.com/grossmoviereviews . Remember folks always support your local independent movie theater, independent video store, and independent filmmakers! It will keep horror alive………

Don’t forget you can also hear Kyle Poling and me talking about horror flicks on a weekly basis on the Bloodbaths and Boomsticks podcast at: www.bloodbathspodcast.blogspot.com/ also available at http://www.stitcher.com/podcast/kyle-poling-2/bloodbaths-and-boomsticks?refid=stpr

 

Plus you can always go to the greatest T-shirt place online or if you are in Texas visit the store of “Fast Custom Shirts” where T-shirt Joe is the only place you should purchase your horror T-shirts: Go to www.fastcustomshirts.com for details.

 

Oh it’s real and it’s happening… GROSSFEST! July 28, 2018! Go check out www.grossfest.com for all the details! 

Gross Movie Reviews #429

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Gross Movie Reviews #429

 

Vengeance Runs Red (Vimeo) – A short film from filmmaker Philip Brocklehurst that tells the story of two who men who are haunted by a past mistake. A young dude takes upon himself to serve justice that is due. I give it 2 ½ out of 4 stars. Want to find out more go here: www.facebook.com/philip.brocklehurst.9

 

War of the Dead (DVD) – The film isn’t horrible but it’s not great either. The film is just another run of the mill Nazi zombie flick that isn’t very memorable. Sorry horror folk no “Outpost”, “Dead Snow”, or “Frankenstein’s Army” here. Just keep moving along as I give this flick 1 ½ stars.

 

The Rezort (DVD) – Another fun take on the zombie genre from the UK I believe? Ten years has passed since some worldwide virus turns millions of humans into zombies. The antidote was introduced to everywhere except one island. This island has now become a ‘Jurassic Park’ of zombies where some big corporation got the idea of if you got the money they have the zombies to shoot and kill. But no one thinks how are they resupplying the stock of zombies? The story mainly revolves a woman whose father was killed during riots when the zombie virus first started to spread. She believes going to this island will get her over her nightmares and fears? Once there she has faced her fears but wasn’t counting on the zombies getting loose in the park and begin feasting on all vacationing there. Now, she and a small group of others have five hours to get off the island before the military levels the island! A wildly entertaining zombie flick folks as I give it 3 ½ stars.

 

Nemesis 3: Time Lapse (VHS) – I got bored and decided to fall down the Albert Pyun wormhole again and watched these not needed sci-fi sequels that feature Tim Thomerson and Sue Price. In this mid-90s sequel Sue Price is searching out and destroying cyborgs as Tim Thomerson keeps a watchful eye over her for Central Command. Central Command wants her alive at all costs. Really folks not a whole lot happens in this flick but if you are a Tim Thomerson fan I totally get why you would track this bad boy down as I give it 1 ½ stars. The film also is known as “Nemesis 3: Prey Harder”.

 

Nemesis 4: Cry of Angels (VHS) – Albert Pyun brings back Sue Price one more time for what I like to call “Nemesis 4: Sue Price Bangs all the Cyborgs”. Never mind Andrew Divoff’s head speaks about cyborg non-sense throughout the movie. Sue Price’s goal in 2080 apparently is to be naked and bump uglies with all the cyborgs and then kill them. I believe the alternative title to this flick was actually “Hardbodies 3”? But that couldn’t be confirmed or denied at this time. But the gist of the flick this time around is Price’s character fucked up at some point and now there are Hunters all over her naked muscle bound ass! It wasn’t a great flick but it was a hell of a lot more interesting than the last sequel where she sat in a desert for about 75% of the damn movie. I give the flick 2 stars and you may also find this movie under the title “Death Angel” in some countries…

Swiss Army Man (DVD) – Possibly the most bizarre, completely entertaining, and glorious film you will ever watch in your life. I do not say that lightly. Daniel Radcliffe said it best on a late night talk show, “It’s a film about farting, erections, and a dead guy.” If you do not find that funny: one, this isn’t the film for you and two, you are most likely dead inside? The film begins with a young man played Paul Dano who is trapped on a small island trying to hang himself until he sees a dead body wash up on shore. Its Manny aka Daniel Radcliffe and once he begins farting Dano’s character rides him across the water to freedom and onto an adventure that will blow your mind. They become friends, eat out, share stories, start fires, and fight a bear. You get the picture? If you haven’t witnessed this film yet make it so because the ending makes the movie even more bizarre and fun. I give this hilarious flick 4 stars farting all the way.

 

Avenging Force (DVD) – One of Michael Dudikoff’s better action flicks outside of the “American Ninja” saga. Dudikoff’s buddy, Steven James of course is running for senate. Until some rich white racist dudes with their leader John P. Ryan decide to kill him and his family. On top of that they make Dudikoff play “Surviving the Game” eight years before Ice-T did! This 80s action flick will satisfy your action flick hunger if needed as I give it 3 stars.

 

Love Eternal: The Silent Film Cut (YouTube) – Forte Films Entertainment as at it again flaunting their filmmaking talents with a cool throwback short film version of Dracula and Mina. Done their way they give ‘silent era film buffs’ a tasty treat. Wonderfully done this filmmaking group needs more support and money because I would love to see these guys making a couple features a year. I give this fun treat 3 out of 4 stars and you can find out more at: www.fortefilmsentertainment.com .

Explorers (DVD) – Holy crap folks I do not know how I missed this 1985 flick starring Ethan Hawke and River Phoenix. This was so in my wheelhouse. But after reading some of the info on it and how it was considered a flop maybe somehow it fell off my cable watching radar as a kid? Apparently this movie was over 3 hours long and I believe Paramount Studios were like “nope”, not happening Joe Dante. The film is reportedly unfinished but a finished product. Very strange stuff but anyway folks the story centers on Ethan Hawke who has a weird dream about aliens and an image. He draws it and shows it to his best friend who of course is the nerdy kid down the street doing experiments in his basement. Hawke’s character continues to have these weird dreams and once his two friends become a part of it and his nerdy best friend uses a computer to make a bubble they decide its plans for a spaceship. The spaceship consists of a trash can, an old carnival ride, microwave doors, and a computer in the movie that didn’t exist in reality but was built just for this movie. They fly around and fuck shit up until Dick Miller finds them and eventually go off planet to meet the aliens. Really not too much to the movie but it is a fun glorious kick in the ass of childhood if you are a 80s kid? I give the entertaining film 3 stars.

 

Any comments or questions please send to grossmoviereview@verizon.netor www.facebook.com/grossmoviereviews . Remember folks always support your local independent movie theater, independent video store, and independent filmmakers! It will keep horror alive………

Don’t forget you can also hear Kyle Poling and me talking about horror flicks on a weekly basis on the Bloodbaths and Boomsticks podcast at: www.bloodbathspodcast.blogspot.com/ also available at http://www.stitcher.com/podcast/kyle-poling-2/bloodbaths-and-boomsticks?refid=stpr

 

Plus you can always go to the greatest T-shirt place online or if you are in Texas visit the store of “Fast Custom Shirts” where T-shirt Joe is the only place you should purchase your horror T-shirts: Go to www.fastcustomshirts.com for details.

 

Oh its real and its happening… GROSSFEST! July 28, 2018! Go check out www.grossfest.com for all the details!