We finally release all our weekly podcasts we been doing (hahaha)

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This week we talk about another 3 genre flicks.  The first being THE STEPFATHER,  a classic that Kyle has never seen even though it stars Jill Schoelin his #1 scream queen.  Then we talk about a really weird whack-a-doo police story/serial killer flick in SLAUGHTER OF THE INNOCENTS.  And finally we chat up a Netflix based quasi found footage movie in DEMONIC.  We answer your questions and read all the news that went down during the week.  So, download this episode and make old Scott Glenn happy.

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This week we are talking about 3 more flicks unearthed from the dusty aisles of the video store.  First we have a sequel of an all time horror jam in THE STEPFATHER 2.  Directed by our good buddy Jeff Burr.  Then we go to the roller derby in the excellent UNHOLY ROLLERS.  And finally we cover a truly oddball film in which Squiggy from Laverne & Shirley dresses as a clown, climbs a tower, and goes on a shooting rampage at an amusement park in the “comedy” FUNLAND.  We also read all the news that was fit to print (or make up) this week.  And as always we answer all your listener questions.

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This week we have 3 more flicks to bend your mind.  First we have Nazis invading a keep only to find a kick ass monster in another Scott Glenn jam in THE KEEP.  Then we cover Kyle’s all time Schwarzenegger flick in THE RUNNING MAN.  And lastly we have a weird giallo flick from the director of Cannibal Holocaust that stars all-time great Donald Pleasence in PHANTOM OF DEATH.  Along the way we talk about some new news things and as always we answer all your listener questions.  So be like Captain Freedom and download this episode.

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This time around we have yet another 3 flicks to split your wig.  First we watch a truly bizarre flick featuring puppets, Coleco-Vision, public sex, liquor sandwiches, and phantasm spheres in NIGHTMARE WEEKEND.  Next we talk about zombie animals in ZOOMBIES 2.  And lastly we cover a live action adaptation of a very popular anime series in FIST OF THE NORTH STAR.  And as always we chat over the news and read your listener questions.  So, download this episode or Big Van Vader will beat you up and take your lunch money.

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This week we hand pick another 3 flicks out of the dustbin of the internet for review.  First we try really hard for Tim to get into the trailer bark boys, but ultimately Tim fucks it up as we talk about TRAILER PARK BOYS: COUNTDOWN TO LIQUOR DAY.  Then we talk of a tale of witches in the woods in EYES OF FIRE.  And lastly Kyle’s Dad (Roy Schneider) flips helicopters in BLUE THUNDER.  And as we do every week we talk about all the newest news and answer your listener questions.  So download this episode and get a physics lesson on the proper way to do sweet loop-de-loops in helicopters.

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 This week it is with heave hearts we do the show because we lost a true legend.   As Tim always says “The Man, The Myth, The Legend” Rutger Hauer has passed on.  So we honor the man by reviewing 4 of his flicks.  First we have the very nekkid Jennifer Jason Lee and Rutger Hauer storming’ castles and fucking everywhere in the Paul Veerhoven directed FLESH AND BLOOD.   Then we have a spy thriller starring everyone including Craig T. Nelson’s porn stache in THE OSTERMAN WEEKEND.  Then we have a pile of straight to video garbage in TURBULENCE 3: HEAVY METAL.  And bringing up the rear we have the Canadian grindhouse influenced HOBO WITH A SHOTGUN.  So join us in honoring the legend that was Rutger Hauer.

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This week Tim starts his 3 week suspension handed down from Karen the head of podcasting H.R.  so Kyle and John fall back on a familiar topic… BONER JAMZ!!!  First we have a flick neither one of us has seen in SPLITZ from 1987.  Then we move on to an out of the box kinda boner jam in GHOULIES 3: GHOULIES GO TO COLLEGE (HEY!  It’s got boobs, college shenanigans, and gross out humor so it counts as a boner jam in my book)  And lastly a real hum dinger in the movie that has to have the most hair gel ever used in a production in VALET GIRLS.  Also we cover the news and we read all of your viewer mail.  So download the episode or CBGB’s will shut down… oh wait!

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This week Tim serves his 2nd week of forced podcast suspension but Kyle and john are here to pick up the slack with a couple fine flicks you may have missed over the last few years.  First the hostage based cannibal splatter movie GRAVY from 2015.  Then we chat about MA starring the fantastic Octavia Spencer.  And as always we answer your questions and cover all the news that was fit to print.  So, download this episode or this podcast will eat you.  #FreeTimGross

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Two new episodes of Bloodbaths and Boomsticks is up

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This week we tear into 3 more genre flicks.  First we have an Australian conspiracy flick featuring our favorite dude Donald Pleasence in GROUND ZERO.  Then we chat about a regional drive in oddity featuring a mutated sheep monster doing what a mutated sheep monster does best in GOD MONSTER OF INDIAN FLATS.  And lastly Kyle forgets which one of his favorite Mexican actors stars in this hard sci fi slick PROSPECT.  We also talk about the newest news, and all the regular jazz.

 

http://bloodbathspodcast.blogspot.com/

 

This week Kyle gets called into podcast human resources to have a “talk” as we mourn the deaths of Larry Cohen and John Carl Beuchler.  But it’s not all gloom and doom as we will be covering 3 more genre flicks.  First Kyle covers the Netflix jam LOVE, DEATH AND ROBOTS as he gets his animation on.  Then John picks an all-time 80’s boner jam in UP THE CREEK.  And lastly Tim chats about a semi lost bit of sci fi from the darkest depths of the video store in DARK SIDE OF THE MOON.  Also we hit up all the news that is fit to print (or make up if you’re bloody disgusting). So download this episode or all our Rondo awards will evaporate.

 

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Gross Movie Reviews #466

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Gross Movie Reviews #466

A Meowy Halloween (DVD) – Steve Rudzinski digs deep into his comedy bag to bring you this little gem about a talking cat named Whiskers and its owner Wally. Wally just happens to be a police detective and a man whose family was cursed many years ago. If Wally isn’t spitting candy corn out of the car he is busy with his stakeout of a possible witch in the neighborhood. But Whiskers as much scarier things going on at home as the cat believes the strange things that are happening are the work of a haunting. And Whiskers will stop at nothing to have the ghosts removed as long as Wally’s credit card covers the cost? Yes, the movie is completely silly but once again Steve and crew prove it doesn’t all have to be about horror as they pull a family film out of thin air. If by some chance you been living under a rock and have not seen any of Steve’s movies it is time for you to visit www.silverspotlightfilms.moonfruit.com as I give this 3 out of 4 stars.

 

American Poltergeist: The Curse of Lilith Ratchet (DVD) – The curse was me sitting through this dull ass flick. But anyway a couple young women steal a shrunken head and sell it to a so-called paranormal expert. He uses the head for PR stunt for his upcoming show. The expert, Hunter Perry, gets attendees to play hot potato with the shrunken head and once eliminated from the game Lilith Ratchet soon comes to eliminate them in real life. Oh this horrific as I give it one star. The film isn’t as bad as it is dull.

 

Urban Warriors (YouTube) – Just another Italian post-apocalyptic flick where three research techs survive a nuclear war in their underground lab. They dig their asses out of the underground lab only to find things have changed. The world is fucked and it is filled with cannibalistic, leather-clad, motorcycle gangs where normal people are hard to come by. But that does not stop Brad of the research team to try to survive and save the human race. If you are lucky you get to see this film with the Michael Dudikoff introduction as this flick lacks the fun that most Italian post-apocalyptic films are when watching. This film suffers from “it could have been better even with its low budget” but hey shit happens as I give it 1 ½ stars.

 

Galaxy of the Dinosaurs (DVD) – One of JR Bookwalter’s early 90s films made for nearly nothing that has a group of space travelers trapped on the unknown world of Gurgon. Or just somewhere out in the middle of the woods of Somewhere, Ohio. The space travelers must deal with the dinosaurs that are trying to eat them as they must figure a way off the planet. A hilariously bad movie that apparently has a few stories behind it from I have heard from some Bookwalter fans as I give it one star.

 

Godmonster of Indian Flats (YouTube/DVD) – Possibly one of the most random films about a mutant sheep attacking a small town. This western horror flick is about a young farm dude named Eddie and a university professor named Dr. Clemens. A giant bloody embryo is found next to Eddie in the sheep pin after a bad night on the town. Dr. Clemens convinces Eddie to take it to his lab so he can research it. But soon it mutates, hatches, and terrorizes the small western town as they were going to use it as a sideshow attraction to make money for the town. The movie isn’t real good but the monster is actually really cool looking and makes the film entertaining enough to stick it out as I give the flick 2 stars.

 

Ground Zero (DVD) – A film somewhat based on fact has a second generation cameraman Harvey getting mixed up with the royal commission in 1984. They are investigating the claims of aborigines being left in the way of the blasts from nine A-bombs during the late 50s into the 60s. Harvey doesn’t pay too much attention to this until the government comes knocking at his door knowing his father was the cameraman for the tests. And his father may have hidden away some incriminating evidence of the event somewhere in an old film can. Mr. Denton gets neck deep into the investigating after he finds out his father was murdered twenty years ago and believes his answer is out in the desert where his father’s old friend lives. Donald Pleasence happy to see the young Denton explains the events and how his father got mixed up with it. In the end Harvey’s effort is useless but the ending of what happened to the lost footage makes the movie that much more interesting as I give it 2 ½ stars.

 

Once Upon a Time at Christmas (DVD) – December 14th marks the day that Santa and his Miss Claus begin their murder spree in Woodridge, New York. The small town police have trouble piecing together why the murders are taking place. But when they figure out it the murders are traced to the 12 days of Christmas they have the clue they needed for the killer Santa. Apparently Nick Conway is a military vet that lost his mind and eventually had a bitter divorce. This leads Nick looking for his daughter so they can be a family again. Another holiday slasher to add to your favorites list when Christmas rolls around as I give it 2 stars.

 

Future Zone (DVD) – For those who pay attention this B-movie sequel to “Future Force” have David Carradine’s character John Tucker facing off with a drug lord. John’s son Billy travels 30 years from the future to help his father live another day and bring down the drug lord. The film has it all David A. Prior directing, Charles Napier is the mayor, and Carradine using a Nintendo power glove to blow things up equals B-movie gold as I give it 2 ½ stars.

 

The Darkside of the Moon (YouTube/DVD) – The year is 2022 and a ship called Spacecore-1 is on a dangerous mission of fixing satellites in orbit. The ship has a malfunction and they drift to the dark side of the moon where communications fail. The crew has about 24 hours to get things up and running again or they will run out of air. As they are floating out in space they come across a NASA shuttle that hasn’t been seen in 30 years. They board it in hopes of using it to fix their ship’s problems only to find a dead body aboard the shuttle. The crew brings it back and several weird things begin to happen to the crew members while they are alone. Who is it? What is it? When the dead body comes to life it seems the devil is among them and this has some connection to the Bermuda Triangle back on Earth. A pretty solid flick that feels like a 80s Corman sci-fi flick but isn’t. One of those films that got lost in the direct-to-video shuffle during the early 90s as I give it 3 stars.

 

Captain Marvel (Theater) – Carol Danvers becomes a powerful superhero by accident when testing a secret plane for an air force scientist. It is set in the 90s and meant to connect Nick Fury, the Avengers, S.H.I.E.L.D, and a few other things for the Marvel movie fans. But like the “Thor” films before it the film is mostly just a ‘place holder’ until the real action begins with the next “Avengers” film. “Captain Marvel” is entertaining but not memorable as I give the big popcorn flick 3 stars as it makes me wanting the “Avengers” movie to come sooner than later. Again it’s no “Iron Man” or “Black Panther” but not much is?

 

Aquaman (DVD) – Arthur aka Aquaman must come back home to Atlantis to claim his kingdom before it is taken by his brother and he uses it to declare war on the rest of the world. The movie doesn’t take itself too serious and much more entertaining than the serious DC “Superman” and “Batman” flicks. If that wasn’t enough it does have Dolph Lundgren and Willem Dafoe in important roles which I am always a fan of those guys! DC pay attention yinz did something right here with Aquaman and Wonder Woman as I give this flick 3 ½ stars.

Spider-man: Into the Spider-verse (On Demand) – An absolute fun animated film with not your usual storyline. A young teen Miles Morales is bitten by a spider while working on his artwork in the subway with his uncle. Soon his world is flipped upside down when he meets Peter Parker and he is going to show Miles the ropes of being a Spider-man. But while Parker is fighting Kingpin he dies and Miles promises Peter he will destroy Fisk’s super-collider. Fisk wants his family back so bad he is willing to destroy the city of New York and possibly all of reality. But with the open portal to other realities several Spider-people come from parallel universes and they must help Miles face off against Kingpin and shut down the collider. The story of Miles is perfect as he must now be the Spider-man of his dimension. Two things made this film absolutely perfect for me. First, one of the alternate Spider-men is Peter B. Parker who is mid-40s, divorced, and out of shape. Second, spoiler alert people I finally get an appearance of Spider-man 2099 in a movie! This flick gets four stars all the way and I hope to see a possible sequel or just another story to expand this universe.

 

Any comments or questions please send to grossmoviereview@verizon.netor www.facebook.com/grossmoviereviews . Remember folks always support your local independent movie theater, independent video store, and independent filmmakers! It will keep horror alive………

Don’t forget you can also hear Kyle Poling and me talking about horror flicks on a weekly basis on the Bloodbaths and Boomsticks podcast at: www.bloodbathspodcast.blogspot.com/ also available at http://www.stitcher.com/podcast/kyle-poling-2/bloodbaths-and-boomsticks?refid=stpr

Plus you can always go to the greatest T-shirt place online or if you are in Texas visit the store of “Fast Custom Shirts” where T-shirt Joe is the only place you should purchase your horror T-shirts: Go to www.fastcustomshirts.com for details.

Grossfest 2 is coming… July 20, 2019, check our Grossfest Facebook page and www.grossfest.comfor details and upcoming guests. #grossfest #grossfest2019

 

Two new episodes of Bloodbaths and Boomsticks

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This week Tim, Kyle, and John recount all the weeks’ viewings and check into 3 flicks to review.  First being Tommy Lee Jones goes full homeland terrorist in THE PARK IS MINE,  Then we get into Robert Ginty straight outta dental surgery and fighting against the powers of the mighty Donald Pleasence in WARRIOR OF THE LOST WORLD.  Then Barbara Stanwick moves into a crazy house in an ABC movie of the week jam called THE HOUSE THAT WOULD NOT DIE.  Also we talk the ins and outs of movie piracy, Living in Amish country, and CHUDS!!!!!

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This time around we talk about 3 more flicks.  The first being picked by Tim and is a movie that stars anyone who has ever been in a horror movie ever…LITERALLY in DEATH HOUSE,  Then another great ABC movie of the week flick in A COLD NIGHTS DEATH (Spoiler Alert} It has monkeys!!!  Then Art kills snooty folks in the newest Netflix jam VELVET BUZZSAW.  Also we talk about the newest and saddest horror gimmick to try to separate you from your money Fanmio.com We answer your questions,  and rundown all of this week’s flicks worth talking about. 

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Gross Movie Reviews #459

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Gross Movie Reviews #459

 

Superstition (DVD) – In 1692, a witch is burned at the stake but before she dies she of course curses all involved and their families. Now in 1982, a family looking for a fresh start moves into a long empty house that has some history of people dying over the years. Never mind an old retired priest allows them to move in knowing the possibility of death and that the swimming pond out back was placed there to keep the evil witch at bay. Which by the way the pond doesn’t work that well. The neighbor warns them of the strange stuff and the weirdo son of course is the suspect the police are looking for. But who cares a crazy buzz saw flies into the chest of another priest who hoped the curse was gone! If you were a person that frequent the video stores in the 80s good chance you seen the VHS box at one point. The film not great but not horrible either as it is a reminder of movies you never heard of and would take a chance on renting them in the 80s. I give it 2 ½ stars.

 

Superstition 2 (YouTube) – The Italian sequel was released in 1989 and was mostly known under the title “Witch Story”. It has very little to do with the first film other than a witch cursing everyone and a cross that can fend the witch off. A brother and sister take their college friends to an abandoned home they inherited and has some bad history. Even though this film involves a witch it has more of a demon flick tone as demons possess some of the young people and turn them on each other. If there is one reason to watch this it is for the bad ass scene involving a dude in a pond about to get a chainsaw to the skull from his possessed girlfriend! I give the sequel 2 stars but in the end don’t make a whole of sense.

 

Lady Avenger (VHS) – David DeCoteau directs, Michelle Bauer shows up topless at least three times, and William Butler plays the boyfriend of Maggie our “Lady Avenger”. The woman that plays Maggie also goes on about a year or so later to be in Playboy. Anyway Maggie has just got out of the big house to go to her brother’s funeral. Pissed off and wanting answers she breaks away from her protective custody to get to the boatyard to ask questions. After kicking three dudes ass and gets away from them in a fiery car chase she bangs her boyfriend and gets back on the case. As she begins to piece things together of all involved she realizes the people she wants revenge against are much closer to her than she thinks. This of course ups the level of wanting revenge where she goes all Robert “The Exterminator” Ginty with a flamethrower. A fun C-grade action flick that was a direct-to-video back in 1988 as I give this flick 2 ½ stars.

 

A Bay of Blood (DVD) – A 1971 Mario Bava film that has many death scenes stolen by the “Friday the 13th” films whether horror fans admit it or not.  Because of an older woman unwilling to sell her beautiful land and we get some fast and furious murders. The movie begins with two murders. One is the older woman who is made to look like a suicide. Then who killed her is then killed by an unknown person and his body is made to disappear so no one can find it. A wonderful film of double crosses with an excellent ending. For one reason or another Bava has never been in my wheelhouse so I am not a fan nor a hater but willing to check out his films when I come across them. I give it 2 ½ stars.

Death Kiss (On Demand) – So are you a fan of Chuck Bronson and the “Death Wish” films then you will enjoy bootleg Bronson in this low budget homage to those films. We meet a DJ played by Daniel Baldwin who just rages against the city police for not doing their job. That maybe a vigilante is needed? In comes bootleg Chuck Bronson who doesn’t use many words but has many uses for hand guns to bring down criminals. He steals the money from the criminals he brings down and hands it off to a single mother of a little girl in a wheelchair. Thinking she is charity and needs to pay bootleg Chuck backed she tries her best to find out more about him. But bootleg Bronson has his reasons and keeps them at arm’s length. The movie is absolutely a lot of nostalgia and fun. The movie isn’t perfect but a wonderful gift for us Bronson fans to fill the void as I give this flick 3 stars.

 

The Horseman (On Demand) – A hidden low budget gem from Australia about a 44-year old father who has just lost his daughter under suspicious circumstances. The father is sent a porn video that stars his daughter who was used by four men and was under the influence of heavy drugs. After seeing this it sends the man into a primal rage to seek out all involved, torture them horribly, and end their lives for what they did to his daughter. As he travels on the highway on his quest he picks up a hitchhiking teenager named Alice. Alice and the man become friends on the road but she knows nothing of his quest for revenge. The story is gritty, screwed up, and this dude has a thing about fucking up people’s dicks! This is literally one bad ass air pump to the penis as I give it 3 ½ stars and yes the father uses a tire pump!

 

Halloween: The Panhandle Massacre (YouTube) – A not-for-profit fan film written and directed by Dean Thomas stars David Dietz as Dr. Loomis’ grandson who oversees Michael Myers. Myers has broken out again and is loose near the Panhandle Trail in Pittsburgh back on his murder spree. Authorities have no clue what to do but Dr. Loomis is there to help guide detectives in the capture or killing of Myers to stop the unstoppable killer again. Well-acted and well produced music for the fan made film makes it one of the better “Halloween” fan made features I have seen over the years as I give it 2 ½ out of 4 stars.

Babes in Psycho Land (DVD) – Two of my favorite filmmakers are back as the feature is directed by the intelligent David Silvio and produced and written by his equally talented wife Diana Silvio. The film is a simple story about Mary trying to reopen her home for foster kids and Andy trying to deal with his bizarre issues. Apparently some time ago Andy’s twin Alex and a girl named Jenny that Andy had a crush on were killed. So anytime Andy comes in contact with a female like Officer Piper Paisley, he believes it is Jenny and swears he won’t hurt her. But it always ends horribly wrong and as Officer Paisley gets pulled into this bizarre world of Mary, Andy, and the foster home she begins to enjoy it too much. Andy finding females again Mary, head of the house is not at all happy but Mary has her own bizarre issues as she is told she may not reopen. The movie rides the edge of sanity really well as it brings you into a bizarre world of you are not sure who the actual victim is and gives you that wonderful uneasy feeling in the pit of your stomach. Kiss of Death Productions once again makes a film that cannot be classified but is must-see independent film that is a cut above most. The whole cast plays their roles perfectly including those of Jack and Cassandra at the end of the film. The Silvios don’t make films for everyone but they do make films for people who are looking for something different and interesting every time out. I give this cringe-worthy movie 3 ½ out 4 stars.

 

Warrior of the Lost World (VHS) – Robert Ginty is a man who rides his super cycle through the Wasteland that might be the only hope for what’s left of mankind. As he rides he is chased by a brutal police force of the ‘Omega’ where he is forced to drive into a wall of rock. Lucky for ‘the rider’ aka Robert Ginty he is pure or at least according to Fred Williamson and ‘the elders’. He has been chosen to help infiltrate the ‘omega’ and help a man escape who is being tortured by the leader Donald freakin Pleasence! Sounds fun, has a great cast, a talking motorcycle, but somehow doesn’t translate into cinema gold? David Worth who is also known for giving us “Shark Attack 2 & 3”, “Kickboxer”, and “Hazard Jack” didn’t seem to have much to work with in Italy but did his best. I give this flick 2 stars as the cast outshines the hokey film.

 

The Park is Mine (YouTube) – Totally forgot how good this film is starring Tommy Lee Jones as a Vietnam vet Mitch who has lost a friend recently. The friend’s dying wish is for Mitch to use his plan to take over Central Park for a few days till Veteran’s Day. His hope is people will take notice and appreciate what these vets did and stop being mistreated. So Mitch goes ahead with the plan unsure if it would work but it does. He asks the commissioner to give him 72 hours to keep the park empty. That is all well and good until the deputy mayor gets involved and things begin to get messy. All the deputy mayor wants is Mitch to die and go away especially when he sends in two mercs to take him down. But meanwhile a reporter with a camera gets in the park and gets to videotape what Mitch is trying to do. I give this film 3 ½ stars and its message of how Vietnam vets were forgotten and mistreated is still relevant today.

 

The House That Would Not Die (DVD/YouTube) – A 1970 TV movie where Ruth and Sara inherit a home that was built in the late 1700s. Apparently Ruth’s cousin took a liking to Ruth when she was young and left the house to her. But the old Campbell house has a haunting history and strange things begin to happen to Sara after a fun séance is done and a spirit enters Sara. The problem is restless spirits live beyond a fake wall in the basement that seeks answers for their peaceful death slumber. A very PG-rated paranormal film is the best thing I can say about the old TV movie as I give it 1 ½ stars.

 

Any comments or questions please send to grossmoviereview@verizon.netor www.facebook.com/grossmoviereviews . Remember folks always support your local independent movie theater, independent video store, and independent filmmakers! It will keep horror alive………

Don’t forget you can also hear Kyle Poling and me talking about horror flicks on a weekly basis on the Bloodbaths and Boomsticks podcast at: www.bloodbathspodcast.blogspot.com/ also available at http://www.stitcher.com/podcast/kyle-poling-2/bloodbaths-and-boomsticks?refid=stpr

Plus you can always go to the greatest T-shirt place online or if you are in Texas visit the store of “Fast Custom Shirts” where T-shirt Joe is the only place you should purchase your horror T-shirts: Go to www.fastcustomshirts.com for details.

Grossfest 2 is coming… July 20, 2019, check our Grossfest Facebook page and www.grossfest.comfor details and upcoming guests. #grossfest #grossfest2019

Gross Movie Reviews #426

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Gross Movie Reviews #426

 

Mayhem (DVD) – Imagine if “The Belko Experiment” was done better with a simpler plot to it. The new virus that is affecting people around the globe is the ‘red eye virus’. This virus doesn’t kill you as it attacks your brain and makes you just not care. Some people it affects them sexually, some people it gives them angry rage, and so on. The point is this law firm with the help many people that work long and hard for the company found a way to get a man off for murder who killed a co-worker during the time he was infected with the virus. The CDC is aware of it and constantly trying to find a cure for it. But someone has put the virus into the water supply of the law firm and now it is on lockdown. Not before the dude that found the loop hole is fired and a woman his company is screwing over is supposed to be thrown out. Because of the lockdown the two decide to make a pact to make their way to the top in a gruesome, murderous, sexually charged rampage to kill the president of the company because they wouldn’t be blamed. Great concept for a film, gory as fuck, and absolutely entertaining as hell as I give it 4 stars.

 

The Mummy (DVD) – So if you get through the first 15 minutes of the film of Tom Cruise being Tom Cruise and check your brain at the door you will enjoy this flick for what it is? Now I was expecting a giant turd but it never happened. It is a cheesy, wonderful throwback idea of how to start the “Dark Universe” saga. Tom Cruise is a guy who uses the military to dig up artifacts and sell them on the black market until the 30 something cute professor gets involved and both unleash something evil that the world thousands of years ago buried. The Mummy or princess turned to the blackest of magic when her father had a son to make a pact. Now alive in present day she wants to complete the pact to bring evil upon the world and her to reign as king or queen in this case. But with the introduction of Dr. Jekyll as the Nick Fury character he has other plans. The movie is interesting enough to take a chance on and it is shameful that Universal Studios gave up so easy on this “Dark Universe” concept. Me personally I want it to happen, don’t give two shits whether Tom Cruise is involved or not as I give this flick 2 ½ stars.

 

Double Target (DVD) – Oh Bruno Mattei aka Vincent Dawn I so wanted to love your bootleg ‘Rambo 2’ 1987 flick that stars Miles o’ Keefe as bootleg Lorenzo Lamas or Bob in this case. But it gets boring pretty quick. Donald Pleasance plays a senator who wants a covert operation into Vietnam that makes sure the Vietnam and Russia aren’t planning some kind of terror attack. Bob just wants to go in rescue his son. Once you understand Mr. Pleasance was there for maybe a day of filming you lose interest in this action war flick that is a little too light on the action as I give it 1 star.

 

Jigsaw (DVD) – It has been a decade since the last Jigsaw murders and the death of Jigsaw aka Tobin Bell’s character. But a recent police chase of a two bit drug dealer to a roof reopens an investigation into the murders as apparently Jigsaw is back or so it seems? A police detective wrapped up in the investigation thinks he has the suspect knowing Jigsaw is dead but Jigsaw is always one step ahead in this prequel, sequel as usual they are still making shit up as they go! It wasn’t terrible but I think I am hung up on the fact I liked what they were starting in the last film with the victims of Jigsaw having their ‘AA’ meetings. It felt like it was setting up a slew of other Jigsaw flicks that were going to go in a different direction? I give this flick 2 stars.

 

Zombies: The Beginning (DVD) – One of the last films for Bruno Mattei aka Vincent Dawn goes back to the reimaging cookie jar one more time as he remakes “Aliens” sort of with zombies soap opera style. Armed forces are sent to an island where a zombie outbreak has been reported. Tyler Inc., has been experimenting with humans and now the island has become overrun with the undead. The Special Forces go in in hopes of rescuing the scientists but instead have to fight off hordes of flesh eaters. Not his best work in the zombie genre but you know I had to watch it as I give it 1 ½ stars.

 

Island of the Living Dead (DVD) – Vincent Dawn had one last zombie film in him before he left this great earth and horror fans. This film centers around Treasure Hunters who get stranded on an island that has the undead and a crap load of gold. About 500 years ago the Spaniards were happy and rich until a plague hit turning them all into zombies and they are controlled by a being who wants them to obey and worship it. Meanwhile the treasure hunters are risking life and limb trying to figure out how they can get the gold off the island. If there was a rave it could have been called “House of the Dead”? I give it 1 star.

 

Yellow Fangs (DVD/YouTube) – A 1990 movie directed by Sonny Chiba based on true events that happen in the mountains of Japan in the winter of 1915. A ridiculous huge bear went from village to village attacking women and dragging them deep into the snowy mountains. So of course a hunting party gets together trying to track down this murderous beast. Great killer bear flick worth tracking down that is also known as “Remains” or I like to call the film “Grizzly 3”. I give this wonderful killer bear film 3 stars.

 

Another Kind (DVD) – A few young people get together to on a trip to the mountains mid-winter to enjoy something different? After the one dude’s stuck up girlfriend leaves and the threesome see some lights at night that wake them strange things begin to happen. As they try to decide whether to hike back or press on they get lost and weird things keep happening. Think “Blair Witch” in the winter with aliens. I give this bare bones film 1 ½ stars.

 

Blade Runner 2049 (DVD) – The sequel picks up 30 years later after the first film’s events where the Tyrell Corp., bankrupt and was bought out by the Wallace Corp. They continue to make replicants but have learned from their mistakes and still hope for them to take over the human population. A Blade Runner comes across a typical non-violent replicant that as long lived longer than he should but something is different and this Blade Runner has found evidence of something that is linked to the legendary Officer Deckard. Deckard mysteriously disappeared 30 years ago and leads this new Blade Runner down a worm hole of something that could change the world or possibly put it into complete chaos! Again visually beautiful like the first film but can be a little boring but for me this film came about 20 years to late as I give it 2 stars.

Skip Trace (Blu-ray) – Jackie Chan is Bennie a lifelong cop for the Hong Kong police who has no family except a girl who is the daughter of his former partner that he swore he would watch over. Johnny Knoxville is a lifetime hustler/gambler/con man who gets mixed up with the Chinese mob when he sees a murder and has “the Matador’s” phone. On top of that the Russian mob is looking for him as he knocked up the main man’s only daughter. It is up to Bennie to get Connor Watts back from Russia over the China border to testify and put this notorious mob to rest. Jackie is getting a little older but that doesn’t stop him from doing a crapload of entertaining stunts and Knoxville being the perfect sidekick for Jackie. I really would like to see a few more movies with these two together as I believe they have some untapped chemistry? I give this entertaining as usual Jackie Chan film 3 stars.

 

Any comments or questions please send to grossmoviereview@verizon.netor www.facebook.com/grossmoviereviews . Remember folks always support your local independent movie theater, independent video store, and independent filmmakers! It will keep horror alive………

Don’t forget you can also hear Kyle Poling and me talking about horror flicks on a weekly basis on the Bloodbaths and Boomsticks podcast at: www.bloodbathspodcast.blogspot.com/ also available at http://www.stitcher.com/podcast/kyle-poling-2/bloodbaths-and-boomsticks?refid=stpr

Plus you can always go to the greatest T-shirt place online or if you are in Texas visit the store of “Fast Custom Shirts” where T-shirt Joe is the only place you should purchase your horror T-shirts: Go to www.fastcustomshirts.com for details.

Independent horror fans it is coming… GROSSFEST! July 28, 2018! Go check out www.grossfest.com for all the details! 

 

We tackle two flicks on opposite ends of the cinema spectrum this week.

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This week Kyle and Tim return from another fantastic trip to the greatest convention in the solar system, CINEMA WASTELAND!  We recap all the goings on, answer your questions, recap what we have been watching, and cover RAZOR DAYS from Mike Watt and happy cloud pictures and a groovy 60’s flick starring Donald Pleasance A.K.A. the fantastical tiny P. in FANTASTIC VOYAGE.  Check out all the shit and shenanigans right here.

 

http://www.bloodbathspodcast.blogspot.com/

episode 160