Gross Movie Reviews #404

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Gross Movie Reviews #404

 

Primal Force (DVD/YouTube) – A 1999 TV “UPN” premiere film that pits Ron Perlman versus genetically-engineered monkeys! Mr. Perlman plays a character named Brodie who had a run in with these mutations on an island outside of Mexico. Ten years ago, Brodie and some others were brought in to be guides to the rich who wanted to hunt big game, but not just any big game. Some crazy ass scientist is playing god and has someone funding him to give them bad ass animals for the hunt and the island. A few rich people get killed during the hunts and the monkeys who were experimental were supposed to die but instead became the hunters as they grew smarter and took over the island. Brodie barely escaped but is still haunted by the nightmares of the event. But Brodie must go back as he is approached to be a guide for a rescue team as a plane has crashed in the middle of this uninhabited island. From there it becomes Ron Perlman versus bad ass monkeys and it is fucking glorious stuff! Don’t walk but run to see this rather unknown gem as I give it 3 ½ stars. This film is further proof that I believe people are sucking movie ideas from my head while I sleep???

 

Deep Space (VHS/YouTube) – Horror fans this isn’t that that weird sci-fi flick that stars Charles Napier that took forever to show up on any format outside of VHS in 1989/1990… This is that Marc Singer sci-fi feature where he plays Commander Krieger and receives a distress call from some scientists. Yes folks, this is the reason I exist so I can watch it so you don’t have too! But moving on when Krieger and his cheap ass robot show up to rescue the scientists not all feel it’s an emergency? They just happen to be messing with a mutated virus which has mutated again into a cheap looking but effective alien creature that wants to fuck up humans. What is interesting about the creature is it’s made up of every disease known to man so all it has to do is touch you to kill you. That’s some fucked up cool shit for a B-movie. I give it 2 ½ stars.

 

Blue Monkey (VHS/YouTube) – John Vernon just happens to run a hospital that just so happens to be testing a laser thingy? Well of course some old dude gets pricked by a foreign plant at his woman’s greenhouse that basically gives him a heart attack and a weird bacterial infection. The infection eventually sends the hospital into lockdown which randomly has Joe Flaherty from SCTV and his pregnant movie wife at the hospital trying to give birth. It has nothing to do with the story but come on we all love Joe! Meanwhile Steve Railsback and a doctor are trying to track down the infection that has mutated into a creature with a Nintendo gun… That is before the government just runs and burns the place to the ground because they consider it a “Class 4 Quarantine”. The 1987 film was also known as ‘The Insect’ but let’s be honest I don’t think many horror fans knew or cared about this lackluster horror film as I give it 1 ½ stars.

Hectic Knife (DVD) – Let’s be honest folks most of us are Troma fans and we know Troma pretty much has become a distributor of independent films. Hey Troma has to survive just like any other small movie company. 99% of the time the newer Troma stuff that is released is to make them money and keep them afloat and really doesn’t have anything to do with the Troma legacy? Well folks, I am to say ‘Hectic Knife’ is a different but Troma-like film that has come out of nowhere. The film is about a new knife-swinging superhero named ‘Hectic Knife’. He kills rapists, gangsters, junkies, but like the rest of us normal people he has to pay bills, needs a roommate, struggles with all the killing, and no girlfriend. But when ‘Hectic Knife’ comes into contact with a professional baddie named ‘The Piggly Doctor’ he must risk his own life to defeat this new baddie. Hilarious over-the-top violence, bad jokes, bagels, a hippie, and the vibe the film gives off while watching it is like the stuff of second generation Troma films. Let me explain: first generation is “Toxic Avenger and Class of Nuke ‘em High”, second generation is “Tromeo and Juliet and Sgt. Kabukiman”. It fits in with the 90s Troma stuff which is a good thing. The movie just has that Troma vibe that makes you wonder if Lloyd may have been on set. Troma should be more than happy adding this feature to this their library it’s one of the few flicks that understand what Troma is all about and for that I am thankful! I give this fun flick 3 ½ out of 4 stars and definitely one of the better films of 2017! Go get it now folks www.troma.com as there isn’t enough good things I can say about this independent flick.

 

Angel Heart (DVD) – Robert DeNiro is the devil and Lisa Bonet gets banged to death so bad the “Cosby Show” shunned her and her movie career. This weird voodoo/film noir flick gets 2 stars. The film keeps you interested until it ends and leaves questioning why?

 

Jocks (DVD) – Completely forgetting this Donald Gibb flick exists, shame on me. Decided to wander down “Tim Gross USA Up All Night” memory lane and rewatch this hilarious stupid sex comedy that sat on the shelf for over a year before its release. Richard Roundtree is the coach of a tennis team that is a bit unorthodox but wins a lot of matches and they are in Vegas for the championships. Boobs, booze, and Donald Gibb nailing a dude in the balls with a tennis ball to win the match are the highlights of this fun late night memory. And want a fun one it is as I give it 3 stars.

 

What’s wrong with Mom? (DVD) – Leave it to independent filmmaker Jim Roberts to make a short film about his mother being sick. When he gets a call from his brother Eric to go visit mom, he is expecting her to have the flu not have a hunger for flesh. Gory, fun, and to the point is what makes Jim Roberts one of the best and one of my favorite filmmakers out there in independent film land as I give it 3 ½ out of 4 stars.

 

Convoy (DVD) – A late 70s film that became an early HBO 80s regular run feature is about a misunderstanding between truckers and a cop who goes over the line to bring the law down on them. When the truckers refuse to obey we got a “CONVOY” through the state of Arizona that eventually has the Rubberduck getting shot to pieces near the end of the flick. Too this day not totally sure what is the plot of the film exactly but what do want for a film that is based on a country song written in 1975 when CBs were a big thing? If you are over 35 you are old and most likely remember this nonsense that stars Kris Kristofferson, Burt Young, and Ernest Borgnine! The back story of the film sounds a hell a lot more interesting and worth taking a trip on the google machine to find out more as I give it 2 ½ stars. It’s no ‘Smokey and the Bandit’.

 

Any comments or questions please send to grossmoviereview@verizon.net or www.facebook.com/grossmoviereviews . Remember folks always support your local independent movie theater, independent video store, and independent filmmakers! It will keep horror alive………

You can always visit and see some past reviews, independent film news, or me ranting at: www.grossmoviereviews.com !!!

Don’t forget you can also hear Kyle Poling and me talking about horror flicks on a weekly basis on the Bloodbaths and Boomsticks podcast at: www.bloodbathspodcast.blogspot.com/ also available at http://www.stitcher.com/podcast/kyle-poling-2/bloodbaths-and-boomsticks?refid=stpr

Plus you can always go to the greatest T-shirt place online or if you are in Texas visit the store of “Fast Custom Shirts” where T-shirt Joe is the only place you should purchase your horror T-shirts: Go to www.fastcustomshirts.com for details.

Also you can pick up my new book “Gross Movie Reviews: More Sequels, More Massacres, More Beer” at: http://www.lulu.com/shop/tim-gross/gross-movie-reviews-more-massacres-more-sequels-and-more-beer/paperback/product-22853681.html

 

Louisiana-Set Paranormal Mystery ‘Bayou Ghost Story’ Debuts 4/18 on Amazon Prime, and Vimeo On Demand.

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NEW ORLEANS, LA April 16th – Together Magic Films has announced the April 18th release of their new supernatural feature film Bayou Ghost Story across digital platforms.

 

The official synopsis reads: “A paranormal investigator travels to the South to research a series of deaths connected to a supernatural curse haunting an old Louisiana family.”

 

Written and directed by Armand Petri; Bayou Ghost Story will be available to Amazon Prime subscribers in the US, UK, DE & JP beginning April 18th.

 

“Bayou Ghost Story is a thrilling paranormal whodunnit set in the backdrop of Louisiana’s tradition of ghost stories, urban legends and haunted locations. It’s a story of family and outsiderism.” – Says Petri, noting that the new film will also be available for rent/purchase on Amazon Video and on Vimeo On Demand.

 

Bayou Ghost Story combines elements of traditional cinematography with documentary style. It was shot last year with mostly local talent in the Greater New Orleans area. The film stars Andrew Panzarella, Jared Fleming, Kerry Kelly Gridley, Cheryl Gautier, Hailey Chown, and Armand Petri. Art Arutyunyan produced.

 

Trailer Link

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=6tPaO8I4_pQ&t=7s

 

Purchase Link

https://vimeo.com/ondemand/bayoughoststory

 

IMDB

http://www.imdb.com/title/tt5941004/

John Portanova’s Hunting Grounds coming this May!

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         Bigfoot returns in Hunting Grounds out this May from Uncork’d Entertainment!

 

We’ve just announced the BD and DVD release of Hunting Grounds. 

Hunting Grounds | Official Trailer


https://youtu.be/QqhId9atvjE

Info
Uncork’d Entertainment opens the HUNTING GROUNDS this May.
Winner Best Sci-Fi Horror Film at the Toronto Independent Film Festival 2015, writer-director John Portanova’s acclaimed film sees a fractured family forced to go up against an angry clan of Bigfoot.
Festival audiences and horror critics have gone crazy for the story of a father and son, forced to move to an old cabin in the woods after a devastating tragedy, who unearth a tribe of Sasquatch.
Written and directed by John Portanova and produced by horror label The October People, Hunting Grounds stars Miles Joris-Peyrafitte, Jason Vail, David Saucedo, D’Angelo Midili, and Emmy winner Bill Oberst Jr (Criminal Minds).
DVD and Blu-ray extras include Audio commentary with Writer/Director John Portanova, Producer Matt Medisch, and Director of Photography Jeremy Berg, making-of feature, deleted scenes (Blu-ray only), and  “John Goes Squatchin'” A featurette following Writer/Director John Portanova as he embarks on his first Squatchin’ trip into the Washington rainforest (Blu-ray only).

On DVD and Blu-ray May 2 2017

Holy Terror “The Devil is Real”

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Los Angeles, CAHoly Terror is a film from production house CineRidge Entertainment, the same production company behind Samurai Cop 2 (2015). Holy Terror was developed by writer and director Rich Mallery (Sociopathia, 2015). As well. the film stars: Mel Novak (Game of Death), Vida Ghaffari (“The Mindy Project”), Kristine DeBell, Lisa London, Kelly Reiter and many more! Now, a release date has been announced for the film, including a Video-on-demand launch and World Premiere, in Los Angeles.

The film’s story involves an exorcism gone very wrong. A family have lost their son, but they still want to make contact. Once they bring in the help of a medium, they connect with their deceased son. But, they also make contact with a malicious demon. This demon crosses over and possesses their daughter, leaving everyone vulnerable to further possessions.

Holy Terror is slated for a theatrical launch in Los Angeles. The film will show at the Laemmle NoHo 7, on March 28th, 2017; film reviewers are invited to attend. Following the theatrical release, the film will be available through Amazon Prime, on April 1st, 2017. Horror film fans, in the United States, will be able to see this exciting feature as Holy Terror receives a wide release. The director says of the film and its release: “Holy Terror works on deep psychological levels…and this is a completely different type of film!” And, audiences are encouraged to attend, later this month.

Official synopsis: Believing their deceased son isn’t at peace, Molly and Tom ask a medium to make contact. But after they invite a vengeful demon to cross over, the couple must enlist the help of a disgraced priest to attempt a dangerous exorcism.

The film’s Facebook fan page: https://www.facebook.com/holyterrormovie/

More details on the World Premiere: https://www.facebook.com/events/214844015657938/

 

Gross Movie Reviews #400

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Gross Movie Reviews #400

 

Zombie Croc (DVD) – There has been a disturbance in the small southern town of Raven’s Neck. The deputy Rivera is sent to investigate and all can be found is bloody human remains everywhere. Believed it was an animal attack the sheriff is not all too concerned with Popa Chicken and his hatred for the town’s mayor. Popa Chicken disgusted with the eviction notices so he and his friends can be moved out for big business Popa brings forth a giant croc. While the croc causes havoc in the woods the town’s only hope is the deputy and a guy called “Crocodile Jack”! As usual filmmaker Robert Elkins brings forth a bit of exploitation feel with lots of blood and guts on no budget. I easily could see this film on SyFy Channel or a Chiller Channel during the summer months. My only major complaint would be the running time but was warned by Mr. Elkins ahead of time as I give the monster croc film 2 ½ out of 4 stars. More about the filmmaker and his films can be found here: https://www.facebook.com/robert.elkins.5 .

Zombie Isle (DVD) – Once again Independent filmmaker Robert Elkins keeps the motto: No budget, no problem, as some students and their professor visit an inhabited island for research. The island doesn’t even show up on most local maps. But the students and the pervy professor are in for a surprise when they show up and attacked by flesh-eaters (shades of Fulci perhaps). But the other thing waiting there is an old abandoned army station that the professor knew about and its rumors of a scientist living there? Greeted by scary German scientist guy they become witnesses to a project almost perfected since World War II. Apparently Scary German Guy is working on a formula to perfect soldiers or zombies for war! Think of ‘Outpost’ meets ‘Re-animator’ with a sprinkle of Fulci on no budget as usual as I give the flick 2 ½ out of 4 stars. For more details go check Robert at: https://www.facebook.com/robert.elkins.5 .

 

Arachnicide (DVD) – My hunger for mutant spider movies never ends as I find this oddity low budget flick about the government looking into big time drug dealer project. The project is a secret experiment on genetically-enhanced coco plants that will become full grown within hours to speed up the drug process. A small military tactical team is put together to invade a compound in Albania to destroy the heart of this experiment. Problem is the bad guys are smarter and have no plants there but genetically-enhanced spiders waiting to attack. A ‘Food of the Gods’ thing going here people as I give this oddity 1 ½ stars.

 

Anna (YouTube) – A short film that tackles two subjects in a very unique way. A young woman thought death would solve everything? But being undead and eating yourself sick doesn’t solve anything either… Pretty intelligent stuff from Forte Films Entertainment that is worth your time checking into and following them as I give it the short film 4 out of 4 stars. Find them at: www.fortefilmsentertainment.com and www.facebook.com/ForteFilmsEntertainment .

 

Easter Sunday (DVD) – Douglas Fisher is the serial killer known as “The Bunny Masked Killer” who went on a murderous rampage over 20 years ago on Easter. The police gunned him down but little they know Fisher’s offspring has survived and carries the secret of knowing who his father is. Now present day, the son Ryan Fischer and friends decide to have a drunken campfire and play with the spirit board. Ryan not believing in such a thing screams for his father to be brought back from the dead and contact them. The spirit board of course works and the spirit of Douglas Fisher now possesses Ryan and go dig up the old killer bunny mask. Now Ryan continues his father’s murderous rampage on Easter. I believe it’s a great concept for a slasher film that stars Robert Z’Dar and Ari Lehman. Plus the film has a great death scene by boiling water and has an awesome killer mask to market. But for me the film eventually falls a part in the second half with the film thinking it’s funny and no interesting characters outside of the bunny killer and Ari Lehman as the postman. I am not saying stay away from this holiday flick but I prefer ‘Easter Casket’ from Dustin Mills. You can purchase “Easter Sunday” at www.alternativecinema.com as I give this flick 2 out of 4 stars.

 

Sharkenstein (DVD) – In 1942 Germany, Hitler’s men raid a laboratory to steal Frankenstein’s brain and heart from a scientist for their own evil Nazi experiments. It is said that the heart and brain of the monster cannot be destroyed? Who said this is unknown? But fast forward to present time where vacationers have been disappearing at “Katzman Cove”.  A vacationing family has boat troubles and stumble upon a guy and his horrible German accent that has created ‘Sharkenstein’. A killer shark with the brain and heart of Frankenstein that is an unstoppable force! This horror mash-up is everything and more you expect from Polonia Brothers Entertainment. The only thing missing is Jon McBride randomly showing up as I give this hilarious mash-up 2 stars.

 

Yoga Hosers (DVD) – This latest Kevin Smith film stars Smith’s and Johnny Depp’s kids as “The Colleens” who are clerks at a convenience store in Winnipeg, Canada. The job is tough enough to work on a Friday night but when you are high school sophomores denied a chance to a senior party, it sucks. After learning about Canadian Nazis and fighting with their Phys. Ed. Teacher about real yoga in school they must go to the store. Once there they are greeted by little mini-Hitler sausage people known as the Bratzis. If things could not get worse the senior boy Hunter they adore invites himself and his bro to party at the store to sacrifice the girls to Satan because it is so metal! The boys are killed by the Bratzis and the girls are thrown in jail until they are broken out by Mr. Guy Lapointe to find the secret passage of the Bratzis to fight the evil. This “check your brain at the door” flick is absolutely hilarious and if by some chance you do not like it I say “sorry aboot that”. I give Smith’s latest 3 ½ stars.

 

Logan (Theater) – Damn this movie was really good! We are thrusted into the year 2029 where there is no more mutants (not fully explained but pay attention there are hints), Logan is a drunk and old and old Professor X is a babbling swearing idoit in Mexico. Wolverine just wants to make enough money to buy a boat for Professor X and himself and end it all. Calls it their only safe place left. But one night Logan is approached by a woman who wants to pay him for safe passage to a location in North Dakota for unknown reasons. After a second encounter he is introduced to a little girl named Laura, a mutant. Not wanting anything to do with this Logan takes the money knowing full well people will come looking and wanting to kill him and Professor X. But Laura aka X-23 is what Professor X has been ranting about and believes she is the answer, the hope they look for? Reluctantly as Logan knows he is dying he drives Professor X and the mutant Laura north to get them to Canada. But as Logan learns more about her he begins to feel for her as he knows she will have to face what he has always tried to run from? The film is by far the most violent of any X-men related films or Marvel (exception of Blade). The film is gritty, real, and just a bad ass superhero film that I know I have wanted (because of X-23) but fans of Wolverine for quite a while. This stand-alone movie proves violent comic book movies can be made and make a shitload of cash for the Hollywood execs! I won’t say it is the best flick of 2017 but don’t be surprised it shows up on my list at the end of the year as I give 4 stars.

 

Breeders (DVD) – I believe this hilarious flick where every woman must be naked is from the same guy that gave us ‘Mutant Hunt’, Tim Kincaid. A slimy ass alien roams the streets of Manhattan looking virgin women to rape! If that isn’t enough they eventually become possessed to travel to the alien’s nest under the city. Where of course the women once there are naked and rub each other down with white goo. I swear to you this 1986 film isn’t porn? But wouldn’t have been surprised it wasn’t marketed that way in certain countries. But hopefully a detective and a very concerned doctor can stop the madness or just watch the ridiculousness of it? I give it 2 stars.

 

Kickboxer: Vengeance (DVD) – Haven’t had enough of the first five films? How about a reboot where Jean-Claude Van Damme trains Kurt Sloan to fight Tong Po aka Dave Batista after Tong killed his brother in a special underground tournament. Kurt wants revenge and of course only JCVD and some random hot ass police woman can help you in Thailand. If a fan of the series you know what you are getting yourself into as I give it 2 stars.

 

Mad Foxes (DVD) – So you are looking for lost exploitation flicks? Look no further than this Corman-inspired rampage film where for 75 minutes is a back and forth fight between Kyle Martin and a Nazi motorcycle gang for no really good reason. The film’s highlights many naked women that Kyle has sex with, lots of hairy dongs, bootleg Chuck Norris dojo and friends, Nazi gang shootings, death by gardening shears, multiple penis hackenings, exploding toilet death, a gimp, and a song by Krokus! There is no real point to the film except for having the most over the top rampage thrown in your face! I give it 3 stars, now start looking for this gem.

 

Any comments or questions please send to grossmoviereview@verizon.net or www.facebook.com/grossmoviereviews . Remember folks always support your local independent movie theater, independent video store, and independent filmmakers! It will keep horror alive………

You can always visit and see some past reviews, independent film news, or me ranting at: www.grossmoviereviews.com !!!

Don’t forget you can also hear Kyle Poling and me talking about horror flicks on a weekly basis on the Bloodbaths and Boomsticks podcast at: www.bloodbathspodcast.blogspot.com/

Plus you can always go to the greatest T-shirt place online or if you are in Texas visit the store of “Fast Custom Shirts” where T-shirt Joe is the only place you should purchase your horror T-shirts: Go to www.fastcustomshirts.com for details.

Also you can pick up my new book “Gross Movie Reviews: More Sequels, More Massacres, More Beer” at: http://www.lulu.com/shop/tim-gross/gross-movie-reviews-more-massacres-more-sequels-and-more-beer/paperback/product-22853681.html

 

TERROR FILMS EXPANDS DISTRIBUTION REACH ACROSS 3 ROKU CHANNELS, iTUNES INTERNATIONAL AND VOD PARTNERSHIP WITH I BLEED INDIE

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Los Angeles, CA – Thursday, January 19th, 2017 – In their goal to bring the best indie horror to the widest possible audience, genre distributor Terror Films continues to grow their distribution arm by releasing their films across several new platforms including: 3 Roku channels via a partnership with Roku Developer UDU Digital as well as a newly formed VOD channel from I Bleed Indie and finally, a World Wide expansion on iTunes International with a global reach in over 15 countries. This is in addition to the company’s existing, strategic partnerships with Raven Banner Releasing in Canada and Automatic Entertainment, the distributors official foreign sales division.

The company’s films are expected to launch on http://ibleedindie.com in the next few weeks. The Roku pages are currently live and include Free Flix Tonight, 24 Hour Movie Channel and Free Grindhouse Flix Tonight. Roku customers can find the Terror Films page by searching the links below.

Free Flix Tonight

https://channelstore.roku.com/details/115772/freeflix-tonight

24-Hour Movie Channel

https://channelstore.roku.com/details/86186/24-hour-movie-channel

 

free-flix-tonight-grindhouse-banner_jpeg

Free Grindhouse Flix Tonight

https://channelstore.roku.com/details/119146/free-grindhouse-flix-tonight

Titles will include the entire 2016 slate: Antidote, Hell House LLC, The Dark Stranger, The Chosen, House of Purgatory, The House on Pine Street, Goddess of Love, Patient Seven and Landmine Goes Click with more titles soon to follow.

Terror Films Executive Joe Dain stated, “We are in exciting times in the digital and VOD world of distribution. If handled correctly, we can shine a light on some of the best indie horror films out there that you might not otherwise see from some of our larger distribution counterparts.  We not only give these indie films exposure on a massive level across multiple platforms but by doing so we give them a real chance of being financially successful for everyone involved”.

To learn more about Terror Films or to submit a completed feature film for distribution consideration, visit:

Official Website: www.terrorfilms.net

Official Facebook page: https://www.facebook.com/TerrorFilmsLLC/

 

 

Gross Movie Reviews #391

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Gross Movie Reviews #391

 

The Gate II (VHS) – Very out of print and nowhere near as good as the first movie but follows the Terry character around in this sequel. The sequel was released a few years after the original (1987) but was supposedly filmed in early 1988 and was shelved for unknown reasons? The sequel picks up several months after the ending result of the first film. Terry’s dad is an unemployed airline pilot, his best friend moved because of the demons and all, and Terry still is not well liked in school. So to try and change his luck Terry breaks into his destroyed old friend’s house to call about some demons and such again… This time for good stuff! After some bullies and the hot school girl ruin the ritual Terry gets one of the demon minions and holds him hostage for his wishes to come true. Because of budget constraints??? There is only one demon/minion until the end of this flick. Terry dies saving his dad and hot school girl only to come back to life at his funeral. It’s a fun way to see how the story continues but this could have been a franchise about demons and such and I am still surprised there hasn’t been a remake. If you are a big fan of the first film, the sequel is worth tracking down just because of the Terry character otherwise you are not missing much as I give this 1 ½ stars.

 

The Funhouse Massacre (DVD) – So Robert Englund runs an asylum that is government funded but under the radar of the public in the middle of nowhere land. He has a reporter visiting that wants the low down on why this place exists or why they haven’t killed the insane serial killers they keep? Of course Englund’s character gives her the grand tour and their wonderful backstories. When he drops his guard the bootleg version of Harley Quinn/Batty Boop kills him and releases the inmates. The head of the six insane inmates is played by great bad dude Jere Burns who has a plan of taking over the local funhouse and carnival, locking it, and making it their playground! All who go to the local funhouse are now locked in and become victims of the insane serial killers. Some fun Halloween shit, some cool effects, and we get a great cast Clint Howard and Courtney Gains joining in on the fun. I give the flick 2 ½ stars.

 

Killjoy’s Psycho Circus (El Rey Network/DVD) – Now not all Full Moon stuff is for horror fans or the ‘Killjoy’ films for all horror films to be exact. But this franchise has a weird niche and keeps getting better with every entry especially with Trent Haaga being involved. Haaga may have not directed this entry but still stars as the head honcho himself “Killjoy”! After Killjoy escaped Hell in the last film he has been back on earth for a while. Killjoy has a weekly TV show but it’s in the pooper since Batty Boop left. In a sad attempt of trying to get people to tune back in Killjoy allows a bootleg Batty Boop (Robin Sydney aka Luanne) come on the show and do her thing. Meanwhile, apparently good old Satan is about to be ousted from hell if he doesn’t go after Killjoy and bring him back to hell. So Satan gets a spaceship, a hot girl, convinces Batty Boop (sort of) to go back to Killjoy to set up him for the capture. One problem in all this mess is Killjoy and Batty Boop has been on earth long enough that they are becoming more human and Batty wants a baby? A hilarious and weird film series that I will be always interested in as long as Trent Haaga is and for that I give it 3 stars. Note to you if you watch it: See if you catch the laser blast sounds and music lifted from “Flash Gordon”…

 

Poseidon Rex (DVD) – That dude from ‘Sleepwalkers’ is making a career out of these low budget creature features but anyway he plays a treasure hunter in this flick. Well his dumb ass just happens to blow up the bottom of the ocean (The Blue Hole, too easy to make comments) for some Spanish gold and POOF! There is a swimming T-Rex! And he is eating all the people swimming or boating in the ocean. Like I said, ‘Sleepwalkers’ dude… 1 star.

 

The Night Before Halloween (SyFy Channel/DVD) – Let me just start off saying quite a few people like this flick and me for some reason find it to be a pile dog crap but fuck it you go watch it! The night before Halloween a dark force comes to kill a teenager after a Halloween prank goes bad. Before his death he leaves a message to his friends that just covered up an accidental death/coma of one of their friends. A year passes and still haunted by the events the friends get a weird phone call from the coma patient, meet up, and find out it is some fucked up thing they need to do… Meaning they must scare someone into killing someone else to lift the curse? To me it was a mash up of ‘It Follows’ and ‘I Know What You Did Last Summer’ with less sex and Gordon’s fish stick outfits? I give this SyFy venture 1 ½ stars.

 

Pride and Prejudice and Zombies (DVD) – A zombie film that not only snuck under most people’s radars but was an actual good zombie flick is about zombies in 1700s England! Sometime between 1700 and 1800 London goes all ‘Escape From New York’ and builds a wall around the city after a zombie outbreak happens. London builds an army to fight this menace and keep it in check. As it closes in on 1800 the problem is all but gone but still exists as people like to hide they may have been bitten. Great concept so far, then we have Brother Noopsie aka Charles Dance training his daughters to be not fine women but how to defend themselves against the zombie apocalypse. After attending a dance a few zombies show up only to be a sign of something bigger is coming? End of days… This was an absolute treat to get lost in as I give it 3 ½ stars.

comic-dpn-front

Dreaming Purple Neon (DVD) – Holy Fucking Shit! It’s another balls to walls horror film from Todd mother fucking Sheets! Todd Sheets has almost outlasted everyone in the independent horror scene. While Jon McBride and the Polonia Brothers were getting some mad press in the late 80s and early 90s with their shot-on-VHS classics the highly talented Todd Sheets was perfecting his craft until he blindsided the horror community with his project ‘Zombie Bloodbath’! Since then Todd Sheets has become a household name in the horror community for making some of the craziest ass over the top Indy horror films you could ever witness. And saying that with this latest project from Mr. Sheets he may have topped everything he has done? The film begins with some shady business/gangsters planning something and talking about the purple neon. Next thing we know they shoot a man in the office ask the receptionist to clean it up and she gets scared. So she goes to her best friend at a dentist office with these drugs and two guns. Now understand there fine folks this entire movie (95%) supposedly takes place in and down in the basement of a dentist office… On top of that we have a creepy old dude named Mr. Archer hanging out in the basement with naked people (hot women and non-hard penis hanging around like Christmas decorations) talking about a vessel. Which happens to be some teenager upstairs in the dentist chair that doesn’t know the business/gangster dudes have shown up and shut down the dentist office? Confessing but awesome a ritual takes place, a couple people die horrifically, some torture, a female demon is born, the main gangster dude gets castrated, more blood and guts, more naked people, and if the female demon Abby (I will call her) lives the apocalypse happens! And the purple neon drugs will make sense eventually. But wait there is more… Spoiler alert: no fucking lie, bootleg Gene Simmons shows up and kills a zombie while satanic Jesus is enjoying the falling black rain. Yep, my brain hurts just trying to recall the most unpredictable ending I ever watched and oh yeah I give it 3 ½ out of 4 stars. If there was something that stop me from giving it a perfect and it’s the 111 minute running time but hey I feel like an ass just for nit picking… So horror fans go do yourself a favor and go get this flick from www.zombiebloodbath.com or check out more about it at www.facebook.com/DreamingPurpleNeon .

 

In the Deep (DVD) – A shark flick that stars singer/actress Mandy Moore. Mandy just dumped by her guy is in Mexico with her younger sister trying to enjoy a vacation. On a whim Mandy and her sister go with a couple local guys on boating trip where Matthew Modine is the captain and you get in a shark cage to experience the great whites. Well the women get in, enjoy the sharks, then the cable breaks and they fall to the bottom of the ocean with not much air left. Now do they make it back to the surface or do they die down at the bottom from their air running out. A cool shark thriller well worth the watch as I give it 2 ½ stars.

 

American Mary (DVD) – I was so giddy that I was able to get around and watch this little slick horror flick about Mary, a surgical student who is up to her ears in debt. Nowhere else to turn she goes to a go-go club fully knowing this is not what she wants to do. But someone gets injured, she is offered $5000 cash and no questions asked and next thing you she is a wanted girl in the underground surgical world. Mary goes to a surgical party with her peers and gets drug and raped. She changes her mind and begins to fall into the underground scene of body modification. Fun stuff folks and never hurts to see Katharine Isabelle in another horror flick. I give the film 3 stars.

 

Wedding Slashers (DVD) – Jenna is a girl who had a horrible past that she ran away from. Now, Jenna has friends and her man Alex, just asked to marry her. Problem, her past has caught back up to her and part of her past is her family believes in: Incest is best! Richard Lynch shows up for the last five minutes as Jenna’s father but Jenna and her fiancé must slice and dice their way out of trouble in order to get married. I give it 1 ½ stars.

 

Halloween Spookies (YouTube) – An entertaining family friendly Halloween anthology special from the minds of Dustin Wayde Mills and all around cool horror dude Dave Parker. The fun Halloween film deals with a clown in the house, a guy being informed he’s dead, and if ‘The Gate’ was made by Dustin Wayde Mills. The three stories are surrounded by two evil witches making a brew that they are planning on using a little kid for the extra ingredient. All three stories are PG-fun and bring back memories of ‘Tales from the Darkside’ and ‘Monsters’ TV shows. The project isn’t too scary or bloody and actually a surprise to me how well it came out showing the range of both Mills and Parker. I give the fun Halloween project 3 out of 4 stars.

 

Gravy (DVD) – So the TV show ‘Psych’ is over, that didn’t stop James Roday from getting some of his old friends together to make an outrageous horror film. The outrageous horror film is about three demented people who are cannibals and every Halloween they find a dark bar/restaurant thing and lock it up and have fun with those inside. This year they pick a Mexican place that has a variety of characters where not everything goes to plan as the cannibals learn something about themselves. Once things go sideways the cannibals try to salvage the night and kill whose left. Super bloody, super funny and it stars Paul Rodriguez as the head of the restaurant. I give it 2 ½ stars.

 

Any comments or questions please send to grossmoviereview@verizon.net or www.facebook.com/grossmoviereviews . Remember folks always support your local independent movie theater, independent video store, and independent filmmakers! It will keep horror alive………

You can always visit and see some past reviews, independent film news, or me ranting at: www.grossmoviereviews.com !!!

Don’t forget you can also hear Kyle Poling and me talking about horror flicks on a weekly basis on the Bloodbaths and Boomsticks podcast at: www.bloodbathspodcast.blogspot.com/

Plus you can always go to the greatest T-shirt place online or if you are in Texas visit the store of “Fast Custom Shirts” where T-shirt Joe is the only place you should purchase your horror T-shirts: Go to www.fastcustomshirts.com for details.

Also you can pick up my new book “Gross Movie Reviews: More Sequels, More Massacres, More Beer” at: http://www.lulu.com/shop/tim-gross/gross-movie-reviews-more-massacres-more-sequels-and-more-beer/paperback/product-22853681.html

Dark Blue is an independent production, under the management of the “PERMANENT MEMORIES PRODUCTION”

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dark-blue

Dark Blue is an independent production, under the management of the “PERMANENT MEMORIES PRODUCTION”, directed by Michael Segal.

(http://www.imdb.com/name/nm1444606/?ref_=fn_al_nm_1)

 

The story describes the discovery of ship that sank in the Mediterranean Sea during the 1930’s, which was carrying a precious cargo (the daughters of the Norwegian sea god Aegir)and was heading towards the Vatican City and departed from a Norwegian port in order to avoid the German nazis and the Italian fascists.

 

The vessel had left in secrecy and the legends which were born around the ship called MIORGAROSORMR, never wanted it to exist. The sinister fire that destroyed the norwegian harbor of Trondenheim after its leaving, erased any proof of its existence. What the two scuba-divers didn’t know, is that the ship was protected and guarded by a mythical Celtic creature, that may still be there. The tag line of the movie is: Some things belong to sea and should stay there.

 

The characters in the story are Mike (Michael Segal), fearless and comical in a mean way, Kevin (Roberto D’Antona), the diving centre’s calmest and most cautious staff member, Lisa (Flavia Sabatino), the joyful girlfriend of the partner who hates Mike because he acts as an obstacle between her marriage with Kevin, and an enigmatic sea-man with one eye named Hooper (David White), who seems like he knows more than it looks like, he could almost be the custodian of what the sea hides.

 

In the cast, with smaller roles, there are also Simone Modugno, Camelia Voiasciuc and Samuel Giraffi.

This is the first movie directed by Michael Segal, with the precious help of the awards winner Simone Modugno, documentary director and camera operator on the surface, underwater and drone pilot.

 

Acted out in English, with underwater equipment and filmed on board of a real sunken ship at Isola D’Elba, DARK BLUE challenges destiny, presenting a captivating story and unusual shots for the indie market. The genre is mystery/action and the lead actor Michael Segal (that is a stuntman as well) has been engaged in some dangerous scenes and fights. The movie will be present at the AFM, then at the Toronto Film Market and Berlin.

 

Made with the friendly participation of SML-SUB, IL BLUE DEL MARE, DANIELE RENT and the Diving Centre “IL CARENO”, DARK BLUE will also bring the spectator in the charming landscape of Elba, both outside and under water.

 

Here is the official facebook page:

https://www.facebook.com/darkbluethemovie/

 

Pagina IMDB: http://www.imdb.com/title/tt5502330/?ref_=fn_al_tt_3

 

Teaser Trailer:

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=iLl6Rf5iHMs

 

Official Trailer on Youtube:

https://youtu.be/–Ize2o17Vc

 

Official Trailer on Vimeo:

https://vimeo.com/188797822

 

Playing with Dolls: Bloodlust

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Redding, California – Indie horror director Rene Perez is set to follow-up his 2015 film, Playing with Dolls, with the sequel Playing with Dolls: Bloodlust. Set for a launch this November, Playing with Dolls: Bloodlust focuses on a desperate single mom and the promise of quick cash. The reality is that Stina (Karin Brauns) has been tricked into performing for a reclusive sadist. The film stars: Richard Tyson (Black Hawk Down), Karin Brauns and Colin Bryant. A preview of the film’s Video-on-demand launch is hosted here.

The film has already been launched in foreign territories, including Germany. In North America, the film will be available on iTunes and Amazon, on November 1st. The film will be released in an unrated version, so fans can see the true brutality of this low budget slasher. Available in Ultra HD – 4K, Playing with Dolls: Bloodlust is set to turn home entertainment screens red, with one of this year’s goriest horror releases!

Official synopsis: A group of aspiring actors are chosen for a reality horror TV show. In the show, they must survive being chased by a killer. The program is filmed with scores of tiny cameras, in a cabin and the surrounding forest. What the contestants don’t know is that this murderer is a real killer and the television program is a ruse. Deep in an underground bunker, a psychotic voyeur watches as life and death play out for his amusement. The only prize, here, is survival!

Available here for pre-order, here:

https://itunes.apple.com/us/movie/playing-with-dolls-bloodlust/id1157257868

The film’s trailer: https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=sP2Sl8soxFY

More on the film will be posted at iDiC Entertainment: http://idicentertainment.homestead.com/

 

Knucklebones Available September 13th, 2016

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Knuckle Bones

Knucklebones Available September 13th, 2016

 

When college student Neesa and a group of friends stumble across an ancient dice game their first instinct is to roll them bones. Their second instinct is to run for their lives when the demon they summon starts killing them off one by one.

www.midnightreleasing.com and www.braindamagefilms.com