Just about two months away folks and tickets are available!!!

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Grossfest 2018 we will see yinz there!

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

Dave Stein from the James Balsamo film “The Litch”

 

 

 

 

 

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Gross Movie Reviews #437

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Gross Movie Reviews #437

 

Bomb City (DVD) – A film based on a true story of punks who trying to mind their own business vs. the usual Texas football, so-called Christian family hicks in a town near Armadillo, Texas in 1997. The story revolves around a young man who may look like the typical punk on the outside but was an artist on the inside. He and his friends just didn’t fit in the typical way of life in this Texas town and one night, one thing led to another and a young man died. The kicker is the football that maliciously ran this kid down was a football player and served no jail time. Hell, he went to college! A really interesting true life story on film that needs to be seeked out by you as I give it 3 ½ stars.

 

Razorteeth (DVD) – Imagine the Polonia Brothers in 2004/2005 making a remake of “Piranha” and Jon McBride did the music? You have your movie… A government salvage mission of a sunken sub goes sideways when a package is retrieved from the wreckage but lost in a plane going down over a small town lake. The experimental killer fish comes to life and begins eating all that enter the water. Of course the government investigates to see how much they need to cover up or who to kill off? Kudos to the brothers for saying fuck the budget and still giving us weirdos that like ‘Killer Animal flicks’ a fun no budget film as I give it 2 ½ stars.

 

Video Party Massacre (DVD) – A wonderful treat for fans of “The Video Dead” as this short film from 2014 shows the new generation how much fun the original film was? A man is delivered a T.V. he never ordered. He of course plugs it in to see how it is but it only plays one thing. No matter what channel he turns to it keeps playing the same movie. A black and white film with a man that has a machete and mask on and he is killing people. The man goes to sleep and the T.V. comes to life allowing this masked killer to exist in our realm. Great retro stuff as I give this 3 out of 4 stars.

Porn Shoot Massacre (DVD) – A hilarious take on the slasher genre that is set on one of the biggest porn shoots ever. A big time director is paying out a lot of money to bring in some high end talent for his picture. Problem is none of the talent is gonna leave as they are all being stalked and killed in the roomy set. Once the killing and boobs start it is your normal slasher film with a twist especially when one of the female stars is much smarter than what she is given credit for… Then it’s just a game of survival. A hilarious concept but I personally would have picked a few porn stars that may have pulled this feature off better as I give it 2 stars.

 

B-Documentary 2 (DVD) – Nick Charles is back with a sequel to his great documentary about the independent film world. With introduction done by Lloyd Kaufman of course, Nick and crew worked their asses off to get opinions and conversations from several actors, actresses, and filmmakers. Some are well-known and some are on the rise as they dig deeper in this documentary to help explain things to audiences that may not know what goes on in the independent film business. This time around we get: Gary Sherman, John Bloom aka Joe Bob Briggs, Adam Green, Lynn Lowry, Tiffany Shepis, Kevin Van Hentenryck, Glen Coburn, James Balsamo, Mathew Fisher, Kevin Forte among several others. They were all asked questions such as “How they got started?” “How should future filmmakers get started?” “What is the key to make a successful movie?” You see where this going but the varying opinions is what amazed me because I could argue different points with each of the people interviewed but also agreed with several things that are said on this DVD. Viewers and filmmakers alike this isn’t just a ‘need to watch’ movie… People this is a ‘need to own right now’ documentary that gives you more than just an inside look of independent filmmaker but a peak into the lives of these celebrities you may not have had the pleasure of knowing or hearing of their experiences. I believe Nick and crew got the right mix of talent that is featured in this movie as they are all just different enough to make this work flawlessly. This absolutely perfect film documentary should be used in film school as I give it 4 out of 4 stars.

 

Soultaker (DVD) – A B-movie if there ever was one where Joe Estevez is ‘The Soultaker’ and Robert Z’dar is the ‘Angel of Death’. These two get into an argument when a group of people escape a car accident or so it seems. Once the group gets over the shock of somehow surviving the horrific accident they quickly find out they are not alone. As they are being chased by ‘The Soultaker’ they try to figure out why people can’t see them or hear them as the group tries to get home for the night. A very cheesy but entertaining flick for the B-movie lovers as I give it 2 ½ stars.

Revenge of a Radioactive Reporter (DVD) – The film has a few titles but these were the other two that was mostly used during its 1990 release: Radioactive Reporter and Atomic Reporter. This Canadian film is about a reporter named Mike who is trying to break a story on a local power plant leaking toxic waste. He believes he has the evidence but needs someone from the plant to come out and say something to prove his findings. So when Mike is invited to the power plant the big corporate types have him killed or they think he is dead when Mike is kicked into the toxic waste. His girl Richelle is having a tough time getting over Mike’s death but the corporate big wigs have it out for her to since they are unsure what was said to her about the story? But a new hero of sorts is born or at least just for this movie as a disfigured Mike begins his disgusting gooey crusade to kill all the corporate types at the power plant! Yes it is the Canadian version of “Toxic Avenger” but don’t let that stop you from enjoying all the cool effects and just a fun horror movie about toxic waste. I give this feature 3 stars.

Klown Kamp Massacre (DVD) – May 15, 1991, Edwin the clown went on a murderous rampage at clown camp at Bonzo’s ranch. Many years later and Edwin who was never caught is enraged when the famous clown camp is opened again. Clowns come from all over to learn from the best but are being stalked and killed one by one. Pay attention because on purpose it is “Friday the 13th” with clowns but has a fun twist that makes the film concept fun in the end. This low budget horror film has a little bit of everything: blood and guts, bootleg Crazy Ralph, clown porn, not taking themselves too serious, and a little bit of talent to pull off a must-see massacre movie that I wasn’t expecting to be this damn entertaining! I enjoy finding gems like this as I give it 3 stars.

 

Any comments or questions please send to grossmoviereview@verizon.netor www.facebook.com/grossmoviereviews . Remember folks always support your local independent movie theater, independent video store, and independent filmmakers! It will keep horror alive………

Don’t forget you can also hear Kyle Poling and me talking about horror flicks on a weekly basis on the Bloodbaths and Boomsticks podcast at: www.bloodbathspodcast.blogspot.com/ also available at http://www.stitcher.com/podcast/kyle-poling-2/bloodbaths-and-boomsticks?refid=stpr

 

Plus you can always go to the greatest T-shirt place online or if you are in Texas visit the store of “Fast Custom Shirts” where T-shirt Joe is the only place you should purchase your horror T-shirts: Go to www.fastcustomshirts.com for details.

 

See yinz at GROSSFEST! July 28, 2018! Go check out www.grossfest.com for all the details! 

Yinz need to check out some music from Jon Cross!

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New Album “Former Glory” Now Available

 

New Album “Former Glory” Now Available

I apologize for the inbox intrusion but I just wanted to let you know that my new album “Former Glory“, featuring 16 songs about protest, hopelessness, love, travel, the weather and ice hockey, is now available across the internet.

 

Written, produced and recorded over the last 18 months, this album is different from previous records by Fixtures as many tracks feature stellar performances by Nick Consol on keys, Jonny Cole on horns and keys and Jay Mayo on backing vocals that elevates the song writing to a new and exciting place.

 

Although the band were never all in the room at the same time, their tracks were recorded, emailed to me and then blended together to form the songs and the band you now hear on the album.

Please see below how to listen to the album, purchase it and download it. If you like it, please share it on social and tell your family and friends about it! Enjoy!!

– Jon Cross

 

Former Glory is also available here:
Google Play
iHeartRadio
Deezer
Tidal

Where possible, why not leave us a rating and a review?!

 

 

 

Gray Matter “Earth’s Time is Running Out.”

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West Hollywood, CA (Monday, May 7th, 2018) – Gray Matter is a Matchbox Pictures production. Slated to release throughout May, the film was written and directed by Greg A. Sager. In the film, friendly alien forces crash land, on Earth. They hope to intervene as another alien race wages war against humanity. Gray Matter stars: Alys Crocker (Tormented, 2014), Mike Wilmot (Devil Seed, 2012), Sean Patrick Dolan and many others. A preview of the film’s theatrical and home entertainment release are hosted here.

 

In the story, Grays have been landing on Earth, since the ‘40s. They are here to study us. After a meteorite strike, an extraterrestrial creature emerges, to infest the world. In response, the Grays utilize humans, in order to stop this malevolent presence before it is too late!

 

Gray Matter will see several theatres in Canada. This sci-fi thriller will see at least ten Canadian cities (one night only), on May 8th. After the theatrical release, Gray Matter will show on DVD and Digital platforms this May 15th. Director Sager says of the film: “with​​ Gray ​​Matter​​ we​​ just ​​wanted​​ it​​ to​​ be​​ a ​​fun ​​ride ​​that ​​you ​​could ​​just ​​sit​​ back and ​enjoy…I ​​think ​​we ​​succeeded ​​but ​​we’ll let ​​the audience​ ​decide ​​if ​​we ​​did ​​or ​​not. ​​It’s ​​a ​​sci-fi ​​popcorn ​​movie.” And, this enjoyable thriller will be available throughout the month of May!

A trailer for Gray Matter: https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=e93FtjSEUfU

 

The film’s official synopsis: Since the 1940’s alien beings known as GRAYS have been sighted around the globe with the thought that they visit our planet to study our species and civilization before they eventually invade…but what if we’re wrong? What if they are only here to protect us? After a meteorite crashes to earth awakening the extraterrestrial creature within, a young woman is abducted by an alien GRAY to aide in hunting down and destroying the creature before it can reach a second meteorite that fell to earth decades earlier unleashing its deadly infestation of earth.

Release Date: May 8th, 2018 (Canada, Theatrical) and May 15th, 2018 (Digital, DVD).

Director/writer: Greg A. Sager.

 

Cast:  Sean Patrick Dolan, Alys Crocker, Tara Elizabeth, Drea King, Brenna Llewellyn and Shaun Mazzoca.

More details at Indican: http://www.indicanpictures.com/films/action/gray-matter/

 

The film’s homepage: http://www.graymatterthemovie.com/

 

*available soon at Amazon.

About Indican Pictures: Indican Pictures acquires and distributes feature films to a broad range of entertainment outlets by providing a diverse selection of movies across: theatrical, home video, TV, VOD, PPV and streaming platforms.

Frolic Pictures’ new grindhouse double feature DVDs released with free prizes!

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Blood Freak! Hollywood Man! Fright Night and more! The next wave of Frolic Pictures’ new limited edition grindhouse series double feature DVDs are now available online wherever DVDs are sold (Amazon, Barnes & Noble, Best Buy, etc.) Hand-selected by Hollywood exploitation filmmaker Jared Masters. A sordid combination of old school horror, vintage black comedies and juicy exploitation fare. Each DVD is a one-of-a-kind experience, like going to a drive-in back in the day, except in the comfort of your own home.

Each DVD is approximately three hours of shocking, bizarre, and tantalizing entertainment from a bygone era. Packed with cinematic surprises like short subjects, trailers, vintage TV commercials and intermission cartoons.

Digitally scanned from the original 35mm film prints! Be thrilled and pleasantly surprised with what the Maestro reveals across your screen. Screen at parties, make a double feature night with other cinephile friends, or simply enjoy them alone, as you turn on, tune in and drop out of your semi-important responsibilities.

Just pop the DVD in and let it play, thanks to Frolic’s clever auto-starting video discs. It’s like there’s a projectionist grinding out rare film prints for you at your leisure. Whether you’ve been to a real grindhouse in the 70s or 80s, or you’re discovering the sensation for the first time, these limited edition Frolic Doubles make the perfect show for the avid horror, cult, erotica and exploitation cinema fan.

LATEST FROLIC DOUBLES RELEASED ON DVD:

Carnival of Souls / Spider Baby

Santa Claus Vs. The Devil / A Christmas Without Snow 

Hollywood Man / Maybe I’ll Come Home in the Spring

Fright Night / Karate Kids USA

Attack of The Monsters / Creature of Destruction

Scream Bloody Murder / Track of the Moon Beast

Blood Freak / The Pyx

Get Christie Love / Children of the Night

Joshua / The Swap

All the Kind Strangers / Savage Weekend

The Lazarus Syndrome / Against a Crooked Sky

The Last Woman on Earth / Nightmare Castle

Collect them all! Only from Frolic Pictures! Visit www.frolicpictures.com for more info!

ENTER FROLIC GRINDHOUSE CONTEST for a chance to win a free surprise grab-bag from Frolic Pictures. All you have to do to enter is follow @frolicpicturespresents on Instagram and re-post your favorite photo with hashtag #frolicgrindhousecontest and tag two friends.

5 winners will be announced May 29th, 2018.

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=X0VG2tkZPbE

See yinz Saturday!

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Doing the usual this Saturday, F%4k that Brookline people! Come to Geekadrome for Free Comic Book Day Brookline Blvd. and check out one of the coolest places in the Brookline community. Plus you can meet me Tim Gross!

 

Author, director, actor (this can be debated), podcaster, horror movie critic, I will be there from 10-2 to promote my latest book “Tales from the Gross Side” and celebrate my birthday.

 

That not enough for you. Well I am a fellow nerd that can talk to you about my mounds of horror comics or why “Deadpool” and “Blade” can be considered the greatest comic book movies outside of “Iron Man”? Still not enough, I can talk heroclix and how I could defeat my wife’s three brothers with the craziest team-ups of all time and now it just takes too much thought for today’s heroclix. What, not nerdy enough? Let me just tap one forest manna for my ‘Fog’ so you forget what I just said so we can discuss why old school Magic: The Gathering was better before Series eight???

 

And by some chance that is not enough to come to Geekadrome for a free comic book and visit me? You can come by old people (older than 40) and we can talk about how we all stole baseball cards from Thrift Drugs on Sussex Ave., played at Game Room One, or drank in the woods behind Brookline school or Carmalt school just in case you don’t believe I have lived my whole life in Brookline… See yinz Saturday!

What better way to celebrate Free Comic Book Day than it being my birthday also!!!

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The Geekadrome : Games and Comics

534 Brookline Blvd, Pittsburgh, Pennsylvania 15226

 

 

This Free Comic Book Day will also mark out 11th year in Brookline and we want to celebrate that with a sale to coincide with our Free Comic Book Day.

What’s Free Comic Book Day?
FCBD is a celebration of comics, art, and reading where we purchase a selection of comics to give away for free during the event. as well have special exclusive Funko Pop figures that can only be purchased at the event.

What’s going to be on sale?
All kinds of things are going to be on sale, t-shirts will be $10, we will have a special sale table filled with action figures, collectibles and more all half off or more, and of course comics!

Anything else?
YES! We will be giving away some unique collectible merchandise TBA and each purchase gets you an entry to win one, Winners won’t need to be present but will need to pick them up.

Can I take Free Comics for my friend?
No, But you should tell them about it or even bring them with you. Comics are pop culture and our culture and we love to share it, but we can’t tell if we are sharing it or if someone is just being a little greedy.

 

Gross Movie Reviews #436

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Gross Movie Reviews #436

 

My Friend Dahmer (DVD) – A brilliant look into the younger years of the notorious serial killer we all know is Jeffrey Dahmer. This somewhat documentary portrayal of Dahmer gives the viewer of the film a peak at what Dahmer was like when younger and what may have started his murderous ways. Jeffrey a loner, awkward male teenager who was lost in high school of the 70s struggled like most to make it through bullying, acceptance, being good to the divorcing parents. The film dives into the awkwardness of these times and captures it quite perfectly. The biggest difference is Mr. Dahmer became one of the most notorious serial killers where the rest of us became … ‘blah’. There is several films that tackle the killing and how Dahmer tried to hide the bodies, this film tries to explain what possibly led to these events and why? Was it always fate for him to be a serial killer? Or were there other forces that helped him along? You be the judge when watching this great film. I give it 3 ½ stars.

Sorority Babes in the Dance-A-Thon of Death (VHS/DVD-R) – A Todd Sheets 1991 shot-on-video movie inspired by the greatness “Sorority Babes Slime Bowl-a-Rama” is a warning to not buy crystals in antique shop and not eat applesauce while watching this film. A potential sorority babe goes to the local antique shop and buys a crystal for $10 for the sorority PJ party that night. She thinks they can use it for a séance or something fun? But what she doesn’t know is the crystal ball is a gateway to evil and all her and sorority sisters know is their fate rests in two babbling old antique dealers. When the sisters use the crystal ball for a séance at their party one of the sisters becomes possessed by a demon and begins killing. Hilarious cheesy stuff for the S.O.V. fans as this is a thing of beauty to track for your collection as I give it 2 ½ stars.

 

Hell Asylum (DVD) – An early 2000s low budget flick that has flown under the radar and was released by Full Moon Pictures. The film is written by Trent Haaga, directed by Danny Draven, and stars Brinke Stevens and Joe Estevez. The film revolves around five young models looking for that shot at television or in this case reality TV. They all have agreed to be a part of a TV shows called, “Chill Challenge” where they have to spend a night in a haunted building for a million bucks. Of course the producer has other plans to assure no one makes it through the night. A demon is released into the building while touring the set and begins killing the contestants off one by one. An entertaining horror film that has some gore to my delight and not your typical half-ass paranormal flick. I must give the film 2 ½ stars.

Bong of the Living Dead (Blu-ray) – A group of friends who smoke tons of pot and debate zombie movies on the front porch daily is the main plot of this flick. Their lifelong dream of a zombie apocalypse happens in front of them and it doesn’t go exactly as planned. If anything it is lame for the group of friends. They spend days in the house not in danger and of course smoking lots of weed. But after a couple close calls of a zombie attack and the weed supply running low the group has decided it may be time to have an actual plan to do something before they are all zombies! Max Groah and crew did a wonderful job of crafting an excellent zombie/comedy with great dialogue, cool characters you care about, and some excellent effects. It’s hard to believe this was an Indy project as it is proof of when everything is done with love of the genre.  As hilarious as the film is it does take a serious tone close to the end of the film which caught me off guard. But from beginning to end this film does not disappoint Indy fans as this may be this year’s “Attack of the Killer Donuts” as I give it 3 ½ out of 4 stars. For more details about the film: www.bongofthelivingdead.com and www.facebook.com/botldmovie .

 

Night Feeder (DVD) – A shot-on-video flick from 1988 that has just been resurrected from ‘the dead format zone’ has people of San Francisco being murdered with the authorities at a loss of who is doing it. A reporter has just moved in the ‘killing ground’ recently and takes upon herself to start investigating. This could be her big break for her magazine that she writes for as she has found out all the victims have the same trait. Their brains were sucked out through their eye socket. Plus all the murders seem to have some kind of connection to this local favorite punk band. Great B-movie cheese that would have been a lot of fun to see on ‘USA Up-All-Night with Rhonda Shear”. I give it 2 stars.

 

Sideshow (DVD) – A fun horror film about a circus sideshow with an all-star cast. This early 2000 film centers on ‘Dr. Graves Sideshow and Horrors of Nature Show’. A group of kids decide to visit the Dr. Graves show on its last night only to stir up a little trouble with Dr. Graves and his associates. But Dr. Graves being the bigger man invites them to a special ‘Horrors of Nature Show’ where one by one they each become new attractions to the show. Even with calling the police there aren’t anything the kids can do to save themselves. Fun concept that only gets better when you learn the film was directed by Fred Olen Ray, effects by Gabe Bartalos, Brinke Stevens as a fortune teller, and Peter Spellos as a protector of Dr. Graves. The movie seems like a long lost film from the early days of SyFy Channel more than a Full Moon flick as I give it 3 stars.

 

Flight 7500 (DVD) – A weird supernatural horror film that was done in 2014 but only recently released starring Amy Smart and Scout Taylor-Compton. A man dies on an overnight flight to Japan setting forth unnatural events for the other passengers or so it seems. As weird things begin to happen the passengers try to investigate why the man died under the strange circumstance. The movie is kinda boring and kinda predictable as I give it 1 star.

 

Dark Angel: The Ascent (DVD) – Angela Featherstone is Veronica, a demon in hell. Veronica and her dog Hellraiser escape hell to see what man is like? While amazed in the new world she is hit by a car where a doctor hurries her in to his hospital to take care of her. The young doctor named Max finds her a little strange but interesting and asks her to stay at his home. While the young doctor sleeps and works, Veronica learns about human life and how much sinners we all have become. So the demon takes it upon herself to kill sinners and feed their body parts to her dog. This was my first time watching this flick and so glad I did. This Full Moon flick came out during the first phase of Full Moon during the early 90s and not much said about it. This horror movie has it all: love story, great sets of what hell looks like, a cool body part eating dog, and demons that kill sinners. I will be sure to make this Full Moon flick makes it into my regular movie rotation as I give it 3 stars.

 

Cute Little Buggers (DVD) – An UK film with a great horror title about aliens who have traveled the galaxy looking for mates to reproduce. They stop at earth for us ugly things because they believe they can make it work with our ugly ass women? The aliens send out ‘Penetrators’ to investigate and possess bunnies for their cover. The bunnies will attack the women, capture them if possible, and then impregnate them. The movie starts out great and has the right idea but the joke gets grinded into the ground or into stupidity that even the topless women scenes get boring. I like the concept but very poor execution in this case of alien flicks as I give it 1 star.

 

Avengers: Infinity War (Theater) – So it is the comic book movie we all been waiting for as the team faces off with their biggest challenge yet, ‘Thanos’. Spoiler Alert: He kicks everybody’s ass people and the movie is good! Plus, Spidey does his best to try and steal the movie again. Saying that, bottom line Marvel does not disappoint with all the build up to Thanos and shows why DC still has trouble making films. Grab the popcorn and enjoy it for it is movie fans as I give it 3 ½ stars.

 

Tremors: A Cold Day in Hell (On Demand) – Burt and Travis travel to Canada above the Arctic Circle for possible graboid sightings and attacks. They meet a research team with a person who has experience as her father is ‘Val’. But why would the underground monsters and the Ass-blasters be in the Artic? Well, with the recent climate change aka global warming the permafrost melting has allowed for the graboids to move around in the cold soil. And the monsters are hungry! But Burt has other plans for the man-eating bastards but with his current medical condition the torch has been passed to Travis to come up with a plan. And the plan includes capturing a live graboid in order to get to its gland to save Burt’s life. Once again “Tremors” doesn’t disappoint, is entertaining, and does not get old with every story told. Thank you Michael Gross keeping Burt Gummer alive as I give the giant worm film 3 stars.

 

Split (DVD) – An absolutely creepy and interesting flick about young Professor X who has 23 personalities because of abuse early in life. Two of his personalities have taken over and have snatched up three teenage girls so they can bare witness to the legendary 24th personality. I hate always seeing movies describe as “thrill-rides” when they mostly suck but this flick actually is a creepy thrill-ride! There is so much to this film to like and how it can appeal to all viewers. Amazing stuff as young Professor X does amazing job of going from one person in his head to the other while talking to his captives. This is the different horror movie to show your friends as I give it 3 ½ stars.

 

Any comments or questions please send to grossmoviereview@verizon.netor www.facebook.com/grossmoviereviews . Remember folks always support your local independent movie theater, independent video store, and independent filmmakers! It will keep horror alive………

Don’t forget you can also hear Kyle Poling and me talking about horror flicks on a weekly basis on the Bloodbaths and Boomsticks podcast at: www.bloodbathspodcast.blogspot.com/ also available at http://www.stitcher.com/podcast/kyle-poling-2/bloodbaths-and-boomsticks?refid=stpr

 

Plus you can always go to the greatest T-shirt place online or if you are in Texas visit the store of “Fast Custom Shirts” where T-shirt Joe is the only place you should purchase your horror T-shirts: Go to www.fastcustomshirts.com for details.

 

See yinz at GROSSFEST! July 28, 2018! Go check out www.grossfest.com for all the details! 

You need a copy of Tales from the Gross Side

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http://www.lulu.com/shop/tim-gross/tales-from-the-gross-side/paperback/product-23554233.html

 

The book is a collection of short horror related stories that have been rolling around in my head, unfinished movie scripts, or story ideas. These stories have been something I have wanted to write for quite a while. I now thought it was the right time for people to get a look inside my mind.

Gross Movie Reviews #435

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Gross Movie Reviews #435

 

Deep Blue Sea 2 (On Demand/DVD) – So this was a glorious waste of a sequel. Some rich dude basically buys the same set from the first film and sets up sharks to experiment on. He of course brings in the smartest people from around the world to work on his project that could possibly unlock the human brain or extend life… Or just make bull sharks smarter and wanna fuck up humans for fun! Eventually after they breed they become “piranha-sharks” that SyFy Channel has made better with less. This was a sad excuse for a sequel and should be avoided as it is the worst movie so far for me in 2018 as I give it 0 stars.

The Night Watchmen (DVD) – So Blimpo the Clown, a Baltimore native, has died in Romania while on tour. His body is shipped to the Baltimore Gazette instead of the morgue down the street. The night watchmen are made a deal by the two guys who made the mistake to keep it overnight. We are introduced to two crazy watchmen who for the most part just watch porn and play cards, while a third that might be witness protection reads a lot, and the new guy who is done with the band thing. Everything that happens at the gazette is known by these guys: missing lunches, cute girls on which floor, when the boss (James Remar) is feeling up young ladies’ butts. Well their boss gets curious about Blimpo’s coffin to see if he can steal anything but instead finds Blimpo the Vampire! Blimpo and his fellow going army of vampires have taken over the building and Karen the cute journalist is in trouble. So the night watchmen and the rookie come up with a plan to save her and possibly ask her on a date while fighting vampires. We get a hilarious, awesome glorious bloody mess of a horror film that will be on my ‘Best of 2018’ list. I give this movie 4 stars folks.

 

AZF (Anti-Zombie Force) (DVD) – A zombie outbreak has ravaged the world and the military is growing thin trying to save folks. But there is new hope as news comes across a radio transmission of a cure called “Code Lazarus”. Along with hope of course come people who want the cure to just rule the world instead of restoring it? The movie centers on these two military groups racing to get control of the cure. The props, military truck, guns make this independent zombie film an interesting watch. The story isn’t exactly something that is unique but having the resources on a small budget to pull off what most have trouble doing is gratifying enough for me to enjoy what this filmmaker and company pulled off. For that I have to give this feature some respect and 2 ½ out of 4 stars. More about the film can be found at www.witchdoctorfilms.com .

Housesitters (Vimeo/DVD) – An independent horror/comedy that has young two girls: Angie and Izzy getting the perfect job of housesitting for a guy that Angie met the night before. Plus the house has everything including a Platinum card to order anything and the satanic pentagram with candles in the basement. But the young ladies still have free reign of the house. This includes smoking lots of weed, watching a crazy amount of porn with the pizza guy, and hanging with their guys until a little demonic creature shows up and kills them in their bathroom. Once they understand they cannot leave the house as there seems to be a void outside of it they find a spell book. They also find a note inside explaining they are part of a demonic ritual to bring forth a demon god. The two decide to confront it in the basement with surprising results. Jason Coffman put together one amazing film as it made me laugh out loud six or seven times. The Indy flick isn’t just entertaining but gives you something unexpected and funny. I love this kind of stuff and kudos to Jason and company as I give this flick 3 ½ out of 4 stars. You can find out more about the film at www.facebook.com/Housesittermovie or www.housesittersmovie.com .

 

Even Hitler Had a Girlfriend (DVD) – Folks by far this movie is bad but the dialogue is absolutely entertaining and making this worth forcing yourself through. A lonely dude named Marcus is a security guard who has a lot of time on his hands. Marcus has trouble getting dates so he turns to cable porn until his father shows up on the TV and starts talking to him. So Marcus decides it’s time to call the hookers and negotiate terms. Of course like any lonely dude he wants to remember the occasion so he tape records the first session and video tapes the others. Marcus bleeds his savings to pay for all the hookers in a mere couple weeks. Lots of topless women and hilarious dialogue are the highlights of this bad but very entertaining movie. This movie doesn’t need to be watched but witnessed as I could see the MST3K guys bringing this film up every week for the next episode. So thank you filmmaker Ronnie Cramer for this gem as I give it 2 stars.

 

Trancers VI (DVD) – So I totally blanked this flick out of my mind when it was first released in the early 2000s. Mainly because no Jack Deth aka Tim Thomerson. Tim Thomerson is in the film but only clips from the other “Trancers” films. Anyway Jack has to go back down the line to ‘Old L.A. 2022’ because his daughter is in trouble. Someway, somehow Trancers are back. Jack believed he was retired, that he killed the last of them. After a meteor shower Jack’s daughter Jo gets mixed up with Trancers after she believes the meteor shower is being covered up. Her ex-boss and his assistant have found a meteor rock and using it to turn the young homeless of L.A. into Trancers they can control. The film has its heart in the right place but I doubt Charlie had much involvement or cared what was going on with this sequel? The effects were terrible and you could see there wasn’t much budget to work with but glad I gave it another chance. This sequel does raise questions such as why hasn’t there been a reboot or another sequel from Mr. Band and company because this series does have its own fan base? Unlike the idiotic “Evil Bong” commercials he calls movies. And you can’t tell me Tim Thomerson wouldn’t be up for one more as he did reprise the character for 30 seconds in one of the “Evil Bong” movies… I have several more questions I could ask about why Full Moon isn’t doing anything with this series but again the film’s heart was in the right place just poorly executed as I give it 1 ½ stars.

 

Mayday (DVD/Vimeo) – An interesting thriller about your typical airplane trip from L.A. to London that isn’t so typical once leaving the ground. All is well on Falcon Flight 88 until the lights begin to flicker, and then go out, and then a passenger disappears. Of course this makes everyone on board scared for their lives as they do not understand what actually happened. Air marshal Anderson (Michael Pare) takes action as this is his job. But after talking to the frantic wife about her husband disappearing he is just as baffled as anyone else on board. Lights flicker again and another passenger disappears. Then it happens again. Anderson struggling for answers begins to entertain the talk of the supernatural after a conversation with a nice lady on board that he is kind of sweet on. Is it supernatural forces at work or is it something else going on that cannot be explained? All Anderson knows with the pilot just disappearing anything can happen unless he solves the mystery or he will be the one trying to land the plane. Filmmaker Massimiliano Cerchi crafts an interesting story that makes your mind think when all the characters are introduced. The film is a different and wonderful thrill ride that stars one of my favorite actors Michael Pare who is all in with his role as the air marshal. Fun stuff here folks from Mr. Cerchi as I give it 3 out of 4 stars.

 

 

Any comments or questions please send to grossmoviereview@verizon.netor www.facebook.com/grossmoviereviews . Remember folks always support your local independent movie theater, independent video store, and independent filmmakers! It will keep horror alive………

Don’t forget you can also hear Kyle Poling and me talking about horror flicks on a weekly basis on the Bloodbaths and Boomsticks podcast at: www.bloodbathspodcast.blogspot.com/ also available at http://www.stitcher.com/podcast/kyle-poling-2/bloodbaths-and-boomsticks?refid=stpr

 

Plus you can always go to the greatest T-shirt place online or if you are in Texas visit the store of “Fast Custom Shirts” where T-shirt Joe is the only place you should purchase your horror T-shirts: Go to www.fastcustomshirts.com for details.

 

See yinz at GROSSFEST! July 28, 2018! Go check out www.grossfest.com for all the details!