Monthly Archives: June 2014

New episode up as the legendary Jon Cross joins us!

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This week we bring our grandparents back to high school & go down to the basement to review 3 noteworthy flicks from the back of your local video store.  And we are bringing along our favorite guest host (and close personal friend of Bendy Dick Slumber Crotch) JON CROSS.  Along the way we talk about what kind of movie inspired statue we would love to see in our home town.  The high side and low side of Kickstarter. We sing the praises of Peter Dinklage.  And Jon tells us why he did not like the new X-Men and he makes a good point too.

 

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EPISODE 121

Gross Movie Reviews #323

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Gross Movie Reviews #323

 

By Tim Gross

 

Syndrome (YouTube/DVD) – A short independent film written and directed by a cool young filmmaker Tim Novotny and it stars filmmaker Jim Roberts as the lead character (Nate). Nate is back from the war, depressed, crippled, you get the drift. Nate’s world is over but you as the viewer must decide is he dreaming? Already dead? Or is he a ghost now watching from afar? A cool short film that can make you think as I give it 2 ½ out of 4 stars.

Kids

Kids Get Dead 2: The Kids Get Deader (Vimeo/DVD) – You know me I will watch sequels… Especially when I haven’t seen the first film! But Darkstar Entertainment has just released Michael Hall’s independent slasher sequel. Casey survived the first film and suffers like most “survivor girl” syndrome. She wants answers why? Who was trying to kill her and friends? And so on… But makes this slasher different is Casey learns of author Charles Carver. An author whose books that he writes comes true just like what happen to her before so Casey goes looking for Mr. Carver for answers. Soon the masked killer is back on his killing spree again and Casey soon finds herself with more questions than answers and is unsure if Carver’s killer can be killed? I have to give it to filmmaker Michael Hall intentional or not the film has a little “In the Mouth of Madness”, a little “Wes Craven’s New Nightmare”, and a dash of a supernatural horror film that adds up to not being just your typical straight up slasher flick. I enjoyed the little twist, the gore looked cool, the usual slasher film amount of boobs make this an interesting watch for slasher fans as I give the flick 2 ½ out of 4 stars. You can find out more about it at www.darkstarentertainment.net .

 

Dragonslayer (DVD) – Its 1981 and it’s like a live action version of a Dungeons and Dragons story has come to life! And what makes this flick still cool to talk about is that after 30 years or so it still holds up as a great fantasy film. Virgins, dragons, sacrifices, I’m sold! Do yourself a favor and revisit this early 80s flick as I give it 3 ½ stars.

House

House of Oddities: The Story of the Atrocity Exhibition (Vimeo/DVD) – An amazing documentary that takes you on the journey of how a local Atrocity Exhibition got started and how some very different and passionate people make it happen. Independent filmmaker Brian Cottington lends his talents in filming this small group of artists that want to entertain people whether through art, theater, dance, etc. And give the mainstream something that isn’t looked at as your typical sideshow or freakshow but true art or freedom of expression. Cottington gives you an inside look of how a small group of artists came together from many walks of life and put together a show that not only has a loyal following but grows by the minute. A show that is very different from anything you have seen before and to keep people in attendance guessing they change the show every year. I believe this is a perfect documentary filmed by Brian Cottington for the mere fact this isn’t something I am into but after watching this has my full respect for what they do. Oddities they are not, artists they are and I am grateful for that and the people who were apart of this documentary. I give this wonderful film 4 out of 4 stars and can be seeked out at www.houseofodditiesmovie.com .

drybonesposter

Dry Bones (DVD) – Anytime a cool independent filmmaker such as Gregory Lamberson contacts you about a new flick you take notice… Especially when he was the dude that gave us the beautiful slime/gorefest “Slime City Massacre”! So when I got this screener I could not wait to sit down and watch a film that stars Debbie Rochon and Kevin Van Hat Trick aka Duane Smith aka just go watch “Basket Case” if you are not a nerd like I am. But anyway Lamberson’s latest is about a boy named Andrew who has a monster living under his bed and so frighten he is unsure that he can ever sleep again. Or it can be he is holding a piece of history in his hands (Fangoria #1, Godzilla cover) and knows how much it is worth? But anyway his dad (Bart) comes barging in because he cannot hear “Charlie’s Angels” and wants to put a beating upon Andrew but soon finds himself face to face with the hideous monster living under Andrew’s bed. Many years go by and Andrew now Drew has returned to town for the first time in years because his sister wants to sell their parents’ house. With nowhere to stay and needing to make repairs to the house before its sold Drew decides to move back to his original home thinking the monster is in his past. Drew was wrong! Soon Drew has strange dreams, all who enter are dying in a horrible manner, and the neighbors believe the home is haunted. A great independent horror film with cool practical monster effects and one of the best actresses ever as a Succubus… I want a sequel and I want Debbie Rochon in even more monster make-up because she makes it look so fun and awesome! All I got to say horror fans thank god for filmmakers like Gregory Lamberson as I give his new flick 3 ½ out of 4 stars.

 

After Dusk They Come (DVD) – Some rich people get shipwrecked on an island that just happens to have the offspring of Sasquatch and the cave creatures from “The Descent”. It’s worth wasting 80 or so minutes on as I give it 2 stars.

 

Things (DVD) – Possibly the most bizarre film I ever had the pleasure of watching. And that is saying a lot my friends. “Donnie Darko”… poop on you! “Fight Club”… go fuck yourself! “Eraserhead”… I’m still not sure? Just when I thought I seen all the warped mindfuck movies out there I come across Andrew Jordan’s ultra-fucking-weird no budget independent horror film that was shot on Super-8 in Canada and dubbed. Got your attention so far? Two friends go to a cabin in the middle of nowhere that just happens to be one of the fellows’ brother’s cabin. And his brother just had a weird dream about a naked woman in a basement with their monster baby and wakes up to his wife getting very sick. While the two dudes steal beer from the fridge Doug’s wife dies from a creature bursting out of her stomach that was an experiment from Dr. Lucas and now is multiplying throughout the house. Between the rambling nonsense called dialogue is a battle between these odd creatures and man in the ultimate bloodbath called, ‘survival’. And that is from what I can understand from watching this flick. I give this most bizarre flick 3 out of 4 stars for the mere fact I have never been so happy to own a movie!

 

Perished (YouTube) – A short film from SAR Films in the UK that is about a man who must decide suicide or figure out a way to outwit zombies that have him trapped inside a house. I give the flick 3 stars and really enjoyed the ending.

 

Halloween 2: H2 (DVD/remake) – Believe me if you ever talked to me about the first flick or read my review you understand why it took me so long to get over my anger to give this film a chance. And by the way I am still a little angry but I felt it enough time had pass to see what Rob Zombie did with the sequel and maybe figure out he doesn’t want a third film? The film begins in the hospital just like the original with Laurie and Annie in really bad shape. Laurie so worried about Annie goes to visit but of course Michael Myers is back to finish what he had started. Laurie wakes up in bed almost a year later living with Annie and Sheriff Brackett scarred, terrified, and dysfunctional. Meanwhile, Michael Myers has disappeared from the wrecked morgue van and hasn’t been seen. But Michael is seeing his dead mother and is told it is time to return to Haddonfield while Dr. Loomis is more of an asshole than the first film as he has written his next book all about the events of last Halloween. I enjoyed that Rob Zombie kept the characters evolving from the first film whether people liked it or not and paid homage to the original second film with the hospital scene. This movie has a grimier and gritty feel to it that the first film didn’t have and the gore keeps flowing. But also at the same time giving the drive to why Michael does what he does and why Laurie/Boo is so fucking screwed up. Am I happy there was a sequel let alone a remake, “HELL NO!” Did I get off my high horse and give this film a chance and glad I did, “YES I AM!” This sequel isn’t a horrible film and worth a watch if you are a hardcore fan of the original like me? It may have took two films for Rob Zombie to give us his full vision of Michael Myers good or bad but after watching this film and “Lords of Salem” I am grateful for Rob Zombie haunting Hollywood whether I agree or disagree with his movie choices and with that I give this film 2 stars.

 

Tony: London Serial Killer (DVD) – I haven’t seen a movie so boring since I pushed myself through the horrible feature “The Zombie Chronicles… in 3-D”. Next time I see this title come up I will just punch myself in the face and feel better that I did. I give it nothing as you should avoid it like the plague.

 

Any comments or questions please send to: GrossMovieReview@verizon.net, GrossMovieReview@aol.com or www.facebook.com/grossmoviereviews . Remember folks always support your local independent movie theater, independent video store, and independent filmmakers! It will keep horror alive………

You can always visit and see some past reviews, independent film news, or me ranting at: www.grossmoviereviews.com !!!

Also you now can purchase the co-directed film project from Daniel Boyd and I called, “Jagoff Massacre” at www.jagoffmassacre.com . There is a sequel in the works…

Don’t forget you can also hear Kyle Poling and me talking about horror flicks on a weekly basis on the Bloodbaths and Boomsticks podcast at http://bloodbathsandboomsticks.blogspot.com/ .

Plus you can always go to the greatest T-shirt place online or if you are in Texas visit the store of “Fast Custom Shirts” where T-shirt Joe is the only place that you can purchase a Gross Movie Reviews and Jagoff Massacre t-shirt but also Cannibal Campout, Woodchipper Massacre, and a Spookies T-shirts also!!!! Go to www.fastcustomshirts.com for details.

I haven’t watched one second of Game of Thrones so Kyle and T-shirt Joe team up for a special podcast!

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THE GIANT, VERY SPECIAL, ONE SHOT EPISODE, ABOUT GAME OF THRONES.  WITH KYLE AND T-SHIRT JOE


Kyle and fellow Game of Thrones fan T-Shirt Joe got together to record this one off episode.  And as 2 guys who have never read the books we won’t spoil anything for you.  We discuss our favorite people on the show, memorable episodes, and try to predict what will happen in the future. Also be sure to count the time we say “oh yeah, that dude.  Or, “you remember, that one guy”.  There will be a test later. And remember in the game of podcasts, you either win…… or you die.  So enjoy.

 

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game of thrones

Episode 120 we invite T-shirt Joe back so we can be all over the map of filmland!

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This week T-Shirt Joe comes back to the show to tell us about Racism on Star Trek.  Along the way we talk about how Richard Pryor should have killed superman.  Zombie STD’s,  How awesome Hannibal the T.V. series has been, Juggalo’s being sighted in Kyle’s neighborhood, John Carpenter’s appearance on the El Ray network,  Liam Neeson: THROATPUNCHER!  We also got Arthurian Knights in EXCALIBUR.  Robot teachers in CLASS OF 1999 and Class of 1999 part 2: the substitute.  And a northwestern Amish like slasher in AMERICAN GOTHIC.  So download and enjoy, or Rod Steiger might sell his soul to SATAN!!!

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episode 120

‘GUT’ STARS ADDED TO ‘VALLEY OF THE SASQUATCH’ CAST

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Seattle, WA –June 17th, 2014– The new horror film Valley of the Sasquatch is gearing up for production this month in Washington State. The film recently added some new faces to the cast that will be familiar to fans of 2012’s Gut.

Jason Vail played the lead role of Tom in Gut, a psychological horror film which met great success on the festival circuit before coming to home video last fall. In Valley of the Sasquatch, Vail will play the role of grieving father Roger Crew. Joining Vail on the film will be his Gut co-star Miles Joris-Peyrafitte, who will be portraying Roger’s son Michael. Vail and Joris-Peyrafitte join a cast that includes David Saucedo (Paranormal Activity: The Marked Ones), Bill Oberst Jr. (Resolution),and D’Angelo Midili (The Invoking).

Valley of the Sasquatch is a co-production between The October People and Votiv Films. You can follow the film on its Facebook page (Facebook.com/ValleyoftheSasquatch) or on Twitter (@SasquatchHorror).

Valley of the Sasquatch Synopsis: After losing their home following a devastating loss, a father and son are forced to move to an old family cabin. Neither reacts well to being thrown into this new world. The son’s attempts to relate to his father are complicated when two old friends arrive for a weekend of hunting. This trip into the forest will unearth not only buried feelings of guilt and betrayal, but also a tribe of Sasquatch that are determined to protect their land.
About The October People: The October People is a film production company based out of Seattle, WA and San Diego, CA. Earlier this year, the company’s first film The Invoking was released onto home video in the US & UK by Image Entertainment after receiving accolades from critics and audiences alike on the film festival circuit. Later this year, The October People will unveil two new releases. The alien abduction thriller The Device will come to home video this winter after a fall festival run. Alongside that will see the much anticipated home video release of Scott Schirmer’s acclaimed coming-of-age horror story Found. You can find more information on the company at www.theoctoberpeople.net

 

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Neo-Giallo Thriller CITY OF LUST coming to DVD & VOD July 1st

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Neo-Giallo Thriller CITY OF LUST coming to DVD & VOD July 1st
On July 1st, Brain Damage Films will release the indie horror-thriller City of Lust (previously titled “Yellow”), an imaginative and intense film styled in homage to Giallo horror films from the 1970’s but set in the present.  DVD availability is set to include many retailers and websites including Amazon, as well as rental chains including Family Video.  VOD availability will include all major and minor cable/satellite operators and internet platforms.
About the Film

City of Lust is a modern day Giallo film produced by Soft Cage Films, a not-for-profit art organization based out of Chicago.  World traveler and Writer/Director David A. Holcombe draws heavily from his serious involvement in both the Chicago film community as well as experimental theater.

The film uses many unconventional techniques and offers a claustrophobic atmosphere, sharp compositions, and radiant colors. City of Lust has been described by critics as being “smart, risk taking and edgy”.

Synopsis
Arianna is a young woman who moves to the city to escape a traumatic family life in the suburbs. She works as a cosmetologist and is showing early signs of formaldehyde poisoning. New to the city and lonely, she reaches out to a female sex line operator. They agree to meet and soon begin a volatile relationship. An altercation at work results in Arianna losing her job. Then, people in her life begin to turn up dead. With Arianna’s health, career, and new relationship all disintegrating before her eyes, how much longer can she, and those around her, survive?
Official Trailer and More Information
City

In episode 119 we celebrate Mary Woronov!!!

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This week Tim and Kyle have inadvertently picked 3 movies to cover that all have Mary Woronov in them… So I guess it’s our Mary Woronov triple feature show.  We talk about 1983’s epic rock and roll drug and humor filled quasi concert flick Get Crazy, Then Haley’s comet fuck shit up in Night of the Comet.  And lastly The Ramones blow up your High School in Rock and Roll High School.  Along the way we have all our usual chat so enjoy.  And side note, this episode is dropping on Friday the 13th, so we hope you all like this show in which we don’t even say a word about the aforementioned franchise.  So have some fun and Gabba Gabba Hey.

 

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Episode 119

Gross Movie Reviews #322

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Gross Movie Reviews #322

 

By Tim Gross

 

Class of 1984 (VHS) – Its Lincoln High and all the students seem to be violent, carrying guns, drugs, etc. Teachers are at the point they just try to get through the day without being stabbed or what not. So when Perry King a new teacher from Nebraska arrives he is in for a culture shock as all he wants to do is teach music to teenagers. In order to restore order teachers Perry King and Roddy McDowall must take on a certain gang that rules the school. This movie inspired a slew of 80s teacher/gang/school violence related films including the same director doing “Class of 1999”. Great film just because of legendary actor Roddy McDowall but also has budding star Michael J. Fox as I give it 3 ½ out of 4 stars.

 

Don’t Go In The Woods (DVD) – I was surprised to learn that Vincent D’Onofrio decided to do a horror film that went to the Tribeca Film Festival no less. But that is where the interesting part ends as a young band goes into the woods to write and record songs without booze, sex, and drugs. For me the movie never seems to get going and when it finally does more than halfway through the film I disinterested someone decided to kill these unlikable characters that are trying to record music. I might revisited this film again in a year or two just to see if I feel the same way but until then I give the film 1 star.

 

Pontypool (DVD) – An oddity of a film that stars great character actor Stephen McHattie as an over the top DJ who is working at a less than high profile radio station in Canada when some strange events break out in Ontario. While on air he tries to report about the chaos that is consuming people and buildings. Soon he gets reports that a virus is spreading through the English language causing people to lose their mind and attack others. There is a couple other films with the same concept and do it well also but this film just has such a curious, odd feel to it that I cannot classify it as a zombie film but believe it is a must watch for any horror fan looking for that different kind of horror film! I give the film 3 ½ stars.

 

Jack Reacher (DVD) – A Tom Cruise flick that was shot in my hometown Pittsburgh, Pa. The film was originally called, “One Shot” but title like most quickly changed once filming wrapped up. But wait Tim Gross is watching another Tom Cruise flick. Heard great things about the film so I figured I would force myself to sit long enough to give it a chance… And I was not disappointed. Someone guns down five people in front of PNC Park that seems like random crazy violence only to frame a half ass sniper from the military. Once in questioning the only thing the man says after 16 hours to the police is “Jack Reacher”. Jack Reacher is a former MP who was great at his job and seems to be a ghost as he went off the grid a few years ago. Once the story goes national Reacher arrives in Pittsburgh to have a conversation with the man’s lawyer and do his own investigation which uncovers a much bigger plot. The film is awesomely written and Tom Cruise plays the part of Jack Reacher perfectly. It’s a kick ass action flick I did not expect and with this latest project Cruise is beginning to restore my faith in him as an actor but also his projects. Do yourself a favor and check out this cool flick if you haven’t seen it. But what’s even cooler is that they used all of Pittsburgh so well and really thought they did a great job of using the extras in the flick and making them true Pittsburghers except none said “Yinz”! I give the film 3 ½ stars.

 

The Bunnyman Massacre (DVD/Chiller TV) – Once I found out this was a sequel and had massacre in the title you knew my ass couldn’t stay away. One problem, it was a sequel to the lackluster film “Bunnyman” about a serial killer in a bunny suit. Sounds like it should be fucking awesome but gives you a headache instead just thinking about it. So somebody thought it would be good to continue it… bad move filmmaker. The film opens up with the killer in a bunny suit trying to kill a whole school bus of children which looked like total ass! And that is being kind to it. But from there the story revolves around the killer hanging out on a farm where some hick understands what the killer is and takes care of him while he turns the local police into beef jerky. Once they target some hikers in the woods as their next victims you know where the film goes from there. I could spend days on what is wrong with this film besides it giving me an upsetting headache but just do me a favor and do not do a third film and move on to a different project. Another thing that really bothered me was the computerized blood that hits the camera during murder scenes, STOP IT NOW! It looks like shit and can be utterly insulting, now saying that this isn’t the only film that has done it. There have been several low budget projects in the past year or two that have thought this is a good idea? YOU WERE WRONG! Personally I believe with the title and a killer in a bunny suit I believe you should have taken full advantage of making it more of a holiday slasher film… We need more holiday horror again, but hey that is just me. Moving on I give the flick a ½ star out of 4. If by some chance you are curious seeing it you can find it at www.midnightreleasing.com .

Cap Z

Captain Z & The Terror of Leviathan (DVD/You Tube) – Indy filmmaker/writer Steve Rudzinski is back at again with another project as he is one of the hardest working filmmakers out there that you the viewer should pay attention too! (Robert Elkins and Dustin Wayde Mills just to mention a couple others) Steve chooses to go away from his last kid-friendly film “Super Task Force One” to give us a time traveling pirate film. It’s 1714 Riverwood where a bad ass pirate is fighting a cult of demons who are trying to bring some evil through a portal of some kind only to screw up the ritual and they all time travel to 2014 where in Riverwood, Ohio where Captain Z and his adventures is stuff of legend and celebrated every year. Once in the present Captain Z and the demons must adjust to 300 years into the future and do it quickly as they search for the amulet that could sway the struggle between and good and evil either way. But with some help from the very funny character Professor Glen Stewart supernatural expert and volunteers from the local museum, Captain Z finds and tries to protect the amulet from the demons new forms that are some inbred fishing rednecks that want to see their sister/daughter naked. Captain Z even finds time to learn how to drive, find a winch, and find his treasure in this amazing and incredibly crafted offbeat independent feature. Movie fans I am here to say Steve Rudzinski is starting to hit his stride as a writer, director, and an actor. If you have paid attention at all to his career the biggest payoff might be Steve’s ability to grow as an actor and his ability to learn from past projects as a director. Steve proves you don’t have to stick with one genre as an independent filmmaker and for that I am grateful. Oh by the way yinz will love the chainsaw scene!!! I give this hilarious flick 3 out of 4 stars and warn readers now start paying attention to Steve Rudzinski now, you’ll thank me later! Now go buy his film: http://captainz.moonfruit.com/buy-the-movie/4582618664

 

Death Row Diner (VHS) – A funny SOV horror flick from 1988 that stars Michelle Bauer as a granddaughter of a movie executive (Otis) that was framed for murder in 1948 and sent to death in “The Big House”. Now 40 years later, she is producing a flick with her despicable husband in the same place. An undead Otis returns hungry and is pissed off so he is murdering all involved with the project. The movie is a funny horrible reminder of what low budget filmmaking was like in the 80s. Hell, we even get a bad Elvis impersonator who works for Celebrity Catering. I give the film 2 stars.

 

Any comments or questions please send to: GrossMovieReview@verizon.net, GrossMovieReview@aol.com or www.facebook.com/grossmoviereviews . Remember folks always support your local independent movie theater, independent video store, and independent filmmakers! It will keep horror alive………

You can always visit and see some past reviews, independent film news, or me ranting at: www.grossmoviereviews.com !!!

Also you now can purchase the co-directed film project from Daniel Boyd and I called, “Jagoff Massacre” at www.jagoffmassacre.com . There is a sequel in the works…

Don’t forget you can also hear Kyle Poling and me talking about horror flicks on a weekly basis on the Bloodbaths and Boomsticks podcast at http://bloodbathsandboomsticks.blogspot.com/ .

Plus you can always go to the greatest T-shirt place online or if you are in Texas visit the store of “Fast Custom Shirts” where T-shirt Joe is the only place that you can purchase a Gross Movie Reviews and Jagoff Massacre t-shirt but also Cannibal Campout, Woodchipper Massacre, and a Spookies T-shirts also!!!! Go towww.fastcustomshirts.com for details.

BUNNYMAN MASSACRE hopping its way to Home Video this August 12th

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Midnight Releasing is set to unleash the demented Bunnyman Massacre this August on DVD and VOD across North America.  Also known as “Bunnyman 2”, the film is a drastically improved sequel to the 2011 cult hit Bunnyman which gained notoriety from a huge amount of press, as well as being in heavy rotation on the cable TV channel CHILLER.  Availability information is forthcoming.

 

 

About the Film

The Bunny Man character was inspired by the true story of an axe-wielding man in a bunny suit who terrorized residents of Fairfax County, Virginia in 1970.  Going wild with that inspiration, writer/director Carl Lindbergh and his company ANOC Productions created and released Bunnyman in 2011.  Despite mixed reviews, the film gained a sizable following and has been known to play back-to-back on the cable TV channel Chiller.

 

Bunnyman Massacre was completed in 2013 and it’s obvious that the ANOC Productions crew took notes from the response to the first film — This one is leaps and bounds (pun intended) ahead of the original in all aspects from the visual quality to the acting, direction, story, and horror elements.  Bunnyman Massacre premiered on Chiller over Easter weekend this year.

 

If you like your horror served with heaps of gore, lots of kills, memorable characters, and dashes of nudity, humor and general offensiveness, this film is certainly for you.  And with a third installment in production, Carl Lindbergh’s bloody and furry creation is on track for true horror franchise status.

 

“Inspired by the fans requests, Bunnyman 2 aka The Bunnyman Massacre was born,” explains Lindbergh. “With Bunnyman 2 we were able to realize the potential of Bunnyman 1, and at the same time create a franchise that will continue with Bunnyman 3 (which is currently in production.) What I appreciate with The Bunnyman Massacre is that we were able to make a film that really stands apart from all the countless slasher films, and deliver a film that is very unique.”

 

 

Synopsis

The adventures of Joe and Bunnyman know no limit of bloodlust and carnage. Bodies pile up as Bunnyman indiscriminately slaughters anything that crosses his path in a mutually beneficial relationship that gives Joe plenty of beef jerky to sell in his local store.

 

 

Official Trailer and More Information:

http://midnightreleasing.com/bunnyman-massacre/

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=kHChFeABTGg

https://www.facebook.com/bunnymanmassacre

 

Bunnyman Massacre