New Bloodbaths and Boomsticks episode is up!

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On this week’s episode we got heists, cannibalistic forefathers, velpcaraptors in Vietnam, command ninjas, and jort sportin’ super Mario’s as we cover COMMAND NINJA, THE WASHINGTONIANS, and DEN OF THIEVES.   We also chat about what we’ve been watching this week, answer your listener questions, and go through all the news that’s fit to print.  We also fall down a Danny Trejo based wormhole looking for pig people movies.  Do we come back?  Who cares!  So download this episode of Fiddy will fuck with your daughter’s prom date.

http://bloodbathspodcast.blogspot.com/

 

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New guest announcement for Grossfest 2019

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Guest announcement: He is one of the most multi-talented independent filmmakers you could ever meet. He has his own website that streams and available for purchase his films and music called, “Henflix”. He has acted in over 30 films and has directed two dozen films. You name it; he has done it in front of the camera and behind it and does not stick to one genre. Depression: The Movie, Babysitter Massacre, Calamity Jane’s Revenge are a few of his notable films. I could write pages on how cool this once a generation talent is but how about you come on down to Grossfest this July 20th and meet him yourself. I introduce you to the one and only Henrique Couto!
www.facebook.com/henriquecouto
www.grossfest.com

Gross Movie Reviews #459

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Gross Movie Reviews #459

 

Superstition (DVD) – In 1692, a witch is burned at the stake but before she dies she of course curses all involved and their families. Now in 1982, a family looking for a fresh start moves into a long empty house that has some history of people dying over the years. Never mind an old retired priest allows them to move in knowing the possibility of death and that the swimming pond out back was placed there to keep the evil witch at bay. Which by the way the pond doesn’t work that well. The neighbor warns them of the strange stuff and the weirdo son of course is the suspect the police are looking for. But who cares a crazy buzz saw flies into the chest of another priest who hoped the curse was gone! If you were a person that frequent the video stores in the 80s good chance you seen the VHS box at one point. The film not great but not horrible either as it is a reminder of movies you never heard of and would take a chance on renting them in the 80s. I give it 2 ½ stars.

 

Superstition 2 (YouTube) – The Italian sequel was released in 1989 and was mostly known under the title “Witch Story”. It has very little to do with the first film other than a witch cursing everyone and a cross that can fend the witch off. A brother and sister take their college friends to an abandoned home they inherited and has some bad history. Even though this film involves a witch it has more of a demon flick tone as demons possess some of the young people and turn them on each other. If there is one reason to watch this it is for the bad ass scene involving a dude in a pond about to get a chainsaw to the skull from his possessed girlfriend! I give the sequel 2 stars but in the end don’t make a whole of sense.

 

Lady Avenger (VHS) – David DeCoteau directs, Michelle Bauer shows up topless at least three times, and William Butler plays the boyfriend of Maggie our “Lady Avenger”. The woman that plays Maggie also goes on about a year or so later to be in Playboy. Anyway Maggie has just got out of the big house to go to her brother’s funeral. Pissed off and wanting answers she breaks away from her protective custody to get to the boatyard to ask questions. After kicking three dudes ass and gets away from them in a fiery car chase she bangs her boyfriend and gets back on the case. As she begins to piece things together of all involved she realizes the people she wants revenge against are much closer to her than she thinks. This of course ups the level of wanting revenge where she goes all Robert “The Exterminator” Ginty with a flamethrower. A fun C-grade action flick that was a direct-to-video back in 1988 as I give this flick 2 ½ stars.

 

A Bay of Blood (DVD) – A 1971 Mario Bava film that has many death scenes stolen by the “Friday the 13th” films whether horror fans admit it or not.  Because of an older woman unwilling to sell her beautiful land and we get some fast and furious murders. The movie begins with two murders. One is the older woman who is made to look like a suicide. Then who killed her is then killed by an unknown person and his body is made to disappear so no one can find it. A wonderful film of double crosses with an excellent ending. For one reason or another Bava has never been in my wheelhouse so I am not a fan nor a hater but willing to check out his films when I come across them. I give it 2 ½ stars.

Death Kiss (On Demand) – So are you a fan of Chuck Bronson and the “Death Wish” films then you will enjoy bootleg Bronson in this low budget homage to those films. We meet a DJ played by Daniel Baldwin who just rages against the city police for not doing their job. That maybe a vigilante is needed? In comes bootleg Chuck Bronson who doesn’t use many words but has many uses for hand guns to bring down criminals. He steals the money from the criminals he brings down and hands it off to a single mother of a little girl in a wheelchair. Thinking she is charity and needs to pay bootleg Chuck backed she tries her best to find out more about him. But bootleg Bronson has his reasons and keeps them at arm’s length. The movie is absolutely a lot of nostalgia and fun. The movie isn’t perfect but a wonderful gift for us Bronson fans to fill the void as I give this flick 3 stars.

 

The Horseman (On Demand) – A hidden low budget gem from Australia about a 44-year old father who has just lost his daughter under suspicious circumstances. The father is sent a porn video that stars his daughter who was used by four men and was under the influence of heavy drugs. After seeing this it sends the man into a primal rage to seek out all involved, torture them horribly, and end their lives for what they did to his daughter. As he travels on the highway on his quest he picks up a hitchhiking teenager named Alice. Alice and the man become friends on the road but she knows nothing of his quest for revenge. The story is gritty, screwed up, and this dude has a thing about fucking up people’s dicks! This is literally one bad ass air pump to the penis as I give it 3 ½ stars and yes the father uses a tire pump!

 

Halloween: The Panhandle Massacre (YouTube) – A not-for-profit fan film written and directed by Dean Thomas stars David Dietz as Dr. Loomis’ grandson who oversees Michael Myers. Myers has broken out again and is loose near the Panhandle Trail in Pittsburgh back on his murder spree. Authorities have no clue what to do but Dr. Loomis is there to help guide detectives in the capture or killing of Myers to stop the unstoppable killer again. Well-acted and well produced music for the fan made film makes it one of the better “Halloween” fan made features I have seen over the years as I give it 2 ½ out of 4 stars.

Babes in Psycho Land (DVD) – Two of my favorite filmmakers are back as the feature is directed by the intelligent David Silvio and produced and written by his equally talented wife Diana Silvio. The film is a simple story about Mary trying to reopen her home for foster kids and Andy trying to deal with his bizarre issues. Apparently some time ago Andy’s twin Alex and a girl named Jenny that Andy had a crush on were killed. So anytime Andy comes in contact with a female like Officer Piper Paisley, he believes it is Jenny and swears he won’t hurt her. But it always ends horribly wrong and as Officer Paisley gets pulled into this bizarre world of Mary, Andy, and the foster home she begins to enjoy it too much. Andy finding females again Mary, head of the house is not at all happy but Mary has her own bizarre issues as she is told she may not reopen. The movie rides the edge of sanity really well as it brings you into a bizarre world of you are not sure who the actual victim is and gives you that wonderful uneasy feeling in the pit of your stomach. Kiss of Death Productions once again makes a film that cannot be classified but is must-see independent film that is a cut above most. The whole cast plays their roles perfectly including those of Jack and Cassandra at the end of the film. The Silvios don’t make films for everyone but they do make films for people who are looking for something different and interesting every time out. I give this cringe-worthy movie 3 ½ out 4 stars.

 

Warrior of the Lost World (VHS) – Robert Ginty is a man who rides his super cycle through the Wasteland that might be the only hope for what’s left of mankind. As he rides he is chased by a brutal police force of the ‘Omega’ where he is forced to drive into a wall of rock. Lucky for ‘the rider’ aka Robert Ginty he is pure or at least according to Fred Williamson and ‘the elders’. He has been chosen to help infiltrate the ‘omega’ and help a man escape who is being tortured by the leader Donald freakin Pleasence! Sounds fun, has a great cast, a talking motorcycle, but somehow doesn’t translate into cinema gold? David Worth who is also known for giving us “Shark Attack 2 & 3”, “Kickboxer”, and “Hazard Jack” didn’t seem to have much to work with in Italy but did his best. I give this flick 2 stars as the cast outshines the hokey film.

 

The Park is Mine (YouTube) – Totally forgot how good this film is starring Tommy Lee Jones as a Vietnam vet Mitch who has lost a friend recently. The friend’s dying wish is for Mitch to use his plan to take over Central Park for a few days till Veteran’s Day. His hope is people will take notice and appreciate what these vets did and stop being mistreated. So Mitch goes ahead with the plan unsure if it would work but it does. He asks the commissioner to give him 72 hours to keep the park empty. That is all well and good until the deputy mayor gets involved and things begin to get messy. All the deputy mayor wants is Mitch to die and go away especially when he sends in two mercs to take him down. But meanwhile a reporter with a camera gets in the park and gets to videotape what Mitch is trying to do. I give this film 3 ½ stars and its message of how Vietnam vets were forgotten and mistreated is still relevant today.

 

The House That Would Not Die (DVD/YouTube) – A 1970 TV movie where Ruth and Sara inherit a home that was built in the late 1700s. Apparently Ruth’s cousin took a liking to Ruth when she was young and left the house to her. But the old Campbell house has a haunting history and strange things begin to happen to Sara after a fun séance is done and a spirit enters Sara. The problem is restless spirits live beyond a fake wall in the basement that seeks answers for their peaceful death slumber. A very PG-rated paranormal film is the best thing I can say about the old TV movie as I give it 1 ½ stars.

 

Any comments or questions please send to grossmoviereview@verizon.netor www.facebook.com/grossmoviereviews . Remember folks always support your local independent movie theater, independent video store, and independent filmmakers! It will keep horror alive………

Don’t forget you can also hear Kyle Poling and me talking about horror flicks on a weekly basis on the Bloodbaths and Boomsticks podcast at: www.bloodbathspodcast.blogspot.com/ also available at http://www.stitcher.com/podcast/kyle-poling-2/bloodbaths-and-boomsticks?refid=stpr

Plus you can always go to the greatest T-shirt place online or if you are in Texas visit the store of “Fast Custom Shirts” where T-shirt Joe is the only place you should purchase your horror T-shirts: Go to www.fastcustomshirts.com for details.

Grossfest 2 is coming… July 20, 2019, check our Grossfest Facebook page and www.grossfest.comfor details and upcoming guests. #grossfest #grossfest2019

TERROR FILMS has teamed up with CYFUNO VENTURES to release some cool stuff!

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Los Angeles, CA – (Tuesday, January 22nd, 2019) – TERROR FILMS has teamed up with CYFUNO VENTURES to release: AFTER DARK, HELL TOWN, ASYLUM THE LOST TAPES and DON’T F*CK IN THE WOODS internationally. These films will appear on: Amazon Prime, Google Play and iFlix; the launch begins this Tuesday, January 29th.

The films, all of which have been released domestically by various distributors, will now be available digitally in multiple countries including: the U.K., Ireland, Asia, Africa and many others.

From Scream Queens to Killer Creatures, Scary-ass Ghosts and Dumb Twenty-Somethings putting themselves in deadly situations, there’s something for everyone in these titles. TERROR FILMS is sharing a promotional sizzle reel (found below) and banner created just for the international release. You can learn more about the films here.

The Official Sizzle Reel: https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=BIXGPAQ2c2o

 

 

 

AFTER DARK – Spring break for seven college students is derailed after a flat tire leaves them deserted on a dark road and stranded with a menacing drifter.

HELL TOWN – From award-winning directors Steve Balderson and Elizabeth Spear and Scream Queen Debbie Rochon comes this special feature presentation comprised of three episodes from the never before released prime-time, melodramatic whodunnit, horror-comedy series.

ASYLUM THE LOST FOOTAGE – A group of amateur ghost hunters go missing after they journey into the bowels of an abandoned Insane Asylum, in a search for evidence of paranormal activity. Video cards, salvaged from the building, reveal the tragic fate of the missing ghost hunters.

DON’T F*CK IN THE WOODS – A group of friends, on a camping trip to celebrate graduating college, soon find their good times ruined when they viciously attacked by a mysterious creature.

To Learn More About Terror Films visit: http://www.terrorfilms.net

Or: https://www.facebook.com/TerrorFilmsLLC

More on Cyfuno Ventures visit: https://www.cyfuno.com

Gross Movie Reviews #458

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Gross Movie Reviews #458

 

The Happytime Murders (On Demand) – In a world where puppets and humans exist together a private eye who happens to be a puppet and a former cop gets a case from a sexy young lady puppet. The case isn’t open and shut as he likes as someone is killing all the puppets involved with a very popular kids show from the 90s. The private eye finds himself soon teamed up with his ex-partner, a human trying to solve the mystery of who is the killer? Lots of adult humor, the puppets looked great, and a cool buddy cop flick of sorts. This wasn’t as much as “Meet the Feebles” as I thought it would be so good for them. I didn’t love it and I didn’t hate it but worth at least a watch as I give it 2 stars.

 

Upgrade (On Demand) – This should have been the “Robocop” remake! A mechanic named Grey rebuilds a classic Trans-Am in the near future for a super-rich computer whiz. After Grey and his wife begin driving home from dropping the car off they are in a bad car accident and his wife is killed by some thugs. Grey is paralyzed, but is given the chance to try an experimental computer chip that should restore all feeling back to his limbs and help him move again. Grey agrees and has implanted into his spine and STEM the computer chip almost works immediately. But Stem also thinks and talks for itself and decides to start talking Grey and help him find his wife’s killers. Grey unsure at first slowly allows STEM to show him he is quicker, smarter, better now. Grey uses his paralyzed status to track down all involved without being detected as a suspect. Once Grey goes down this wormhole with STEM there is very cool twists in the plot that make the movie a must rewatch several times. Plus I believe the plot hits on a nerve of this not too distant future could be very real sooner than we think? This action flick is absolutely amazing as I give it 4 stars.

 

Hotel Artemis (On Demand) – A weirdo flick set in the not so distant future of 2028 where Jodie Foster is a manager/doctor to a hotel or safe house for criminals. Criminals pay big bucks for these certain safe houses all over the world if by some chance they are injured in some way. If you do not have a membership you are thrown out on your ass. Foster’s character is a shut-in who has lots of anxiety and hasn’t the outside world in a couple decades. But it all goes to shit when the big boss comes to be fixed up and there is an assassin there inside the hotel to take him out. This flick is one of those check your brain at the door and just enjoy the entertainment. I give the film 2 ½ stars.

You Might be the Killer (DVD) – This is one those slasher flicks that doesn’t overthink the plot and just has a lot of fun with what it is. Sam is a good dude who once a year takes time away from his business and goes off the grid for a weekend. He goes to a camp with a bunch of friends and just has wholesome camp fun. But a big problem arises when he is calling his best friend Chuck (Alyson Hannigan) because he believes a psycho killer has killed all the campers and now is stalking him? They go through all the movie clichés until Sam remembers at some point the story about a cursed mask being at a dead tree was actually real and he put the mask on. When he has the mask on he is an unstoppable killer who slaughters his friends in many brutal ways. When the mask is off he doesn’t recall anything and believes he is being stalked also. I loved watching this bloody flick that never took itself serious and delivered the goods on just being a fun horror flick to watch as I give it 3 stars.

Commando Ninja (YouTube) – This absolute 4 star gem is from the mind Ben Combes. Ben decided to kickstart his love letter of a movie to 80s action movie genre. This film combines at least 20 different action film ideas into one movie. The film begins with a flashback of 1968 Vietnam where a recon team led by John Hunter is ambushed by ninjas with Predator vision. Then the story flashes forward to 1986 where John Hunter is approached by an old Green Beret vet to let him know the evil ninjas are back and John’s daughter gets kidnapped by these evil creatures. From there it flashes back and forth between 1968 and 1986 showing where John got his ninja training and how he tracks down the evil ninjas that took his daughter. But just when you thought it couldn’t get any more ridiculous he has to time travel to the future in 1998 to get her back. Before I forget there are also dinosaurs and cyborgs in this film and the Trans-am in 1998 like the one in “Smokey in the Bandit”. This is a must own for any 80s action film lover as it leaves no stone unturned bringing its brilliant story to life. I give this project 4 stars and a front runner for one of the best films I have watched in 2019.

 

Bigfoot Ate My Boyfriend (DVD) – The film opens of course stating that it was based on true events. Sheriff Bailey has a situation on her hands as bodies are piling up in the woods and news wants to know what is going on. So she calls in the only local Federal Bigfoot Investigator she knows to help her track it down and stop it. But a former child star Jimmy Johnson of ‘Kung-fu Kid’ has plans of his own of going into the woods and challenging Bigfoot to a fight and getting it on film. Thus the event should thrust him back into Hollywood stardom. A hilarious but bad film about a Bigfoot that growls like a poodle when attacking and I am damn glad to own it as I give it 2 out of 4 stars. More info on the film can be found at www.gatorbladefilms.com .

 

Project: Eugenics (DVD) – A bad end of the world zombie film with not many zombies and is to be continued at the end of the film. The premise is a corporation called Eugenics wants to experiment on millions of citizens to see if a zombie vaccine works and they get all the profit. I give it 1 star.

 

Over the Edge (DVD) – A 1979 film that was based on a true event involving unruly teenagers and a Midwest community in the mid-70s. With the cities becoming overrun with crime and drugs, many families began to move out to rural areas where communities where were being built for people trying to escape the city life. Or what would become known eventually as the suburbs. This community of New Granada is supposed to be a wonderful place for families but a lot of their population is teenagers with nothing to do except for one rec center for entertainment. When a piece of land is no longer going to be a drive-in and bowling alley and going to have office space built on it the young people get upset. On top of that a rogue cop closes down the rec center soon things get out of control between the young people, the adults, and the cop. The film is watchable and stars a young Matt Dillon but doesn’t really have a character you really connect or root for. There are several other films of the early 80s that make this formula work better on film as I give the cautious tale of “Parents talk to your kids” 2 stars.

 

Den of Thieves (On Demand) – A wild action/crime flick where a crew of bank robbers try to pull off one of the biggest heists of the century and must deal with a L.A. sheriff that doesn’t always play by the rules. The crew is led by a man named Merrimen who been imprisoned for the past decade and use that time to plan a heist at the Federal Bank Reserve. Meanwhile the sheriff played by Gerard Butler knows Merrimen has something planned but always seems to be one step behind. A way better heist flick than you would ever believe so give it a chance as I give it 3 ½ stars.

 

Category III: The Untold Story of Hong Kong Exploitation (DVD) – A wonderful documentary documenting how this rating came in existence in Hong Kong cinema and how it has changed after 1997. A good bit of Hong Kong’s popular films took advantage of this rating and produced some of the greatest over the top films the world ever seen. Its peak existence was between the years 1988-1997 and they explained what led to the rating being made and what happened to Hong Kong cinema after China took control again in 1997. Very interesting stories behind Hong Kong cinema and some of the titles I have watched or heard over the years while searching for movies in video stores. I give the documentary 3 ½ stars.

 

Nude Nuns with Big Guns (DVD) – The title says it all as there really isn’t much to the plot except nuns being made to make drugs for bikers who work for the Catholic Church. Then the drugs are sold everywhere. When Sister Sarah is pimped out and pumped full of drugs she is saved by a so-called witch doctor. Sister Sarah in the drugged out dreamland receives a message from god to kill all that are involved with the drug trade. So becomes the nun vigilante that cannot be stopped as she massacres everyone for what they did to her. Fun B-movie crap that has big boobs, bullets, and lots of blood as I give 2 ½ stars too.

 

Any comments or questions please send to grossmoviereview@verizon.netor www.facebook.com/grossmoviereviews . Remember folks always support your local independent movie theater, independent video store, and independent filmmakers! It will keep horror alive………

Don’t forget you can also hear Kyle Poling and me talking about horror flicks on a weekly basis on the Bloodbaths and Boomsticks podcast at: www.bloodbathspodcast.blogspot.com/ also available at http://www.stitcher.com/podcast/kyle-poling-2/bloodbaths-and-boomsticks?refid=stpr

Plus you can always go to the greatest T-shirt place online or if you are in Texas visit the store of “Fast Custom Shirts” where T-shirt Joe is the only place you should purchase your horror T-shirts: Go to www.fastcustomshirts.com for details.

Grossfest 2 is coming… July 20, 2019, check our Grossfest Facebook page and www.grossfest.comfor details and upcoming guests. #grossfest #grossfest2019

Terror Films acquires the rights to the film Close Calls

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(Tuesday, January 8th, 2019) – TERROR FILMS has acquired the rights to writer/director Richard Stringham’s debut feature film CLOSE CALLS! The film is set to be released across multiple digital platforms Friday, January 11th.

The film centers around Morgan MacKenzie (Jordan Phipps) – a troubled teen with a checkered past, who finds herself grounded by her father (Kristof Waltermire). Bored and left alone to deal with her ailing and crazy grandmother (Janis Duley), Morgan soon becomes the target of a psycho caller. As the night gets weirder, paranoia begins to set in and Morgan is forced to face some of her worst fears and inner demons as she starts to believe that everyone she knows is either plotting against her or trying to kill her.

The CLOSE CALLS Official Trailer: https://youtu.be/Oa4PWiW35Fs

CLOSE CALLS (produced, written and directed by Richard Stringham) has been well received by critics with SCREAM MAGAZINE stating: “Richard Stringham has crafted a clever, unique motion picture that goes well beyond merely being a valentine to its influences. The film offers some humor to occasionally lighten up the suspenseful proceedings, and Stringham proves himself as a talent to watch with this striking celluloid calling card.”

The film has also been well received at film festivals, having been the official selection and winner at multiple festivals. Festival participation includes: the Hollywood Dreams International Film Festival and Writers’ Celebration, the Hot Springs International Horror Film Festival (Won: Best in Category – Best First-Time Filmmaker Feature), the Los Angeles Horror Competition (Won: Diamond Award-Best Feature Film), the Maverick Movie Awards, the NYC Horror Film Festival (Won: Best Cinematography, Best Director) and the Spotlight Horror Film Awards (Won: Silver Award – Best Film).

The film will be available on Amazon Instant Video, iTunes, Vudu, Google Play, Tubi TV and Steam and additional platforms at a later date. In advance of the film’s release this Friday, TERROR FILMS is sharing some stills, the Official Trailer and Poster below.

To learn more about TERROR FILMS, visit: www.terrorfilms.net

And here: https://www.facebook.com/TerrorFilmsLLC

To learn more about CLOSE CALLS, visit: https://www.facebook.com/CloseCallsTheMovie/

If you liked Jagoff Massacre? Guess what we are working on now…

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Well everyone, I promised big news coming soon from the Jagoffs at Drunken Yinzers productions, and here it is! While we would love to tell you that a sequel to Jagoff Massacre is coming, we simply can’t do it without Brandon. As soon as he is available we will get our asses on that (the script is already written so…). In the meantime we felt it was time to move onto a new project. And goddamn is it a great one!
A few years back, during the first round of problems with jagoff 2, I had the brilliant idea to write a comedic remake of the classic terrible drug scare film, Blood Freak. After the dissolution of JOM2 and the near death of our production company, we finally decided to take this script and give it a shot. We’re now 2 shoots in and it’s honestly some of the most hilarious shit we’ve ever done.

So next year we will bring you a new film from the Drunken Yinzers! We’ll be setting up a new Facebook page soon and hope you’ll all join us in this new endeavor. And yes, while this is a new film, it does take place in the Jagoff-verse so look out for easter eggs galore. And of course Chuck Connors will be back as well as a slew of JOM favorites. I can’t possibly express how much i truly appreciate all of you Jags that have stood by and waited patiently for us to get our shit together. We love you all more than a case a cold Irons and a primanti’s sammich!

…and if you wanna check out the movie we’re paying tribute to, you can watch it in it’s entirety here….

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=np3bqodkka0

 

Post written by “Out of Print” Daniel Boyd last month

Grossfest is looking for Vendors!

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With the holidays over and the new year underway, why not get involved with a great up and coming independent horror convention, GROSSFEST! Saturday, July 20th, 2019

With our first year being a big success and vendor spaces selling out quickly, we have changed to a new location and are able to add more vendors! Located at
Doubletree hotel
340 racetrack road
Washington pa 15301

If interested please email us grossfest@gmail.com
Tables are only $50!

www.grossfest.com

#grossfest

 

Don’t forget if you are a filmmaker contact me about getting your film to our Grossfest contest?

Check out all of our end of the year lists at Bloodbaths and Boomsticks

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This week we call a close to Christmas and introduce Kyle to an all-time Santa jam that he has never seen in CHRISTMAS EVIL.  John talks about a really cool 50’s monster movie with a lot more going on than it seems in THE CRAWLING EYE A>K>A> THE TROLLENBERG TERROR.  Then Kyle (who doesn’t give a shit about Christmas) talks about a truly lost film in NINJA BUSTERS starring a third rate Kung Fu Cheech and Chong and that one dude from Big Trouble in Little China.  Plus we answer your questions and tell all the news that’s fit to print… or make up if you’re Bloody Disgusting.  

http://bloodbathspodcast.blogspot.com/

 

 

Christmas vacation is over… the overtime has died down… and we say goodbye to 2018, but not before we have our say.  Join Kyle, Tim, John, and special guest T-Shirt Joe in recalling the worst and best movies we all saw in 2018.  This is the giant sized special annual get the fuck outta her 2018 edition.

http://bloodbathspodcast.blogspot.com/

Gross Movie Reviews #457

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Gross Movie Reviews #457

 

The Snow Creature (DVD) – An unusual Yeti film about a botanist Dr. Frank Parrish who heads to the Himalaya Mountains to study plants with another scientist. When their guide’s wife gets kidnapped by the legendary creature Dr. Parrish becomes trapped in the mountains because his guide and others go searching for the Yeti. Along the way Parrish is able to help capture the creature and convince authorities to send it to L.A. for the find of the century. But the creature escapes into the night and goes on murder spree. It is unusual in the fact that there is more to this movie than just finding the Yeti and it’s not all spent in the mountains. Well worth the watch for Bigfoot film enthusiasts as I give the film 2 ½ stars.

 

Venom (On Demand) – Well thank you for being a pleasant surprise instead of the pile of garbage a lot of people were claiming? Instead of using the original source material of ‘Black costume Spider-man’ this story seems to lean more to the ‘Venom: Lethal Protector’ series superhero aspect. I am sure there will be some comic book geeks out there to correct me but that is how I seen this film. I believe two things made this film very entertaining: first, no connection to the Spider-man series… yet and second, Tom Hardy was enjoyable as Eddie Brock. Eddie is a journalist first and when he is sent in to interview Carlton Drake and asks the wrong questions Brock uses his job, girlfriend, and apartment. Six months later a scientist from inside visits Eddie to explain Eddie was right about Drake and his experiments and space exploration. So Eddie breaks in to get more evidence but instead finds a symbiote that changes everything. Drake worried it will be loose in the world and Eddie will blow the lid off of everything tries to kill him any chance available. But as time goes on and the two bond they both understand they can only help each other if they are going to escape Drake and save the Earth from certain doom. I give this entertaining flick 3 stars.

 

The House with a Clock in its Walls (On Demand) – Another unexpected fun film that has Eli Roth directing and Jack Black starring about an orphan named Lewis who is sent to live with his crazy uncle. Uncle Jonathan just happens to be a warlock with help from a neighbor is looking for a secret clock in the walls by his good friend Isaac. Isaac went to war and came back with the help of black magic and conjured something very evil. Now the uncle and the neighbor must find the clock as it is counting down to something. Lewis slowly is learning to be a boy witch/warlock but accidentally brings back good old Isaac from the dead who wants to restart everything? I give this magic filled flick 3 stars.

 

King Cohen: The Wild World of Filmmaker Larry Cohen (DVD) – A wild documentary that takes a long look into the career of a filmmaker that spawned many careers and has made many fun inspiring films. We all know about Roger Corman and his impact but Cohen may have been the second generation of being a maverick in filmmaking as he put his own twist on things. Cohen as a writer, producer, and director has had an impact of filmmaking whether people admit it or not. A great watch as many of Cohen’s peers tells some hilarious stories including Fred Williamson which pay attention what is being said between the two as I give this documentary 4 stars.

 

Dead Trigger (DVD) – A mysterious viral outbreak turns hundreds of millions of people into zombies so the government produces a game called “Dead Trigger”. The government and Dolph Lundgren use this to find young people to join the armed forces in 2025 to go in to Terminal City where it all started. There is a possible cure there but the government has lost track of the first team they sent in. So these kids with Lundgren’s help head in to save the day. I really liked the concept of the movie but it failed horribly as it tries too hard to reinvent the zombie film instead of adding to it. I give it 2 stars.

 

Snake Outta Compton (DVD) – Holy crap this is crap! A young rap group is trying to gear up their possible record deal tomorrow until their nerdy roommate brings inside a snake that fell from the sky. The nerdy roommate experiments with the snake and mutates it and the snake reacts to rap music. Once it escapes it is up to the budding rap artists to track it down and kill it. If “Bigfoot vs. D.B. Cooper” didn’t make you hate me then watch this film and you will as I give it 1 star for its horrible jokes that kept me entertained enough to get through this SyFy Channel reject.

 

Cucuy: The Boogeyman (SyFy Channel/DVD) – A Mexican urban legend is conjured up to kidnap young people in a small town. It is a dirty creature that comes out at night looking for bad children that is a story to little kids to scare the shit out of them. He apparently snatches the kids and takes them to his cave to be eaten later. When some kids go missing recently the common thread is they were bullies until a curious girl and her sister get mixed up with the urban legend. They find out a missing girl’s parents conjured up the creature to help them get revenge. The kids must get in the creature’s sack in order to enter his realm and stop it. Some blood, cool creature, enjoyed the urban legend part as I give the film 3 stars.

 

Demon Lover Diary (YouTube) – Did you know the 70s film “Demon Lover” had a documentary? Nope! Neither did I people as it was released for a short time on VHS supposedly but was one of these things that were a myth. I have heard a few stories of this existing showing how not to make a film but basically shows Donald G. Jackson of “Rollerblade” and “Hell Comes to Frogtown” fame having troubles on his first low budget production. A couple of filmmakers drive from the east coast out to Michigan to help Donald Jackson on his project “Demon Lover”. You be the judge was the project doomed from the start? Or did the three people that headed out to Michigan to make this documentary help the chaos along? However you see this documentary it is an interesting peak inside of low budget filmmaking that could be used as a learning tool for new and old filmmakers out there as I give it 3 stars.

 

Ocular (DVD) – An absolute bizarre short film from David Brudie that has an unknown individual eat a bloody poo sandwich, pop zits, eat bloody snot, then has a weird groping session with itself. I know the film is supposed to mean something but in my opinion comes off as let’s see how many random scenes of gross can I put in the short film and call it art? What’s not so weird is I believe there is an audience for it as I give it 2 stars for trying to be disgusting.

 

The Demons of Ludlow (VHS/YouTube) – A small town named after its founder 200 years ago ‘Ludlow’ is celebrating its 200th birthday. For the celebration an odd piano from Ludlow’s family collection has been returned to the town and strange things begin to happen. Apparently Ludlow wrote a list and cursed the town. A reporter Debra Hall comes through town is there to do a story on the celebration knows a little about the odd history of the town as her grandfather use to tell her stories. She investigates and cannot find any history on the town but the folks who have lived there all their lives believe it is the Ludlow demons? This haunted piano film is pretty dull at times but would be a wonderful pick for the new MST3K as I give it 2 stars.

 

Dead in the Water (SyFy Channel/DVD) – A boat full of activists trying to track down and stop a boat that was doing illegal ocean fishing breaks down. While they try to get engine working again and get moving before the major storm rolls in they believe they see something floating out on the ocean. The activists pull in a dead body that awakes and almost kills two of them. During an autopsy they believe he may have a contagion but something was living inside of him. Now that it is loose it attacks them one by one feeding on anything warm blooded. If you enjoy “The Thing” rip-offs this was bearable as I give it 2 stars.

 

Mysterious Island of Beautiful Women (DVD) – A B-flick from the late 70s about a nun and some orphans who escape from a war torn China on a plane. The plane goes down and the orphans are left to fend for themselves on an uncharted island. Twenty-five years later a small plane full of men sets down because they are lost and low on fuel. They quickly find out the island is populated by women. Wanting to keep the peace they try to speak with the women and possibly find help or fuel? They come to an agreement to help the women with the invading men from another nearby island. Not a whole lot goes on in the movie except for a few Miss Universe contestants wondering around in bikinis. I give it 1 star.

 

It Came from the Desert (DVD) – A low budget horror movie based on a video game I never heard of but didn’t stop me from trying to enjoy the mutant movie. Two brothers partying out in the desert find an abandoned military contractor building in the desert of New Mexico. They go exploring and find out there is giant ants infesting the building and now they are about to make their way above ground. The brothers after catching up with a scientist gain the knowledge that the military has been experimenting with alien DNA and ants since 1951. Now must stop them before it becomes a global catastrophe! One of those films you are surprised wasn’t made by Asylum Entertainment and showed up on SyFy Channel as I give it 2 stars.

Supergrid (On Demand) – The latest project from “Wolfcop” filmmaker himself Lowell Dean where the film is set in the not-to-distant future where ‘black lung’ has infected most of the population. The Campbell brothers are employed to ride into the ‘grid’ aka what is left of America to retrieve a mysterious package and bring it back to Canada. They must fight their way through cannibals and road gangs with no protection in order to complete their mission. Problem is once they have the package they learn what it is and do not want to hand it over once they make it back. Lots of good action scenes keep the low budget post-apocalyptic film going. For me it isn’t “Wolfcop” but it was cool seeing some of the cast and Lowell Dean doing something different as I give it 3 stars.

 

Alien Beach Party Massacre (VHS) – This ultra-low budget flick has aliens stealing a weapon called the ‘death-sphere’ which by the way looks like a volleyball. When some ugly aliens come to claim it back they send the death-sphere to Earth to hide it and crash land there. Now Lord Odem is pissed and must go to Earth to retrieve it and vaporize anyone that gets in his way. The most hilarious part of the film is half of it takes place in a supposedly haunted mansion where the beach bums all go to party with the death-sphere. The movie has its dull moments but kudos for it being a one of a kind horror/comedy as I give it 2 stars.

Hellfest (On Demand) – A slasher flick where the unknown killer uses a Halloween themed amusement park as his back drop to stalk and kill people. Six college kids head inside for booze and scares and instead deal with a person that wants them dead. The plot is simple but interesting as I like the little things about the film as it is set in reality more than your usual “out at the cabin by the lake”. In a nutshell that is the movie. “Hellfest” has a good amount of gore and the killer doesn’t seem to have a real motive other than what you see at the end of the film. The horror film is by no means one of the best of 2018 but I did enjoy it for trying to be a little different and thank you for Tony Todd! I give this well worth a watch horror film 3 stars.

 

Any comments or questions please send to grossmoviereview@verizon.net or www.facebook.com/grossmoviereviews . Remember folks always support your local independent movie theater, independent video store, and independent filmmakers! It will keep horror alive………

Don’t forget you can also hear Kyle Poling and me talking about horror flicks on a weekly basis on the Bloodbaths and Boomsticks podcast at: www.bloodbathspodcast.blogspot.com/ also available at http://www.stitcher.com/podcast/kyle-poling-2/bloodbaths-and-boomsticks?refid=stpr

Plus you can always go to the greatest T-shirt place online or if you are in Texas visit the store of “Fast Custom Shirts” where T-shirt Joe is the only place you should purchase your horror T-shirts: Go to www.fastcustomshirts.com for details.

Grossfest 2 is coming… July 20, 2019, check our Grossfest Facebook page and www.grossfest.com for details and upcoming guests. #grossfest #grossfest2019