Gross Movie Reviews #382

Posted on July 10, 2016 by grossmoviereviews

Gross Movie Reviews #382

Howling II: My Sister is a Werewolf (DVD) – The sequel to the original and highly successful ‘The Howling’ takes a complete left turn introducing a whole other idea of werewolves among us instead of just owning a small community in the mountains. The sequel goes for the jugular with it’s over the top chaos of introducing Sybil Danning as a head werewolf fulfilling a prophecy and Christopher Lee as a man of the occult. The film picks up from the end of the first film in the sense of Dee Wallace’s brother wants answers but also just wants to bury her and be done with it. But after Lee’s occult character shows him a video tape of her changing into a werewolf and going to her grave to silver in her heart he believes. They travel to Transylvania to fight the werewolves on their turf and we get fun 80s music, punks, werewolf orgies, Christopher Lee being Christopher Lee, werewolf vision, hilarious and fun B-movie stuff. The sequel does have its fans but also there is a few horror fans believe this sequel destroyed what could have been a very good series of movies. Right or wrong this film was fun when I was a teenager but doesn’t hold up as well as maybe part five or six in the series? I give this flick 2 ½ stars.

Howling V: The Rebirth (DVD) – This sequel is easily one of my favorite ‘Howling’ films. Being released direct-to-video in 1989 where horror sequels were still being churned out almost daily trying to cash-in. The ‘Howling’ series is a werewolf series that clearly suffers from lack of direction like the ‘Hellraiser’ series later on after it. I believe this film was actually some random werewolf film that got the title change when someone figured that the series could use a change as the three sequels before it sent horror fans screaming far away from the series. But anyway the film is a classic “Who dun it?” or this case “Who is the werewolf?” The film begins in 1849 Budapest, where a group of people are in a bloody heap around a dinner table inside a huge castle. Before you ask, no it wasn’t Charles Band’s castle… But anyway people have been slayed in the name of god to stop the werewolf curse. Problem a baby survives! Present time, 1989, a group of people have been invited to an opening of the castle that hasn’t been open since the slaughter of 1849. With little information given the group speculates on why or how they got the invite and what is the story behind the castle and its history. A snowstorm moves in and one by one the invitees disappear being killed by a werewolf. The film could have used a little more gore but I totally believe it still holds up many years later as one of the best sequels of the series. Everybody forgets there is seven films in the series plus a forgettable “Twilightish” reboot. So if you are looking for a good werewolf film no one talks about this would be a good place to start my friends as I give the film 3 ½ stars.

Howling VI: Freaks (DVD) – Two years after ‘The Rebirth’ we got another direct-to-video sequel in the series that seem to have less of a budget but another intriguing storyline. This one involves a Freak show run by Harker (Bruce Payne) who he and companions roll through the small dying town Canton Bluff. Meanwhile a British drifter named Ian rolls through town looking for work but is secretive about why he is really there. Harker finds out about Ian’s secret (a werewolf) and uses a spell to make him transform when he wants aka for the show. Harker captures Ian in attempt to use him but turns the town against him after Ian escapes but little the town knows is that Harker is a vampire. Again another fun entry into the series that doesn’t get talked about much but also like ‘Puppet Master’ or ‘Hellraiser’ doesn’t connect it to other sequels in the series. I give the werewolf sequel 3 stars.

I Love Lucy (YouTube) – A normal looking short film idea about a girl named Lucy who is going to the Valentine’s dance with her perfect boyfriend Rex. Lucy’s girlfriends seem to be pressuring her into thinking its “time” and she will enjoy “it” but Lucy hesitates. Lucy even feels pressure from the school principal. But once home and Lucy and her boyfriend are alone in her bedroom that is when the short film gets truly weird and bizarre and I enjoyed it! The short film is from Zach Lorkiewicz and I always love seeing truly cool stuff like this from unknown filmmakers. Want more info or see a trailer check out: www.facebook.com/counttheclock and www.counttheclock.com as I give the short film 3 ½ out of 4 stars.

Return to Salem’s Lot (DVD) – A sequel to Stephen King’s TV movie from the late 70s truly came out of left field in the late 80s but was a staple of late night cable television. Michael Moriarity stars as Joe who is in the Amazon taking video of a tribe that has never been seen before. The tribe is chased off by the locals only to tell Joe he needs to get back to the states for his son. His ex-wife cannot control him any longer so Joe decides it’s time for him and his kid to head to Maine where his aunt left him some property. Maybe there they can get closer and know each other again. But as they enter the town of ‘Salem’s Lot’ they know it’s not your normal town as not many people around during the day. They shortly learn the town is full of vampires and the judge wants Joe to write the town’s bible/history to share with the world in maybe a hundred years or so. Especially since the vamps came over on the Mayflower! Once Joe understands this is wrong and the judge is trying to take his boy and teams up with an old dude who knows the judge from years ago. They go house to house burning down ‘Salem’s Lot’ so they can escape. The effects are a little cheesy, it has nothing to do with the original, but it has Michael Moriarity and makes a great double bill with ‘Sundown’. I’m always in when it comes to these oddball 80s sequels as I give it 3 stars.

The Divine Enforcer (VHS/DVD-R) – Oh yeah mother fuckers a cast of Jan-Michael Vincent, Eric Estrada, Jim Brown, Robert Z’Dar, Judy Landers, and Scott Shaw (Rollerblade Warriors: Taken by Force fame) show up in this 1992 direct-to-video B-flick about a priest taking the law into his own hands. Father Daniels shows up at his new parish that happens to be in a rough neighborhood. But he can only take so many horrible confessions from horrible individuals. Father Daniels takes down the local mob, strip clubs, but the one he is having trouble with is the serial killer “Vampire of Los Angeles”. With the help from a woman who has ‘the gift of sight’ Father Daniels eventually tracks down this murderous evil. Also pay attention to the last scene of the film, hilarious crap folks as I give this B-movie gift 2 ½ stars.

The Killer Elite (DVD) – Not knowing the Statham and DeNiro film was a remake of this 1975 flick it made me want to track down a copy and check it out. The film stars James Cann and Robert Duvall as two agents from a secret part of the government who do things the military or the regular government cannot. Well Duvall’s character wants more money and decides to shoot Cann in the arm and knee to retire him. A year or so later after rehab, Cann has a new life but is approached by his old boss about a job that could help him get revenge. Good flick but for me not as much fun as the remake which surprised me a little as I give this 70s action flick 2 stars.

Hard Target (DVD) – A John Woo film produced by Sam Raimi that stars Jean-Claude Van Damme, Lance Henriksen, Arnold Vosloo, Yancy Butler, and Wilford Brimley… Brilliant! Set in New Orleans where Lance Henriksen plays a bad villain who sets up human hunts for rich people. When Butler’s character comes along looking for her homeless father she screws up the perfect hunt and its all-out war on Jean-Claude’s character ‘Chance’. A great 90s action flick worth revisiting just for JCVD’s glorious mullet! I give the film 3 stars for the mere reason they figured out how to push in two bad ass dudes (Henriksen and Vosloo) into one action flick.

Cell (Theater) – The film based on a more recent Stephen King story that involves cell phones. After the book was released in the early 2000s there was a frenzy of companies trying to buy the rights for the film adaption. After a lot of scuttlebutt of Eli Roth being attached in the early stages of the film the project went quiet for a few years. Then John Cusack got a hold of the project and the ball was rolling again and finally made. Cusack is Clay, a man who gets off a plane and wants to see his son and celebrate with his great news. But his cell phone battery dies. He tries to call on a pay phone but notices people begin going nuts killing each other, eating each other, smashing their heads off of pillars; planes crashing… you get the picture. End of the world kinda stuff folks! Clay and Samuel Jackson’s character meet up on a subway car and leave to go to Clay’s apartment to decide on what they should do next? Clay wants to get back to his son up north believing he is still alive and as long as they don’t listen to their phones signal they won’t turn into mindless zombies of sorts. The film is shorter than I thought it would be but still interesting like the book. My only issue with the film is the ending as in the book it just kinda ends where the film tries to give a twist that doesn’t make much sense. But like most of Stephen King’s works he has trouble ending stuff as many horror fans would agree. Is this the perfect version of the film I wanted for the book, “No”. But I still really enjoyed this horror flick for the mere fact the signal isn’t really explained and this easily can happen these days. I give the film 3 stars and sit back and let all the other film geeks argue over the movie as like most horror films I enjoyed it for what it is.

Monster from the Surf (DVD) – A groovy mid-60s film where some beach bums grooving to some surf music, surfing, and partying get attacked by a sea creature. The main suspect just happens to be a crippled dude named Mark that lives down the beach since the cops don’t believe in a sea creature? A film that should be only watched at the old school drive-ins. But well worth checking out when revisiting the old 50s and 60s creature/monster flicks as I give it 2 stars.

She (DVD) – Some years after a nuclear war a goddess rules over women and her name is ‘She’. ‘She’ is played by the cool actress Sandhal Bergman who comes in contact with two men who are in search for the one’s sister who was captured by a tribe called ‘The Norks’. ‘She’ allows the men to stay alive helps them search for Tom’s sister but along the way must fight mutants, vampires, a warlock, and eventually ‘The Norks’. ‘The Norks’ look like extras from the film ‘The Warriors’ but great villains for this fantasy/apocalyptic film. What’s weird about the film was it was finished in 1982 but not released in the U.S. until late 1985. It got a release in several countries during that three year period with the U.S. being last. I give this weird fantasy film 2 stars.

I Survived a Zombie Holocaust (DVD) – Another fun oddity from New Zealand where a zombie outbreak happens during filming of a low budget zombie film ‘Tonight They Come’. But it all centers on Wes. It is Wes’s first day on the job as he just graduated film school and has big expectations. Wes quickly learns there are a lot of bitter people behind the scenes of making this flick but Wes also soon learns there is such thing as real zombies. Soon the real zombies begin to feast on cast and crew and all Wes can do is try to survive the onslaught of horror as long as the crew doesn’t kill him first? My favorite scene has to be the special effects guy shoots himself in the face when he jumps out to fight the zombies head on. This is after he begins shooting real people and not the zombies. Horror films from New Zealand never get old as I give this treat 3 stars.

The Darkness (On Demand) – Kevin Bacon and his family go on a camping trip to the Grand Canyon only for their autistic son to find an ancient place in the mountains by accident. He picks up these ancient stones and takes them home. These ancient stones when removed from their resting place can open a doorway to something called, ‘The Darkness’. They are demons that live in the shadows and can drive people mad until they die or just steal their souls. Either way you are screwed if you have opened up the doorway. The autistic kid uses the stones every day and talks to his new friend Jenny. Soon his room is fire, a snake attacks grandma, a dog attacks his sister, mom starts drinking again, some weird hokey shit is going down people. In the end I see the film as Poltergeist-lite with an autistic child. Good cast, the film doesn’t insult you like some paranormal films, it will find its audience as I give it 2 ½ stars.

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Gross Movie Reviews #381

Posted on June 27, 2016 by grossmoviereviews

Gross Movie Reviews #381

Mummy Sleepover Massacre (DVD) – Where has this horrible greatness been hiding at? Well first off it was written, edited, and directed by the one and only Henrique Couto… when he was like 15! Within minutes of me posting of this film being in my possession, Henrique wanted to know how I got it. Second off, with a title like this you knew this movie would find its way to me just because. It has been long out of print but that didn’t stop me from enjoying the horrible glory of a toilet paper covered mummy murdering teenagers at a slumber party. There isn’t a whole lot to say about it besides that. Is it bad… yes? Did I enjoy this gem from an unknown filmmaker (2003) at the time who is a big deal now… Hell yeah!!! Henrique understand this film has found its rightful place in my movie collection where it belongs as I give it 1 ½ out of 4 stars. But it is one the best god damn 1 ½ star movies ever just for the title and the toilet paper mummy! And Henrique, thank you.

The Conjuring 2 (Theater) – After the events of the first film the Warrens find themselves investigating the famous home in Amityville in 1976. During a séance Lorraine finds herself defending herself against an evil she has never experienced before but not a part of the famous Amityville house. Once home she makes Ed promise her they take a break because she has seen his death. But this evil spirit takes residence in a single mom of four’s house in London 1977. The Warrens are called in by the church just to observe for three days. When they arrive one child is completely terrorized and the other three kids and mom scared for their lives with no one to turn too. After video proof that it was faked or supposedly fake, the Warrens rush back to the home to help the family from this beyond evil spirit that refuses to go away. Amazing flick again horror fans. I am not much into paranormal movies but the two ‘Conjuring’ flicks I have absolutely loved and glad they exist. I give the sequel 4 stars and forgive them for even thinking ‘Annabelle’ was a good idea. Wait a minute… there may be a sequel to ‘Annabelle’? Don’t fuck with the formula based on true stories Hollywood! Just sayin…

Swamp Thing the Series: Volume Two (DVD) – This box set covers half of the third season as the third season had something like 50 episodes. Crazy, but what is really weird I must start my quest looking for this other box set as it seems to unavailable everywhere? But anyway after ignoring for a full season that Arcane sent a kid to South America news comes that Jim is alive sending his mom on many trips to South America looking for him. Sadly no help from Swamp Thing but that doesn’t stop Alec Holland from getting a new love interest that during an episode Mr. Swamp Thing eats rare lizard eggs that gets him high and dream about his new girl. They do kill off Kari Wuhrer’s character quickly and have a few episodes where Swamp Thing and Arcane must help out each other. Overall its cheesy television but worth checking out if it pops up on Netflix, On Demand, Hulu, etc., as I give it 2 ½ stars.

Survivors (DVD/Vimeo) – Those filmmakers in the UK refuse to let the zombie genre go away as this latest entry into the genre takes a dramatic and political take on it. Medea is a medical testing joint that is funded by the government and recently some human patients have gone missing. With little to go on Kate and her cameraman Duke try to get the inside scoop on what is going on and see if the rumors are true about a new secret weapon, “Zombies”. While investigating the experiments have worked and the patients have escaped causing a shitload of chaos in the world. From here the film focuses on Kate before and after the chaos flipping back and forth. After Duke takes off looking for help Kate continues on trying to survive only to meet Paul, who just so happens to be sent by the government to find out what actually does Kate know? The film is a dramatic, classic, smart take on an overloaded zombie genre which for me never gets old as I give the film 2 ½ out of 4 stars. The film has the suspense of another recent zombie movie I liked called, ‘State of Emergency’. For more on this film check out: www.continuummotionpictures.com and www.mctvnetwork.com .

Just Desserts: The Making of Creepshow (Blu-ray) – A Michael Felsher project that took a life of its own as it went from a special feature to a full-length documentary that can only be explained as an orgasmic explosion of amazingness about the legendary film ‘Creepshow’. The documentary covers everything of how it began to Tom Savini thinking it was Halloween for five months straight while being on set to make all sorts of creatures for the anthology. The film is almost timeless and has one of my favorite stories of horror in the segment called ‘The Crate’. The documentary has some great interviews with George Romero, Savini, Ed Harris and so on but also great stories about Stephen King and him being a kid at heart. The Blu-ray also has ‘Scream Greats’ Tom Savini video which was watched by many horror fans who grew up in the 80s but now has a commentary as well with Savini looking back at the video. This Blu-ray is a true nerd out of a disc as it has everything you could ever imagine about ‘Creepshow’ and for that I say thank you to Mr. Felsher as I give the Blu-ray 4 out of 4 stars but also it will be one of the best horror discs of 2016! Place your order now at www.synapse-films.com .

Blood Glacier (DVD) – A German horror film about a Climate Research Center high in the mountains and its occupants finding a strange blood red covered mountain one day and gone the next. But after a dog is bitten or prodded strange noises are heard and they get back to home base to examine the samples. The samples are no good or so they thought so they rush back up there the next day and it’s gone. Strange things are happening to the world since the glaciers are melting and this can be one of them where animals and bugs mutate then attack humans. It boils down to the German version of ‘The Thing’. It’s hard not to make the comparison but don’t let that stop you from enjoying this lesser known creature feature as I give it 3 stars.

Batman: The Dark Knight Returns Part 1 & 2 (DVD) – The 2012 animated feature stars the voice of Peter Weller as Batman where Batman is now 70 and been out of the spotlight for ten years. But since his disappearance Gotham has gotten worse from a whole new slew of criminals called “The Mutants”. Bruce Wayne tired of retirement and Commissioner Gordon about to retire decides it is time for Batman to return and restore order in Gotham. But this isn’t your Saturday morning Batman cartoon folks as not only does Batman kill some people or criminals, but “The Joker” does also during his return to society. Pretty violent and the story of how Batman fakes his death so he can continue teaching young people to take care of Gotham from the shadows. I give the flick 3 stars.

You can always visit and see some past reviews, independent film news, or me ranting at: www.grossmoviereviews.com !!!

Don’t forget you can also hear Kyle Poling and me talking about horror flicks on a weekly basis on the Bloodbaths and Boomsticks podcast at: www.bloodbathspodcast.blogspot.com/

Gross Movie Reviews #380

Posted on June 14, 2016 by grossmoviereviews

Gross Movie Reviews #380

Howl (DVD) – In the middle of Somewhere, UK, passengers are taking a train at night to get to their destination. Problem… train breaks down in the middle of highly wooded area that we later find out has a history of weird shit happening but never substantiated? But driver gets out checking out the problem only to be attacked by something. Two train workers check it out not finding the driver and debating with the several passengers on what they should do. Finally they leave the train only to find the remains of the driver and now something is chasing them back to the train. They are forced to defend themselves as this wolf man like creature is attacking the train trying to eat everyone inside! A fun werewolf flick with lots of blood and guts and I give it 3 stars.

Jaws of Satan (DVD) – An early 80s killer animal flick that involves a King Cobra escaping from a train and causing other snakes in the area to attack humans. All because the King Cobra is Satan himself according to the local priest! A possessed snake holding a community hostage is great stuff horror fans and a must watch as I give it 3 stars!

The Vatican Tapes (DVD) – A woman named Angela becomes possessed on her 25^th birthday and the church gets involved. A special division of the Vatican gets involved after investigating the supposedly possession and tries exorcise the demon from the young woman’s body before it completely takes control. A little more interesting than most of the PG-13 possession films that have flooded the horror genre as I give the film 2 ½ stars.

Amityville Death House (DVD) – The story begins with Eric Roberts doing voiceover telling a story about a witch using the ‘Book of the Dead’ as a means to enter present day. Pay attention as you will notice the ‘Book of the Dead’ is: A) The Evil Dead DVD Necronomicon and B) its upside down. Anyway, present day and Tiffany and college friends are stopping by to visit grandma. Well grandma lives in the old Wilmont’s house that was the house to Abigail the witch during the 1800s. Locals always believed witches lived in the home for years. Now the home is shunned by the community even though Grandma Raymond lives there. Tiffany use to spend her summers there until grandpa died and since then hasn’t been back. But now she is back and weird shit begins to happen and six people need to die for Abigail the witch to come into present day. And only in a Polonia Brothers film you would hear the line, “You look like you had a dozen tits?” It’s true if you watch the film she did look like that… Tiffany I mean. Make-up effects from Brett Piper and Anthony Polonia, Fred Olen Ray as an executive producer and Eric Roberts involved with a great looking poster comes off as a slight misfire than classic. I expected more but hey it does have Amityville in the title so I give it 2 stars.

Flesh for the Inferno (DVD) – A film written by the legendary Michael Varrati begins March 11, 1999, at St. Christopher Middle School. A priest has raped a boy and the boy told four nuns about it. They choose to confront the priest and things go bad and next thing you know they are renouncing god as they are bricked up in the basement. Years later… June 2, 2015, a youth group and its leader show up to clean and fix up the old school for the weekend but they are warned it’s a bad day according to the caretaker. Once the cleaning begins the nuns return causing death and chaos inside the walls of this holy place. Gore, ugly nuns, and a little reminder for me at least of ‘The Unholy’ and ‘The Convent’. A fun and gritty low budget horror movie worth seeking out fans as I quite enjoyed it as I give it 3 out of 4 stars. This is the type of horror film I believe needs to make a comeback to the cinemas?

Black Sabbath (DVD) – Boris Karloff tells tales of terror in this early 60s horror film that even has Karloff playing a vampire in the last tale of terror. Think of Karloff as the early Cryptkeeper. Found this flick a little dull at times but sure there are some older people that would tell me to fuck off just for saying that as I give this film 2 stars.

Swamp Thing: The Series Volume One (DVD) – Yes folks, I am the weirdo that owns this box set but this set actually contains season one and two. The third season for unknown reasons right now is 50 some episodes! It was USA network in the early 90s before they knew what programs were being placed on the channel. Dick Durock returns as the big green guy who pretty much saves a kid named Jim for several episodes before he is shipped off to South America and now has to deal with his older brother Will. The series centers on the struggle between Dr. Arcane and Swamp Thing and the surrounding swamp land. With each story being wrapped up in 23 minutes and everyone including his mom forgetting Jim from the first season was shipped to South America by Arcane. An odd and quirky take on the cult comic book hero but no worse than the ‘Friday the 13^th Series’ that was about cursed objects not Jason Voorhees. I look forward tracking down the rest of the episodes but until then hopefully we can get a movie or TV series that gives this interesting character some respect? I give it 2 stars.

Werewolves in Heat (DVD) – Lance Polland and company make a movie that seemed to be a lost film from the early 90s Troma catalog that even includes Ron Jeremy as a pimp named ‘Chancho’. The story centers around three friends leaving the friendly confines of L.A. for the sex, drugs, and party of the desert. Once at their rental house they proceed to the local bar to place flyers for their party and buy some whores. But these just any whores… Let’s remember Ron Jeremy aka Chancho is pimping out the best ever. The three friends are so excited for the women and their party doesn’t know until it is too late when the women/werewolves show up and start a bloodbath once horny! Everyone may get laid but it all ends in death as these women have embraced being werewolves. Hell, we even get werewolf vision which reminds me a lot of the same thing in ‘Howling 7: New Moon Rising’ (a sub-par sequel in the series). Mr. Polland accomplished in giving horror and Troma fans a low budget raunchy gem that makes you reminisce about old school Troma films? I give the flick 3 out of 4 stars. More about the film can be found at: www.facebook.com/werewolvesinheat .

You can always visit and see some past reviews, independent film news, or me ranting at: www.grossmoviereviews.com !!!

Don’t forget you can also hear Kyle Poling and me talking about horror flicks on a weekly basis on the Bloodbaths and Boomsticks podcast at: www.bloodbathspodcast.blogspot.com/

Gross Movie Reviews #379

Posted on June 4, 2016 by grossmoviereviews

Gross Movie Reviews #379

Sorceress (Blu-ray) – Wynorski fans will be so happy to find out that finally the uncensored version of this film has been released to Blu-ray. A project that had Wynorski fans talking for years on whether there was an actual uncensored version or not and had them scouring the conventions for the uncensored release. But it’s here kids in all its uncensored beautiful, crisp, clean glory and has two entertaining commentaries. But more on that later… And for those who do not know the title of this Wynorski/Fred Olen Ray joint, it was also under the title ‘Temptress’ which has a sequel. The film stars Linda Blair and Julie Strain as witches. Strain’s character Erica will stop at nothing to help her husband Larry moves up the corporate ladder. So of course she gets naked and turns to witchcraft. Fucks up Amelia’s (Linda Blair) husband but Erica’s husband is not happy and Erica falls to her death! Pissed off, Amelia turns to witchcraft for revenge. It all ends with the ‘Wisdom’ ending. (A mid-80s film I blame for starting a chain reaction in low and big budget films where in the end nothing happened. Look it up it stars Emilio Estevez and Demi Moore.) The film is okay but the main course or reason you need this for your collection isn’t the movie itself but possibly one of my favorite commentaries of all-time is on this new disc. The first commentary is Jim Wynorski but the second commentary is Wynorski and special effects guru Tom Savini. Within five minutes the commentary derails into a comedy of Wynorski forgetting about what’s going on screen and trying to answer Savini’s questions which are absolutely hilarious. A few of Savini’s questions and comments: Is Julie Strain a man? He questions today’s porn and compares it to Wynorski’s films. He admits not owning a Wynorski film. Questions if there was ever a plot to the film? Witches don’t make any money. And now Wynorski and Savini will be making a film called, “Blummy”! Kids, this commentary alone makes this Blu-ray well worth being in your collection. I give the film 2 out of 4 stars but the commentaries and package 4 out of 4 stars as Synapse Films is brilliant for putting this together. You can purchase the Blu-ray at www.synapse-films.com .

X-men: Apocalypse (Theater) – The last film had me so excited what the future holds for the franchise and they did not disappoint. Now that they have rebooted, refigured with a younger cast it allows the filmmakers to really get into some geeky fun stories of the X-men universe! This time around the original mutant named ‘Apocalypse’ has awakened and needs his four horsemen to take control back from the humans. He was the original and wants Professor X to add to his mass of mutant powers that he has absorbed over the years. Just like ‘Captain America: Civil War’ everyone gets equal amount of time except Logan or should I say “Weapon X” but has a memorable scene to push forth another later storyline. Fun summer movie stuff as I give the flick 3 ½ stars. Bring me the X-23 film damn it!

The Unborn (DVD) – There is several films with this title but this film is from 1991 that was under the Roger Corman wing. Brooke Adams plays a woman who is having trouble getting pregnant and goes see James Karen because he has the reputation of helping women getting pregnant. But of course it’s James Karen and he is evil and oh yeah he just happens to be experimenting with the unborn babies trying to make them better. Everything goes well at first as Adams character sees other expecting mothers who went to the same clinic but shit hits the fan when the mothers begin to change and kill their spouses/girlfriends and the babies want blood! A fun movie to show to people who are about to have a kid as I give it 2 ½ stars.

The Unborn II (DVD) – The sequel came out three years later direct-to-video again from the Roger Corman wing where a woman is tracking down the babies that were started at the clinic from the first film. She knows they are evil and fucked up and the film gets rolling quickly as she shoots a kid in a playground. The film becomes a little boring at times but nothing like a crazy woman tracking down kids and killing them even if it means killing them in the hospital bed after just being born! Lots of blood splatters kids as I give the film 2 stars.

Killer Elite (DVD) – Based on a true story during 1980/1981 where a special ops guy (Jason Statham) gets out of the business until a year later his mentor (Robert DeNiro) was taken hostage because of a high priced job. The reason is six million dollars and he try to run because it’s all about oil that some secret UK guys want but don’t want the public to know. So time for Statham to go kick ass on both sides and get his mentor back so he can retire again. I give the film 2 ½ stars.

Vampire Bats (DVD) – So some mutated bats have eaten everything in the bayou of Louisiana and now out to feast on the local population. Lucy Lawless plays a college biology professor who knows about bats and wants to capture a few so she can determine how and why they mutated before they feast on the whole community. When it comes to killer bat movies this movie is pretty generic and for the most part I can see why this film doesn’t pop up any horror website or channel’s radar as I give it 1 star.

Rock & Rule (DVD) – An animated film released in 1983 that failed miserably from lack of promotion and several other things that was made to be on par with ‘Heavy Metal’. But I believe its four years in the making maybe didn’t help it either but well worth searching out if you love animation and music being smashed together. The war has happened, all humans are gone, and out of the ashes mutants and animals have taken humans place on earth. Meanwhile an evil dude ‘Mok’ is the greatest music artist ever and he is looking for that “voice” to unlock a portal to another dimension. He finds in a singer named ‘Angel’ and steals her away from her band to bring a demon forth to kill everyone! Cheap Trick, Iggy Pop, Earth, Wind, and Fire are some of the bands on the soundtrack. Cool film to watch but not on the same level as ‘Heavy Metal’ for me at least as I give the picture 2 ½ stars.

Lady Death (DVD) – A 2004 animated movie to the cult comic book series about the daughter of Lucifer. Set in the 15^th century and Hope is pure at heart but does not know about her father until it’s too late when the locals show up to kill him in the name of god. When he shows his true self and escape they snatch her up to burn at the stake. When burning she says the prayer so her soul can be with her true love but instead is tortured in hell. She escapes into the realm of hell and learns she may be still pure of heart but is Lucifer’s daughter and has unimaginable powers that begin to change her and fill her with rage towards her father. She trains, gets big boobs, a big sword, two werewolf looking dogs, and an army and they attack Lucifer! Was never a fan of the comic book series and the movie itself wasn’t truly exciting but I am sure there is some fans out there that didn’t know an animated film existed as I give it 2 stars.

You can always visit and see some past reviews, independent film news, or me ranting at: www.grossmoviereviews.com !!!

Don’t forget you can also hear Kyle Poling and me talking about horror flicks on a weekly basis on the Bloodbaths and Boomsticks podcast at: www.bloodbathspodcast.blogspot.com/

Gross Movie Reviews #376

Posted on May 1, 2016 by grossmoviereviews

Gross Movie Reviews #376

Cowboys vs. Dinosaurs (DVD) – Sometimes you wonder why these types of movies exist? Simply two things: One as long as I am alive I will find them and two I believe someone is stealing my dreams while I sleep or the government is uploading crap from my mind. Yes folks, call Mulder and Scully I think I am an X-file! Anyway, Eric Roberts shows up for a paycheck as a drunk local and Vernon Wells shows up as a badass as usual where he is trying to keep a mine going and escape dinosaurs in this small town. Local boy comes back home to small town Montana to find things have changed and not for the better. A mine explosion happens and dinosaurs are running loose eating the locals but Vernon wells and the local sheriff I trying to keep a lid on the multi-million dollar mining operation. Eventually local boy gets back on a horse and saves everyone but not before you will notice that if you are an old dude in this flick you have a hot girlfriend that is 20 years younger than your character… I give it 1 ½ stars, honestly it has Vernon Wells!

Yongary, Monster from the Deep (DVD) – Love Godzilla, enjoy random giant lizard movies, well you may enjoy bootleg Godzilla in this 1967 Korean B-movie? A mysterious earthquake happens and next thing you know a horned giant lizard starts fucking shit up. It’s the 60s and most likely this played constantly at the drive-in as I give it 2 stars.

The Orphan (VHS/DVD-R) – A weird and relatively unknown horror/thriller that was made in 1977. But what was weird and interesting was the film wasn’t released until late 1979 and was actually titled ‘Friday the 13^th: The Orphan’? But some money changed hands and that was movie history as we all know the slasher genre was sent into overdrive! But the story revolves a young boy named David whose parents die so he must go live with his old Aunt Martha and oh by the way the film is set in the 1920s. David slowly goes nuts and begins praying to a stuffed Monkey in a shed and old Aunt Martha drives him into madness which gives the film a very dark ending. I give the film 2 stars.

Dark (Vimeo/DVD) – A new low budget flick from the writer and directors of such independent projects ‘Gut’ and ‘Phobia’ which I enjoyed immensely but also executive produced by Joe Dante so you got my attention. The film is set during a blackout in 2003 New York City where Whitney Able plays Kate aka bootleg version of Jennifer Jason Leigh which is always a good thing in my book. Kate is lost in life… She is not sure about her girlfriend, her life, and so on but then the blackout happens when her girlfriend goes out of town for the weekend. Kate is alone and decides to head to the bar to make some bad decisions. Soon she finds herself being followed and returns home only to darkness. This is where the story gets really weird because it raises the questions of did it happen, is she imagining it all, and did she even go to the bar? Her world unravels in this dramatic and beautiful world of weirdness I enjoyed. ‘Dark’ cannot be labeled a horror film as so much a thriller as you know you are getting something different from these guys involved with the project as they make projects that don’t fit into one genre. Think outside of the box in so many words as I give ‘Dark’ 3 out of 4 stars. Want to know about the film go check out: www.darkthefilm.com .

Future Hunters (VHS/YouTube) – Robert Patrick’s first flick from and 1986 and the Philippines where he (Slade) and his girlfriend are entrusted with the “Spear of Destiny” by a time traveling dude named Matthew. Matthew is from 2025 after the holocaust and believes this is the only way he can save his world and stop the holocaust from happening. So Matthew travels back in time to 1986 and meets Slade. But evil is coming and it’s in the form of Nazis and the Nazi version of Playboy Buddy Rose! The couple goes looking for Professor Hightower who is the key to helping them saving the world. But along the way they run into crazy kung fu people, amazon tribes on horseback, car chases, explosions, cave full of midgets, amazon women, and gators! After several ordeals Slade and his girlfriend make a deal with the sledgehammering midgets in the cave and find the rightful place for the “Spear of Destiny” and save the world. If it helps make this film any better it is from the same dude that gave us ‘Wheels of Fire’ as I give the flick 3 stars.

Sugar Hill (DVD) – A young lady named Sugar wants vengeance after her man is killed by gangsters who want his club. But she just isn’t down for any vengeance; she wants to get medieval on their gangster asses and recruits the likes of Baron Samedi or Baron Zombi if you are a yinzer like me. And Baron Samedi has zombies that are former slaves that died on their way to America. A fun 70s zombie flick you must add to your collection if you haven’t already as I give it 3 ½ stars.

Unearthed & Untold: The Path to Pet Sematary (DVD/Vimeo) – These days it seems a lot of documentaries are being made about horror films and such. Some deserve it? ‘Pet Sematary’ deserved it for sure for its impact on the horror genre. Honestly horror movie fans it was one of the better book to film adaptions of King’s. The Stephen King story that was brought to life by director Mary Lambert had a long journey and interesting one. The film came at the end of the “Slasher Era” and no studio wanted it to be made mainly because of the kid death in the story/script/movie. But with a strike looming at the time Mary Lambert and others took advantage of this and the rest was film history. The documentary takes a very in-depth look how it got from book to film but also how it’s one of King’s darkest books that scared him when he first wrote it. The filmmakers tracked down everyone that had anything to do with the film and they share stories of how the production got to Maine instead of California but what it meant to the small town Maine residents especially being a Stephen King movie. Plus the interview with all the cast members involved sharing their stories of on and off set makes this one the best and interesting horror documentaries of recent times. I believe it was crucial having Mako Hughes talk about his experience and what he actually remembers of the project to make this the perfect documentary for ‘Pet Sematary’ fans. The film did win “Best Documentary” at the Rhode Island International Horror Film Festival in 2014 which I know why and give it 4 out of 4 stars. For more info on the project and its upcoming release check out: Official Store: http://shop.terrorfilms.net/ , Official Trailer Link: https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=fnP7swXKQXo, Official Facebook Page: https://www.facebook.com/UnearthedandUntold, Terror Films Website: www.terrorfilms.net .

Voodoo Island (DVD) – A great late 50s b-horror film starring Boris Karloff as a man who debunks: ghosts, demons, and present day myths. He leads an expedition to a tropical island where a millionaire wants to build his best vacation hotel yet. But surveyors that were sent there before disappeared and the lone survivor is in a zombie like trance. Once there weird stuff begins to happen like food going bad, boat doesn’t work, and plants just happen to eat people! Fun stuff and it looks like old Boris Karloff had a lot fun with this project as I give it 3 stars.

You can always visit and see some past reviews, independent film news, or me ranting at: www.grossmoviereviews.com !!!

Don’t forget you can also hear Kyle Poling and me talking about horror flicks on a weekly basis on the Bloodbaths and Boomsticks podcast at: www.bloodbathspodcast.blogspot.com/

Reichsfuhrer SS is now available on Amazon!!!

Posted on April 23, 2016 by grossmoviereviews

http://www.amazon.com/Reichsfuhrer-SS-David-Stewart-III/dp/B01EKCXIGG

The Reichsfuhrer-SS Heinrich Himmler, Adolf Hitler’s most loyal henchman meets Erebus, the gatekeeper of Hell!

Review from (Gross Movie Reviews):

Reichsfuhrer SS (DVD/Vimeo) – The same independent filmmaker that gave us “Operation: Nazi Zombies” a few years back is back at again with another Nazi film that involves Heinrich Himmler on about a $25,000 budget. The film is about how Himmler became a murdering Nazi bastard and meets the gatekeeper of hell after his suicide in 1945. While with the gatekeeper of hell Himmler goes through his past of what started him on his incredible murderous path. The crew does an amazing job with costumes, use of locations, décor, and even the gatekeeper of hell. If I didn’t tell you the budget of this flick most viewers would guess that the budget would be more like $200, 000 or $300,000 because of how authentic things look. The crew, the actors, and filmmaker go all out in this bad ass entertaining film about Himmler getting what he deserved in the end. I love watching independent movies that pay attention to detail when it comes to pictures, flags, etc. when movies are set in a certain time period and they should be proud of this project. I give this flick 3 out of 4 stars and more about this new release can be found at: https://www.facebook.com/RFSSMovie?fref=ts .

Gross Movie Reviews #373

Posted on March 21, 2016 by grossmoviereviews

Gross Movie Reviews #373

By Tim Gross

President Wolfman (DVD) – The title alone is what reeled me into wanting to watch this gem of a horror flick. But when I opened it and started to read the sleeve and began watching the film to my amazement the project was entirely stock footage of public domain titles and major parts are from the 1973 film ‘The Werewolf of Washington’. This 1973 film stars Dean Stockwell who was the go between for Sam and Ziggy from the ‘Quantum Leap’ show. But anyway the film is edited footage with new voiceovers, music, etc. Amazing work from Mike Davis and crew to craft a horror movie about president John Wolfman who tries to spend more time with his son Bobby and is attacked by a diseased coyote on a camping trip! From there mysterious murders are happening in the nation’s capital and that is the least of their problems as the Chinese continue their takeover of America. At one point President Wolfman has surgery that turns him into a hippie but reverses to a werewolf again. John Wolfman is also being pushed by Congress to sell out to the Chinese as they all will own a skyscraper in New York City. A fun horror film and a truly amazing accomplishment in editing by all involved. There were several parts of the film that I could not stop laughing at as I give this fun creation 3 ½ out of 4 stars. You can find this and many other fine films at www.wildeyereleasing.com .

Lumberjack Man (DVD) – First, did you know there was still an “After Dark Horror Fest”? Second, this film truly points out there are some lame slasher film ideas out there… But that didn’t stop me from watching Michael Madsen try to play a doctor who runs to Big Timber Woods to warn teenagers and forest rangers of the demon that lurks in the woods! Apparently every thirty years since 1892 a demon appears in the woods and kills whoever with his pancakes? If that isn’t enough to entice you to watch it, how about the demon can be killed by maple syrup?! I swear I am not making this shit up these types of films just seem to find their way to me. But I did thoroughly enjoy a scene where a teenager is thrown against a tree and then bent into several uncomfortable positions. I give this mess of a horror film 1 ½ stars.

I Saw the Devil (DVD) – Byung-Hun Lee aka bad ass dude that has shown up in recent action films and takeover or over shadows the stars in the film plays a bad ass in this film. But this isn’t just any type of action/horror weirdo fucked up flick? No, no, no Mr. Lee plays a character whose pregnant wife is killed by some nasty serial killer and for revenge wants to capture the man an torture him. Then repeat, torture, and then repeat, until innocent bystanders are now being killed in the process. But it’s one man’s quest to make the murderer to feel his pain. One fucked up and amazing film as I could not look away waiting to see what would happen next. I give this fun family flick 4 stars.

House (DVD) – Michael Madsen and most of ‘The Devil’s Rejects’ cast fuck with two couples who just happen to be stuck at an old house off of a back road. The cast is great, the plotline is pretty good but sometimes no household Hollywood types give this type of horror movie a grittiness that is memorable for the long run? For me it comes off more like some of our favorite celebrities were collecting a paycheck instead of being a part of something really awesome… I give the film 2 stars but sorry folks no William Katt, Richard Moll, or Norm from ‘Cheers’.

America’s Deadliest Home Video (DVD) – Apparently for the first time in 25 years this S.O.V. film is available again. As described on the inner sleeve it is the first “found-footage film” and it stars Danny Bonaduce. Between the inner sleeve and the two commentaries on the disc it is full of crazy information about this very rare feature. The stories about its making are amazing and just made the viewing experience that much better as I sat down and watched Doug played by Danny Bonaduce film everything going on around him. Doug is obsessed with filming everything especially now his wife of two years is found cheating on him. So Doug decides to jump into the mini-van and travels the US to film stuff. He eventually comes across three criminals simply known as “The Clint Dryer Gang”. Doug finds the three and films them pushing a car off of a cliff. They notice Doug and they take him captive. Unsure of killing him or not, Clint comes up with the idea of Doug filming all their criminal activity. From there Doug slowly finds himself a part of the gang and being filmed trying to hold up a place until he is shot. As authorities close in they turn on each other in a bloody climax. Not a horror film but easily a S.O.V. collector’s dream for this to be available again. Great stuff, interesting concept for when it was made (early 90s), and so happy Camp Motion Pictures/Alternative Cinema makes a project like this available again. I give this rare gem 3 out of 4 stars and can be found at www.alternativecinema.com .

The Outing (DVD-R/You Tube/DVD) – A lesser talked about horror film released in 1987 that I remember watching as a teenager on Skinamax. What makes this an interesting horror film it may be the first killer genie slasher film? Also the film was once released under the title “The Lamp”. But no one is sure if that version has the extra twenty minutes that was originally cut from the film before it had a short run at the theaters. Anyway the film begins with a mysterious death in 1893, Galveston, Texas, then to present day. In present day (!986/1987) three so-called thieves break into a woman’s home and try to steal the lamp for money but never make it out the door. The three are murdered by an unseen force from the lamp. From there the lamp is sent to a museum in Houston, Texas. Where a dude that is studying it has a daughter who gets a little too hands on with the lamp and becomes possessed by the Jinn and next thing you know she and friends stay the night after a field trip. Bad move folks, as the Jinn have a field day of killing teenagers off in various odd scenarios. I give this lesser known genie horror film 2 ½ stars but at least you know ‘Wishmaster’ perfected this formula eventually in the 90s.

Pi Day Die Day (DVD/Vimeo) – Not all the holidays have been taken or obscure ones or wait not sure if this is an actual day to be celebrated? But for the movie sake and for me just enjoying another random independent slasher “Pi Day” exists. March 14^th to be exact and high school students that have a connection with a shy girl named Gabriele are being murdered by a mysterious killer. Never mind the principal played by Ari Lehman is unsure on how to help the student body because the pie eating contest on “Pi Day” has been canceled because of the murders. Meanwhile the popular girls can’t believe Gabriele has found a guy and shows up to their popular party where one person’s head explodes from the beer keg… Great inventive kill! The film has its good and bad moments but I got to congratulate Michael E. Cullen II for giving me another obscure holiday horror film. Now I am not sure if the rest of the horror movie watching world is weird like me and will accept this film like this but I say “Bravo!” I give the independent horror film 2 ½ out of 4 stars. Find out more at www.pidaydieday.com .

Zombiefied (DVD) – Finally I was able to sit down and watch the sequel to one of my favorite independent films ever ‘Death Metal Zombies’. No doubt Todd Jason Falcon Cook knew there had to be a sequel but it took him many years! It’s been 13 years since the outbreak of zombies that were reversed to human form after a cassette of a new song from ‘Living Corpse’ was played backwards. But Angel and Tommy still have nightmares and it all happens again as a mysterious person goes to the local metal club and throws in a CD called “Phase II” and all in the club become flesh eaters. Now it is once again up to Angel, Tommy, and friends to stop the zombies. Reverse them to human if possible and if not find out who this mysterious person in a Nixon mask is and how he is able to control the undead. Nowhere near as much fun as the 1995 flick ‘Death Metal Zombies’ but still has some cool zombie effects. Maybe too much time had passed between films, maybe the first just had that something special (chaos perhaps), but this sequel just doesn’t live up to the hilarious fun the original is and was as I give this flick 2 out of 4 stars. You can find out more about the film at www.zombiefiedmovie.com and www.facebook.com/zombiefiedmovie .

B-Documentary (DVD) – Nick Charles for his first film chose to do a documentary about “how to make a film”. In doing that Mr. Charles traveled to meet and interview celebrities Lloyd Kaufman, H.G. Lewis, Bill Johnson, Lisa Gaye, D.J. Calvitto, Patrick Madcox, and Nurse Hatchet. With this Nick Charles gets these fine people to tell stories of “how they got started”, “keys to success”, “how to make a movie”, along with several other subjects that includes “digital vs film”. The movie isn’t so much a documentary as much as a perfect instructional guide for movie fans and filmmakers alike to hear what’s it like to make a movie or act in one. They all have sound advice and varying opinions which makes this film not just a must see but a must own for any horror movie or independent movie fan out there. Nick Charles did an amazing job first time out in the filmmaking world and now has my attention in what he does next. I personally wish him good luck. I give this wonderful project 4 out of 4 stars and more about it and where to purchase it can be found at www.officialdungeonfilms.com .

Any comments or questions please send to: GrossMovieReview@verizon.net, GrossMovieReview@aol.com or www.facebook.com/grossmoviereviews . Remember folks always support your local independent movie theater, independent video store, and independent filmmakers! It will keep horror alive………

You can always visit and see some past reviews, independent film news, or me ranting at: www.grossmoviereviews.com !!!

Don’t forget you can also hear Kyle Poling and me talking about horror flicks on a weekly basis on the Bloodbaths and Boomsticks podcast at: www.bloodbathspodcast.blogspot.com/

Next up, you can come by the vendor table I will be at for a book, shirt, or a movie at Cinema Wasteland April 1, 2, 3^rd, 2016 in Strongsville, Ohio (for details: www.cinemawasteland.com) .

Gross Movie Reviews #372

Posted on March 12, 2016 by grossmoviereviews

Gross Movie Reviews #372

By Tim Gross

The Barbarians (DVD) – This 1987 fantasy film and everything you could want? Ruggero Deodato directing, Richard Lynch as your villain, Michael Berryman as The Dirtmaster who trains these twins to be warriors, and a George Eastman appearance! A traveling circus is attacked by an evil bastard (Richard Lynch) who decides to take the princess aka the woman named Canary and the twins traveling with the circus. The twins are separated and trained to be warriors. When the twins grow up they are played by popular 80s muscle bound duo: Peter and David Paul. The twins are forced to fight each other but overcome the battle and help each other out to escape and get revenge. There is also a dragon, looks horrible but still a shit load of fun! I give the flick 3 ½ stars.

Chemical Peel (DVD) – A bachelorette party in the woods goes horribly wrong when the women go to sleep and wake up to a horrible fog outside of their cabin and a dead baby in the cabin. Things break down from there as they learn through static TV and radio that a train derailed not too far away and spilled a chemical that reacted causing mass evacuation. With the fog seeping in and the ladies learning the hard way to not use water it becomes a horrifying outcome. Great stuff folks, women turning on each other, characters you will hate right off the bat, and some beautiful disgusting gooey effects. So see who survives as I give the horror flick 3 stars.

Night of the Creeps 2 (DVD) – First off this film has nothing to do with the classic we all know and love. But what is weird this film from 2006 is an independent film that I know as ‘Zombie Town’. So how did it get the name blame Germany as it was sold there as a sequel somehow? But what makes this title even weirder is that I viewed a screener of the film ‘Zombie Town’ from MTI video over a decade ago and it was different from the version called, ‘Night of the Creeps 2’. Some of the information is sketchy but could not find out who exactly made this decision to retitle, rerelease, or even recut the film. Bottom line: I remember liking it just as “Zombie Town” and even comparing it or getting its influence from ‘Night of the Creeps’ but now pissed it somehow was marketed as a sequel. If you like killer leeches that turn small town folk into zombies this is right up your alley. So try not to condemn this film for a title change that was most likely out of the filmmaker’s hands… I believe I give it 3 ½ stars a decade ago. So hope your mind just didn’t blow up knowing this exists?

Septic Man (DVD) – Same person that gave us ‘Monster Brawl’ gives us horror fans another weird tale of Canadian horror that stars Stephen McHattie (plays all-around creepy cool dudes), Julian Richards (best known as ‘Death’ on ‘Supernatural TV series’), and the great actress Molly Dunsworth (Hobo with a Shotgun). A town is being evacuated because sickness and disease is spreading through the town killing people but Jack chooses to stay behind. Jack is the ‘Septic Man’. He is offered a large sum of money to stay behind and solve the issue as he believes he knows why the water is contaminated? But Jack isn’t ready for what happens after he fixes the problem and that is being trapped in the contaminated waste of the dead that is being dumped by a weirdo killer and his 7 foot brother who is afraid of him. The problem is fixed and the people come back but Jack is still trapped and going insane! Great weirdo ‘Slime City’ kinda vibe horror film as I give it 3 ½ stars.

Poltergeist (DVD/remake) – I was on the ropes about this flick mainly because the trailers made it look like another ‘Paranormal Activity’ clone. But I finally gave the remake a shot and was very surprised of how much it did not stray away from the 1982 original film. I didn’t hate it, I didn’t like it… The film really doesn’t take any chances to separate itself from the original. There isn’t a whole lot to say as much of it is a clone. I see this film as a useless chore in viewing it. I give it 2 stars. Hell, most people will forget this like ‘The Evil Dead’ remake.

Final Girls (DVD) – The only bad thing I can say about this film was I wish I seen this sooner as this will be one of my favorite horror films I have watched in 2016. Anyway a college girl, Max, is trying to get over her mother’s death still three years later. Her best friend’s brother works at a theater that is celebrating the cult horror slashers ‘Camp Bloodbath 1 and 2’. Max’s mother was famous for starring in the original and Max is asked to come be a part of the festival. She does an accident happens which starts the theater into a full on raging fire. Max and her friends cut through the movie screen to escape and find themselves in 1986 ‘Camp Bloodbath’ movie world. The non-stop slashing, blood, laughs are non-stop as Max and friends try to figure out how to fend off the movie’s killer Billy long enough to get back to the real world! This horror film is 4 stars all the way. It’s a slasher fan’s wet dream of a horror movie!

Manson Family Vacation (DVD) – A film about two brothers who are complete opposites and the older brother is adopted. The older brother was an artist but now has sold everything to travel the US and go on a road trip with his brother to everything Manson related before he goes off into the desert for his next job. The younger brother keeps trying to look out for him but knows he cannot control what he does not understand. It’s not a comedy, it’s not horror, and I don’t know if you could classify it as a road trip movie? But I do know I would like my 90 minutes back that I wasted on watching it. I give it 1 star.

The Editor (DVD) – A lot of the same people that were involved with ‘Father’s Day’ and ‘Manborg’ have yet another oddity where it seems to be set in early 80s Italy where an editor Rey Ciso was famous at one point but had a horrible accident. The accident took away four of his fingers off of his right hand. Now, treated like shit he is a suspect on the latest film he is editing as the stars are dropping like flies in bloody Eye-talian fashion. It is a beautifully absurd horror film that is a must see like the other two projects I have mention earlier in the review. I give the film 3 stars.

Spring (DVD) – A young man named Evan watches his mother die and there are not many friends around so he decides it is time to take a trip far, far away. Evan goes to Italy to drink with a couple of dudes and he doesn’t know but travels with anyway until he meets a mysterious woman. Almost immediately falling in love with her Evan finds a place to stay and goes into town just to run into her have dinner, coffee, anything just to have a relationship. But the woman with the dark past blows Evan’s mind when after they have sex she wants him to go away, she is now pregnant, and just happens to be some kind of ancient creature that needs stem cells to possibly stop her transformation. To put it simply: A Lovecraftian love story. Love the wide and far shots as you can see the beauty of the country in a lot of the scenes. And enjoyed the dialogue that keeps the film moving along but in the end I kept waiting for something more to happen… I give the film 2 stars.

Mold (DVD) – Its 1984, somewhere in the middle of the Arizona desert and scientists are experimenting with mold. They have developed a new strain of mold spores for the military that can kill everything and they are putting on a classified show for a select few. Things go okay until the new deadly mold infects the congressman. The underground bunker soon has the deadly mold spores spreading throughout the place. The group only has one chance if they can get controller agent and that isn’t even a given since it is untested. The group also finds out they are never allowed to leave as they are part of a bigger experiment to see how well the new deadly mold works. Pretty cool concept for an independent horror film but what makes worth the watch is its unbelievable gooey and gruesome over the top splatter effects! Gallons of green goo, exploding body parts make this a must for all gorehounds! I give the goo busting horror film 3 stars.

White Phantom (VHS) – I knew I was in for a treat when the Vidmark logo came up on this 1987 ninja flick. The film begins with some camo ninjas stealing weapons grade plutonium for the Sakura family who are powerful in China. From there we go right to the nightclub scene where we are introduce to our hero the ugly American (Jay Roberts Jr.) checking out a hot dancer. Roberts’s character is a mysterious man of sorts as he likes whores and playing basketball with the local kids when he isn’t signing baseballs as Babe Ruth. When that isn’t going down he would like to know more about this hot dancer at the night club who is just trying to repay a debt by getting info from the Sakura family about the weapons grade plutonium. The dancer is eventually killed by a ninja which of course sets up winner takes all (plutonium min this case) good ninja vs. bad ninja. And Bo Svenson collects a paycheck. I give the ninja film 2 ½ stars.

The Asphyx (YouTube) – A scientist who finds a blotch in a photograph and believes it is a ghost or possible soul leaving the body. He becomes obsessed with this find and wants it. The scientist believes this could be the link to immortality? An early 70s movie that is a good pick for a rainy Saturday afternoon that has that Hammer film feel to it as I give it 2 ½ stars.

You can always visit and see some past reviews, independent film news, or me ranting at: www.grossmoviereviews.com !!!

Don’t forget you can also hear Kyle Poling and me talking about horror flicks on a weekly basis on the Bloodbaths and Boomsticks podcast at: www.bloodbathspodcast.blogspot.com/

Next up, you can come by the vendor table I will be at for a book, shirt, or a movie at Cinema Wasteland April 1, 2, 3^rd, 2016 in Strongsville, Ohio (for details: www.cinemawasteland.com) .

Gross Movie Reviews #371

Posted on February 21, 2016 by grossmoviereviews

Gross Movie Reviews #371

By Tim Gross

Passed the Door of Darkness (DVD) – Two detectives that are having trouble catching a serial killer that is always one step ahead. The older detective finds out he has a brain tumor and is blacking out. Eventually he comes to the realization that the killer is him. The film fails to try and hide who is the killer from the start and just about put me to sleep trying finish the film as I give it a ½ star.

Wer (DVD) – The film begins with a family hiking it out in the middle of rural France only to capture their vicious animal attack that killed the husband and kid and scarred the wife, Claire Porter. Immediately, local authorities bring in a very large hairy man that doesn’t talk much and lived with his mother nearby the attack. This gets the attention of an American Human Rights Lawyer, Kathrine, who has a practice there and wants to represent the very large hairy man, Talan. The local authorities disregard that only an animal could do the damage it did and this man Talan has a rare disease that affects his joints, bones, etc. So it seems like a slam dunk for the lawyer to get Talan off from this brutal murder. But tests keep coming up inconclusive; the police know more than they are saying and Kathrine and friends dig deeper into Talan and his family and find a history like no other. That’s when the movie gets even more interesting when Talan escapes and begins a city wide murder spree! A werewolf flick with a whole different spin on the werewolf legend in this American/French production that was shot in Romania. On top of that I loved the creature and blood effects in this entertaining and refreshing spin on the werewolf genre. I give the film 3 ½ stars.

Evil Bong 420 (DVD) – Who says, “You can go to the well too many times”? Apparently Charles Band ignores that phrase with this entry into the “Evil Bong” series. The film is a sequel of sorts to “Gingerdead Man vs. Evil Bong”, which the movie came inside a cereal box where the cereal tasted like a generic ‘Cookie Crisp’ in case you were not paying attention? Anyhow Sonny Davis’s character manages to break out of Eebee’s weed fog inside the bong reality and open up a topless bowling alley. Once, Charles Band makes sure all of the characters from both franchises made their appearances exception of Tommy Chong. Gingerdead Man makes his escape and Eebee is pissed as she comes back to take her revenge in capturing all who escaped. Thus setting up another sequel… I give it 1 star just for the mere reason I am still a fan of Charles Band, Sonny Davis, Robin Sydney, and David Decoteau made an appearance! Plus it doesn’t help the film come off as one long ad for Full Moon merch. Sorry Mr. Band you have a few websites for that.

Cyborg Cop III (DVD) – The film was originally called “Terminal Impact”. But honestly who is paying attention to that except for Jon Cross, maybe Ed Demko’s dad, and me? So Delta Tech builds cyborgs while a local news reporter is investigating this cyborg thing. She finds out about something she shouldn’t have and Delta Tech sends cyborgs after her. Lucky for her two lucky go happy bounty hunters happen to drive by and help her out. I give the flick 1 ½ stars.

Insane (Vimeo/DVD) – One of my favorite hard working independent filmmakers Massimilano Cerchi is back with his latest release, “Insane”. The film is about a hot young couple buy their dream home off the internet and pictures don’t do it justice. But of course the weird neighbor just happens to stroll by and tell the young couple they are pretty much “doomed” if they stay because of the history of the home. Michael’s girlfriend Sarah is completely pissed off and wants to know why the realtor didn’t tell them this before they bought it. Michael of course believes it isn’t a big deal until the weird neighbor begins telling Michael of the stories about the murders that happened there. Michael becomes obsessed and begins filming everything and documenting anything to find evidence of something possibly supernatural in his new home. But just like the weirdo neighbor says, “You might not like what you find?” The evil clown is a nice touch but Cerchi’s approach of stripping down the bloated paranormal genre with few characters, not a ton of dialogue, and allowing the scenes tell the story make this feature refreshing and fun. I’m still not a big paranormal film fan but it’s nice to see there are still some entertaining and creepy ideas from great filmmakers out there! I give the flick 3 out of 4 stars as you can find out more about the flick and Mr. Cerchi at: https://www.facebook.com/massimiliano.cerchi?fref=ts&ref=br_tf .

The Last Witch Hunter (DVD) – From the beginning this Vin Diesel flick could have been the next great horror film but internet geeks and word of mouth never allowed this movie to have a chance. Now saying that I am not saying this is one of the best movies out there I just believe anymore these days most movies don’t survive the harsh criticism of it before it is ever released. As I try to do if the movie exists I will give it a chance and that is what I did here. Vin Diesel plays a witch hunter who is not one by choice but becomes one after his family is murdered several hundreds of years ago and is guided by a man/priest given to him by the church. Michael Caine plays the latest who believes it is time to retire but wants to give Diesel’s character the full story of what the church is hiding. But he is killed, maybe? And Elijah Wood steps in to help or fuck shit up just to bring the original witch queen back from the dead. I wanted this movie to be so bad that I enjoyed it because of what I heard, example “Cursed” anyone? But it wasn’t… It’s not great but like I said, “it exists”. Maybe it would have been better without Vin Diesel as the ‘Last Witch Hunter’ and should have been a Rutger Hauer or Jeffery Combs? Who knows? But the point is at least watch the movie then decide if it’s as bad as a lot of people believe because I don’t as I give it 2 stars. This film just suffers from ‘never having a chance once thought went to paper’.

Appleseed: Alpha (DVD) – Another fun CG-animated sci-fi feature about a cyborg and his female partner just trying to make it in the wasteland and maybe save the world. The two are just trying to repay their debt to a shady guy who rules New York City. So when they go out the outskirts of the city to remove some unwanted cyborgs, they stumble across another cyborg and a girl who are traveling to complete a secret mission. The two unlikely couples decide to travel together but now have evil cyborgs and the shady dude from New York City trying to stop them from accomplishing their mission. These types of movies are fun stuff: “Resident Evil”, “Bio-Hunter”, etc. This is geeky, fun flick for someone like myself as I give it 2 ½ stars.

John Wick (DVD) – Keenau Reeves jumps feet first into the action genre about a man who just lost his wife and has a dog and a bad ass Ford Mustang. He gets the shit kicked out of him, his dog gets killed, and his classic car stolen by some dumb ass mob kid. When word gets around whose car the kid stole people begin to panic as John Wick used to be a hitman that was flawless and stopped at nothing to kill all he was suppose too. From there the bullets fly and John Wick kicks ass. Even though I enjoyed the film two things bothered me as I watched it and maybe I am just a product of the 80s (Rutger Hauer, Arnold, Sly, Dolph, even a Jason Statham) but it seemed like Keenau just didn’t fit the role. Also I felt they built up the John Wick character a lot and he is easily captured and beaten up! I give the film 3 stars.

The Survivors (The Hack Collection Volume One) (Blu-ray) – Well the talented independent filmmaker Steve Rudzinski finally granted my wish of doing a sequel to “Slasher Hunter” and did not disappoint at all. According to Steve, “it’s not just a sequel; it is a sequel to everything he has done.” If you have been following Mr. Rudzinski’s films they all have been leading to something or leave you wanting a little more and it all comes to this… Steve puts everything together in this latest project where ‘The Slashers’ are in complete disarray as Frank is in hell and they lack real leadership. Meanwhile, the group just known as “The Killers” is stronger than ever and keeps two steps ahead of the “Survivor Initiative” until now. “The Slasher Hunters” have some new allies (helps if you have seen some of Steve’s past films to understand some of the characters and why they are there) that includes one my favorite’s ‘Wolfster’. Wolfster is a character Steve came up with early in his filmmaking career I easily could have seen as a movie franchise with a new entry every 12 to 16 months? It all comes down to one final fight between The Slasher Initiative and The Killers leader Norm unless Frank finds a way out of hell? We also find out what was Frank’s worst mistake thanks to hell. This project is beyond hilarious, entertaining, and everything I have expected from such a talented filmmaker. Steve has a way of writing very likable characters good and evil that in my opinion makes him successful for the long haul. Steve this is one of the best independent projects I have seen in 2016 and hope to see a lot more as I give the film 4 out of 4 stars. The copy of “The Survivors” I have is part of “The Hack Collection Volume One” Blu-ray two-disc set that has bloopers, trailers, almost all of Steve’s movies and a lot more. Find out more about the film or purchase it at: www.silverspotlightfilms.moonfruit.com and https://www.facebook.com/SilverSpotlightFilms/?fref=ts&ref=br_tf .

Land of Doom (VHS/DVD-R) – A lesser known C-grade Wasteland film that looked like it used the leftovers from Fred Williamson’s Eye-talian films. The Peter Maris film has a woman named Harmony trying to make her way across the wasteland just trying to get away from everything only to meet up with a man who is trying to get these ‘raiders’ to believe they can rebuild. Cannibals, killer snakes, horrible motorcycles, and no real ending (Thanks Metalstorm) are the highlights of this film as I give it 1 ½ stars.

Marked (DVD) – Six years after a woman witnessed her father murdered and the murderer die in front of her is doing paranormal research for answers. Answers for what not totally sure but it is just another miserable entry into a bloated genre that is starting to rival the other bloated genre, ‘zombies’. I give it 0 stars.

Lost Souls (DVD) – A late 90s flick about John Savage, his wife, and kids just moved into a new home. His daughter happens to be autistic and some murdered children from years ago are trying to communicate through her after they find an old device in storage at the house. Every time the machine is turned on something paranormal happens. After a few twists and turns the family finds out it is the local sheriff with the murdering past. The movie was a TV movie that had a few showings on the now defunct channel UPN before going into obscure cheap paranormal DVD box sets. I give the film 2 stars.

Let Us Prey (DVD) – An Irish film about a new constable starting her job for a station in a small town. While walking the beat she witnesses a drunken kid run down a man. She takes the kid in but cannot find the man. Later the mysterious man is found by other officers and brought in to get a statement but refuses to speak but just stare. The mysterious no name man is put into a cell while they call a doctor and that is when things begin to get weird because anyone that is near the mysterious man knows their deep secrets. But what all inside the station don’t know he is there to collect souls before the stroke of midnight and everyone’s past comes back to haunt them in one way or another. The film starts slow but builds into a chaotic, bloody climax worth checking out. In the end, the movie starting off slow makes a lot of sense after watching it as this is one of those lesser known recent horror movies worth seeking out as I give it 4 stars.

The Gates of Hell 2: Dead Awakening (DVD) – Literally a sequel no one knew about and for good reason. From what I could stay awake for the film is very low budget and set in the early to mid-80s, never mind the dedication to Lucio Fulci. But anyway no zombies and barely demons on-screen that are brought forth by some stupid middle aged men who are also looking for a woman who has a medallion that is supposed to help them with conjuring some demons. The film was mostly shot in Fort Worth, Texas in 1986/1987 according to sketchy information I was able to dig up on it. But fuck it, the movie is so bad it shouldn’t exist so let’s stick with “Death Metal Zombies” and “Heavy Metal Massacre” for our fun bad stuff shall we? I give it 0 stars.

Indigenous (DVD) – The usual crap about stupid American college kids not listening and going to a waterfall in the middle of a dense jungle of Panama. Bad shit happened there supposedly but they don’t listen and go visit only to become dinner to a Chupacabra. But that’s when the movie gets interesting when a guy uploads his video to his social media and it goes viral within four hours causing a military to search for them and millions to watch on 24/7 news channels for their rescue. I liked the monster/Chupacabra looked like an extra form “The Descent” but I thought the movie was much better and interesting when the film took a serious turn in using social media as part of the storyline. Now, I thought if the movie would have continued that storyline instead of wasting storyline and film of the rich kids partying, bumping uglies, drinking, and repeat before they visit the Chupacabra? Then a lot more horror movie fans would be talking about and seeking out this monster flick. Sometime filmmakers it’s better to color outside the lines than keep coloring inside the lines of the same picture film in, film out. For that I give this movie 2 stars.

You can always visit and see some past reviews, independent film news, or me ranting at: www.grossmoviereviews.com !!!

Don’t forget you can also hear Kyle Poling and me talking about horror flicks on a weekly basis on the Bloodbaths and Boomsticks podcast at: www.bloodbathspodcast.blogspot.com/

Don’t forget you can come by the vendor table I will be at for a book, shirt, or a movie March 4, 5, 6^th, 2016 at Pittsburgh’s Horror Realm Convention (for details: www.horrorrealmcon.com) and Cinema Wasteland April 1, 2, 3^rd, 2016 in Strongsville, Ohio (for details: www.cinemawasteland.com) .

Gross Movie Reviews #370

Posted on February 10, 2016 by grossmoviereviews

Gross Movie Reviews #370

By Tim Gross

Sorceress (DVD) – Jim Wynorski and Jack Hill added their two cents to the fantasy world in 1982 with this lower budgeted gem. Twin daughters are born and the evil wizard Traigon demands that the first born be sacrificed. But unsure which was born first wants both put to death while torturing the mother. “The Two that are One” are saved from the evil wizard and Traigon spends the next twenty years searching for them as they spend their days getting naked and punching centaurs in the face. Once Traigon knows their whereabouts we got all kinds of shit going including zombie warriors showing up to the party! It is no “Sword and the Sorcerer” but the fantasy film is still a lot of fun to watch as I give it 2 ½ stars.

Demon Queen (DVD) – One of Donald Farmer’s first films is a mostly incoherent S.O.V. film from 1986 that has a female vamp named Lucinda eating her way through the city or men. Depending how you look at it. The film doesn’t really have a beginning or ending but just exists which is kinda cool in retrospect. If interested www.massacrevideo.com just put together a special edition of the film for DVD which I am sure is well-produced as usual. I give the flick 2 stars. If it helps there is a wonderful face-melting effect in the film.

Scream Dream (VHS/DVD-R) – A couple films later Donald Farmer puts together a much better S.O.V. film that deals with an evil demon-like rock singer named Michelle Shock. Film has an amazing opening as we get to witness a woman being split in half by a chainsaw. Michelle Shock just happens to be the next hottest thing happening in rock music and strange shit happens around her constantly. You soon find out why when Michelle goes down on a male fan and turns into a demon and bites off his junk! Ms. Shock continues her murder spree as management denies everything and news outlets begin to investigate missing persons on nights of her shows. Not wanting to deal with it any longer the record producer fires Michelle Shock to hire a new fresh face. Jamie is the fresh face but just becomes the next meat suit for the demon when she searches out Michelle Shock. A demon, gore, and boobs sum up this fun indy flick. I give it 3 stars.

Amazonia (DVD) – The 1985 film is considered the last of the Eye-talian cannibal films by some but also known as “Cannibal Holocaust 2”, “White Slave”, and “The Catherine Miles Story”. The film claims to be a faithful reconstruction of what happened to Miss Miles over ten years ago. When Catherine was 18 she went into the Amazon with her parents only to be murdered and Catherine to be kidnapped by a tribe. For over the next year she spent her time being tortured and forced to be a part of the tribe that kidnapped her. But after finding out the horrible truth she goes on a bloody rampage. And the story is told from Catherine in court justifying what happened to her and her actions afterwards. Bloody but not as disturbing for most as a “Cannibal Holocaust” but an interesting watch to say the least. The movie is out on DVD in America but is considered an out of print collector’s item. I give the film 3 stars.

Mark of the Devil II (VHS/DVD-R) – The 1973 Austrian/German production is a sequel to the famous cult classic starring Udo Kier. The story follows Countess Elizabeth Von Solmenau and her family being ripped a part because she is accused of witchcraft by a madman named Balthasar Von Ross who killed hundreds of women for their belief in witchcraft. Lots Satan talk, shaving witches, people’s feet being burned, and a seven year old that is accused of becoming a werewolf because of witchcraft! Fun stuff, but interesting enough I cannot find any print of the film on any format after 1986. And I believe the copy I watched is a several generation VHS to DVD-R copy and been told there isn’t a lot of good looking copies out there to begin with? So movie geeks happy hunting as I give it 2 stars.

A Serbian Film (DVD) – A retired male porn star is offered an offer of a lifetime. An offer that will set up his family for the rest of their lives. But of course that is never true as he goes down the down rabbit hole of working with this so-called porn-artist. And the film just goes into the world of sick, disturbing acts that you cannot unwatch. The film is well produced but that is where I stop my praise of the film mainly because I am a monsters and slasher film guy. The subject matter is harsh to say the least and as I said before you cannot unwatch this film after you have watched it. Good or bad this film will find its audience for years to come and not sure I can give this film a fair rating. Sure this review may piss off a few of the fans of this film but hey I am part of the cool crowd I finally watched it! Still haven’t figured out if that was a good thing or not?

The Last Horror Film (DVD) – An odd slasher/serial killer of celebrities flick that stars Joe Spinell and Caroline Munro from 1981. Joe is Vinny Duran, a cab driver with big dreams of going to the Cannes Film Festival meeting his favorite actress Jana Bates and making his movie. Thing is Vinny is what we would call a stalker these days and will stop at nothing to meet Jana and tell her about his script. But friends of Jana are showing up dead and all fingers point to Vinny. And the very last 30 seconds of the film is the greatest as I miss an actor like Joe Spinell. I give the flick 3 stars.

At the Earth’s Core (DVD) – Peter Cushing and Doug McClure have built a machine that can dig through dirt at a quick pace at hopes of discovering something new under the earth’s crust. But what they find is much more as they find a whole new world in the outer and inner core of earth. Which of course includes Caroline Munro and friends being slaves, to some weird dinosaur birds that hang glide? And things that keep the cave people in line to do their bidding or just keep the magma from flooding the city and killing them all. A wonderful and mildly entertaining mid-70s flick which has Peter Cushing not in his usual serious role. I am sure at some point this film was a staple for early 80s horror hosts as I give the film 2 ½ stars. The film just recently got a really awesome looking Blu-ray well worth the cash.

The Fear Chamber (DVD) – A lesser known film about a police chief played by Steven Williams who puts his best detective on a case of a guy (Richard Tyson) who plays doctor with female victims he kidnaps. The detective almost catches him in the act but is stabbed in the chest and gets a heart transplant. Now he sees female ghosts who give him clues of how to find the evil doctor and his next victims. I like the ending that ties up the loose ends of the story. Not first movie I would go rent but definitely something to keep for a rainy day if interested as I give it 2 ½ stars.

You can always visit and see some past reviews, independent film news, or me ranting at: www.grossmoviereviews.com !!!

Don’t forget you can also hear Kyle Poling and me talking about horror flicks on a weekly basis on the Bloodbaths and Boomsticks podcast at: www.bloodbathspodcast.blogspot.com/

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Reichsfuhrer SS is now available on Amazon!!!

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