Gross Movie Reviews #379
Sorceress (Blu-ray) – Wynorski fans will be so happy to find out that finally the uncensored version of this film has been released to Blu-ray. A project that had Wynorski fans talking for years on whether there was an actual uncensored version or not and had them scouring the conventions for the uncensored release. But it’s here kids in all its uncensored beautiful, crisp, clean glory and has two entertaining commentaries. But more on that later… And for those who do not know the title of this Wynorski/Fred Olen Ray joint, it was also under the title ‘Temptress’ which has a sequel. The film stars Linda Blair and Julie Strain as witches. Strain’s character Erica will stop at nothing to help her husband Larry moves up the corporate ladder. So of course she gets naked and turns to witchcraft. Fucks up Amelia’s (Linda Blair) husband but Erica’s husband is not happy and Erica falls to her death! Pissed off, Amelia turns to witchcraft for revenge. It all ends with the ‘Wisdom’ ending. (A mid-80s film I blame for starting a chain reaction in low and big budget films where in the end nothing happened. Look it up it stars Emilio Estevez and Demi Moore.) The film is okay but the main course or reason you need this for your collection isn’t the movie itself but possibly one of my favorite commentaries of all-time is on this new disc. The first commentary is Jim Wynorski but the second commentary is Wynorski and special effects guru Tom Savini. Within five minutes the commentary derails into a comedy of Wynorski forgetting about what’s going on screen and trying to answer Savini’s questions which are absolutely hilarious. A few of Savini’s questions and comments: Is Julie Strain a man? He questions today’s porn and compares it to Wynorski’s films. He admits not owning a Wynorski film. Questions if there was ever a plot to the film? Witches don’t make any money. And now Wynorski and Savini will be making a film called, “Blummy”! Kids, this commentary alone makes this Blu-ray well worth being in your collection. I give the film 2 out of 4 stars but the commentaries and package 4 out of 4 stars as Synapse Films is brilliant for putting this together. You can purchase the Blu-ray at www.synapse-films.com .
X-men: Apocalypse (Theater) – The last film had me so excited what the future holds for the franchise and they did not disappoint. Now that they have rebooted, refigured with a younger cast it allows the filmmakers to really get into some geeky fun stories of the X-men universe! This time around the original mutant named ‘Apocalypse’ has awakened and needs his four horsemen to take control back from the humans. He was the original and wants Professor X to add to his mass of mutant powers that he has absorbed over the years. Just like ‘Captain America: Civil War’ everyone gets equal amount of time except Logan or should I say “Weapon X” but has a memorable scene to push forth another later storyline. Fun summer movie stuff as I give the flick 3 ½ stars. Bring me the X-23 film damn it!
The Unborn (DVD) – There is several films with this title but this film is from 1991 that was under the Roger Corman wing. Brooke Adams plays a woman who is having trouble getting pregnant and goes see James Karen because he has the reputation of helping women getting pregnant. But of course it’s James Karen and he is evil and oh yeah he just happens to be experimenting with the unborn babies trying to make them better. Everything goes well at first as Adams character sees other expecting mothers who went to the same clinic but shit hits the fan when the mothers begin to change and kill their spouses/girlfriends and the babies want blood! A fun movie to show to people who are about to have a kid as I give it 2 ½ stars.
The Unborn II (DVD) – The sequel came out three years later direct-to-video again from the Roger Corman wing where a woman is tracking down the babies that were started at the clinic from the first film. She knows they are evil and fucked up and the film gets rolling quickly as she shoots a kid in a playground. The film becomes a little boring at times but nothing like a crazy woman tracking down kids and killing them even if it means killing them in the hospital bed after just being born! Lots of blood splatters kids as I give the film 2 stars.
Killer Elite (DVD) – Based on a true story during 1980/1981 where a special ops guy (Jason Statham) gets out of the business until a year later his mentor (Robert DeNiro) was taken hostage because of a high priced job. The reason is six million dollars and he try to run because it’s all about oil that some secret UK guys want but don’t want the public to know. So time for Statham to go kick ass on both sides and get his mentor back so he can retire again. I give the film 2 ½ stars.
Vampire Bats (DVD) – So some mutated bats have eaten everything in the bayou of Louisiana and now out to feast on the local population. Lucy Lawless plays a college biology professor who knows about bats and wants to capture a few so she can determine how and why they mutated before they feast on the whole community. When it comes to killer bat movies this movie is pretty generic and for the most part I can see why this film doesn’t pop up any horror website or channel’s radar as I give it 1 star.
Rock & Rule (DVD) – An animated film released in 1983 that failed miserably from lack of promotion and several other things that was made to be on par with ‘Heavy Metal’. But I believe its four years in the making maybe didn’t help it either but well worth searching out if you love animation and music being smashed together. The war has happened, all humans are gone, and out of the ashes mutants and animals have taken humans place on earth. Meanwhile an evil dude ‘Mok’ is the greatest music artist ever and he is looking for that “voice” to unlock a portal to another dimension. He finds in a singer named ‘Angel’ and steals her away from her band to bring a demon forth to kill everyone! Cheap Trick, Iggy Pop, Earth, Wind, and Fire are some of the bands on the soundtrack. Cool film to watch but not on the same level as ‘Heavy Metal’ for me at least as I give the picture 2 ½ stars.
Lady Death (DVD) – A 2004 animated movie to the cult comic book series about the daughter of Lucifer. Set in the 15th century and Hope is pure at heart but does not know about her father until it’s too late when the locals show up to kill him in the name of god. When he shows his true self and escape they snatch her up to burn at the stake. When burning she says the prayer so her soul can be with her true love but instead is tortured in hell. She escapes into the realm of hell and learns she may be still pure of heart but is Lucifer’s daughter and has unimaginable powers that begin to change her and fill her with rage towards her father. She trains, gets big boobs, a big sword, two werewolf looking dogs, and an army and they attack Lucifer! Was never a fan of the comic book series and the movie itself wasn’t truly exciting but I am sure there is some fans out there that didn’t know an animated film existed as I give it 2 stars.
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