Gross Movie Reviews #384

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Gross Movie Reviews #384

 

Full Eclipse (DVD) – Oh the glory of random HBO original movies… This lesser known werewolf film if you can classify it as that was released in 1993 starring Bruce Payne, Mario Van Peebles, Patsy Kensit, Dean Norris, Jennifer Rubin, and Paula Marshall. Max is a young cop who just lost his partner in a chaotic hostage takeover of a nightclub. Some time passes and his partner is back and good as new or so it seems. Meanwhile a man named Adam Garou wants Max to be part of his “special forces unit” within the police department. They help reduce crime drastically where ever Garou goes. Max not being a team player thinks something is weird and sees it in person when he is invited to a raid of a mob party where this group turns monstrous and kills all! Garou injects the team with a serum of his making that makes the team impervious to pain or being killed. One problem you are part werewolf and could go mad or become disfigured if you do not take the serum on a regular basis. ‘Full Eclipse’ is a very different twist on the werewolf genre that not many horror fans talk about plus added bonus debating if it was influenced by the ‘Wolverine’ character, just sayin? I give the werewolf film 3 stars.

 

Helen Keller vs. Nightwolves (DVD) – Let that title sink in for a minute as it is totally based on an accurate account of Alabama in 1910… Helen and family are attacked by these vicious creatures known as Nightwolves which causes her to be deaf and blind. So Helen takes upon herself to defend her small town and family against the evil creatures with some help from Barry Bostwick. The film also includes a hilarious line when Helen first meets Barry Bostwick’s character and feels his face and says, “It feels like Bruce Campbell”. This movie had me laughing from the time it began to after the credits as it takes nothing serious and that’s good in my book as I give it 3 stars.

 

Ozark Sharks (DVD/SyFy Channel) – Sharks have infested a Colorado lake and there is a dude with a Jeep Cherokee Truck that has a harpoon gun attached to it just because. Okay I will watch but I didn’t say it was good as I give it 1 star.

 

Shark Killer (DVD) – Arnold Vosloo is an unstoppable bad ass who likes diamonds and lives in South Africa. Someone screws over Vosloo and the biggest diamond on earth has been swallowed by a great white shark. The only one that can help is bootleg Chris Pratt aka Chase Walker who makes his living with sharks, sort of. His brother is the one that screwed over Vosloo and Vosloo has been shot, burned, and attacked by sharks but keeps coming. A wonderful overlooked B-movie worth watching with friends and enjoy the cheese but be entertained also as I give the flick 2 ½ stars.

 

Sharknado 4: The 4th Awakens (DVD/SyFy Channel) – It’s been five years since the last known Sharknado has hit anywhere in the world. Ian Ziering as Finn has been resting comfortable at home with his and April’s son and decides to go to Las Vegas. There is the epicenter of Tommy Davidson’s invention of a weather destabilizer and many located around the world stop the Sharknados before they ever get started until now. This time around the Sharknados get started on land and cannot be stopped as there is a snownado, firenado, radioactive Sharknado, you name the nado! Finn rushes back to Kansas to save his son but must help everyone along the way. Tara Reid returns from the aid of her father Gary Busey. David Hasselhoff returns, Lloyd Kaufman makes an appearance, horror fans get Caroline Williams from ‘TCM 2’ fame to make not one but two references to ‘Texas Chainsaw Massacre’, and if that wasn’t enough Steve Guttenberg shows up with a Stephen King ‘Christine’ reference! The series is fun but as I said last time out I believe the series needs to end as I give it 2 stars.

 

2 Lava 2 Lantula (DVD/SyFy Channel) – I believe I have finally broken the computer’s spellcheck with that title? Steve Guttenberg is back as Colton and this time he has to go save his college-aged daughter in Florida as the lava spiders are attacking again. With the help of his partner Michael Winslow, Colton leaves his latest film project to find his daughter, throw out I believe a very random ‘Cocoon’ reference, and fight with Martin Kove about not waking the queen lava spider and long enough for Kove to say “sweep the leg”. The sequel still has the magic of the first film but like ‘Sharknado’ kill off the series before it becomes a shell of itself and where in the hell is the real star Michael Varrati? I give the sequel that had some awesome trailers 3 stars.

 

Spectre (DVD) – James Bond faces his own extinction and must make a choice as the demise of the “007” program is about to be finalized but for the wrong reasons. With no one to trust and being tracked by his own government James must find out why the program is about to go away but why one man is about to be given all the power of most of the world’s securities and be able to track and see anything and everything. I really enjoyed the Bond film as I thought it was a spectacular ending to the recent stretch of Daniel Craig entries. Will it be his last remains to be seen but if there is one more this has made sure we will get finally a stand-alone Bond film that has no connection to the past films. This film presents a case that Bond is still relevant as I give it 3 stars.

 

Outlaw of Gor (VHS/Comet TV) – The Professor Cabot once again returns to the world of Gor where the place he once saved is in trouble as a high priest and a cheating queen cause issues in the kingdom. The high priest is played by Jack Palance and this 1988 film has made it on many bad film lists over the years and one of the more popular episodes of MST3K among fans. For me it’s a sequel and I seen the first fantasy film so of course I needed to see this oddity as I give it 2 stars.

 

Frontier Marshal (YouTube) – As a request from a friend I watched this western to review it and glad I did. The 1939 film is all about Wyatt Earp and the O.K. Coral and put it simply influences the modern day film ‘Tombstone’ that stars Kurt Russell and Val Kilmer. It’s wild as we get to see a young John Carradine, a young Cesar Romero play Doc Holliday, and the Wolfman himself Lon Chaney Jr. playing a henchmen/paid gunman. Enough violence to make it stand out from the usual westerns of the day but its portrayal of the O.K. Coral is amazing and you understand why so many kids of that era wanted to be cowboys. I give this oldie but goodie 3 ½ stars.

Creature Feature

Creature Feature (DVD/Vimeo) – Filmmaker Chase Smith presents to you an anthology of scary stories that are being told by a group of friends trying to scare each other at a Halloween party. We have clown statues, revenge zombies, witches, scarecrow/pumpkin man, and a haunted house with a baby killer/werewolf who lives there. The group is trying to scare the shit out of each other with each story as drink more and more but who ends up scaring who is the twist. The 80s inspired anthology screams fun with its short quick stories, nudity, and gore and gives horror/Halloween themed film fans something else to look forward to watch for the upcoming Halloween holiday as I give the film 2 ½ out of 4 stars. You can found out more about the film at www.braindamagefilms.com and www.midnightreleasing.com .

 

Batman: The Killing Joke (DVD) – The comic book story of Batman and Joker of where Joker crossing the line comes to animation film land. Batman has been training Batgirl/Barbara Gordon for a few years now and things have become different at least for Batgirl. Frustrated, she goes out on her own to fight a mob boss’ son who wants to get in the head of Batgirl. Once resolved and the relationship has changed between Batman and Batgirl, The Joker has found his way out of the asylum and has big plans for Commissioner Gordon and his daughter. I enjoyed the film till the end where Batman and the Joker just laugh together instead of killing each other. I am sure there is some comic book nerds that will explain this to me but I thought someone die after Barbara Gordon was raped at gun point. I give the film 2 stars.

Hollywood Nightmare

Hollywood Nightmare (DVD/Vimeo) – Another Chase Smith film that stars Zoe Meyers as a stuck up actress Kendall Summers who thinks she is a movie star before she has become one. Kendall walks off her latest project for the weekend to get together with friends and show off her new million dollar home she just signed the papers to lease. Once there her two friends have better plans as their boyfriends show up and Kendall is forced to go to bed alone and drunk. Annoyed, Kendall keeps hearing noises all night. Next morning Kendall practicing lines for Monday’s scenes notices a shadow/a dark figure while studying the tape of her lines. When the leasing agent Sam keeps showing up unexpected, Kendall begins to question Sam about the history of the home. Sam is vague about everything as Kendall continues to hear noises, have dreams, and see a dark figure. The film is a fun thriller that runs a little longer than I like but the performance of Zoe Meyers is what makes this story work as I give the film 3 out of 4 stars. You can find out more at: www.braindamagefilms.com and www.midnightreleasing.com .

 

Reviled: Ep. 2 (Vimeo) – Filmmaker Jim Stramel continues his zombie saga that revolves around zombie pit fighting in the south. The events happen after the zombie apocalypse has come and gone and were a blimp on the social radar screen. Frank and his zombie daughter travel in their dirty van killing or crippling zombies in the illegal sport for money. But the real story is how Frank is still attached to his undead daughter and refuses to let go. This episode continues to introduce some new characters and expand the universe of this unique idea. Its dirty, has a lot of grime, a little gory, and absolutely beautiful zombie universe. My favorite part of this episode might be the kids selling bug spray for 25 cents as it is a little thing that makes it known to me that Jim Stramel takes this project seriously and make me wanting more! I give it 3 ½ out of 4 stars. Wanna check it out or maybe throw a few dollars Stramel and company’s way to help fund future episodes go to: www.reviledzombieseries.com .

 

Vile Prey (DVD) – Independent filmmaker Tim Novotny has a new sick horror project out there. It begins with three men doing a blood ritual of sorts but we are quickly thrown into a scene of brutality as the three men are torturing a couple during a house invasion. Credits roll… with news clips on television about murders, serial killer, and the local authorities being baffled but determined in solving these small county murders. But the three men are getting sloppy with their work and what seems just another torture movie takes a left turn when Marcus, the leader’s van has engine trouble on a dark back road. Soon they are being watched by someone with a night vision gun scope who captures Marcus. Beats him up a little, drugs him, and explains it is time for a hunt as Marcus is left disoriented in the middle of the woods. The man is named Max and he captures Marcus’ two cohorts to torture and maim them. The weird thing is Max’s brother is Dan head of the police department who knows all about what Max is doing in the middle of the dark woods. They believe in justice and covering it up so the feds believe the killer or killers are dead or captures. Novotny does a balancing act between thriller and just another torture revenge flick with ‘Vile Prey’. The film could have gone in many directions and I would not be surprised if there were several revisions of the script from Novotny as I can easily see the talented filmmaker revisiting this material again for another twisted project. ‘Vile Prey’ is somewhat brutal and interesting and shows Novotny is just getting started writing and directing wise as I give the flick 2 ½ out of 4 stars. For more info and to see the trailer check out: www.facebook.com/VilePrey .

 

Legendary (DVD) – The film is also known as ‘Tomb of the Dragon’ and stars Scott Adkins as Dr. Preston who is a cryptozoologist who is tracks down strange creatures to see if they exist or they are just mere myth. On his latest expedition one of his young assistants is killed when they find a prehistoric bear and Dolph Lundgren as Harker shoots at it wanting another trophy on his wall. Months have pass and lawsuits are piling up from Harker until a mysterious lawyer comes by the office to have Dr. Preston look into a dragon/giant lizard/croc-like creature attacking in China. The creature keeps attacking a facility that has already hired Harker to kill the creature. This is a Saturday night SyFy Channel film if I ever seen one and with Adkins and Lundgren starring in it this film was a blast as I give it 3 stars.

 

Dead Rising: Endgame (On Demand) – Jesse Metcalfe is back as Chase Carter the reporter who broke the story about Zombrex and the military and based on the video game. Two years have passed and Chase has entered the East Mission Quarantine Zone tracking his story still about the military and the zombies. The military has expanded to using drug dealers in and out of the quarantined zone in exchange for fresh subjects for experimentation. Chase gets the footage but starts the clock on the “Afterlife Project”. A fail safe for the military to kill all 1.5 million people who are infected and have the tracking devices implanted in them at the same time. Ultimately the military will release another zombie virus into the population for them to keep the experiment going. Chase with the help of his news team and his gun nut friend go through the infected city to get to the V.A. hospital to shut down the Afterlife Project from its source. Plus what is a zombie without Billy Zane as a crazy doctor experimenting on humans and zombies? A fun zombie video game adaption that goes unnoticed because it’s not called ‘Resident Evil’. I enjoyed both games but feel ‘Dead Rising’ is the superior zombie movie series thus far or until ‘Resident Evil’ gets rebooted as it needs to be? Zombie fans stop waiting for the next lame season of ‘The Walking Dead’ and live or die a little and take a chance watching these entertaining zombie flicks as I give this sequel 3 stars.

 

Alien Uprising (Blu-ray) – An alien film that is British, has Jean-Claude Van Damme for twenty minutes, and the aliens win? Okay you got my attention! Once all the power goes out and the military is fighting a losing battle against aliens a group of friends fight to survive and go visit Uncle JCVD… A little different and worth the watch for weird people like me and Jon Cross as I give it 2 ½ stars.

 

Any comments or questions please send to grossmoviereview@verizon.net or www.facebook.com/grossmoviereviews . Remember folks always support your local independent movie theater, independent video store, and independent filmmakers! It will keep horror alive………

You can always visit and see some past reviews, independent film news, or me ranting at: www.grossmoviereviews.com !!!

Don’t forget you can also hear Kyle Poling and me talking about horror flicks on a weekly basis on the Bloodbaths and Boomsticks podcast at: www.bloodbathspodcast.blogspot.com/

Plus you can always go to the greatest T-shirt place online or if you are in Texas visit the store of “Fast Custom Shirts” where T-shirt Joe is the only place you should purchase your horror T-shirts: Go to www.fastcustomshirts.com for details.

Gross Movie Reviews #383

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Gross Movie Reviews #383

 Terror

Terror at London Bridge (VHS/Comet TV) – Oh the days of TV movies of the 70s and 80s where to fill time slots during the summer they would make horrible movies with actors and actresses of popular network show… We have David Hasselhoff (1985) playing a detective in London, Arizona who is investigating odd murders on the London Bridge that has been brought to America brick by brick. But it is missing one from the Jack the Ripper days in the 1880s. The brick is found and sent to London, Arizona to have a celebration of completing the bridge. And now Jack the Ripper is back killing again in this NBC TV movie. The Hoff not enough? How about Stephanie Kramer from ‘Hunter’ TV show or Adrienne Barbaeu or Clu Glugar as The Hoff’s boss? The movie is bad but a very fun bad and nostalgic trip down TV movie memory lane. I also believe the film can be found in full YouTube. I give this masterpiece 2 ½ stars.

 

Unidentified (DVD) – A movie about four work friends heading out to Vegas for a weekend of fun. They take a side trip to a remote town only to be scared away before heading to Vegas to take off on some dude they owed money too. Once out in the desert they get lost and followed by something, aliens in this case. I really wanted to like this film but its shaky-cam and taking way too long building up the four friends makes it annoying. I like when horror flicks give characters some background but this went far above and beyond like it was hiding a weak film? If into these types of films maybe go with ‘Area 51’ or ‘As Far So Below’ as I give this stinker 1 star.

 

Fender Bender (DVD/Chiller Channel) – A serial killer in S&M gear when killing gets victims’ information by getting in fender benders. When he meets a new driver he stalks her in her friends in her house during a weekend that her parents go out of town. The trailers looked so much better than film. It had a great opening but from there its 80 minutes of the weird creepy stalking a teenager which more boring as the film goes on. It makes you think it could have a better short film than feature. I give it 1 ½ stars.

 

Crawlspace (DVD) – Mid-80s crazy Klaus Kinski who is the son of a Nazi doctor who is also obsessed with death. Oh yes fellow horror fans, this flick is well worth revisiting time and time again as Mr. Kinski’s character only rents out to cute college women. This is mainly because he enjoys stalking them with the old ductwork of the building but also because he is bat shit fucking crazy! A very underrated film from Empire Pictures that us old folk are trying to push upon the new generations of horror fans and for good reason as I give this 3 ½ stars.

 

Cast A Deadly Spell (DVD) – Fred Ward as Phillip Lovecraft, a private dick, set in the 40s where everyone has accepted witchcraft as everyday life except Lovecraft. Well David Warner’s character hires him to find a mythical thingy and bring it back to me in two days or for a special ritual that involves his virgin daughter. Cthulhu, demons, end of the world fun shit. So while Lovecraft finds the mythical thingy he also learns that may be bad to give it to David Warner. Great movie on several fronts: film noir genre, Lovecraft genre, creature genre, it has it all in this HBO production that most horror fans forget. I believe it’s because of the bad sequel that stars Dennis Hopper two years later which killed any chance of a series? But what do I know? Anyway if you are Cthulhu fan this film is well worth your time tracking down as I give the flick 3 stars.

 

Johnny Mnemonic (DVD) – Keanu Reeves pretty much right after ‘Speed’ takes on a character where he is carrier of information where it’s uploaded into your skull in this futuristic film. A film that centers on the haves and the have nots. Johnny has uploaded more than he can carry in his mid and wants it out. But his boy Udo Kier has set him up as the information that was uploaded is a cure for the “shakes” or “black plague” I think they refer to once? But with the help of his bodyguard Dina Meyer and her scientist friend Henry Rollins they just might be able to get the information out without killing him. If the information doesn’t then Dolph Lundgren’s character “The Preacher” will! A mid-90s film which I thought was horrible when first released but for an odd reason has actually gotten better with age as I revisit the film every few years. If anything it is better than ‘Hackers’… I give it 2 ½ stars.

 

The Invisible Invaders (DVD/Theater) – Oh bless Bruce Lentz’s heart for showing this flick to me and a shitload of people. A late 50s film where invisible aliens land on earth and reanimate John Carradine’s corpse to threaten the world. Basically the aliens feel threaten by earthlings since they have developed the atom bomb and want to use it again. Hilarious B-movie action my friends and fun for the whole family as I give it 3 stars.

 

Batman v Superman: Dawn of Justice (On Demand) – People are now threaten that Superman can kill all mankind at any point in time so Batman takes it upon himself to stop Superman himself. We are introduced to Wonder Woman and how the “Justice League” starts. It’s a fun popcorn movie nothing great. But just like the ‘Avengers 2’ and ‘Captain America: Civil War’ films they are filler until bigger things come along movie wise. Ben Affleck was okay, the death of Superman could have been its own flick, and Wonder Woman just like the new/old Spidey earlier this year stole the show. Sorry folks we all just need to calm down at times and just enjoy the escape these films can present as I give this 2 ½ stars.

 

Necronomicon: Book of the Dead (YouTube) – A film that just completely baffles a lot of us why this has not found its way on DVD. But also I remember when it was first made it wasn’t like the movie got released right away too so who knows why this film has issues getting out to us nerds. Anyway its anthology film set up by Jeffrey Combs playing H.P. Lovecraft, set in the 30s, going to visit a weirdo church/library thingy with crazy priests that watch over it. Mr. Lovecraft reads through “The Book of the Dead” not realizing it he is unlocking the Cthulhu. The stories involve a great cast in Bruce Payne, David Warner, Richard Lynch, and the beautiful Maria Ford (awesome actress with a great resume but no Kristy Swanson, Tiffany Shepis, or Kathleen Kinmont). The most intriguing thing of the film is Jeffrey Combs/Lovecraft looks a hell of a lot like ‘Army of Darkness’ Bruce Campbell? (Go to YouTube for the trailer and check out the comments many people agree). Another intriguing aspect of the film is Mr. Combs and Mr. Yunza did not get along on set as Mr. Combs did like how the Lovecraft character was portrayed. Okay film buffs go to Google machines as I go find a beer and give this anthology 2 ½ stars.

 

Atomic Shark (DVD/SyFy Channel) – Jeff Fahey stars in a shark film where the shark is radioactive from possible radiation leaking from a sunken Russian sub or just the military testing bombs back in the day. Either way, interesting concept for a B-shark flick that also stars David Faustino as a dude trying to use drones to capture footage of babes on the beach. It’s all up to the wannabe Baywatch bunch and creepy Faustino to try and figure out how to kill a radioactive shark that melts its victims before it even gets to eat them. I give it 2 ½ stars.

 

Dam Sharks! (DVD/SyFy Channel) – Yep, the moment someone is really reaching for shark movie ideas. But shit, you know I will still watch… at least once! Jason London stars as a bloated rich dude who owns some weirdo computer business that comes up with inventions and decides his workforce needs a retreat weekend. Or at least the ones that survive the downsizing of his company. But they have bigger problems as sharks have infested a river where they were trapped and now become beavers of sorts as they use human victims as the building blocks for their dam. Yes you read that right kids. Damn you SyFy as I give it 1 ½ stars.

 

Ice Sharks (DVD/SyFy Channel) – Somewhere past Greenland in the Arctic Circle the ice is melting faster than researchers believe. So with this happening ancient sharks have appeared that never been seen before and now are breaking through the thin ice fucking people up. Who would have guessed it took this long to make a global warming shark flick where they would be in the Arctic? Now add in a Kurt Russell with a flame thrower this film may have been watchable as I give it 1 star.

 

Planet of the Sharks (DVD/SyFy Channel) – Absolutely loved how this one started out as ‘Waterworld’ with sharks on a low budget. But as usual my dreams of being just a crazy cheese ball movie are crushed when they try to give it a lackluster storyline of how the polar ice caps melted and the sharks now feast on humans since there is no fish left. This film really acts like a sequel to ‘Ice Sharks’? Wait… is this like ‘Slumber Party Massacre’ and ‘Cheerleader Massacre aka Slumber Party Massacre 4’ scenario? Shit! No, Michelle Bauer I’m out. When are yinz properly gonna steal ideas from my brain and have ‘Z-Nation’ meet ’12 Monkeys’ meet ‘Farscape’… with sharks? Come on SyFy don’t act like that’s a horrible idea. Nothing was more horrible than destroying this great low budget idea that I watched get crushed slowly into fecal matter aftermath for ‘Sharknado 4’, just sayin. I give the film ½ star, remember I did like the idea but that was before I seen it on film.

 

Any comments or questions please send to grossmoviereview@verizon.net or www.facebook.com/grossmoviereviews . Remember folks always support your local independent movie theater, independent video store, and independent filmmakers! It will keep horror alive………

You can always visit and see some past reviews, independent film news, or me ranting at: www.grossmoviereviews.com !!!

Don’t forget you can also hear Kyle Poling and me talking about horror flicks on a weekly basis on the Bloodbaths and Boomsticks podcast at: www.bloodbathspodcast.blogspot.com/

Plus you can always go to the greatest T-shirt place online or if you are in Texas visit the store of “Fast Custom Shirts” where T-shirt Joe is the only place you should purchase your horror T-shirts: Go to www.fastcustomshirts.com for details.

Gross Movie Reviews #382

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Gross Movie Reviews #382

 

Howling II: My Sister is a Werewolf (DVD) – The sequel to the original and highly successful ‘The Howling’ takes a complete left turn introducing a whole other idea of werewolves among us instead of just owning a small community in the mountains. The sequel goes for the jugular with it’s over the top chaos of introducing Sybil Danning as a head werewolf fulfilling a prophecy and Christopher Lee as a man of the occult. The film picks up from the end of the first film in the sense of Dee Wallace’s brother wants answers but also just wants to bury her and be done with it. But after Lee’s occult character shows him a video tape of her changing into a werewolf and going to her grave to silver in her heart he believes. They travel to Transylvania to fight the werewolves on their turf and we get fun 80s music, punks, werewolf orgies, Christopher Lee being Christopher Lee, werewolf vision, hilarious and fun B-movie stuff. The sequel does have its fans but also there is a few horror fans believe this sequel destroyed what could have been a very good series of movies. Right or wrong this film was fun when I was a teenager but doesn’t hold up as well as maybe part five or six in the series? I give this flick 2 ½ stars.

 Holwing-v__The_Rebirth

Howling V: The Rebirth (DVD) – This sequel is easily one of my favorite ‘Howling’ films. Being released direct-to-video in 1989 where horror sequels were still being churned out almost daily trying to cash-in. The ‘Howling’ series is a werewolf series that clearly suffers from lack of direction like the ‘Hellraiser’ series later on after it. I believe this film was actually some random werewolf film that got the title change when someone figured that the series could use a change as the three sequels before it sent horror fans screaming far away from the series. But anyway the film is a classic “Who dun it?” or this case “Who is the werewolf?” The film begins in 1849 Budapest, where a group of people are in a bloody heap around a dinner table inside a huge castle. Before you ask, no it wasn’t Charles Band’s castle… But anyway people have been slayed in the name of god to stop the werewolf curse. Problem a baby survives! Present time, 1989, a group of people have been invited to an opening of the castle that hasn’t been open since the slaughter of 1849. With little information given the group speculates on why or how they got the invite and what is the story behind the castle and its history. A snowstorm moves in and one by one the invitees disappear being killed by a werewolf. The film could have used a little more gore but I totally believe it still holds up many years later as one of the best sequels of the series. Everybody forgets there is seven films in the series plus a forgettable “Twilightish” reboot. So if you are looking for a good werewolf film no one talks about this would be a good place to start my friends as I give the film 3 ½ stars.

howling 6

Howling VI: Freaks (DVD) – Two years after ‘The Rebirth’ we got another direct-to-video sequel in the series that seem to have less of a budget but another intriguing storyline. This one involves a Freak show run by Harker (Bruce Payne) who he and companions roll through the small dying town Canton Bluff. Meanwhile a British drifter named Ian rolls through town looking for work but is secretive about why he is really there. Harker finds out about Ian’s secret (a werewolf) and uses a spell to make him transform when he wants aka for the show. Harker captures Ian in attempt to use him but turns the town against him after Ian escapes but little the town knows is that Harker is a vampire. Again another fun entry into the series that doesn’t get talked about much but also like ‘Puppet Master’ or ‘Hellraiser’ doesn’t connect it to other sequels in the series. I give the werewolf sequel 3 stars.

 

I Love Lucy (YouTube) – A normal looking short film idea about a girl named Lucy who is going to the Valentine’s dance with her perfect boyfriend Rex. Lucy’s girlfriends seem to be pressuring her into thinking its “time” and she will enjoy “it” but Lucy hesitates. Lucy even feels pressure from the school principal. But once home and Lucy and her boyfriend are alone in her bedroom that is when the short film gets truly weird and bizarre and I enjoyed it! The short film is from Zach Lorkiewicz and I always love seeing truly cool stuff like this from unknown filmmakers. Want more info or see a trailer check out: www.facebook.com/counttheclock and www.counttheclock.com as I give the short film 3 ½ out of 4 stars.

 

Return to Salem’s Lot (DVD) – A sequel to Stephen King’s TV movie from the late 70s truly came out of left field in the late 80s but was a staple of late night cable television. Michael Moriarity stars as Joe who is in the Amazon taking video of a tribe that has never been seen before. The tribe is chased off by the locals only to tell Joe he needs to get back to the states for his son. His ex-wife cannot control him any longer so Joe decides it’s time for him and his kid to head to Maine where his aunt left him some property. Maybe there they can get closer and know each other again. But as they enter the town of ‘Salem’s Lot’ they know it’s not your normal town as not many people around during the day. They shortly learn the town is full of vampires and the judge wants Joe to write the town’s bible/history to share with the world in maybe a hundred years or so. Especially since the vamps came over on the Mayflower! Once Joe understands this is wrong and the judge is trying to take his boy and teams up with an old dude who knows the judge from years ago. They go house to house burning down ‘Salem’s Lot’ so they can escape. The effects are a little cheesy, it has nothing to do with the original, but it has Michael Moriarity and makes a great double bill with ‘Sundown’. I’m always in when it comes to these oddball 80s sequels as I give it 3 stars.

 

The Divine Enforcer (VHS/DVD-R) – Oh yeah mother fuckers a cast of Jan-Michael Vincent, Eric Estrada, Jim Brown, Robert Z’Dar, Judy Landers, and Scott Shaw (Rollerblade Warriors: Taken by Force fame) show up in this 1992 direct-to-video B-flick about a priest taking the law into his own hands. Father Daniels shows up at his new parish that happens to be in a rough neighborhood. But he can only take so many horrible confessions from horrible individuals. Father Daniels takes down the local mob, strip clubs, but the one he is having trouble with is the serial killer “Vampire of Los Angeles”. With the help from a woman who has ‘the gift of sight’ Father Daniels eventually tracks down this murderous evil. Also pay attention to the last scene of the film, hilarious crap folks as I give this B-movie gift 2 ½ stars.

 

The Killer Elite (DVD) – Not knowing the Statham and DeNiro film was a remake of this 1975 flick it made me want to track down a copy and check it out. The film stars James Cann and Robert Duvall as two agents from a secret part of the government who do things the military or the regular government cannot. Well Duvall’s character wants more money and decides to shoot Cann in the arm and knee to retire him. A year or so later after rehab, Cann has a new life but is approached by his old boss about a job that could help him get revenge. Good flick but for me not as much fun as the remake which surprised me a little as I give this 70s action flick 2 stars.

 

Hard Target (DVD) – A John Woo film produced by Sam Raimi that stars Jean-Claude Van Damme, Lance Henriksen, Arnold Vosloo, Yancy Butler, and Wilford Brimley… Brilliant! Set in New Orleans where Lance Henriksen plays a bad villain who sets up human hunts for rich people. When Butler’s character comes along looking for her homeless father she screws up the perfect hunt and its all-out war on Jean-Claude’s character ‘Chance’. A great 90s action flick worth revisiting just for JCVD’s glorious mullet! I give the film 3 stars for the mere reason they figured out how to push in two bad ass dudes (Henriksen and Vosloo) into one action flick.

 

Cell (Theater) – The film based on a more recent Stephen King story that involves cell phones. After the book was released in the early 2000s there was a frenzy of companies trying to buy the rights for the film adaption. After a lot of scuttlebutt of Eli Roth being attached in the early stages of the film the project went quiet for a few years. Then John Cusack got a hold of the project and the ball was rolling again and finally made. Cusack is Clay, a man who gets off a plane and wants to see his son and celebrate with his great news. But his cell phone battery dies. He tries to call on a pay phone but notices people begin going nuts killing each other, eating each other, smashing their heads off of pillars; planes crashing… you get the picture. End of the world kinda stuff folks! Clay and Samuel Jackson’s character meet up on a subway car and leave to go to Clay’s apartment to decide on what they should do next? Clay wants to get back to his son up north believing he is still alive and as long as they don’t listen to their phones signal they won’t turn into mindless zombies of sorts. The film is shorter than I thought it would be but still interesting like the book. My only issue with the film is the ending as in the book it just kinda ends where the film tries to give a twist that doesn’t make much sense. But like most of Stephen King’s works he has trouble ending stuff as many horror fans would agree. Is this the perfect version of the film I wanted for the book, “No”. But I still really enjoyed this horror flick for the mere fact the signal isn’t really explained and this easily can happen these days. I give the film 3 stars and sit back and let all the other film geeks argue over the movie as like most horror films I enjoyed it for what it is.

 

Monster from the Surf (DVD) – A groovy mid-60s film where some beach bums grooving to some surf music, surfing, and partying get attacked by a sea creature. The main suspect just happens to be a crippled dude named Mark that lives down the beach since the cops don’t believe in a sea creature? A film that should be only watched at the old school drive-ins. But well worth checking out when revisiting the old 50s and 60s creature/monster flicks as I give it 2 stars.

 

She (DVD) – Some years after a nuclear war a goddess rules over women and her name is ‘She’. ‘She’ is played by the cool actress Sandhal Bergman who comes in contact with two men who are in search for the one’s sister who was captured by a tribe called ‘The Norks’. ‘She’ allows the men to stay alive helps them search for Tom’s sister but along the way must fight mutants, vampires, a warlock, and eventually ‘The Norks’. ‘The Norks’ look like extras from the film ‘The Warriors’ but great villains for this fantasy/apocalyptic film. What’s weird about the film was it was finished in 1982 but not released in the U.S. until late 1985. It got a release in several countries during that three year period with the U.S. being last. I give this weird fantasy film 2 stars.

 

I Survived a Zombie Holocaust (DVD) – Another fun oddity from New Zealand where a zombie outbreak happens during filming of a low budget zombie film ‘Tonight They Come’. But it all centers on Wes. It is Wes’s first day on the job as he just graduated film school and has big expectations. Wes quickly learns there are a lot of bitter people behind the scenes of making this flick but Wes also soon learns there is such thing as real zombies. Soon the real zombies begin to feast on cast and crew and all Wes can do is try to survive the onslaught of horror as long as the crew doesn’t kill him first? My favorite scene has to be the special effects guy shoots himself in the face when he jumps out to fight the zombies head on. This is after he begins shooting real people and not the zombies. Horror films from New Zealand never get old as I give this treat 3 stars.

 

The Darkness (On Demand) – Kevin Bacon and his family go on a camping trip to the Grand Canyon only for their autistic son to find an ancient place in the mountains by accident. He picks up these ancient stones and takes them home. These ancient stones when removed from their resting place can open a doorway to something called, ‘The Darkness’. They are demons that live in the shadows and can drive people mad until they die or just steal their souls. Either way you are screwed if you have opened up the doorway. The autistic kid uses the stones every day and talks to his new friend Jenny. Soon his room is fire, a snake attacks grandma, a dog attacks his sister, mom starts drinking again, some weird hokey shit is going down people. In the end I see the film as Poltergeist-lite with an autistic child. Good cast, the film doesn’t insult you like some paranormal films, it will find its audience as I give it 2 ½ stars.

me

Any comments or questions please send to grossmoviereview@verizon.net or www.facebook.com/grossmoviereviews . Remember folks always support your local independent movie theater, independent video store, and independent filmmakers! It will keep horror alive………

You can always visit and see some past reviews, independent film news, or me ranting at: www.grossmoviereviews.com !!!

Don’t forget you can also hear Kyle Poling and me talking about horror flicks on a weekly basis on the Bloodbaths and Boomsticks podcast at: www.bloodbathspodcast.blogspot.com/

Plus you can always go to the greatest T-shirt place online or if you are in Texas visit the store of “Fast Custom Shirts” where T-shirt Joe is the only place you should purchase your horror T-shirts: Go to www.fastcustomshirts.com for details.

Gross Movie Reviews #381

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Gross Movie Reviews #381

 Mummy

Mummy Sleepover Massacre (DVD) – Where has this horrible greatness been hiding at? Well first off it was written, edited, and directed by the one and only Henrique Couto… when he was like 15! Within minutes of me posting of this film being in my possession, Henrique wanted to know how I got it. Second off, with a title like this you knew this movie would find its way to me just because. It has been long out of print but that didn’t stop me from enjoying the horrible glory of a toilet paper covered mummy murdering teenagers at a slumber party. There isn’t a whole lot to say about it besides that. Is it bad… yes? Did I enjoy this gem from an unknown filmmaker (2003) at the time who is a big deal now… Hell yeah!!! Henrique understand this film has found its rightful place in my movie collection where it belongs as I give it 1 ½ out of 4 stars. But it is one the best god damn 1 ½ star movies ever just for the title and the toilet paper mummy! And Henrique, thank you.

 

The Conjuring 2 (Theater) – After the events of the first film the Warrens find themselves investigating the famous home in Amityville in 1976. During a séance Lorraine finds herself defending herself against an evil she has never experienced before but not a part of the famous Amityville house. Once home she makes Ed promise her they take a break because she has seen his death. But this evil spirit takes residence in a single mom of four’s house in London 1977. The Warrens are called in by the church just to observe for three days. When they arrive one child is completely terrorized and the other three kids and mom scared for their lives with no one to turn too. After video proof that it was faked or supposedly fake, the Warrens rush back to the home to help the family from this beyond evil spirit that refuses to go away. Amazing flick again horror fans. I am not much into paranormal movies but the two ‘Conjuring’ flicks I have absolutely loved and glad they exist. I give the sequel 4 stars and forgive them for even thinking ‘Annabelle’ was a good idea. Wait a minute… there may be a sequel to ‘Annabelle’? Don’t fuck with the formula based on true stories Hollywood! Just sayin…

 

Swamp Thing the Series: Volume Two (DVD) – This box set covers half of the third season as the third season had something like 50 episodes. Crazy, but what is really weird I must start my quest looking for this other box set as it seems to unavailable everywhere? But anyway after ignoring for a full season that Arcane sent a kid to South America news comes that Jim is alive sending his mom on many trips to South America looking for him. Sadly no help from Swamp Thing but that doesn’t stop Alec Holland from getting a new love interest that during an episode Mr. Swamp Thing eats rare lizard eggs that gets him high and dream about his new girl. They do kill off Kari Wuhrer’s character quickly and have a few episodes where Swamp Thing and Arcane must help out each other. Overall its cheesy television but worth checking out if it pops up on Netflix, On Demand, Hulu, etc., as I give it 2 ½ stars.

Survivors

Survivors (DVD/Vimeo) – Those filmmakers in the UK refuse to let the zombie genre go away as this latest entry into the genre takes a dramatic and political take on it. Medea is a medical testing joint that is funded by the government and recently some human patients have gone missing. With little to go on Kate and her cameraman Duke try to get the inside scoop on what is going on and see if the rumors are true about a new secret weapon, “Zombies”. While investigating the experiments have worked and the patients have escaped causing a shitload of chaos in the world. From here the film focuses on Kate before and after the chaos flipping back and forth. After Duke takes off looking for help Kate continues on trying to survive only to meet Paul, who just so happens to be sent by the government to find out what actually does Kate know? The film is a dramatic, classic, smart take on an overloaded zombie genre which for me never gets old as I give the film 2 ½ out of 4 stars. The film has the suspense of another recent zombie movie I liked called, ‘State of Emergency’. For more on this film check out: www.continuummotionpictures.com and www.mctvnetwork.com .

 

Just Desserts: The Making of Creepshow (Blu-ray) – A Michael Felsher project that took a life of its own as it went from a special feature to a full-length documentary that can only be explained as an orgasmic explosion of amazingness about the legendary film ‘Creepshow’. The documentary covers everything of how it began to Tom Savini thinking it was Halloween for five months straight while being on set to make all sorts of creatures for the anthology. The film is almost timeless and has one of my favorite stories of horror in the segment called ‘The Crate’. The documentary has some great interviews with George Romero, Savini, Ed Harris and so on but also great stories about Stephen King and him being a kid at heart. The Blu-ray also has ‘Scream Greats’ Tom Savini video which was watched by many horror fans who grew up in the 80s but now has a commentary as well with Savini looking back at the video. This Blu-ray is a true nerd out of a disc as it has everything you could ever imagine about ‘Creepshow’ and for that I say thank you to Mr. Felsher as I give the Blu-ray 4 out of 4 stars but also it will be one of the best horror discs of 2016! Place your order now at www.synapse-films.com .

 

Blood Glacier (DVD) – A German horror film about a Climate Research Center high in the mountains and its occupants finding a strange blood red covered mountain one day and gone the next. But after a dog is bitten or prodded strange noises are heard and they get back to home base to examine the samples. The samples are no good or so they thought so they rush back up there the next day and it’s gone. Strange things are happening to the world since the glaciers are melting and this can be one of them where animals and bugs mutate then attack humans. It boils down to the German version of ‘The Thing’. It’s hard not to make the comparison but don’t let that stop you from enjoying this lesser known creature feature as I give it 3 stars.

 

Batman: The Dark Knight Returns Part 1 & 2 (DVD) – The 2012 animated feature stars the voice of Peter Weller as Batman where Batman is now 70 and been out of the spotlight for ten years. But since his disappearance Gotham has gotten worse from a whole new slew of criminals called “The Mutants”. Bruce Wayne tired of retirement and Commissioner Gordon about to retire decides it is time for Batman to return and restore order in Gotham. But this isn’t your Saturday morning Batman cartoon folks as not only does Batman kill some people or criminals, but “The Joker” does also during his return to society. Pretty violent and the story of how Batman fakes his death so he can continue teaching young people to take care of Gotham from the shadows. I give the flick 3 stars.

 

Any comments or questions please send to grossmoviereview@verizon.net or www.facebook.com/grossmoviereviews . Remember folks always support your local independent movie theater, independent video store, and independent filmmakers! It will keep horror alive………

You can always visit and see some past reviews, independent film news, or me ranting at: www.grossmoviereviews.com !!!

Don’t forget you can also hear Kyle Poling and me talking about horror flicks on a weekly basis on the Bloodbaths and Boomsticks podcast at: www.bloodbathspodcast.blogspot.com/

Plus you can always go to the greatest T-shirt place online or if you are in Texas visit the store of “Fast Custom Shirts” where T-shirt Joe is the only place you should purchase your horror T-shirts: Go to www.fastcustomshirts.com for details.

Gross Movie Reviews #380

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Gross Movie Reviews #380

 

Howl (DVD) – In the middle of Somewhere, UK, passengers are taking a train at night to get to their destination. Problem… train breaks down in the middle of highly wooded area that we later find out has a history of weird shit happening but never substantiated? But driver gets out checking out the problem only to be attacked by something. Two train workers check it out not finding the driver and debating with the several passengers on what they should do. Finally they leave the train only to find the remains of the driver and now something is chasing them back to the train. They are forced to defend themselves as this wolf man like creature is attacking the train trying to eat everyone inside! A fun werewolf flick with lots of blood and guts and I give it 3 stars.

 

Jaws of Satan (DVD) – An early 80s killer animal flick that involves a King Cobra escaping from a train and causing other snakes in the area to attack humans. All because the King Cobra is Satan himself according to the local priest! A possessed snake holding a community hostage is great stuff horror fans and a must watch as I give it 3 stars!

 

The Vatican Tapes (DVD) – A woman named Angela becomes possessed on her 25th birthday and the church gets involved. A special division of the Vatican gets involved after investigating the supposedly possession and tries exorcise the demon from the young woman’s body before it completely takes control. A little more interesting than most of the PG-13 possession films that have flooded the horror genre as I give the film 2 ½ stars.

 

Amityville Death House (DVD) – The story begins with Eric Roberts doing voiceover telling a story about a witch using the ‘Book of the Dead’ as a means to enter present day. Pay attention as you will notice the ‘Book of the Dead’ is: A) The Evil Dead DVD Necronomicon and B) its upside down. Anyway, present day and Tiffany and college friends are stopping by to visit grandma. Well grandma lives in the old Wilmont’s house that was the house to Abigail the witch during the 1800s. Locals always believed witches lived in the home for years. Now the home is shunned by the community even though Grandma Raymond lives there. Tiffany use to spend her summers there until grandpa died and since then hasn’t been back. But now she is back and weird shit begins to happen and six people need to die for Abigail the witch to come into present day. And only in a Polonia Brothers film you would hear the line, “You look like you had a dozen tits?” It’s true if you watch the film she did look like that… Tiffany I mean. Make-up effects from Brett Piper and Anthony Polonia, Fred Olen Ray as an executive producer and Eric Roberts involved with a great looking poster comes off as a slight misfire than classic. I expected more but hey it does have Amityville in the title so I give it 2 stars.

2015-flesh-for-the-inferno-movie-poster

Flesh for the Inferno (DVD) – A film written by the legendary Michael Varrati begins March 11, 1999, at St. Christopher Middle School. A priest has raped a boy and the boy told four nuns about it. They choose to confront the priest and things go bad and next thing you know they are renouncing god as they are bricked up in the basement. Years later… June 2, 2015, a youth group and its leader show up to clean and fix up the old school for the weekend but they are warned it’s a bad day according to the caretaker. Once the cleaning begins the nuns return causing death and chaos inside the walls of this holy place. Gore, ugly nuns, and a little reminder for me at least of ‘The Unholy’ and ‘The Convent’. A fun and gritty low budget horror movie worth seeking out fans as I quite enjoyed it as I give it 3 out of 4 stars. This is the type of horror film I believe needs to make a comeback to the cinemas?

 

Black Sabbath (DVD) – Boris Karloff tells tales of terror in this early 60s horror film that even has Karloff playing a vampire in the last tale of terror. Think of Karloff as the early Cryptkeeper. Found this flick a little dull at times but sure there are some older people that would tell me to fuck off just for saying that as I give this film 2 stars.

 

Swamp Thing: The Series Volume One (DVD) – Yes folks, I am the weirdo that owns this box set but this set actually contains season one and two. The third season for unknown reasons right now is 50 some episodes! It was USA network in the early 90s before they knew what programs were being placed on the channel. Dick Durock returns as the big green guy who pretty much saves a kid named Jim for several episodes before he is shipped off to South America and now has to deal with his older brother Will. The series centers on the struggle between Dr. Arcane and Swamp Thing and the surrounding swamp land. With each story being wrapped up in 23 minutes and everyone including his mom forgetting Jim from the first season was shipped to South America by Arcane. An odd and quirky take on the cult comic book hero but no worse than the ‘Friday the 13th Series’ that was about cursed objects not Jason Voorhees. I look forward tracking down the rest of the episodes but until then hopefully we can get a movie or TV series that gives this interesting character some respect? I give it 2 stars.

Werewolves

Werewolves in Heat (DVD) – Lance Polland and company make a movie that seemed to be a lost film from the early 90s Troma catalog that even includes Ron Jeremy as a pimp named ‘Chancho’. The story centers around three friends leaving the friendly confines of L.A. for the sex, drugs, and party of the desert. Once at their rental house they proceed to the local bar to place flyers for their party and buy some whores. But these just any whores… Let’s remember Ron Jeremy aka Chancho is pimping out the best ever. The three friends are so excited for the women and their party doesn’t know until it is too late when the women/werewolves show up and start a bloodbath once horny! Everyone may get laid but it all ends in death as these women have embraced being werewolves. Hell, we even get werewolf vision which reminds me a lot of the same thing in ‘Howling 7: New Moon Rising’ (a sub-par sequel in the series). Mr. Polland accomplished in giving horror and Troma fans a low budget raunchy gem that makes you reminisce about old school Troma films? I give the flick 3 out of 4 stars. More about the film can be found at: www.facebook.com/werewolvesinheat .

 

Any comments or questions please send to grossmoviereview@verizon.net or www.facebook.com/grossmoviereviews . Remember folks always support your local independent movie theater, independent video store, and independent filmmakers! It will keep horror alive………

You can always visit and see some past reviews, independent film news, or me ranting at: www.grossmoviereviews.com !!!

Don’t forget you can also hear Kyle Poling and me talking about horror flicks on a weekly basis on the Bloodbaths and Boomsticks podcast at: www.bloodbathspodcast.blogspot.com/

Plus you can always go to the greatest T-shirt place online or if you are in Texas visit the store of “Fast Custom Shirts” where T-shirt Joe is the only place you should purchase your horror T-shirts: Go to www.fastcustomshirts.com for details.

 

Gross Movie Reviews #379

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Gross Movie Reviews #379

 Sorceress

Sorceress (Blu-ray) – Wynorski fans will be so happy to find out that finally the uncensored version of this film has been released to Blu-ray. A project that had Wynorski fans talking for years on whether there was an actual uncensored version or not and had them scouring the conventions for the uncensored release. But it’s here kids in all its uncensored beautiful, crisp, clean glory and has two entertaining commentaries. But more on that later… And for those who do not know the title of this Wynorski/Fred Olen Ray joint, it was also under the title ‘Temptress’ which has a sequel. The film stars Linda Blair and Julie Strain as witches. Strain’s character Erica will stop at nothing to help her husband Larry moves up the corporate ladder. So of course she gets naked and turns to witchcraft. Fucks up Amelia’s (Linda Blair) husband but Erica’s husband is not happy and Erica falls to her death! Pissed off, Amelia turns to witchcraft for revenge. It all ends with the ‘Wisdom’ ending. (A mid-80s film I blame for starting a chain reaction in low and big budget films where in the end nothing happened. Look it up it stars Emilio Estevez and Demi Moore.) The film is okay but the main course or reason you need this for your collection isn’t the movie itself but possibly one of my favorite commentaries of all-time is on this new disc. The first commentary is Jim Wynorski but the second commentary is Wynorski and special effects guru Tom Savini. Within five minutes the commentary derails into a comedy of Wynorski forgetting about what’s going on screen and trying to answer Savini’s questions which are absolutely hilarious. A few of Savini’s questions and comments: Is Julie Strain a man? He questions today’s porn and compares it to Wynorski’s films. He admits not owning a Wynorski film. Questions if there was ever a plot to the film? Witches don’t make any money. And now Wynorski and Savini will be making a film called, “Blummy”! Kids, this commentary alone makes this Blu-ray well worth being in your collection. I give the film 2 out of 4 stars but the commentaries and package 4 out of 4 stars as Synapse Films is brilliant for putting this together. You can purchase the Blu-ray at www.synapse-films.com .

 

X-men: Apocalypse (Theater) – The last film had me so excited what the future holds for the franchise and they did not disappoint. Now that they have rebooted, refigured with a younger cast it allows the filmmakers to really get into some geeky fun stories of the X-men universe! This time around the original mutant named ‘Apocalypse’ has awakened and needs his four horsemen to take control back from the humans. He was the original and wants Professor X to add to his mass of mutant powers that he has absorbed over the years. Just like ‘Captain America: Civil War’ everyone gets equal amount of time except Logan or should I say “Weapon X” but has a memorable scene to push forth another later storyline. Fun summer movie stuff as I give the flick 3 ½ stars. Bring me the X-23 film damn it!

 

 

The Unborn (DVD) – There is several films with this title but this film is from 1991 that was under the Roger Corman wing. Brooke Adams plays a woman who is having trouble getting pregnant and goes see James Karen because he has the reputation of helping women getting pregnant. But of course it’s James Karen and he is evil and oh yeah he just happens to be experimenting with the unborn babies trying to make them better. Everything goes well at first as Adams character sees other expecting mothers who went to the same clinic but shit hits the fan when the mothers begin to change and kill their spouses/girlfriends and the babies want blood! A fun movie to show to people who are about to have a kid as I give it 2 ½ stars.

 

The Unborn II (DVD) – The sequel came out three years later direct-to-video again from the Roger Corman wing where a woman is tracking down the babies that were started at the clinic from the first film. She knows they are evil and fucked up and the film gets rolling quickly as she shoots a kid in a playground. The film becomes a little boring at times but nothing like a crazy woman tracking down kids and killing them even if it means killing them in the hospital bed after just being born! Lots of blood splatters kids as I give the film 2 stars.

 

Killer Elite (DVD) – Based on a true story during 1980/1981 where a special ops guy (Jason Statham) gets out of the business until a year later his mentor (Robert DeNiro) was taken hostage because of a high priced job. The reason is six million dollars and he try to run because it’s all about oil that some secret UK guys want but don’t want the public to know. So time for Statham to go kick ass on both sides and get his mentor back so he can retire again. I give the film 2 ½ stars.

 

Vampire Bats (DVD) – So some mutated bats have eaten everything in the bayou of Louisiana and now out to feast on the local population. Lucy Lawless plays a college biology professor who knows about bats and wants to capture a few so she can determine how and why they mutated before they feast on the whole community. When it comes to killer bat movies this movie is pretty generic and for the most part I can see why this film doesn’t pop up any horror website or channel’s radar as I give it 1 star.

 

Rock & Rule (DVD) – An animated film released in 1983 that failed miserably from lack of promotion and several other things that was made to be on par with ‘Heavy Metal’. But I believe its four years in the making maybe didn’t help it either but well worth searching out if you love animation and music being smashed together. The war has happened, all humans are gone, and out of the ashes mutants and animals have taken humans place on earth. Meanwhile an evil dude ‘Mok’ is the greatest music artist ever and he is looking for that “voice” to unlock a portal to another dimension. He finds in a singer named ‘Angel’ and steals her away from her band to bring a demon forth to kill everyone! Cheap Trick, Iggy Pop, Earth, Wind, and Fire are some of the bands on the soundtrack. Cool film to watch but not on the same level as ‘Heavy Metal’ for me at least as I give the picture 2 ½ stars.

 

Lady Death (DVD) – A 2004 animated movie to the cult comic book series about the daughter of Lucifer. Set in the 15th century and Hope is pure at heart but does not know about her father until it’s too late when the locals show up to kill him in the name of god. When he shows his true self and escape they snatch her up to burn at the stake. When burning she says the prayer so her soul can be with her true love but instead is tortured in hell. She escapes into the realm of hell and learns she may be still pure of heart but is Lucifer’s daughter and has unimaginable powers that begin to change her and fill her with rage towards her father. She trains, gets big boobs, a big sword, two werewolf looking dogs, and an army and they attack Lucifer! Was never a fan of the comic book series and the movie itself wasn’t truly exciting but I am sure there is some fans out there that didn’t know an animated film existed as I give it 2 stars.

 

Any comments or questions please send to grossmoviereview@verizon.net or www.facebook.com/grossmoviereviews . Remember folks always support your local independent movie theater, independent video store, and independent filmmakers! It will keep horror alive………

You can always visit and see some past reviews, independent film news, or me ranting at: www.grossmoviereviews.com !!!

Don’t forget you can also hear Kyle Poling and me talking about horror flicks on a weekly basis on the Bloodbaths and Boomsticks podcast at: www.bloodbathspodcast.blogspot.com/

Plus you can always go to the greatest T-shirt place online or if you are in Texas visit the store of “Fast Custom Shirts” where T-shirt Joe is the only place you should purchase your horror T-shirts: Go to www.fastcustomshirts.com for details.

Gross Movie Reviews #376

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Gross Movie Reviews #376

 

Cowboys vs. Dinosaurs (DVD) – Sometimes you wonder why these types of movies exist? Simply two things: One as long as I am alive I will find them and two I believe someone is stealing my dreams while I sleep or the government is uploading crap from my mind. Yes folks, call Mulder and Scully I think I am an X-file! Anyway, Eric Roberts shows up for a paycheck as a drunk local and Vernon Wells shows up as a badass as usual where he is trying to keep a mine going and escape dinosaurs in this small town. Local boy comes back home to small town Montana to find things have changed and not for the better. A mine explosion happens and dinosaurs are running loose eating the locals but Vernon wells and the local sheriff I trying to keep a lid on the multi-million dollar mining operation. Eventually local boy gets back on a horse and saves everyone but not before you will notice that if you are an old dude in this flick you have a hot girlfriend that is 20 years younger than your character… I give it 1 ½ stars, honestly it has Vernon Wells!

 

Yongary, Monster from the Deep (DVD) – Love Godzilla, enjoy random giant lizard movies, well you may enjoy bootleg Godzilla in this 1967 Korean B-movie? A mysterious earthquake happens and next thing you know a horned giant lizard starts fucking shit up. It’s the 60s and most likely this played constantly at the drive-in as I give it 2 stars.

 

The Orphan (VHS/DVD-R) – A weird and relatively unknown horror/thriller that was made in 1977. But what was weird and interesting was the film wasn’t released until late 1979 and was actually titled ‘Friday the 13th: The Orphan’? But some money changed hands and that was movie history as we all know the slasher genre was sent into overdrive! But the story revolves a young boy named David whose parents die so he must go live with his old Aunt Martha and oh by the way the film is set in the 1920s. David slowly goes nuts and begins praying to a stuffed Monkey in a shed and old Aunt Martha drives him into madness which gives the film a very dark ending. I give the film 2 stars.

Dark

Dark (Vimeo/DVD) – A new low budget flick from the writer and directors of such independent projects ‘Gut’ and ‘Phobia’ which I enjoyed immensely but also executive produced by Joe Dante so you got my attention. The film is set during a blackout in 2003 New York City where Whitney Able plays Kate aka bootleg version of Jennifer Jason Leigh which is always a good thing in my book. Kate is lost in life… She is not sure about her girlfriend, her life, and so on but then the blackout happens when her girlfriend goes out of town for the weekend. Kate is alone and decides to head to the bar to make some bad decisions. Soon she finds herself being followed and returns home only to darkness. This is where the story gets really weird because it raises the questions of did it happen, is she imagining it all, and did she even go to the bar? Her world unravels in this dramatic and beautiful world of weirdness I enjoyed. ‘Dark’ cannot be labeled a horror film as so much a thriller as you know you are getting something different from these guys involved with the project as they make projects that don’t fit into one genre. Think outside of the box in so many words as I give ‘Dark’ 3 out of 4 stars. Want to know about the film go check out: www.darkthefilm.com .

 

Future Hunters (VHS/YouTube) – Robert Patrick’s first flick from and 1986 and the Philippines where he (Slade) and his girlfriend are entrusted with the “Spear of Destiny” by a time traveling dude named Matthew. Matthew is from 2025 after the holocaust and believes this is the only way he can save his world and stop the holocaust from happening. So Matthew travels back in time to 1986 and meets Slade. But evil is coming and it’s in the form of Nazis and the Nazi version of Playboy Buddy Rose! The couple goes looking for Professor Hightower who is the key to helping them saving the world. But along the way they run into crazy kung fu people, amazon tribes on horseback, car chases, explosions, cave full of midgets, amazon women, and gators! After several ordeals Slade and his girlfriend make a deal with the sledgehammering midgets in the cave and find the rightful place for the “Spear of Destiny” and save the world. If it helps make this film any better it is from the same dude that gave us ‘Wheels of Fire’ as I give the flick 3 stars.

 

Sugar Hill (DVD) – A young lady named Sugar wants vengeance after her man is killed by gangsters who want his club. But she just isn’t down for any vengeance; she wants to get medieval on their gangster asses and recruits the likes of Baron Samedi or Baron Zombi if you are a yinzer like me. And Baron Samedi has zombies that are former slaves that died on their way to America. A fun 70s zombie flick you must add to your collection if you haven’t already as I give it 3 ½ stars.

The-Path-to-Pet-Sematary-Movie-Poster

 

Unearthed & Untold: The Path to Pet Sematary (DVD/Vimeo) – These days it seems a lot of documentaries are being made about horror films and such. Some deserve it? ‘Pet Sematary’ deserved it for sure for its impact on the horror genre. Honestly horror movie fans it was one of the better book to film adaptions of King’s. The Stephen King story that was brought to life by director Mary Lambert had a long journey and interesting one. The film came at the end of the “Slasher Era” and no studio wanted it to be made mainly because of the kid death in the story/script/movie. But with a strike looming at the time Mary Lambert and others took advantage of this and the rest was film history. The documentary takes a very in-depth look how it got from book to film but also how it’s one of King’s darkest books that scared him when he first wrote it. The filmmakers tracked down everyone that had anything to do with the film and they share stories of how the production got to Maine instead of California but what it meant to the small town Maine residents especially being a Stephen King movie. Plus the interview with all the cast members involved sharing their stories of on and off set makes this one the best and interesting horror documentaries of recent times. I believe it was crucial having Mako Hughes talk about his experience and what he actually remembers of the project to make this the perfect documentary for ‘Pet Sematary’ fans. The film did win “Best Documentary” at the Rhode Island International Horror Film Festival in 2014 which I know why and give it 4 out of 4 stars. For more info on the project and its upcoming release check out: Official Store: http://shop.terrorfilms.net/ , Official Trailer Link: https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=fnP7swXKQXo, Official Facebook Page: https://www.facebook.com/UnearthedandUntold, Terror Films Website: www.terrorfilms.net .

 

Voodoo Island (DVD) – A great late 50s b-horror film starring Boris Karloff as a man who debunks: ghosts, demons, and present day myths. He leads an expedition to a tropical island where a millionaire wants to build his best vacation hotel yet. But surveyors that were sent there before disappeared and the lone survivor is in a zombie like trance. Once there weird stuff begins to happen like food going bad, boat doesn’t work, and plants just happen to eat people! Fun stuff and it looks like old Boris Karloff had a lot fun with this project as I give it 3 stars.

 

Any comments or questions please send to grossmoviereview@verizon.net or www.facebook.com/grossmoviereviews . Remember folks always support your local independent movie theater, independent video store, and independent filmmakers! It will keep horror alive………

You can always visit and see some past reviews, independent film news, or me ranting at: www.grossmoviereviews.com !!!

Don’t forget you can also hear Kyle Poling and me talking about horror flicks on a weekly basis on the Bloodbaths and Boomsticks podcast at: www.bloodbathspodcast.blogspot.com/

Plus you can always go to the greatest T-shirt place online or if you are in Texas visit the store of “Fast Custom Shirts” where T-shirt Joe is the only place you should purchase your horror T-shirts: Go to www.fastcustomshirts.com for details.

Reichsfuhrer SS is now available on Amazon!!!

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http://www.amazon.com/Reichsfuhrer-SS-David-Stewart-III/dp/B01EKCXIGG

SS

The Reichsfuhrer-SS Heinrich Himmler, Adolf Hitler’s most loyal henchman meets Erebus, the gatekeeper of Hell!

Review from (Gross Movie Reviews):

Reichsfuhrer SS (DVD/Vimeo) – The same independent filmmaker that gave us “Operation: Nazi Zombies” a few years back is back at again with another Nazi film that involves Heinrich Himmler on about a $25,000 budget. The film is about how Himmler became a murdering Nazi bastard and meets the gatekeeper of hell after his suicide in 1945. While with the gatekeeper of hell Himmler goes through his past of what started him on his incredible murderous path. The crew does an amazing job with costumes, use of locations, décor, and even the gatekeeper of hell. If I didn’t tell you the budget of this flick most viewers would guess that the budget would be more like $200, 000 or $300,000 because of how authentic things look. The crew, the actors, and filmmaker go all out in this bad ass entertaining film about Himmler getting what he deserved in the end. I love watching independent movies that pay attention to detail when it comes to pictures, flags, etc. when movies are set in a certain time period and they should be proud of this project. I give this flick 3 out of 4 stars and more about this new release can be found at: https://www.facebook.com/RFSSMovie?fref=ts .

Gross Movie Reviews #373

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Gross Movie Reviews #373

 

By Tim Gross

 President

President Wolfman (DVD) – The title alone is what reeled me into wanting to watch this gem of a horror flick. But when I opened it and started to read the sleeve and began watching the film to my amazement the project was entirely stock footage of public domain titles and major parts are from the 1973 film ‘The Werewolf of Washington’. This 1973 film stars Dean Stockwell who was the go between for Sam and Ziggy from the ‘Quantum Leap’ show. But anyway the film is edited footage with new voiceovers, music, etc. Amazing work from Mike Davis and crew to craft a horror movie about president John Wolfman who tries to spend more time with his son Bobby and is attacked by a diseased coyote on a camping trip! From there mysterious murders are happening in the nation’s capital and that is the least of their problems as the Chinese continue their takeover of America. At one point President Wolfman has surgery that turns him into a hippie but reverses to a werewolf again. John Wolfman is also being pushed by Congress to sell out to the Chinese as they all will own a skyscraper in New York City. A fun horror film and a truly amazing accomplishment in editing by all involved. There were several parts of the film that I could not stop laughing at as I give this fun creation 3 ½ out of 4 stars. You can find this and many other fine films at www.wildeyereleasing.com .

 

Lumberjack Man (DVD) – First, did you know there was still an “After Dark Horror Fest”? Second, this film truly points out there are some lame slasher film ideas out there… But that didn’t stop me from watching Michael Madsen try to play a doctor who runs to Big Timber Woods to warn teenagers and forest rangers of the demon that lurks in the woods! Apparently every thirty years since 1892 a demon appears in the woods and kills whoever with his pancakes? If that isn’t enough to entice you to watch it, how about the demon can be killed by maple syrup?! I swear I am not making this shit up these types of films just seem to find their way to me. But I did thoroughly enjoy a scene where a teenager is thrown against a tree and then bent into several uncomfortable positions. I give this mess of a horror film 1 ½ stars.

 

I Saw the Devil (DVD) – Byung-Hun Lee aka bad ass dude that has shown up in recent action films and takeover or over shadows the stars in the film plays a bad ass in this film. But this isn’t just any type of action/horror weirdo fucked up flick? No, no, no Mr. Lee plays a character whose pregnant wife is killed by some nasty serial killer and for revenge wants to capture the man an torture him. Then repeat, torture, and then repeat, until innocent bystanders are now being killed in the process. But it’s one man’s quest to make the murderer to feel his pain. One fucked up and amazing film as I could not look away waiting to see what would happen next. I give this fun family flick 4 stars.

 

House (DVD) – Michael Madsen and most of ‘The Devil’s Rejects’ cast fuck with two couples who just happen to be stuck at an old house off of a back road. The cast is great, the plotline is pretty good but sometimes no household Hollywood types give this type of horror movie a grittiness that is memorable for the long run? For me it comes off more like some of our favorite celebrities were collecting a paycheck instead of being a part of something really awesome… I give the film 2 stars but sorry folks no William Katt, Richard Moll, or Norm from ‘Cheers’.

AMERICASDEADLIESTRELNEWS

America’s Deadliest Home Video (DVD) – Apparently for the first time in 25 years this S.O.V. film is available again. As described on the inner sleeve it is the first “found-footage film” and it stars Danny Bonaduce. Between the inner sleeve and the two commentaries on the disc it is full of crazy information about this very rare feature. The stories about its making are amazing and just made the viewing experience that much better as I sat down and watched Doug played by Danny Bonaduce film everything going on around him. Doug is obsessed with filming everything especially now his wife of two years is found cheating on him. So Doug decides to jump into the mini-van and travels the US to film stuff. He eventually comes across three criminals simply known as “The Clint Dryer Gang”. Doug finds the three and films them pushing a car off of a cliff. They notice Doug and they take him captive. Unsure of killing him or not, Clint comes up with the idea of Doug filming all their criminal activity. From there Doug slowly finds himself a part of the gang and being filmed trying to hold up a place until he is shot. As authorities close in they turn on each other in a bloody climax. Not a horror film but easily a S.O.V. collector’s dream for this to be available again. Great stuff, interesting concept for when it was made (early 90s), and so happy Camp Motion Pictures/Alternative Cinema makes a project like this available again. I give this rare gem 3 out of 4 stars and can be found at www.alternativecinema.com .

 

The Outing (DVD-R/You Tube/DVD) – A lesser talked about horror film released in 1987 that I remember watching as a teenager on Skinamax. What makes this an interesting horror film it may be the first killer genie slasher film? Also the film was once released under the title “The Lamp”. But no one is sure if that version has the extra twenty minutes that was originally cut from the film before it had a short run at the theaters. Anyway the film begins with a mysterious death in 1893, Galveston, Texas, then to present day. In present day (!986/1987) three so-called thieves break into a woman’s home and try to steal the lamp for money but never make it out the door. The three are murdered by an unseen force from the lamp. From there the lamp is sent to a museum in Houston, Texas. Where a dude that is studying it has a daughter who gets a little too hands on with the lamp and becomes possessed by the Jinn and next thing you know she and friends stay the night after a field trip. Bad move folks, as the Jinn have a field day of killing teenagers off in various odd scenarios.  I give this lesser known genie horror film 2 ½ stars but at least you know ‘Wishmaster’ perfected this formula eventually in the 90s.

pi day

Pi Day Die Day (DVD/Vimeo) – Not all the holidays have been taken or obscure ones or wait not sure if this is an actual day to be celebrated? But for the movie sake and for me just enjoying another random independent slasher “Pi Day” exists. March 14th to be exact and high school students that have a connection with a shy girl named Gabriele are being murdered by a mysterious killer. Never mind the principal played by Ari Lehman is unsure on how to help the student body because the pie eating contest on “Pi Day” has been canceled because of the murders. Meanwhile the popular girls can’t believe Gabriele has found a guy and shows up to their popular party where one person’s head explodes from the beer keg… Great inventive kill! The film has its good and bad moments but I got to congratulate Michael E. Cullen II for giving me another obscure holiday horror film. Now I am not sure if the rest of the horror movie watching world is weird like me and will accept this film like this but I say “Bravo!” I give the independent horror film 2 ½ out of 4 stars. Find out more at www.pidaydieday.com .

Zombiefied

Zombiefied (DVD) – Finally I was able to sit down and watch the sequel to one of my favorite independent films ever ‘Death Metal Zombies’. No doubt Todd Jason Falcon Cook knew there had to be a sequel but it took him many years! It’s been 13 years since the outbreak of zombies that were reversed to human form after a cassette of a new song from ‘Living Corpse’ was played backwards. But Angel and Tommy still have nightmares and it all happens again as a mysterious person goes to the local metal club and throws in a CD called “Phase II” and all in the club become flesh eaters. Now it is once again up to Angel, Tommy, and friends to stop the zombies. Reverse them to human if possible and if not find out who this mysterious person in a Nixon mask is and how he is able to control the undead. Nowhere near as much fun as the 1995 flick ‘Death Metal Zombies’ but still has some cool zombie effects. Maybe too much time had passed between films, maybe the first just had that something special (chaos perhaps), but this sequel just doesn’t live up to the hilarious fun the original is and was as I give this flick 2 out of 4 stars. You can find out more about the film at www.zombiefiedmovie.com and www.facebook.com/zombiefiedmovie .

B documentary

B-Documentary (DVD) – Nick Charles for his first film chose to do a documentary about “how to make a film”. In doing that Mr. Charles traveled to meet and interview celebrities Lloyd Kaufman, H.G. Lewis, Bill Johnson, Lisa Gaye, D.J. Calvitto, Patrick Madcox, and Nurse Hatchet. With this Nick Charles gets these fine people to tell stories of “how they got started”, “keys to success”, “how to make a movie”, along with several other subjects that includes “digital vs film”. The movie isn’t so much a documentary as much as a perfect instructional guide for movie fans and filmmakers alike to hear what’s it like to make a movie or act in one. They all have sound advice and varying opinions which makes this film not just a must see but a must own for any horror movie or independent movie fan out there. Nick Charles did an amazing job first time out in the filmmaking world and now has my attention in what he does next. I personally wish him good luck. I give this wonderful project 4 out of 4 stars and more about it and where to purchase it can be found at www.officialdungeonfilms.com .

 

Any comments or questions please send to: GrossMovieReview@verizon.net, GrossMovieReview@aol.com or www.facebook.com/grossmoviereviews . Remember folks always support your local independent movie theater, independent video store, and independent filmmakers! It will keep horror alive………

You can always visit and see some past reviews, independent film news, or me ranting at: www.grossmoviereviews.com !!!

Don’t forget you can also hear Kyle Poling and me talking about horror flicks on a weekly basis on the Bloodbaths and Boomsticks podcast at: www.bloodbathspodcast.blogspot.com/

Plus you can always go to the greatest T-shirt place online or if you are in Texas visit the store of “Fast Custom Shirts” where T-shirt Joe is the only place you should purchase your horror T-shirts: Go to www.fastcustomshirts.com for details.

Next up, you can come by the vendor table I will be at for a book, shirt, or a movie at Cinema Wasteland April 1, 2, 3rd, 2016 in Strongsville, Ohio (for details: www.cinemawasteland.com) .

 

Gross Movie Reviews #372

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Gross Movie Reviews #372

 

By Tim Gross

 

The Barbarians (DVD) – This 1987 fantasy film and everything you could want? Ruggero Deodato directing, Richard Lynch as your villain, Michael Berryman as The Dirtmaster who trains these twins to be warriors, and a George Eastman appearance! A traveling circus is attacked by an evil bastard (Richard Lynch) who decides to take the princess aka the woman named Canary and the twins traveling with the circus. The twins are separated and trained to be warriors. When the twins grow up they are played by popular 80s muscle bound duo: Peter and David Paul. The twins are forced to fight each other but overcome the battle and help each other out to escape and get revenge. There is also a dragon, looks horrible but still a shit load of fun! I give the flick 3 ½ stars.

 

Chemical Peel (DVD) – A bachelorette party in the woods goes horribly wrong when the women go to sleep and wake up to a horrible fog outside of their cabin and a dead baby in the cabin. Things break down from there as they learn through static TV and radio that a train derailed not too far away and spilled a chemical that reacted causing mass evacuation. With the fog seeping in and the ladies learning the hard way to not use water it becomes a horrifying outcome. Great stuff folks, women turning on each other, characters you will hate right off the bat, and some beautiful disgusting gooey effects. So see who survives as I give the horror flick 3 stars.

 

Night of the Creeps 2 (DVD) – First off this film has nothing to do with the classic we all know and love. But what is weird this film from 2006 is an independent film that I know as ‘Zombie Town’. So how did it get the name blame Germany as it was sold there as a sequel somehow? But what makes this title even weirder is that I viewed a screener of the film ‘Zombie Town’ from MTI video over a decade ago and it was different from the version called, ‘Night of the Creeps 2’. Some of the information is sketchy but could not find out who exactly made this decision to retitle, rerelease, or even recut the film. Bottom line: I remember liking it just as “Zombie Town” and even comparing it or getting its influence from ‘Night of the Creeps’ but now pissed it somehow was marketed as a sequel. If you like killer leeches that turn small town folk into zombies this is right up your alley. So try not to condemn this film for a title change that was most likely out of the filmmaker’s hands… I believe I give it 3 ½ stars a decade ago. So hope your mind just didn’t blow up knowing this exists?

septicman11

Septic Man (DVD) – Same person that gave us ‘Monster Brawl’ gives us horror fans another weird tale of Canadian horror that stars Stephen McHattie (plays all-around creepy cool dudes), Julian Richards (best known as ‘Death’ on ‘Supernatural TV series’), and the great actress Molly Dunsworth (Hobo with a Shotgun). A town is being evacuated because sickness and disease is spreading through the town killing people but Jack chooses to stay behind. Jack is the ‘Septic Man’. He is offered a large sum of money to stay behind and solve the issue as he believes he knows why the water is contaminated?  But Jack isn’t ready for what happens after he fixes the problem and that is being trapped in the contaminated waste of the dead that is being dumped by a weirdo killer and his 7 foot brother who is afraid of him. The problem is fixed and the people come back but Jack is still trapped and going insane! Great weirdo ‘Slime City’ kinda vibe horror film as I give it 3 ½ stars.

 

Poltergeist (DVD/remake) – I was on the ropes about this flick mainly because the trailers made it look like another ‘Paranormal Activity’ clone. But I finally gave the remake a shot and was very surprised of how much it did not stray away from the 1982 original film. I didn’t hate it, I didn’t like it… The film really doesn’t take any chances to separate itself from the original. There isn’t a whole lot to say as much of it is a clone. I see this film as a useless chore in viewing it. I give it 2 stars. Hell, most people will forget this like ‘The Evil Dead’ remake.

Final Girls

Final Girls (DVD) – The only bad thing I can say about this film was I wish I seen this sooner as this will be one of my favorite horror films I have watched in 2016. Anyway a college girl, Max, is trying to get over her mother’s death still three years later. Her best friend’s brother works at a theater that is celebrating the cult horror slashers ‘Camp Bloodbath 1 and 2’. Max’s mother was famous for starring in the original and Max is asked to come be a part of the festival. She does an accident happens which starts the theater into a full on raging fire. Max and her friends cut through the movie screen to escape and find themselves in 1986 ‘Camp Bloodbath’ movie world. The non-stop slashing, blood, laughs are non-stop as Max and friends try to figure out how to fend off the movie’s killer Billy long enough to get back to the real world! This horror film is 4 stars all the way. It’s a slasher fan’s wet dream of a horror movie!

 

Manson Family Vacation (DVD) – A film about two brothers who are complete opposites and the older brother is adopted. The older brother was an artist but now has sold everything to travel the US and go on a road trip with his brother to everything Manson related before he goes off into the desert for his next job. The younger brother keeps trying to look out for him but knows he cannot control what he does not understand. It’s not a comedy, it’s not horror, and I don’t know if you could classify it as a road trip movie? But I do know I would like my 90 minutes back that I wasted on watching it. I give it 1 star.

 

The Editor (DVD) – A lot of the same people that were involved with ‘Father’s Day’ and ‘Manborg’ have yet another oddity where it seems to be set in early 80s Italy where an editor Rey Ciso was famous at one point but had a horrible accident. The accident took away four of his fingers off of his right hand. Now, treated like shit he is a suspect on the latest film he is editing as the stars are dropping like flies in bloody Eye-talian fashion. It is a beautifully absurd horror film that is a must see like the other two projects I have mention earlier in the review. I give the film 3 stars.

 

Spring (DVD) – A young man named Evan watches his mother die and there are not many friends around so he decides it is time to take a trip far, far away. Evan goes to Italy to drink with a couple of dudes and he doesn’t know but travels with anyway until he meets a mysterious woman. Almost immediately falling in love with her Evan finds a place to stay and goes into town just to run into her have dinner, coffee, anything just to have a relationship. But the woman with the dark past blows Evan’s mind when after they have sex she wants him to go away, she is now pregnant, and just happens to be some kind of ancient creature that needs stem cells to possibly stop her transformation. To put it simply: A Lovecraftian love story. Love the wide and far shots as you can see the beauty of the country in a lot of the scenes. And enjoyed the dialogue that keeps the film moving along but in the end I kept waiting for something more to happen… I give the film 2 stars.

Mold

Mold (DVD) – Its 1984, somewhere in the middle of the Arizona desert and scientists are experimenting with mold. They have developed a new strain of mold spores for the military that can kill everything and they are putting on a classified show for a select few. Things go okay until the new deadly mold infects the congressman. The underground bunker soon has the deadly mold spores spreading throughout the place. The group only has one chance if they can get controller agent and that isn’t even a given since it is untested. The group also finds out they are never allowed to leave as they are part of a bigger experiment to see how well the new deadly mold works. Pretty cool concept for an independent horror film but what makes worth the watch is its unbelievable gooey and gruesome over the top splatter effects! Gallons of green goo, exploding body parts make this a must for all gorehounds! I give the goo busting horror film 3 stars.

 

White Phantom (VHS) – I knew I was in for a treat when the Vidmark logo came up on this 1987 ninja flick. The film begins with some camo ninjas stealing weapons grade plutonium for the Sakura family who are powerful in China. From there we go right to the nightclub scene where we are introduce to our hero the ugly American (Jay Roberts Jr.) checking out a hot dancer. Roberts’s character is a mysterious man of sorts as he likes whores and playing basketball with the local kids when he isn’t signing baseballs as Babe Ruth. When that isn’t going down he would like to know more about this hot dancer at the night club who is just trying to repay a debt by getting info from the Sakura family about the weapons grade plutonium. The dancer is eventually killed by a ninja which of course sets up winner takes all (plutonium min this case) good ninja vs. bad ninja. And Bo Svenson collects a paycheck. I give the ninja film 2 ½ stars.

 

The Asphyx (YouTube) – A scientist who finds a blotch in a photograph and believes it is a ghost or possible soul leaving the body. He becomes obsessed with this find and wants it. The scientist believes this could be the link to immortality? An early 70s movie that is a good pick for a rainy Saturday afternoon that has that Hammer film feel to it as I give it 2 ½ stars.

 

Any comments or questions please send to: GrossMovieReview@verizon.net, GrossMovieReview@aol.com or www.facebook.com/grossmoviereviews . Remember folks always support your local independent movie theater, independent video store, and independent filmmakers! It will keep horror alive………

You can always visit and see some past reviews, independent film news, or me ranting at: www.grossmoviereviews.com !!!

Don’t forget you can also hear Kyle Poling and me talking about horror flicks on a weekly basis on the Bloodbaths and Boomsticks podcast at: www.bloodbathspodcast.blogspot.com/

Plus you can always go to the greatest T-shirt place online or if you are in Texas visit the store of “Fast Custom Shirts” where T-shirt Joe is the only place you should purchase your horror T-shirts: Go to www.fastcustomshirts.com for details.

Next up, you can come by the vendor table I will be at for a book, shirt, or a movie at Cinema Wasteland April 1, 2, 3rd, 2016 in Strongsville, Ohio (for details: www.cinemawasteland.com) .