Bloodbaths and Boomsticks do the Robert Ginty episode!

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This week we gather once again to talk about genre movies.  But this time we bring back our good, good friend Jon Cross of the After Movie Diner to talk about 3 Robert Ginty flicks and one episode of Murder She Wrote that he was in.  First let the incest fly as Robert Ginty and his sister (or at least her face) is after a giant diamond in WHITE FIRE.  Then as embarrassing as it is Kyle covers THE EXTERMINATOR as he watches it for the first time.  And then we have an episode of Murder She Wrote with Ginty and show favorite Stephen Macht from season 8 of the series.  And Lastly Ginty teams up with Cynthia Rothrock to kick ass in LADY DRAGON. Along with all this we read the news, and take your listener questions… but mostly we talk about how awesome it was that time Donald Pleasence chainsawed the entire bar in half in Race for the Yankee Zephyr.  So download this episode or your local bar may be next!!!  

http://bloodbathspodcast.blogspot.com/

Gross Movie Reviews #560

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Gross Movie Reviews #560

Final Impact (DVD) – While on my search for more “massacre” and “Amityville” flicks I came across this forgotten B-action gem from 1991 starring Lorenzo Lamas and the lovely Kathleen Kinmont. Lamas plays a miserable drunk Nick Taylor who use to be a kickboxing champion three years before but now just feels sorry for himself as he runs a strip club. A young and upcoming kid named Danny visits Taylor before his trip to Vegas to fight the long standing champion Jake. With only Nick’s help can this kid survive a fight with Jake? Fun direct-to-video stuff for the action movie ‘Carnosaur’ as I give it 2 ½ stars.

100 Degrees Below Zero (DVD) – As usual I tripped over another Asylum film that stars or I should wastes the talents of Jeff Fahey and John Rhys-Davies. This absurd flick deals with a few global events that cause mass panic as Paris begins to freeze! Majority of the film is Jeff Fahey and wife trying to get their rich twenty-something kids out of Paris before the next Ice Age. Sometimes Asylum, not making a movie can be a good idea also as I give this waste of my time 0 stars.

Crystal Lake Memories (Shudder) – Hey ‘Friday the 13th’ fans you have 6 ½ hours to waste and need Corey Feldman to guide you? Well here is your answer with this ultimate documentary that covers everything about the movie series as I give it 4 stars. (Which by the way those folks that dropped a hundred or $150 on the box set recently understand you still didn’t get the uncut version of Part 7: The New Blood?)

Reunion Massacre (Tubi) – This more recent Indy flick is also known as ‘Invitation to Die’. Not totally sure why this one had two different titles but anyhow it did fall under my “massacre” category so I know I had to watch it… at least once. A young woman gets an invite to her 10 year high school reunion and decides to go even though she is warned by a random old carnival fortune telling machine. Along the way and once in the structure she and others are stalked by a mysterious man in a clown mask! This film left me with so many questions:

A) Why did this young lady have to put up Halloween decorations before she went to this so-called reunion?

B) Is the clown mask from the ‘Camp Blood’ films which are a whole other bag of dumplings that I will get into more someday?

C) Was that the same Zoltar machine from ‘Big’ with Tom Hanks or were you just trying to find one that looked like it?

D) This home/building/school that is clearly under some kind of construction or destruction that was built in the middle of nowhere like the school for ‘Slaughter High’. How didn’t the whole movie take place there because that was a movie in itself?

E) Why does film like it was two different short films cobbled together because the second half of the film didn’t make much sense if the woman dreamt all of this but also the second half felt like it was tacked on or edited in just to justify feature length which is something that can be debated for years what justifies “feature length”?

Anyhow, wasn’t a big fan of the film as it left me with way too many questions but the honest big pet peeve was the ending as it goes out with a whimper as I give it 1 star (you get one star just for this random remote building and you made me invoke the great slasher film ‘Slaughter High’).

Hack-in-the-Box (Dropbox) – Holy mother F’N balls kids! This perfect short film from Zane Hershberger (see me in person to listen to me destroy his name with my Yinzer accent) has four bad ass women preparing to take on an unknown demonic force from a music box. To their horror what comes for them they couldn’t have prepared enough! As this old school blend of ‘Evil Dead’ and “Empire Pictures” project would make a young Sam Raimi blush then sign Zane to a multi-picture deal to his production company! What is Hollywood’s loss is the independent community’s gain because Zane, the actresses involved, and crew behind them should be all Hollywood bound as I give this project 4 out of 4 stars and the early front runner on my “Best of 2022 list”.

Body Melt (DVD) – If you don’t have enough “body horror” in your life there is this Australian gooey cult classic where people of Peebles Court, Homesville are actually an experiment. A man from Vimuville Health Farm grows a conscious and wants to warn the people they are guinea pigs for a new drug that speeds up human decomposition but was supposedly gonna be another health drug but goes horribly wrong. This man Ryan is killed but sets forth a series of events that baffles authorities as the residents of this area begin to die rapidly in horrible ways. Weird, Australian, gooey, yep, I am watching every time as I give it 3 stars. 

The Cellar (VHS/YouTube) – One of my favorite actors in Patrick Kilpatrick stars in this late 80s film where he and family (The Cashen family) moves into an old desert home that is on cursed land. Apparently back in the day Native Americans were pissed at white people and cursed the land where an evil spirit in a basement creature will devour any white people that live there. The young Cashen boy discovers this monster early on but no one believes him until he devises a plan to blow the fucker up! Nowhere near a perfect flick but it has a monster, cursed land, white people are assholes, and Patrick Kilpatrick so I will always check something like this out as I give it 2 stars.

Exterminator 2 (Blu-ray) A couple years go by and Richard Ginty still has the itch to kill all criminals and make sure people still remember ‘The Exterminator’! This time around a young street gang led by a very young looking Mario Van Peebles wants to take over the city’s drug trade and then take over the city itself by killing and raping one person at a time. But Ginty, a large garbage truck, and a flamethrower are fucking up every gang member that follows Peebles character. Not as good as the first film but still worth tracking down for a watch as I give it 2 ½ stars. Look for Irwin Keyes playing a small role as one of the gang members also. Note: I now believe Shout Factory has put out this title out on DVD in a 4-pack.Update: a review published in one of my older books (never posted on the website) so I am just reposting the review. But the big thing is the 4-pack from Shout Factory is out of print but there is a new Blu-ray for us fans. Great picture quality and a commentary but that is about it on any extras you ever gonna get for this Cannon Group sequel. The film doesn’t nearly have the impact of the original but the music is enough nostalgia to make you buy the Blu-ray and enjoy the Ginty one more time.

Death Train (DVD/TV movie/internet) – An Australian 70s TV flick that stars a pre-Mad Max Hugh Keays-Byrne as an insurance investigator who strolls into a small town to investigate Mr. Cook’s somewhat mysterious death. Supposedly Mr. Cook was killed by a train that hasn’t existed for decades. As Morrow finds answers he is actually finding himself asking more questions as all the residents of this small area talk about this ghost train. The flick is a fun light-hearted mystery that shows off the acting chops of Hugh Keays-Byrne as after you see this film it only makes sense why he was so perfect as “Toe-cutter” in one of the best post-apocalyptic films ever ‘Mad Max’. I give this fun mystery ghost train film 2 ½ stars.

Any comments please send to grossmoviereview@verizon.net or www.facebook.com/grossmoviereviews .

You can find all of my books at www.lulu.com just search for Gross Movie Reviews or Tim Gross there!

Plus you can always go to the greatest T-shirt place online or if you are in Texas visit the store of “Fast Custom Shirts” where T-shirt Joe is the only place you should purchase your horror T-shirts: Go to www.fastcustomshirts.com and support!

Gross Movie Reviews #559

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Gross Movie Reviews #559

Ten Little Indians (DVD) – This late 80s remake based on a play stars the late great Donald Pleasence, Paul Smith, and Frank Stallone are part of a group of people who go on an African safari courtesy of a Mr. Owen. Every person is there for good reason but only Mr. Owen knows but as they try to enjoy their trip they begin to be murdered one by one. Their only chance of survival is figuring out who is Mr. Owen? The film was okay as it had a good group of character actors but Frank Stallone as the lead seems to sink this relative unknown fourth version of the film as I can only give it 2 stars.

Major Grom: Plague Doctor (VOD) – First thing before you go into this Russian action flick is: don’t look at it as a superhero film as it has the elements but doesn’t behave like one. Second, I absolutely enjoyed the character of Igor Grom! Grom is a no non-sense cop who isn’t happy with the justice system but believes in what he does every day busting criminals. After a high-profile case where a rich young man gets off but is killed by a vigilante, Grom takes upon himself to investigate and bring down this person. But the pressure is on as the public is for the vigilante and Grom is looked down upon until he can find evidence to bring this person to justice. This fun Russian action film has a couple cool minor plot twists, a cool villain, and the last quarter of the film turns into ‘The Purge’. Again if you go into this not expecting a superhero film you will indeed enjoy this treat that needs more PR than it has gotten as I have to give it 3 ½ stars.

Atomic Eden (DVD) – This 2015 film has Fred Williamson putting together a team of mercs for a dangerous mission in Chernobyl. Their mission is to retrieve an old suitcase from a mining shaft that was actually a Nazi lair! Lorenzo Lamas shows up for a hot minute to not be pleased with the result when Williamson’s character returns. If you enjoy films with just scene after scene of martial arts you will most likely enjoy this mess or if you are me it felt like Nintendo’s Double Dragon game where the bad guys are unlimited but die the same three ways no matter what as I give this 2 stars.

Meathook Massacre 3: First Hunt (VOD) – After having two films about a cannibal killer named Bubba killing everyone out on a farm this film intends in trying to give some backstory. This film gives you the origins of Bubba’s family and how he got started in his murderous ways of hunting humans and using them as meat. I cringe watched my way through this as I hope it would get better but it didn’t as I have to give 0 stars.

White Fire (VHS/YouTube) – This foreign mid-80s flick has a brother/sister combo (Bo and Ingrid) stealing some diamonds from a diamond plantation but they run into a group of baddies that want in on their action? When Bo and Ingrid deceive them the baddies come to their adopted parents’ home and kill Ingrid. End of the movie right? Nope, as a woman comes upon Bo in a bar one evening and Bo and his partner convince her to get some plastic surgery to look like Bo’s sister! This “incest” of a plan is all about a bigger plan to go steal the mysterious “White Fire” diamond that was recently discovered. The movie can be dull at times but we get Robert Ginty fighting a dude with a chainsaw, a death by a band saw, and the great Fred Williamson collecting a paycheck as I give the film 1 ½ stars.

Lady Dragon (DVD) – Another Cynthia Rothrock film with Richard Norton where Cynthia plays a woman Kathy whose husband was murdered on her wedding day a year ago. Now Kathy is in Indonesia tracking the arms dealer who killed her husband only to have her life threaten before she can avenge her husband. So Kathy hangs out with non-verbal Grandpa to learn his fighting ways so she can kick this dude’s ass. Robert Ginty shows up long enough to be gunned down as part of the payback as I can only this action film 2 stars.

The Amityville Haunting (DVD) – This 2011 entry is just pure hot garbage as it tries to connect the original events of the home from the mid-70s to present day home in 2011 more than some past entries. Meet Tyler the young son with a camera that films all the weirdness that happens in the haunted home for this insulting found footage film. Twenty minutes in I knew watching this movie was a mistake so good luck as I give it 0 stars.    

Any comments please send to grossmoviereview@verizon.net or www.facebook.com/grossmoviereviews .

You can find all of my books at www.lulu.com just search for Gross Movie Reviews or Tim Gross there!

Plus you can always go to the greatest T-shirt place online or if you are in Texas visit the store of “Fast Custom Shirts” where T-shirt Joe is the only place you should purchase your horror T-shirts: Go to www.fastcustomshirts.com and support!

Gross Movie Reviews #555

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Gross Movie Reviews #555

The Virus (YouTube) – Philip Brocklehurst busy as ever has released his latest short film that deals with the post-apocalyptic theme or recent times and its effect on a person. Earth has been devastated by biological weapons and a man who is all alone just wants to end the madness on his own terms. A bleak but very realistic look at the world right now as I give the short film 3 out of 4 stars.

Tower Rats (YouTube/DVD) – To even give this mess of a Kevin Walter film a chance you have to imagine if Troma ran Tik Tok and made an anthology film using the things Troma fans posted. What seems like a miss-mash of no plot is a long string of weirdo short films pretty much only hardcore Troma fans will enjoy. It all seems to be set in the Tower District if that means anything to yinz and about ¾’s of the way into the film is that the ‘Puppet Master’ I am hearing? Kudos to Kevin for getting this all together for hardcore Troma fans but outside of them it’s gonna be hard to explain something like this to more mainstream film fans as I give it 2 out of 4 stars. 

Open House (Vimeo) – Matt Cannon from ‘Hexercise’ fame has another short film that has made its way on a recent Indy anthology that concerns a young lady named Sue. She is being trained to sell homes. When Sue is hazed by co-workers with a mask and robe in the home she is cleaning up, Sue is startled and her past comes back to haunt her co-workers. Matt’s latest effort is simple and to the point as Mr. Cannon continues his filmmaking career along with his successful composing music for film career. I give the short film 2 ½ out of 4 stars. 

The Pizzagate Massacre (DVD) – Our story begins in 2018 at a TV station where the Terri Lee show is set up and Karen Black (filmmaker/journalist) has started her new job. After dropping her headset during a live feed hearing startling news about the Illuminati conspiracy, Tootz Pizza, and children who are being used as sex slaves in the basement of this Austin, Texas pizza shop. Karen is fired but distraught by this news so of course she hires a white militia dude named Duncan to help her get proof of the lizard people touching little kids at a pizza shop! Duncan and Karen drive from Waco to Austin only to find out it’s not true but it also all goes bad in a shootout because a member of the same militia follows them and kidnaps Karen setting off a wild police chase and ending to this crazy but all but true ending as I give this interesting gem 3 stars.

Hellblock 13 (DVD) – Gunnar Hansen, Debbie Rochon, 1999, sounds like wonderful ingredients to an awesome anthology… Mostly the film comes off generic with the best performances from the two already mentioned stars that have story time before an execution. The stories are not horrible but fail to make a viewer wanna rewatch the stories being told again and again like a ‘Creepshow’ or ‘Tales from the Darkside’ as I give this anthology 2 stars.

Maniac Killer (DVD) – Bo Svenson, Chuck Connors, and Robert Ginty star in this French thriller about an escort disappearing one evening that becomes a small string of disappearances. A Professor Osborne is being wrongly accused of murder and kidnapping because of the man keeping to himself for his experiments. People who live nearby claim he is doing human experiments but the truth is Robert Ginty is to blame as he plays “creepy guy with dungeon” who believes he and his followers are purifying the evil from the French hookers. Weirdness, a couple solid actors, this is worth at least a watch as I give it 2 stars.

Honkey Holocaust (DVD) – In case you been missing out on filling your exploitation film needs this recent Indy feature does its best to intrigue you then? It is set in late 60s California where in an alternate universe The Manson Family (big strike against any filmmaker attempting to add to this turd of legacy) gets away with murder and builds a bunker. The family heads underground where Charles dies in 1979 from poor conditions but some of his clan survives including a daughter of Charles. But here is already a problem kids? If Charles died after a decade of poor conditions how didn’t the rest of the clan die? But hey, don’t let a bad plot get in the way of telling your story. After a few decades the clan comes out of the bunker to witness the “Race War”? Problem, white people are now the minority and it’s all about a prophecy being fulfilled. Kendra Manson wanders away from her clan to learn about the new world and meets a black man named Lucius who she falls in love with. Kudos for putting together an exploitation that most likely will find a cult audience but you lost me at “Manson Family” as I give this 1 ½ stars.

The Horror of it All (DVD/YouTube) – This 1964 British oddity stars Pat Boone of all people who is Jack Robinson and on his way to see his soon to be wife Cynthia. Cynthia is hanging out at the family estate because she has plans of her own before getting married but Jack cannot wait. This film is comedy of horrors that feels like an early film version of “Clue” as the family is being murdered one by one and Jack believes they all are trying to murder him before his marriage. A hilarious horror/comedy where not only Pat Boone breaks into song you can see tropes set up for future horror/comedies as I give this well worthy gem 3 stars.

The Neptune Factor (DVD) – An early 70s underwater adventure about a sea exploration crew having trouble when an earthquake on the ocean floor happens. The earthquake topples the sea lab off the edge of the ocean floor into an abyss. After a few days search by the Canadian Navy it is time for “the Neptune”. A well-equipped vessel that could conquer the deep sea for its daring rescue. The first half of the film is all about set up then the second half turns into a NatGeo special of underwater adventure with the rescue happening in the last four minutes of the film. If you like Ernest Borgnine and PG-rated undersea drama you may be in for a treat as I give it 2 ½ stars.           

Any comments please send to grossmoviereview@verizon.net or www.facebook.com/grossmoviereviews . Remember folks always support your local independent movie theater, independent video store, and independent filmmakers! It will keep horror alive………

You can find all of my books at www.lulu.com just search for Gross Movie Reviews or Tim Gross there!

Plus you can always go to the greatest T-shirt place online or if you are in Texas visit the store of “Fast Custom Shirts” where T-shirt Joe is the only place you should purchase your horror T-shirts: Go to www.fastcustomshirts.com and support!

Two new episodes of Bloodbaths and Boomsticks

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This week Tim, Kyle, and John recount all the weeks’ viewings and check into 3 flicks to review.  First being Tommy Lee Jones goes full homeland terrorist in THE PARK IS MINE,  Then we get into Robert Ginty straight outta dental surgery and fighting against the powers of the mighty Donald Pleasence in WARRIOR OF THE LOST WORLD.  Then Barbara Stanwick moves into a crazy house in an ABC movie of the week jam called THE HOUSE THAT WOULD NOT DIE.  Also we talk the ins and outs of movie piracy, Living in Amish country, and CHUDS!!!!!

http://bloodbathspodcast.blogspot.com/

 

This time around we talk about 3 more flicks.  The first being picked by Tim and is a movie that stars anyone who has ever been in a horror movie ever…LITERALLY in DEATH HOUSE,  Then another great ABC movie of the week flick in A COLD NIGHTS DEATH (Spoiler Alert} It has monkeys!!!  Then Art kills snooty folks in the newest Netflix jam VELVET BUZZSAW.  Also we talk about the newest and saddest horror gimmick to try to separate you from your money Fanmio.com We answer your questions,  and rundown all of this week’s flicks worth talking about. 

http://bloodbathspodcast.blogspot.com/

Gross Movie Reviews #459

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Gross Movie Reviews #459

 

Superstition (DVD) – In 1692, a witch is burned at the stake but before she dies she of course curses all involved and their families. Now in 1982, a family looking for a fresh start moves into a long empty house that has some history of people dying over the years. Never mind an old retired priest allows them to move in knowing the possibility of death and that the swimming pond out back was placed there to keep the evil witch at bay. Which by the way the pond doesn’t work that well. The neighbor warns them of the strange stuff and the weirdo son of course is the suspect the police are looking for. But who cares a crazy buzz saw flies into the chest of another priest who hoped the curse was gone! If you were a person that frequent the video stores in the 80s good chance you seen the VHS box at one point. The film not great but not horrible either as it is a reminder of movies you never heard of and would take a chance on renting them in the 80s. I give it 2 ½ stars.

 

Superstition 2 (YouTube) – The Italian sequel was released in 1989 and was mostly known under the title “Witch Story”. It has very little to do with the first film other than a witch cursing everyone and a cross that can fend the witch off. A brother and sister take their college friends to an abandoned home they inherited and has some bad history. Even though this film involves a witch it has more of a demon flick tone as demons possess some of the young people and turn them on each other. If there is one reason to watch this it is for the bad ass scene involving a dude in a pond about to get a chainsaw to the skull from his possessed girlfriend! I give the sequel 2 stars but in the end don’t make a whole of sense.

 

Lady Avenger (VHS) – David DeCoteau directs, Michelle Bauer shows up topless at least three times, and William Butler plays the boyfriend of Maggie our “Lady Avenger”. The woman that plays Maggie also goes on about a year or so later to be in Playboy. Anyway Maggie has just got out of the big house to go to her brother’s funeral. Pissed off and wanting answers she breaks away from her protective custody to get to the boatyard to ask questions. After kicking three dudes ass and gets away from them in a fiery car chase she bangs her boyfriend and gets back on the case. As she begins to piece things together of all involved she realizes the people she wants revenge against are much closer to her than she thinks. This of course ups the level of wanting revenge where she goes all Robert “The Exterminator” Ginty with a flamethrower. A fun C-grade action flick that was a direct-to-video back in 1988 as I give this flick 2 ½ stars.

 

A Bay of Blood (DVD) – A 1971 Mario Bava film that has many death scenes stolen by the “Friday the 13th” films whether horror fans admit it or not.  Because of an older woman unwilling to sell her beautiful land and we get some fast and furious murders. The movie begins with two murders. One is the older woman who is made to look like a suicide. Then who killed her is then killed by an unknown person and his body is made to disappear so no one can find it. A wonderful film of double crosses with an excellent ending. For one reason or another Bava has never been in my wheelhouse so I am not a fan nor a hater but willing to check out his films when I come across them. I give it 2 ½ stars.

Death Kiss (On Demand) – So are you a fan of Chuck Bronson and the “Death Wish” films then you will enjoy bootleg Bronson in this low budget homage to those films. We meet a DJ played by Daniel Baldwin who just rages against the city police for not doing their job. That maybe a vigilante is needed? In comes bootleg Chuck Bronson who doesn’t use many words but has many uses for hand guns to bring down criminals. He steals the money from the criminals he brings down and hands it off to a single mother of a little girl in a wheelchair. Thinking she is charity and needs to pay bootleg Chuck backed she tries her best to find out more about him. But bootleg Bronson has his reasons and keeps them at arm’s length. The movie is absolutely a lot of nostalgia and fun. The movie isn’t perfect but a wonderful gift for us Bronson fans to fill the void as I give this flick 3 stars.

 

The Horseman (On Demand) – A hidden low budget gem from Australia about a 44-year old father who has just lost his daughter under suspicious circumstances. The father is sent a porn video that stars his daughter who was used by four men and was under the influence of heavy drugs. After seeing this it sends the man into a primal rage to seek out all involved, torture them horribly, and end their lives for what they did to his daughter. As he travels on the highway on his quest he picks up a hitchhiking teenager named Alice. Alice and the man become friends on the road but she knows nothing of his quest for revenge. The story is gritty, screwed up, and this dude has a thing about fucking up people’s dicks! This is literally one bad ass air pump to the penis as I give it 3 ½ stars and yes the father uses a tire pump!

 

Halloween: The Panhandle Massacre (YouTube) – A not-for-profit fan film written and directed by Dean Thomas stars David Dietz as Dr. Loomis’ grandson who oversees Michael Myers. Myers has broken out again and is loose near the Panhandle Trail in Pittsburgh back on his murder spree. Authorities have no clue what to do but Dr. Loomis is there to help guide detectives in the capture or killing of Myers to stop the unstoppable killer again. Well-acted and well produced music for the fan made film makes it one of the better “Halloween” fan made features I have seen over the years as I give it 2 ½ out of 4 stars.

Babes in Psycho Land (DVD) – Two of my favorite filmmakers are back as the feature is directed by the intelligent David Silvio and produced and written by his equally talented wife Diana Silvio. The film is a simple story about Mary trying to reopen her home for foster kids and Andy trying to deal with his bizarre issues. Apparently some time ago Andy’s twin Alex and a girl named Jenny that Andy had a crush on were killed. So anytime Andy comes in contact with a female like Officer Piper Paisley, he believes it is Jenny and swears he won’t hurt her. But it always ends horribly wrong and as Officer Paisley gets pulled into this bizarre world of Mary, Andy, and the foster home she begins to enjoy it too much. Andy finding females again Mary, head of the house is not at all happy but Mary has her own bizarre issues as she is told she may not reopen. The movie rides the edge of sanity really well as it brings you into a bizarre world of you are not sure who the actual victim is and gives you that wonderful uneasy feeling in the pit of your stomach. Kiss of Death Productions once again makes a film that cannot be classified but is must-see independent film that is a cut above most. The whole cast plays their roles perfectly including those of Jack and Cassandra at the end of the film. The Silvios don’t make films for everyone but they do make films for people who are looking for something different and interesting every time out. I give this cringe-worthy movie 3 ½ out 4 stars.

 

Warrior of the Lost World (VHS) – Robert Ginty is a man who rides his super cycle through the Wasteland that might be the only hope for what’s left of mankind. As he rides he is chased by a brutal police force of the ‘Omega’ where he is forced to drive into a wall of rock. Lucky for ‘the rider’ aka Robert Ginty he is pure or at least according to Fred Williamson and ‘the elders’. He has been chosen to help infiltrate the ‘omega’ and help a man escape who is being tortured by the leader Donald freakin Pleasence! Sounds fun, has a great cast, a talking motorcycle, but somehow doesn’t translate into cinema gold? David Worth who is also known for giving us “Shark Attack 2 & 3”, “Kickboxer”, and “Hazard Jack” didn’t seem to have much to work with in Italy but did his best. I give this flick 2 stars as the cast outshines the hokey film.

 

The Park is Mine (YouTube) – Totally forgot how good this film is starring Tommy Lee Jones as a Vietnam vet Mitch who has lost a friend recently. The friend’s dying wish is for Mitch to use his plan to take over Central Park for a few days till Veteran’s Day. His hope is people will take notice and appreciate what these vets did and stop being mistreated. So Mitch goes ahead with the plan unsure if it would work but it does. He asks the commissioner to give him 72 hours to keep the park empty. That is all well and good until the deputy mayor gets involved and things begin to get messy. All the deputy mayor wants is Mitch to die and go away especially when he sends in two mercs to take him down. But meanwhile a reporter with a camera gets in the park and gets to videotape what Mitch is trying to do. I give this film 3 ½ stars and its message of how Vietnam vets were forgotten and mistreated is still relevant today.

 

The House That Would Not Die (DVD/YouTube) – A 1970 TV movie where Ruth and Sara inherit a home that was built in the late 1700s. Apparently Ruth’s cousin took a liking to Ruth when she was young and left the house to her. But the old Campbell house has a haunting history and strange things begin to happen to Sara after a fun séance is done and a spirit enters Sara. The problem is restless spirits live beyond a fake wall in the basement that seeks answers for their peaceful death slumber. A very PG-rated paranormal film is the best thing I can say about the old TV movie as I give it 1 ½ stars.

 

Any comments or questions please send to grossmoviereview@verizon.netor www.facebook.com/grossmoviereviews . Remember folks always support your local independent movie theater, independent video store, and independent filmmakers! It will keep horror alive………

Don’t forget you can also hear Kyle Poling and me talking about horror flicks on a weekly basis on the Bloodbaths and Boomsticks podcast at: www.bloodbathspodcast.blogspot.com/ also available at http://www.stitcher.com/podcast/kyle-poling-2/bloodbaths-and-boomsticks?refid=stpr

Plus you can always go to the greatest T-shirt place online or if you are in Texas visit the store of “Fast Custom Shirts” where T-shirt Joe is the only place you should purchase your horror T-shirts: Go to www.fastcustomshirts.com for details.

Grossfest 2 is coming… July 20, 2019, check our Grossfest Facebook page and www.grossfest.comfor details and upcoming guests. #grossfest #grossfest2019

Gross Movie Reviews #314

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Gross Movie Reviews #314

 

By Tim Gross

 

Cheerleader Camp (DVD) – A 1988 slasher that got past me during my teenage years and once I found out about the film I made it a point to track it down and review the slasher flick. And after many years the horror film did not disappoint me as I enjoyed its gory cheese the whole way. The film sports a great cast for a slasher film in Leif Garrett, George “Buck” Flower, Betsy Russell, the amazing looking Lucinda Dickey (the Breakin’ films), and a before porn and absolutely beautiful Teri Weigel! The film follows a group of cheerleaders that leave for the wilderness to train and win the Cheerleader championship… Sounds fun for all until Allison keeps having bad dreams and her boyfriend Leif Garrett keeps trying to bang other women, then next thing you know someone gets a bear trap to the face and another gets hedge clippers to the face. Blood, boobs, and more blood make this slasher film worth revisiting again as I give it 3 stars and may boast the funniest mascot eating lunch scene ever? Apparently depending what country the film was released it could be found as “Bloody Poms Poms” on VHS and DVD.

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Circuitry Man 2: Plughead Rewired (VHS) – Vernon Wells stars as Plughead in this futuristic film where most humans live underground and the government has Plughead to experiment on until he makes a deal with a scientist (Traci Lords) to help her have a baby. After helping Plughead escaped he is back in business and rewiring humans in order for them to extend their life by ten years and it is up to the Romeo droid again to stop him. George “Buck” Flower and Nicolas Worth round out this great low budget 90s sci-fi flick. Vernon Wells always makes movies better and this no different as I give the flick 3 stars.

 

Sorority Girls and the Creature from Hell (VHS) – This beyond low budget sci-fi film from 1990 has an archeologist stumbling upon an ancient relic in a mountain that just happens to possess him and search for blood. Meanwhile his niece, daughter, can’t remember goes with friends to his cabin to fuck around until they are massacred quite quickly. I give the flick 2 stars.

 

Invaders from Mars (DVD) – A mid-80s Tobe Hooper flick that I always get mixed up with 1983s “Strange Invaders”. This flick plays out more like a very creepy episode of “Goosebumps” with wicked ass alien creatures. But anyway one night during a stormy night aliens land at Copper Hill, a small California town where they begin to take over humans and consume copper. Soon most of the town is taken over except for a kid and he gets the school nurse (Karen Black) to believe him and try to help get the army to stop it before it’s too late. The kid is played by Hunter Carson who just happened to be the original Bud Bundy but was let go after the pilot when Ed O’Neal felt like he just wasn’t right for the part. Plus we get a quick Conehead impression from Lorraine Newman (pay attention at the end of the film), James Karen playing an army general, and the legendary Phil Fondacaro is uncredited with playing one of the alien creatures. A cool and creepy classic sci-fi/horror film for many who grew up during the 80s. I give the film 3 stars.

 

Girls Nite Out (DVD) – A 1982 slasher film starring Hal Holbrook that looks more like it was made in 1977. It’s ‘Hell Week’ at college and the new pledges are told of the legendary Dickey Cavanagh who couldn’t take the break up with his girlfriend real well and killed her. Security guard Hal Holbrook makes a phone call to the asylum only to find out Dickey killed himself two days ago when these killings started. This may be the best bear suited slasher film to date as I give it 2 ½ stars.

 

Kiss in Attack of the Phantoms (DVD) – The made for TV movie was also known as “Kiss Meets the Phantom of the Park” but in 1978 was beyond the imagination of Kiss fans as they could not get enough of Kiss. But the film also marks the beginning of the end for the legendary rock band or at least the original members as fights broke out behind the scenes. The film may be more notorious for its behind the scenes action than what was actually being filmed for the NBC movie of the week? The film had problems from the beginning as Kiss having such a heavy touring schedule at the time was not able to write new songs for the film or even be able to reshoot some scenes that were unusable and eventually some dubbing was done. Plus there was pointing of fingers of drug use, rewrites, etc. But after it was finished all four members refuse to acknowledge the bad film. Basic plot is Kiss comes to play a couple concerts at an amusement park but ends up getting entangled in a fight with an evil scientist that wants to destroy Kiss. The film was based on their comic book characters which also explain how big the band was at the time. The film is completely retarded and doesn’t make much sense but will always give me the memory of my mom looking for the VHS tape for almost a full decade during the 80s so she could give it to my brother for his birthday one year. Too much time has passed for me to remember why it was so hard to find but it always makes for a great memory when watching Peter Criss flipping around, Gene Simmons roaring like a lion for no reason, Paul sporting the hairy chest, and Ace karate kicking weird ass cat people next to a roller coaster! I may only give the movie 1 star but I will always have that memory.

 

The Retaliator (VHS) – The very underrated actor Robert Ginty aka ‘The Exterminator’ is pissed that he captures a American woman (Sandahl Bergman) who is helping terrorists while his team was there to rescue two kids. When Ginty’s character tries to find out more about her he learns she went brain dead so the CIA decides to experiment on her and turn her into a weapon aka “Eve of Destruction”. But soon she gains some memories after killing her target and decides she needs more targets. Great low budget action stuff that will make you forget the Gregory Hines film. I give the flick 3 stars and can be also found under the title “Programmed to Kill”.

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