Two new episodes of Bloodbaths and Boomsticks

0

This week Tim, Kyle, and John recount all the weeks’ viewings and check into 3 flicks to review.  First being Tommy Lee Jones goes full homeland terrorist in THE PARK IS MINE,  Then we get into Robert Ginty straight outta dental surgery and fighting against the powers of the mighty Donald Pleasence in WARRIOR OF THE LOST WORLD.  Then Barbara Stanwick moves into a crazy house in an ABC movie of the week jam called THE HOUSE THAT WOULD NOT DIE.  Also we talk the ins and outs of movie piracy, Living in Amish country, and CHUDS!!!!!

http://bloodbathspodcast.blogspot.com/

 

This time around we talk about 3 more flicks.  The first being picked by Tim and is a movie that stars anyone who has ever been in a horror movie ever…LITERALLY in DEATH HOUSE,  Then another great ABC movie of the week flick in A COLD NIGHTS DEATH (Spoiler Alert} It has monkeys!!!  Then Art kills snooty folks in the newest Netflix jam VELVET BUZZSAW.  Also we talk about the newest and saddest horror gimmick to try to separate you from your money Fanmio.com We answer your questions,  and rundown all of this week’s flicks worth talking about. 

http://bloodbathspodcast.blogspot.com/

Gross Movie Reviews #459

1

Gross Movie Reviews #459

 

Superstition (DVD) – In 1692, a witch is burned at the stake but before she dies she of course curses all involved and their families. Now in 1982, a family looking for a fresh start moves into a long empty house that has some history of people dying over the years. Never mind an old retired priest allows them to move in knowing the possibility of death and that the swimming pond out back was placed there to keep the evil witch at bay. Which by the way the pond doesn’t work that well. The neighbor warns them of the strange stuff and the weirdo son of course is the suspect the police are looking for. But who cares a crazy buzz saw flies into the chest of another priest who hoped the curse was gone! If you were a person that frequent the video stores in the 80s good chance you seen the VHS box at one point. The film not great but not horrible either as it is a reminder of movies you never heard of and would take a chance on renting them in the 80s. I give it 2 ½ stars.

 

Superstition 2 (YouTube) – The Italian sequel was released in 1989 and was mostly known under the title “Witch Story”. It has very little to do with the first film other than a witch cursing everyone and a cross that can fend the witch off. A brother and sister take their college friends to an abandoned home they inherited and has some bad history. Even though this film involves a witch it has more of a demon flick tone as demons possess some of the young people and turn them on each other. If there is one reason to watch this it is for the bad ass scene involving a dude in a pond about to get a chainsaw to the skull from his possessed girlfriend! I give the sequel 2 stars but in the end don’t make a whole of sense.

 

Lady Avenger (VHS) – David DeCoteau directs, Michelle Bauer shows up topless at least three times, and William Butler plays the boyfriend of Maggie our “Lady Avenger”. The woman that plays Maggie also goes on about a year or so later to be in Playboy. Anyway Maggie has just got out of the big house to go to her brother’s funeral. Pissed off and wanting answers she breaks away from her protective custody to get to the boatyard to ask questions. After kicking three dudes ass and gets away from them in a fiery car chase she bangs her boyfriend and gets back on the case. As she begins to piece things together of all involved she realizes the people she wants revenge against are much closer to her than she thinks. This of course ups the level of wanting revenge where she goes all Robert “The Exterminator” Ginty with a flamethrower. A fun C-grade action flick that was a direct-to-video back in 1988 as I give this flick 2 ½ stars.

 

A Bay of Blood (DVD) – A 1971 Mario Bava film that has many death scenes stolen by the “Friday the 13th” films whether horror fans admit it or not.  Because of an older woman unwilling to sell her beautiful land and we get some fast and furious murders. The movie begins with two murders. One is the older woman who is made to look like a suicide. Then who killed her is then killed by an unknown person and his body is made to disappear so no one can find it. A wonderful film of double crosses with an excellent ending. For one reason or another Bava has never been in my wheelhouse so I am not a fan nor a hater but willing to check out his films when I come across them. I give it 2 ½ stars.

Death Kiss (On Demand) – So are you a fan of Chuck Bronson and the “Death Wish” films then you will enjoy bootleg Bronson in this low budget homage to those films. We meet a DJ played by Daniel Baldwin who just rages against the city police for not doing their job. That maybe a vigilante is needed? In comes bootleg Chuck Bronson who doesn’t use many words but has many uses for hand guns to bring down criminals. He steals the money from the criminals he brings down and hands it off to a single mother of a little girl in a wheelchair. Thinking she is charity and needs to pay bootleg Chuck backed she tries her best to find out more about him. But bootleg Bronson has his reasons and keeps them at arm’s length. The movie is absolutely a lot of nostalgia and fun. The movie isn’t perfect but a wonderful gift for us Bronson fans to fill the void as I give this flick 3 stars.

 

The Horseman (On Demand) – A hidden low budget gem from Australia about a 44-year old father who has just lost his daughter under suspicious circumstances. The father is sent a porn video that stars his daughter who was used by four men and was under the influence of heavy drugs. After seeing this it sends the man into a primal rage to seek out all involved, torture them horribly, and end their lives for what they did to his daughter. As he travels on the highway on his quest he picks up a hitchhiking teenager named Alice. Alice and the man become friends on the road but she knows nothing of his quest for revenge. The story is gritty, screwed up, and this dude has a thing about fucking up people’s dicks! This is literally one bad ass air pump to the penis as I give it 3 ½ stars and yes the father uses a tire pump!

 

Halloween: The Panhandle Massacre (YouTube) – A not-for-profit fan film written and directed by Dean Thomas stars David Dietz as Dr. Loomis’ grandson who oversees Michael Myers. Myers has broken out again and is loose near the Panhandle Trail in Pittsburgh back on his murder spree. Authorities have no clue what to do but Dr. Loomis is there to help guide detectives in the capture or killing of Myers to stop the unstoppable killer again. Well-acted and well produced music for the fan made film makes it one of the better “Halloween” fan made features I have seen over the years as I give it 2 ½ out of 4 stars.

Babes in Psycho Land (DVD) – Two of my favorite filmmakers are back as the feature is directed by the intelligent David Silvio and produced and written by his equally talented wife Diana Silvio. The film is a simple story about Mary trying to reopen her home for foster kids and Andy trying to deal with his bizarre issues. Apparently some time ago Andy’s twin Alex and a girl named Jenny that Andy had a crush on were killed. So anytime Andy comes in contact with a female like Officer Piper Paisley, he believes it is Jenny and swears he won’t hurt her. But it always ends horribly wrong and as Officer Paisley gets pulled into this bizarre world of Mary, Andy, and the foster home she begins to enjoy it too much. Andy finding females again Mary, head of the house is not at all happy but Mary has her own bizarre issues as she is told she may not reopen. The movie rides the edge of sanity really well as it brings you into a bizarre world of you are not sure who the actual victim is and gives you that wonderful uneasy feeling in the pit of your stomach. Kiss of Death Productions once again makes a film that cannot be classified but is must-see independent film that is a cut above most. The whole cast plays their roles perfectly including those of Jack and Cassandra at the end of the film. The Silvios don’t make films for everyone but they do make films for people who are looking for something different and interesting every time out. I give this cringe-worthy movie 3 ½ out 4 stars.

 

Warrior of the Lost World (VHS) – Robert Ginty is a man who rides his super cycle through the Wasteland that might be the only hope for what’s left of mankind. As he rides he is chased by a brutal police force of the ‘Omega’ where he is forced to drive into a wall of rock. Lucky for ‘the rider’ aka Robert Ginty he is pure or at least according to Fred Williamson and ‘the elders’. He has been chosen to help infiltrate the ‘omega’ and help a man escape who is being tortured by the leader Donald freakin Pleasence! Sounds fun, has a great cast, a talking motorcycle, but somehow doesn’t translate into cinema gold? David Worth who is also known for giving us “Shark Attack 2 & 3”, “Kickboxer”, and “Hazard Jack” didn’t seem to have much to work with in Italy but did his best. I give this flick 2 stars as the cast outshines the hokey film.

 

The Park is Mine (YouTube) – Totally forgot how good this film is starring Tommy Lee Jones as a Vietnam vet Mitch who has lost a friend recently. The friend’s dying wish is for Mitch to use his plan to take over Central Park for a few days till Veteran’s Day. His hope is people will take notice and appreciate what these vets did and stop being mistreated. So Mitch goes ahead with the plan unsure if it would work but it does. He asks the commissioner to give him 72 hours to keep the park empty. That is all well and good until the deputy mayor gets involved and things begin to get messy. All the deputy mayor wants is Mitch to die and go away especially when he sends in two mercs to take him down. But meanwhile a reporter with a camera gets in the park and gets to videotape what Mitch is trying to do. I give this film 3 ½ stars and its message of how Vietnam vets were forgotten and mistreated is still relevant today.

 

The House That Would Not Die (DVD/YouTube) – A 1970 TV movie where Ruth and Sara inherit a home that was built in the late 1700s. Apparently Ruth’s cousin took a liking to Ruth when she was young and left the house to her. But the old Campbell house has a haunting history and strange things begin to happen to Sara after a fun séance is done and a spirit enters Sara. The problem is restless spirits live beyond a fake wall in the basement that seeks answers for their peaceful death slumber. A very PG-rated paranormal film is the best thing I can say about the old TV movie as I give it 1 ½ stars.

 

Any comments or questions please send to grossmoviereview@verizon.netor www.facebook.com/grossmoviereviews . Remember folks always support your local independent movie theater, independent video store, and independent filmmakers! It will keep horror alive………

Don’t forget you can also hear Kyle Poling and me talking about horror flicks on a weekly basis on the Bloodbaths and Boomsticks podcast at: www.bloodbathspodcast.blogspot.com/ also available at http://www.stitcher.com/podcast/kyle-poling-2/bloodbaths-and-boomsticks?refid=stpr

Plus you can always go to the greatest T-shirt place online or if you are in Texas visit the store of “Fast Custom Shirts” where T-shirt Joe is the only place you should purchase your horror T-shirts: Go to www.fastcustomshirts.com for details.

Grossfest 2 is coming… July 20, 2019, check our Grossfest Facebook page and www.grossfest.comfor details and upcoming guests. #grossfest #grossfest2019

Gross Movie Reviews #314

0

Gross Movie Reviews #314

 

By Tim Gross

 

Cheerleader Camp (DVD) – A 1988 slasher that got past me during my teenage years and once I found out about the film I made it a point to track it down and review the slasher flick. And after many years the horror film did not disappoint me as I enjoyed its gory cheese the whole way. The film sports a great cast for a slasher film in Leif Garrett, George “Buck” Flower, Betsy Russell, the amazing looking Lucinda Dickey (the Breakin’ films), and a before porn and absolutely beautiful Teri Weigel! The film follows a group of cheerleaders that leave for the wilderness to train and win the Cheerleader championship… Sounds fun for all until Allison keeps having bad dreams and her boyfriend Leif Garrett keeps trying to bang other women, then next thing you know someone gets a bear trap to the face and another gets hedge clippers to the face. Blood, boobs, and more blood make this slasher film worth revisiting again as I give it 3 stars and may boast the funniest mascot eating lunch scene ever? Apparently depending what country the film was released it could be found as “Bloody Poms Poms” on VHS and DVD.

CM 2

Circuitry Man 2: Plughead Rewired (VHS) – Vernon Wells stars as Plughead in this futuristic film where most humans live underground and the government has Plughead to experiment on until he makes a deal with a scientist (Traci Lords) to help her have a baby. After helping Plughead escaped he is back in business and rewiring humans in order for them to extend their life by ten years and it is up to the Romeo droid again to stop him. George “Buck” Flower and Nicolas Worth round out this great low budget 90s sci-fi flick. Vernon Wells always makes movies better and this no different as I give the flick 3 stars.

 

Sorority Girls and the Creature from Hell (VHS) – This beyond low budget sci-fi film from 1990 has an archeologist stumbling upon an ancient relic in a mountain that just happens to possess him and search for blood. Meanwhile his niece, daughter, can’t remember goes with friends to his cabin to fuck around until they are massacred quite quickly. I give the flick 2 stars.

 

Invaders from Mars (DVD) – A mid-80s Tobe Hooper flick that I always get mixed up with 1983s “Strange Invaders”. This flick plays out more like a very creepy episode of “Goosebumps” with wicked ass alien creatures. But anyway one night during a stormy night aliens land at Copper Hill, a small California town where they begin to take over humans and consume copper. Soon most of the town is taken over except for a kid and he gets the school nurse (Karen Black) to believe him and try to help get the army to stop it before it’s too late. The kid is played by Hunter Carson who just happened to be the original Bud Bundy but was let go after the pilot when Ed O’Neal felt like he just wasn’t right for the part. Plus we get a quick Conehead impression from Lorraine Newman (pay attention at the end of the film), James Karen playing an army general, and the legendary Phil Fondacaro is uncredited with playing one of the alien creatures. A cool and creepy classic sci-fi/horror film for many who grew up during the 80s. I give the film 3 stars.

 

Girls Nite Out (DVD) – A 1982 slasher film starring Hal Holbrook that looks more like it was made in 1977. It’s ‘Hell Week’ at college and the new pledges are told of the legendary Dickey Cavanagh who couldn’t take the break up with his girlfriend real well and killed her. Security guard Hal Holbrook makes a phone call to the asylum only to find out Dickey killed himself two days ago when these killings started. This may be the best bear suited slasher film to date as I give it 2 ½ stars.

 

Kiss in Attack of the Phantoms (DVD) – The made for TV movie was also known as “Kiss Meets the Phantom of the Park” but in 1978 was beyond the imagination of Kiss fans as they could not get enough of Kiss. But the film also marks the beginning of the end for the legendary rock band or at least the original members as fights broke out behind the scenes. The film may be more notorious for its behind the scenes action than what was actually being filmed for the NBC movie of the week? The film had problems from the beginning as Kiss having such a heavy touring schedule at the time was not able to write new songs for the film or even be able to reshoot some scenes that were unusable and eventually some dubbing was done. Plus there was pointing of fingers of drug use, rewrites, etc. But after it was finished all four members refuse to acknowledge the bad film. Basic plot is Kiss comes to play a couple concerts at an amusement park but ends up getting entangled in a fight with an evil scientist that wants to destroy Kiss. The film was based on their comic book characters which also explain how big the band was at the time. The film is completely retarded and doesn’t make much sense but will always give me the memory of my mom looking for the VHS tape for almost a full decade during the 80s so she could give it to my brother for his birthday one year. Too much time has passed for me to remember why it was so hard to find but it always makes for a great memory when watching Peter Criss flipping around, Gene Simmons roaring like a lion for no reason, Paul sporting the hairy chest, and Ace karate kicking weird ass cat people next to a roller coaster! I may only give the movie 1 star but I will always have that memory.

 

The Retaliator (VHS) – The very underrated actor Robert Ginty aka ‘The Exterminator’ is pissed that he captures a American woman (Sandahl Bergman) who is helping terrorists while his team was there to rescue two kids. When Ginty’s character tries to find out more about her he learns she went brain dead so the CIA decides to experiment on her and turn her into a weapon aka “Eve of Destruction”. But soon she gains some memories after killing her target and decides she needs more targets. Great low budget action stuff that will make you forget the Gregory Hines film. I give the flick 3 stars and can be also found under the title “Programmed to Kill”.

Any comments or questions please send to: GrossMovieReview@verizon.net, GrossMovieReview@aol.com or www.facebook.com/grossmoviereviews . Remember folks always support your local independent movie theater, independent video store, and independent filmmakers! It will keep horror alive………

You can always visit and see some past reviews at: www.grossmoviereviews.com !!!

Also you now can purchase the co-directed film project from Daniel Boyd and I called, “Jagoff Massacre” at www.jagoffmassacre.com . There is a sequel in the works…

Don’t forget you can also hear Kyle Poling and me talking about horror flicks on a weekly basis on the Bloodbaths and Boomsticks podcast at http://bloodbathsandboomsticks.blogspot.com/ .

Plus you can always go to the greatest T-shirt place online or if you are in Texas visit the store of “Fast Custom Shirts” where T-shirt Joe is the only place that you can purchase a Gross Movie Reviews t-shirt but also Cannibal Campout, Woodchipper Massacre, and Spookies T-shirts also!!!! Go towww.fastcustomshirts.com for details.