Category Archives: Gross Movie Reviews

Gross Movie Reviews #372

0
Posted on by

Gross Movie Reviews #372

 

By Tim Gross

 

The Barbarians (DVD) – This 1987 fantasy film and everything you could want? Ruggero Deodato directing, Richard Lynch as your villain, Michael Berryman as The Dirtmaster who trains these twins to be warriors, and a George Eastman appearance! A traveling circus is attacked by an evil bastard (Richard Lynch) who decides to take the princess aka the woman named Canary and the twins traveling with the circus. The twins are separated and trained to be warriors. When the twins grow up they are played by popular 80s muscle bound duo: Peter and David Paul. The twins are forced to fight each other but overcome the battle and help each other out to escape and get revenge. There is also a dragon, looks horrible but still a shit load of fun! I give the flick 3 ½ stars.

 

Chemical Peel (DVD) – A bachelorette party in the woods goes horribly wrong when the women go to sleep and wake up to a horrible fog outside of their cabin and a dead baby in the cabin. Things break down from there as they learn through static TV and radio that a train derailed not too far away and spilled a chemical that reacted causing mass evacuation. With the fog seeping in and the ladies learning the hard way to not use water it becomes a horrifying outcome. Great stuff folks, women turning on each other, characters you will hate right off the bat, and some beautiful disgusting gooey effects. So see who survives as I give the horror flick 3 stars.

 

Night of the Creeps 2 (DVD) – First off this film has nothing to do with the classic we all know and love. But what is weird this film from 2006 is an independent film that I know as ‘Zombie Town’. So how did it get the name blame Germany as it was sold there as a sequel somehow? But what makes this title even weirder is that I viewed a screener of the film ‘Zombie Town’ from MTI video over a decade ago and it was different from the version called, ‘Night of the Creeps 2’. Some of the information is sketchy but could not find out who exactly made this decision to retitle, rerelease, or even recut the film. Bottom line: I remember liking it just as “Zombie Town” and even comparing it or getting its influence from ‘Night of the Creeps’ but now pissed it somehow was marketed as a sequel. If you like killer leeches that turn small town folk into zombies this is right up your alley. So try not to condemn this film for a title change that was most likely out of the filmmaker’s hands… I believe I give it 3 ½ stars a decade ago. So hope your mind just didn’t blow up knowing this exists?

septicman11

Septic Man (DVD) – Same person that gave us ‘Monster Brawl’ gives us horror fans another weird tale of Canadian horror that stars Stephen McHattie (plays all-around creepy cool dudes), Julian Richards (best known as ‘Death’ on ‘Supernatural TV series’), and the great actress Molly Dunsworth (Hobo with a Shotgun). A town is being evacuated because sickness and disease is spreading through the town killing people but Jack chooses to stay behind. Jack is the ‘Septic Man’. He is offered a large sum of money to stay behind and solve the issue as he believes he knows why the water is contaminated?  But Jack isn’t ready for what happens after he fixes the problem and that is being trapped in the contaminated waste of the dead that is being dumped by a weirdo killer and his 7 foot brother who is afraid of him. The problem is fixed and the people come back but Jack is still trapped and going insane! Great weirdo ‘Slime City’ kinda vibe horror film as I give it 3 ½ stars.

 

Poltergeist (DVD/remake) – I was on the ropes about this flick mainly because the trailers made it look like another ‘Paranormal Activity’ clone. But I finally gave the remake a shot and was very surprised of how much it did not stray away from the 1982 original film. I didn’t hate it, I didn’t like it… The film really doesn’t take any chances to separate itself from the original. There isn’t a whole lot to say as much of it is a clone. I see this film as a useless chore in viewing it. I give it 2 stars. Hell, most people will forget this like ‘The Evil Dead’ remake.

Final Girls

Final Girls (DVD) – The only bad thing I can say about this film was I wish I seen this sooner as this will be one of my favorite horror films I have watched in 2016. Anyway a college girl, Max, is trying to get over her mother’s death still three years later. Her best friend’s brother works at a theater that is celebrating the cult horror slashers ‘Camp Bloodbath 1 and 2’. Max’s mother was famous for starring in the original and Max is asked to come be a part of the festival. She does an accident happens which starts the theater into a full on raging fire. Max and her friends cut through the movie screen to escape and find themselves in 1986 ‘Camp Bloodbath’ movie world. The non-stop slashing, blood, laughs are non-stop as Max and friends try to figure out how to fend off the movie’s killer Billy long enough to get back to the real world! This horror film is 4 stars all the way. It’s a slasher fan’s wet dream of a horror movie!

 

Manson Family Vacation (DVD) – A film about two brothers who are complete opposites and the older brother is adopted. The older brother was an artist but now has sold everything to travel the US and go on a road trip with his brother to everything Manson related before he goes off into the desert for his next job. The younger brother keeps trying to look out for him but knows he cannot control what he does not understand. It’s not a comedy, it’s not horror, and I don’t know if you could classify it as a road trip movie? But I do know I would like my 90 minutes back that I wasted on watching it. I give it 1 star.

 

The Editor (DVD) – A lot of the same people that were involved with ‘Father’s Day’ and ‘Manborg’ have yet another oddity where it seems to be set in early 80s Italy where an editor Rey Ciso was famous at one point but had a horrible accident. The accident took away four of his fingers off of his right hand. Now, treated like shit he is a suspect on the latest film he is editing as the stars are dropping like flies in bloody Eye-talian fashion. It is a beautifully absurd horror film that is a must see like the other two projects I have mention earlier in the review. I give the film 3 stars.

 

Spring (DVD) – A young man named Evan watches his mother die and there are not many friends around so he decides it is time to take a trip far, far away. Evan goes to Italy to drink with a couple of dudes and he doesn’t know but travels with anyway until he meets a mysterious woman. Almost immediately falling in love with her Evan finds a place to stay and goes into town just to run into her have dinner, coffee, anything just to have a relationship. But the woman with the dark past blows Evan’s mind when after they have sex she wants him to go away, she is now pregnant, and just happens to be some kind of ancient creature that needs stem cells to possibly stop her transformation. To put it simply: A Lovecraftian love story. Love the wide and far shots as you can see the beauty of the country in a lot of the scenes. And enjoyed the dialogue that keeps the film moving along but in the end I kept waiting for something more to happen… I give the film 2 stars.

Mold

Mold (DVD) – Its 1984, somewhere in the middle of the Arizona desert and scientists are experimenting with mold. They have developed a new strain of mold spores for the military that can kill everything and they are putting on a classified show for a select few. Things go okay until the new deadly mold infects the congressman. The underground bunker soon has the deadly mold spores spreading throughout the place. The group only has one chance if they can get controller agent and that isn’t even a given since it is untested. The group also finds out they are never allowed to leave as they are part of a bigger experiment to see how well the new deadly mold works. Pretty cool concept for an independent horror film but what makes worth the watch is its unbelievable gooey and gruesome over the top splatter effects! Gallons of green goo, exploding body parts make this a must for all gorehounds! I give the goo busting horror film 3 stars.

 

White Phantom (VHS) – I knew I was in for a treat when the Vidmark logo came up on this 1987 ninja flick. The film begins with some camo ninjas stealing weapons grade plutonium for the Sakura family who are powerful in China. From there we go right to the nightclub scene where we are introduce to our hero the ugly American (Jay Roberts Jr.) checking out a hot dancer. Roberts’s character is a mysterious man of sorts as he likes whores and playing basketball with the local kids when he isn’t signing baseballs as Babe Ruth. When that isn’t going down he would like to know more about this hot dancer at the night club who is just trying to repay a debt by getting info from the Sakura family about the weapons grade plutonium. The dancer is eventually killed by a ninja which of course sets up winner takes all (plutonium min this case) good ninja vs. bad ninja. And Bo Svenson collects a paycheck. I give the ninja film 2 ½ stars.

 

The Asphyx (YouTube) – A scientist who finds a blotch in a photograph and believes it is a ghost or possible soul leaving the body. He becomes obsessed with this find and wants it. The scientist believes this could be the link to immortality? An early 70s movie that is a good pick for a rainy Saturday afternoon that has that Hammer film feel to it as I give it 2 ½ stars.

 

Any comments or questions please send to: GrossMovieReview@verizon.net, GrossMovieReview@aol.com or www.facebook.com/grossmoviereviews . Remember folks always support your local independent movie theater, independent video store, and independent filmmakers! It will keep horror alive………

You can always visit and see some past reviews, independent film news, or me ranting at: www.grossmoviereviews.com !!!

Don’t forget you can also hear Kyle Poling and me talking about horror flicks on a weekly basis on the Bloodbaths and Boomsticks podcast at: www.bloodbathspodcast.blogspot.com/

Plus you can always go to the greatest T-shirt place online or if you are in Texas visit the store of “Fast Custom Shirts” where T-shirt Joe is the only place you should purchase your horror T-shirts: Go to www.fastcustomshirts.com for details.

Next up, you can come by the vendor table I will be at for a book, shirt, or a movie at Cinema Wasteland April 1, 2, 3rd, 2016 in Strongsville, Ohio (for details: www.cinemawasteland.com) .

Gross Movie Reviews #371

0
Posted on by

Gross Movie Reviews #371

 

By Tim Gross

 

Passed the Door of Darkness (DVD) – Two detectives that are having trouble catching a serial killer that is always one step ahead. The older detective finds out he has a brain tumor and is blacking out. Eventually he comes to the realization that the killer is him. The film fails to try and hide who is the killer from the start and just about put me to sleep trying finish the film as I give it a ½ star.

 

Wer (DVD) – The film begins with a family hiking it out in the middle of rural France only to capture their vicious animal attack that killed the husband and kid and scarred the wife, Claire Porter. Immediately, local authorities bring in a very large hairy man that doesn’t talk much and lived with his mother nearby the attack. This gets the attention of an American Human Rights Lawyer, Kathrine, who has a practice there and wants to represent the very large hairy man, Talan. The local authorities disregard that only an animal could do the damage it did and this man Talan has a rare disease that affects his joints, bones, etc. So it seems like a slam dunk for the lawyer to get Talan off from this brutal murder. But tests keep coming up inconclusive; the police know more than they are saying and Kathrine and friends dig deeper into Talan and his family and find a history like no other. That’s when the movie gets even more interesting when Talan escapes and begins a city wide murder spree! A werewolf flick with a whole different spin on the werewolf legend in this American/French production that was shot in Romania. On top of that I loved the creature and blood effects in this entertaining and refreshing spin on the werewolf genre. I give the film 3 ½ stars.

 

Evil Bong 420 (DVD) – Who says, “You can go to the well too many times”? Apparently Charles Band ignores that phrase with this entry into the “Evil Bong” series. The film is a sequel of sorts to “Gingerdead Man vs. Evil Bong”, which the movie came inside a cereal box where the cereal tasted like a generic ‘Cookie Crisp’ in case you were not paying attention? Anyhow Sonny Davis’s character manages to break out of Eebee’s weed fog inside the bong reality and open up a topless bowling alley. Once, Charles Band makes sure all of the characters from both franchises made their appearances exception of Tommy Chong. Gingerdead Man makes his escape and Eebee is pissed as she comes back to take her revenge in capturing all who escaped. Thus setting up another sequel… I give it 1 star just for the mere reason I am still a fan of Charles Band, Sonny Davis, Robin Sydney, and David Decoteau made an appearance! Plus it doesn’t help the film come off as one long ad for Full Moon merch. Sorry Mr. Band you have a few websites for that.

 

Cyborg Cop III (DVD) – The film was originally called “Terminal Impact”. But honestly who is paying attention to that except for Jon Cross, maybe Ed Demko’s dad, and me? So Delta Tech builds cyborgs while a local news reporter is investigating this cyborg thing. She finds out about something she shouldn’t have and Delta Tech sends cyborgs after her. Lucky for her two lucky go happy bounty hunters happen to drive by and help her out. I give the flick 1 ½ stars.

insane-poster-art

Insane (Vimeo/DVD) – One of my favorite hard working independent filmmakers Massimilano Cerchi is back with his latest release, “Insane”. The film is about a hot young couple buy their dream home off the internet and pictures don’t do it justice. But of course the weird neighbor just happens to stroll by and tell the young couple they are pretty much “doomed” if they stay because of the history of the home. Michael’s girlfriend Sarah is completely pissed off and wants to know why the realtor didn’t tell them this before they bought it. Michael of course believes it isn’t a big deal until the weird neighbor begins telling Michael of the stories about the murders that happened there. Michael becomes obsessed and begins filming everything and documenting anything to find evidence of something possibly supernatural in his new home. But just like the weirdo neighbor says, “You might not like what you find?” The evil clown is a nice touch but Cerchi’s approach of stripping down the bloated paranormal genre with few characters, not a ton of dialogue, and allowing the scenes tell the story make this feature refreshing and fun. I’m still not a big paranormal film fan but it’s nice to see there are still some entertaining and creepy ideas from great filmmakers out there! I give the flick 3 out of 4 stars as you can find out more about the flick and Mr. Cerchi at: https://www.facebook.com/massimiliano.cerchi?fref=ts&ref=br_tf .

 

The Last Witch Hunter (DVD) – From the beginning this Vin Diesel flick could have been the next great horror film but internet geeks and word of mouth never allowed this movie to have a chance. Now saying that I am not saying this is one of the best movies out there I just believe anymore these days most movies don’t survive the harsh criticism of it before it is ever released. As I try to do if the movie exists I will give it a chance and that is what I did here. Vin Diesel plays a witch hunter who is not one by choice but becomes one after his family is murdered several hundreds of years ago and is guided by a man/priest given to him by the church. Michael Caine plays the latest who believes it is time to retire but wants to give Diesel’s character the full story of what the church is hiding. But he is killed, maybe? And Elijah Wood steps in to help or fuck shit up just to bring the original witch queen back from the dead. I wanted this movie to be so bad that I enjoyed it because of what I heard, example “Cursed” anyone? But it wasn’t… It’s not great but like I said, “it exists”. Maybe it would have been better without Vin Diesel as the ‘Last Witch Hunter’ and should have been a Rutger Hauer or Jeffery Combs? Who knows? But the point is at least watch the movie then decide if it’s as bad as a lot of people believe because I don’t as I give it 2 stars. This film just suffers from ‘never having a chance once thought went to paper’.

 

Appleseed: Alpha (DVD) – Another fun CG-animated sci-fi feature about a cyborg and his female partner just trying to make it in the wasteland and maybe save the world. The two are just trying to repay their debt to a shady guy who rules New York City. So when they go out the outskirts of the city to remove some unwanted cyborgs, they stumble across another cyborg and a girl who are traveling to complete a secret mission. The two unlikely couples decide to travel together but now have evil cyborgs and the shady dude from New York City trying to stop them from accomplishing their mission. These types of movies are fun stuff: “Resident Evil”, “Bio-Hunter”, etc. This is geeky, fun flick for someone like myself as I give it 2 ½ stars.

 

John Wick (DVD) – Keenau Reeves jumps feet first into the action genre about a man who just lost his wife and has a dog and a bad ass Ford Mustang. He gets the shit kicked out of him, his dog gets killed, and his classic car stolen by some dumb ass mob kid. When word gets around whose car the kid stole people begin to panic as John Wick used to be a hitman that was flawless and stopped at nothing to kill all he was suppose too. From there the bullets fly and John Wick kicks ass. Even though I enjoyed the film two things bothered me as I watched it and maybe I am just a product of the 80s (Rutger Hauer, Arnold, Sly, Dolph, even a Jason Statham) but it seemed like Keenau just didn’t fit the role. Also I felt they built up the John Wick character a lot and he is easily captured and beaten up! I give the film 3 stars.

The Survviors

The Survivors (The Hack Collection Volume One) (Blu-ray) – Well the talented independent filmmaker Steve Rudzinski finally granted my wish of doing a sequel to “Slasher Hunter” and did not disappoint at all. According to Steve, “it’s not just a sequel; it is a sequel to everything he has done.” If you have been following Mr. Rudzinski’s films they all have been leading to something or leave you wanting a little more and it all comes to this… Steve puts everything together in this latest project where ‘The Slashers’ are in complete disarray as Frank is in hell and they lack real leadership. Meanwhile, the group just known as “The Killers” is stronger than ever and keeps two steps ahead of the “Survivor Initiative” until now. “The Slasher Hunters” have some new allies (helps if you have seen some of Steve’s past films to understand some of the characters and why they are there) that includes one my favorite’s ‘Wolfster’. Wolfster is a character Steve came up with early in his filmmaking career I easily could have seen as a movie franchise with a new entry every 12 to 16 months? It all comes down to one final fight between The Slasher Initiative and The Killers leader Norm unless Frank finds a way out of hell? We also find out what was Frank’s worst mistake thanks to hell. This project is beyond hilarious, entertaining, and everything I have expected from such a talented filmmaker. Steve has a way of writing very likable characters good and evil that in my opinion makes him successful for the long haul. Steve this is one of the best independent projects I have seen in 2016 and hope to see a lot more as I give the film 4 out of 4 stars. The copy of “The Survivors” I have is part of “The Hack Collection Volume One” Blu-ray two-disc set that has bloopers, trailers, almost all of Steve’s movies and a lot more. Find out more about the film or purchase it at: www.silverspotlightfilms.moonfruit.com and https://www.facebook.com/SilverSpotlightFilms/?fref=ts&ref=br_tf .

 

Land of Doom (VHS/DVD-R) – A lesser known C-grade Wasteland film that looked like it used the leftovers from Fred Williamson’s Eye-talian films. The Peter Maris film has a woman named Harmony trying to make her way across the wasteland just trying to get away from everything only to meet up with a man who is trying to get these ‘raiders’ to believe they can rebuild. Cannibals, killer snakes, horrible motorcycles, and no real ending (Thanks Metalstorm) are the highlights of this film as I give it 1 ½ stars.

 

Marked (DVD) – Six years after a woman witnessed her father murdered and the murderer die in front of her is doing paranormal research for answers. Answers for what not totally sure but it is just another miserable entry into a bloated genre that is starting to rival the other bloated genre, ‘zombies’. I give it 0 stars.

 

Lost Souls (DVD) – A late 90s flick about John Savage, his wife, and kids just moved into a new home. His daughter happens to be autistic and some murdered children from years ago are trying to communicate through her after they find an old device in storage at the house. Every time the machine is turned on something paranormal happens. After a few twists and turns the family finds out it is the local sheriff with the murdering past. The movie was a TV movie that had a few showings on the now defunct channel UPN before going into obscure cheap paranormal DVD box sets. I give the film 2 stars.

 

Let Us Prey (DVD) – An Irish film about a new constable starting her job for a station in a small town. While walking the beat she witnesses a drunken kid run down a man. She takes the kid in but cannot find the man. Later the mysterious man is found by other officers and brought in to get a statement but refuses to speak but just stare. The mysterious no name man is put into a cell while they call a doctor and that is when things begin to get weird because anyone that is near the mysterious man knows their deep secrets. But what all inside the station don’t know he is there to collect souls before the stroke of midnight and everyone’s past comes back to haunt them in one way or another. The film starts slow but builds into a chaotic, bloody climax worth checking out. In the end, the movie starting off slow makes a lot of sense after watching it as this is one of those lesser known recent horror movies worth seeking out as I give it 4 stars.

 

The Gates of Hell 2: Dead Awakening (DVD) – Literally a sequel no one knew about and for good reason. From what I could stay awake for the film is very low budget and set in the early to mid-80s, never mind the dedication to Lucio Fulci. But anyway no zombies and barely demons on-screen that are brought forth by some stupid middle aged men who are also looking for a woman who has a medallion that is supposed to help them with conjuring some demons. The film was mostly shot in Fort Worth, Texas in 1986/1987 according to sketchy information I was able to dig up on it. But fuck it, the movie is so bad it shouldn’t exist so let’s stick with “Death Metal Zombies” and “Heavy Metal Massacre” for our fun bad stuff shall we? I give it 0 stars.

 

Indigenous (DVD) – The usual crap about stupid American college kids not listening and going to a waterfall in the middle of a dense jungle of Panama. Bad shit happened there supposedly but they don’t listen and go visit only to become dinner to a Chupacabra. But that’s when the movie gets interesting when a guy uploads his video to his social media and it goes viral within four hours causing a military to search for them and millions to watch on 24/7 news channels for their rescue. I liked the monster/Chupacabra looked like an extra form “The Descent” but I thought the movie was much better and interesting when the film took a serious turn in using social media as part of the storyline. Now, I thought if the movie would have continued that storyline instead of wasting storyline and film of the rich kids partying, bumping uglies, drinking, and repeat before they visit the Chupacabra? Then a lot more horror movie fans would be talking about and seeking out this monster flick. Sometime filmmakers it’s better to color outside the lines than keep coloring inside the lines of the same picture film in, film out. For that I give this movie 2 stars.

 

Any comments or questions please send to: GrossMovieReview@verizon.net, GrossMovieReview@aol.com or www.facebook.com/grossmoviereviews . Remember folks always support your local independent movie theater, independent video store, and independent filmmakers! It will keep horror alive………

You can always visit and see some past reviews, independent film news, or me ranting at: www.grossmoviereviews.com !!!

Don’t forget you can also hear Kyle Poling and me talking about horror flicks on a weekly basis on the Bloodbaths and Boomsticks podcast at: www.bloodbathspodcast.blogspot.com/

Plus you can always go to the greatest T-shirt place online or if you are in Texas visit the store of “Fast Custom Shirts” where T-shirt Joe is the only place you should purchase your horror T-shirts: Go to www.fastcustomshirts.com for details.

Don’t forget you can come by the vendor table I will be at for a book, shirt, or a movie March 4, 5, 6th, 2016 at Pittsburgh’s Horror Realm Convention (for details: www.horrorrealmcon.com) and Cinema Wasteland April 1, 2, 3rd, 2016 in Strongsville, Ohio (for details: www.cinemawasteland.com) .

Gross Movie Reviews #370

0
Posted on by

Gross Movie Reviews #370

 

By Tim Gross

 

Sorceress (DVD) – Jim Wynorski and Jack Hill added their two cents to the fantasy world in 1982 with this lower budgeted gem. Twin daughters are born and the evil wizard Traigon demands that the first born be sacrificed. But unsure which was born first wants both put to death while torturing the mother. “The Two that are One” are saved from the evil wizard and Traigon spends the next twenty years searching for them as they spend their days getting naked and punching centaurs in the face. Once Traigon knows their whereabouts we got all kinds of shit going including zombie warriors showing up to the party! It is no “Sword and the Sorcerer” but the fantasy film is still a lot of fun to watch as I give it 2 ½ stars.

Demon Queen

Demon Queen (DVD) – One of Donald Farmer’s first films is a mostly incoherent S.O.V. film from 1986 that has a female vamp named Lucinda eating her way through the city or men. Depending how you look at it. The film doesn’t really have a beginning or ending but just exists which is kinda cool in retrospect. If interested www.massacrevideo.com just put together a special edition of the film for DVD which I am sure is well-produced as usual. I give the flick 2 stars. If it helps there is a wonderful face-melting effect in the film.

Scream Dream

Scream Dream (VHS/DVD-R) – A couple films later Donald Farmer puts together a much better S.O.V. film that deals with an evil demon-like rock singer named Michelle Shock. Film has an amazing opening as we get to witness a woman being split in half by a chainsaw. Michelle Shock just happens to be the next hottest thing happening in rock music and strange shit happens around her constantly. You soon find out why when Michelle goes down on a male fan and turns into a demon and bites off his junk! Ms. Shock continues her murder spree as management denies everything and news outlets begin to investigate missing persons on nights of her shows. Not wanting to deal with it any longer the record producer fires Michelle Shock to hire a new fresh face. Jamie is the fresh face but just becomes the next meat suit for the demon when she searches out Michelle Shock. A demon, gore, and boobs sum up this fun indy flick. I give it 3 stars.

 

Amazonia (DVD) – The 1985 film is considered the last of the Eye-talian cannibal films by some but also known as “Cannibal Holocaust 2”, “White Slave”, and “The Catherine Miles Story”. The film claims to be a faithful reconstruction of what happened to Miss Miles over ten years ago. When Catherine was 18 she went into the Amazon with her parents only to be murdered and Catherine to be kidnapped by a tribe. For over the next year she spent her time being tortured and forced to be a part of the tribe that kidnapped her. But after finding out the horrible truth she goes on a bloody rampage. And the story is told from Catherine in court justifying what happened to her and her actions afterwards. Bloody but not as disturbing for most as a “Cannibal Holocaust” but an interesting watch to say the least. The movie is out on DVD in America but is considered an out of print collector’s item. I give the film 3 stars.

 

Mark of the Devil II (VHS/DVD-R) – The 1973 Austrian/German production is a sequel to the famous cult classic starring Udo Kier. The story follows Countess Elizabeth Von Solmenau and her family being ripped a part because she is accused of witchcraft by a madman named Balthasar Von Ross who killed hundreds of women for their belief in witchcraft. Lots Satan talk, shaving witches, people’s feet being burned, and a seven year old that is accused of becoming a werewolf because of witchcraft! Fun stuff, but interesting enough I cannot find any print of the film on any format after 1986. And I believe the copy I watched is a several generation VHS to DVD-R copy and been told there isn’t a lot of good looking copies out there to begin with? So movie geeks happy hunting as I give it 2 stars.

 

A Serbian Film (DVD) – A retired male porn star is offered an offer of a lifetime. An offer that will set up his family for the rest of their lives. But of course that is never true as he goes down the down rabbit hole of working with this so-called porn-artist. And the film just goes into the world of sick, disturbing acts that you cannot unwatch. The film is well produced but that is where I stop my praise of the film mainly because I am a monsters and slasher film guy. The subject matter is harsh to say the least and as I said before you cannot unwatch this film after you have watched it. Good or bad this film will find its audience for years to come and not sure I can give this film a fair rating. Sure this review may piss off a few of the fans of this film but hey I am part of the cool crowd I finally watched it! Still haven’t figured out if that was a good thing or not?

 

The Last Horror Film (DVD) – An odd slasher/serial killer of celebrities flick that stars Joe Spinell and Caroline Munro from 1981. Joe is Vinny Duran, a cab driver with big dreams of going to the Cannes Film Festival meeting his favorite actress Jana Bates and making his movie. Thing is Vinny is what we would call a stalker these days and will stop at nothing to meet Jana and tell her about his script. But friends of Jana are showing up dead and all fingers point to Vinny. And the very last 30 seconds of the film is the greatest as I miss an actor like Joe Spinell. I give the flick 3 stars.

 

At the Earth’s Core (DVD) – Peter Cushing and Doug McClure have built a machine that can dig through dirt at a quick pace at hopes of discovering something new under the earth’s crust. But what they find is much more as they find a whole new world in the outer and inner core of earth. Which of course includes Caroline Munro and friends being slaves, to some weird dinosaur birds that hang glide? And things that keep the cave people in line to do their bidding or just keep the magma from flooding the city and killing them all. A wonderful and mildly entertaining mid-70s flick which has Peter Cushing not in his usual serious role. I am sure at some point this film was a staple for early 80s horror hosts as I give the film 2 ½ stars. The film just recently got a really awesome looking Blu-ray well worth the cash.

 

The Fear Chamber (DVD) – A lesser known film about a police chief played by Steven Williams who puts his best detective on a case of a guy (Richard Tyson) who plays doctor with female victims he kidnaps. The detective almost catches him in the act but is stabbed in the chest and gets a heart transplant. Now he sees female ghosts who give him clues of how to find the evil doctor and his next victims. I like the ending that ties up the loose ends of the story. Not first movie I would go rent but definitely something to keep for a rainy day if interested as I give it 2 ½ stars.

 

Any comments or questions please send to: GrossMovieReview@verizon.net, GrossMovieReview@aol.com or www.facebook.com/grossmoviereviews . Remember folks always support your local independent movie theater, independent video store, and independent filmmakers! It will keep horror alive………

You can always visit and see some past reviews, independent film news, or me ranting at: www.grossmoviereviews.com !!!

Don’t forget you can also hear Kyle Poling and me talking about horror flicks on a weekly basis on the Bloodbaths and Boomsticks podcast at: www.bloodbathspodcast.blogspot.com/

Plus you can always go to the greatest T-shirt place online or if you are in Texas visit the store of “Fast Custom Shirts” where T-shirt Joe is the only place you should purchase your horror T-shirts: Go to www.fastcustomshirts.com for details.

Don’t forget you can come by the vendor table I will be at for a book, shirt, or a movie March 4, 5, 6th, 2016 at Pittsburgh’s Horror Realm Convention (for details: www.horrorrealmcon.com) and Cinema Wasteland April 1, 2, 3rd, 2016 in Strongsville, Ohio (for details: www.cinemawasteland.com) .

Horror Realm deal for those interested in getting my book!

0
Posted on by

Hr

 

I will most likely repost this the week of the show but for anybody interested in buying a copy of my book Gross Movie Reviews: The Wrath of Gross

Wrath of Gross color

You can get $5 off a copy if you make a purchase at our table. A movie, shirt, etc. So instead of $30 it would be $25 if you buy a copy of Jagoff Massacre, a movie, or a T-shirt! And yes there will be Jagoff Massacre shirts available and the first time in a long time there will be a limited amount of Gross Movie Reviews T-shirts available!

GMR shirtThanks to T-shirt Joe at http://www.fastcustomshirts.com and will also be at Horror Realm with a full table of horror shirts available for you!

Gross Movie Reviews #369

0
Posted on by

Gross Movie Reviews #369

 

By Tim Gross

 

Garm Wars: The Last Druid (DVD) – A fantasy animation/live action film that stars Lance Henriksen as ‘the last druid’ who may know of a place that puts an end to the war between pacts. The Garm’s motto for so many years no one knows when it started is: fight, die, and download. The last two pacts want the druid as he is all powerful and his power can end the war. But two unlikely allies follow the last druid to an unknown destination wanting more than just constant war. The film also stars Kevin Durand who is getting pretty famous right now for being the smart exterminator fighting vamps on FX’s “The Strain”. Ultra-weird film that cannot be classified but something weird enough to allow yourself to be sucked into the worm hole the film is at least once as I give it 2 stars.

 

A Night to Dismember (DVD) – An awful slasher film is an understatement. The film was released in 1983 even though it was finished five years before that. This is an example of the stories behind it are way better than the film itself including scenes being done in Doris Wishman’s living room and someone just ruining the editing on purpose. Hell, a book could be written on why the film turned out to be so awful! But anyway Vicki Kent is released from the local asylum after five years and bodies begin to pile up again. If anything everyone should have the chance to do their own commentary to this film? I give this awful film with an unbelievable and interesting backstory as I give it 0 stars. But do yourself a favor and go look this title up and just keep reading it is stories you could not make up if you wanted too.

 

Monsters (DVD) – Six years ago during a NASA mission a satellite/ship was bringing back signs of alien life that happen to break up during reentry and falling on parts of Mexico. Now present day and half of Mexico has been quarantined as alien life as taken root and both American and Mexican militaries are trying to stop the spread of the monsters. A reporter who just happens to be near the infected zone in Mexico covering it is ordered by his boss to escort the boss’s daughter to the US border if he wants to keep his job. After a night of partying they are robbed and lost their passports. They now have no choice but to travel through the quarantined zone to get home. It’s like “Cloverfield” without the ‘shaking cam’ combined with creatures from “The Mist”. I do agree with most I thought there could be more monsters and maybe a better storyline than these two trying to find themselves in the ‘infected zone’. But the film is worth wasting 90 minutes watching as it’s not a bad alternative compared to some of the recent alien/monster films that have been released. I give the flick 2 ½ stars.

 

Avengers: Age of Ultron (DVD) – Well Avengers are having a hard time working together in keeping world peace until one of Tony Stark’s creations has gone rogue and has formed ‘Ultron’. The film keeps the storyline moving for all the characters but nowhere near as fun as the first “Avengers” film. It’s filler until the “Civil War” saga just like the “Thor” and “Captain America” sequels. But I know this I will keep watching them as long as they keep making them. I give it 2 ½ stars.

maxresdefault

From Parts Unknown (DVD) – We begin with zombies overtaking a small underground facility with lots of screaming and yelling. Then we see a little girl named Charlie watch her father (a masked wrestler) be decapitated in the wrestling ring. The story moves to present time showing Charlie is all grown up and wrestling in PCW under the name “Daddy’s Girl”. She is living her dream and carrying on the tradition of her father but her day job at the evil video game company sucks. As they want world domination with their newly stolen Nano-bots that will take over young minds of gamers make them give the company all their money… supposedly? The Nano-bots would be in this new wrestling game they are about to unleash on the gaming world. The job sucks so bad they fire Charlie which leads her to try suicide (walking in front of oncoming cars) but is save by her best friend. Thus helping Charlie magically finding her wrestling family and with their combine powers must stop the worldwide download and kill all the zombies in and out of the wrestling ring! Chaotic, bloody, it’s from Australia (which usually means horror movie gold to me) and it feels like Peter Jackson’s “Bad Taste” had a movie baby! Yeah the film is a little rough around the edges but will get better with age as I give this amazing fun wrestling/horror film 3 out of 4 stars. You can purchase and find out a lot more about the film at www.alternativecinema.com .

Erin-Russ-interview-5

Upsidedown Cross (DVD) – This well-thought out depressing feature is about a young lady named Nadine who is brilliantly played by Erin Russ. Nadine has a modeling career going if that is what you want to call it as her so-called boyfriend Victor shoots her up with drugs so she can have pictures taken of her by dirty old dudes who don’t have cell phones (wait I don’t have a cell phone?). Anyway a gentleman talks her into touching him, sort of? And that’s when Victor and others are being arrested. Nowhere to go Nadine goes back home where mom seems to have lost touch with reality and relies on TV preachers for her medicine to get through the day. Nadine truly wants to kick the drug habit but Nadine and her mom are complete opposites and with great direction Nadine comes off as a dirty cunt rag when arguing with her mom about money, drugs, life. Delaih, Nadine’s mom takes it one step further by calling one of the crazy preacher numbers and they are visited by an older man who claims to be a traveling preacher who travels around the country to stop the devil’s work. The preacher played sadistically by David Yow believes they need to rid Nadine of her demons as she is possessed and this is what makes her a sex and drug addict. Some uncomfortable scenes happen between Nadine and the preacher that leaves Nadine looking more abused than ever but mom only wants to know “Has the demons left you”. The film is a little uncomfortable, depressing, and one of the more interesting films I have watched in recent memory. Erin Russ played the Nadine character perfectly; you hated her and truly feel bad for her in the span of 90 minutes. Loved the fake infomercials they just added to the intensity of the film. Usually I am the guy who watches sequels, zombies, and monster films all day but this film hit a weird nerve in me that made me glad I watched this very dark film. I give the movie 3 out of 4 stars. You can purchase and find out more about the film at www.alternativecinema.com .

Samurai_Cop_2_(2015)_Theatrical_Poster

Samurai Cop 2: Deadly Vengeance (DVD/Vimeo) – 25 years have passed but according to the head of the Katana the man they have feared but thought was dead has returned and that is Joe Marshall. But first they must contend with Joe’s former partner Frank Washington who is still fighting the good fight against the Katana and the other clans. But what Frank doesn’t know is that the Katana wants it all and willing to start a clan war. Frank investigates the medallions left behind at the murders or fallout from the war and it leads him to Joe Marshall where they talk it out and join forces. But even before they can get off the plane to L.A. they are attacked by the Katana knowing Joe can bring the clan down. Lots of chaotic fights, naked boobs, naked women with swords in dreams, and quite a few weird faces from Frank all leads to Joe Marshall frustrated and wanting to take on the whole Katana lair alone! The film not only has Matthew Karedas and Mark Frazer reprising their roles, but we have independent film legend Joe Estevez as Captain Harmon and legendary cult movie villain, Mel Novak, of Black Belt Jones, Bruce Lee’s Game of Death, Chuck Norris’ An Eye for An Eye and noted actress Laurene Landon of Hundra, Maniac Cop 1 and 2. The film also has a great tagline: They thought he was dead. He was just coolin’ off. This A-grade cheese just like the original and even makes you feel like you are still in the early 90s watching this entertaining flick as I give it 2 ½ out of 4 stars.

 

Hunter: Future Cop (DVD/Vimeo) – Ramsey Hunter has issues a lot like this movie. Ramsey has a random serial killer living with him, a trainee of his that has become a cop killer, and Ramsey is being blackmailed. Just when it couldn’t get any worse for the detective almost all government agencies are involved in all his cases now. At best the film is incoherent as Ron Becks tries his hardest to portray a detective role that has been phased out of films. The movie doesn’t make a lot of sense as Becks’ character jumps from scene to scene for no good reason. The “Samurai Cop” sequel has a certain cheese, B-movie quality to it as it does not take itself serious. But this film at times tries to take itself serious but doesn’t have a clue what script it wants to use as the film seems to be five film ideas smashed into one to make a full feature. Sadly I must give this film 0 out of 4 stars.

 

Old 37 (DVD) – Kane Hodder and Bill Moseley are two brothers who are keeping the tradition of removing accident victims from Ash Pine Road before the real authorities get there. They are only doing what their daddy had taught them long ago, they are paramedics. And that’s where this film completely jumps off the rails and becomes a piece of unwatchable crap. I like Kane and Bill but this seems like a poor choice by their agents or they got paid very well especially since Alan Simthee took the director’s credit. The movie seems like two different projects at times which could explain what’s wrong with it but people stop wasting talent like Kane and Bill in a movie that should have never been made as I give the movie 0 stars.

 

Any comments or questions please send to: GrossMovieReview@verizon.net, GrossMovieReview@aol.com or www.facebook.com/grossmoviereviews . Remember folks always support your local independent movie theater, independent video store, and independent filmmakers! It will keep horror alive………

You can always visit and see some past reviews, independent film news, or me ranting at: www.grossmoviereviews.com !!!

Don’t forget you can also hear Kyle Poling and me talking about horror flicks on a weekly basis on the Bloodbaths and Boomsticks podcast at: www.bloodbathspodcast.blogspot.com/

Plus you can always go to the greatest T-shirt place online or if you are in Texas visit the store of “Fast Custom Shirts” where T-shirt Joe is the only place you should purchase your horror T-shirts: Go to www.fastcustomshirts.com for details.

Don’t forget you can come by the vendor table I will be at for a book, shirt, or a movie March 4, 5, 6th, 2016 at Pittsburgh’s Horror Realm Convention (for details: www.horrorrealmcon.com) and Cinema Wasteland April 1, 2, 3rd, 2016 in Strongsville, Ohio (for details: www.cinemawasteland.com) .

Gross Movie Reviews #368

0
Posted on by

Gross Movie Reviews #368

 

By Tim Gross

 

Deep Blood (YouTube) – Hey, I found a Joe D’Amato shark movie from 1989. A set of young friends make a pact and bury knives in the sand during a bonding experience. Years later the friends are older and forgotten the pact until a generic version of “Jaws” begins to play out and one of their friends is eaten. So they dig up the knives, hire a boat, and vow to kill the shark! Folks its bad, the kinda bad where it would only be good if you are drunk with friends and doing a commentary to it… Wait, I have an idea? Until then I give it 1 star.

 

Android Cop (DVD) – Michael Jai White and Charles Dutton are the latest victims to star in a bootleg version of the “Robocop” remake. Yep, you read that correctly cinema fans. Its 2037 or 2045, trailer and the film conflict so who fucking knows but Mr. White is forced to have a new partner after his old one is killed and it happens to be an android. On a mission for justice of saving the mayor’s daughter the two are screwed over by their department and must go through gang territory to survive. I want the time back that I wasted on watching this flick and I feel horrible for Michael Jai-White for being in this flick. I give the horrible flick 0 stars.

 

Star Wars: The Force Awakens (Theater) – Can’t be any worse than the prequels so I was in from the beginning as there is a new disturbance in the force. A new evil wants to pick up where Darth Vader left off and everyone is looking for Luke Skywalker as he just disappeared. I do not want to give too much away because I still feel a movie like this should be experienced. Allow that inner child to escape for two hours. It’s a popcorn flick. Not as good as the original but a lot of fun and a great set up of what is to come. I give the flick 3 stars.

 

Man on Fire (VHS/You Tube) – Before Denzel’s remake in 2004 there was this Italian version from 1987 that starred Scott Glenn. The film also based on the book is about a former CIA agent John Creasy, who is hired to project a young teenage girl. With the parents not around much he becomes best friends with her and soon cares about her when he did not want too. The film also stars Joe Pesci, Brooke Adams, Danny Aiello, and Jonathan Pryce. The film is kinda middle of the road as it never seems to get off the ground in the excitement department but still interesting enough story that keeps you watching till the end of the film. I give it 2 stars.

 

Goodnight Mommy (On Demand) – A German/Austria film about a mom coming home to her boys or boy. Hard to explain but you figure it out within the first thirty seconds. But anyway mom comes home after surgery and the boys claim it’s not their real mom. A lot of boring shit happens that include the boys testing the woman to be sure it’s their mom with an uneventful ending. This bag of poo almost made me say “goodnight” a few times trying to push through the film. I give it 0 stars.

 

Savage Weekend (DVD) – A slasher film that was made in 1976 under the title “The Killer behind the Mask” but was later released in 1979 by Cannon Films under the title “Savage Weekend”. It stars William Sanderson from “Newhart” TV show fame and a very young girl by the name of Yancy Butler. Some couples get together at a cabin for the weekend to watch a boat being built. But of course this bores everyone and we get a lot of sex with Sanderson’s character, ‘Otis’ staring at them creepily. Of course the film immediately points to Otis being the killer but he is too busy staring at all the sex going on around him. But what pisses me off about the film is a scene where a woman is tied up to a table saw and it’s turned on… Nothing! No gore, blood, etc., it failed horribly in having a great memorable death scene. I give the film 1 1/2 stars.

 

Dust Up (DVD) – A one-eyed handyman named Jack is helping out a pretty mom played by Amber Benson/Ella because her plumbing is shot. We soon see why she is alone and has trouble paying Jack because her drug addicted husband is looking to give guys blowjobs for money he owes to his drug dealer or he will be killed that night. Jack being the nice guy he is decides to try and help and give so much of the cash up for the husband’s debt. One thing leads to another and we have shootings, drug labs blowing up, weird Indian dances, and a druglord that convinces his party goers to be cannibals because the end of the world is going to happen! It’s weird, hard to explain, but visually cool, entertaining, and seems to be a independent flick lost from the mid-90s when the flood gates opened up for all genres of small budgeted films. I give it 3 stars.

Collective

The Collective Volume VII (DVD) – The long running independent collection of short films, ten of them to be exact all are on one subject. I always enjoy picking up a new installment of this because it not only shows off the talent of all that are involved but I know Jason Hoover is still working hard out there on his craft. This time around the subject is “a key”. All involved this time around: Mostly Harmless Pictures, Jabb Pictures (of course), Quattro Venti Scott Productions, John Eric Ballinger, Liberty or Death Productions, Death Hug Films, Spiral Filmworks, Silence in the Dead of Light, Klayton Dean, 3 o’clock Productions. I really enjoyed the short from “Silence in the Dead of Light” called ‘Open Me’ as it told the story with no dialogue. I also enjoyed Jason Hoover killing himself off in a scene for the short ‘Bluebird’. There was a short that is a recut/re-edit of “Night of the Living Dead” 1968 version that I understood why it was done but in the long run I did not. But that is a whole other conversation piece that could cover pages, hours, etc. Mr. Hoover and company should be proud as usual as I give this collection 3 out of 4 stars and can be found for purchase at www.jabbpictures.com .

 

Believers (DVD) – Two paramedics get mixed up with a cult when they respond to a call from a little girl wanting help for her mommy as she is unresponsive. The paramedics are held at gunpoint and taken to an underground compound by people who call themselves ‘The Quanta Group’. The cult believes the end of the world is upon us and after their mass suicide aka their sleep they will be transferred to the other side of the universe to restart humanity. The theory is they are scientists, mathematicians, etc. who have left their past lives done research and believe fire will fall from the sky killing almost everything in its existence. I like the concept but the ending is one of those things that you want more information or a couple more scenes. I give the flick 2 stars.

 

Defenseless: A Blood Symphony (DVD) – An Australian film I believe made in 2004 by Mark Savage but released in 2006. The film is told with no dialogue at all but music and actions. A woman is raped, abused, and left out in the sea to die after she disagrees on signing off on a real estate deal. So her partners decide to do this sicken act to her. She reappears from the sea helped by a little girl and begins her weird bloody revenge/rampage through her partners. Weird, different, a little nutzoid, I am in every time to watch something off the beaten path like this. It’s available through Subversive Cinema if interested and give it 2 ½ out of 4 stars.

 

Any comments or questions please send to: GrossMovieReview@verizon.net, GrossMovieReview@aol.com or www.facebook.com/grossmoviereviews . Remember folks always support your local independent movie theater, independent video store, and independent filmmakers! It will keep horror alive………

You can always visit and see some past reviews, independent film news, or me ranting at: www.grossmoviereviews.com !!!

Don’t forget you can also hear Kyle Poling and me talking about horror flicks on a weekly basis on the Bloodbaths and Boomsticks podcast at: www.bloodbathspodcast.blogspot.com/

Plus you can always go to the greatest T-shirt place online or if you are in Texas visit the store of “Fast Custom Shirts” where T-shirt Joe is the only place you should purchase your horror T-shirts: Go to www.fastcustomshirts.com for details.

Don’t forget you can come by the vendor table I will be at for a book, shirt, or a movie March 4, 5, 6th, 2016 at Pittsburgh’s Horror Realm Convention (for details: www.horrorrealmcon.com) and Cinema Wasteland April 1, 2, 3rd, 2016 in Strongsville, Ohio (for details: www.cinemawasteland.com) .

A special treat for commentary fans from Bloodbaths and Boomsticks!

0
Posted on by

Once again we are joined by our buddy and new dad RICK OF THE DEAD to do a fan commentary for the BMX flick RAD. so listen and see what professional wrestlers and serial killers we see in the background. we also got chicks  with dudes voices, dudes in chicks clothing, doughnut men, skeevy business men, drunk mayors, Mr. Hand, sexually explicit little sisters, ass slides, and Aunt Becky. ENJOY!!!

http://www.bloodbathspodcast.blogspot.com/

 rad

The countdown has begun horror fans… it’s coming!

1
Posted on by

Our annual spring show debuts at a new home – the Doubletree By Hilton Greentree!

 

 This will be the ONLY Horror Realm convention of 2016 so don’t miss it!

 Hr

 Guests include:

 – Return of the Living Dead cast members:

ROTLD

 – Clu Gulager (Burt)

 – John Philbin (Chuck)

 – Brian Peck (Scuz)

 – Jewel Shepard (Casey)

 – Linnea Quigley (Trash)

 – Thom Mathews (Freddy)

 – Alan Trautman (Tarman)

 – Beverly Randolph (Tina)

 

Nightmare

 – Nightmare on Elm Street franchise cast members

 – Tuesday Knight (NOES 4: The Dream Master & New Nightmare)

 – Brooke Bundy (NOES 3: Dream Warriors & NOES 4)

 – Ken Sagoes (NOES 3 & NOES 4)

 – Beatrice Boepple (NOES 5: The Dream Child)

 – Erika Anderson (NOES 5)

 

 – Ken Foree (Dawn of the Dead, The Devil’s Rejects)

 – Tiffany Shepis (Sharknado 2, Tromeo & Juliet, Nightmare Man)

 – Mia Shepis (Tales of Halloween)

 – Diane Ayala Goldner (Feast II & III, Rob Zombie’s Halloween II)

 – Felissa Rose (Sleepaway Camp)

 – Author Mord McGhee (Murder Red Ink, Old Flames and Heroes)

 – Dan Kamin (Creepshow 2, Chaplin impersonator)

 – John Russo (Night of the Living Dead, My Uncle John is a Zombie)

 – Erin Brown aka Misty Mundae (Shock-O-Rama, Midnight Massacre)

 – Steve Rudzinski (Silver Spotlight Films)

 – Amy Lynn Best & Mike Watt (Happy Cloud Pictures)

 – Fred & Shelby Vogel (ToeTag)

 

 Ticket levels:

 – VIP – $100 – must be purchased in advance and limited to 50. Includes:

 One weekend pass

 Horror Realm tote bag with lots of goodies

 Horror Realm shot glass

 Souvenir badge with lanyard

 Exclusive limited edition convention poster

 T-shirt

 Priority seating at all panels

 Exclusive VIP party with open bar & appetizers

 

 – Weekend -$40

 – Friday – $15

 – Saturday – $20

 – Sunday – $10

 – Kids 12 and under are free with an adult admission.

 – Free single day admission for active duty military & veterans with valid ID.

 

 All ticket sales are final – no refunds

 

 Horror Realm moves to the Double Tree by Hilton Pittsburgh Green Tree hotel in 2016! Conveniently located at 500 Mansfield Avenue, Pittsburgh, PA 15205 off the Green Tree exit of I-376 (Parkway West), this three-star hotel features:

 • Ample free parking

 • Pets allowed ($50 non-refundable deposit)

 • Indoor pool & whirlpool

 • On-site convenience store & snack shop

 • Chocolate chip cookies for registered guests

 • Complimentary hotel shuttle to Pittsburgh International Airport

 

 We have a very special group rate of $109 plus tax per night (regularly $154 and up). You can reserve your room now at the link below or by calling 412-922-8400 and mentioning group code HRP.

 

http://doubletree.hilton.com/en/dt/groups/personalized/P/PITGTDT-HRP-20160304/index.jhtml

 

 Please visit Horror Realm’s web site (www.horrorrealmcon.com) for the hotel’s terms & conditions.

Gross Movie Reviews #367

0
Posted on by

Gross Movie Reviews #367

 

By Tim Gross

 

The Hybrid (DVD) – A film based in Russia where a man gets a chance to get out of prison if he leads a group of mercenaries and a scientist into a heavily guarded facility that happens to be underground in middle of Russia. They need the information and hosts from an experiment that involves alien DNA from rocks and human DNA. It’s an Old Russian experiment that was never shut down and some dark government personal want it now. Not too horrible of a sci-fi film but it has tons of issues like introducing characters and never going back to them??? But anyway if you pass over this one I totally understand as I give it 1 star.

 

Bone Tomahawk (On Demand) – Sid Haig and David Arquette are two unlikely criminals who happen to piss off some Indian/cannibal/troglodytes by walking through on their burial ground. Haig’s character is killed off and Arquette finds a small town Bright Hope looking just for a drink. Once questioned by the sheriff aka shot in the leg and the troglodytes or as I like to call them “chocodiles” (https://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Chocodile_Twinkie use the link wisely to understand the yinzer coming out of my mouth) come to town and steal David and Patrick Wilson’s wife and butcher a couple people. So the sheriff and three others make the dangerous trek to where these things or chocodiles live in order to save Wilson’s wife. To give the film that more fun impact the sheriff talks to a Native American man who explains the troglodytes and explains why even the Indians are afraid of these oddities. The western gets a little long when the main characters travel but gets down right fucking brutal when the four come upon the troglodytes cave. A solid western and great to see Kurt Russell back to acting full time again as I give the film 3 stars.

MPW-83355

Blood Frenzy (VHS/DVD-R) – A 1987 low budget slasher film of sorts where a doctor decides to take her six patients to the desert for therapy. Or we don’t have much of a budget so we are doing most of the movie in one location and shooting in five days… just saying. Things go terribly wrong one night when the patients wake up to one of them with their throat cut. Soon everyone is blaming everyone and the RV does not work any longer. Is it one of the crazies? Or is it something else? The film not watched by many but if you wondered the aisles of a ma and pa video store you most likely at least seen the bloody jack-in-the-box VHS cover. I give the film 1 ½ stars.

 

The Hateful Eight (Theater) – A bounty hunter is traveling to Red Rock through the snowy mountains being chased by another snow storm with a woman who he had captured and is seeing to hang. And this is a tale of how it all goes wrong as his wagon is stopped a couple times to pick up two travelers who are trying to escaped the snow storm and must stop  at a cabin to settle for a couple days for the storm to pass by. Problem gets worse as there are a few more men waiting at the cabin like the others trying to escape the snow storm. The landscape is amazing, the characters are fun and interesting, and the music is awesome. The cast consists of Kurt Russell, Samuel L. Jackson, Jennifer Jason Leigh, Tim Roth, Michael Madsen, Bruce Dern, and Channing Tatum. Not the best western ever made but just like “Bone Tomahawk” I enjoy it for what it is as I give it 3 stars. And the gore flows freely throughout the flick.

 

Insidious 3 or Chapter 3 (DVD) – The movie is pretty much what you already know about the Lin Shaye psychic character. But just in case you were bored and didn’t catch on to this cheap cash-in, instead of moving the franchise forward they give you a prequel of why and how Miss Shaye’s character is back in the psychic business. I give the film 1 star.

 

Deadly Dreams (VHS/DVD-R) – Another lesser known horror film from 1988 about a college kid named Alex who is haunted by a man in a wolf mask who killed his parents over a decade ago. The man who was in the mask over a decade ago named Perkins killed himself shortly after but someone is back haunting Alex in reality and his dreams and is losing his grip of both. But not before Alex gets ahold of some redheaded boobage. I give the film 2 stars.

 

Scouts Guide to the Zombie Apocalypse (On Demand) – If you are a fan of “Zombieland” then you will be a fan of this hilarious tale of three scouts who must save their town from certain extinction. Three high school sophomores are on their usually Friday night campout where two of them are going to sneak off to their first high school party. But a zombie apocalypse gets in the way of that as several weird things begin to happen: dead deer gets up and leaves after being hit with their car, their scout master doesn’t show up at the camp out, zombie strippers, and the town has been evacuated. From there it is scene after scene of hilarious bloody zombies and zombie cats chasing the scouts. But if they do not get to the compound where people been evacuated too the town will be burned down by the military. I enjoyed the film because it centers on the scouts and that a certain point in your life the scouts are not fun anymore. And this just happens to take place when a zombie outbreak happened. I was a scout for a few years and like “Dogma” this film hits that soft spot in my heart so I thought it was a fun mess to watch over and over again as I give it 3 ½ stars.

 

The Janitor (DVD) – So after 13 bizarre deaths in the Generico offices the FBI is finally stepping in to try and solve who is murdering all the employees. Meanwhile, Lionel – The Janitor is angry but lives for his job and has been living in the janitor closet with his friend Mr. Growbo because their house burned down. But after Lionel’s office crush has quit her job he wants more: a relationship, a woman, a janitor’s job at the local sorority. But when Mr. Growbo screws Lionel out of the custodian job at the local sorority house Lionel wants revenge and there can be only one janitor. Pay close attention to the end of the film as you see a younger Judah Friedlander make an appearance screaming at Lionel. I give the film 2 stars.

 

Black Sea (DVD) – Jude Law stars in a very suspenseful film where he is fired from his submarine salvaging job and has nowhere to turn. But a best friend has an idea of what he could do if they can find an investor. Has Law’s character knows about a sunken Nazi U-boat that was filled with Nazi gold but is in international waters and no salvaging company wants to touch it. So after getting someone to invest into the mission Jude Law puts together a crew of misfits that just may pull off salvage like no other before that would set them all up for life. Well-acted and the suspense make this lesser known film a must watch for any cinema fans as I give it a well-deserved 3 ½ stars.

 

Extinction (DVD) – A zombie film, excuse me a viral outbreak film that just happens to star Matthew Fox and one of my favorite actors Jeffrey Donovan. Nine years ago the two were on a bus being taken to a safe zone by military until the shit hit the fan and all were attacked by the infected. Mathew Fox has a daughter that we see now in the snowy background is being taken care of by his brother played by Jeffery Donovan. It’s been years since the last infected sighting and the brothers refuse to communicate with each other even though they live next door to each other. But one day after a food run Mathew Fox’s character is attacked by a mutation? Is it an infected, human, they leave that one out there for you the viewer to decide and if bitten you do not change like before… You just get torn to pieces. These mutations are smarter, able to call to each other, and they can heal if not shot in the head. If there was a movie I could compare this flick to it would the recent Viggo flick called “The Road”. An interesting take on the zombie bloated genre that is worth taking a chance on especially with almost no advertising about the film. I give it 3 stars.

 

Evil Town (VHS/DVD-R) – A film that was released in 1987 but started film production in 1977 that stars James Keach. “Evil Town” had four different directors, footage of a Playboy Playmate running around nude added in 1985 for selling points, rumored to be three films put together as when they went to do reshoots certain characters died in real life, and the film was also titled at one point: “God Bless Grandma and Grandpa”. Saying all of that the film boils down to a town called, ‘Smalltown’, where travelers and hitchhikers go to disappear. Mainly because a scientist working off the books experiment that deals with anti-aging and the whole town is in on it as they are all over the age of 90! Weird film, bizarre history of the film being made, equals bad movie night at a horror fan’s home in the future as I give it 1 ½ stars just for being so god damn interesting.

 

P2: A New Level in Terror (DVD) – Angela is a high-level corporate employee working late on Christmas Eve. She believes she is the last to leave until a security guard tries to assist. Not paying attention Angela finds herself locked in the building and soon chained to a chair in the security office where this guard (Wes Bentley) is a stalker. From there the film uses the old cat and mouse formula. For me the film isn’t bad as much not as interesting as a “Road Games” or “Duel” or even the segment starring Lance Henriksen in “Nightmares”? But that is just me but I still give the suspenseful film 2 stars.

 

Tobe Hooper’s Night Terrors (VHS) – Robert Englund stars as the 4th century Marquis De Sade of which a cult is based on his book that shows up in Alexandria, Egypt 1993. Pretty much a bad movie I believe that was made for Showtime originally? Zoe Trilling plays a young woman named Genie who visits her father who happens to be an archeologist and she falls to a cult that is preparing her for those who believe. It’s weird and awful mostly, but Zoe Trilling being full frontal naked 50% of the film and a dude who rides a horse completely nude with his dong flapping everywhere keeps me watching till the end for no apparent reason. There is good reason this film has been buried and not talked about much as I give it 0 stars but give Mrs. Trilling a perfect 10!

 

Any comments or questions please send to: GrossMovieReview@verizon.net, GrossMovieReview@aol.com or www.facebook.com/grossmoviereviews . Remember folks always support your local independent movie theater, independent video store, and independent filmmakers! It will keep horror alive………

You can always visit and see some past reviews, independent film news, or me ranting at: www.grossmoviereviews.com !!!

Don’t forget you can also hear Kyle Poling and me talking about horror flicks on a weekly basis on the Bloodbaths and Boomsticks podcast at: www.bloodbathspodcast.blogspot.com/

Plus you can always go to the greatest T-shirt place online or if you are in Texas visit the store of “Fast Custom Shirts” where T-shirt Joe is the only place you should purchase your horror T-shirts: Go to www.fastcustomshirts.com for details.

We didn’t forget … just got drunk!

0
Posted on by

episode 183

This week we welcome back Mike Haushalter to the show.  And since he is our resident James Bond expert we will be talking about the new 007 joint SPECTRE. We also discuss 2015’s COOTIES and the Jeff Burr directed anthology FROM A WHISPER TO A SCREAM a.k.a. THE OFFSPRING.

 

http://www.bloodbathspodcast.blogspot.com/

 EPISODE 184

We’ve wanted to get this guy on the show… and he finally got the internet so here it is.  Our good Friend and convention buddy RICK OF THE DEAD joins us to talk about something all 3 of us have in common.  Working at a video store…..  The sight, the smells, the customers, the drugs, all of it gets covered in this episode.  So download it to learn the secret origin of piss video guy.

 

http://www.bloodbathspodcast.blogspot.com/