Tag Archives: YouTube

Infinite Santa 8000 web series review

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Infinite Santa 8000: Web Series (YouTube) – Before there was a full feature there was this holiday animated horror treat that was just mind blowing and thought it was time for a revisit for those of yinz that haven’t witnessed the awesomeness. The web series was conducted into 13 short episodes that ran a little over two minutes (a couple seconds less or more on a couple) paired with some bad ass thrashing music for the intro and outro. This story is set in a post-apocalyptic world a thousand years from now where all that is left is mutants and Robo people. Believed to be the only one left Santa lives a quiet life but he also must kill for food these days in order to survive these harsh future times. The mystical man is also a gun totting, machete wielding, flame throwing son of a bitch as mutants find ultimate death at his hands. But in a world with no hope a young girl named Martha comes into Santa’s life as they become quick friends. Unbeknownst to either Martha is a pawn used to get Santa out of hiding for an evil doctor to do experimentation on the fat jolly old fool for his magical powers of survival all these years. Santa and Martha escape the evil doctor’s clutches for now in search of a safe place in the wasteland but in this sadistic creature filled future there is nowhere to hide! The music is bad ass, the animation is wonderful, and after all these years the story still holds up as I always like to call this “Animated Santa in Mad Max world”. So this holiday season do yourself a favor and go watch this “FREE” web series on the YouTubes n’at to check out what some cool Indie folk did about 15 years ago as I give this project 4 out of 4 stars.

Gross Movie Reviews #669

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The Final Possession (Tubi) – One of the newest projects from Mark Polonia has Tim Hatch in the role of Father Thomas warning all of us that the devil is coming. The Father’s plan is to send out his disciples to stop the “evil one” and to have the agents of the darklord killed. (Which honestly folks that isn’t God like right or isn’t that against the church? Must be one of those Prophecy film things I am still trying to figure out 25 years later…) Anyhow, if Father Thomas does not accomplish this task it will allow the “Day of Judgement” to come! Bold undertaking for an independent film on a very limited budget as the film will be a fun watch for hardcore Polonia fans. My main complaint of this film is it did entertain me but felt like it was made 30 years too late in the career of Polonia Brothers Entertainment as I feel it would have been a totally different film then and how they would have tackled it? Either way another solid entry into the IMDb list for Polonia and crew as I give it 2 ½ out of 4 stars and yes I quite enjoyed Tim Hatch reading his lines from the book in a couple of scenes as I have done that on a regular basis (yes, I have become a fan of Tim Hatch)

He Never Left (Plex) – In 1997 at a small town of Larsen City has a masked killer “Pale Face” who haunted the town terribly killing many only to disappear without reason. Now present time, Gabe a recent parole has done something bad and trying to hide out at a seedy motel. Gabe trying to arrange an escape out of town now that authorities are searching everywhere for him has to stay hidden until he gets the call to bolt. Problem something happens in the next room and Gabe believes “Pale Face” is back? This is where the real story begins as Gabe is losing his mind and bodies are starting to pile up again. This is a creative independent serial killer film that will leave many thinking one way or another as there is no middle ground on this movie. Yes, you will know who the killer is but do you actually? The beauty of the film is how it sucks you in believing you are in for another hack and slash Indy but there is a lot more to this than meets the eye. Folks give this film a chance, pay attention, and I quite enjoyed what this film did as I give it 3 ½ out of 4 stars.

Popeye: The Slayer Man (Amazon) – So the second of three Popeye horror films out there and this one goes with more of what we know of the spinach eating cartoon character. In this version it is rumored a ghost haunts the abandoned spinach canning factory down at the dock and it kills anyone that enters and talks shit on the location. Twenty years later enter sleezeball real estate people, bootleg Joel D. Wynkoop as security, a small group of film students wanting to film on the last night before the building is sold, an abusive boyfriend and his crew and we got a POPEYE SLASHER FILM! WTF? Funny thing happens here folks… the movie works as it becomes a fun bloodbath with an entertaining subplot about radioactive spinach. Gimme stuff like this all the time as I give the cartoon adaption 3 stars.

The Final Alliance (YouTube) – So apparently Hollywood or sub-Hollywood was sucking ideas from my brain long ago as this beauty comes out of the golden era of direct-to-video B-movie junk of 1990 that stars David Hasselhoff as Will Colton who has come back home with… his pet puma! Yep, I got you wanting to watch it before you even finish reading this. Do I even need to write this review at this point? Colton and Felix roll back into town mysteriously on this old farm that bikers have made their ‘fuck pad’. Colton refuses to have any of this go on so he starts kicking ass soon as he enters his old house. But Colton and the pet puma do not stop there as they learn the biker gang and oh did I mention the biker gang is led by the legendary John Saxon with bleached out hair, weird contacts, and rides in a side car the whole film? Back to the story Colton and Felix roll into town meet the town hottie who owns the grocery store and begins to convince the small town it is time to get rid of this biker trash. As Joe Bob would say “have we seen this couple of dozen times? Yes we have. But have you seen it with a weird John Saxon and Hoff’s pet puma?” This amazing hot garbage feels like it was sucked out of my teenager ‘Knight Rider’ loving mind and I am quite happy to let yinz know you can watch it for free on the YouTubes n’at as I give the movie 3 stars.

Empire of the Dark (YouTube) – Holy shit what wormhole did I fall down as I watched this weird fantasy film that was made by Steve Barkett who also stars in it with the likes of Joe Pilato and Jay Richardson. Immediately when it begins it feels like some lost late 70s TV movie that played once and disappeared into the void. Then after credits the movie takes another odd turn as I feel like I just found a lost episode of Commander USA I use to watch as a kid? So here are the plot folks: a cop named Richard goes through a portal (with one bullet by the way) to save his super-hot girlfriend (which there is no way this dude is pulling her). But there is a twist kids he can only save the baby or super-hot ex-girlfriend now mom. He picks the kid and everything is history or until twenty years later strange shit pops up as Richard is a private detective who is working on the “demon slasher” case and dabbles in sword play. (Did Dan Komarek write this shit?) The Satanists are back murdering people, Richard’s hot ex is talking to him in his dreams, and the kid from twenty years ago now grown up wants answers damn it and the only way to defeat the Satanists is with bibles and swords as I give it 2 ½ stars!

Beezel (DVD) – So some weirdo bought a house with a fucked up looking witch living in the basement in 1966. He convinced some female to marry him and become a serial killer of sorts as they feed this witch random people in hopes that this evil presence produces a baby and give them power. Supposedly this witch was taken by humans and that is how she got here so of course she requires a sacrifice if you are going to keep her ass in the basement. A couple (which the girlfriend character is an unlikable bitch) move in the home as the dude is the son of said serial killers and wants to sell this home and get the fuck out of there. Well the girlfriend doesn’t let that happen as she seeks out the stories about the weird shit that has gone on over the years in this house. I know there is horror fans that will just eat this film up and good for you but this movie for me seem to be missing that important ingredient “heart”? I felt like the film wasn’t bad but just going through the paces of hope to start a series of films to keep telling the story of said witch as I can only give the film 2 stars.

Harvester of Eyes (Fawesome) – Polonia and crew with another recent release that concerns eyeballs, a fortune teller, no budget, but also felt like it had to be done in a couple days (felt like there was a time constraint?) This interesting tale features Jamie Morgan throughout and looks like she had absolute fun with it as Sinthia, is sent out by her sister from hell to collect eyeballs from humans. Why eyeballs? Well they are the gateway to souls of mortals which Sinthia’s sister craves. Sinthia leaves the comforts of hell to take over a fortune teller’s business to collect her victims or eyeballs in this case. Things are going great until an old inspector gets involved and figures out the real reason bodies are piling up around town. Jamie Morgan was awesome, Jeff Kirkendall was perfect as the inspector, it just felt like the project was a bit rushed but that could be me but definitely see Polonia fans enjoying another entry outside of the usual Polonia films we have seen in the past as I give it 3 out of 4 stars.

Mark Polonia: A Life of Monsters, Mayhem, and Movies (YouTube) – For those who are interested this is a quick two part documentary done in two five minute segments in 2015 on the career of Mark Polonia. Most likely a piece for local TV just celebrating what Mark has accomplished in his community. It is a fun look and interview with Mark as they even talk with others who worked with Mark over the years and tell quick stories about him. Another reason to check it out is to refresh people’s memories Mark is one of the godfathers of SOV and what their projects did for the video market in the late 80s and early 90s that many movie fans might not know or have forgotten about. Fun stuff so if you get a chance, its free, its quick as I give it 4 stars.

Any comments please send to grossmoviereview@verizon.net or www.facebook.com/grossmoviereviews .

Plus you can always go to the greatest T-shirt place online or if you are in Texas visit the store of “Fast Custom Shirts” where T-shirt Joe is the only place you should purchase your horror T-shirts: Go to www.fastcustomshirts.com and support!

Getting to know your Grossfest 2025 guest!

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Besides us coming back to the Comfort Inn as it’s officially the home of Grossfest. Same time every year but a third time is a charm to welcome this talented duo as a guest of Grossfest 2025 and believe fans of our little convention yinz will absolutely love them let us introduce yinz to The Mummy and the Monkey! Check out their work: https://www.youtube.com/@TheMummyAndTheMonkey

Its not just their work with B-movies, their love for horror classics, or their passion for Indy films… This wonderful duo is the link between the past horror hosts to what future horror hosts should inspire to be! Their passion is unmatched and absolutely enjoy what they do as I think they will enjoy the Grossfest 2025 atmosphere.

Grossfest August 1st & 2nd, 2025

Location:

Comfort Inn Conference Center

699 Rodi Road, Pittsburgh, PA, 15235

To book a hotel room for Grossfest 2025 you can use this link: https://www.choicehotels.com/reservations/groups/YB53X6

August 1st, Friday 4-10pm

August 2nd, Saturday 11-7pm

(Movies and/or panels will be announced closer to the show)

For show info: http://www.grossfest.com or go to our Grossfest Facebook group or event page.

Vendor tables are $100 each and come with two passes contact grossfest@gmail.com for vendor application and how to pay.

Gross Movie Reviews #660

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Supercock (Blu-ray) – An odd 70s film literally about “cockfighting”! What is actually really cool is watch the movie with the commentary done by Fred Olen Ray as he has never watched the film until he did this commentary as he has loads of fun stories to tell about all who were involved in this project. The plot is about an American cowboy taking his rooster to the Philippines for the first Olympic Cockfighting Championship. It is nowhere near a horror film as much as an adventure/comedy of sorts as once the prized rooster is there it gets kidnapped. Then there is a whole thing of misadventures of getting the bird to the fights in time to prove this cowboy knew exactly what he was doing. The movie was okay but the wonderful commentary performed by Fred Olen Ray help me learn a lot than about this project and about filmmaker Ross Hagen who was a part of this as I give it 2 ½ stars.

Winnie the Pooh: Blood and Honey 2 (On Demand) – Surprised there was a sequel to that poor excuse for a movie adaption a year or so ago but more of these adaptions are coming so be prepared. This film goes completely out of its way while also sticking with the story of Pooh and Christopher Robin to give a much better horror film that makes you wish the first film never existed. The sequel picks up some time after the first film where Christopher Robin is pretty much declared a murderer by most in the town of Ashtown. Things have settled some but there is still people hunting down the potential Pooh and gang for execution. But Pooh and friends have had enough running and decide it is time to take out their frustrations on Ashtown and leave a bloody trail through the town looking for Christopher. More goes on with all the characters that actually give this a much interesting and fun backstory, But I say no more as that would be unfair to horror fans who haven’t seen this monster flick as I give it 3 stars.

Dressing Up Halloween: The Story of Ben Cooper, Inc. (On Demand) – This is a documentary that most likely will hit all people not just horror movie fans over the age of 35 of a man who changed a holiday with his company’s costume designs. The original business was in Brooklyn, New York where people were proud to work there and happy to see their work every Halloween. The doc goes through all the characters, licensing of them, how these famous costumes were made, etc. along with interviews of people who worked in the Ben Cooper warehouse. It’s fun as they go through all the boxes, the art, and the famous costumes a lot of us wore as kids for Halloween as I give it 3 stars.

The Icing (DVD) – One of the first films from Derek Braasch in 2014 is a no budget crime thriller which I wasn’t expecting. But to give credit where it’s due as the filmmaker gives us a well-executed late 90s mob feel kind of film that may run a little too long but in the end a definite solid watch. It begins with an ex-cop, Fin Scott, being offered $100,000 for a hit on a local Senator. Senator Bellows is taken out, Finn soon finds out the very beautiful younger wife is the person that ordered it as things get very messy from there. The characters are believable, I enjoyed what was pulled off to make this project happen so kudos to all involved as I give it 2 ½ out of 4 stars.

Maxxxine (Max) – So the third film in the trilogy (X, Pearl), in which I am not a huge fan of Mia Goth to begin with but since it’s a horror film I was curious to see how Ti West was gonna end this saga? It is now 1985; Maxine is a popular porn star who would like to make it in the mainstream acting world. The background is set with “The Night Stalker” murders taking place at the same time as everything comes to a head of Maxine’s career. So when a friend or two is murdered, detectives and a sleazy private investigator begin to follow her for different reasons as Maxine’s past has caught up to her finally. I can understand why horror fans enjoyed this film a lot but in the end it was not for me as I just felt I didn’t need this story of Maxine? Maybe it is because I am hung up on ‘X’ should have been a stand-alone film… don’t know. The picture is another piece of solid 80s nostalgia and I cannot complain with that as I give it 2 ½ stars.

Night of Terror (YouTube) – Here is an 18 minute horror short from Jim Campbell that sets the tone immediately as his picture takes place “Friday the 13th in October”. This is the type of picture I like seeing once in a while as it is being told through music, sounds, and actions not dialogue holding on to that old school classic silent film vibe. The story follows a man home alone that evening that is haunted by something ghastly in his dreams and his reality. Thought the film was quite entertaining, loved how it was shot and just loved the atmosphere it was going for as I give Mr. Campbell’s short film 3 out of 4 stars.

The Emasculator (Blu-ray) – This newer SOV flick centers around a young woman named Cindy and her father who haven’t had the best relationship since the passing of Cindy’s mother. After another argument Cindy heads out on a date with a guy who has a whole other definition of a date as Cindy sadly learns the hard way. Cindy is raped and filmed to her father’s dismay in a hotel room and instead of listening to Cindy’s wishes of letting it go he takes upon himself for revenge with a tool used for castrating cattle. He doesn’t just want revenge but to mutilate these sick men. This SOV flick is a fun ride through sleaze, revenge, a love for a daughter, which the film has a sick twist that may leave you disliking all characters involved as it gave off Nailgun Massacre vibes to me. Just for that folks I got give this picture 3 ½ out of 4 stars.   

Any comments please send to grossmoviereview@verizon.net or www.facebook.com/grossmoviereviews .

Plus you can always go to the greatest T-shirt place online or if you are in Texas visit the store of “Fast Custom Shirts” where T-shirt Joe is the only place you should purchase your horror T-shirts: Go to www.fastcustomshirts.com and support!

Gross Movie Reviews #640

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Crocodile (Blu-ray) – For the first time this Taiwan/Korea production from 1978/1979/1981 aka Crocodile Fangs (watch the extras and read about it at www.synapsefilms.com you will totally understand) has been released in special edition Blu-ray form. Apparently there was several editions released even with a different director’s name in the credits but this the U.S. version restored. You can check out some alternate and deleted scenes in the extras after. Anyway, after a horrible storm and some atomic blasts this causes a crocodile to come hunting for humans! Two doctors and their families are on vacation and become victims to the ever growing mutation of a crocodile. These two doctors being very distraught resign their jobs and begin doing research on crocodiles and why would a giant one eat their families? While those two do that the giant crocodile feeds every three days on the next village downstream destroying all in its path. After getting the bad ass local fisherman involved the second half of the movie literally becomes almost a scene for scene of ‘Jaws’ exception for the leaping giant crocodile that had me laughing for a good five minutes. This flick is some wonderful international B-movie cheese but the real treat is the extras: besides the commentary from a writer and film historian along with the several different openings and endings that are alternate or deleted scenes that may have not been seen by U.S. audiences? My favorite extra has to be the interview with Won-se Lee! The real director as his interview is around 35 minutes and gets into him not actually knowing his name wasn’t in the credits (Sompote Sands by the way), or how hard it was doing a Thai/Korean production, or how much the film has fans outside of his country? This interview alone is entertaining, interesting and worth the price of the Blu-ray edition of the film as I give it 3 out of 4 stars and can be found at www.synapsefilms.com .

Living to Die (VHS/YouTube) – This is a fun B-grade blackmail detective flick starring none other than Wings Hauser as Nick the burned out former detective who is brought in by a high roller in Vegas to check out who is trying to blackmail him? Nick tracks down a sleazy dude in Arnold Vosloo named Jimmy that came up with a scam. Problem when Nick is visiting Jimmy, Jimmy is shot to death in front of Nick and now has a whole host of other questions? Every time Nick gets close to some solution the person he visits is getting killed including eventually himself. Justifiable fun crap to watch when you are indecisive about what to watch on a rainy day as I give it 2 ½ stars.

A Soul’s Window (DVD) – Jason Burke’s latest short film tackles the story of Grant Herman. A man who awakens to a few familiar people in front of him with a death wound to the temple of his head. Mr. Herman is forced to hear out these people how he has harmed them in some way all because he is a bad “business man”. Burke’s writing and set up is brilliant for this project as I have written something similar but have never brave enough to bring it to film so I gotta respect the awesome job he did bringing this to life as I give this short film 3 ½ out of 4 stars.

Just Before Dawn (DVD) – A 1981 fun slasher set in the mountains that follow a group of young people who are heading for some camping and checking out the land one of them own. Within minutes the city folk are stopped and warned by the forest ranger (George Kennedy) “the mountain doesn’t read”! Once settled the group explores the wonderful mountains, waterfalls, etc., including running into a backwoods family that isn’t too keen on them hanging out there. When they meet this family it’s about halfway through the movie and then the film takes a real gritty screwed up tone as the group is stalked by ruthless backwoods twins who stalk and kill them one by one. Will the group survive long enough to make it off the mountain or will the secret survive of why people have disappeared over the years in these woods? To this day the film is still entertaining as hell, well worth a rewatch, and has an ending you maybe have never seen or see coming as I give it 3 stars.

Rat Disaster (YouTube) – You had me at rats attacking people so I took a chance and checked out this killer rat flick from China filmed back in 2022 where rats carrying an unknown virus have made their way on a train. Once the train gets rolling the rats begin to wonder they are agitated and fall from the ceiling of a boxcar to start biting all humans. After several innocent people are sacrificed what’s left of the people on the train must decide if they can make it to a nearby town for a cure that just came into a hospital and make it back before nightfall. The rats hate sunlight. There is just a wonderful scene that reminds you of ‘Day of the Dead’ when they make it to the town and see the rats have killed everyone as they are stacked up in the streets, cool rat killing stuff! Best way to describe this is that it is a combo of  ‘Train to Busan’ and ‘World War Z’ with rats as I give this cheesy and dramatic entertainment 2 ½ stars.

Dreams of the Dead (DVD) – Many moons ago (1994) a young Brad Sykes made a SOV horror film in Virginia but never released it, now it is soon to be. This bold and interesting horror vision introduces us to a young man named Adrian who begins to get letters to his home for a past resident who suddenly disappeared? The letters are all addressed to an Edgar Kim and this fascinates Adrian to the point of distracting him away from finishing a movie script with his friend. As Adrian slowly dwells on the mystery of Edgar Kim he begins to have visions of a beautiful woman who he doesn’t know but does know she is connected to Edgar in some way. Adrian refuses to let this go as it sucks him in deeper. Also let’s note I quite enjoyed the scene with Adrian looking up Edgar in the yellow pages oh those were the days in 1994. Without giving up the brilliant ending Brad’s film comes off more like a psychological thriller than a straight up horror film? I don’t know if Mr. Sykes pulled off exactly what he wanted but this movie has kind of a ‘Sledgehammer’ vibe that I believe will have SOV fans screaming to preorder this immediately as I give this project Mr. Sykes should be proud of 3 ½ out of 4 stars.

Don’t go in the Woods (DVD) – It is 1981 and some people are going missing in the same part of a small town wilderness where a group of four people have just shown up to go camping. After about 30 minutes of everyone else being killed off by a crazed mountain man the group trips over the cabin this crazed individual is staying at. From there in this terrible form of ‘Just before Dawn’ the four are just trying to survive long enough to get off the mountain as I give the film 2 stars.

The Blue Hole (DVD) – Dave Castiglione returns to the director’s chair some 17 years after his last directed film even though he has kept himself busy with acting roles. Rounding out his cast with some familiar Indy vets Dave puts together a mystery horror film of sorts that begins in Pine Barrens, New Jersey aka The Pines aka Pinelands June 1997 where a masked man stalks two women at their pool and kills them. This leads into a reporter being sent to the area 24 years later to interview a former police chief of the area and connect truth to folklore hopefully? Bree is not exactly happy with this latest gig because she has been passed over for managing editor but once there she becomes fully engrossed with the chief and her cameraman as she tries to connect several events of missing persons that this former police chief still wrestles with into retirement! As they go through all the strange things over the years Bree soon finds herself in possible trouble with ‘the blue hole’ legend? The film feels like a lost episode of a long canceled sci-fi TV series of the early 90s which will quickly find and entertain an audience for sure as I give the film 3 out of 4 stars.

Any comments please send to grossmoviereview@verizon.net or www.facebook.com/grossmoviereviews .

Plus you can always go to the greatest T-shirt place online or if you are in Texas visit the store of “Fast Custom Shirts” where T-shirt Joe is the only place you should purchase your horror T-shirts: Go to www.fastcustomshirts.com and support!

Horrortales.666 Part 3

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This Saturday we are giving our fans what they been screaming for. A free screening of Horrortales.666 Part 3. The fun part you can see from the comfort of your couch and it’s free.

It will be a one time showing at 9 PM Eastern Time 5/20/2023.

It will be avail on YouTube.

Live chat at time of movie.

https://youtu.be/79DlrBZTco8

So apparently we do more podcasts when the apocalypse is happening?

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This week we give you 3 more reasons to sit your couch and listen to us yammer on about movies.   What else are you gonna do?  You are probably under quarantine anyway.  First we talk about the new release of Tammy and the T-Rex.  Then Tim talks about his buddy Henrique’s flick OUIJA ROOM.  And finally Kyle checks in with an action flick from the 90’s in JUDGMENT NIGHT.  So sit with us for over 2 hours of nonsense and remember during this time of wayward virus contamination please be a cool human to each other.  So download this episode for a free roll of toilet paper. (Offer void where prohibited)  

http://bloodbathspodcast.blogspot.com/

This virus outbreak is a really weird time we are living in.  And Kyle thought he would take a half hour and try to do something good.  So… He decided to curate a giant list of cult, horror, Sci-fi and generally weird flicks that are completely free to watch through apps available over your smart TV, roku, game console, fire stick, or a ton of other gadgets out there.  Just remember that we are all in this thing together and take advantage and maybe check out something that you’ve never seen before.

http://bloodbathspodcast.blogspot.com/

Gross Movie Reviews #448

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Gross Movie Reviews #448

 

The Babysitter (DVD) – This teen horror film that is a wolf in sheep’s clothing lures you in thinking the film is just another teen horror but blossoms into a hilarious gore fest. Cole is a nerdy teenager that still has a babysitter. But the babysitter is a very hot young lady named Bee that just seems to get Cole. Cole and she have a lot in common and Cole is starting to grow up and see Bee in a different light. Cole convinced by the girl across the street to stay up to see if Bee parties or make out with her boyfriend after Cole goes to sleep during babysitting nights. Cole does… And what Cole witnesses is nothing he was prepared for as Bee invites friends for a game of spin-the-bottle which turns into a blood-soaked sacrifice! Cole now must go all “Home Alone” in order to survive Bee and her friends now he knows the truth. The horror flick is a fun reminder yes it takes lots of blood and guts to entertain but also just a simple hilarious storyline could make the horror film worth the watch. I really enjoyed this fun horror flick as I give it 3 ½ stars.

 

The Demon Murder Case (YouTube) – A 1983 TV movie that claims to be based on the ‘Warrens’ but using different names and stars Kevin Bacon. Kevin’s character Kenny and his girlfriend go to check out a house and his girlfriend’s younger brother claims seeing a burned up 4 foot man at the house. As the days pass the younger brother changes, seems different. When things get out of control and the police get involved, priests are called in and even paranormal experts. The kid claims this demon called “The Beast” has taken him over? Kenny cares for the kid so much he challenges the demon and the demon takes the challenge on and possesses Kenny. A death is involved and most of the story is told from flashbacks as Kenny stands trial for murder a year after events. A cool lost TV horror flick that I believe has not been released on DVD and possibly ever on VHS as I cannot find it. But you can find it on YouTube as I give it 2 ½ stars.

 

This House Possessed (YouTube) – Again here is another rare TV movie find from my childhood. The film was released in 1981 on NBC starring Parker Stevenson, Lisa Eilbacher, and pay attention ‘Elm St.’ fans Amanda Wyss. Gary is a hard working singer who doesn’t take much down time collapses at a concert. He is rushed to the hospital and told he needs to take a break from the business as drugs or heavy drinking is ruled out. Sheila is a nurse that Gary hits it off with and trusts and hires her to take care of him while he goes on an extended vacation. They head out driving in the middle of nowhere and find a very cool house by itself. The house was a hi-tech house built before they were popular but hasn’t been really lived in since a fire several years ago. Once bought and settled in, Sheila and Gary start to become more of a couple the home seem to have a mind of its own and begins to spy on them. Strange things and eventually deaths happen surrounding the house. You get a water hose spraying down a young couple on the lawn, the house crushing a woman in her car with the front gates, and even boiling another woman in the pool. The TV movie feels so 70s but was released in 1981 and to my knowledge has not been released on any format. So as I give this film 3 stars take a gander at YouTube and search for this horror gem.

Bubba the Redneck Werewolf (DVD) – Bubba is a redneck through and through and doesn’t stand up for himself much as his high school girlfriend (Bobbi Jo) is now seeing someone else. Bubba depressed decides to make a deal with a demon to help this status and he is turned into a werewolf for his soul. While Bubba is learning of his new appearance, strength, actually having sex with Bobbi Jo, and hunger for chicken wings at the bar, the demon is going around the small town and finding gullible folks. The demon makes deals for their souls that go bad quickly. Now the small town looks to Bubba the Redneck Werewolf to do something about it? And Bubba does what any self-respecting person does and that is challenge the demon to a game of quarters! I absolutely loved this film and totally believe if the great horror film “Wolfcop” exists more horror fans would have found this 2014 flick and been talking about it. This is much lower budgeted film than “Wolfcop” but is very witty take on the werewolf concept and think horror and werewolf fans need to give this film a chance as I give it 4 stars.

 

The Burning Dead (DVD) – Okay somehow Danny Trejo is a Native American who tells a story of the ‘Donner Party’ in 1846 is part of some kind of volcanic zombies? Now in present day the volcano has erupted again it is bringing the zombies back with its exploding green rocks. Confused… Bored? Just pass on this one folks as this is why I exist to watch crap like this as I give it 1 star for just Danny Trejo showing up.

 

Last Ones Out (Shudder) – In 2015, an unknown virus hits rural parts of South Africa and it is beginning to spread. An American is there with his fiancée but has an appendix problem. While awaiting surgery in the hospital the virus hits and he wakes to find no one is left except a nurse. Now, the American, the nurse, a doctor and his brother make their way across the country side hopefully to find help? The American claims there is a convoy at a location that leaves in the morning as it can take them out of the quarantine zone. This isn’t a zombie flick as much as a rage virus flick aka “28 Days Later”. If you were a fan of the flick “The Dead” that was released a few years back this will be in your wheelhouse as I give it 2 ½ stars.

Sheborg Massacre (DVD) – An Australian film that is a big old mix of several genres about a cyborg alien that escapes its captors to crash land on earth near a puppy farm. This cyborg alien uses the puppy farm for food and begins its evil plan of turning people into machines. Meanwhile two hot young ladies are causing havoc around town and get together with a punk rock singer to go release the puppies from their prison. Unbeknownst to them once at the puppy farm they must fight these cyborgs in order to escape. Once back home they must make the decision to go to war with these cyborgs and the alien in order to not only survive, save their little town, but the world. This movie is a glorious bloody mess and the women that played the roles of Dylan and Eddie were absolutely fucking awesome! If you enjoy “Dead Alive”, “Evil Aliens”, “Bad Taste” this 3 ½ star horror film is right up your alley.

 

Fear Town, USA (DVD) – It is St. Blevins Day, the day of big celebrations. The day to celebrate St. Blevin who led all the polish children out of the village to the ocean and their death! So there is a big party that everyone is trying to get into. Four nerdy Dungeons and Dragons bros are going, some others are just camping out next to it, supposedly there is an escaped mental patient, and there is a ghost sorority girl. Mash this all together with dudes and women talking about getting their pussies crushed every thirty seconds and you have this hilarious slasher film. But the best part of the film might be the four nerdy bros who find the wrong party and become a part of a sacrifice that doesn’t work so the Satan worshippers decide to start a bowling league! Fun random stuff my friends and has been released by Troma so go support as I give the film 3 stars.

 

Silent Madness (DVD) – A lesser known 1984 slasher film also known as “Beautiful Screamers”, “The Omega Factor”, and “The Nightkillers”, is about a patient that is mistakenly released from the Cresthaven Hospital. The patient Howard Johns is a man with a murderous past and heads to a small woman’s college to continue his killing spree. A doctor from the hospital heads to the college to investigate this clerical error. She goes uncover for the local paper so she can find out more at the college but stumbles upon what may have sparked everything 17 years ago. Not the best of the slasher films but if you are a completest you will want this on your list as I give it 2 stars. At this time I believe there is only a Region 2 DVD of this title.

 

Summer of 84 (DVD) – It is Freeport, Oregon, June 1984 and a serial killer is loose in suburbia. Four friends get together and decide to stalk the neighborhood cop they believe is the serial killer. But they do not have evidence so they come up with a plan to get some. The friends keep come up with dead ends until finally they get the bright idea to break in his house and video tape their findings. Problem is they find way more than they wanted too and now the cop is on the run or so they think as he wants revenge. The film has that “Stand by Me” vibe so I was in from the beginning and enjoyed the kids trying to solve who the killer. But I believe the coolest thing of this movie was the feel of 1984. The shoes, the bikes, the background cars and houses, they got everything right to help set up this story. Yeah the movie isn’t exactly horror and runs a few minutes long but don’t let that stop you from seeing a very entertaining flick as I give it 3 stars.

 

Mom and Dad (DVD) – This bat shit crazy film stars Nic Cage and Selma Blair as normal parents just trying to make it through parenthood. But a strange unexplained virus is hitting parents worldwide where they have the urge to kill their own children. And parents are just doing plain boring murders they are trying to do some brutal ass damage. Once the virus hits Nic Cage and Selma Blair’s characters it is freaking hilarious as they chase their kids all over the house and try to gas them out of the basement. When you thought it could not get any better we get a great scene about life sucking with kids and people not understanding. But the ultimate topper is when the grandparents show up for the forgotten dinner and the grandpa is mother fucking the man, the myth, the legend Lance Henriksen and he starts stabbing the shit out of Nic Cage. Horror fans check the brains at the door and just enjoy this this amazing piece of film of complete chaos and how beautiful it is as I give it 4 stars.

 

Party Bus to Hell (DVD) – Bus full party goers are on their way to ‘The Burning Man Festival’. The bus driver stops in the middle of the desert night after running down a terrified Tara Reid and leaves the people to fend for themselves. She has left them for a group of Marauders/Satanists/Mad Max extras? Take your pick folks. Anyway this group of bloodlust freaks keep chanting “Release the Chosen One” as they attack the party goers and try to murder and eat them. The party goers figure out the virgin among them and force her to have sex with someone to stop the bloodlust freaks belief from coming true. This film has a good set up but just never seems to hit all the right notes and seems disjointed as I give it 1 ½ stars.

 

Seventh Moon (DVD) – Amy Smart and her man have gone to China for their honeymoon and to meet his parents. But according to Chinese myth the full moon on the seventh lunar month some weird shit goes down in the countryside where old myths die hard. Well the couples are lost in the countryside thanks to their driver who abandons them. Apparently we come to find out later in the film that this dude believes in the myth of the pale demons coming to murder and he needed a sacrifice and they were it. The couple must face of with the pale demons and survive the night. Sounds like a good concept but I have seen some better foreign horror films and this just had long boring lulls throughout that makes it tough to sit through. Want weird? Look for a film called “The Johnsons” as I give this film 1 star.

Any comments or questions please send to grossmoviereview@verizon.netor www.facebook.com/grossmoviereviews . Remember folks always support your local independent movie theater, independent video store, and independent filmmakers! It will keep horror alive………

Don’t forget you can also hear Kyle Poling and me talking about horror flicks on a weekly basis on the Bloodbaths and Boomsticks podcast at: www.bloodbathspodcast.blogspot.com/ also available at http://www.stitcher.com/podcast/kyle-poling-2/bloodbaths-and-boomsticks?refid=stpr

Plus you can always go to the greatest T-shirt place online or if you are in Texas visit the store of “Fast Custom Shirts” where T-shirt Joe is the only place you should purchase your horror T-shirts: Go to www.fastcustomshirts.com for details.

Grossfest 2 is coming… July 20, 2019, check our Facebook page and www.grossfest.com for details and for upcoming guests.

Gross Movie Reviews #361

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Gross Movie Reviews #361

 

By Tim Gross

 

Crimson Peak (Theater) – The best way to describe the film is the way Guillermo Del Toro described it as “gothic romance”. Here is the quick story; the dude that played Loki in “the Avengers” movies is inventor looking for money from big American companies to invest to help him finish it. Think of it as a Kickstarter campaign or Indie Go-Go. Well he gets denied by a big shot that just happens to have only one daughter and of course she isn’t married yet. Well Loki isn’t there so much for the money right now as he is looking for a new bride to take home to his sister to kill for the money… and incest. Things don’t go according to plan when the new bride keeps seeing ghosts in the broken down castle. Great atmosphere, great scenery, but blah overall on the ‘Hammer-lite’ flow.  It pretty much just exists and for that I just give it 1 ½ stars.

 

Night of the Wild (DVD/SyFy Channel) – Eric Red made a movie with Asylum Entertainment about meteors falling and causing all dogs to attack humans. Well most of the attacks looks like the dogs are wrestling or playing with the actors when they are not CG’d in. This movie tries hard not to be a pile of steaming poo but damn if you can’t get that scent out of your nose while watching it. Asylum stick with the ‘Shark Attack, Sharknados, and Shark whatever’ films as I give this flick 1 star.

 

Moonstalker (DVD-R/DVD) – The director of the 80s film “Hellgate” also did this flick too before disappearing from filmmaking land. It’s the middle of winter and a family is vacationing all by themselves in the middle of the woods. Until, an old dude rolls up sits down for some talk and cake and then unleashes his son! Who just happens to be a pillow sheet, straight-jacket wearing weirdo that goes and kills the family for their microwave? But that wasn’t enough for Bernie as he disguises himself as one of the incoming people to the ‘Wilderness Councilor Camp’. Then Bernie continues his slashing ways through the others. Movie was heavily influenced by “Friday the 13th”.  I give it 2 stars.

 

Goosebumps (Theater) – Now let me explain something here, “Goosebumps” the books and original TV series missed me by a few years. By time this book series became known and popular I was 17 or 18 years old and about to graduate. But several younger friends I had would always talk about this series for years to come. It was great PG-rated horror stuff for teenagers. So over the years the series has gone and came back and even had a new series come back for a couple years not too long ago but the movie should have happened 10 or 15 years ago. And that folks is the only bad thing I could say about the film. Now present day, Jack Black is R. L. Stine who has a daughter/Hannah/maybe and moves around a lot for unknown reasons. Cue in new boy movies in next door, Madison, Delaware, daughter takes an interest. Mr. Stine says, “Stay away!” New boy tries to be good about it until one evening he calls the police because Stine is screaming at Hannah. Worried and the police are about to file a false report warning against the young man he sneaks back in to check on Hannah with a friend a couple days later. When in they both find a room that has all the “Goosebumps” manuscripts written. Accidentally, one gets knocked down, opens and Sasquatch is loose! Hannah and the boys follow it and try to capture it but fail but get help from R.L. Stine. Mr. Stine explains this is the reason they keep moving because eventually someone opens one of the manuscripts and chaos ensues. But it’s too late as Slappy the Dummy is loose and plans on making sure none of them get sucked back into the books. This movie is absolutely wonderful and perfect. Again if it was made 10 or 15 years ago it’s “The Monster Squad” of that generation. I give the film 3 ½ stars and Jack Black was awesome as R.L. Stine. Critics get over yourselves this movie was good.

 

The Green Inferno (Theater) – College students join a major protestor that has arranged for them to fly into Peru and go chain themselves to construction vehicles that are about to destroy a jungle and an ancient tribe. The protestors want to protect them and film it for the world to see to help stop it. After the event they get back on a plane to go back to their hotel only for it to go down in the middle of the jungle and be capture by the ancient cannibal tribe in the aftermath. Once captured those who didn’t die almost want to as they witness some horrible imagery as they watch their friends be baked, sliced, and diced for meals. Never mind the head of the protest is a complete dickhead but adds to the horrific storyline. Congrats Eli Roth, you made your cannibal film. It was good. I enjoyed the tribes’ people and the storyline. It was a good, bloody, cannibalistic time and that is all I look for in this type of film. I am sure fans will call it Eli Roth’s “Cannibal Holocaust”, which it’s not but it is a must watch for cannibal fans. I give the fun flick 3 stars.

 

Knock Knock (On Demand) – So Eli Roth has been a busy man since he released this film also at the same time as “The Green Inferno”. Love the choice of Keanu Reeves as the lead but that is about all I enjoyed about the film. This film is about you are supposed to know males are pigs and do not trust another fucking soul on this earth especially if they have hacked your social media. Mr. Roth lets go make a sequel to “The Green Inferno” as I give this 1 star.

 

They Found Hell (SyFy Channel) – Scientists in training have figured out the doorway to hell by accident. They were trying to do the Jeff Goldblum thing with transferring an object from one place to another and thought they did it until it opened a hole in the ground that sucked them into hell. It’s a cool concept that may not have been executed correctly. But anyhow the students/scientists in training try to make their way through hell in hopes of finding the disc that can get them back through the portal. Monsters, zombies, and creatures of sorts constantly try to kill them, because it is hell… I could be wrong on this but I thought this could have made a great B-movie for SyFy Channel fans if they used it for another “Dungeons and Dragons” sequel or even a “In the Name of the King” sequel with Dolph Lundgren. I give it 2 stars.

Sequence

Sequence of Demise (YouTube) – A 27 minute film from director Jim Mitchell a few years back. The film lives up to its title as a quiet ride between three friends and a baby to the cemetery goes wrong quickly after two unknown men decide it’s time for  rape, torture, and murder. The independent short film from Mr. Mitchell comes off as an experimental film or first rough cut of what Jim Mitchell wanted on film. With that said it fits in with such films as “August Underground” or “Double Dose of Terror”. Usually not my cup of tea but if it is truly experimental and Mr. Mitchell seeing what he can do film wise it has me interested how he has progressed since 2008. It’s available on You Tube and worth checking out as I give 2 out of 4 stars.

 

Any comments or questions please send to: GrossMovieReview@verizon.net, GrossMovieReview@aol.com or www.facebook.com/grossmoviereviews . Remember folks always support your local independent movie theater, independent video store, and independent filmmakers! It will keep horror alive………

You can always visit and see some past reviews, independent film news, or me ranting at: www.grossmoviereviews.com !!!

Don’t forget you can also hear Kyle Poling and me talking about horror flicks on a weekly basis on the Bloodbaths and Boomsticks podcast at: www.bloodbathspodcast.blogspot.com/

Plus you can always go to the greatest T-shirt place online or if you are in Texas visit the store of “Fast Custom Shirts” where T-shirt Joe is the only place you should purchase your horror T-shirts: Go to www.fastcustomshirts.com for details.