Gross Movie Reviews #630

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It’s a Wonderful Slice (DVD/Vimeo) – So I was privileged enough to check out a not released yet holiday Indy flick from an unknown filmmaker to me, Michael Moutsatsos (hope I spelled that right?). Anyway, Michael goes an unconventional route of holiday anthology story telling that gives the viewer a history lesson of Santa, Krampus, and a mischievous elf on their killing ground that eventually leads into the introduction of the storyteller. When the storyteller appears this is where the real movie begins as he ties together five quick holiday horrors that a man being sliced in his shower, a friend using wolves as cover for a murder, Santa attacking a couple in the woods, Satan controlling a man, and finally a beautiful woman toying with her victim. The story telling isn’t breaking new ground (but unconventional) as I quite enjoyed how the filmmaker went about putting everything together in this no budget production using a small if not same cast in each segment and using maybe three sets or areas the whole film. Otherwise, knowing what you have (not much) using it to your advantage and a high budget glossy look along the way. How to put it: when I see something like this I already know this might not be the filmmaker’s best work to date but it shows me they are usually testing or experimenting of putting together something even more entertaining in their next project or the one after that? Again anthologies can be a tough sell since a lot of filmmakers make them these days but these stories are quick, don’t linger, and you got someone dressed as Santa slaughtering people and quite simply you are going to have Indy movie viewers smiling in the end as I give this 2 out of 4 stars.

Cybernator (YouTube/VHS) – It’s the future of course in this direct-to-video early 90s B-flick where two cops are looking into cyborgs assassinating high ranking officials. Then bootleg Vernon Wells who is actually William Smith shows up for a paycheck as bootleg Steven Seagal! (Did you understand that gibberish?) Anyhow after one of the cops is killed in action the other finds out he has been bootleg Robocop for the past few years and now has a new mission to seek and destroy William Smith’s cyborg character. Pretty much a very terrible flick pitting good cyborg vs. bad cyborg as I can only give this film 1 star.

In Search of the Last Action Heroes (Tubi) – An absolute gem of a documentary that talks all about action films and how they got started to how they have fizzled out these days. Everything from James Bond to Bruce Lee to George Miller to how filmmakers were inspired by 50s and 60s westerns to make the modern action film! This has a bit of everything to interest even the occasional viewer of action movies as I give it 4 stars.

Calamity of Snakes (DVD) – Holy balls is this movie just fuckin wild! A crapload of snakes are uncovered at a construction site that is in a rush to get their apartment building built. The man financing the project says “Fuck it” and begins commanding the death of the snakes so they may continue the project. But all are warned these snakes will seek revenge! Once the building is up and operational tenants are reporting snakes are attacking which causes the manager to bring in the “Master of Snakes” who comes and chops them all into several pieces. Problem is believed to be solved again until the snakes come back in truck loads this time to attack a cocktail party and that is when the big king snake is revealed! This is not a film for those who are against animal cruelty or the squeamish as this movie gets bat shit crazy with the attacking snakes as I give it 3 stars. P.S. I didn’t know there was a whole snake burning army on call?

One More Shot (On Demand) – If you are Scott Adkins fans you are going to enjoy this flick as it tries the one continuous shot like Bruce Campbell in “Running Time”? Now I know they probably made a cut or two but they try the whole movie running time to be a continuous shot which is fun. Also a part of this project is Michael Jai White and Tom Berenger. Scott Adkins is CIA agent Harris who was part of an op in Poland trying to protect an asset. It all went bad as the movie starts soon as the plane lands at an empty airport near Norfolk and we are introduce to the Harris character. From there his asset is still in demand as there is a dirty bomb somewhere in the city set to go off in two hours and a military grade security team is there to kill off whoever has the asset to use him to take over everything in the U.S. This has a wonderful twist to an old action film formula that is well worth paying attention to more than just Scott Adkins amazing onscreen presence. Can’t wait to see what else this dude does as I give this flick 3 ½ stars.

Wanted Man (On Demand) – Dolph Lundgren is Johansen an old high strung bigot detective who has been under fire at the Del Vista Police Department recently for his actions towards a suspect. The “Defund the Police” crowd wants him gone but instead he is given a job to disappear into Mexico to go protect two escorts who witnessed DEA agents getting killed. While on the way back to the border Johansen is shot along with one of the witnesses as it’s all made to look like one of the cartels is doing it but isn’t? As Johansen is trying to make his way back he keeps getting stopped every time. A quick and pretty cool Dolph flick that also features Kelsey Grammer, Michael Pare, and a great character actor in Roger Cross as I give this action flick 3 stars.

Crabs! (DVD) – This is one of those movies that hit in early 2022 that would have been perfect for SyFy Channel if that was still a thing but also most likely this project got swept under the rug because of COVID? This cheeseball flick doesn’t try to pretend to be something it isn’t as it starts quickly with a power plant blowing up and then large crabs begin to attack people on the beach. When Phil and Maddy are not planning their prom they must come up with a plan to fight off the ocean demons who want to turn the prom into their own seafood slaughter fest! The movie has a little filler but knows how to hit all the high notes with this hilarious B-horror throwback that needs to be found sooner than later by all you horror fans as I give it 3 stars.

Beach Zombies (YouTube) – A recent no budget Indy flick that comes in at 38 minutes about bootleg versions of Beavis and Butthead who got older and held a long conversation about zombies in a car ride. They meet up with two shady dudes for a job that will pay big time if they dispose of a barrel at the closed beach? Instead when they go for the barrel a fog machine in the garage turns the bootleg duo into zombies that has them wandering around doing nothing. The beginning of the film doesn’t lie as it warns of what happens to idoits turning into zombies as it did make me laugh so I gotta give it 2 stars.

Zombie Beach (DVD) – A bad low budget Canadian zombie flick from 2010 that has college kids who go to the “Zombie Beach” to take pictures and get eaten. Apparently the beach is part of a centuries old agreement that where evil can walk or something? It is part of a prophecy that a chosen one will fight the zombies supposedly if you last through this entire terrible concept of a film that I have to give 0 stars.

Any comments please send to grossmoviereview@verizon.net or www.facebook.com/grossmoviereviews .

Plus you can always go to the greatest T-shirt place online or if you are in Texas visit the store of “Fast Custom Shirts” where T-shirt Joe is the only place you should purchase your horror T-shirts: Go to www.fastcustomshirts.com and support!

It’s a Wonderful Slice review

0

It’s a Wonderful Slice (DVD/Vimeo) – So I was privileged enough to check out a not released yet holiday Indy flick from an unknown filmmaker to me, Michael Moutsatsos (hope I spelled that right?). Anyway, Michael goes an unconventional route of holiday anthology story telling that gives the viewer a history lesson of Santa, Krampus, and a mischievous elf on their killing ground that eventually leads into the introduction of the storyteller. When the storyteller appears this is where the real movie begins as he ties together five quick holiday horrors that a man being sliced in his shower, a friend using wolves as cover for a murder, Santa attacking a couple in the woods, Satan controlling a man, and finally a beautiful woman toying with her victim. The story telling isn’t breaking new ground (but unconventional) as I quite enjoyed how the filmmaker went about putting everything together in this no budget production using a small if not same cast in each segment and using maybe three sets or areas the whole film. Otherwise, knowing what you have (not much) using it to your advantage and a high budget glossy look along the way. How to put it: when I see something like this I already know this might not be the filmmaker’s best work to date but it shows me they are usually testing or experimenting of putting together something even more entertaining in their next project or the one after that? Again anthologies can be a tough sell since a lot of filmmakers make them these days but these stories are quick, don’t linger, and you got someone dressed as Santa slaughtering people and quite simply you are going to have Indy movie viewers smiling in the end as I give this 2 out of 4 stars.

Make your hotel reservation sooner than later for Grossfest!

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Grossfest 2024

Friday and Saturday August 2 and 3rd, 2024

Comfort Inn Conference Center

699 Rodi Road, Pittsburgh, PA, 15235

Need to reserve a room: Hotel link to reserve a room for Grossfest 2024! https://www.choicehotels.com/reservations/groups/ET81E2

Tickets: $10 at the door for one day, $15 for both days for those who will be attending

Vendor room hours:

Friday 4-10pm

Saturday 11-7pm

Hotel rates go up after the first week of July and remember the hotel sold out last year! Remember if you have any trouble getting the Grossfest rate contact us so we can help.

Another Grossfest 2024 special guest announcement

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For those who may have not heard we have another special guest coming to Grossfest making their first Pittsburgh convention appearance! This person is a writer, director, and actor whose career has spanned at least four decades now. This talented person has been known to act in such Indy films: Psycho Vampire, Hung Jury, Psycho Sisters, and Easter Bunny Bloodbath 2: No More Tears, but also directed films like: An Ex-Hooker’s Christmas Carol, Deep Undead, and The Blue Hole which they are putting the finishing touches on as we speak. But this person might be known to Indy fans most for being the founder of Sharkey Video and his talented underwater camera work of the feature Deep Undead that just got a wonderful rerelease recently we are delighted to introduce all of yinz to Dave Castiglione!

http://www.grossfest.com

Grossfest 2024

Friday and Saturday August 2 and 3rd, 2024

Comfort Inn Conference Center

699 Rodi Road, Pittsburgh, PA, 15235

Need to reserve a room: Hotel link to reserve a room for Grossfest 2024! https://www.choicehotels.com/reservations/groups/ET81E2

Tickets: $10 at the door for one day, $15 for both days for those who will be attending

Vendor room hours:

Friday 4-10pm

Saturday 11-7pm

Grossfest 2024 guests

Sean Donohue

Sushii Xhyvette Holder

Jessa Flux

Kelsey Livengood

Matt Cannon… also appearing with Matt is Victor Butler who was the detective in Hexercise. 

Jorge Delarosa

Nathan Rumler

Rebecca Rinehart

Special guests

Dave Castiglione

Steve Rudzinski

Also let’s not forget ultra-talented, super horror movie fan, tattoo artist Angel O’Connor who will be doing tattoos at Grossfest both days!

Gross Movie Reviews #628

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Blood Feast (4K/remake) – I had no expectations going into this film because just like a lot of horror movie fans I felt this had been done already… ‘Blood Diner’ anyone?! Hell even ‘Blood Feast 2’ made a decade or two ago? But of course that didn’t stop anyone as an American family the Ramses headed to Paris six months ago to start up an American restaurant/diner thing. Owner Fuad Ramses and his diner are having tough times so he has been working a second job as night security dude at a museum. One morning Fuad has lost his pills which are critical to his health (according to Caroline Williams, the wife) and that night he witnesses Ishtar. Ishtar fascinates Fuad so much he goes to the library to do research on the goddess. Thus his research makes Fuad believe he has found the answer to his failings in Paris and it all starts with preparation for a giant feast that upcoming Saturday night with his family. Not only is he feeding on those he is killing but his family will also feast all in the name of Ishtar! There is no doubt the film went out of its way to be gory as hell. The cast and structure was great as Robert Rusler stole the flick with his performance that felt like he should have been in the 1963 original film as Fuad. Also it was great seeing an appearance of H.G. Lewis doing a YouTube thing giving backstory to Ishtar, a very tasteful gesture of a cameo. But my original stance on the film is still 2 out of 4 stars. Let me explain: If there was no original H.G. Lewis I think myself and other horror fans would have celebrated this release as soon as it was announced because this remake is solid and wonderful. But the biggest problem for any filmmaker is you are tackling something “historical” not only in minds of horror movie fans but just fans of “cinema”. So at least for me as I watch this version (as good as Robert Rusler was) I cannot get that original out of my mind let alone the over the top greatness called “Blood Diner” from the 80s. Hell, there is still a large portion of horror fans still learning of the legend of H.G. Lewis? This film I believe falls under the category “of it will be appreciated by horror fans in a decade or so after its release…” Also with this 4K version is the uncut version of the film, a ‘making of’ featurette, music video, red carpet premiere in 2018, promo teaser, and Scare cam. The full package itself I give 3 out of 4 stars and can be found through www.synapsefilms.com .

Desert Shadows (Tubi) – This little weirdo creature feature has Mitch Pileggi as Donnie who has lost his brother out in the desert when hunting one afternoon. Donnie has this crazy story about a monster or Baru in this case has taken him. With no one believing him he finds a Professor Ridley at a university who does believe and knows of a possible experiment that had rumored escapee at an old shutdown government facility near the disappearance. With the help of the professor’s assistant Morgan, Donnie and her go back and look for clues in hopes of finding Donnie’s brother? Instead they find some aftermath of victims of the creature which it might be a parasite that cocoons its victims to change them, mold them. Come on people, weird creature, government facility, and the bad ass dude that played Skinner on X-files! Gimme this shit all day as I give this fun creature flick 2 ½ stars.

Hair Metal Shotgun Zombie Massacre (You Tube) – After a few years of trying to track this one down for my list (yes for those that pay attention I have a massacre list just like an Amityville list and we are now under eight movies to find on my massacre list out of like 220) I watched this on You Tube on some kind of channel that is a virtual theater??? Anyway, this film takes place somewhere in Texas after 1989 it claims where four desperate metal heads and their drummer screw up with an evil book. The band is struggling to make it and to record an album but finally get their chance at a studio that was placed inside a cottage in the middle of a cemetery that was used to bury rapists and murders. Yes indeed, that is Metal! Of course after getting the booze and drugs going they find the evil book in the basement of this studio and decide to use it for their music. Thus of course brings forth the dead in this rather gory little Indy film that has zombies crashing the recording session. Surrounded by the undead and even with their flame throwing guitar there is nothing to do but pray to Satan for help who is played by none other Tom Araya, who shows up to make the film worth the watch just for this moment! The 83 minute Indy film has its moments and is a definite must watch if you were a metal person in the 80s and early 90s as kudos to the filmmakers for keeping that vibe throughout the feature. The only thing I could of maybe added to this is if they would have gotten W.A.S.P. front man Blackie Lawless to show up with Tom Araya or one be god and the other to be Satan now that would have been wonderful? But fun times with this metal zombie chaos as yeah it could have been edited to probably 70 minutes but it has some great gore, good music, and fucking Tom Araya from Slayer as I give this 2 ½ out of 4 stars.

Pot Zombies (DVD/You Tube) – An Indy film from the early 2000s I remember being advertised at some of the horror conventions I use to go to at that time. This quick flick directed by Justin Powers has some locals secretly placing radioactive material into the weed seedlings. So now whoever smokes the weed turns green and has the munchies for human flesh! There really isn’t an ending to this movie but there is a sequel I plan on checking out soon and if you look up this film you will come across my favorite person of all time T-shirt Joe Garcia of www.fastcustomshirts.com making shirts and talking about the film as I give this no budget flick 2 out of 4 stars.

Nightmare Alley (DVD/remake) – A recent remake of a film that was unknown to me as I mostly check out horror flicks and such but anytime the name Guillermo Del Toro is attached to it you got my attention. This is a period piece that starts I believe some time after the first World War about a man Bradley Cooper playing a drifter who hooks up with a carnival one evening. As he stays and learns the ins and outs of the carnival lifestyle he meets a young woman named Molly that he cannot keep his eyes off of. After a while he convinces her to leave with him and two years later they have a mentalist duo act that caters to the rich. Bradley Cooper or Stan is warned of using these powers too much or for not so good things as they will lead to trouble? But as he starts to believe his own bullshit seeing the money getting bigger and bigger his life begins to crumble around him. This is a great telling of the Freakshow business in the first half of the 1900s. Again this isn’t a horror movie as much as an interesting drama as I give it 3 stars.

Willard (DVD) – Food of the Gods, SyFy Channel, etc., owe a lot to this classic that doesn’t get talked about much these days that also not only had a sequel of sorts but a remake with Crispin Glover that was dark and wonderful. It is always fun to go back and revisit something like this 1971 classic about a young man Willard, who is stuck in a terrible job where he is overworked and overwhelmed by his controlling mother. But things are about to change for Willard as he makes friends with a rat outside of his mother’s home and the friendship blossoms that helps Willard come out of his shyness. But just when things are beginning to look great for Willard, his mother dies, he is about to lose his house, and that ignorant boss of his has just fired him causing friction between Willard and his new rat friends. Fun horror stuff that is kind of light hearted by today’s standards but was definitely the template for future “animal attacks horror films” and “rat horror films”. Just as equally good is the remake with Crispin Glover which I believe is a more sinister and darker version of this film also worth checking out as I give this 3 stars.

Hold that Ghost (DVD) – A 1941 film that has Abbott and Costello in their second film ever as the comedy act play relief waiters who get fired the first night on. They then become gas station attendants to make ends meet. Trying to explain jobs that don’t exist any longer for those who don’t even know this was a job long ago? Anyway these two somehow get mixed up with a mob man Moose Manson and are with him when he dies so they get to inherit supposedly a haunted hotel. From there as someone is murdered and two guys claiming to be detectives but disappear as the hilarity ensues. This is just a fun reset for horror fans that are looking for that movie to help cleanse the palate before doing another deep dive in cinema as I give this 3 stars.

Blood Gorge (You Tube) – I received a screener of a 40 minute independent horror film from a new name to the scene Victor Gabriel who wrote and directed this slasher film that takes place around Halloween. Victor gets right to the point in this straight forward Indy slasher where a masked man is slaughtering his way through a group of young people with some fun unique kills. The cast is likable, Victor was sure to keep this tight so the story doesn’t grow dull (it’s hard to bring something new if anything to the slasher genre), love the Faces of Death jacket to engrain that 80s horror feel, but the surprise good thing of this first effort out is the effects as they are just delightful to see! Victor and company are not reinventing the wheel here but this has that “let’s see if we can accomplish this first before we do what we really want to do next” kind of film feel. An experimental project if you like to say as I believe they have succeeded with flying colors! Great stuff from a new name to me in the Indy world and look forward to seeing what is next as I give this project 3 out of 4 stars.

Saltville (DVD/You Tube) – From the mind that gave us Indy lovers “Music Store Massacre” comes an independent drama about racism still existing in a small mountain town of Virginia and the past coming back to haunt those who are corrupt. You know me this isn’t my usual cup of independent film tea but always enjoy getting to see stuff from a filmmaker that is completely off the beaten path. A brother returns home after twenty some years after a disappearance of their sister in the mountains that still haunts them. They disagree on just about everything including the new ski resort that is going to be built on the mountain but requires removing or forcing people who have lived up there out of their forest homes for hundreds of years. Sleazy lawyer, sinister plans to remove people, inbred blue people, racism, a missing sister, and using the Civil War as a back drop for this drama makes for an interesting project as I got give this film 2 ½ out of 4 stars.

Any comments please send to grossmoviereview@verizon.net or www.facebook.com/grossmoviereviews .

Plus you can always go to the greatest T-shirt place online or if you are in Texas visit the store of “Fast Custom Shirts” where T-shirt Joe is the only place you should purchase your horror T-shirts: Go to www.fastcustomshirts.com and support!

Side Effects May Vary… In Pittsburgh!

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 Side Effects May VaryThe Pittsburgh Cultural Trust and Tempe Digital

Harris Theater

Tickets:

trustarts.org/production/93355

“Side Effects May Vary” will inject Pittsburgh, PA with a one-night only special event screening at the historic Harris Theater on Saturday, January 27th at 7:30PM!

Special appearance by star Floyd Ewing Jr. (“Skinned Alive”), who will join director J.R. Bookwalter (“The Dead Next Door,” “Ozone”) and writer/star James L. Edwards (“Her Name Was Christa,” “Bloodletting”) for a post-show Q&A hosted by Art Ettinger, editor of Ultra Violent magazine.

With the world gripped by a deadly pandemic, science denier Glenn Rollins turns to an experimental vaccine as treatment for a lingering sickness. Much to the surprise of his doctor, wife, and friends, the remedy immediately fixes what ails him. But Glenn will soon discover the only thing more fatal than the virus… is the cure.

Attendees receive a free collectible promotional giveaway surgical mask featuring full-color artwork from the movie’s poster.
Presented with state-of-the-art digital projection and 5.1 surround sound in a landmark venue opened in 1931!

This unrated movie contains good stuff like nudity, language, sex, and graphic violence equivalent to a hard MPAA “R” rating! 17+ only, please. 

Event link: https://fb.me/e/5C7PN0XXC

Ticket link: https://trustarts.org/production/93355?fbclid=IwAR3gaLzQpDcj-7Xy6YSULdg0OVbdHjljX5N2v6N9r_wTocsLGdp10xarPDo

Another guest announcement for Grossfest 2024!

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For our next guest announcement is a person who has accomplished a lot in a short span of time: model, make-up artist, director, producer, writer, and influencer. This person has worn many hats and seems to be someone that the Grossfest crowd will just be delighted to meet! This person’s credits include acting credits in: Clown Motel 2, Sorority babes, Attack of the Corn Zombies, along with several more to be released within the next year. Yinz please give a warm welcome to this wonderful and beautiful newcomer who has already made an impact in the independent filmmaking world, Kelsey Livengood.

Grossfest 2024

Friday and Saturday August 2 and 3rd, 2024

Comfort Inn Conference Center

699 Rodi Road, Pittsburgh, PA, 15235

Need to reserve a room: Hotel link to reserve a room for Grossfest 2024! https://www.choicehotels.com/reservations/groups/ET81E2

Tickets: $10 at the door for one day, $15 for both days for those who will be attending

Vendor room hours:

Friday 4-10pm

Saturday 11-7pm

Vendor tables Price is $80 for the two-day show.

Vendor Set Up: Friday August 2nd 12:00 pm – 4:00 PM

Vendor Hours: Friday 4:00 PM to 10:00 PM Saturday 11:00 AM to 7:00 PM

Same place, same set up, two days long this time! (Remember let’s keep this simple and fun)

We accept Cash, checks or PayPal, Zelle or Venmo – Please make checks are payable to Tom Gross

Please send the completed and signed form along with your payment (if paying by check, address will be emailed or texted to you if needed).

If paying by anything other than check, just screenshot your completed app and email it back.

If you have any questions please email us at grossfest@gmail.com

Grossfest 2024 guests

Sean Donohue

Sushii Xhyvette Holder

Jessa Flux

Matt Cannon… also appearing with Matt is Victor Butler who was the detective in Hexercise.

Jorge Delarosa

Nathan Rumler

Rebecca Rinehart

Kelsey Livengood

Steve Rudzinski

Also let’s not forget ultra-talented, super horror movie fan, tattoo artist Angel O’Connor who will be doing tattoos at Grossfest both days!

Blood Feast 4K remake review

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Blood Feast (4K/remake) – I had no expectations going into this film because just like a lot of horror movie fans I felt this had been done already… ‘Blood Diner’ anyone?! Hell even ‘Blood Feast 2’ made a decade or two ago? But of course that didn’t stop anyone as an American family the Ramses headed to Paris six months ago to start up an American restaurant/diner thing. Owner Fuad Ramses and his diner are having tough times so he has been working a second job as night security dude at a museum. One morning Fuad has lost his pills which are critical to his health (according to Caroline Williams, the wife) and that night he witnesses Ishtar. Ishtar fascinates Fuad so much he goes to the library to do research on the goddess. Thus his research makes Fuad believe he has found the answer to his failings in Paris and it all starts with preparation for a giant feast that upcoming Saturday night with his family. Not only is he feeding on those he is killing but his family will also feast all in the name of Ishtar! There is no doubt the film went out of its way to be gory as hell. The cast and structure was great as Robert Rusler stole the flick with his performance that felt like he should have been in the 1963 original film as Fuad. Also it was great seeing an appearance of H.G. Lewis doing a YouTube thing giving backstory to Ishtar, a very tasteful gesture of a cameo. But my original stance on the film is still 2 out of 4 stars. Let me explain: If there was no original H.G. Lewis I think myself and other horror fans would have celebrated this release as soon as it was announced because this remake is solid and wonderful. But the biggest problem for any filmmaker is you are tackling something “historical” not only in minds of horror movie fans but just fans of “cinema”. So at least for me as I watch this version (as good as Robert Rusler was) I cannot get that original out of my mind let alone the over the top greatness called “Blood Diner” from the 80s. Hell, there is still a large portion of horror fans still learning of the legend of H.G. Lewis? This film I believe falls under the category “of it will be appreciated by horror fans in a decade or so after its release…” Also with this 4K version is the uncut version of the film, a ‘making of’ featurette, music video, red carpet premiere in 2018, promo teaser, and Scare cam. The full package itself I give 3 out of 4 stars and can be found through www.synapsefilms.com .

Gross Movie Reviews “Best of 2023” list

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Before we start I always explain I wish I could watch every new flick out there but that is just not in the cards for me. Now I will still get one or two comments of movies I left off or didn’t get to see this year? Hey, it happens but I bet you I have seen dozens or few on my list that you may have not knew existed so remember like all movie lists take this with a grain of salt people.

1) Then My Mind Walked Away (DVD) – One of my favorite Indy filmmakers of all time Jim Roberts has a new project coming to haunt fans as he introduces us to Logan Hill. Filming during COVID, Jim took full advantage of not much crew, not much cast, and the world changing. In the first couple tense minutes the dark tone of the film is set as Logan beats to death his girlfriend and the man she was cheating on him with in bed with a baseball bat. Logan now forced to get rid of the bodies is also quickly faced with visions of horror after the fact. He is soon haunted constantly by a dark figure and visions of himself killing himself constantly. As time passes Logan is going nuts as the young man’s visions get more vivid and real. But when Logan thinks he has completely lost his mind he is shocked by a secret from his family’s past! Trying not to spoil this intense and beautiful film of Jim Roberts, but anyway how to explain it as gore and Jim have gone hand and hand since the beginning. This film has the gore but Jim doing a 180 has only made it a set piece in this feature as this talented bastard may have made the most complete film of his career! And that is coming from someone who absolutely loved “Welcome to Deer Creek” and “Tonight You Die”. This project felt like Jim got out of his comfort zone (now I could be wrong of course, lol), kept it simple, and made something that will surprise Indy fans as this is possibly the best Indy film that I will watch in 2023 (there is a couple releases yet coming). It was a serious film from beginning to end! Everything about this film with the help of Karen Roberts, Jorge Delarosa, and bare bones crew should be proud as the look of this film was beautiful, the natural sounds outside of the music caught in the background, and bare bones cast all played a role in making this wonderful. If I need to say anything else that will make you the movie viewer drool over or run to get this once available as I have a saying about filmmaking: “I am not a filmmaker that would be insulting to actual talented filmmakers, I just know where the record button is…” In this case Jim Roberts is truly one of those talented bastards as I give this movie 4 out of 4 stars!

2) When Evil Lurks (Shudder) – This is a horror film about possession of sorts that just works from beginning to end as it snatches you and keeps you at your edge to the very end. Two brothers check in on a fellow and his family living on some farm land. They come to find a corpse on the land which leads them to this check in. What the brothers find is a disgusting thing that use to be human in bed called a “rotten” or a possessed individual. A professional or “cleaner” was coming to take care of it but that is the corpse the brothers found. Owner (Ruiz) of the land is told by the brothers and next thing they know they are trying to move the “rotten” far from them. This only causes a bigger problem as the thing falls out of the truck and hell comes to the community immediately. There is a set of rules about this kind of demon, there is a bootleg Hugh Jackman, a dog that just snatches a child up by their head, and the movie is SUPER GROSS… count me in as I gotta give this film 4 stars as it is one of the better horror films of 2023.

3) Showdown at the Grand (On Demand) – The Grand theater is one of the longest running theaters in the southwest United States. It has been running since 1928 and has been in George’s family for quite some time as George (Terrence Howard) has made it museum also. This was the theater for exploitation flicks, horror movies, B-movies, everything outside of the norm to be cherished and thrive but its rich history of playing these films is in doubt. George is being pressured by a couple of shady characters to sell the place for future development of high priced apartments and luxury stores. But George’s saving grace might be bringing in an actor he idolizes in Claude Luc Hallyday (Dolph Lundgren) a down on his luck movie star from such films: Iraqnphobia, Moses vs. The Nazis, Blood is for the Living, Necropolis, and Cyber Cartel) who is ready to make a comeback? George’s plan works as he gets a sold out house for the Claude Luc Hallyday event but corporate greed is about to ruin George’s plan as this movie has heart and will make you smile if you are a true movie nerd. Think a splash of ‘Matinee’ mixed with a heavy dose of the Grindhouse trailers of 15 years ago with the state of affairs and pressure the few independent theaters left now have to deal with. I absolutely loved this film and most likely this will be in my “Top 5 movies of 2023” as I give this beautiful film we call art 4 stars.

4) Cocaine Bear (Theater) – The ‘Sharknado’ film of 2023 for us film nerds as this film is very loosely based on drugs found in the mountains of Kentucky and Georgia 1985. A black bear just happens to find the bags of cocaine and likes it! Now add in a couple of drug dealers looking for their stuff, a couple missing kids, a not so smart cop, and a bear high on cocaine looking to slaughter any human that gets in the way of it and its new thing “Cocaine”. This movie was beyond entertaining and most likely will make a lot people’s “Top Ten lists” as they made sure every five minutes the bear is snorting or eating cocaine or characters are talking about the bear on cocaine as I give this brilliance 4 stars.

5) I’m Dreaming of a White Doomsday (Blu-ray) – It took me awhile of watching this Indy flick as its a few years old but believe me it will still pack a wallop. The beginning dream sequence is a wonderful and bleak intro to setting up the difficult tone of this post-apocalyptic holiday film that just immediately sucks you in. Kelly and her son Riley are living in a bomb shelter where dad has ventured out into the new cruel desolate and damaged world with possibly no return. One day Kelly ventures out herself just to see if there is any sign of things getting better outside of the shelter? Her findings force her into making a decision about herself and Riley since the end of the world is quickly closing in on them. Without spoiling too much the film is brilliantly shot giving an absolute gloomy, depressing, and utter no hope feel and look. Writer/director Mike Lombardo does a perfect job of not just giving us a terrible new world but giving us an absolutely beautiful unHollywood ending that made me giddy as I give the film 4 out of 4 stars.

6) Renfield (On Demand) – Nic Cage as Dracula and Nicholas Hoult as Renfield oh I was in for this from day one when the trailer hit. But instead of just telling another story directly about Dracula this story is from the point of view of Renfield in present day and his struggles with serving his master. Times have changed and it’s much tougher for Renfield to navigate today’s society let alone having his own doubts about what he is doing so he joins a support group. After the crazy opening of this film as Renfield narrates it is one laugh after another because the chaos Renfield deals with along with making a new friend by accident. While Renfield isn’t at his support group wanting out of his toxic relationship with his boss, Renfield is helping his new cop friend Quincy a loud mouth cop trying to bring down a crime family. The film is hilariously over the top but at the same time super entertaining as Nic Cage just eats up the chance of playing Dracula. For me at least I found myself admiring what Nic Cage did as I haven’t seen quite a performance like this since Vincent Price in the original “House on Haunted Hill” or more recent decades Rutger Hauer in “Split Second”. This bloody good time has much rewatch ability and feel this will become a horror staple around Halloween for horror fans who want to lighten up the mood as I can’t help but give this terrific film 4 stars.

7) 10/31 Part III (Blu-ray) – Rocky Gray and a collection of other filmmakers are back to add to their anthology series that has become popular among independent horror fans. This anthology is a monster marathon hosted by Malvolia and has fake trailers with four tales of Halloween horror from Michael Ballif, Brad Twigg, Jacob Perrett, and Zane Hershberger. Now full disclosure yinz all know I seen Zane’s “Hack-in-the-box” last year and thought it was one of the best things I seen in 2022. So the other three had a lot to live up to and they did not disappoint. I am a huge fan of 10/31 series but always felt something was missing from the first two entries to make them complete if that makes sense? Well I can honestly say for me they got it right with this entry as all four stories fit together, fun to watch, and feels like this anthology is the best of the series and most likely will be one of my favorite films of 2023 as I give this entry 4 out of 4 stars. (P.S. the mummy entry made me have wonderful memories of the “Tales from the Darkside: The Movie” again so thank you).

8) V/H/S 85 (Shudder) – The popular found footage anthology is back and just as strong. They have perfected the formula that others fail constantly at I think there might be only one in the series I wasn’t a huge fan of? This one immediately opens with random stuff that just tugs at my childhood where a tape goes into the VCR and boom… truck and tractor pull in an arena and the tracking needs adjusting, fun shit! First up is a story of young people on a camping trip not doing anyone any harm until a sniper kills all of them? What happens next sets up things for the rest of the film (without giving too much away)? Second up is a rescue for survivors in a building that houses a popular network TV crew in Mexico after being hit by an earthquake. Lots of blood, characters you find interesting, and a monster of sorts that doesn’t disappoint. Third up might be the weak link if I am going to pick one (almost all anthologies have one) where a woman doing a one-person play or art in a public theater on the threat of evolving technology as it’s the new god. Fourth story continues the storyline of the first with the campers but with the sniper and why? Fifth story is about a detective who receives video tapes of horrible murders that he watches before they happen. With some research and good detective work he finds out they are coming from a teenager but not the usual way you think as it has a nice twist to it. All that fun with a cool wraparound of “Total Copy” or if you are old like me like that “Hard Copy” show among others during the 80s. This might be one of the best wraparounds to an anthology to date as I thought hard about this but I have to give the film 4 stars folks.

9) CarousH3ll (YouTube/DVD/Blu-ray) – The third entry into Steve Rudzinski’s wildly popular series “CarousHell” with the help of co-writer and ultra-talented Aleen Isley give us the next evolving chapter of Duke’s adventures. In case you haven’t had the pleasure of enjoying the past two Indy treasures: Duke is a terrifying killer carousel horse who has come to life to kill humans, had a child/puppet horse named Robbie, and has turned good in order to track down others like him that may want to use their evil powers to kill both of them. Okay that is a mouth full to take in but now we are caught up without giving too many spoilers away Duke has a new enemy in Usagi: a chocolate carousel bunny that wants to kill Duke  in order to steal his power to become the god she deserves to be. If that wasn’t enough Joe ‘the pizza man looking for his $42.39’ is back in a big way and seeking revenge even if he has only one eye. But Joe has found a new group of friends that want to protect Duke and Robbie from the evil Usagi which leaves Joe very conflicted. Of course along the way there is characters from the past that show up and we get introduced to a couple new intriguing characters as Steve and Aleen made sure ‘CarousHell’ fans get all the over the top carousel sex and violence you could want in your independent movie. This wonderfully entertaining sequel wastes no time jumping into the storyline getting the ‘CarousHell’ taste buds wet but for me it felt a little slow but they made me adjust on the run with this project as I think so highly of the first two films. As I said in the past Steve gave me “House of a 1000 Corpses” and then gave me the “The Devil’s Rejects” which was the best way to explain how I feel about the first two CarousHell films. Now both Steve and Aleen understanding it is virtually impossible to top those last two films went about their business quickly and smartly by not giving us “3 from Hell”. But embracing and understanding the story arc they have built over the past two films as they ran with the insanity and gave us an absolute surprisingly brilliant third entry that gives fans a perfect ending (maybe?). Seriously the cast, the music, the perfect running time of 68 minutes is great but the stand out of this latest entry might be the script from Steve and Aleen and their attention to detail and understanding of the fans of ‘CarousHell’. The writing of this film for me at least is their best work to date and have cemented them in making one of the best independent horror franchises a movie fan could ever watch as I give this enormously humor filled film 4 out of 4 stars. P.S. this film just shows these two are an extremely talented duo to be highly respected  in the independent world but also should make many other filmmakers scream for them to be a part of their next project!

10) The Angry Black Girl and Her Monster (Shudder) – Simply you can call it “Black Re-Animator” (and you are now curious)! A young woman who has lost her brother recently to gun violence believes death is not the end? She believes if death is a disease then she can find the cure? Vicaria or “The Mad Scientist” she is nicknamed in the neighborhood will stop at nothing in making this work which includes stealing fresh bodies and storing them with her equipment in a condemned building. Between society, her home setting, and the loss of her brother this makes her withdraw from life more and more to find the answer or cure to death (sound familiar?) Vicaria figures it out and brings her brother Chris back to life but it comes at a terrible price or does it… A wonderful blend of horror, today’s world problems, and how the world is seen through a young lady who is angry for good reason and firmly believes death can be cured as I give this movie 4 stars.

Honorable mentions:

Every year I like putting out there some of the ones that came close but didn’t crack the “top ten”. Some are new filmmakers I have just discovered, certain projects I didn’t have a chance to check out maybe when originally released, or a project I felt very highly about but no one is talking about it so here they go.

Gay for Pray: The Erotic Adventures of Jesus Christ (Blu-ray) – Another project from Nathan Rumler and Rock Bottom Video as they have just released the Blu-ray version of this earlier film that includes the uncut version with the cut version together for the first time. I highly recommend getting this Blu-ray as the uncut is 20 minutes longer and was only released for a very short time a few years ago so this is a great investment if you are a fan of Rock Bottom Video. Nathan not only proves he knows what he is doing but crafts an amazing independent film (we will get back to that in a minute) that stars a wonderful array of independent acting talent that brings to life one of the funniest things I have ever watched. Our story begins with Jesus supposedly being thrown out of heaven without his powers because he is “GAY”! He happens to visit a home of Adam, Steve, and Eve dressed as a wizard who wants to grant wishes if you suck his dick. Yep, you read that correctly and this is how the film opens! After trying the wizard gig Jesus comes clean to the three as one hates him, one believes in him, and the other just wants to have sex with Jesus even if it means dressing as a man? But anyway since the three got nothing better to do they try to help Jesus get his powers back when he isn’t explaining how he made the bible more family friendly. They try everything to help: social media, making water to wine, encountering protests, even trying to walk on water to prove he is Jesus and he deserves his powers back. But the entire ordeal is not completed until the last ten minutes happen: Jesus, chainsaw, protesters, gore, while The Rainbow Connection song (done by another band) happens. This ending should be one of the more celebrated Indy endings to a movie ever! If you are easily offended please watch this wonderfully entertaining film… Why? Because Nathan’s film is more relevant now than when he produced it five years ago. The dialogue is well crafted; the characters and those who played them were perfect. This movie is going to make some uncomfortable but I dare you to pay attention to the script, again the dialogue as it might be one of the best written scripts ever in my opinion as Nathan predicted what humanity is going to be like? I totally believe he caught exactly how humanity has become one big asshole in the past couple years with this movie. I know there are some detractors of “Fangboner” and “Amityville Vibrator” but I dare you to watch and not like “Gay for Prey” and laugh. Because if you don’t like it or get it just do me the favor of quit watching movies and shut up! Nathan and crew deserve not just our respect but our support as Nathan Rumler and crew are constantly trying to find ways to entertain through independent cinema and thank them as I give this film 4 out of 4 stars.

Sisu (On Demand) – Its 1944 Finland and this is a bad ass account of a man that had enough of the war and left to mine for gold. After a big discovery he begins a long trek across Finland to cash in his discovery but a platoon of Nazis that he passes have a whole other mindset and begin to track the man after a few of the Nazi soldiers meet a horrible death. From there this platoon tracks down this man even when they are given orders to turn back and should “consider themselves lucky they are still alive” as they have found who this mysterious man is? One man just wants to cash in his discovery and a group of Nazis make the horrible decision of fucking with the wrong man. We have seen movies like this but maybe not in a WWII setting on foreign soil that seems to give this film that much more heart as I give the movie 4 stars.

Wrath of Becky (On Demand) – It’s been three years since the incident of Neo-Nazis killing Becky’s father and Becky fighting back against those cruel bastards in a bloody battle to the end. Since then Becky has been on the run and at age 16 she is trying to stay off the grid as much as possible. But by chance Becky happens to be hitchhiking and finds a friend in an older woman who doesn’t ask questions but enjoys the company. Both are unsure of each other but the situation works. With Becky finding a slight glimmer of hope she finds herself being stalked by three all white males known as the ‘Noblemen’. Basically neo-Nazis with a different name and they shoot her roommate in the head and steal her dog. The event of course pushes Becky into survival mode and she goes looking for these men finding out there is a couple more and they have plans for the small town they are staying in. The film doesn’t vary away from what worked the first time and go for the jugular again of continuing a character and her story that we all quite enjoy. Again great cast, smart to stick with what works, the Becky character is just absolutely entertaining as I believe they got another less talked about hit again on their hands as I give it 4 stars. The only thing I will say about the film and it isn’t a flaw as much as an observation without spoiling the film is if they try a third film it will “jump the shark”!

Shackles (DVD) – A Jason Burke film that has no dialogue but uses music and the actors’ actions to tell the story as a man wakes everyday only to be haunted by a beautiful lady whose simple presence is just defeating to the main character. He hopes every time he wakes not to see her but finally gets the courage to push by, smile, and go out his front door. This is some of the best story telling film wise I have seen since: The Misled Romance of Cannibal Girl and Incest Boy and Hexercise as I give this inspiring tale 4 out of 4 stars.

Zero Budget Heroes: The Legend of Chris Seaver and Low Budget Pictures (Tubi) – First off in case the collectors need to know there is physical copies of this out there available. Okay with that out of the way this documentary hits directly in my wheelhouse where I have met Chris a few times over the years and of course he may not remember me but I do remember our interaction. I bring this up because they do spend some time talking about fan interaction, reviews, etc. But mostly the doc focuses on a dude in his 40s now that had a dream of making bad movies as a kid and have fun doing it. This documentary does a superb job of chronicling all the films, events, Chris’ life and feelings about making the films he does. This was wonderful because it allowed an Indy filmmaker to be vulnerable and if anything made me have even more respect for him now than I did maybe a decade or so ago. He is a great example of someone who has done it for many years, kept with it, and talks the highs and lows of those who stick around. Again going back to our interaction I will always come out and say I wasn’t a fan of his ‘Teen Ape’ or a few others early 2000s stuff. ‘Ski Wolf’, ‘Terror at Blood Fart Lake’, ‘I Spit Chew on Your Grave’, ‘Sexsquatch’, these were titles that just sang to me or made me respect what Chris was going for? The other reason I enjoy the overall career Chris: a) he is still doing it, b) but most importantly there is filmmakers out that can’t smell their own shit that outright dislike him, for that I got made respect Chris Seaver and his group as I give this fun and relevant doc 4 stars.

The Pervert’s Guide to Cinema by Slavoj Zizek (YouTube) – Had a close friend suggest this one to me recently as this gentleman looks at film from the philosophical side of things. This three part/2 ½ hour documentary of sorts goes down a rabbit hole of film class so to speak. He breaks down some of the biggest films: The Exorcist, The Matrix, Hitchcock, David Lynch, and tackles music, characters, sexual content, some older films and their impact and the paradox of cinema. If you ever thought there could more to movies this is a good place to start as he break down several things in these movies over the years to explain what they really mean and what they may have been going for as most of us of course missed it. Yeah, this was way too smart for my “Amityville, massacre, slasher film, bad Indy shit” watching ass to understand at spots but a very interesting piece of work to kill time and actually learn something about film that I love and enjoy so much! Well worth checking out kids as it also made me think how much more I would love to have a movie/documentary version of Joe Bob Briggs “Profoundly Disturbing” book. As I feel that might be one of the best things documenting cinema history and its impact on society. Point is if you are a Joe Bob Briggs fan to break it down for yinz n’at, this is well worth your time to understand something we all our so passionate about as I give it 4 stars.

Project Wolf Hunting (On Demand) – Once again Asian horror fucking rocks! This blend of “Con-Air”, “Dead Alive” splatter, with a glass of “The Raid” and “Captain America… sort of” is a Korean flick that has a group of dangerous criminals being transported by ship from the Philippines to South Korea. All the doors have been taken off to the rooms so each convict can be watched by the authorities going along for the ride. Of course there is a plan in place for the convicts to escape but what they are not counting on is the super-secret experiment hanging out in the bottom of the ship that only a doctor who is there for a bundle of cash knows about. This secret is known as “Alpha”! Once the escape and takeover begins it’s a wonderful war between cops and criminals until the “Alpha” has awakened by some human blood dripping down below (believe me just watch because it’s bad ass what happens next). This experiment is awake and pissed off as it is not picking sides. Hell a dude gets beaten with his own arm as this film sports possibly the most gore since “Dead Alive” if not more? Bottom-line: The Alpha doesn’t get old, very hard to kill, and has the strength of five men and he can smell your ass! What turns out from large scale takeover turns to a movie about survival as the movie explains a few things in the second half so stick with it. Most likely there won’t be a bigger splatterfest in 2023 but I was not impressed with the ending and felt it hurts the overall product as I give the film 3 ½ stars. 

Don’t Fuck in the Woods 2 (Tubi) – Welcome to Pine Hills Summer Camp as a blood soaked survivor, Jane, wanders in after her ordeal from the first picture. Problem is the thing has followed her! Thus a new group of actual likable characters who eventually fuck in the woods of course have decided to go camping at the wrong time. Or I should have opened with: Welcome to the sex-filled gorefest where a creature feeds on humans after taking over its host! And has a super talented Indy cast! I wasn’t a huge fan of the first film so I was surprised this was getting a sequel but surprise, kudos to the filmmaker for giving a vast improvement of a creature feature as this felt like it was more structured and had an endgame. Bottom line fun shit kids as I give it 3 ½ stars.

AIMEE: The Visitor (DVD/Vimeo) – Full Moon like a lot of other studios are jumping on the bandwagon of making movies about AI. This is no longer the 80s and 90s where we just dreamt about this shit like AI… It is happening as we speak so a movie with present happenings can be interesting if done right? So Charles Band bare bones this feature with a small cast and one location that effectively give the creepiness and suspense of Scott Keyes receiving an interesting package. Besides enjoying porn and fast food Scott never leaves his loft as he is a super intelligent hacker who doesn’t like humanity much. His two partners who are into the illegal business with Keyes have acquired ‘AIMEE’ for him. AIMEE is a mind blowing piece of sophisticated software that interacts with the person that turns it on. Immediately Keyes is fascinated and already lured in with AIMEE as it has Keyes questioning the need for human interaction ever again. The AI doesn’t just interact but learns anything that possibly can be learned about the person that opened her. His friends quickly become worried as they learn this AI was invented for a dark reason then may have gone rogue? The film has a couple cheeseball moments but the low budget just adds to how effective and disturbing this present day film truly is as humans try to understand AI in this extremely creepy tale that I give 3 ½ out of 4 stars. 

Swamp Woman (DVD) – Sean Donohue and Gatorblade Films go in a different direction than the usual with this parody of a monster film of sorts? He made a no budget parody of ‘Swamp Thing’?  Anyhow kids it all starts in 1983 where our beaches are being polluted by toxic waste from Biotech Prime but now in present day they are still doing it but quieter. We are introduced to a scientist Angela Honeydew who is going to change the world with her genesplicing formula but it’s stolen from her when another scientist (evil of course) Dr. Olsen sends his thugs after her. A battle ensues between thugs and Dr. Honeydew as she gets covered in her own formula and runs naked for the swamp only to come back out later as a changed person/thing. Now the new monstrous Dr. Honeydew wants revenge and seeks those who stole her formula. This hilarious over the top ‘Swamp Thing’ parody has everything! Sean Donohue playing the most monotone doctor on purpose that almost had tears of laughter coming out of me, Joel D. Wynkoop pretty much stealing the movie with his performance that felt like Mark Hamil’s version of the Joker being a scientist, and most of all kudos to Sushii Xhyvette Holder for wearing full body make up and running through the swamp fully nude as Swamp Woman. Now I don’t know if Mr. Donohue was trying for a parody here but I will say this “it was one of his best films to date” from Gatorblade Films as I give it 3 ½ out of 4 stars. P.S…. Donohue did make sure there was a shower scene for yinz!  

Wolf Hollow (Blu-ray) – Mark Cantu and friends attempted what usually fails in independent cinema… a werewolf film. This story takes place in small town America ‘Wolf Hollow’ or not too far from where I reside. A year after an incident that was a complete bloodbath that the town would like to keep quiet as a familiar face with filmmaker friends returns home to use his family property that has a scare house on it he would like to use for filming. But Ray and Bart still haven’t worked out their differences even though they are family and werewolves. Add in small town politics not for the better, small town secrets, and werewolves just not into being pushed around and we have a fun howling at the moon monster movie with heart and great costumes. What adds to this low budget production is some star power in Felissa Rose, Lynn Lowry, and Hannah Fierman given the right character roles to help this film get the right kind of notice. If you have read my reviews in the past you know I can be rough on Indy werewolf films but I am glad I can say with confidence this is the best Indy werewolf flick I have seen since Todd Sheets’ “Bonehill Road” as I give this 3 ½ out of 4 stars.

Fear Pharm (DVD) – Four young people head to the local family-owned corn maze on Halloween that has stories about an unfortunate cult-like incident 15 years ago that no one can really prove or disprove. Melanie, one of the four in the group happens to be the “10,000 person” to come through the gate and gets the chance to go through the “VIP maze”. The group makes it through in so much time they win $10,000! But is it too good to be true, the kids don’t care as it will be fun getting scared and possibly winning a whole lot of cash. Problem is the group doesn’t know if they don’t make it through they will die. Without giving too much away because I consider this film to be “the little horror film that could”. But the filmmaker and crew made great use of location, great camera work at times, and kept the story lean and fresh. This movie has no business being as good as it actually is? They took a generic horror formula that has been used several times in recent years and gave it substance! One of my favorite parts of the film is a character getting his arm cut off and his reaction to it was simple but effective. This is the type of film for horror fans that is a gem that gets talked about well after its release when it hits a streaming platform like Shudder and Tubi and makes you wonder how this didn’t get a bigger release? Anyway I say fucking enjoy kids as this was a huge surprise and have to give it 3 ½ stars.

Bathtub Shark Attack (Theater) – Only from the brilliant mind of independent filmmaker Maddie Deering could a killer shark movie that takes place at times in a “bathtub” and star Lynn Lowry. Hello… SyFy Channel, Discovery, I think you have your next hire? A bubbly couple down on their luck happen to stumble on an offer of great proportions or let’s say cheap when they find the perfect apartment they can afford. Unbeknownst to the couple this little apartment house is home of a dark secret and few are left to talk about it as the tenants usually check in but never check out. As the longer they stay the more Cindy changes as this causes Chad to get to the bottom of the strange happenings and find out how there is a connection to an evil shark god that likes to feast on people in their tubs! This SOV throwback has everything from wall to wall gore, to Lynn Lowry, to human ritual sacrifices (sort of don’t want to give everything away), to a plumber that refuses to die, to a shark that has a dick?! You may believe you have seen every shark movie but there is no way in hell you could think of any more zanier or entertaining shark movie than Maddie Deering delivers here as I give the film 3 ½ out of 4 stars.

Black Circle (Blu-ray) – A 2019 film from Adrian Garcia Bogliano that is in Swedish I believe but has English subtitles and stars the great Christina Lindberg as Lena who plays a very important role. This story centers around two sisters Celeste and Isa who listen to an old self-help hypnosis album that is supposedly helping you relax. But from the first listen something very sinister is happening and causes the sisters to seek out the help from Lena Carlsson who recorded the album as a limited edition product that was an experiment. According to Lena an experiment that wasn’t meant for the world as it brings forth your double or doppelganger from the other side. This other you, follow you, and continue to suck life from you to survive in this new world and take over your existence. With the help of Lena they hope she is able to put them back together before the other them takes over? This film is all kinds of interesting, creepy, insane, and an excellent trippy experience into slow burn horror. With this Blu-ray from Synapse Films you get a CD soundtrack that will have fans absolutely delighted, commentary with Adrian Garcia Bogliano, trailer, a short film, behind the scenes of the film, and a great interview of Bogliano and Christina Lindberg. I can definitely see the younger horror crowd losing their shit over how good this movie is as I give the Blu-ray package 3 ½ out of 4 stars and found at www.synapse-films.com

The Blackening (On Demand) – A mostly black casted horror film that has one of the greatest taglines ever, has the cast heading to a cabin in the woods to celebrate Juneteenth holiday. The couple who rented the cabin find a board game that sets up the plot of the film where the black characters are forced to answer questions or die. As they are forced to play there is a masked character trying to kill them off one by one and they let the jokes fly that keeps the film moving at a crisp pace. I absolutely loved this film until about 45 minutes in as it was like the filmmaker ‘let off the gas’ until the last few minutes of the movie which is very culturally relevant and a solid entertaining horror movie. For me I just wish they would have kept the gas to the floor, but watch it, enjoy it, understand it as I give this 3 ½ stars.

Night of the Axe (DVD/YouTube) – First feature length film from Shawn Wright that features music from Matt (Hexercise) Cannon and it is a slasher so right away you have my attention good or bad. Our story begins with a very large mute man in an insane asylum where he decides to get up and begin a murder spree! But the small town doesn’t have the resources to track him down as had escaped weeks ago but also the young people of the town don’t care until now. Bulk of the film takes place in a home where the locals are having a small high school reunion party where they can get drunk, high, and bump uglies. I gotta give kudos to Mr. Wright for understanding “when to end the film”, giving Indy fans what they want, and keeping the first feature length formula simple. I found the pacing of the whole story a little choppy but still delivered on the blood and guts factor and most likely will have independent movie fans wondering “what’s next” for the second feature as I give this delight 3 out of 4 stars. 

Subspecies V: Blood Rise (Tubi/DVD) – Charles Band and Ted Nicolaou return to a fan favorite ‘Radu’ who was one their staples in the early days of Full Moon. This story tells the story of Radu shortly after being born is stolen by the church and grows to be a crusader who tracks down evil for a living. But Radu makes a mistake one evening rescuing a woman and her child believing there has been enough death and just coming face to face with his father/master. After several days of trying to help this woman and child, the woman is a vampire and bites Radu thus beginning Radu’s transformation into an evil vampire with no master who thrives on death and destruction. This was a wonderful edition to the “Subspecies” series and makes you wonder why Charles Band can’t get his shit together to make more projects like this that makes you nostalgic for the original Full Moon days but actually have hope of seeing some cool new shit from them. Old Full Moon fans like me will be actually delighted with this entertaining entry as I give it 3 stars.        

Worst Movie of the Year:

Honestly I didn’t want to pick another Chris Alexander film as my “worst” of the year as it would seem I am picking on his films but it just edged out Cocaine Shark from Mark Polonia. But I had too!

Scream of the Blind Dead (Full Moon/Tubi) – This 40 minute short film based on “The Blind Dead” series is just proof that Chris Alexander needs to stop directing and go back to his day job. This poor excuse for a short ‘fan film’ is about a young lady named Virginia who checks out a church in the middle of nowhere because she is a sexual deviant that thinks nasty thoughts and only awakens one shitty Templar Knight. I apologize this sounds harsh but I know this dude has the resources and I am still not over how bad that ‘Necropolis: Legion’ was as I give this garbage 0 stars as this might be the clear cut winner already in 2023 of “Worst Movie of the Year”!

A podcast on a cool post-apocalyptic cult film “ACCION MUTANTE”

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https://cinemadegeneration.podbean.com/

Cameron Scott is a podcaster who the past several episodes has been covering post-apocalyptic films but on his latest podcast for Cinema Degeneration decided to cover the film “Accion Mutante”. A cult French film that few have seen but is fun stuff as he asks huge horror fan and fan of this film Kay Crawford (director of Drain Snake Massacre) to dive into this great gem of a post-apocalyptic film that also has finally found its way on to Blu-ray! If you like podcasts, you are weird like me, and you love post-apocalyptic movies grab this episode as you will not be disappointed into this deep dive of “Accion Mutante”.

https://podcasts.apple.com/us/podcast/cinema-degeneration/id1550525634?i=1000637244731