We dropped another episode of Bloodbaths and Boomsticks

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We return this week to talk once again about 3 fine fright flicks.  First Baron Frankenstein reanimates a sexy lady in the hammer horror flick FRANKENSTEIN CREATED WOMAN.  Then we talk about a true old time classic full of monsters in ABBOT & COSTELLO MEET FRANKENSTEIN (a first time watch for Kyle) And finally Kyle picks a new flick completely at random in 2020’s STAIRS a.k.a. BLACK OPS a.k.a. THE ASCENT… cause you know a film with 3 titles has to be awesome, right?  We also get into topics such as assorted Batman butlers, what we watched over Halloween, John’s dislike of Tenacious D, The greatness of Hell Night and the beauty of young Linda Blair, Kyle watched a great movie about a killer hair weave, We also got news, listener questions, and a ton of other fun stuff.  So download this episode or Scarlett Johansen will remake your favorite old time monster movie…. and we don’t want that.

http://bloodbathspodcast.blogspot.com/

Gross Movie Reviews #517

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Gross Movie Reviews #517

 

Scare Me (Shudder) – So this was the other horror film released this year with the same title ‘Scare Me’ where two strangers meet in the middle of nowhere to tell each other stories. Fanny and Fred meet while jogging one morning. Fanny – the best-selling scary and Fred – some random dude who works on ads and tries to get away from real life to see if he can make his dream happen? A power outage sends Fanny over to invade Fred’s space or cabin to order pizza and tell stories to each other. This would have made a great teleplay to play out on radio that I have listened too on many Friday nights driving back from Cinema Wasteland. I know I am going to catch heat for this popular film. But if you like an over 100 minutes of two actors who are reading a script to you the viewer and Chris Redd from SNL does cocaine halfway through for a break then you’ll be in your glory! I personally found the movie meh and not for me but I believe this was a film literally aimed at a certain audience and that was it as I give it 2 stars.

 

The Reflection (YouTube) – A super creepy short film from filmmaker Philip Brocklehurst where a man looks into the mirror too long and sees another reality. Scary thought is the other reality wants in more often than not as I give the short film 3 out of 4 stars.

Tales of Frankenstein (Vimeo/DVD) – This is an anthology that is a little different and interesting for ‘Frankenstein’ fans. Donald F. Glut takes some of his short stories he written and turns them into a film that Victor Frankenstein is the running theme throughout the anthology. The stories are set from 1887 to 1957 and vary throughout: the first story gives us an origin and a love story, the second is about greed, the third is a film noir involving a detective and a mad doctor, and the last story gives Frankenstein fans a little of everything including being set in Transylvania. I absolutely enjoy the twist on an old monster and its tales and doing it in the format of an anthology works brilliantly! A couple decades ago the film ‘Frankenstein Unbound’ proved you can tell a perfect story differently and if anything add to its mythology. Mr. Donald F. Glut does this without effort but my only complaint is the film looks way too clean (if that makes any sense to yinz film junkies)? Cinema fans this independent anthology is worth tracking down and making it a part of your collection and for friends to enjoy as I give it 3 ½ out of 4 stars.

 

Big Freaking Rat (DVD) – This film is a prime example of an idea that could be so awesome but ruined because nothing was totally seen through and looks more like crap just being thrown at the wall. Now I never expect an amazing giant rat movie every time out but I do expect a legit fun rat movie and this was not it. The film stars Felissa Rose a favorite among most horror fans who stars alongside a park ranger named Chief Brody who has supposedly help clean up a camping destination that was abused for years. Unbeknownst to him because two hillbillies dumping toxic waste into the lake a “Big Freaking Rat” is running around beheading humans and munching on their flesh to live. Before he can ever get the camping site up and running he must deal with the large rodent issue as it quickly boils down to teenagers and an exterminator vs. a large rat which was done with practical effects most of the time. Instead of keeping it simple and giving us a long lost SyFy Channel flick we get a movie that has you asking way too many questions during it instead of enjoying the “Big Freaking Rat” as I give it 1 star.

 

Theater of Blood (DVD) – An absolute gem of a film starring Vincent Price who is a stage actor about to make a comeback. His critics were so rude and shitty to the great Shakespearean actor he commits suicide in front of them. Two years go by and the critics start dying of horrible deaths in Shakespearean ways. Some of them believe the great play actor has returned from the grave but the authorities have trouble believing the story. But as the bloody bodies keep piling up they need to close this case before all the famous London critics are dead. This was my first time watch and like ‘House on Haunted Hill’ it just seems Vincent Price does his best work when the filmmakers allow him just be Vincent Price. Some decades have passed since this film’s release but this is an absolute treat for any horror movie fan as Vincent Price playfully allows his goons to destroy his critics until the ultimate climax! I just smiled how wonderful this film was from beginning to end as I give it 4 stars.

 

The Mummy (DVD) – This 1959 remake of the Universal Pictures classic got many people to pay attention to Hammer films as it stars Peter Cushing as John where his father, friend and himself discover a long lost tomb of Princess Ananka. When they open it they are warned to leave it alone or a curse would fall upon them. After the tomb is opened and some time passes the Mummy (played by Christopher Lee) is revived by a scroll and it wants revenge on all who were a part of opening the tomb. The film is absolutely beautiful looking but Christopher Lee literally steals the film as The Mummy and how he portrays it. Never got into Hammer Studios this is a good place to start as I give it 3 ½ stars.

Sebastian’s Unholy Flesh (YouTube/DVD) – Dakota Ray’s (writer, director, and actor) latest effort is about a shift in the universe or this case Lucifer dying for an unknown reason. This sets in motion a demonic presence known as Sebastian who sets forth and becomes flesh in order to obtain “The Unholy Book”. Just because this old evil is looking for the book that can destroy all mankind doesn’t mean other unholy evils are not looking also. The book changes hiding places on a regular basis but Sebastian quickly learns how to get it but keeping it becomes a much bigger issue as other demons want to fight to death in order to handle this great power! Dakota Ray goes super dark with this evil flick and is a cool slow burn. My only complaint on this ultimate evil tale might be I was expecting a satanic bloodbath but never got it. Understand that did not stop Mr. Ray and crew from putting together a fine tale about what would happen if the devil died? I give the film 3 out of 4 stars and can purchased at https://www.storenvy.com/stores/868254-dakota-ray-r-a-productions .

 

Any comments please send to grossmoviereview@verizon.net or www.facebook.com/grossmoviereviews . Remember folks always support your local independent movie theater, independent video store, and independent filmmakers! It will keep horror alive………

You can find all of my books at www.lulu.com just search for Gross Movie Reviews or Tim Gross there!

Plus you can always go to the greatest T-shirt place online or if you are in Texas visit the store of “Fast Custom Shirts” where T-shirt Joe is the only place you should purchase your horror T-shirts: Go to www.fastcustomshirts.com and support!

You can now purchase copies of Jagoff Massacre and our new feature Blood Freak DVDs online that I co-directed with Dan Boyd at https://drunkenyinzersproductions.company.site/ !  

Gross Movie Reviews #479

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Gross Movie Reviews #479

 

Fist of the Northstar (DVD) – Gary Daniels stars in this movie adaption a very popular comic in 1995 where he is a warrior in a post-apocalyptic landscape that must restore balance to the world. He is a warrior named Kenshirô who has been forgotten and believed dead until he resurfaces years later on a new path to fight Lord Shin who has kept the world in chaos. Has some Hollywood names and Gary Daniels did fine but the film has not aged well since its cable television premiere. Does it deserve a reboot? Possible but most likely get the same response when it first was released which wasn’t much here in the states as I give it 2 stars.

 

Escape Plan 3: Extractors (On Demand) – Stallone, Batista, and 50 Cent are at it one more time as a former associate’s son seeks revenge by kidnapping Stallone’s girlfriend and taking her to a hideous Russian prison. Not ground breaking but entertaining action sequel that keeps your interest enough to finish it and whet your appetite for the new Rambo film coming as I give it 2 ½ stars.

 

The Two Faces of Dr. Jekyll (DVD) – This Hammer film takes a little different take on the story as Dr. Jekyll is a scientist who is married to his work. Constantly experimenting he believes he may have found something that could revolutionize the world. In past versions of this story Jekyll turns into a horrible looking Mr. Hyde. Where in this version is the complete opposite where Jekyll turns into a handsome Mr. Hyde who spies on his wife banging Christopher Lee and flaunting it all around town while he works day and night. For Mr. Hyde it is not enough he wants to relish all the sins of the night life until it’s too late and he tries to fake his death. Not the best Hammer flick definitely worth the watch as I give it 2 ½ stars.

Fisted! (DVD) – It is that time of the year again where friends head to the woods to have fun. But that comes to a screaming halt as giant ants eat porn stars doing their thing and a dude named Jerklin Boy destroys his victims with his ‘Fist’! When this killer uses his fist on his victims their heads explode. The Jerklin Boy looks like a generic Leatherface which only adds to the hilarious kill scenes in this Tom Martino feature. If that wasn’t enough Joe Garcia makes sure you will never look at a potato the same again. I laughed my ass at least a dozen times watching this as Mr. Martino has his own unique style of storytelling and makes his own movie rules up. “Fisted!” is entertaining as hell but not for the humans that have no humor in their lives as I give this feature 3 out of 4 stars and can be found at www.DWNProductions.net .

 

Eyes of Fire (DVD) – In 1750 a couple kids wandering the woods along the river bank are picked up and tell a French soldier a tale of why they left a haunted forest. Story begins with a priest who has stolen another man’s wife and has convinced a few villagers to steal a ferry, food, and begin a new adventure. An adventure of them floating down the river and finding land they can call their own and live the way they want to live. They want to find what they consider the promise land. After having a run-in with some Indians they go deeper into the woods where the natives believe the woods are haunted by evil spirits. The group finds a burned, wrecked cabin that they decide to settle and rebuild. But weird things almost immediately begin to happen to the group and the priest relies a lot on a young woman known as Leah who is a witch. Odd film for 1983 but just interesting enough I was glad to track this one down and check it out as I give it 2 ½ stars.

 

The Toy Box (DVD) – I always enjoy a completely off the wall idea that involves horror movies. The weirder or combining characters the better until I came across and watched this film that stars Denise Richards, Mischa Barton, and a bootleg Michael Caine. Bootleg Michael Caine wants to take a trip in a used RV with his family after his wife’s death. What bootleg Michael Caine doesn’t know is it is haunted by the spirit of a serial killer. The serial killer many years ago used the RV as his traveling killing zone. This movie was super lame and poorly executed. Thus proving maybe not all completely crazy horror movie ideas should be made as I give it a ½ star.

 

Boarding School (DVD) – A surprisingly different horror film that does a slow and interesting burn about a boy about to be a teenager whose grandmother has died. Quickly the boy Jacob becomes obsessed with his grandmother he never knew. This leads to the parents finding him in his grandmother’s dress and BOOM! Off to boarding school. But not just any boarding school? A very elite boarding school where a teacher played by Will Patton takes his job serious and has a strict way of kids being schooled. What seems like a horror film that is going to play with the gender bending rules goes into a very mysterious direction as the class is filled out with kids that maybe different and have a handicap. This slowly blossoms into a wonderful horror film as kids begin to show dead almost on a nightly basis. This film has some cool sick shit going down and I like it as kids die and the film keeps you guessing of what will the characters do next as I give it 3 ½ stars.

Django the Bastard (Blu-ray) – I have always enjoyed the Clint Eastwood westerns and only recently have scratched the surface of all the other spaghetti westerns from the past. This was a first time watch and a wonderful one at that as I did see the similarities in this 1969 film that Eastwood did later. The film is also known as “The Strangers Gundown” is about a mysterious man named Django who was believed to be dead many years before. He walks right in town, places a cross in the dirt with the man’s name and date of death. This is just bad ass! Through flashbacks of the Civil War we come to learn Django and his fellow troops were abandoned by their leaders and he has been searching for the three for years. Anthony Steffen has the stare down as he just shows up in town and takes on a whole gang of gunslingers wanting the last man he is looking for. This western actually separates itself from many of this time as it almost has horror movie kinda feel with how it is shot. This maybe my first watch but it will be watch many times more in the future as I absolutely enjoyed the colors and the horror overtone of revenge by Django. The Blu-ray looks beautiful and the commentary by the historian is very interesting if you are a fan of the spaghetti westerns as I give it 3 ½ out of 4 stars. Of course you can find this at www.synapse-films.com .

 

Critters Attack! (DVD) – Another poor attempt of getting this franchise off the ground again but at least nowhere annoying as “Critters: A New Binge”. A young lady Drea who is stuck living with her uncle and having trouble getting into the college her mother went too takes on a babysitting job that may help. Soon Drea and her brother get caught up with a Critter princess who has come to Earth to kill the male Crites. It becomes a retelling of “Adventures in Babysitting” only with Crites and Dee Wallace. Their heart is in the right place but the lack of understanding what made the first four films such a fun hit with movie fans is lacking. Can a good reboot be done, maybe, but the damage has been with these two latest efforts… What happens after this remains to be seen but I doubt we will see anything other than a minor budgeted unsuccessful sequel that has nothing to do with anything as I give this poor effort 1 star.

Any comments please send to grossmoviereview@verizon.net or www.facebook.com/grossmoviereviews . Remember folks always support your local independent movie theater, independent video store, and independent filmmakers! It will keep horror alive………

Don’t forget you can also hear Kyle Poling, John Shatzer, and me talking about horror flicks on the Bloodbaths and Boomsticks podcast at: www.bloodbathspodcast.blogspot.com .

Plus you can always go to the greatest T-shirt place online or if you are in Texas visit the store of “Fast Custom Shirts” where T-shirt Joe is the only place you should purchase your horror T-shirts: Go to www.fastcustomshirts.com and support!