Gross Movie Reviews #672

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Operation Undead (Amazon) – A Thai zombie flick without it being called a zombie film that is set in a fictional story set during true events of World War II. The Japanese army is advancing their way into China and India and wants to find an island where they can use their new experimental biological weapon. The Japanese government and Thai governments meet for peaceful negotiations to allow the Japanese army travel through but the experiment has already landed at an island and it is ravaging the island quickly as police and military assess the damage. Now with the Fumetsu virus out there the Japanese scientists want live specimens for further experimentation but that is being hindered by how quickly the virus is spreading among the islanders. The virus turns the victims into cannibals who can of course infect others but is allowing them to still have brain function to think and see who is human and non-human. The Japanese convince Thai officials they must act quickly to contain this virus. A fun twist for horror fans in this genre to decide if it’s a true zombie flick but also entertaining and enjoyable for the back drop the story is set in as I give the film 3 stars.

What Scares You (DVD-R) – All around talented individual Jason Burke’s latest short film comes off as a bootleg early Nick at Nite one-off from the early 90s that has four friends checking out an old house as they plan to stay the night? The friends challenge each other to speak about “what scares them” along with some tense conversation unknowingly that their fears are about to haunt them. One by one the friends die from what they fear most but before you make judgment on what appears to be hey “I have seen this several times before”, the evil twist is what makes for some scary fun to enjoy as I give the Mr. Burke’s latest 3 out of 4 stars.

Violent Streets (DVD-R) – Another not released yet feature from Indy filmmaker Brad Sykes has unearthed another exciting project he made around 1994! This ambitious project isn’t so much a horror movie as its gang picture on no budget in the vein of 70s and 80s high school gang films. There are two small gangs who were friends at one point but now see things differently as they constantly battle for the upper hand on the other. It becomes personal when one of the battles between Orin and Kane is over a young woman Sara to see who gets to have her for their prize. But Sara isn’t having any of it even though her pals think she is just getting herself in more trouble of not going along with it. Now Orin and Sara must be on the run as this gang war is about to turn deadly. For no budget this was a very ambitious project but Sykes makes up with its gritty SOV style that gives the content a certain charm as the heart of the actors just going for it take after take makes for a very watchable piece of cinema that I give 3 out of 4 stars.

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Killer Kabbage (DVD) – In a not so serious futuristic film with a hilarious concept has scientists in present day 2024 trying to solve the world’s food crisis with experiments on veggies, mostly cabbages! But 200 years in the future the world is a wasteland where a duo of Cage and Gibson look to survive by hunting killer veggies until they are approached by a government droid. The droid instructs the duo to head to a secret location as they are recruited as mankind’s last hope because of radioactivity reasons! The mission is to time travel to 2024, find the original experimental cabbage, and bring back a sample that started this apocalyptic war between killer cabbages and humans. Once the duo time travels and adjusts to present day of 2024 the fight is on as there is limited time before the war begins as they quickly find out the experiments are already out of control! This feels like a lost project from the early 90s from J.R. Bookwalter or the Polonia Brothers with a ‘Bad CGI Sharks’ vibe to it and I absolutely freakin loved it! Don’t be surprised if this pops up on my “Best of 2025 list” as this Indy feature had me laughing out loud several times as I give it 4 out of 4 stars as you had me at Killer Kabbage.

The Psychic (Tubi) – The 1977 Lucio Fulci film is also known as ‘Seven Notes in Black’ as this was a first time watch for me of Fulci’s early work. A young woman Virginia had a vision of her mother committing suicide at a young age and now has had a vision of a woman murdered then buried in the wall of a home. Virginia goes to see her therapist also ex-dude to speak of it being something more but it’s her ex-dude. Problem the home happens to be her new hubby’s house and the cops arrest him on suspicion. Virginia complains to the authorities that there gotta be more to this so she takes to doing her own snooping and heads down a rabbit hole of trying to prove her hubby’s innocence. As Virginia gets deeper in the rabbit hole she begins to have more visions that come true leader her to the killer. For me this piece of Fulci work had more filler than killer but sure there is fans of this project as I give it 2 stars.

City of the Dead (Shudder) – A young college girl in Nan Barlow heads to Whitewood, Mass, to research witchcraft on the advice of her professor (Christopher Lee) so she can turn in a great term paper. Nan’s interest is peaked once she enters this hard to find village and believes she needs to dig into the past immediately. The history of the village is they burned a witch at the stake who cursed all there and Nan is warned to leave quickly by the local priest as he claims evil owns the village and has for hundreds of years. Not long after that Nan goes missing without her professor being too upset by it but her boyfriend and brother soon try to turn the village upside down looking for Nan as the witches are not happy as they may ruin their ritual. Might not be the best of the witch horror films but it is intriguing with Christopher Lee playing the professor who seems to know all that is going on as I give the film 2 stars.

The Temptress (DVD) – An early film project from a young Jeff Kirkendall at the time in 2000-2002 that also includes a short film ‘3 to Murder’ that is a prequel but we will get to that in a bit. The story is about three women who are vampires trying to live life quietly among humans until Angelique shows up demanding the presence of her “first one” Rachel. Angelique and her minions refuse to allow the three to live their undead loves peacefully as she has never gotten over Rachel for not believing in her vamp ways. The project is definitely very rough around the edges and a product of the time in independent cinema at that time but it’s clear you can see Jeff Kirkendall and Tim Hatch were going to be building a relationship in films for a long time coming. Plus the short film (40 minutes) ‘3 to Murder’, the prequel sheds a lot more light on the  story in ‘The Temptress’ that includes a deleted scene that answered a big question for me after watching both. I am gonna guess reasoning behind the short film and the feature is: one, wanted to see if they can do it with what they had? Second, might be Jeff might have made an executive decision that if kept the short and feature together they would be too long and viewers would tune out? Third, breaking them up Charles Band style for more content?  No matter what it is an always fun finding an early project from Indy filmmakers you respect and see where or how far they have come as I give ‘The Temptress’ 2 out of 4 stars.

Any comments please send to grossmoviereview@verizon.net or www.facebook.com/grossmoviereviews .

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Gross Movie Reviews #671

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Rumpelstiltskin (UltraHD/4K) – Okay Terrorvision did you just seriously release this on 4K? Fucking wild since I haven’t watched this film since its release in 1995 as it comes from the same dude that gave us ‘Leprechaun’ of course so it was time for a revisit. So after stealing a baby hundreds of years ago Rumpelstiltskin is cursed into being a rock by a witch. Now present day, a prego wife who has lost her cop husband in a senseless crime finds herself a little later at an oddities store where she buys the rock. She takes it home, she has the baby now, wishes her husband to be alive (after they bump uglies of course in a dream) and now this little demon is chasing her or she is chasing it because it wants the baby’s soul! By the way Rumpelstiltskin smokes cigars, hard to kill, can drive a motorcycle and a long haul truck which fun fact the producers of this flick are the same dudes that gave us Scooby-Doo and Thundarr the Barbarian! This fairy tale terror is not as much fun as Leprechaun but it’s packed with a commentary, making of segment, Shot on VHS behind the scenes stuff, and even has a baking segment as I give it 2 ½ stars and make you say “fuck it” and watch it anyway.

Colossal (DVD) – This 2016 film is about a character Gloria who just happens to be an aging party girl in New York who has a boyfriend that supports her until he has had enough of her all night partying. Gloria being thrown out is forced back to her small town home where her parents died but left her their home. She stays there to decide what’s next besides trying to no longer drink but at the same time Seoul, Korea is attacked by a mysterious giant monster. As the attacks become more frequent not exactly explained to the world Gloria and friends become intrigued? Gloria figures out it have something to do with a childhood trauma at a playground that wasn’t there but is now with her friend Oscar. The film becomes about unresolved childhood trauma, friendship, and Gloria just trying to figure out life. For me the film is neither good nor bad as it had me waiting for something else to happen but never did. But for those that like this film this just “wasn’t my cup of tea” as I give it 2 stars.

Cutter’s Club (Tubi) – A newer but older Charles Band release that stars the legendary fine actor Tony Todd. This was one of the many unfinished projects of Mr. Band from several years ago that he finally got a crew together to unearth it and put it out there for fans. (Way too many stories about why, but this isn’t the first unfinished project that has found its way out there from the Charles Band magical warehouse recently. That is for a whole other conversation sometime.) Jill is a med student in the process of becoming a surgeon believes she could do more research with a disgraced great doctor that could change the world? This great doctor is Doctor Roberts and up until a year or so ago the university loved him until it was found out he was banging Jill so instead of firing him they place him in the basement of the east wing where he continues his experiments… with his odd satanic-like minions. Jill convinces her boyfriend after an experiment with a cat that the right thing to do would be to join forces with Dr. Roberts to further research. The purpose for all involved is “Art of Flesh” but they need more than animals for their big experiment and bring to life a creature with two heads. This 2005 film felt a bit thrown together then and still does now but enjoy seeing the potential in Charles Band finishing some of these “unfinished” projects as I give this 2 ½ stars.

Zombie Repellent (Tubi) – A soon to be married couple find themselves lost and without their car (believed stolen) in the middle of nowhere. They get to a small town that has no hotels, no Wi-Fi, and just a little weird as they can’t sleep as they uncover the town has a zombie problem. Now the couple must do everything they can with whoever will believe them during their misadventure to survive the zombies. There is some parts I am leaving out on purpose because it does have some funny parts but the bigger thing is the movie has an ending that isn’t ‘what you think it is’ so understand why this is more of a vague review as I give the film 2 stars.

Alien Intruder (VHS) – Thank you to my good friend Jon Cross for pointing out PM Entertainment to me this wild movie filler 1993 space gem stars Maxwell Caulfield, Billy Dee Williams, Jeff Conaway, and Tracy Scoggins! It is 2022 A.D. as Nick Mancuso and a few other prisoners are pulled out of New Alcatraz to use their special skills for a rescue mission or salvage mission. Little they know Tracy Scoggins plays a renegade VR program that has infected the ship they are going after and just enjoys making mankind lust for her and then kill each other. With most of the film being filler of Tracy Scoggins being the Ariel program or just being gorgeous the crew tries to disable the program so they can escape this hell. Fun cast in a low budget film that is so low budget it feels like they filmed it all in a K-mart warehouse and basement will always spell fun time to me as I give it 3 stars.

Beast Mode (DVD) – Literally this is one of those films released in 2020 that I cannot tell it was that big of a mess the studio didn’t know what to do with or like a lot of films that year it got “COVIDED” . Anyway we have a beaten down on his luck producer in C. Thomas Howell who accidentally kills or believes he does his meal ticket aka star in Huckle Saxton. Howell’s staff finds a double to pass off as Huckle for a movie project and uses this underground herbal make-up to pass him off. Problem is the make-up is known to make someone who uses it into a bloodthirsty beast. Meanwhile the real Huckle Saxton wakes up in a storage unit and from there the plot just gets real murky at best. No matter what, I found C. Thomas Howell to be the gem in this huge mess as I enjoyed his character throughout but still can only give this film 1 ½ stars.

Arkansas Pigman Massacre (Fawesome) – Another massacre film acquired but problem is they should have thought twice about making it. The film claims the events of the film take place in 2004 where two 12 year old girls go with a big brother randomly to the woods only to be stalked by a guy in a pig mask for most of the film. Or to save us all a bunch of trouble of me ranting about this film I like to call this movie: Look ma, I have a drone! Also I watched ‘In a Violent Nature’ last year and I was always a fan of ‘Texas Chainsaw Massacre’ but for some reason I wanted to have the plot of my film literally not make sense. Hopefully that explains this mess of an Indy movie that I can only give it 0 stars. Want to know more of my breakdown please find me, buy me a beer, and we will have an educational conversation? I so wanted this to be a no-budget fun mess instead I got a turd that someone calls a movie!

Side Effects May Vary (DVD) – A movie project I wish I would have seen sooner as even before we get into the review this will make it into my “Top Ten list of 2025”! So J.R. Bookwalter returns to the director’s chair for the first time in 23 years along with help from writer and star James L. Edwards. Glenn has been sick for several weeks during this pandemic and doesn’t exactly believe in the science behind the new vaccines even though his wife has gotten it. Because of his illness lingering and nagging from his wife Glenn heads to the doctor’s office to get treatment. But because of the illness he cannot be vaccinated but can be part of this experimental shot that can be given during illness. He takes it believing he is doing the right thing for himself and others. It isn’t long after Glenn experiences side effects of blurred/weird visions, then also after a very uncomfortable but hilarious sex scene with the wife his dong falls off! From there Glenn becomes a gooey monstrous mess with murderous tendencies. As Glenn’s best friend gets involved, cops get involved, weird things begin to happen as Glenn’s disgusting meltdown is absolutely glorious with a perfect ending to this social commentary. This independent project is a prime example of doing all the little things right equals’ success as JR and crew put on a Masterclass of “how to make your independent movie correctly”. This was a perfect pandemic film that many have tried and failed at making so congrats to JR and James for bringing this adventure to life as I will be talking about it for years. As I give this project 4 out of 4 stars I also have to say Brinke Stevens steals the show here kids as this is her best performance since ‘Sorority Babes in the Slime Bowl-o-rama’! The DVD has a great Q&A for their opening night of the film done by none other Art Ettinger.

The Gorge (Amazon) – Two snipers are recruited to keep watch for 365 days straight over a gorge of unknown origin for uncertain reasons. Mostly they just know it’s supposedly for their country. One on the east and one on the west as shortly after World War II as the story goes three Calvary groups went in and never came back so an international treaty for this gorge was made. It is believed to be the “gate to hell” but as the two become curious about each other and decide to meet which by the way is not allowed as the two fall in love and share stories of what they know. But an incident has both trapped inside the gorge as they soon learn more than just monsters are the problem and it is part of something bigger? This is one of those “I liked it but didn’t love it” as it felt more like a video game adaptation of something thrown together. I enjoyed the concept but also felt like the movie was missing something as I give the project 3 stars.

Screamboat (Fandango) – Another unfunny adaptation of Steamboat Willie going into public domain as the Staten Island Ferry is haunted by the real life Steamboat Willie when it is released from its chamber. The killer rodent slaughters his way through passengers in a pretty boring way but I did enjoy ‘the lower deck scene as this is how we kill off 98% of the passengers in one fail swoop kind of thing’. The movie runs 30 minutes too long, the Disney references border on super annoying, and if you are into Jason Takes Manhattan combined with a bootleg Gingerdeadman vibe then hey you found your movie as I give it 1 star.

Berserker: The Nordic Curse (Tubi) – A 1987 film that I thought I had seen in the past but got it mixed up with two other Indy films I seen like 15 or 20 years ago so this was my first watch of the low budget horror from the 80s. The story takes place in nowhere Utah called ‘Rainbow Valley Campgrounds’ where supposedly Vikings hung out in the tenth century? Some young people are there for a week of camping only to be warned by George Buck Flower and the lone sheriff that there are wild animals out there “so be careful”. The kids get partying; read some stories of the Nordic legend, then one of them wander off to pee and its game time for the Nordic spirit or… the killer bear. Glad I got to see it but yinz arenot missing out on much folks as I give it 1 ½ stars.

Any comments please send to grossmoviereview@verizon.net or www.facebook.com/grossmoviereviews .

Plus you can always go to the greatest T-shirt place online or if you are in Texas visit the store of “Fast Custom Shirts” where T-shirt Joe is the only place you should purchase your horror T-shirts: Go to www.fastcustomshirts.com and support!

Gross Movie Reviews #670

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Black Candles (Plex TV) – For starters this film is available on streaming but also had a recent Blu-ray edition and keep in mind its Spanish for those who hate reading subtitles. Anyway getting into the meat of this 1982 film, Carol’s brother dies abruptly so her and her partner fly out to the middle of nowhere to be with the sister-in-law Carol who isn’t impressed with. Within minutes arriving Carol questions Fiona the widow because of the strange circumstances she feels in her mind. It doesn’t help Carol when she arrives at the mansion she immediately smells strange smells, hears her brother’s ghostly voice, hell she has a dream of bumping uglies with her brother… Which that is when I questioned if I tapped into some weird PornHub video or I was watching some serious softcore shit? But also if you didn’t know there is some serious Satanist shit going down in this film because they got some goat fucking going on kids! While all this is going on Fiona seduces Carol’s partner with the sex, orgies, and SATAN! But it’s already too late (maybe?) as Carol is supposed to be Satan’s bride as this coven punishes a dude with a sword to the anus! I won’t ruin the ending but I will say buckle up kids for full bush and you questioning if you are watching a horror film or a full blown porn either or I was entertained as I give it 2 ½ stars.

Freaky Tales (Internet) – For as advertised and heavily waited for this movie got pooped out there into the universe long before its release dateso that leaves way too many questions that has nothing to do with the film. Anyway, I will say the filmmakers got the formula of an anthology down right for this very loosely based tale or tales on events that happened in 1987 Oakland, California. First story is about teenage punks protecting their hangout from Nazis, second story is about two girls getting their chance of a lifetime of being rappers at a rap battle, third story is about a guy who is paid to collect debts and wants to retire, and the last story is about Sleepy Floyd the basketball player which I found the most interesting tale of the whole film. To me at least the film felt heartless, felt like this film sat on a shelf for a couple years before its release to the internet, and really felt like a more of a west coast thing if that makes sense. Or as I like to say to save time, “this film wasn’t made for me” as I felt like I had to sit through 80 minutes of a boring movie to see what I really wanted to watch as I can only give it 1 ½ stars.

Shivers Me Timbers (Amazon) – So there is a third horror film about Popeye and this one sucks goat balls to put it plainly if you are asking me. This version decides to go the lazy way in my opinion of trying to put a plot together of being 80s nostalgia claiming it is based on real murders? Takes place in 1986 when Halley’s Comet was a big thing and strange things happen around it when a small ass meteor enters a pipe of an old fisherman. This is how he becomes mutant Popeye or in my opinion A.I. Popeye bullshit! He quickly finds teenagers out in the woods looking to watch the comet so he can murder horribly only for the film to become a crappy image of several past horror favorites that this doesn’t even come close too? The movie was made in Scotland which explains a lot because honestly I would be surprised if the people there really knew Popeye or the impact of the cartoon had but that is for another conversation as I can only give this tragic piece of poop 1 star.

Captain Kronos: Vampire Hunter (DVD) – A Hammer film on so many levels that leaves you with you so many questions because it has such a different vibe for a vampire film along with why there weren’t several sequels? First off it needs to be stated for this 1974 film that it stars the timeless beauty Caroline Munro! But this basic story in the English countryside has a couple of young women drained of their youth that has the interest of Kronos and his traveling professor companion since the war ended and  they now have been fighting a new war against vampires. What’s new and still different till this day at the same time is this odd vamp flick sets up a whole other set of rules and explains even within the film not all rules apply to every vamp. If you are a young horror movie lover or old this movie has a kind of timeless effort and a different vibe than your usual Hammer flick for the mere reason of this odd vamp plot. Without giving too much away as I have watched this three times in my life and believe I have seen something different like John Carpenter’s The Thing is the film comes down to a very dark family secret that is unknown to all. I love the concept and I am curious why some of the most recent so-called talented filmmakers haven’t tackled this as a remake or a sequel as I give it 3 ½ stars.

Jules Verne’s Mysterious Island (DVD) – It is weird to say what I grew up on and how many movies I watched in my life to never come across this film? The film’s plot begins in a Civil War prison in Virginia at the end of the war where some soldiers who are prisoners plot to steal a hot air balloon during a devastating rainstorm. The escapees get off the ground but after a long travel is forced to an island where they must help each other to survive. What also throws the characters off is everything on the island they encounter is giant! When Captain Nemo happens to show himself they come to learn Nemo had traveled here or shipwrecked in so many words has been doing experiments to better human life in the future but has a dire warning about the island itself as they all must leave sooner than later. This 1961 film is more adventure than a horror film and is a great intro for the younger audience into how special effects can help a film as I give it 3 stars.

Robot Holocaust (Blu-ray) – Oh this beauty has popped up again since a legit Blu-ray for whatever crazy reason has made it out into our lives but for those that don’t know this is a product of Wizard Video/Empire Pictures. Yep, Charles Band kids… but it is an actual film made by Tim Kincaid of ‘Mutant Hunt’ fame but this can also be a prequel to Robot Jox, Robot Wars, Crash and Burn. Anyhow in this low budget post-apocalyptic world the robots have long took over and the humans are slaves in most places. But in the location of New Terra (or in the rumble of certain parts of New York) humans are alive and well but slaves who are used to fight each other for sport until Neo arrives. Neo is a product of the wastelands that has somehow survives the atrocities of the wastelands to come and start a revolution against the robots. He helps lead them to a power station to go fight the darklord for their freedom.  Hilariously fun and stupid at the same time this film was literally out of print for many decades as it would randomly show up as a bootleg or on a channel for a one time watch so you be the judge as I was just happy it had a legit physical copy. The movie might not be much to desire but the interview on the Blu-ray might explain some things as I give it 2 stars but will never turn down watching this one more time as it looks glorious in this restoration.

Final Recovery (Tubi) – A moderate budgeted Indy film that stars Richard Tyson plays with some uncomfortable realistic storylines… Addiction, recovery, etc., you understand what I am saying? Not a laughing matter as this film takes this subject very seriously begins with 1974 a young lady seeing her father confronted with an addict and killed. Decades later, Nanny Lou runs a present day treatment center called SAGE. This is supposed to be a safe place for addicts and this is where Rodney our main character comes in. Rodney is our everyday addict having trouble sticking to the program with the exception he does have an excuse as he doesn’t trust Nanny Lou? Her effort is there but for nefarious reasons. After Rodney is brought back to the facility once again he finds a friend there and explains Nanny Lou cannot be trusted as it’s all about the money but patients start to disappear on a more regular basis which also raises the red flag. A great movie with a very black passionate heart that tackles a tough subject of life with some wonderful characters you will grow attached too. The film is smart, evil, and playful all at the same time as I give the feature 3 out of 4 stars.

Any comments please send to grossmoviereview@verizon.net or www.facebook.com/grossmoviereviews .

Plus you can always go to the greatest T-shirt place online or if you are in Texas visit the store of “Fast Custom Shirts” where T-shirt Joe is the only place you should purchase your horror T-shirts: Go to www.fastcustomshirts.com and support!

Mario Dominick will be missed

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Well had some terrible news today that I never expected and sure quite a few of you in the Pittsburgh horror scene were as surprised as I was to learn Mario died yesterday. I never know what to say about things like this but Mario was a one of a kind person and I absolutely felt honored that Mario considered me a friend. His family is wonderful and I am still in shock of this news. R.I.P. Mario you will be missed big time my friend!