Gross Movie Reviews #631

The Man from Hong Kong (DVD) – A 1975 martial arts Australian flick from none other than Brian Trenchard-Smith who brings together a great cast: Jimmy Wang Yu, George Lazenby, Roger Ward, Hugh Keays-Byrne, and Sammo Hung. A legendary Hong Kong policeman (Inspector Special Branch) beds a Sydney newspaper reporter in the first few minutes of the film not knowing he will be seeing her again soon in Sydney. His job is to head to Sydney to pick up a suspect who is a part of a drug connection between Hong Kong and Sydney but when the suspect is shot the Hong Kong policeman goes on a one man wrecking crew of Sydney! Two detectives key the Inspector Special Branch on a man named Wilton who owns most of Sydney because everyone knows he is dirty but they cannot bring him down? Think “Lone Wolf McQuade” several years before it was made with a ridiculous amount of crap getting busted up in this movie. This movie deserves a watch if you never had the pleasure as you will not be disappointed in this over the top martial arts 4 star action!

Mad Max Exposed (Tubi) – An hour long documentary on everything Mad Max that covers everything from the stunts, the people who were a part of them, how they planned the movie, the design of the cars, to nothing stopping George Miller in putting together a film that changed car chase scenes forever. All of the cast exception of George Miller and Mel Gibson share stories throughout the hour that will have any Mad Max fan beaming and entertained in seconds as I give it 4 stars.

Dario Argento Panico (Shudder) – A documentary that thoroughly goes through the career of the Italian horror master and those who worked with him. The film takes you on a deep dive of Argento and what exactly lured and inspired him into filmmaking. There is also in-depth interviews with both of Dario’s daughters, yes you heard me right… both daughters! I only knew of Asia. Dario also has conversations about how his filmmaking shaped his family through the years as this is not just brilliant but eye opening doc on the legendary filmmaker as I give it 4 stars.

Valerie (YouTube) – Philip Brocklehurst never stops making stuff has yet another short film where it’s an artistic look at a man who believes there is nothing left in his life if he cannot have his love. A very heavy look into love and some underlying subtext of love if you are paying attention as I give the short film 3 out of 4 stars.

The Leprechaun’s Game (Tubi) – A boring shady character (bootleg Robert Patrick) employs two fools to track down the leprechaun’s gold at the end of a rainbow? If found the duo can make 100,000 pounds! If you haven’t noticed this is a bootleg British Asylum Entertainment version of the popular ‘Leprechaun’ series that has two losers finding the gold within five minutes? But this of course is not the whole plot as they plan to spend it instead of giving it to their boring shady friend. And it doesn’t take long for the bad make-up looking leprechaun come a killing (very shitty kills by the way) for his gold coins. Oh this was hot garbage on fire from beginning to end as if I call it a parody of the original ‘Leprechaun’ that would be super insulting as I give this movie 0 stars.

The Leprechaun’s Curse (Tubi) – So this terrible sequel doesn’t get any better as it picks up immediately after the end of the first film having the leprechaun is still reclaiming his stolen gold. Tilly inherits a huge home whose father built it with the stolen gold. So of course she gets a few friends and they head to the big house with a pool just to be lame new victims for the killer leprechaun. Then you get the boring Tilly character filler trying to decide if it’s right to keep the gold? But nevermind any of that as there is a big thing that isn’t really explained in my opinion as the Mischa character returns when she was seen about to be killed at the end of the first film? What gives? Does bootleg Leprechaun decide at the last second I don’t feel like killing her because she is prego? Only to kill her in front of the kid anyway six months later, WTF? There are so many questions about this dumb movie because it comes off like the two movies were actually one split into two but didn’t enough material for either as I give this 0 stars.

Deep Fear (On Demand) – A British shark film that steals from 70s treasure hunt flicks where the shark is not the main plot as a woman must fight for her life against two drug dealers who are trying to get to their stash at the bottom of the ocean. Naomi is sailing on her yacht to see her boyfriend (or rich people with rich people problems) but finds two people who are floating with boat wreckage. Naomi trying to do something good by herself helps the two assholes and they take her prisoner and that is pretty much the whole movie as I give it 1 star.

Amityville Ripper (DVD) – Ron Bonk produces another useless entry into the “Amityville” series and that is #57 if yinz are still keeping count? Anyway the Amityville home has finally been demoed and the artifacts or contents of the home are being sold off. Hey, didn’t this happen already? But let’s move on as the character Marianne gets ahold of the knife that is supposedly “Jack the Ripper’s” knife and was supposedly at the Amityville home for some unknown reason. Once the knife is released from the box it’s Jack the Ripper (bad accent and all) beginning to kill again! Now it’s up to a couple friends to contain this great power. There are so many problems with this so-called movie I feel like I would be picking on it just for laughs. But there is literally only one redeeming thing about this entry and that would be seeing Indy newcomer Angel Bradford, a very talented Indy actress that will be fun to watch for years to come. Otherwise folks please don’t waste your time on this fruitless entry as I give it 0 stars.

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