Gross Movie Reviews #432


Gross Movie Reviews #432


Mitchell (DVD) – This cheesy 70s flick stars Joe Don Baker as a detective who seems to be a sleezeball but actually it just adds to his charm as a man just trying to do the right thing. Mitchell happens to be riding along with police who get a call for a burglar in a rich neighborhood. The burglar picked the wrong dude, Walter Deaney/John Saxon to steal from as Deaney was looking for an excuse to kill. Cops think its justice, Mitchell believes its murder. Mitchell decides to investigate for himself but gets thrown off the case to cover an old mob dude who may be tied to a heroin shipment coming in? Soon Mitchell becomes a target as he keeps meddling in both cases and they are connected. The film is one big cheeseball 70s flick that would be more interesting if we didn’t have two “Dirty Harry” flicks and a “Death Wish” flick out by the time “Mitchell” was released. I give it 2 stars.

Thunder Cops (VHS) – If you cannot find this movie under that title supposedly the film was also called “Operation Pink Squad II” at one point? This hilarious 1987 action/comedy from Hong Kong is one of those: “How much B-movie crap can we throw against the wall and it actually stick”. And thank god for allowing this feature find me. An upset husband who believes his cop wife is cheating on him learns she is going to hook up with her superior. What he doesn’t know he keeps overhearing their plans to go undercover as hookers as part of a police sting at a haunted building. The haunted building has a crazy ass monk trying to keep evil spirits in their place. But a vengeful ghost escapes the chaos and now is causing problems with the sting going down in the building. Eventually the monk, the upset husband, the undercover cops all must defend themselves against a ghost head that flies! Let’s not forget the green turd, mini-copters chasing the ghost head, and possible castration to invite a powerful elf which kills ghosts? Like I said crap thrown against the wall but great crap as I laughed my ass off and give this movie 3 stars.


Ravenwolf Towers (DVD) – Jake is a new assistant manager at a run-down hotel that used to be cherished by Hollywood types years ago. Now, it is just a weird dwelling for older people mainly who don’t venture outside or talk to anyone but themselves. But Jake quickly learns there is many secrets to the hotel when he has to go the top floor to fix a leak and finds a helpless woman named Mary. He helps her out but her family comes looking for her and goes back to the top floor without a real explanation. This is a recent ongoing new series from Charles Band that gives life to a project that has that old school Full Moon Pictures charm as I give it 3 ½ stars.


Ravenwolf Towers 2 (DVD) – The series continues as you learn more about the residents of the hotel and Mary and family on the top floor are building up to something big. Meanwhile Jake begins to speak with a new resident Ivan Ivanov, a supernatural investigator, who is there because of the strange family Jake, has had run-ins with. Pay attention Full Moon fans as some of the characters that live in the Ravenwolf Hotel are characters from past Full Moon movies which gives this series an interesting twist as I give this episode 3 stars.


After School Massacre (DVD) – Jess who is the popular girl in school and likes to have sleepovers has just had the weekend that sucked. A so-called friend or new girl she felt bad for just committed suicide at her sleepover and her teacher Mr. Anderson just said a photo of hers was ‘cute’ and a ‘friend request’ on social media. So Jess and her classmates fuck with Mr. Anderson and doesn’t care about the suicide decide they need to have another all-girls sleepover to get over things. Of course Mr. Anderson gets fired over the friend request on social media by the school and snaps killing two faculty members. Unbeknownst to Jess Perkins and friends Mr. Anderson is killing his way to the sleepover but that is okay because Mr. Anderson is weird anyway, “because he puts mayonnaise on his chicken nuggets.” Low budget, I laughed a couple times, not a ton of blood, I give the film 2 out of 4 stars.


After Party Massacre (DVD) – Most of the film consists of Death metal music footage from a couple bars which is the backdrop for this movie. Little story happens as most of it consists of chubby boobs and chubby girls banging during the metal music which isn’t a bad thing if it was full porn? But in this case it is supposed to be a horror movie about a woman named Scarlett who almost gets raped in a club, has flashbacks, and begins slashing her way through random club goers. Not even the great acting talents of Nic Pesante or the vile story of penis mutilation makes this horror film bearable. For that I give this movie a ½ star out of 4. Unless you were trying to make a porno instead of a poor excuse for what is called a horror movie then you are on to something? But the ½ star is only because the music was pretty cool.


The Creature Below (DVD) – A little known creature/Lovecraftian film from the UK about a woman named Olive who is on a deep-sea dive and has some trouble with a strange creature. The crew brings her up and all the equipment is busted including the suit which causes her to get kicked off the boat because she cannot remember what happened. Olive does grab a black egg from the suit and takes it home to study it? It hatches and spits black goo at her and now she is a part of this odd new species that is causing her to act differently to friends and boyfriend. As time goes on she believes she must protect this ‘god’ and feed it… humans. Hey Lovecraft fans if you haven’t found this one yet it is worth a watch as I give it 2 ½ stars.

4/20 Massacre (DVD/Vimeo) – A group of young women head to the woods to go camping and let their freak flag fly in celebration of 4-20 but also for a birthday weekend. While venturing into the woods the women are warned by a park ranger to not hang around and definitely not go looking for the weed farms that are nearby. Especially since the weed farmers have taken justice into their hands recently. A man out of his mind finds the women babbling about a thing chasing him but they don’t pay him any mind. They party, enjoy the woods, until a man/thing begins to slaughter them and smoke their weed believing they took its crop. A very entertaining slasher film that doesn’t over thinks the plot or force its way down your nerd gullet. It plays out like a good slasher film should. Is it perfect, no way, but it is well worth adding it to your horror film collection. Most horror films portray everyone that smokes weed as stupid and therefore the plot should be stupid this film does not do that. And I thank the filmmaker for that as I give this trippy horror film 3 out of 4 stars. For more details to check out on this new massacre: .


The Theatre Bizarre (DVD) – An anthology filled with buckets of blood and gore that includes segments from Richard Stanley and Tom Savini. The stories of horror flow like a good beer down your throat until you hit the slow moving segment “The Accident” which is good but just doesn’t fit in this anthology. Thus, the entry causes the film to slow down and no longer flow right except the in-between parts with Udo Kier being his cool creepy-ass self! I give the anthology 2 ½ stars.


Annihilation (On Demand) – Natalie Portman gets pulled into something you cannot imagine when her missing husband shows up at her door from a secret mission he was on. After being pulled over by the military and husband almost dying she is meeting with a scientist played by Jennifer Jason Leigh who explains an event that happened three years ago. Well an unexplained event involving something falling from space into a lighthouse that they now call the ‘shimmer’. Something is a rainbow force field that is expanding. It first just covered the lighthouse but eventually took over the swamp, the state park, and a community. It’s feared it will continue to spread all over earth? The government has sent several people into the shimmer but none have returned except for Portman’s husband which there are no answers for? So Portman, Leigh, and three other scientists make their way into the shimmer to see if they can get to the lighthouse and get answers. Once inside they encounter some very strange shit that is mutating plant and animal alike. Visually the movie is beautiful and plotted out very well. Honestly if the “Lost” TV show had any sense and could have been this instead of the ‘dreaming we are all dead’ bullshit it was. Sorry spoiler alert if you ever wanted to watch that poor excuse for a show? But I get the feeling many are not going to understand a film like this and feel this film might be a couple years before it is actually understood? We will see but if you want to enjoy a bizarre sci-fi flick to fill that void inside your inner nerd this film will it and more as I give it 3 stars.

Any comments or questions please send to grossmoviereview@verizon.netor . Remember folks always support your local independent movie theater, independent video store, and independent filmmakers! It will keep horror alive………

Don’t forget you can also hear Kyle Poling and me talking about horror flicks on a weekly basis on the Bloodbaths and Boomsticks podcast at: also available at


Plus you can always go to the greatest T-shirt place online or if you are in Texas visit the store of “Fast Custom Shirts” where T-shirt Joe is the only place you should purchase your horror T-shirts: Go to for details.


Oh it’s real and it’s happening… GROSSFEST! July 28, 2018! Go check out for all the details! 


Two new episodes for your listening pleasures


This week we welcome back our good buddy Jon Cross to the show to talk about one of our favorite subjects DONALD PLEASENCE in HALLOWEEN 6, TREASURE OF THE YANKEE ZEPHYR, and DOUBLE TARGET.  We also chat about missing Rutger Hauer in the new Blade Runner flick,  A brief history of The X-Files, Kyle falls down a Verne Troyer based YouTube wormhole, Vietnam flicks,  The awesomeness of Paul L. Smith,  Mothra hatred, and most importantly DONALD god damn PLEASENCE!!!!

This week Tim and Kyle get together to discuss a movie that is a hotly contested subject out there in internet land in THE SHAPE OF WATER.  Also we chat about a flick that could be called Victorian Ghostbusters in WINCHESTER.  And a flick about a killer clown before the glut of killer clown movies that we are getting now these days in AMUSEMENT.  Also we discover Kyle’s extreme hatred of Michael Shannon, Destroyed bathrooms, CHUDS, and other nonsensical garbage.  So enjoy!

“Night Stalkers: Paranormal Investigators” Now Playing on Amazon Prime.


The Paranormal Documentary ‘Night Stalkers: Paranormal Investigators’ by Wayne Poe (Hotel Camarillo) is now available on Amazon Prime (USA/UK/Germany).


The feature-length horror doc is also available for digital rental on Amazon Instant Video for only $1.99.


The synopsis reads: “Ghost hunters in Southern California document the paranormal activity inside allegedly haunted locations including the Linda Vista Hospital, the Zalud House, the Anaheim White House, and the Suicide Bridge.”


The 59-minute investigation into the supernatural follows a group of California men and women dedicated to hunt and document the paranormal activity around them.


Night Stalkers’ can be streamed now for free with Amazon Prime here:


Trailer Link



Los Angeles, CA – With its U.S. release date quickly approaching, genre distributor Terror Films is releasing two clips from Stephen Cognetti’s found footage, haunted house feature film debut, HELL HOUSE LLC. The clips are titled: “What Really Happened?” and “How Many Freaks Did We Have?”

The film is set to be released on Tuesday, November 1st, 2016 across major digital platforms including: Amazon Instant, YouTube, Xbox Live, VUDU, Sony PlayStation, Vimeo On Demand, Google Play and iTunes. On iTunes it is available for for pre-sale, here:

The film will also be released on Amazon Prime, the 24-Hour Movie Channel on Roku, DVD and Cable VOD at a later date.


The award winning film, which was an Official Selection at Fear Fete and Telluride Horror Show, stars: Danny Bellini, Ryan Jennifer, Gore Abrams, Jared Hacker, Adam Schneider and it also features: Alice Bahlke, Jeb Kreager, and Theodore Bouloukos.

Official synopsis: Five years after an unexplained tragedy on opening night of a Halloween haunted house tour (Hell House), a documentary crew travels back to the scene of the disaster, to investigate the events of that night. During an interview with one of the original staff members, they are given never-before-seen footage taken by the staff of the haunted house. It reveals the terrifying truth about what really happened on the opening night of HELL HOUSE!

“What Really Happened?” Clip:

“How Many Freaks Did We Have?” Clip:

Official Trailer:

Official Facebook page:

For more information on Terror Films, go to:


“Some Ghost Stories are Real.”



“Some Ghost Stories are Real.”


Vancouver, B.C., August 4th, 2016: 3Brane Entertainment is pleased to announce that their horror film Blackburn will see more territories. Already slated for a North American release, this terrifying title will be distributed in the United Kingdom, on September 5th, 2016; Matchbox Films will handle the release. The film stars Lochlyn Munro (Poker Night), Jen and Sylvia Soska (American Mary), Sarah Lind (Wolf Cop), Emilie Ullerup (A Little Bit Zombie), and Calum Worthy. Developed from a script by Nastasha Baron, the film has been directed by Lauro Chartrand. A preview of the film’s multi-territory launch is available here.

The UK poster and synopsis reveal more of the Blackburn Asylum. Long since closed, its former residents roam the local woods. A forest fire and rockslide have forced more of these dangerous characters into the nearby town. And, five friends must find shelter, before they become targets of these monsters. Can they just survive the night?

In the UK, the film has been rated 15+. Also, the new poster hosts a unique tagline: “some ghost stories are real.” But, these ghosts are worse than anything supernatural. These terrors will be set upon the masses on September 5th, on DVD. This dark, horror story is not to be missed!

The official Synopsis: A forest fire and rock-slide trap five bickering college friends in a small Alaskan ghost town with a horrifying history. When they seek refuge inside the torched ruins of Blackburn Asylum, they must fight to survive as the angry inhabitants slaughter the friends one-by-one.

More details at Matchbox Films:

Available for pre-orders, at Amazon:

A fan page for the film: On Twitter:


Ghosts, demons, occult figures… Paranormal Panel on 11-8-14



Ghosts, demons, occult figures…


Are you a closet believer, an avid ghost hunter or a skeptic? Join us to discuss this topic at Rickert & Beagle Books! Panelists include Matt Demas, Kelley Sparks, Tim Gross, Nick Noir and Moderator Christine M. Soltis. Check out their bios below:


Matt Demas: Panelist


Matt Demas aka the Demon Zombie, is an author in the horror genre. He wrote a three story zombie series and later republished the 3 sequences in 1 full length novel under the title, The Fall of Pittsburgh. He did this in order to break free from a notorious, scheming publishing company. In 2010, he founded Demon Zombie Projects and later published his first title of new material in late 2013.


Matt Demas is an unorthodox writer, but that is where his passion is, horror in particular.


Outside of writing, he used to do ghost hunting and haunted tours. After a fallout with his founding partner, he went out on his own. He no longer did tours. He stuck with the ghost hunting and paranormal research. He mostly did private investigations and house calls. After 2010 he hung it up and began to focus more on his DZP label. Matt Demas is from the zombie capital and has a goal to break into the film industry and make an impact in the horror films and change it for the better.



Kelley Sparks: Panelist


Kelley Sparks is a single mom of 2 beautiful kids who took up the hobby of ghost hunting in the latter part of 2008. She joined the Southwestern Pennsylvania Paranormal Society fronted by Joe Ciferno. As a member, She was lucky enough to have experienced a number of various happenings including shadow figures, voices, evp’s pictures, email hits and even being tripped on a tour of Nemacolin castle. The group has investigated various cemeteries including Redstone and Quaker, did home investigations, Nemacolin Castle and Darr mine.


When that Group disbanded, she was lucky to find a group out of Greensburg called Mystic PA. As a member of Mystic, she also had many experiences in cemeteries, homes and Hillview Manor. They were lucky at one point to have been invited to investigate and work at Brooke Hills Spooktacular in West Virginia. Those investigations involved an old Victorian home where many members of the team had experienced activity while working the spook house.


At present, she is not involved in ghost hunting but would very much love to start doing it again.



Tim Gross: Panelist


Tim has a more skeptical viewpoint on the paranormal. He is a rare breed of horror movie fan in the same spirit of Chilly Billy, Joe Bob Briggs, and Rhonda Shear that makes you want to see or should I say experience bad horror films. But Tim and his trusty Yuengling beer in hand has a knack for spewing out random information about Full Moon films that Charles Band doesn’t even know, condensing the most absurd sequels to horror films into a paragraph, and points out some very hidden gems of horror films that many do not know about.


His writings of movie reviews, good or bad, has found him respect among many independent filmmakers as he takes the time to watch anything sent his way from Jon McBride to Fred Vogel to a random never heard of filmmaker in Finland recently.


Between his ramblings, he has also found himself in several independent film features as an extra to a few speaking roles that has eventually led him to directing a short film and co-directing a feature in the past 12 months. And all this in the search of free beer and free horror movies in hopes of willing a new Leprechaun sequel or starring in the next Puppet Master flick or just living the dream of watching, making, and being a part of fun horror films!



Nick Noir: Panelist


Nick Noir is the owner/operator of The Eyes of the Oracle. A natural witch, hailing from the Black Mountains of North Carolina, he comes from a long line of witches, freemasons, tarot readers and spiritual guides.


The Eyes of the Oracle offers spiritual guidance through tarot readings, house blessings, spell jars, and spiritual jewelry. His focus is to combine mind, body, and soul

by use of energy work, crystal healing, and communication with Spirit.


Nick has been a practicing spiritualist for all of his life without actually knowing what he was preparing for! Over the past 5 years he has grown very insightful into tarot, crystal healing, ritual magic and communicating with

other worldly beings.



Christine M. Soltis: Panelist/Arranger/Moderator


Christine M. Soltis is an author, actress, scientist and lover of all things intellectual. She has written dozens of books and countless articles, acted in a handful of shows, arranged panels, travelled a great deal and is always ready for the next stimulating event. She has degrees in Broadcasting and Environmental Studies. Her books can also be found on


Christine has always had a fascination with supernatural and otherworldly beings and creates journalistic/arts episodes via SolsticeNightSky Productions, which features panels, science, travel, artists and events in the local area. These episodes can be found on YouTube at


Christine will be acting as co-host for tv show Serotonin After Dark beginning in October 2014. Christine also works in the field of private investigations. Her additional interests include travel, time travel, futuristic societies and countless other items.