Gross Movie Reviews #574

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Gross Movie Reviews #574

Doctor Death Seeker of Souls (DVD) – This hilariously fun horror flick from the early 70s centers around a man name Fred who is trying to get over his wife’s death and feeling somewhat guilty? Last thing she said to Fred is, “she will return to him”. Fred hanging on to this spends several months tracking down séances, etc., trying to contact his wife, but no luck. Fred is introduced to Doctor Death who has a mysterious past and works like a magician but not so fast he has some dark powers of transference or transferring a soul to another body for a certain fee of course. Doctor Death is paid $50000 by Fred but nothing happens… Disgusted by the act Fred calls it quits and starts bumping uglies with his hot assistant. But Doctor Death cannot let it go and begins a murder spree of women trying to make this one transference right? I believe this glorious 70s cheese still works and worth checking it out like I did if you never heard of it as I give it 3 stars.

The Weirdsies (Blu-ray) – One of the last films from Indy filmmaker Chris Seaver in 2015 who now has turned to doing episodic TV for his You Tube channel did a disturbing parody of ‘Stand by Me’. A funny but yet disturbing adventure of four friends who want to lose their “V-card” during the summer. Their adventure is because they know about a dead body and the plan is to go to it and fuck the shit out of it because supposedly after death the male boner stays erect for 48 hours? (I wasn’t going to look this shit up but you gotta admit, real or not, that’s funny.) If that wasn’t enough there is a group of bullies that want to beat these four virgins to the punch by finding the body first to ruin a good time. And for just for extra spice there is about 40 second-rant about running into cannibal hipsters that I am still laughing about many days after watching. Chris Seaver: intelligent, dumb, or indifferent I was never a huge fan of his work but throughout his independent film career he does seem to surprise me with a project where I believe he shows off a talent that separates himself from just being average. As he proves one more time with this timeless funny adventure I give 3 out of 4 stars.      

The Scarlet Agency (DVD) – Witch Doctor Films is back with another entry into the “Anton Rook” series. Anton Rook is no longer a trusted man by the agency but things change when an evil man may have found a way to produce an invisible man that would lead to making an invisible army for world domination. This invisible man seeks out Rook’s help to try and stop this madman and with Rook’s new protégé they craft a plan but as usual not all as it seems in Rook’s universe as no one can ever be trusted. As usual this independent film is well-crafted and goes from just feeling another fan-made episode of ‘Doctor Who’ to reaching deeper into the character of Rook and making it more of a well-crafted Indy James Bond flick! Well done my friends at Witch Doctor Films as yinz continue to go against the grain and produce some different and exciting independent projects to sometimes a stale genre of filmmaking as I give the film 3 out of 4 stars.

Blood Thirst (DVD) – A lesser known murder/mystery from the Philippines where several murders have taken place where women have been strung up and drained of blood. Miguel the lead investigator has a world renowned detective friend in New York and has asked him into his country to help solve these vicious murders. The detective a super white dude acts as a tourist to not attract attention while helping Miguel but both uncover something more sinister than they ever thought as the bloodless bodies continue to pile up! Maybe not the best serial killer film but definitely a good one from 1971 that has a little twist to what exactly is going on as I give it 2 ½ stars.

Without Warning (Blu-ray) – This is 1980 alien invasion flick that has a lot of cool people infront of the camera and behind the camera at the same time. An alien has landed on Earth in a mountain countryside of course where it is able to do its thing without question. A couple of cub scouts and hunters hanging out in the woods find this out the hard way as the alien throws starfish blood suckers at them like ninja stars! After some friends get separated and a couple become dinner for the killer starfish and alien their friends want revenge and go to the local tavern to meet up with a crazy war vet and a mean loner. The second half of the film is mostly the characters of Sarge and Taylor fighting over who is going to kill the alien instead of actually doing the deed. The Blu-ray has a few interesting extras that make this package exciting for horror film collectors to have their collection but I have always viewed this film as “one of those should have been better with all who were attached?” as I give the film 2 stars but the Blu-ray package itself 3 ½ stars.

Slugs (Blu-ray) – Plain and simple this is a horror film about killer slugs! A small rural town where people are getting eaten up killer slugs that may have mutated in the sewers when they were disturbed by a new strip mall project. The project is being built on top of an old chemical dumping area during the 60s and 70s and they have broken the seal causing the slugs to feast on human flesh! The heroes are two utility workers who must figure a way out to kill these things before they infest the whole town. The Blu-ray is well worth investment if a fan of the film as not only the film looks great restored as I believe for decades we all had that VHS/DVD release? But also this package has a couple commentaries and a few short interviews that leads into why and where this movie got made which I never knew the film was Spanish, cool shit people. I give this new Blu-ray package of ‘Slugs’ 3 ½ stars.

Homebodies (VHS) – This is a creepy and disturbing mid-70s film that may stick with you as a group of older folk are being driven out of their homes in the name of progress. Their buildings have been condemned and slowly they are being escorted out of their apartments where their have lived most of their adult lives. With construction happening all around them the leader of their group Mattie has a plan as she likes to watch the work go on or I should say her plan go into action? The group slowly sabtoges the new construction in order to have their evictions delayed but the rich boss doesn’t care how many of his crew die its progess! But these old folk will kill whoever gets in their way. It is terribly sad, hilarious, and screwed up all at the same time with an ending I really enjoyed. Been looking for a lesser sadistic horror film to brighten your day look no further than this film as I give the 1974 feature 3 stars.

Miami Connection (DVD) – Ninjas, a biker gang, with cocaine fighting a pop band in Miami who also just happen know martial arts… Yep, I will watch that shit! This 1987 film is like one big 86 minute fight scene that includes cheesy music that feels like it was stolen from an early Nintendo game as I give it 2 ½ stars for just entertaining the hell out of me.

A Meowy Dark Timeline (www.SteveBuster.com) – So Steve Rudzinski fans, Steve continues to make entertaining content for his streaming service outside of his wonderful features as this one is a short five part series that involves all the characters you know and love. The evil emperor is in another universe and has found a way to conquer this alternate universe as it fights its way through several of Steve’s characters from past films. This is a project full of heart for all those people who nerd out over what the talented Mr. Rudzinski has created over the years. You will laugh, you might cry, but Steve knows what to give his fans when it comes to content. So you asked for it and Steve provides as I give this short series project 4 out of 4 stars for the mere reason finding a way to include everything and available at www.stevebuster.com or on Blu-ray at www.silverspotlightfilms.com .

Hell of the Evil Dead (Blu-ray) – Rock Bottom Video who continue to produce smart and different horror titles for the Indy world to eat up has this fun project from a few years back that stars the talents of Brian Papandrea, Sadie Tate, and Nathan Rumler. This isn’t your ordinary feature as they go with a dubbed Italian version (regular English version is on the Blu-ray) to give the feature even more of a fun “Italian filmmaking feel” and it worked. Four friends go camping and stumble upon a graveyard out in the forest that after finding it weird things begin to happen: the path disappears, weird creature like sounds, and day turns to night without changing back. The four move deeper into the woods hoping to outlast or outrun this evil presence but things only get much worse when they find a trailer/cottage with a lone survivor to tell his story of what happened. Great acting, love the whole Italian dubbed thing as it gave the film a whole different feel to it, great pacing, and some good special effects work (head exploding). Indy fan don’t let the title fool you this film needs to be seen. Plus, there is a couple extras that include a disturbing “lost scene” from the film that needs to be witnessed (Thank you Nathan Rumler and Brian Papandrea for not taking yourselves too serious, that extra is glorious) as I give this film 3 ½ out of 4 stars. (Rock Bottom Video can be found on Facebook)

Robo Warriors (DVD/YouTube) – Kids, ‘Robot Jox 3’ or ‘2’ has been found… Wait a second there was another one? Yep, I didn’t know either until I was watching something that was sent to me by a great movie friend. The film is based on Stuart Gordon characters, has Richad Band’s music, giant robots fighting in the future for mankind, distributed by Paramount… Sounds like a sequel to me!? Anyway, by 2036 some aliens invade Earth and are complete dicks as they enslave mankind. A group of resistance fighters led by James Remar make their way into a jungle to recover an Earthbot. This is their only chance to survive and protect the planet. The mission fails but Remar’s character Gibson escapes and disappears. Some time passes but a kid has done his research and believes he can get the Earthbot going again if he can find it? With the help of Gibson they retrieve it and give humans hope again but they must use it to fight in one huge Robot battle with control of the world in the balance. Full Moon and Empire fans will go ape shit over watching this and if they never had the pleasure of stumbling over this feature as I give it 2 ½ stars.

Any comments please send to grossmoviereview@verizon.net or www.facebook.com/grossmoviereviews .

Plus you can always go to the greatest T-shirt place online or if you are in Texas visit the store of “Fast Custom Shirts” where T-shirt Joe is the only place you should purchase your horror T-shirts: Go to www.fastcustomshirts.com and support!

Gross Movie Reviews #483

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Gross Movie Reviews #483

Hitchhiker Massacre (DVD) – Like most recent horror films it claims to be based on true events. Honestly I really don’t care just because you already had me at the title so let’s get on with it. Apparently if you are a hottie and hitchhiking outside of L.A. things are not looking good for you. But Sally who has no car and of course hasn’t seen the Rutger Hauer classic “The Hitcher” says fuck it and starts hoofing it to Colorado. While camping, an older dude comes along to check on Sally as she is camping on a hillside near the road. Believing she could trust old dude she jumps in the truck for the free ride and hopes to get to Colorado quicker. Unbeknownst to Sally the hottie is old dude is in the business of slicing and dicing young people out in the middle of nowhere to sell their body parts. It’s a wonderful business according to old dude. He gets a text from the unknown buyer and he precedes carving out that organ and when to get rid of the body. The side plot is the local sheriff who is intrigue with all the desert disappearances and believes he is finally on the right track of capturing the bastard who is responsible. This movie has no business being as interesting as it was and I was happy with actually being entertained when I was fully expecting a big pile of goat crap! For that I give it 2 stars.

 

Undead Fred (YouTube) – The latest short film from filmmaker Sam Hodge that has a young couple spending an evening together by the edge of the woods. The couple is rudely interrupted when Fred is bitten in the ass by a zombie! Thus starting a zombie apocalypse! A good amount of gore, zombies, and a great intro for a future cool Indy feature that many will love as I give it 3 out of 4 stars. Let’s hope Mr. Hodge and company can give us an Indy zombie feature we all can sink our teeth into?

The Windmill Massacre (DVD) – You gotta love a flick that has the tagline: This isn’t hell. This is Holland. Jennifer is a young woman who is on the run from authorities and her past. She gets lucky and is able to jump on the ‘Happy Holland Tours’ bus before it leaves without a ticket. The tour of course takes a group of people and Jennifer to see the historical windmills of Holland. Along the way the bus breaks down and so is Jennifer as she is trying to decide if her dead father is actually back or she is just seeing things. After one person of the group is viciously attacked and dismembered by a dark figure the group sees an old windmill to take refuge at. As the group of people get to know each other trying to figure out what they should do next in order to get back to civilization things are revealed. This group of people and the bus are there for a reason so maybe it is hell? Great amount blood, awesome kill scenes, and the dark figure  happens to be a cool looking creature that makes this ‘massacre’ flick well worth the time of checking out as I give it 3 stars.

 

The Terror Experiment (DVD) – Here is a bootleg SyFy Channel flick with a solid cast that has flown under the radar of most of us. A virus has been released into the atmosphere of a building in an attempt to expose the U.S. government and all their dirty secrets. The biological warfare is brilliant but has no known antidote. People on the bottom six floors quickly become infected and start attacking anyone that enters. Meanwhile there is some survivors on the upper floors that are just trying to find a way out while government and emergency personal on the outside are not on the same page. Of course the government wants to keep everything quiet. What makes this virus-infected film entertaining enough is that the infected are not flesh eaters but just brutally attacking people. And the film is not trying to reinvent the zombie film but show how the government would most likely fuck shit up to keep it all quiet no matter what cause the virus was released for… So for that I give this little surprise 2 ½ stars.

 

El Toro Azul’s Monster Movie a Go-Go Presents: Night of the Living Dead (DVD) – The cool little Indy company Witch Doctor Films is at it again where a couple of masked Mexican wrestlers and their beautiful full-figured young lady co-host entertain in segments throughout the Romero classic. NOTLD is always the go to for horror hosts but Witch Doctor Films has done nothing but entertain me since I met up with them a couple years ago. So zombie fans another one for your collection as I give it 3 stars.

 

Occurrence at Mills Creek (Vimeo) – A short film about a broken family dealing with death but is the family truly broken? As the character Clara has flashbacks of her family trying to think if things could have been different. Is this a dream, a paranormal thing, or something maybe even more evil? One thing is sure this short film is a prelude of a potentially interesting horror feature of the same name coming in 2020 as I give it 3 out of 4 stars.

 

Exposure (Blu-ray) – A young couple (James and Myra) head to the mountains for a fresh start. There is a cabin there that James use to visit every summer as a kid and has some fond memories of. Once there the isolated surroundings begin to affect them slightly but differently. James after some prying from Myra tells the story of the weird going-ons and his family many years ago. As the slow burn story moves along it is apparent something unnatural is trying to unravel the relationship between James and Myra with a wonderful creature effects payoff. I give this slow burn Indy flick 3 out of 4 stars.

 

Easter Bunny, Kill! Kill! (DVD) – A holiday horror that was directed by Chad Ferrin and produced by Trent Haaga that deals with a special needs teenager. Now I was on the fence with the flick because it deals with a special needs kid and didn’t know if this was just gonna be cruel and dumb? So I gave it a chance as it deals with Nicholas who is 16, has special needs and is a big fan of the Easter Bunny! While Nicholas takes the trash out for his mom he has a run-in with a homeless man who trades him an Easter Bunny for a bag of bottles and cans. This makes Nicholas ecstatic as he loves the Easter Bunny. Meanwhile the next day is Easter and mom gotta work a double shift leaving the shitbag boyfriend in charge of Nicholas. Remington is a shitbag of enormous proportions as he is gonna pimp out Nicholas while he goes and gets a couple of girls for holiday pleasure. But if it is up to Nicholas and his new Easter Bunny friend some horrible stuff is about to go down and anybody that has looked at Nicholas funny is about to get fucked up by a bunny-masked killer! The movie gets a little sleazy at times but the slightly surprise ending makes it worth sitting through and cheering for the Nicholas character. I enjoyed the film overall but it could have left another five or ten minutes on the cutting room floor to give it a leaner murderous holiday feel as I give it 2 stars.

 

Any comments please send to grossmoviereview@verizon.net or www.facebook.com/grossmoviereviews . Remember folks always support your local independent movie theater, independent video store, and independent filmmakers! It will keep horror alive………

Don’t forget you can also hear Kyle Poling, John Shatzer, and me talking about horror flicks on the Bloodbaths and Boomsticks podcast at: www.bloodbathspodcast.blogspot.com .

Plus you can always go to the greatest T-shirt place online or if you are in Texas visit the store of “Fast Custom Shirts” where T-shirt Joe is the only place you should purchase your horror T-shirts: Go to www.fastcustomshirts.com and support!