Gross Movie Reviews #434

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Gross Movie Reviews #434

 

The Last Days of Livermore (DVD) – A man travels to Livermore Cemetery to confront his love. He believes it is time to move on from the relationship to other things but has second thoughts as he wants to be with her… Think of the short film as a horror love story with a splatter of gore as I give it 2 ½ out of 4 stars. The short film was shot in Livermore, Pa. and the Livermore Cemetery location look to be a wonderful spot for the film. For more details about the film go to:  www.facebook.com/The-Last-Days-of-Livermore .

Terrifier (On Demand) – A film from Damien Leone that I had been hearing things about for a couple years it seems. Well horror movie fans grab the Halloween candy and turn down the lights as there is a new fun Halloween holiday horror flick to enjoy! Art the Clown is out on the town Halloween night carrying his sack of goodies. Art not having much to say voice wise uses his actions to tell you what he is about to do. As Art wanders the streets a pretty young lady named Tara catches his eye and follows Tara and her friend Dawn into a pizza shop. Of course Dawn takes pics of her and the weird ass clown that keeps an eye on Tara for her social media page. From there it just gets creepy as hell as their car has a flat and Tara runs to a close by apartment building to use the bathroom. The fun holiday night goes to hell when Art the Clown shows up again to begin his bloody path to the girls and anyone that interferes. I love the whole thing of Art the Clown just existing and actor David Howard Thornton was perfect for the role. “Terrifier” wasn’t just entertaining but pure horror awesomeness as the film took the gore level up a notch with a great ‘death by hacksaw’ scene (poor Dawn)! The film was grim, gritty, and absolutely beautiful. Mark my words “Terrifier” will be one of the best horror films of 2018 as I give it 4 out of 4 stars.

Ayla (Vimeo/DVD) – The latest from ‘The October People’ and John Portanova is a wonderful dramatic thriller about a man who spirals out of control. Elton has always tried to hold on to his dead sister. She died when Elton and his brother were young but Elton refuses to move on. He struggles daily and when Elton and his girlfriend drive out to a house to fool around he believes he is seeing her again and again. The struggle gets worse and Elton returns to the old house like he is driven to go there and find something? Next thing you know Elton is digging under a weird tree and finds his dead sister… alive and thirty years older. Beyond happy he loses connection with his girlfriend and tries to explain to his mom and brother Ayla is back and this isn’t some fake person. While doing that apparently Ayla likes to puke fluids and be naked for most of the movie. Did Elton will this to happen? Is there life after death? Is it all just in Elton’s mind and we are along for the ride? Truly weird and bizarre tale that will make you think and want to watch it again. I enjoy what ‘The October People’ are doing as they don’t stick to a certain genre and try to give you something very different movie wise than you are use too. I give this cool weirdo flick 3 out of 4 stars. For more info on the film go to: www.theoctoberpeople.net .

 

Partners (DVD) – A 1982 supposed comedy has a straight cop and a gay cop go undercover in the gay community to solve a series of murders among gay men. Some bad jokes even in 1982 and a relationship blossoming between the two cops are the main plot points of the film. Surprisingly the cast is what kept me watching the film (Ryan O’Neal, John Hurt, James Remar, and Martin Kove). The film is watchable but it isn’t a “Cruising” as I give this forgotten comedy 1 star.

 

Bigfoot vs. D.B. Cooper (DVD) – Once again I am watching stuff I couldn’t make up if I tried unless I was David DeCoteau? A pretty boring film full of shirtless hunks, it’s November 1971 and supposedly in the woods turkey hunting in the state of Washington. A man named Bernie now older tells a story of how and why he knows the real story of D.B. Cooper. There is a reason the authorities have never found D.B. Cooper and it’s all because of Bigfoot. And Bigfoot is a Peeping Tom apparently? Weird shit so of course I watched it as I give it a half star only for having voiceover work done by Eric Roberts and Linnea Quigley.

 

The Plague (DVD) – A small community called Love Canal in Canada has been used a toxic dumping ground for years. But the dumping ground hasn’t only been used for toxic materials as bodies have been dumped there also. But the dead are beginning to rise and forces a brother and sister out for a jog to team up with a couple criminals to survive the onslaught of zombies that are attacking. The group tries to use their cars to escape but that makes little difference as the numbers of undead begin to rise. Another independent zombie film that doesn’t exactly separate itself from the growing number of other Indy zombie films out there. They all have ‘good concepts’ but just don’t find a way to pull it off. I give the film 1 ½ out of 4 stars and you can find more out at www.foxtrotprodfilms.com .

 

The Plague 2: Biohazard Blood (DVD) – Two survivors from the first film, Becky and Jill are roaming the wasteland as the plague spread quickly through the cities and world. The world fell apart quickly as the Love Canal incident turned into full fledge zombie apocalypse. Or the filmmaker just has watched too much of “The Walking Dead”? As Becky and Jill see signs for salvation and travel to the destination until they cross a father whose child was taken from him because they escaped the sanctuary. Becky and Jill choose to help and rescue the daughter and disband this so-called sanctuary. The sequel seem to be less bloody, boring, and a “Walking Dead” clone done very cheaply as I give it 1 out of 4 stars. You can find out more about flick at www.foxtrotprodfilms.com .

 

Les Paterson Saves the World (VHS/YouTube) – A bumbling idiot that is the Australian diplomat farts while on stage during a conference and catches another diplomat on fire. As punishment he is sent to the Middle East as a favor so he could be tortured and killed. But being a complete idiot and totally unaware he escapes and helps a Russian plot to proceed. The Russian plot is a Bio-weapon of super herpes via toilet seats being placed in the Pentagon so it could infect all Americans. The diabolical plan can only be stopped by the bumbling idiot or the U.S. president Joan Rivers to give up one squillion dollars for the antidote. The 1987 film has its moments that include Hugh Keays-Byrne in leather and Barry Humphries also starring as a woman who works for the C.I.A. trying to defuse the situation. A weird comedy that I know I didn’t get all of the humor but was just glad to watch something a little different than the usual so I give it 2 stars.

 

Rise of the Footsoldier (DVD) – The film is based on a true life tough guy named Carlton Leach who rose through the ranks of feared criminals. His main business was violence and crime during the 80s and 90s. If someone needed protected, drugs sold, guns, someone beaten up? Carlton and his boys were the ones to contact if you had the cash. Leach made a living off of this for many years until some peers of his were killed in a vicious shooting that one of his friends said they were retiring. The UK accent is very thick in this film where they should have had some subtitles at times but if you are a fan of mob flicks this might be something up your alley? I give the movie 2 stars.

 

The Sisterhood (DVD) – Another Philippines post-apocalyptic flick produced from the Roger Corman Company that is about women with special powers after the nuclear holocaust. The year is 2021 and a woman and her village have just been raided by some raiders and her brother was killed. Two women warriors from a group “The Sisterhood” come by and help the young lady. The warriors of The Sisterhood are considered outcasts or witches and decide they will help track down the raiders that did this horrible deed. The female warriors believe in freedom and will put an end to the men’s’ terror with or without the help of the war wagon they find. Quite a fun post-apocalyptic B-movie that doesn’t look like it has much going for it and for that I give it 2 stars.

 

Any comments or questions please send to grossmoviereview@verizon.netor www.facebook.com/grossmoviereviews . Remember folks always support your local independent movie theater, independent video store, and independent filmmakers! It will keep horror alive………

Don’t forget you can also hear Kyle Poling and me talking about horror flicks on a weekly basis on the Bloodbaths and Boomsticks podcast at: www.bloodbathspodcast.blogspot.com/ also available at http://www.stitcher.com/podcast/kyle-poling-2/bloodbaths-and-boomsticks?refid=stpr

 

Plus you can always go to the greatest T-shirt place online or if you are in Texas visit the store of “Fast Custom Shirts” where T-shirt Joe is the only place you should purchase your horror T-shirts: Go to www.fastcustomshirts.com for details.

 

See yinz at GROSSFEST! July 28, 2018! Go check out www.grossfest.com for all the details! 

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John Portanova’s Hunting Grounds coming this May!

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         Bigfoot returns in Hunting Grounds out this May from Uncork’d Entertainment!

 

We’ve just announced the BD and DVD release of Hunting Grounds. 

Hunting Grounds | Official Trailer


https://youtu.be/QqhId9atvjE

Info
Uncork’d Entertainment opens the HUNTING GROUNDS this May.
Winner Best Sci-Fi Horror Film at the Toronto Independent Film Festival 2015, writer-director John Portanova’s acclaimed film sees a fractured family forced to go up against an angry clan of Bigfoot.
Festival audiences and horror critics have gone crazy for the story of a father and son, forced to move to an old cabin in the woods after a devastating tragedy, who unearth a tribe of Sasquatch.
Written and directed by John Portanova and produced by horror label The October People, Hunting Grounds stars Miles Joris-Peyrafitte, Jason Vail, David Saucedo, D’Angelo Midili, and Emmy winner Bill Oberst Jr (Criminal Minds).
DVD and Blu-ray extras include Audio commentary with Writer/Director John Portanova, Producer Matt Medisch, and Director of Photography Jeremy Berg, making-of feature, deleted scenes (Blu-ray only), and  “John Goes Squatchin'” A featurette following Writer/Director John Portanova as he embarks on his first Squatchin’ trip into the Washington rainforest (Blu-ray only).

On DVD and Blu-ray May 2 2017

Episode 202 is up folks!

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This week we welcome back our bud John Portanova to talk about 2 Roger Corman killer baby flicks in THE UNBORN and THE UNBORN 2.  Also we get a treat as a very drunk Tim (A.K.A) convention Tim shows up to talk about more Roger Corman stuff in SLUMBER PARTY MASSACRE 3.  And Kyle brings a real gross out flick in the story of Ezra Cobb in DERANGED.  Also, we have Albert Puyn’s weird broken finger. 

 

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EPISODE 202

This time around we have a It’s Alive trilogy retrospective

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This week Kyle and Tim are joined by our retrospective dude and the man behind VALLEY OF THE SASQUATCH John Portanova to cover the IT’s ALIVE trilogy.  We also talk about our trip to Horrorhound Weekend in scenic Indianapolis Indiana.  Also we get into Kyle meeting noted asshole Yaphet Kotto, What we have been watching, Obscure movie tie in books, Kyle and John drop a lot of money on Severin titles, and a whole lot more.

http://www.bloodbathspodcast.blogspot.com/

EPISODE 176

Gross Movie Reviews #342

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Gross Movie Reviews #342

 

By Tim Gross

 

The Equalizer (DVD) – Denzel’s latest effort just happens to be a reboot of a cool 80s TV show. Now with that being said if it wasn’t based on the TV show or under a different title I believe a lot of people would have a different opinion on this dramatic action flick. Denzel is just an older dude that happens to work at the bootleg Lowes or Home Depot (take your pick) and helps out his fellow employees and lives alone. He also goes to the same diner in the middle of the night to read and talk to a young prostitute about the weather, his books, and the pie at the diner. One night the young woman gets into a scuffle with her Russian pimp and Denzel’s character takes offense. What does he do he goes into the Russian pimp’s territory and fucks everybody up in less than 25 seconds. From there the war is on as a hitman/clean up man/one bad ass dude comes into town to clear things up and find out about this character that just killed five guys without anybody seeing him. We are talking some awesome and radical dramatic action stuff going on here people. Put it simply for me this may have been Denzel Washington’s best film ever! I give it 4 stars.

 

Deuces Wild (DVD/YouTube) – A film that takes place during the summer of ’58 or otherwise known as “the summer of blood” where two gangs in Brooklyn are out for blood after Norman Redus gets out of jail for a three year stint. It reminds of an updated version of “The Outsiders” and a little “West Side Story” minus the singing. Where the film shows how two gangs bloodlust changes their lives forever. Cool stuff as I give it 3 stars.

 

Last House on Dead End Street (VHS/DVD) – An independent 70s film which to me at least is nowhere near as interesting as the story or stories of how it came to be. Yeah this film has some die-hard fans that will hate me for saying that but come on the shit that went on years after this film is pretty god damn interesting. Pretty much the film is about a crazy/evil dude gets out of jail and wants to make money making real snuff films. I know you have seen stuff like this before but this is the film that most likely inspired all who have done something since. Especially since the director Roger Watkins aka Victor Janos for the film didn’t even claim making the film until the year 2000. He claimed they made the film in 1972 and somehow 1977 it was unleashed onto the exploitation community where several film goers for years claimed the film to be real?! Really interesting stories behind this flick but for the most part Watkins made a fake snuff film for about $1500 and it’s pretty fucked up so prepare yourself if you never have witnessed the carnage. The film is a little boring and bizarre in parts but will blow your mind when Mrs. Palmer’s legs are being hacked off among other torture. I give it 2 stars as a movie 4 star quality for the legend and many stories behind the making of the film, people who wouldn’t claim it, and the lawsuits.

 

The Clown Murders (VHS/DVD) – I stumbled upon another 1970s film is more thriller than horror, more rich people with rich people problems, and it stars John Candy! Four friends plot to kidnap a friend’s rich wife during a Halloween party only to fuck with their friend they are jealous of. But of course when it all gets down: one dude wants to rape her, another thinks they went too far, and the other two just fights about what should happen next. Like I said rich people with rich people problems which usually equals borefest as I give it 2 stars.

 

Zombie Toxin (VHS) – A completely random, retarded, and chaotic zombie film made in the UK on the cheap… very cheap. Somehow this Tom J. Moose flick has the tagline: ‘Monty Python meets Dawn of the Dead”. I am going to go out on a limb and disagree with this statement but that didn’t stop Mr. Moose in 1998 making a flick where a scientist and his assistant unleash a zombie toxin in the water supply. Which helps jolly old England countryside turn into a zombie apocalypse that just so happens to have a bootleg Hitler looking for the formula. It’s fun for the first 15 minutes but soon turns into a chore just to finish watching the flick. I give it a ½ star.

 

The Room (DVD) – Described on the DVD box as “a quirky black comedy”. It’s been a few days and I am still waiting for the comedy. Or is the comedy when the lead character Johnny kills himself. Damn! I just gave away the movie and for good reason as I try to save you from this bad movie. Hell it wasn’t even that good of an episode of “Red Shoe Diaries” as I believe lead actress Juliette Danielle (Lisa) gets her beaver obliterated three times over in the first 15 minutes of the film and seems to be up for more, including showing her beauties at a drop of the hat when Johnny’s best friend stops by. Again even after all the nudity I still fail to see the comedy. Don’t try and explain this film to me because I don’t care and it’s all Bootleg Tim Gross’s fault that I watched it as I give it 0 stars.

 

Jug face (DVD) – Apparently Mountain rednecks believe in this dirty water hole they call “The Pit”. They pray to it, they sacrifice to it, they totally believe in it. Until the crazy family member makes a jug face of a young girl who is pregnant and doesn’t want to die. Never mind she got knocked up by her brother! But anyway she hides the jug face and other people around begin to die horribly until she tells the truth and end of the movie… literally! I give it 0 stars and still question why I watched it?

Sasquatch Poster 3b_Text_FIN_web

Valley of the Sasquatch (Vimeo/DVD) – This is the third film I have had the pleasure of checking out from writer/producer/director/all around talented filmmaker dude John Portanova. And ‘Valley’ does not disappoint folks as The October People crew as usual put together a film that relies a lot on storytelling which can be rare these days but when needed will get the bucket of blood out. A father and son head out to an old family cabin as they have fallen on real bad times. Mike believes slightly this may be a chance for his father Roger and him to reconnect but soon finds out his father has other plans for the weekend and the rest of Mike’s life. Soon Roger’s party weekend comes to a screeching stop when a possible Sasquatch or Squatches attack the hunting party. Things quickly get out of hand and Mike is unsure of how to rescue his father let alone surviving the night. Great story telling and an awesome Sasquatch costume makes this a must see in 2015 as I give Portanova and The October People crew’s flick 3 ½ out of 4 stars. You can find out more about the flick at www.theoctoberpeople.net .

the_lashman

The Lashman (YouTube/DVD) – Another independent effort from filmmaker Cameron McCasland puts together two things I like in a film: the 80s and a slasherfest. Mr. McCasland does a wonderful job of giving “The Lashman” a 80s feel with the clothes and vehicles and even characters. He also gives it that ghost story in the middle of the movie that explains the unstoppable killer trying to kill off a group of friends on a weekend of fun. But the weekend of fun, drinking, and swimming comes to an end when The Lashman is loose in the Kentuckian countryside again. The low budget effort suffers from pacing issues but the passion of making it an old school 80s flick goes a long way for me when watching movies and for that I give it 2 ½ out of 4 stars. For more details on the fun horror flashback film go to: https://www.facebook.com/lashmanmovie .

 

Any comments or questions please send to: GrossMovieReview@verizon.net, GrossMovieReview@aol.com or www.facebook.com/grossmoviereviews . Remember folks always support your local independent movie theater, independent video store, and independent filmmakers! It will keep horror alive………

You can always visit and see some past reviews, independent film news, or me ranting at: www.grossmoviereviews.com !!!

Don’t forget you can also hear Kyle Poling and me talking about horror flicks on a weekly basis on the Bloodbaths and Boomsticks podcast at: www.bloodbathspodcast.blogspot.com/

Plus you can always go to the greatest T-shirt place online or if you are in Texas visit the store of “Fast Custom Shirts” where T-shirt Joe is the only place you should purchase your horror T-shirts: Go to www.fastcustomshirts.com for details.

See yinz at Horror Realm March 6-8th, 2015 as you will find me in the “Out of Print Film Room” presented by Gross Movie Reviews. For details visit www.horrorrealmcon.com .

And do not forget to order your copy of Gross Movie Reviews: The Wrath of Gross at: http://www.lulu.com/shop/tim-gross/gross-movie-reviews-the-wrath-of-gross/paperback/product-21975934.html

Episode 151 and 152 are up for listening pleasures

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episode 151

This week we welcome back JOHN PORTANOVA to the show. We will be talking about his new film VALLEY OF THE SASQUATCH.  And we will also be laughing and discussing our way through 3 more genre movies including THE SENDER, CUT AND RUN, and HARDWARE.  So, if you like Sasquatch and or Bigfoot, pervy midget neighbors, aqua Michael Berryman, or killer robots.  This show is for you.

http://www.bloodbathspodcast.blogspot.com/

 episode 152

So, while rooting around my computer I stumbled across this artifact recorded last Christmas. What was once lost is now found.  Here we check out ELVES with Dan Haggerty, DEATH WARRANT, with Van Damme, and THE BABADOOK! We also answer all your listener questions and review our watches of the week.  ENJOY!

http://www.bloodbathspodcast.blogspot.com/

 

Valley of the Sasquatch… it’s coming!

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Sasquatch Poster 3b_Text_FIN_web

 

Check out independent filmmaker’s John Portanova’s latest effort:

John Portanova Writer/Director “Valley of the Sasquatch” facebook.com/valleyofthesasquatch twitter.com/sasquatchhorror

IMDB page: http://www.imdb.com/title/tt3231390/reference

Stuck in Snowmageddon? Gear up, because Kyle finally found the Critters episode!

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As Kyle was editing last week’s episode he stumbled across a mystery Mp3 file.  That file was the complete “lost” critters retrospective that we got together with our retrospective guy John Portanova to do months ago.  So here it is in its entirety.  WE’VE COME FOR THE CRITES!!

 critters

 

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