Yes people we are lazy and Grossfest is this Saturday but we do have five new episodes for you!

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This time around Tim, Kyle, and John take on 3 more flicks.  The first being the biggest movie Hollywood has ever put out in AVENGERS: ENDGAME.  Then we tackle on of the most amazing independent movies we have ever seen in THE HEAD HUNTER.  And finally a classic that Kyle has never seen in THE HAZING.  So download this come see us at GROSFEST this Saturday.

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This time around we tackle 3 finer genre flicks.  The first being the 3rd in the action packed trilogy in JOHN WICK: PARABELLUM.  Then we got an offbeat aquatic slasher in AMSTERDAMNED.  And lastly Jamie Lee Curtis shoots some dudes in BLUE STEEL.  So download this episode and join us at GROSSFEST this Saturday.

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This time around we are covering 4 more genre flicks.  The first being a sequel to one of the most infamous movie of all time in I SPIT ON YOUR GRAVE: DEJA VU.  And then we are on to an Argento giallo in FOUR FLIES ON GREY VELVET.  Then it’s a weirdo French art flick featuring an outer space fuck octopus in POSSESSION.  And lastly we have the king of the monsters in GODZILLA 2019.  So join us at GROSSFEST this Saturday and have some fun.  BRING BEER!!

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On this week show we pay tribute to the greatest football player of all time and one of the best genre actors we’ve ever had… JIM BROWN!  First we watch an all-time classic that Kyle has never seen in THE DIRTY DOZEN.  Then it’s off to a great slick of Blaxploitation in SLAUGHTER.  And finally we have Jim teaming up with Lee Van Cleef in EL CONDOR.  So download this show and join us at GROSSEFEST this Saturday.

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This week around we bring you 3 more flicks from the back alleys of the internet.  First (much to Kyle’s chagrin) we have a weirdo DAN HAGGERTY joint in MIND TRAP.  Then we cover a SHUDDER joint from Australia in 100 BLOODY ACRES.  And lastly we chat about the newest Netflix jam in THE PERFECTION.  So listen to this epic show and join us at GROSSFEST this Saturday.

 

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Gross Movie Reviews #473

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Gross Movie Reviews #473

 

The Nun (DVD) – “The Conjuring” series continues as they did a prequel or more of an origin story for that scary ass nun that scares the nutsacks out of the Warrens. It is set in 1952 where a sect, group, whatever you wanna call them of nuns hang out in this remote castle called the Abbey outside of a small Romanian town. However these quiet young ladies have been keeping an evil secret hidden away from the Vatican and the world. After a young man who delivers food to the Abbey finds a bloody ass nun hung herself he thought he should get word to the right people. So the Vatican sends a priest with a mysterious past and a nun who has yet to take her vows to the Abbey and investigate the suicide. And see if the rumors are true about something evil living there? Once there they both understand quickly this evil is real and must be dealt with in a hurry as its power is beginning to grow. But no matter what happens we all know from the past films with the Warrens the ‘nun’ is still doing some ghostly shit so in the end what was the point of the film? For that I give a meh and 2 stars.

Empire of Ash (YouTube) – Been a little while since I touched on my second favorite genre “post-apocalyptic films”, so I thought it was time to tackle this Canadian thriller from 1988. If I got the backstory right it was supposedly filmed in 1986 then got rereleased in 1988 as “Empire of Ash II” in case you cannot find one, which is why. For another weird fact it was also retitled in some countries as “Maniac Warriors”, no wonder it took me a while to track this lower budgeted crap down. So the apocalypse happened and there are some survivors. Problem there is a crazy ass priest with his band of post-apocalyptic misfits killing survivors who are not down with the new god in ‘New Idaho’. A woman warrior (Danielle) and a weird bootleg of a bootleg loner warrior team up, bump uglies, and try to save the one’s sister. If that wasn’t enough plot for you on the other side of ‘New Idaho’ there is some generic scientists using some survival weirdos of kidnapping fresh victims, I mean survivors to use for their possible cure. In the end a lot of random filler and a hot young lady warrior 80s style fucking shit up but not enough for me to recommend yinz going down the same path of finding this as I give it 1 ½ stars.

Empire of Ash III (YouTube) – Yes for the love of Rutger Hauer it had a sequel and I watched it. Released in 1989 it still follows the same female warrior (Danielle) who lost her man, her sister, and really doesn’t seem to care… Supposedly its 2050 and William Smith playing the new bad ass nutzoid priest is out fucking people up in ‘New Idaho’. Danielle after getting naked decides to help a young man rescue his teenage love from William Smith before he boinks her for god! There was little recasting from the first movie as you see a lot of the same people in this sequel but most likely someone got fired to pay for William Smith as he wasn’t doing high profile projects any longer. Best thing I can say about this besides Danielle and William Smith is there are cannibals and for that I give 2 stars. And before I forget this movie was also retitled “Last of the Warriors” at one time.

 

Pro-Wrestlers vs. Zombies (Blu-ray) – Okay people I really wanted to like this movie but man this was disappointing folks. The film stars Shane Douglas as himself. Douglas has a feud with another wrestler Billy that gets ugly quick over a woman. Douglas ‘accidentally’ kills this wrestler Billy in the ring. Billy’s Brother Angus in order to get revenge he must sacrifice a nurse to begin his zombie horde, and pay a promoter to set up a private wrestling event at an empty West Virginia prison. A bus takes the wrestlers (Douglas, Roddy Piper, Hacksaw Jim Duggan, Matt Hardy, and a few others) along with valets to the prison. Oh before I forget Kurt Angle makes a cameo through the side door that even seems out of place for this film? Now they all must fight through the hordes of zombies because Douglas and this now dead wrestler Billy could get along. Damn that is really playing a wrestling angle… too bad it is pretty boring. It has a little bit of gore and tons of extras but Piper has little to work with to help this feature along as maybe the film idea should have stayed dead as I give it 1 star.

 

John Wick Chapter 3: Parabellum (Theater) – Holy fuck nuts the action does not stop in this wonderful film. If you are looking for story or closure into the John Wick storyline you won’t find it here. But if you are looking for some of the best action sequences ever for a US film and wanna see John Wick kill hundreds, Mark Dacascos be one of my favorite villains and enjoy his work, Halle Berry have dick-chomping dogs, and be introduced to some bad ass action dudes you may have not had the pleasure watching in other films like I have? Check your brain at the door and allow your mind to be action fucked by this great film. The movie has flaws if you sit back and have been studying the storyline of the franchise as my podcast partners John Shatzer, Kyle Poling, and I did on our podcast Bloodbaths and Boomsticks. Imagery is top notch but somewhere behind all that the writers may have forgotten what makes this run? Either way people I don’t care as I was entertained as hell as I give it 3 ½ stars.

 

Cold Steel (VHS/YouTube) – Jonathan Banks who plays Isaac the Iceman in this direct-to-video thriller wants revenge against Johnny Modine no relation to Matthew Modine. Johnny and Isaac were young cops who were close buddies partying until they got into a scuffle they couldn’t handle in an alley way behind the bar. Johnny got knocked out; Isaac got his throat and face slashed, and their buddy died. Besides killing Johnny’s father on Christmas Eve night he uses a young Sharon Stone to lure Johnny’s trust and let his guard down so The Iceman can play with him before his revenge. Maybe not the best of thrillers but you have amazing car stunts, Jonathan Banks who has always played a great bad guy, Adam Ant as a meth dealer, and Sharon Stone naked, I am in to watch this again as I give it 2 ½ stars.

 

Possession (DVD) – Well this 1981 film was one fucking weird movie folks. Mark and Anna are having marriage troubles. Mark was away for a long time with his government job only to come home and spend some quality family time and find out his wife Anna is not just fucking another dude… But she apparently gave birth to some weird gooey thing in the subway tunnel that she has sex with and you are supposed to decide if its: God, the devil, or just Mark’s clone for some weird unknown reason? When you think the film gets strange and blows past that and just get downright confusing as Anna has an apartment away from Mark and her boyfriend so she can take care of this thing. Which she must kill to feed it by the way but Mark doesn’t understand until the very end when Anna regrets it when they both die. Isabelle Adjani and Sam Neill were fucking amazing in way into the roles but I still don’t quite know what I watched in this gooey mystery as I give it 2 stars.

 

Any comments please send to grossmoviereview@verizon.net or www.facebook.com/grossmoviereviews . Remember folks always support your local independent movie theater, independent video store, and independent filmmakers! It will keep horror alive………

Don’t forget you can also hear Kyle Poling, John Shatzer, and me talking about horror flicks on the Bloodbaths and Boomsticks podcast at: www.bloodbathspodcast.blogspot.com .

Plus you can always go to the greatest T-shirt place online or if you are in Texas visit the store of “Fast Custom Shirts” where T-shirt Joe is the only place you should purchase your horror T-shirts: Go to www.fastcustomshirts.com and support!

Grossfest 2 is coming… July 20, 2019, check our Grossfest Facebook page and www.grossfest.com for details. #grossfest #grossfest2019

 

No Rondos… But we do have four new shows for you!

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We have been gone for almost a month but we’re back!  Due to Kyle’s job being shut down for some time due to a tornado almost destroying the place that sends us supplies to operate and our audio hosting site having technical problems for the last week (Kyle suspects they are all drunk over at talkshoe.com)  we wanted to know that we are are still very much alive.  But for the time being you can stream or download the show from our site, but, they won’t be on Stitcher until the alcoholics over at talkshoe put down the bottle and get that intervention that they so very much need.  So untill that happens enjoy the 4 new episodes… cause we got god damn RONDO AWARDS to lose over here at bloodbaths and boomsticks central!
 
Thanks for listening and writing in and we will continuing to listen.  were gonna be around for a long time.

 

Kyle

This week we are dropping 4 new episodes due to our audio hosting site screwing up, and Kyle’s job has been destroyed for the time being by a tornado.  But that won’t stop us as we bring you and episode in which we talk about the return of a beloved horror series in CULT OF CHUCKY.  Aind the latest in the found footage horror in THE MONSTER PROJECT.  Also we read your questions and peruse the week that was.



(NOTE: episode 247, 248, 249, and 250 wont be streamable from our site nor on stitcher for the time being due to our audio hosting site being all jacked up.)

 

This week we are back with 2 more pieces of weirdo cinema.  The first being the cornerstone in a pretty decent franchise starring one of our favorite duded Andrew Divoff in WISHMASTER.  The second is a  strange trip of a flick directed by genre stalwart Jeff Lieberman in BLUE SUNSHINE.  Also we review the week that was, and answer your listener questions.  So download this or else your hair will fall out because of that time you dabbled in LSD in high school. 

 

 

This week we ask whe question… “WHATS IN THE BOX???” as we review 3 movies about weird mystery boxes in them (we’re really kinda running out of theme ideas here).  The first being this years movie that asks the question what if the final destination series fucked the Wishmaster series in WISH UPON.  Then we talk about a Jewish demon possession flick in THE POSSESSION.  And finally Kyle was dragged to the theater to see the latest in the saw series in JIGSAW.  Also we do the normal ramblings of news, listener questions and perusing the recent weeks viewing habits.  So download this show or Jigsaw will return from the dead for the 127th time.

This week we are celebrating thanksgiving like all the other american dullards are…. by celebrating Christmas a month early instead!  So we bring to you 2 Christmas fright flicks to  binge upon way earlier than you should.  First being this years BETTER WATCH OUT.  and the second being the remake to Bob Clarke’s all time classic in BLACK X-MAS 2006 cause Kyle says it’s awesome and everybody is wrong about it (just like  THUNDERDOME)!  We also do the normal rotation of what we watched in the last week, answer your listener questions, and get to some movie related news (Spoiler Alert, people get touched in the naughty bits).  So download this episode or that crazy grandpa from Silent Night Deadly Night will punish you!

 

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Bloodbaths and Boomsticks Double Feature!!!

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This week Kyle and Tim return to talk about Kyle watching the T.V. show Taboo.  Tim needs your votes to win an award. What we consider the greatest movie of our generation.  Convention stuff and how to survive one.  And Kyle pitches a movie where Dolph Lundgren destroys an evil corporation. Trailers, movie reviews, and a ton more bullshit.

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This week Kyle and Tim start the bullshit early by recalling all the foreign objects that Tim has brought to E.C.W. house shows.  Kyle sees Get Out, Secretly gay Disney cartoons that all the uppity soccer moms have forgotten about. And Kyle tells the story of the time he was in 6th grade and knocked the eye out of a kid with a rock.  Also, we talk about what happens when Marvel Superheroes get old and pissed off in LOGAN. And sharks get possessed by Satan and bad CGI in SHARK EXORCIST. 

www.bloodbathspodcast.blogspot.com