This week we have 3 more movies to converse about. First what happens when Johnny Depp dies, becomes sentient A.I. and downloads himself onto the internet? WORLD DOMINATION of course in TRANSCENDENCE. Then we have a true gem. It’s a violent, very Canadian version of Assault on Precinct 13 in SIEGE featuring a young Philadelphia Collins (BAMMMM!) And finally we have DEADSTREAM where a you tuber grabs a camera and films some creep stuff inside an abandoned house, but this time it does not suck (I’m looking at you Dashcam) We also cover what we have been watching, the latest news, and we answer all your listener question. So download this episode of The Mustard Tiger will lay waste to your home (Pew.pew.pew)
Sudden Death (YouTube) – My friend across the pond Philip Brocklehurst is back with another quickie film that isn’t so much horror related as serious… Love how all shot in one location and able to tell the story without a word being spoken as a lonely man sudden leaves this world and how depressing we being mere mortals can be? It’s short but shows off the filmmaker’s range and that to be effective not everything has to be a bloodbath as I give it 4 out of 4 stars.
Down and Out in Vampire Hills (Vimeo) – A hilarious and entertaining film from Craig Railsback and some Indy vets that concerns a certain Penelope Vampire Queen and her long time servant Harold. Times are rough these days as we know and Penelope and Harold who are already living out of tents are now being evicted from those. If that wasn’t enough thy have lost their investment in the Crypto world and now are forced to get jobs! The two try and try but unfortunate accidents follow them to every place of employment and all the vampire queen wants is a small home for her coffin and wardrobe so she doesn’t feel cramped. The short flick is entertaining as hell as I give it 3 out 4 stars.
Like Father, Like Daughter (YouTube) – So a newer filmmaker in Ken Brewer who is mostly known for his series of short films called “Death Park” takes a stab at a feature length film. This film hits the ground running as a father and daughter duo who was sentenced to an insane asylum after their murder spree waste no time breaking out to start a new one! The two individuals find themselves at a nature park and find a group tour to torture and kill along with a few random park visitors. Throw in a couple bumbling park officers, a bunch of running around, and a kill scene that seems like every two minutes and you have yourself a slasher with two serial killers. Anyway, even with overuse of the drone, some of the dumbest victims you will see in an independent film Mr. Brewer’s flick does have a very gritty entertaining charm to it. It also has the feel of an early 90s S.O.V. film that may help sell it to a small film company if the “Halloween stingers” are lifted? This film will find its audience at independent film convention circuit more than the mainstream as I give it 2 out of 4 stars.
Siege (DVD) – This 1983 Canadian exploitation flick also known as “Self Defense” is a film I have never knew about has recently gotten the Blu-ray treatment and is a treat for fans of films like “Tenement” and “Vigilante”. This gritty ass film takes place in 1981 Halifax, Nova Scotia where the police force has just gone on strike and slowly members of the community are doing two things: Boarding themselves in at night or running amok through the streets. Which bring us to a gang white degenerates who call themselves the ‘New Order or N.O.’ and first up on their list tonight is hitting up a gay bar and I mean hitting it hard. The film wastes no time making the viewer uncomfortable but also makes sure you are in for a fun film when one of the bar patrons escape during the battle (trying not to give away the goodies of this film). The leader, Cabe, of New Order demands his degenerates to search for this disgraceful human being as they put it. The club member finds a rundown apartment building in the middle of nowhere that’s occupied by a small group of people who want to do the right thing when confronted by these degenerates. The rest of the film the tone is set as it’s a fight to the death as both sides each is picked off one by one. The film is gritty, uncomfortable, entertaining as hell and glad this got the Blu-ray treatment so people like myself have a chance to learn about this film as I give it 3 ½ stars.
Mark of the Vampire (DVD) – A 1935 Bela Lugosi flick that I thought I had seen before but hadn’t but damn glad I sat down to watch this hidden gem to me. It’s 1934 and in a small Czech village the people still believe in vampires including the coroner. Meanwhile in the castle up the hill N’at, Sir Karell is murdered and people believe its vampires except the inspector. The inspector believes its straight up murder and as he investigates let’s say there is some others planning what happens to the estate and the riches that come with it? The clever inspector sets up a trap to truly catch the murderer and solve the mystery. This is a fun one even by today’s ADD standards of movie viewers. Have a chance to check this one out? Do it as I give it 3 stars.
Messenger of Death (DVD) – I literally tripped over this Chuck Bronson 1988 thriller where he plays a Denver reporter Garret Smith who happens to be friends of the police chief and stumbles upon a massacre of a family in the mountains. Garret being the reporter he is innocently looks into the aftermath of the massacre and finds out this is a possible religious fight between two brothers who live outside the usual communities or off the grid. But when Garret and a reporter from a small nearby paper are almost killed a couple times Smith digs deeper and finds this is much bigger than anyone can believe? A fun thriller but a pooper of an ending as it just ends and leaves me wonder if it was the lack of money as this was at the end of the Cannon Group’s run in the 80s as I give this 2 ½ stars.
Deadstream (Shudder) – Shawn is an internet influencer who faces his fears and streams it. Immediately I am already annoyed this movie is gonna be dumb, lazy, and a waste of my time. But I was super wrong as Joseph Winter aka Shawn who is also a co-director and co-writer of the film plays one of the biggest douchebags in film perfectly. Shawn explains after some trouble six months back and losing all of his online sponsors he is back for one big streaming show. He is going to face his fear of ‘GHOSTS’ as he is going to explore and stay the night in a notorious haunted home called “Death Manor”. This will all stream live as Shawn goes through, set up cameras, and makes sure his fans call him out if he tries to flee the house. As Shawn sets up everything in the home he goes over the house’s paranormal history and the stories of those who died here. Shawn being the scared douchebag he is almost leaves several times from noises, etc. This is after he breaks a very important drawing in a closet and then runs into superfan Chrissy and this where this entertaining as hell horror film won me over big time as it takes another unexpected turn? Without spoiling too much the film finds a way to give you a splash of “Evil Dead”, talk cancel culture, a couple jump scares, give a wonderful hated douchebag character, and do a lot of kick ass practical effects! Not only is this one of the best horror films of 2022 this makes me look forward to what Joseph Winter and Vanessa Winter have in store next for horror fans as they rock as I give this movie 4 stars and you will hear me talking about it again at the end of the year!
V/H/S 99 (Shudder) – The anthology series is back and as usual do things their own way as little clips of army men (which were fucking hilarious) is its own story that is the wraparound of the anthology. First film, which most likely is the only weak one of the bunch is about a group of friends referred to as R.A.C.K. who grew up on MTV of the 90s decide to enter an old burned out punk venue to practice their music only to awaken the all-girl dead band ‘Bitchkat’. This first entry felt like they tried way too hard but moving on to the second entry as they use the bootleg “Shrieker” monster from Charles Band in a segment where sorority girls take a pledge to a mortuary and convince her she needs to spend the night in a coffin. Third segment is about a game show called ‘Ozzy’s Dungeon’ that a flashback of the old Nickelodeon game shows of the 90s but in this one no one wins but a parent decides to take it next level when her child gets hurt. Fourth segment has teenage boys spying on the neighbor after one of them help her set up her webcam and this is where the army guy segment leads into. But it’s all fun for them to see her naked until she is able to turn and twist her body in weird ways and she comes to visit them. Last but not least is a segment where two guys get sucked into another dimension or hell after being a part of a séance with a coven on New Year’s Eve of 1999. The two must fight off evil forces and find their way back and also as I just reviewed “Deadstream” this segment came from Joseph and Vanessa Winter. These two are gonna be people yinz horror fans are gonna wanna pay attention too. This entry of V/H/S was fun but felt a little long as I believe the first entry is what holds this movie back from being one of the best horror films of 2022… I still give this solid horror film 3 stars because all the other stuff in it was great, just wished they did something else with the R.A.C.K. group?
Croc! (DVD) – An UK film with a big killer crocodile which I didn’t know there was crocodiles in the UK but that could be I am just an ignorant bastard. We got bootleg Aquaman banging a hot tattooed woman to start the film off, a young couple about to get married in the countryside with friends, and an angry crocodile eating people not more than five minutes in and that’s where the movie just goes downhill. What should have been a hilarious and fun take on ‘killer croc’ films turns into a boring, poorly acted, and disgusting computer croc effects (really, you CGI’d the fucking croc in a barn and to walk the wedding aisle). This piss poor attempt at a killer croc film should be buried in a swamp somewhere and never unearthed again as I give it 0 stars as for the love of Rutger Hauer you had bootleg Aquaman and didn’t even know how to use that character!
Terror Train (Tubi/remake again) – For those horror fans that have short memories or no life like me this is the second remake of the Jamie Lee Curtis 1980 film. Just like the original a pledge for a fraternity Kenny is being screwed with by frat brothers and the prank goes wrong as he is sent to the nuthouse. Three years later, the group of friends who did the prank is jumping on a train for a Halloween party for a night of bad decisions or great ones depending how you look at it. Unbeknownst to the party Kenny is back and the bodies are piling up as the killer takes the victim’s costume to lure other victims in. This version sticks more to the original than the 2008 remake but the real problem isn’t that this a bad film as much more of an uninspired horror film. This will find an audience in young under 21 horror fans most likely but overall this horror film felt like it was just going through the motions not good, not bad, just there as I give the film 1 ½ stars.
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