Pandemonium (Blu-ray) – So this 1983 horror spoof finally found its way on Blu-ray in the past year or so and always thought it might be a lost film as I remember watching this about the age nine or ten on HBO and it was gone. The disc comes with a twenty minute interview with the filmmaker explaining how the film came to be and how there was so many people just starting their careers in the film. A hilarious plot involving the reopening of a cheerleader camp that had been closed down for years because it had various murders happen. Bambi who twenty years ago didn’t get the chance to be on the cheerleading squad now has the chance to teach top cheerleaders how to be better. Bambi wants to make the camp a success no matter if there is an escaped convict and someone that escaped the asylum on the run. Bad jokes throughout that may not work now but the highlight is Paul Reubens interacting with a horse who is part of the Royal Canadian Mounties, hilarious nostalgia worth checking out again as I give it 3 stars.
Predator: Badlands (Blu-ray) – A young Predator who is saved by his brother because he is the runt of the litter is believed he should just be killed escapes his home planet to go prove himself. The hunt is how the predators prove themselves to their elders so the runt has chosen the great Kalisk that happens to be an unkillable beast. The death planet that the Kalisk lives on is a planet that pretty much is trying to kill you at every turn and this is where the young predator discovers a synth missing its legs but willing to help. Weyland-Yutani Corp is there to capture the Kalisk for its regenerating factors and bring back to the corporation if possible. This wasn’t the Predator film I was looking for but it was entertaining in some of Easter eggs they leave for fans and really including Weyland-Yutani into the storyline which makes me believe this is all to set up something else for future films as I give it 2 ½ stars.
The Beast of Walton St. (Tubi) – Small town homeless population is disappearing for mysterious reasons as the film starts off strong to establish what exactly is going on but fizzles quickly. Two young squatters at a garage encounter an oversized creature one night in an alley near a large dumpster. Curious, they investigate for the two young women to have a werewolf track them down to be its next meal. Again starts strong but felt it lost its way as it was trying to tell two stories that really didn’t mesh in the end as I can only give it 2 out of 4 stars.
There’s Snowed Escape (Tubi) – During a weekend of partying at a cabin to celebrate an engagement the newly soon to be married couple goes to a well to make a wish. Instead they accidentally resurrect a legendary killer in the form of a snowman called “Cold-hearted Cliff” who carries an ax. Sounds fun but it is far from being “Jack Frost”, the film has lots of flaws but has enough fun moments to be worth a watch as I give it 2 out of 4 stars.
Smashquatch (Tubi) – The rainbow mountain area became famous in the 70s for its Sasquatch sightings and a famous baseball player’s son running into the woods after his famous father lost his marbles. With all that being said you really get a large man wearing a gorilla mask killing people with a barb wire baseball bat. Honestly with a few adjustments this project could have been a fun watch? But from beginning to end the movie just feels and looks like a mess as I can only give it 1 out of 4 stars.
The Wildman Massacre (Tubi) – This is a dramatic story of a father and daughter out hunting together and come across a creature they haven’t ever seen before. They blink and the daughter shoots the thing. This changes everything after they search for the creature and find it. They both decide to just bury it but there were others and they come to kidnap Dana. This leaves Larry searching all night and stumbles upon four hunters who sort of want to help. Problem is Larry may have gotten his daughter back but he led those hunters to their deaths along the way. This was more dramatic storytelling than horror for the Bigfoot fans out there but definitely worth checking out as I give it 2 ½ out of 4 stars.
Slaughterhouse 2: Death Metal (Tubi) – Honestly didn’t see this coming… Yes, yes I have seen ‘Mutilator 2’ and hopefully they never release that unless they do some heavy reshoots and editing? So the same guy that did the first one says “fuck it” and makes the sequel almost 40 years later while not just directing connecting it to the original but also bringing back some characters. Buddy Bacon’s brother Cleavon left long ago to find his own way and he did as he also has a son who doesn’t speak much and fancies to murder. But Cleavon’s son does it to make their ‘Wonder Jerky’! People get suspicious though when several people go missing near Cleavon’s automotive yard. The original has a small following and most likely will be surprised by this sequel good and bad. For me this was just such an odd choice as if anything I am surprised a Blumhouse or A24 studio didn’t remake this smaller horror flick from 1986 as I give it 2 stars.
Gator Lake (Tubi) – The film also goes under the title ‘Lake Jesup: Bonecrusher’s Revenge’ which is based on true events of gators taking over a lake for 13 days in 2003. An ex-con Bubba has been employed by the mayor to go gator hunting as a large gator has not just chased other gators out of the area but has taken to eating certain individuals. Bubba’s theory is the large gator nicknamed ‘Bonecrusher’ is targeting people who have wronged their species over the past few decades and he knows who is at the top of that food chain. This is a prime example of fun B-movie animal attacks stuff that would have had a great response to being premiered on a SyFy Channel a few years back but now this fun cheesy stuff gets lost in the shuffle of streaming crap as I give it a solid 2 ½ stars.
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