Author Archives: grossmoviereviews

Gross Movie Reviews #342

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Gross Movie Reviews #342

 

By Tim Gross

 

The Equalizer (DVD) – Denzel’s latest effort just happens to be a reboot of a cool 80s TV show. Now with that being said if it wasn’t based on the TV show or under a different title I believe a lot of people would have a different opinion on this dramatic action flick. Denzel is just an older dude that happens to work at the bootleg Lowes or Home Depot (take your pick) and helps out his fellow employees and lives alone. He also goes to the same diner in the middle of the night to read and talk to a young prostitute about the weather, his books, and the pie at the diner. One night the young woman gets into a scuffle with her Russian pimp and Denzel’s character takes offense. What does he do he goes into the Russian pimp’s territory and fucks everybody up in less than 25 seconds. From there the war is on as a hitman/clean up man/one bad ass dude comes into town to clear things up and find out about this character that just killed five guys without anybody seeing him. We are talking some awesome and radical dramatic action stuff going on here people. Put it simply for me this may have been Denzel Washington’s best film ever! I give it 4 stars.

 

Deuces Wild (DVD/YouTube) – A film that takes place during the summer of ’58 or otherwise known as “the summer of blood” where two gangs in Brooklyn are out for blood after Norman Redus gets out of jail for a three year stint. It reminds of an updated version of “The Outsiders” and a little “West Side Story” minus the singing. Where the film shows how two gangs bloodlust changes their lives forever. Cool stuff as I give it 3 stars.

 

Last House on Dead End Street (VHS/DVD) – An independent 70s film which to me at least is nowhere near as interesting as the story or stories of how it came to be. Yeah this film has some die-hard fans that will hate me for saying that but come on the shit that went on years after this film is pretty god damn interesting. Pretty much the film is about a crazy/evil dude gets out of jail and wants to make money making real snuff films. I know you have seen stuff like this before but this is the film that most likely inspired all who have done something since. Especially since the director Roger Watkins aka Victor Janos for the film didn’t even claim making the film until the year 2000. He claimed they made the film in 1972 and somehow 1977 it was unleashed onto the exploitation community where several film goers for years claimed the film to be real?! Really interesting stories behind this flick but for the most part Watkins made a fake snuff film for about $1500 and it’s pretty fucked up so prepare yourself if you never have witnessed the carnage. The film is a little boring and bizarre in parts but will blow your mind when Mrs. Palmer’s legs are being hacked off among other torture. I give it 2 stars as a movie 4 star quality for the legend and many stories behind the making of the film, people who wouldn’t claim it, and the lawsuits.

 

The Clown Murders (VHS/DVD) – I stumbled upon another 1970s film is more thriller than horror, more rich people with rich people problems, and it stars John Candy! Four friends plot to kidnap a friend’s rich wife during a Halloween party only to fuck with their friend they are jealous of. But of course when it all gets down: one dude wants to rape her, another thinks they went too far, and the other two just fights about what should happen next. Like I said rich people with rich people problems which usually equals borefest as I give it 2 stars.

 

Zombie Toxin (VHS) – A completely random, retarded, and chaotic zombie film made in the UK on the cheap… very cheap. Somehow this Tom J. Moose flick has the tagline: ‘Monty Python meets Dawn of the Dead”. I am going to go out on a limb and disagree with this statement but that didn’t stop Mr. Moose in 1998 making a flick where a scientist and his assistant unleash a zombie toxin in the water supply. Which helps jolly old England countryside turn into a zombie apocalypse that just so happens to have a bootleg Hitler looking for the formula. It’s fun for the first 15 minutes but soon turns into a chore just to finish watching the flick. I give it a ½ star.

 

The Room (DVD) – Described on the DVD box as “a quirky black comedy”. It’s been a few days and I am still waiting for the comedy. Or is the comedy when the lead character Johnny kills himself. Damn! I just gave away the movie and for good reason as I try to save you from this bad movie. Hell it wasn’t even that good of an episode of “Red Shoe Diaries” as I believe lead actress Juliette Danielle (Lisa) gets her beaver obliterated three times over in the first 15 minutes of the film and seems to be up for more, including showing her beauties at a drop of the hat when Johnny’s best friend stops by. Again even after all the nudity I still fail to see the comedy. Don’t try and explain this film to me because I don’t care and it’s all Bootleg Tim Gross’s fault that I watched it as I give it 0 stars.

 

Jug face (DVD) – Apparently Mountain rednecks believe in this dirty water hole they call “The Pit”. They pray to it, they sacrifice to it, they totally believe in it. Until the crazy family member makes a jug face of a young girl who is pregnant and doesn’t want to die. Never mind she got knocked up by her brother! But anyway she hides the jug face and other people around begin to die horribly until she tells the truth and end of the movie… literally! I give it 0 stars and still question why I watched it?

Sasquatch Poster 3b_Text_FIN_web

Valley of the Sasquatch (Vimeo/DVD) – This is the third film I have had the pleasure of checking out from writer/producer/director/all around talented filmmaker dude John Portanova. And ‘Valley’ does not disappoint folks as The October People crew as usual put together a film that relies a lot on storytelling which can be rare these days but when needed will get the bucket of blood out. A father and son head out to an old family cabin as they have fallen on real bad times. Mike believes slightly this may be a chance for his father Roger and him to reconnect but soon finds out his father has other plans for the weekend and the rest of Mike’s life. Soon Roger’s party weekend comes to a screeching stop when a possible Sasquatch or Squatches attack the hunting party. Things quickly get out of hand and Mike is unsure of how to rescue his father let alone surviving the night. Great story telling and an awesome Sasquatch costume makes this a must see in 2015 as I give Portanova and The October People crew’s flick 3 ½ out of 4 stars. You can find out more about the flick at www.theoctoberpeople.net .

the_lashman

The Lashman (YouTube/DVD) – Another independent effort from filmmaker Cameron McCasland puts together two things I like in a film: the 80s and a slasherfest. Mr. McCasland does a wonderful job of giving “The Lashman” a 80s feel with the clothes and vehicles and even characters. He also gives it that ghost story in the middle of the movie that explains the unstoppable killer trying to kill off a group of friends on a weekend of fun. But the weekend of fun, drinking, and swimming comes to an end when The Lashman is loose in the Kentuckian countryside again. The low budget effort suffers from pacing issues but the passion of making it an old school 80s flick goes a long way for me when watching movies and for that I give it 2 ½ out of 4 stars. For more details on the fun horror flashback film go to: https://www.facebook.com/lashmanmovie .

 

Any comments or questions please send to: GrossMovieReview@verizon.net, GrossMovieReview@aol.com or www.facebook.com/grossmoviereviews . Remember folks always support your local independent movie theater, independent video store, and independent filmmakers! It will keep horror alive………

You can always visit and see some past reviews, independent film news, or me ranting at: www.grossmoviereviews.com !!!

Don’t forget you can also hear Kyle Poling and me talking about horror flicks on a weekly basis on the Bloodbaths and Boomsticks podcast at: www.bloodbathspodcast.blogspot.com/

Plus you can always go to the greatest T-shirt place online or if you are in Texas visit the store of “Fast Custom Shirts” where T-shirt Joe is the only place you should purchase your horror T-shirts: Go to www.fastcustomshirts.com for details.

See yinz at Horror Realm March 6-8th, 2015 as you will find me in the “Out of Print Film Room” presented by Gross Movie Reviews. For details visit www.horrorrealmcon.com .

And do not forget to order your copy of Gross Movie Reviews: The Wrath of Gross at: http://www.lulu.com/shop/tim-gross/gross-movie-reviews-the-wrath-of-gross/paperback/product-21975934.html

The independent film “Hate Crime” has been banned in the UK!

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Thanks to http://www.jamescullenbressack.com for the article:

 

Monday 2nd March 2015 – THE BBFC announced today that HATE CRIME, the first release in a new joint VOD venture between geek blog Nerdly.co.uk and TheHorrorShow.TV – has officially been banned in the UK. It is one of only four horror movies officially refused classification by the BBFC since 2009, the others being Grotesque, The Bunny Game and The Human Centipede 2, later released with nearly 3 minutes of cuts.

Hate Crime

Set to be the first release under the new Nerdly Presents banner, HATE CRIME tells the story of a Jewish family, having just arrived in a new neighbourhood, who are recording their youngest son’s birthday celebrations on video when their home is suddenly invaded by a bunch of crystal-meth-crazed neo-Nazi lunatics.

 

The film is the second feature from director James Cullen Bressack (To Jennifer, Blood Lake, 13/13/13), and has already had a successful release in the US, reviewed favourably by the likes of Bloody Disgusting, MoreHorror and even the UK’s very own Starburst Magazine.

 

The full official statement from the BBFC:

 

“HATE CRIME focuses on the terrorisation, mutilation, physical and sexual abuse and murder of the members of a Jewish family by the Neo Nazi thugs who invade their home. The physical and sexual abuse and violence are accompanied by constant strong verbal racist abuse. Little context is provided for the violence beyond an on screen statement at the end of the film that the two attackers who escaped were subsequently apprehended and that the one surviving family member was released from captivity. We have considered the attempt at the end to position the film as against hate-crime, but find it so unconvincing that it only makes matters worse.  

 

“The BBFC’s Guidelines on violence state that ‘Any depiction of sadistic or sexual violence which is likely to pose a harm risk will be subject to intervention through classification, cuts or even, as a last resort, refusal to classify. We may refuse to classify content which makes sexual or sadistic violence look appealing or acceptable […] or invites viewer complicity in sexual violence or other harmful violent activities. We are also unlikely to classify content which is so demeaning or degrading to human dignity (for example, it consists of strong abuse, torture or death without any significant mitigating factors) that it may pose a harm risk.’

 

“It is the Board’s carefully considered conclusion that the unremitting manner in which HATE CRIME focuses on physical and sexual abuse, aggravated by racist invective, means that to issue a classification to this work, even if confined to adults, would be inconsistent with the Board’s Guidelines, would risk potential harm, and would be unacceptable to broad public opinion.”

“Of course, the Board will always seek to deal with such concerns by means of cuts or other modifications when this is a feasible option.  However, under the heading of ‘Refusal to classify’ our Guidelines state that ‘As a last resort, the BBFC may refuse to classify a work, in line with the objective of preventing non-trivial harm risks to potential viewers and, through their behaviour, to society. We may do so, for example, where a central concept of the work is unacceptable, such as a sustained focus on sexual or sadistic violence. Before refusing classification we will consider whether the problems could be adequately addressed through intervention such as cuts.’ The Board considered whether its concerns could be dealt with through cuts. However, given that the fact that unacceptable content runs throughout the work, cuts are not a viable option in this case and the work is therefore refused a classification.”

 

Says director James Cullen Bressack: “I am honoured to know that my mind is officially too twisted for the UK. So it goes … I find it unbelievable that a film that shows little to no on screen violence and no nudity was actually banned. it just shows the power of what is implied and peoples imagination; and is a testament to the fact that the same crimes that happen in the world are truly horrifying.”

 

Nerdly.co.uk‘s Phil Wheat adds: “HATE CRIME was always going to be a contentious title to submit to the BBFC, especially given recent racial tensions. But as part of Nerdly Presents’ remit to uncover great underground movies it was worth taking the gamble on James Cullen Bressack’s movie. After all, horror is often about pushing boundaries and making your audience uncomfortable. HATE CRIME does that by throwing political correctness out of the window to create a raw, emotive and disturbing film that is a tour-de-force in reality filmmaking, taking the found-footage genre to a whole new level – asking questions of both the filmmakers and the audience. As such it’s definitely worth championing.”

 

TheHorrorShow.TV’s Jack Bowyer said: “Although it may surprise some people, TheHorrorShow.TV supports classification over censorship, as we would hate for any of our growing number of films to be viewed by an inappropriate audience. We work in collaboration with the British Board of Film Classification to ensure that our content is appropriately rated, but sometimes you need to test boundaries to find out where they are. In the case of HATE CRIME, it appears that the BBFC has deemed the content inappropriate for people of any age, even adults, and regrettably we will be unable to bring the film to the UK as part of our very exciting collaboration with Nerdly.”

Episode 151 and 152 are up for listening pleasures

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episode 151

This week we welcome back JOHN PORTANOVA to the show. We will be talking about his new film VALLEY OF THE SASQUATCH.  And we will also be laughing and discussing our way through 3 more genre movies including THE SENDER, CUT AND RUN, and HARDWARE.  So, if you like Sasquatch and or Bigfoot, pervy midget neighbors, aqua Michael Berryman, or killer robots.  This show is for you.

http://www.bloodbathspodcast.blogspot.com/

 episode 152

So, while rooting around my computer I stumbled across this artifact recorded last Christmas. What was once lost is now found.  Here we check out ELVES with Dan Haggerty, DEATH WARRANT, with Van Damme, and THE BABADOOK! We also answer all your listener questions and review our watches of the week.  ENJOY!

http://www.bloodbathspodcast.blogspot.com/

 

Valley of the Sasquatch… it’s coming!

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Sasquatch Poster 3b_Text_FIN_web

 

Check out independent filmmaker’s John Portanova’s latest effort:

John Portanova Writer/Director “Valley of the Sasquatch” facebook.com/valleyofthesasquatch twitter.com/sasquatchhorror

IMDB page: http://www.imdb.com/title/tt3231390/reference

The Wrath of Gross book makes its first public appearance

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http://www.lulu.com/shop/tim-gross/gross-movie-reviews-the-wrath-of-gross/paperback/product-21975934.html

Come find me in the film room kids as my new book makes its first public appearance and I will have copies for sale!

http://www.horrorrealmcon.com for details of this fun event

https://www.facebook.com/events/1463268877265553

https://www.facebook.com/HorrorRealmCon

HR spring 2015

Wrath of Gross color

Check out the independent feature “Croaker” now on Amazon!

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Croaker is a throwback to the drive-in movies of the 60’s and 70’s. Campy characters, humor and a monster reminiscent of a time when scary movies were just plain fun! Florian Sirko and his one-time love, Macy Patterson face a problem. A curse was cast spawning a mythological creature, the Vodnik. This curse now plagues the Sirko family and the citizens of his town are paying with their souls.

http://www.amazon.com/Croaker-Fred-Terling/dp/B00U124TFE/ref=sr_1_8?ie=UTF8&qid=1424953149&sr=8-8&keywords=Croaker

Croaker

Gross Movie Reviews #341

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Gross Movie Reviews #341

 

By Tim Gross

 

The Deadly Spawn (DVD/YouTube) – Oh one of the first low budget films that Bruce Lentz of Incredibly Strange Video introduce me too… Great stuff as some cool looking aliens land on earth and make their new home in the basement of a house where there is lots people to feast on. The film was made on a mere $25,000 budget and sports some wicked ass creature and gore effects that more than gives any horror fan a reason to watch at least once! A great creature feature that should get more love than it has as I give it 3 ½ stars.

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The Mothertown (DVD/YouTube) – A first time effort from independent UK filmmaker John Williams who apparently is giving all the proceeds from the movie to local charities in the UK which is pretty cool… But anyway two security guys find a weird naked dude in the gym shower and from there the zombie apocalypse begins! The film focuses on several groups of people who are not only trying to survive the zombie apocalypse but entertain themselves. The film also sports possibly one of the funniest scenes in a zombie apocalypse film where two men who are taking part in an S+M thing are left tied up and forced to chat as their slave master has left them for work. The film keeps cutting back in on these two and it gets funnier every time it does. There is an enormous amount of zombie extras and a gory zombie wedding scene which gives the film that cool zombie apocalypse feel. But what hurts the film and stops the story in its tracks of being interesting is when these groups of people find themselves being held by two so-called military personal waiting for their ride to leave the town before its destroyed by a nuclear attack. Williams does a great job of building a fun zombie film but shows the growing pains of what it takes to try to pull it off. I really enjoyed seeing all the extras and enjoyed the film just wish the last quarter of the film would have been edited more. I give the overseas independent effort 2 out of 4 stars and more information about the film can be found at: https://www.facebook.com/themothertown .

 

Vengeance of the Dead (VHS) – Another Full Moon movie I can cross off the list as I pull a flick out of my basement to check out… With this 2001 effort a character named Eric comes home and is haunted by a ghost named Julia. Not a whole lot happens in this flick as the film really doesn’t go anywhere interesting. I have seen better and have seen worse but you wanna be bored this is your movie to watch. I give the flick 1 star.

 

Rabid (DVD) – Another David Croenberg classic from the mid-70s, that stars the beautiful and talented actress Marilyn Chambers. Rose and her boyfriend are riding their motorcycle out in the country land outside of Montreal only to get into a horrible accident. Rose and her boyfriend get help from a plastic surgery center nearby where Rose will need several skin grafts. Rose receives several experimental skin grafts that heal quickly but Rose awakens from her coma in a crazy state not understanding her hunger until her armpit begins sucking blood out of a man’s neck. Soon Rose helps super-rabies get out in the general population of Montreal and people are attacking anyone and everywhere with the government in dismay of how to stop the super rabies. If you are a fan of “Shivers” and not seen this flick yet? Get your ass to Amazon and buy or rent this shit as I give it 3 ½ stars. And thank you to David Croenberg for making such a bizarre but awesome horror flick.

 

Cut Throat (VHS) – Keep finding these forgotten Full Moon flicks that I always wanted to see but never found the time to see them. This flick is about a horror film “Death Blade” where the actors and actresses are being killed on set and keeps comparing itself to “Scream” constantly. I have seen better but was entertaining enough that I stayed awake for the ending as I give it 2 stars.

 

Asylum of Terror (VHS) – A 1998 film that looks like a shot-on-video flick from 1988 that has a closed down prison/asylum become the new local haunted house where one its psycho inmates has decided to make a personal visit and slay those who enter. The horror film has some great gore throughout but suffers from pacing issues that makes the film awfully boring at times as I give the flick 1 ½ stars.

 

Flashback (VHS) – A German slasher film dubbed in English about a woman who leaves an asylum after ten years to be a French tutor for some rich kids. When the rich kids play a bad prank on her, she snaps and begins slaying everyone involved. Worth watching the flick for the mere reason for a body goes through a large chipper! I give the flick 2 stars.

 

The Graveyard (VHS) – A 1972 film about a young man David who hates cats and for good reason as his mother has tortured him for years. She blames him for her crippled hip and stopping her luxury life with the man she always loved. Once David’s wife and kid are dead he gets wants revenge on his mother. Animal lovers prepare yourself for a very uneasy opening to the film as I give the movie 2 stars.

 

Any comments or questions please send to: GrossMovieReview@verizon.net, GrossMovieReview@aol.com or www.facebook.com/grossmoviereviews . Remember folks always support your local independent movie theater, independent video store, and independent filmmakers! It will keep horror alive………

You can always visit and see some past reviews, independent film news, or me ranting at: www.grossmoviereviews.com !!!

Don’t forget you can also hear Kyle Poling and me talking about horror flicks on a weekly basis on the Bloodbaths and Boomsticks podcast at: www.bloodbathspodcast.blogspot.com/

Plus you can always go to the greatest T-shirt place online or if you are in Texas visit the store of “Fast Custom Shirts” where T-shirt Joe is the only place you should purchase your horror T-shirts: Go to www.fastcustomshirts.com for details.

See yinz at Horror Realm March 6-8th, 2015 as you will find me in the “Out of Print Film Room” presented by Gross Movie Reviews. For details visit www.horrorrealmcon.com .

And do not forget to order your copy of Gross Movie Reviews: The Wrath of Gross at: http://www.lulu.com/shop/tim-gross/gross-movie-reviews-the-wrath-of-gross/paperback/product-21975934.html

Horror Realm March 6-8th, 2015

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PLEASE NOTE OUR NEW LOCATION! Crowne Plaza Pittsburgh West Green Tree!

 www.horrorrealmcon.com

 Guests include:

 HR spring 2015

 From American Horror Story, appearing courtesy of In Person Productions:

 – Naomi Grossman (Pepper)

 – Erika Ervin (Amazon Eve)

 – Rose Siggins (Legless Suzi)

 

 Also starring:

 – Tony Todd (Candyman)

 – Derek Mears (Friday the 13th 2007)

 – Felissa Rose (Sleepaway Camp)

 – Tiffany Shepis (Tromeo & Juliet, Sharknado 2)

 – Sean Whalen (People Under the Stairs)

 – John Amplas (Martin, Day of the Dead)

 – College football Hall of Famer Major Harris (The Axeman of Henderson County)

 – Dan Kamin (Creepshow 2)

 – Bob & Bobby Cranmer, author of The Demon of Brownsville Road

 – John Ventre, UFO researcher and author who has appeared on on History Channel’s Hangar 1, Discovery Channel’s Close Encounters and PCTV’s UFOs over Pittsburgh

 – Mord McGhee, author of Murder Red Ink

 – Amy Lynn Best & Mike Watt of Happy Cloud Pictures

 – Fred & Shelby Vogel of ToeTag

 – Larry & Cindy Parmiter of Semi Charmed Productions

 

 Tickets available by clicking the link below. Prices:

 – Weekend passes are $30 through 1/31 then increase to $35 on 2/1

 – Single Day Friday or Saturday – $15

 – Two Day Saturday/Sunday – $20

 – Super Steeltown Sunday Discounted ticket – $10

 

 Discounted room rate is $105 plus 14% tax per night. To reserve your room by calling the hotel direct at 412-922-8100 or toll free at 1-800-439-4745 FREE and mentioning Horror Realm. You can also reserve online at http://www.ihg.com/crowneplaza/hotels/us/en/pittsburgh/pitgr/hoteldetail  with code HOR.

 

Horror Realm 2015 Spring Break Massacre Panel Schedule

All panels will take place in the Greenery Room.  Convention admission is required.

 

Friday:

  • 7:00pm – John Amplas
  • 8:00pm – John Ventre –  UFO Researcher and Author
  • 9:00pm – Author panel with Matt Demas and Steven Till

 

Saturday:

  • 10:30am – KSWA / Pgh Pro Wrestling Discussion
  • 11:00am – Post Mortem Press author panel – Eric Beebe, C. Bryan Brown, Jessica McHugh, Nelson W. Pyles and Jon Towers
  • 12:00pm – Felissa Rose and Tiffany Shepis
  • 12:50pm – Derek Mears
  • 1:45pm –  The Demon of Brownsville Road author panel with Bob & Bobby Cranmer
  • 2:30pm –  Tony Todd
  • 3:30pm –  American Horror Story cast panel
  • 4:30pm –  Post Mortem Press Trivia Contest
  • 5:30pm –  Author panel with Mord McGhee, Paul Nielsen and Cheryl Williams
  • 6:30pm –  Match Game with your host Mr. Schlock

 

Sunday:

  • Noon – Sean Whalen
  • 1:00pm – Zombie Squad Preparedness Panel
  • 2:00pm – Sean Whalen Actors Workshop – separate fee – details to be announced

 

Schedule subject to change at any time.

 

Gross Movie Reviews Presents: The Out of Print Room

Tim Gross has hand picked the film schedule at Horror Realm on Friday & Saturday.  And yes, it includes Spookies.  Films will be screened in the Embassy Room.

 

Friday

  • 5:00pm – “Bloodsucking Pharaohs in Pittsburgh” – A killer is loose in Pittsburgh and he is taking a body part with every kill in this unbelievably funny but bloody, low-budget flick that nobody wanted to claim too.
  • 7:00pm – “The Resurrected” – A weird movie loosely based on a H.P. Lovecraft story that just happens to star Chris Sarandon.
  • 9:05pm – “Red Christmas” – Steve Rudzinski gives fans something different every time out and may have given independent gorehounds a holiday present that will keep on giving for years to come!
  • 11:00pm – “Hard to Die” – A Jim Wynorski produced lost classic that was also known as “Sorority House Massacre 3” about three women trapped in the mall’s lingerie store.
  • 12:35am – “The Tomb” – The film is about a grave robber who steals an artifact from a tomb and sells it and now has the evil vampire (Michelle Bauer) controlling him in order to retrieve the artifact.

 

Saturday

  • 10:00am – “The Quest” – A very cool Aussie film from 1986 that blends Monster Squad, Goonies, and several other mid-80s films that were popular with the ‘E.T.’ kid!
  • 12:00pm – “Body Count” – The film is about a camping ground that is haunted by an Indian spirit that kills whoever camps there. Stars David Hess.
  • 2:00pm – “Spookies” – Two separate films mixed together that was originally titled “Twisted Souls” and has enough monsters and craziness that blows most horror fan’s minds!
  • 4:00pm – “13 Score” – In 1753 along a lake shore in western Pennsylvania, a group of inhabitants became stark raving lunatics and murdered one another for no apparent reason. 260 years later, it’s happening again.  Winner of the 2014 Horror Real Independent Film Festival Best Feature Film, Best Screenplay and Audience Choice Awards.
  • 6:00pm – “The Axeman of Henderson County” – A small town is terrorized by an axe-wielding serial killer in this campy, tongue in cheek thriller/comedy.  Featuring “Hacksaw” Jim Duggan and Major Harris.
  • 8:00pm – “Split Second” – The man, the myth, the legend Rutger Hauer is an officer of the law trying to track down an unnatural serial killer in a flooded futuristic London.
  • 10:00pm – “Curse of the Blue Lights” – An unknown low budget zombie flick from the late 80s that spent all its money on zombie make-up and none on sets and actors.
  • 12:00am – “Wild Beasts” – Another killer animal film that was not only made in Italy but involves a whole fucking zoo that has the animals going crazy because they are all on PCP.

Sunday schedule to be announced.

Episode 150 of Bloodbaths and Boomsticks podcast!

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This week Kyle and Tim welcome back Danno Klonowski of THE WAYNE GAYLE VARIETY HOUR PODCSAST to discuss the BBC television series BLACK MIRROR.  Then Tim talks about Treat Williams in an Italian crime/sharksploitation flick named NIGHT OF THE SHARKS.  And lastly KYLE watches TOURIST TRAP for the first time.  We also answer your comments and questions.  So download this episode of Ennis will get shot in the face!!!…  ZOOPITY ZOP!!!

 EPISODE 150

http://www.bloodbathspodcast.blogspot.com/

 

Gross Movie Reviews #340

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Gross Movie Reviews #340

 

By Tim Gross

 

Yor, The Hunter from the Future (DVD) – A great combo movie that somehow was able to combine “Beastmaster” and “Caveman” with some weird no budget droids. This classic from the early 80s is about a man named Yor, who doesn’t know it yet but is the savior for a future generation that has been hiding among the mountains. His people let him go as a child to live among the caveman-like humans in hopes of learning to fight for his life and be their savior. If you are like me and only knew it existed and never seen it until now then start tracking it down now you will not be disappointed. And for that I give it 3 stars.

 

Beauty Queen Butcher! (DVD) – A shot-on-video movie from 1991 directed by Jill Zurborg is actually very brilliant and not talked about much. Our story begins with a bigger girl named Phyllis who has been entered into the ‘Miss Slough Queen’ beauty queen pageant by her nemesis Muffy and company to be embarrassed. It does not help Ms. Purnish the pageant hostess hates Phyllis also. As the pageant is going down Phyllis is nervous and has her friend bring her a box of Twinkies which of course gives us the famous line borrowed from “Stand By Me” (my best friend since 6th grade, Craig Wallace) would be proud, “Chow down Lard Ass!” If that wasn’t enough torture the beauty queen and her runners-up put Phyllis’s cat in the microwave which sends Phyllis over the edge and begins killing them one by one. But with each death Phyllis rises up the ladder of ‘Miss Slough Queen’ as there has to be one every year according to Ms. Purnish… What is amazing with this low budget feature is it borders two hours in length which usually spells ‘death’ for most low budget films but in this case is unnoticed because of how much fun and entertaining the film truly is! So I thank Miss Zurborg for giving a great effort and give it 4 stars.

 

Freak (VHS) – A bad independent flick from 1999 but entertaining in its own little way. Example: the box says the story starts 25 years ago with a monstrosity! In the opening of the film it says, “Nine years ago”… Go figure, I find this shit hilarious and entertaining but anyway a mother who was some kind of recluse has a son who she hates and keeps chained up with a burlap bag over his head. One night when she throws her newborn in a barrel fire, the son bashes her head in. Present time/1999, two sisters moving to a new home across several states come in contact with the monstrosity when he escapes a van owned by the asylum that housed him. Sounds better than it was but what the hell you only live once so go ahead and watch it? I did! I give it 1 star.

 

Repo Jake (VHS/DVD-R/YouTube) – 1990… Dan Haggerty aka Grizzly Adams… and he is a Repo dude! If this shit had evil Nazi elves I would been going to bed with aluminum foil on my head knowing someone is tapping my brain for movie ideas? Jake is new in town and has just gotten a job at K+K Repo. He meets a nice young lady trying to be an actress, makes friends at the repo joint, is introduce to slam track racing, and just happens to repossess everything that includes helicopters. Yep mother fucking Grizzly Adams is a chopper pilot. This is the type of bad b-action shit I live for. I give it 3 stars.

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Chrysalis (DVD/Vimeo) – The film is being released under a different name “Battle Apocalypse” and was directed by John Klein who bases his story in the future of the year 2038. Everything is dead, almost everyone is gone, and there seems to be only a wasteland of infected left. Two survivors are just trying to survive the best way they can until they come in contact with a another woman one evening while traveling through a big empty city or so they thought. Josh and Penelope take her in and try to make the best of it as their new friend tells them about a bigger group of people that will be waiting outside of the city. Problem is they must fight through the infected to get there. Klein provides hints along the way of what exactly happen to make this wasteland possible and stays away from the term ‘zombies’ or even ‘ghouls’ throughout the film. What interested me was instead of going the way of gore galore the zombie Eye-talian way, John Klein lets his characters and dialogue  bring his imaginative brilliant vision to life. Klein’s film succeeds where the highly regarded zombie film “The Dead” failed. He does not rely on the ‘zombies’ or in this film’s case the ‘infected’ to tell the story but the survivors of the fallout of 2019 and how they are still surviving all these years later to tell it. For that I thank you John Klein as you have given me the first horror flick to be on my “best of 2015 list”. I give the independent flick 4 out of 4 stars and info on it can be found at www.therestaredead.com .

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Legacy of Thorn (DVD/Vimeo) – Okay horror fans we got a new independent flick from the UK that combines elements of the “Splatterhouse” video game, Jason X steroided look, and leap year. MJ Dixon crafted a story about a group of friends who have been attacked by a supernatural force four years before on February 28th, now four years past and barely surviving the last attack the group of friends capture the supernatural being and to kill it for good. But the local authorities’ break-in on them right before they are to behead the being (Thorn) and gory chaos begins as the unstoppable supernatural force slashes and hacks his way through everyone. Is there way to stop him? Is there a real reason he only comes every four years looking for a singular person? And why does a group of armed personal show up to capture Thorn and we get to see they are a part of “Project Slasher House”? (Which “Slasher House” is another flick from filmmaker MJ Dixon I am now interested in seeing.) All great questions in this fun and crazy over the top supernatural slasher flick. I love this kind of independent horror flicks because it shows vision, fun, and excitement! Maybe Mr. Dixon needs to contact Mr. Steve Rudzinski here in the states about his project “Slasher Hunters” because great minds think alike!!! And for that I give this wonderful project from the UK 3 out of 4 stars and you can find out more about it at www.legacyofthorn.com .

Pernicious

Pernicious (DVD/Vimeo) – Three pretty young woman go to Thailand to “save the world” in their own words. Julia and friends are staying at a nice hut, home, not totally sure what you call it on that side of the world but anyway they get to their place of dwelling and find a freaky ass gold statue of a child. The girls go out and party, pick up some ugly dudes, get drugged, and the three go “all Fred Vogel and Toe Tag Pictures” on these three dumb dudes. The girls wake up like they didn’t sleep to find the statue has gone, their gold jewelry is gone, and the ugly dudes are gone. Not sure of calling the police or what to do but they do decide they need to replace the statue or they will get fucked up. So of course they go visit a witch and she tells them “the statue could be a black market thing”. Never mind the story some old crazy Thai dude keeps trying to tell them about the statue. But apparently it’s not going to end well for Julia and friends as they didn’t pay tribute to this odd statue when arriving. The horror film has its gory moments and believes James Cullen Bressack has made another film that will make a lot of horror fans happy. Be warned my friends there is a gruesome fingernail removal scene, I know some of you will cringe or puke… I have seen it. So keep your eye out for this gruesome flick as I give it 2 ½ out of 4 stars and you can find out more at www.jamescullenbressack.com .

 

Megaforce (DVD) – Oh I so wanted to see this movie for so long and now that I finally have, I was not disappointed in a film that you could call a prelude to the G.I.JOE cartoon. No shit folks, Barry Bostwick and his hair command an elite force aka Phantom Army that defends freedom all over the world. They are hired by that dude that gave Michael Knight, K.I.T.T. and they need to go fight some commandos led by Henry Silva. But the topper for me was Michael Beck showing up and rides a motorcycle just like the one he does in “Battletruck aka Warlords of 21st Century”. My mind was blown people… They work their ass off to make the filler of the movie interesting but it pays off when Barry Bostwick and his hair are flying on a motorcycle! Believe it as I give this masterpiece of greatness 4 stars.

 

Any comments or questions please send to: GrossMovieReview@verizon.net, GrossMovieReview@aol.com or www.facebook.com/grossmoviereviews . Remember folks always support your local independent movie theater, independent video store, and independent filmmakers! It will keep horror alive………

You can always visit and see some past reviews, independent film news, or me ranting at: www.grossmoviereviews.com !!!

Don’t forget you can also hear Kyle Poling and me talking about horror flicks on a weekly basis on the Bloodbaths and Boomsticks podcast at: www.bloodbathspodcast.blogspot.com/

Plus you can always go to the greatest T-shirt place online or if you are in Texas visit the store of “Fast Custom Shirts” where T-shirt Joe is the only place you should purchase your horror T-shirts: Go to www.fastcustomshirts.com for details.

See yinz at Horror Realm March 6-8th, 2015 as you will find me in the “Out of Print Film Room” presented by Gross Movie Reviews. For details visit www.horrorrealmcon.com .

And do not forget to order your copy of Gross Movie Reviews: The Wrath of Gross at: http://www.lulu.com/shop/tim-gross/gross-movie-reviews-the-wrath-of-gross/paperback/product-21975934.html