Gross Movie Reviews #337

By Tim Gross

Video Violence (DVD) – In 1987 Gary P. Cohen wrote and directed a S.O.V. flick that would soon find cult status among horror and independent films fans as he crafted a horror flick that was perfect for the late 80s. Steve just bought a video store in a small town where he is the only video rental place around. Problem is that he and his employee Rick noticed the townsfolk are not talkative and only rent slasher films. They never rent a comedy, drama, etc. But one day an unlabeled VHS tape is left in the slot return. Steve and Rick watch it only to wonder if it’s a snuff film until they see the one being killed looks familiar. Steve goes to the authorities and brings them to the store where there is no tape and no Rick. Steve soon learns there are more tapes and more people dying. Problem is the whole town is in on it and Howard and Eli are the stars. This is a piece of VHS history even if Gary P. Cohen really never did anything this film or its sequel as I give it 3 stars. “When renting isn’t enough…”

Video Violence 2: The Exploitation (DVD) – The sequel picks up seconds after the first film with Howard and Eli having their own show and trying to pirate into local and national stations so they can go global. This in hope of bringing their murderess ways to the masses, they even ask for fan murder tapes. Most of the film takes place in a basement where the show is captured live. The idea of the movie fizzles out quickly as it seems the best work was done in the first film. But that doesn’t stop Howard and Eli raising their body count. If you watch the first flick, remember to prepare yourself for a boring sequel. I give the flick 1 ½ stars.

Cemetery Gates (DVD) – The film stars Reggie Bannister as a scientist who has been experimenting with a Tasmanian devil for several years only to see it escape with help from some dumb ass who believes science is bad. Once out in the open woods the mutation finds friendly surroundings around an old cemetery where a small film crew is more than enough to satisfy its hunger. Meanwhile Reggie and his associate are trying to figure out a way to stop the beast. Lots of cool gore, a great looking creature, and Greg Nicotero and Howard Berger playing hippies getting high make for a fun movie that I believe that has gone unnoticed. I give the creature feature 3 stars.

Horns (DVD) – I heard it was based on a book and since I don’t have much time to read books it doesn’t matter as Harry Potter finds out the hard way of what it is like to fall in love with a ginger and have her taken away from you. The film isn’t as horrible as what most critics have said about it but when it’s pushing two hours for no apparent reason except to bore you I can understand why. I give the flick 1 star.

Hauntedween (VHS) – A cheap budgeted slasher that you can call “a bootleg Killer Party” about a boy named Eddie “bootleg Grizzly Adams” who accidentally kills a girl in the “House of Horrors” his mother ran. Twenty years later and mother has died and Eddie wants to return her home. But Eddie comes back only to find a couple frat boys want to reopen the house for a fund raising “House of Horrors” to save their fraternity’s charter. Eddie likes the idea because he has always wanted to be the star of the “House of Horrors”. It’s bloody, it’s cheap, and I want the sequel it promised but never delivered as I give the flick 2 stars. There is supposedly a 20^th anniversary out of print DVD floating around but very hard to find?

Her Name Was Torment (DVD) – Dustin Wayde Mills seems to make independent films as quickly as you blink these days as the man never sleeps. Mr. Mills always doing a different independent project from the last decides to dip his toes in the water of torture films with this project. Now, most of these types of films are not my cup of tea but Mr. Mills does some interesting things with this film that kept my attention in between a masked naked woman known as ‘Patient 394’ who believes she is doing the bidding of the “Overseer”. If you are a fan of the “August Underground” films this might fill the void for you? If you are weird and an “X-file” fan like myself the clips of unknown person asking questions to the young lady to learn about her sets up a possible series of interesting films well worth keeping an eye out for… I may not be a big fan of the film but I do respect the talent making it and curious to see where the sequel goes from here? I give the movie 2 out of 4 stars. You can purchase the film at www.dmp.storenvy.com .

Dead & Buried (DVD) – A local sheriff of a small creepy town has noticed some strange things about a car accident where a man was burned badly and no one seems to remember knowing. The sheriff does some digging and finds out the man has been dead for months, maybe? Soon the townsfolk begin acting strange and other people begin to disappear. The Lovecraft-type of film still works today with its creepy drama and fun effects. A great DVD release from William Lustig’s Blue Underground label that is worth revisiting often as I give the film 3 stars.

Embedded (DVD) – A cheap movie I found on Amazon about a Sasquatch or Sasquatches… A reporter and his fellow cameraman find their way into a small Montana town where cattle have gone missing, and recently a person or two have disappeared. The cameraman hoping for footage for a documentary and the reporter just hoping not to die of boredom are not prepared for what they find out in the woods? After a teenage boy goes missing and the father rolls into town all tore up, the sheriff gathers a small group of hunters to go into the woods and track down the boy or his remains. Thinking it’s not aliens and just crazy small town rednecks the reporter and his cameraman get the scoop of a lifetime as something has just torn up an officer! Deeper in the woods they go the hunters become the hunted when some weird hairy creature is stalking them. The film is set up like a found footage Sasquatch film but doesn’t act like one at all times. From what I have heard and read Sasquatches are the new zombies of the horror genre so prepare yourself for a slew of Bigfoot flicks. I give the film 2 ½ stars.

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Don’t forget you can also hear Kyle Poling and me talking about horror flicks on a weekly basis on the Bloodbaths and Boomsticks podcast at http://bloodbathsandboomsticks.blogspot.com/ .

Plus you can always go to the greatest T-shirt place online or if you are in Texas visit the store of “Fast Custom Shirts” where T-shirt Joe is the only place you should purchase your horror T-shirts: Go to www.fastcustomshirts.com for details.

See yinz at Horror Realm March 6-8^th, 2015. For details visit www.horrorrealmcon.com .