Tag Archives: Tim Gross

We talk about a Japanese classic and we go Cajun in this latest episode!

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We may be a day late and a dollar short, but through shaky internet connections, and Facebook trying to shut us down we show back up with a new show. This week we go to Cajun country so load your shotguns for GATOR BAIT 1 and 2.  Then Japanese shipwreck victims suffer through hunger and turn to eating strange mushrooms in MATANGO: ATTACK OF THE MUSHROOM PEOPLE.  Also we share stories of snacks, gross ass college roommates, what we watched this week, and we answer all your listener questions.  So check it out… it’s a trip!

 

http://www.bloodbathspodcast.blogspot.com/

episode 166

We do double duty this week on Bloodbaths and Boomsticks

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This week Kyle and Tim return and due to Kyle’s injury we pull double duty and talk about 4 films. A Terminator / Aliens Italian rip off SHOCKING DARK, then ROLLERBLADE VENGANCE: TAKEN BY FORCE, then Kyle hits you with a Denzel double feature of the highest caliber with RICOCHET and VIRTUOSITY.  We also answer all you listener questions and talk about this week’s most recent developments… which may or may not involve tree rape.

 

http://www.bloodbathspodcast.blogspot.com/

 

EPISODE 164

Gross Movie Reviews #350

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Gross Movie Reviews #350

 

By Tim Gross

 

What We Do in The Shadows (DVD/On Demand) – Loving the horror flicks coming out of New Zealand as they are just absolutely amazing over the past year! This isn’t a horror movie as its more of a documentary/mockumentary about a camera crew given access to a flat housing four vampires in 2012… and crucifixes! The camera crew is given full access to film everything of this secret society where vampires, werewolves, zombies, all exist and living among us in a major city in New Zealand and always have. But the crew is there to record the everyday simple stuff leading up to an event called “The Unholy Masquerade” where all the monsters or creatures of the night get together for a night of partying. And no humans are allowed! It’s a well-produced monster reality show of the four vampires living together, telling their stories, and how they came to be until now. While the camera crew is there they mistakenly make another vampire who introduces them to his human friend Stewart who in return introduces the vampires to cell phones, internet, and friendship. Another flick I feel many people will have on their list of best movies for 2015 as I will. I literally busted out laughing more than a few times while watching. Great stuff! I give it 4 stars, at first I was only going to give it 3 ½ stars but I rewatch it and laughed harder.

 

Virtuosity (DVD/YouTube) – Its 1995, it’s another movie about virtual reality coming to life, and it stars Mr. Denzel Washington. Biggest difference between this and many other movies that were a product of that concept at the time weren’t very good in the first place but if anything this flick may have gotten better with age as I am the first to admit I did not like this film when it was first released. Oh, did I mention Russell Crowe is the villain, William Forsythe, Traci Lords, Kelly Lynch are in the film. The film centers on virtual reality of course or ‘LETAC’ to be precise as they have come up with a program called “Sid 6.7” aka artificial intelligence. He is to be shut down after killing a prisoner during a simulation for police training. When Sid 6.7 convinces his master to produce him in the real world, real people begin to die and it’s up to another convict Parker (a convict also) to go catch him. It is a little 1995ish but great sci-fi fun as you can see a young Russell Crowe before he beats up hotel telephones and Denzel realize he can be an action star? I give it 3 stars.

 

Gator Bait (VHS/DVD-R) – Is there such a thing as redneck-exploitation? Well I think I found it in this 1974 film that stars the absolutely stunning Claudia Jennings who died at 29 only a few years after this film’s release as a wild child of the back swamps of Louisiana. Claudia aka Desiree Thibodeau takes care of her younger sister and brother in the swamps and is pretty much left alone by local authorities. But there is stories of her cutting a man’s balls off because of him trying to bump uglies with the young lady and all she wants to do is be left alone to take care of her kin! Once she escapes the antics of the sheriff’s son and his friend Ben Bracken that he accidentally shoots when Desiree throws snakes in their boat a hunting party is formed to go bring her in and pay for what she did even though it isn’t her fault someone was shot. The hunting party consists of the Bracken family and the sheriff and his son. They tell stories of the legendary Thibodeau family and how they have lived in deep dark swamps poaching gators for many years. But after Desiree’s sister is shot in the vagina and killed Desiree thirsts for revenge hardcore style as she leads the hunting party deeper in the woods and becomes their worst nightmare. Never seen it until and think it’s an amazing 70s film! I give it 3 ½ stars.

 

Gator Bait 2: Cajun Justice (DVD/DVD-R) – A sequel made fourteen years later made by the Sebastian couple who directed and wrote the first film put their daughter in the lead role of this mostly boring and really useless film unless you are into incest… kind of? Angelique and Big T get married. Big T just happens to be the boy, now a man, from the first film who didn’t talk because he didn’t have a tongue but now is perfectly fine as he bangs the bejesus out of the Sebastian’s daughter on film several times. And before some crazy redneck dudes come by to watch her bathe, kidnap her, rape her, she escapes, fuck people up, end of movie. But that is the problem Angelique aka Sebastian’s daughter is a beautiful redhead… Awesome! But remember her parents are filming her rolling in the hay several times with Big T which is about 70% of the film. Weird! Incest weird… Like weirder than the Mr. Dario Argento rumors or stories horror fans have heard about with Asia Argento, oh yeah I went there. The movie is bad but takes a whole other weird reason to watch it when you know Jan Sebastian’s aka Angelique is given direction by her parents: Okay show more boobs… Good now you will be topless for 65% of the film and we will film the character Big T fake banging you in the sack! WEIRD SHIT PEOPLE?  Maybe this is the reason Mr. Quast and Mr. Poling believe I will watch anything and the human shield for bad movies? Anyway I give it 1 ½ stars, why… She’s a redhead, I thought that was simple.

 

Maggie (OnDemand) – Arnold Schwarzenegger and zombies shouldn’t be in the same sentence unless we are talking about my reimagining of “I Am Legend aka Last Man on Earth aka Omega Man”… Apparently I was wrong as I sat down to watch this amazing performance from crazy old ass Arnold as a farmer in the Midwest who is trying to protect his family from a virus that turns people into zombies and possibly came from the crops that are now being burned by everyone. His daughter Maggie runs away to the big city to see the devastation and is bitten. Arnold brings her home from the hospital to try and live comfortably before she turns. This isn’t your typical balls to the walls bloodbath of zombies as the film is more about the story of love between father and daughter and the progression of this particular zombie virus. You do not immediately turn into a flesh-eater it takes several weeks and there is a quarantine set up. It’s more of humanity still trying to control the apocalypse before it all goes to shit! Let me say also Abigail Breslin as Maggie was wonderful. There is maybe four zombies and a few ounces of blood throughout which sets this film far apart from your usual zombie fare but a must watch for all horror fans as Arnold may be doing some of his best work of his career right now! I give this cool zombie/end of the world flick 3 ½ stars.

Dont-Despair-poster

Don’t Despair (You Tube) – A sixteen minute short film from a filmmaker named Alfred Giancarli. Never heard of him but glad I do now. Alfred directs a fun little masterpiece about a famous serial killer… of sorts? Two collectors who meet to exchange a piece of history like most collectors. But this is different, the man and woman or Rachel and William are people who collect items of serial killers but this magazine William brings to exchange has an extra added happiness for Rachel as she can absolutely feel the thoughts and feelings of her favorite serial killer. And it is very apparent she feels the same connection now after talking for several minutes with William. Because of this connection Rachel has a special surprise for William and without me giving too much of the short film away I will allow you to go watch it yourself:  https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=FfOnRpmHbSI . But this one of the best short films I have had the pleasure seeing. Alfred gave great direction and Erin Etheridge and Kevin Reed were perfect for the roles of the two main actors. After watching it a second time I believe Mr. Giancarli is smart enough to understand this concept cannot be stretch to a full feature as it might kill the magic captured in the short film and some things should be just left alone as you move on to new and different projects. I give it 4 out of 4 stars and horror fans give yourself a present today and go watch this short film.

 

Kung Fury (YouTube) – There is a bad VHS tape that has horrible tracking and has a movie on it called, “Kung Fury”. A crazy mixture of nerd’em, the 80s, ninjas, and elements of the movies “Manborg” and “Iron Sky” and you have this crazy mix of a 30 minute computer animated film that has Hitler time traveling! It is one of those “WTF did I watch but I like it” films. It is set in Miami, 1985 where a cop named Kung Fury was hit by lightning and bitten by a cobra at the same time after his partner was sliced and diced. Now he has new super Kung Fu powers of some ancient monks. He stops an out of control video arcade machine that is giving people the finger and killing them only to ridiculed for all the damage done to the city. Seconds after Hitler arrives and kills all the cops through the phone and Kung Fury must travel with help of ‘Hackerman’ to stop Hitler. Brilliant and thank you David Sandberg (Any chance you related to famous Chicago Cubs second baseman Ryan Sandberg?) as I give the 30 minute film 4 stars.

 

Cheap Thrills (DVD) – This was an oddity sent my way by Out of Print Dan who said I needed to watch it. A pretty dark film about two friends who haven’t seen each other in five years and meet in a dive bar talking about all their bad luck of recent times. They meet a married couple who are having a good time and start making stupid bets like “who will drink the whiskey faster?” Soon the two longtime friends find themselves wrapped up in this twisted fantasy of free money and over the top bets. Everything from cutting off a pinky for $15,000 to banging the dude’s wife for $4500 as it just spirals out of control in a night of craziness. I give the film 3 stars and did I mention Trent Haaga was one of the writers on the flick.

 

The Abominable Dr. Phibes (DVD) – Oh the beauty this film is as it stars Vincent Price in one of his best roles as a crazy, over the top, undead doctor who seeks revenge against the doctor and his assistants who killed his wife several years ago. When people start showing up dead from bats, snakes, and all kinds of crazy things, Scotland Yard begins to investigate all the doctors past patients but is it too late for them to stop the reign of terror that Dr. Phibes spreads across London?  This is one of those films that don’t make total sense but you don’t care as horror fans just sit back and enjoy Vincent Price having fun and total weirdness of the film. I give the film 4 stars.

 

Dr. Phibes Rises Again (DVD) – Three years has past and Dr. Phibes has risen from the grave only to find his home in shambles and his map to immortality gone. This map is the key for his wife to be restored to life again as he is still protecting her. Soon people die mysteriously again in London but a strange death of a man dead in a life size Gin bottle sends Scotland Yard to Egypt where they want to capture Dr. Phibes before he spreads his reign of terror again. It’s weird; it’s the 70s, its Vincent Price playing an Organ, why wouldn’t you want to watch this sequel as I give it 3 stars.

 

Cabin by the Lake (DVD) – Judd Nelson in one of his best roles outside of “The Breakfast Club” where the character Stanley who is a writer and he is a serial killer. Stanley is working on a new script for a film that is supposed to be going into production but is still trying to decide how to flesh it out and end it. Stanley is a serial killer who not only kills his victims underwater but also sets them up in his garden where he tends to them daily until one gets away. And with the help of a special effects couple and the local police they try to set up Stanley so he can be captured. I believe this flick premiered on the USA network in 2000 before being released on DVD. Don’t forget to check out Michael Weatherly as the deputy before he became an N.C.I.S. agent on the long running popular NCIS show. I give the film 3 stars.

 

Return to Cabin by the Lake (DVD) – The sequel was released a year later but takes place a couple years later as a film crew is trying to film the story of Stanley and his “Garden of Flesh”. Stanley survives the first film and returns killing his way onto the set of the movie of his life as a second-unit director where he is trying to have the story told correctly. The movie centers more on more of his obsession as a writer is trying to get into Stanley’s head even he is believed dead to make the movie the way it should be. Bodies pile up and Judd Nelson is still pretty good as Stanley the serial killer but the sequel loses its luster the original had as I give it 2 stars.

 

Any comments or questions please send to: GrossMovieReview@verizon.net, GrossMovieReview@aol.com or www.facebook.com/grossmoviereviews . Remember folks always support your local independent movie theater, independent video store, and independent filmmakers! It will keep horror alive………

You can always visit and see some past reviews, independent film news, or me ranting at: www.grossmoviereviews.com !!!

Don’t forget you can also hear Kyle Poling and me talking about horror flicks on a weekly basis on the Bloodbaths and Boomsticks podcast at: www.bloodbathspodcast.blogspot.com/

Plus you can always go to the greatest T-shirt place online or if you are in Texas visit the store of “Fast Custom Shirts” where T-shirt Joe is the only place you should purchase your horror T-shirts: Go to www.fastcustomshirts.com for details.

And do not forget to order your copy of Gross Movie Reviews: The Wrath of Gross at: http://www.lulu.com/shop/tim-gross/gross-movie-reviews-the-wrath-of-gross/paperback/product-21975934.html or pick up a copy at Horror Realm July 24-26th, 2015 as Out of Print Dan and myself will have a table there! Go to www.horrorrealmcon.com for more details on the convention.

Gross Movie Reviews #349

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Gross Movie Reviews #349

 

By Tim Gross

 

Age of Tomorrow (DVD/SyFy Channel) – It is a cheap “Armageddon” meets “War of the Worlds”, so of course I had to see it but the real question is: Do you? I give it 1 star.

 

Mad Max: Fury Road (Theater) – What can be said about this amazing movie that hasn’t already been said. I know just thinking about the film gets me a high school boner but anyway it has been 30 years since the last sequel and things have changed script wise, casting wise, etc. But George Miller being undeterred by this process possibly put together the best movie sequel ever made? Oh yes I went there “Aliens”, “Terminator 2”, and “Dawn of the Dead” fans. I believe this film has entered that debate but that is for another time… Max now played by Tom Hardy, perfectly mind you is or has gone completely mad. He has flashbacks, he is afraid of the living and dead but yet there is still an ounce of humanity in him to help people against all odds with his life in the balance. After Max’s narration at the beginning of the film, insanity begins as Max is being chased, captured, escapes, captured again and becomes a blood bag (long story). After that you are introduced to Charlize Theron who apparently has a robotic arm of sorts and has her own plans driving the ‘war rig’ to a different destination. Through incredible stunts, car chases, death, and complete insanity Max rules and explains there is no hope. My best example of what this movie could be summarized is: Imagine George Miller goes I want $150 million dollars to make “The Road Warrior” on steroids! DONE! Toecutter is back, a blind man playing a guitar on top of a rig that shoots flames; the 660 HP police interceptor is back, Tom Hardy has eight lines in two hours of movie, old ladies can ride motorcycles and fuck up your ass from a distance, for the love of Mel Gibson and Tom Hardy this is the movie of 2015 hands down. Now for those of you that are complete asses that a) did not go, b) and the biggest problem claim the movie is 90% CG’d, c) think “Pitch Perfect 2” was a better choice… FUCK OFF! Now if you thought the film was 90% CG’d there is a good chance you are not reading this review or you are my friend at this point. Very few films get me wanting to argue the geek things of films but this film is my line in the sand of writing reviews. What does that mean? Well you can have the opinion that you didn’t like the movie, cool, I understand we can have an intelligent conversation about that shit. But your first line or two that comes out of your mouth is that its 80 or 90% CG’d, please do all of us a favor and stop existing so we have more air, fuel, and electricity for a little longer before the world does become a wasteland! The movie is so bad ass it gets 4 ½ out of 4 stars!  Thank you George Miller.

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Samurai Avenger: The Blind Wolf (Blu-ray) – A man who is out with his family by the lake basically has his dream raped and tortured. Several years later a blind samurai is seeking the man, Nathan Flesher, who did this wrong. But the blind samurai must overcome several tests before he even gets in front of Nathan for possibly his final fight of his life. A film that was released in 2009 that is getting the proper treatment from is a fun homage of cinema that became in vogue for a lot of Americans during the late 80s and early 90s of tape trading. The fun flick also has oodles of extras for fans to pore over for many hours. Synapse as usual did a great job on the package and the movie is a must see for “samurai’ fans as to me at least it had the feel of “Six-string Samurai” if it helps? I give it 3 out of 4 stars and can be purchased at www.synapse-films.com .

 

Interzone (VHS/DVD-R) – A 1987 post-apocalyptic flick that stars a Bruce Abbott fresh off of “Re-Animator” playing a character named ‘Swan’ who may be the savior to some monk named ‘Panasonic’ and his friends who are trying to protect their treasure. Meanwhile a hot looking muscle bound woman wants that treasure and has failed several times to bust through the monk’s force field but knows it is weakening. So it’s up to Swan after his life is saved by Panasonic to stop these weirdos from killing all the monks and taking their treasure. There is a six-wheeler golf cart with cannon on it but it’s never used which is a big bag of bullshit. And if wondering I believe there is an out-of-print region 2 DVD floating around out there as I give it 2 ½ stars. Would have gotten 3 out of 4 stars if Bruce would have be shooting people with that cannon “Sonny Boy” style.

 

House of the Long Shadows (VHS) – A writer makes a bet for $20,000 he can write a manuscript in a haunted house in 24 hours and it would be called, “Midnight Manor”. Soon John Carradine, Vincent Price, Peter Cushing all show up for a family reunion of sorts knowing the house is being sold and the man buying it shows up and just happens to be Christopher Lee! Plus the family has a deep secret that has been hidden for 40 years. Great concept for 60s or 70s Hammer flick but this is 1983 and those crazy two guys that gave us a bunch of over the top 80s action flicks thought they could make it happen again. Like I said cool concept but even in 1983 let alone watching it now the film just seems out of place and kind of distorted. Any way worth watching just because of the cast as I give it 2 stars.

 

Shocking Dark (DVD-R/YouTube) – An 1989 Eye-talian flick that was directed by Vincent Dawn aka Bruno Mattei and was at one point titled “Terminator 2” is a combo of “Aliens” and “Terminator” with most of the popular scenes from James Cameron’s “Aliens” ripped off! Venice, Italy has become what is now called “Dead City” as experiments poisoned the water and a deadly cloud sits above the city not allowing humans to live there unless underground. But once contact with ‘Shelter 65’ is lost it is up too Operation: Delta Venice to go in for a rescue and hope it’s not a bug hunt? Scientists fucked up and now they are all mutating and attacking any live humans. All I know someone’s has got sued by 20th Century Fox and most likely by several other people as I give this weird greatness called “Shocking Dark” 2 stars.

 

Matango: Attack of the Mushroom People (DVD) – A Toho Production about a ship that gets caught up in a storm and shipwrecks on an island that seems to have no life. While searching for help the small crew finds another large shipwrecked vessel that they find food on and use it as shelter. They also find that scientists were on board doing experiments that eventually went wrong. Now, if you eat the mushrooms you trip your ass off then die or get attacked by mushroom monsters/zombies that make you eat the mushrooms. Weird, creepy, and a little hilarious describe this 1963 flick as I give it 2 ½ stars.

roller-blade

Rollerblade Warriors: Taken By Force (VHS/DVD-R/YouTube) – A very popular title on Rhonda Shear’s “USA Up All Night” stars Kathleen Kinmont who is a pretty blonde actress who became a favorite of horror fans after her roles in “Halloween 4” and “Bride of Re-Animator”. Here Miss Kinmont aka former wife of Lorenzo Lamas is a sword wielding Karin Cross who is protecting a creature or woman of hope or post-apocalyptic nun named Gretchen during their trip across the Wasteland. Gretchen is considered a ‘seer’. Important… Meanwhile some dude in a gas mask and bio-hazard outfit must get a virgin sacrifice for the radioactive creature that roams the refinery that keeps the wasteland town up and running. Reminds me a lot of “When Hell Comes to Frogtown”. The most hilarious part is there are warriors on roller skates trying to skate across the desert but when it becomes fight time they suddenly lose their skates in most scenes and they are foot fighting men and for that I am thankful so no one was getting hurt. I give this senseless but fun movie that only seems to exist because I do 2 ½ stars.

 

The Walking Deceased (DVD) – A brand new spoof of course on “The Walking Dead” series but incorporates every popular zombie flick most people ever heard of into the plot. A sheriff wakes from his coma looking for his kid Chris, I mean Carl, actually Chris and trying to find this group of people who are hiding in a mall away from zombies. Once they all meet up and they close down the zombie strip club they travel to a farm in hopes of finding salvation. First thirty minutes I was laughing a ton but as most spoofs go on they lose their steam and become your average spoof that you usually never revisit again. But just knowing this exists will most likely piss off “The Walking Dead” hardcore fans which is cool with me. I give it 1 ½ stars.

 

Butchered (DVD) – A convicted killer/Terrace Skinner aka bootleg Kurt Angle has escaped custody before being sent to the electric chair to death. Meanwhile bootleg Joe Estevez drops his younger brother and friends off at an island in North Carolina for one last weekend of partying before parting for college. Do yourself a favor for a drinking game: Watch this movie and chug a beer or take a shot when you hear a character say “Oh my god, we are all going to die” and you will be dead. I give it 2 out of 4 stars just for having two bootleg characters in an independent flick.

 

A Bothered Conscience (DVD) – The independent flick begins in 1974 Arkansas where a man has a child with him and shoots another hunter. Soon this becomes a regular thing. Speed up about 20 years and the man is an old guy who is still with the child who is a grown man and is teaching him about killing people who are trespassing. The local sheriff comes out bitching about the 41 unsolved incidents and the old guy doesn’t care but threatens the sheriff’s life. Old guy gets his head blown off after someone is seeking revenge for a relative and now it is up to the son to take care of business. Problem, the grown kid is haunted by those who have been killed by his father. The movie is well-produced but I found myself not nearly interested in it as much I should have been? Different plot or structure it may have kept my interest but it did show the filmmakers have talent or at least an idea of what they want to do and that’s awesome in my book as I give this flick 2 out of 4 stars and can be found at www.midnightreleasing.com .

 

Any comments or questions please send to: GrossMovieReview@verizon.net, GrossMovieReview@aol.com or www.facebook.com/grossmoviereviews . Remember folks always support your local independent movie theater, independent video store, and independent filmmakers! It will keep horror alive………

You can always visit and see some past reviews, independent film news, or me ranting at: www.grossmoviereviews.com !!!

Don’t forget you can also hear Kyle Poling and me talking about horror flicks on a weekly basis on the Bloodbaths and Boomsticks podcast at: www.bloodbathspodcast.blogspot.com/

Plus you can always go to the greatest T-shirt place online or if you are in Texas visit the store of “Fast Custom Shirts” where T-shirt Joe is the only place you should purchase your horror T-shirts: Go to www.fastcustomshirts.com for details.

And do not forget to order your copy of Gross Movie Reviews: The Wrath of Gross at: http://www.lulu.com/shop/tim-gross/gross-movie-reviews-the-wrath-of-gross/paperback/product-21975934.html or pick up a copy at Horror Realm July 24-26th, 2015 as Out of Print Dan and myself will have a table there! Go to www.horrorrealmcon.com for more details on the convention.

The Mad Max episode is up!

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This week Kyle and Tim talk about the movie we have been waiting for for a long ass time.  And that magnum opus is George Miller’s MAD  MAX: FURY ROAD.  We even get to hear Tim’s mom’s thoughts on it.  Also, we see what happens when Re-Animator’s Bruce Abbot does after the apocalypse in INTERZONE… A movie about a golf cart with a cannon.  And Kyle watches a movie that is a bit of a slog to get through, but, boy does it pay off in the end in GNAW: FOOD OF THE GODS 2.  We also run down all of your viewer questions, and Kyle has a bang-up 2 weeks of movie watching to talk about.  Including that Kurt Cobain documentary that everyone is yammering about…….   Heroin is a hell of a drug!

 

http://www.bloodbathspodcast.blogspot.com/

 

episode 162

To help celebrate the new Mad Max movie this weekend my book is on sale!!!

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http://www.lulu.com/shop/tim-gross/gross-movie-reviews-the-wrath-of-gross/paperback/product-21975934.html

Click on the link and its 10% off from now until Sunday night 7pm as I celebrate the new Mad Max flick so take advantage of the sale now at lulu.com

 

Wrath of Gross color

 

We have our “Mad Max” boner party early as some great guests stop by!!!

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On the verge of our most anticipated movie to be released in a long, long time, MAD MAX: FURY ROAD Kyle and Tim are hosting a pre-post-apocalyptic Italian/Filipino boner party.  We welcome our guests JON CROSS, T-SHIRT JOE GARCIA, and RODRIGO QUAST to talk about a slew of post apocalypse MAD MAX rip-offs such as 2020 TEXAS GLADIATORS, ENDGAME, the glorious WHEELS OF FIRE, THE NEW BARBARIANS, and THE BRONX WARRIORS 2.  So sit back, relax, and let this episode waste away the time until FURY ROAD hits the screen and we all squeal with glee.

 

http://www.bloodbathspodcast.blogspot.com/

episode 161

Gross Movie Reviews #348

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Gross Movie Reviews #348

 

By Tim Gross

 

Wyrmwood: Road of the Dead (On Demand) – It is easily one of the most anticipated horror films since Rob Zombie’s “House of a 1000 Corpses” and has the tagline “Mad Max meets Dawn of the Dead”! I am here to tell you horror fans nothing can live up to that fucking hype. Very good flick but not legendary so tame down your fat peckers and bloated vaginas horror fans. The first good thing it got going for it is its ‘Australian’! Second, its gory as a mother fucker… But here it is, some weird shit happens overnight, like “Night of the Comet” shit people where stars are falling and people notice. But next morning some have turned into some crazy ass flesh-eating beings… Zombies! With a twist! Apparently, their breath is methane and they get faster at night as all the world’s flammable fuels have become water. And anybody that has A-negative blood type is immune to the zombie virus. Most of the film centers around two characters in Barry and Brooke. Barry just killed his daughter and wife and has blown his attempt at suicide so his next best option is trying to find his freaking hot artist of a sister Brooke who has been captured by some so-called government folks and is being experimented on. I totally understand the tagline while watching the film but my only problem with the film and it could be me nit-picking at it is the film is not sure what exactly it wants to be: that serious zombie flick, the zombie-comedy, the crazy ‘Peter Jackson type zombie flick, it seems to not make up its mind especially with the ending it gives us. Don’t get me wrong I really enjoyed it but let’s not anoint a film before we have seen it. I give the cool flick 3 ½ stars.

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To Hell with a Bullet (DVD/Amazon Prime) – A story about a singer named Billy who has been in a heavy rock band for over ten years and they have never got their break. One day down on his luck Billy is fired from his own band, his girlfriend wants to kick him out, and on top of that he just happens to kill his stripper girlfriend by accident. But things are looking up as Billy goes to see this voice doctor dude who is going to help Billy get his voice back. From there Billy gains a new friend who doesn’t care his stripper girlfriend is dead, he gets his band back, and a record producer is coming to see the band this coming Friday night. The story has been done in several forms over the years in short film, TV series, and so on, so it’s a logical choice to get a flick under your belt and put out there for the masses. I enjoyed the film from Vick Wright originally from the UK. I understand why he would go this route, but the film focuses way too much on the music than story and it’s a little long (106 minutes). That doesn’t mean it’s a bad film as much as it means to me Vick Wright to get a feel of filmmaking in Hollywood. The film has great direction, good music, great presentation, but would have loved to see more of the voice doctor/Satan character as many filmmakers do not flesh out this character enough usually due to restraints by the studio? I may have not like the flick as much as some horror fans will but what it shows me is Vick Wright hasn’t found the right project for his talents… I give the flick 2 out of 4 stars and wish him luck in the future. You can get the flick at this link:  http://www.amazon.com/Hell-Bullet-Timothy-V-Murphy/dp/B00WL8LTO0/ref=sr_1_1?s=movies-tv&ie=UTF8&qid=1431389442&sr=1-1&keywords=To+Hell+with+a+Bullet

 

Splatter Asylum (DVD) – A rereleased film from legendary independent filmmaker Todd Sheets from 1996 has found its way to DVD. Rudy has bought a mansion he wants to turn into a club but finds out the hard way it’s haunted during a house warming party he was having for friends. The friends find a book or journal all about the haunted house and all the fucked up shit that went down many years ago. The film is a crazy gooey mix of “Killer Party”, “Night of the Demons”, and ‘Lovecraft’ without the budget. But hey it’s Todd Sheets and I will watch anything that awesome mother fucker makes as he made the “Zombie Bloodbath” trilogy! I give it 2 out of 4 stars and more about the film can be found at: www.zombiebloodbath.com .

 

2020 Texas Gladiators (YouTube) – Not totally sure if its available on DVD but for the love of Rutger Hauer it is directed by Joe D’Amato and written by George Eastman under different names in all its Eye-talian glory! What you need to know: it’s a post-apocalyptic film set in 2020 where the so-called New World Order takes over an energy refinery and Texas Rangers come to fight them. No there isn’t no Chuck Norris… No there isn’t any Kevin Nash or Scott Hall… But there is random death and rape in this mish-mash of a flick that is like a couple scripts mashed together! So thank you George Eastman for not eating babies in every movie and giving us this random crap… I give it 2 stars.

 

Escape from the Bronx aka Bronx Warriors 2 (YouTube) – Don’t get me started on trying to explain which is the real sequel, this flick or “The New Barbarians” with Fred “the Hammer” Williamson as it’s more confusing than Charles Band’s “Puppet Master” timeline. But if you are a fan of the original “1990 Bronx Warriors”, get your motorcycle with the plastic skull on it and your Mark Gregory poster out as it picks up shortly after that. The evil rich dudes that failed to kill off the gangs in the first flick decided they had about $10,000 left from the first film’s budget and Henry Silva was in town so they made a sequel. Only in this flick ‘Trash’ aka Mark Gregory comes up with a plan to capture the evil president dude to stop the extermination of the people of the Bronx. Problem is the film leaves you thinking there may be a third film and it’s not 1983 so I am not sure if Enzo G. Castellari still has a unproduced script lying around. I give the flick 2 stars and well worth knowing it exists!

 

Wheels of Fire (YouTube) – A film from 1985 that not only is a bootleg of “Mad Max” but may have bought the left over props from the first two films down to the cars. Our main character ‘Trace’ rolls into a nomad town to see his sister who may have the most topless scenes in one movie ever made. Well of course Trace slightly upsets the nomads and they are after Trace and his sister. Trace’s sister gets kidnapped and raped often as Trace is busy doing his super bootleg version of Mad Max and meets another girl named “Stinger”. They have sex, she dies, and then he remembers to go save his sister. Amazing stuff folks! It is truly the closet Mad Max rip-off I have ever seen and for that I am grateful as I give it 3 stars.

 

Whispers in the Gloom (DVD) – Another rerelease onto DVD from legendary independent filmmaker Todd Sheets that was released in 1998. Aliens have landed and they just happened to be in a small town where a man who claimed to work at Area 51 calls into a radio show that gets shut down shortly afterward. The radio host and guest who happen to be an action star soon rock out in a Ford Tempo and must use kung fu to defeat aliens! Only Todd Sheets could make this shit happen besides the Polonia Brothers and it is acceptable! I give the very entertaining film 2 ½ out of 4 stars and can be found at www.zombiebloodbath.com .

 

Mother’s Day Massacre (DVD) – A skinny dude named Jimmy has always wondered who his mom was as he hates his father who mistreats him and his girlfriend on a regular basis. After his girlfriend encourages him to go to this mysterious old redneck backwoods town, his friends get murdered by two weirdos! Jimmy soon finds out his dad was more than just your average asshole and only realizes when it’s too late that he wants to bang the neighbor girl. It’s weird, it had massacre in the title, it is a slasher, and has a couple cool make-up effects, so of course I watched it as I give it 2 out of 4 stars and can be found at www.midnightreleasing.com .

 

Bread Crumbs (DVD) – Well if you ever wondered what would happen if Hansel and Gretel were evil and happen to stumble upon a porn crew who happens to be filming their latest project in a well hidden cabin you have your movie here… I give it 1 ½ out of 4 stars.

 

Endgame (YouTube/DVD) – Another 1983 post-apocalyptic flick that has George Eastman, Al Cliver, and Joe D’Amato all involved in the year 2025 where New York City is in radioactive ruins. The film literally predates “The Running Man” by a few years but turns into two different movies 30 minutes in when the lead character is asked by a mutant to help her and friends to a safe zone outside the city for gold. This flick may have the all-you-can-eat menu of post-apocalyptic Eye-talian flicks as it jams in ten different plots into one great film that has the “Rocky 3” ending.  If there was a film I would have to point Eye-talian film fans to it would be this classic as it has everything you could want as I give the flick 3 ½ stars. And let me take this time to thank George Eastman and the character ‘Ninja’ for bringing me this entertainment!

 

Any comments or questions please send to: GrossMovieReview@verizon.net, GrossMovieReview@aol.com or www.facebook.com/grossmoviereviews . Remember folks always support your local independent movie theater, independent video store, and independent filmmakers! It will keep horror alive………

You can always visit and see some past reviews, independent film news, or me ranting at: www.grossmoviereviews.com !!!

Don’t forget you can also hear Kyle Poling and me talking about horror flicks on a weekly basis on the Bloodbaths and Boomsticks podcast at: www.bloodbathspodcast.blogspot.com/

Plus you can always go to the greatest T-shirt place online or if you are in Texas visit the store of “Fast Custom Shirts” where T-shirt Joe is the only place you should purchase your horror T-shirts: Go to www.fastcustomshirts.com for details.

And do not forget to order your copy of Gross Movie Reviews: The Wrath of Gross at: http://www.lulu.com/shop/tim-gross/gross-movie-reviews-the-wrath-of-gross/paperback/product-21975934.html

We tackle two flicks on opposite ends of the cinema spectrum this week.

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This week Kyle and Tim return from another fantastic trip to the greatest convention in the solar system, CINEMA WASTELAND!  We recap all the goings on, answer your questions, recap what we have been watching, and cover RAZOR DAYS from Mike Watt and happy cloud pictures and a groovy 60’s flick starring Donald Pleasance A.K.A. the fantastical tiny P. in FANTASTIC VOYAGE.  Check out all the shit and shenanigans right here.

 

http://www.bloodbathspodcast.blogspot.com/

episode 160

Independent filmmaker Craig Everett Earl sits in with us this week!

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episode 159

 

This week CRAIG EVERETT EARL of INTRUSION & INTRUSION: DISCONNECTED comes back to the show to talk with Tim and Kyle about all thing film.  First off we have a movie that is kind of like what would happen if you replaced Michael Meyers in Halloween with a Bengal tiger in BURNING BRIGHT. Then Tim covers a movie that features legendary dude James Hong as a hopping vampire that plays basketball in THE JITTERS.  Then Kyle finds another glorious sweet spot movie that has GEORGE KENNEDY, BIGFOOT, ZOMBIES, ALIENS, and a ton of other goodies in DEMONWARP.  So sit back and enjoy.

 

http://www.bloodbathspodcast.blogspot.com/