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Category Archives: Gross Movie Reviews
Gross Movie Reviews #335
0Gross Movie Reviews #335
By Tim Gross
Stalking Bigfoot (DVD) – This was an odd find at a recent Cinema Wasteland convention but fuck it, its independent and its produced by Jabb Pictures. So two podcast hosts Tim-O and Harley set out to search for Bigfoot. It’s pretty much in the same mold as the first “Blair Witch Project”. Boring! But the film was put out by Jabb Pictures and that was enough for me to buy it and at least give it a chance. For that I give it 1 ½ out of 4 stars. You can purchase the DVD at www.jabbpictures.com .
Le Fear II: Le Sequel (DVD/Vimeo) – The latest from filmmaker Jason Croot is a mashup spoof about a director Carlos Revalos who believes he is ready to make his biggest feature to date. But Carlos needs financing as most of his pictures are low budget and wants to make his latest project on a ten million dollar budget and is convinced to put his house up for collateral. From there it’s just a nightmare for Carlos: his producer seems to be busy with everything except helping with this film (we are talking blow-up aliens and sparklers folks), at one point they must leave the main location because they don’t have the release forms, Most of their filming takes place in one trailer, actors and actresses walking out on the film, others just acting like complete divas and retards. It is a hilarious truthful take on making of a big budget independent film. I laughed a few times days after watching the film just because of seen this stuff actually happen over the years and to that I give this flick 2 ½ out of 4 stars. Check out there twitter page also:
https://twitter.com/Lefear2lesequel
The Lone Ranger (DVD) – Great flick about a man who believes in justice and peace in the old west… It’s just ashame two generations of movie fans have passed since this character was even relevant. My only complaint about the film is I would have liked to see a few more practical effects or stunts for the money that was spent on the project??? I give it 3 ½ stars.
The Raid 2: Berandal (DVD) – Only hours passed since the events of the first film and the head of a special task force within the police decides he wants the cop to stay undercover or be believed dead. Why, so this time he can go to jail for three years and becoming best friends with the biggest Asian mob boss’s son. Once again amazing fight sequences that will leave your jaw on the floor and great action but it seems this film is missing a little something that made the first film perfect. But do yourself a favor and at least give this sequel a chance as I give it 3 stars.
Half-Life Horror From Hell (DVD) – Filmmaker Mark Mackner writes and directs this crazy no budget Scooby-Doo plot driven film that stars the fucking nutzoid looking Jimmy “Superfly” Snuka as a Shaman and if that wasn’t enough it also features the amazing, beautiful, and talented actress Sarah French aka Sarah Scarlet. The Scooby-Doo plot has our hero or victim depending how you look at it named Brad back in town and he is still haunted by the events of an almost atomic meltdown ten years ago that took his father. Brad being an outcast in the small town soon notices his enemies or people who don’t like him are being murdered and there are reports of a ghost that looks like a man in a glowing radioactive suit. Meanwhile Sarah French’s character is trying to get some incest going if Brad is killed by her step brother! And Snuka is just Snuka in this crazy entertaining mess of a movie… as I give it 2 ½ out 4 stars. Oh by the way movie fans apparently radioactive ghosts POOP?! Go check out its Facebook page: https://www.facebook.com/pages/THE-HALF-LIFE-HORROR-FROM-HELL/162694619157
Zombie (DVD) – Lucio Fulci’s masterpiece that started the waterfall of Eye-talian zombie flicks in the early 80s and inspired many filmmakers looks more beautiful than ever on its latest transfer to DVD/Blu-ray. For those who been living under a rock it’s a gruesome zombie film about a woman concerned for her father when his boat shows up in one of New York’s harbors and all that is there is a fat zombie! So she takes upon herself with help from a New York reporter who wants to get to the bottom of what happen and where this originated. Their adventure takes them to an uncharted island where voodoo rules and the natives are pissed! The zombies rise and start fucking shit up. We are talking eye stabbing and underwater shark chomping! Fulci gave many the template of how to make a gritty and mean zombie film and I give the flick 4 stars for that.
Hole in the Wall (DVD) – Derek Carey and quite a few other Wisconsin filmmakers put together an independent anthology full of grit and sleaze that is not for the normal movie viewer. This anthology tests you the viewer what’s good or bad taste and has fun along the way as the film features: a crazy dude does all kinds of freaky and disturbing sexual shit, Goth whores who bring back Ed Gein’s evil spirit, a very odd couple having relationship issues, let’s not forget the appearance of a “Swamphead” VHS tape, psychedelic urine, period blood that makes a woman kill the world, a beautiful voice that controls men, and a man teaching an innocent curious farm boy about the joys of death that wraps up the anthology like a nice birthday present. Talking family entertainment people… Mr. Carey and company’s anthology is gruesome, intriguing, unstable and sometimes uncomfortable which makes this project brilliant find for the independent gorehounds. I give the film 3 out of 4 stars. Find out more about it at:
The Zombie King (DVD/YouTube) – A UK zombie film about misfits trying to survive the zombie apocalypse that was brought on by some bullshit: 7 swords, 7 souls, 7 days, 7 archangels, I don’t know. But anyway there is a Bill Goldberg zombie, a bloated Edward Furlong, and a demonized Corey Feldman there long enough to collect a paycheck that was more than the budget for this poor excuse for a zombie film as I give it 2 stars.
Vampire Chicks with Chainsaws (DVD/YouTube) – An independent film made for a thousand dollars that raises the question: Why do vampire chicks need chainsaws? Because it is essential to the plot of course! Some poor soul of a man must face off against some vampire chicks that want him dead since his blood is tainted…infected? If it wasn’t bad enough some hillbilly stole his wife, he needs help from a vampire hunter he is unsure about if he is going to defeat these female vampire demons that seem to have a fascination for chainsaws. The film smartly uses locations well and does not fall into the stupid people pit of having lesbian vampires. For its little budget and smart script I was relatively surprised how much I enjoyed this Indy vamp flick. I give it 2 ½ out of 4 stars and always enjoy supporting projects like this. And movie fans you can find the full movie on YouTube.
Any comments or questions please send to: GrossMovieReview@verizon.net, GrossMovieReview@aol.com or www.facebook.com/grossmoviereviews . Remember folks always support your local independent movie theater, independent video store, and independent filmmakers! It will keep horror alive………
You can always visit and see some past reviews, independent film news, or me ranting at: www.grossmoviereviews.com !!!
Don’t forget you can also hear Kyle Poling and me talking about horror flicks on a weekly basis on the Bloodbaths and Boomsticks podcast at http://bloodbathsandboomsticks.blogspot.com/ .
Plus you can always go to the greatest T-shirt place online or if you are in Texas visit the store of “Fast Custom Shirts” where T-shirt Joe is the only place you should purchase your horror T-shirts: Go to www.fastcustomshirts.com for details.
Gross Movie Reviews #334
0Gross Movie Reviews #334
By Tim Gross
Thr33 Days Dead (DVD/SyFy Channel) – This feature was a product of a SyFy Channel reality show called “Town of the Living Dead”. I believe it was 12 half hour episodes of a film crew struggling for the past six years to make a zombie movie in Jasper, Alabama on no budget. If they finish it they get their film to premiere on SyFy Channel? Well, of course they finished it, problem is unless you were retarded like me and checked for the 1 am time it was listed you were not going to see the finished product. Good, bad, ugly idea… I was just glad SyFy threw the film on TV. But from what I have read it didn’t get good enough ratings to warrant a Saturday night time slot which kinda sucked. Personally, I hope someone takes notice of the idea not the movie? Great idea, poor execution of a movie… But anyhow without ranting on about this idea the six years in the making zombie movie suffers like most independent movies that go on way too long from no budget. It doesn’t hurt to think big when zombies are attacking a small town but if you don’t have the resources to pull it off you get this finished project. Three guys trying to survive a zombie apocalypse with impossible odds. I give it 1 ½ stars.
Happy Hour Holocaust (DVD) – A fun anthology film project directed and written by Jim Roberts and has help behind and in front of the camera from two other talented people in Tim Novotny and Jorge Delarosa. These three independent filmmakers finally have come together to start making projects and I FUCKING LOVE THE IDEA! These three guys have done impressive and different stuff the past couple years that have me absolutely salivating for what they do next…? But in the meantime we get this fun Indy project that taught me three things: 1) Crazy people should always get their meds, 2) don’t trust a cute girl that’s psycho, 3) and don’t trust an empty bar on Halloween night! Also there is way too much crotch mutilation in this flick so dudes prepare to cringe at least three times. Horror fans talk of Ty West, Eli Roth, etc., I say fuck that shit! These are the filmmakers to pay attention too: Jim Roberts, Tim Novotny, and Jorge Delarosa. Remember the names because they are the future of horror! I give the project 3 out of 4 stars.
The House That Dripped Blood (DVD) – A great and subtle flick about a house that has a past of people dying in it for various reasons. Not the best film starring these folks: Christopher Lee, Peter Cushing, Ingrid Pitt, and that dude from Indiana Jones but a great excuse to watch a cool British horror film from the early 70s. I give it 2 ½ stars.
Abraxas: The Guardian of the Universe (VHS) – Well if Jesse “The Body” Ventura is the guardian of the universe in 1990 I rather he pass onto another planet and let us die out because the movie should be arrested for viewer’s abuse! Leave it to me to find a horrible movie even by my standards starring Jesse Ventura. Jesse is a “Finder”, a peace officer in intergalactic terms. Well his partner has just determine he wants more power to rule the universe so he goes to earth impregnate some blonde bimbo that just happens to be Jim Belushi’s second wife so he can come back and rip a code out of the child’s brain! Five years go by after the incident and Jesse’s partner busts out of intergalactic prison to go find his non-verbal alien kid. I have more fun dealing with “Crown Royal” hangovers than watch this flick again. I give it 0 stars and thanks to Jesse for ruining the thought of him being anytime of actor.
Lifeform (VHS) – The movie is also known as “Invader” on DVD. The film is a pleasant surprise if you are a sci-fi/horror nerd. The mid-90s flick is about the Viking II satellite comes back to earth mysteriously after 15 years ago it being sent to Mars. Scientists get ahold of it to study it before the military is about take it away but find it may have a stowaway. Is the alien life form there to kill or communicate? One thing is for sure we are not alone in the universe in this flick that sports some cool creature effects as I give it 2 ½ stars.
Mardi Gras for the Devil (VHS) – The early 90s film is also known as “Night Trap” on a very crappy DVD. We got a long-haired bad ass demon serial killer in Michael Ironside who is slashing his way through New Orleans. A detective in Robert Davi is trying to find a way to stop the supernatural killer as long as his boss played by John Amos doesn’t stop him. Boobs, blood, and Michael Ironside being Michael Ironside make this a must see feature as I give it 3 stars.
Mr. Ice Cream Man (VHS) – Don’t get me wrong I love SOV independent flicks they can be so much fun. This isn’t one of those times as I try to stay awake through this boring story of a man who kills and stores his victims on his ice cream truck. Sounds familiar? Yeah, do yourself a favor and stick with the Clint Howard classic. I give this flick a ½ star.
Season of the Witch (VHS) – A very trippy early 70s film that just happens to be George Romero’s third film and was also released under the title “Hungry Wives”. The movie is a product of its times and doesn’t hold up well but is a great story of a woman named Joan that is tired of her normal routine life of being Jack’s wife, a housewife. So she turns to witchcraft! Interesting and weird and for that I give it 2 stars.
Mutant World (DVD/SyFy Channel) – A great concept film that should have been so much more but fizzled is about a meteor about to hit Pennsylvania and cause an apocalypse. Doomsday preppers in Colorado hide in their bunker for ten years only to come out to be greeted by mutants who want to eat them. The film spends more time on the Doomsday preppers arguing than fleshing out the story about humans finding a way to survive ten years after the catastrophe. I give it 2 stars.
Late Phases (DVD) – A blind Vietnam vet is being moved into a senior community by his son only on his first to have his neighbor attacked by a werewolf. He soon finds out there has been a lot of dogs missing and attacks once a month in the community chalked up to wildlife since the gated community was built near some dense woods. The blind vet decides he has a month to prepare and figure out who is the werewolf and kill it and the movie fleshes it out brilliantly. Great flick, Tom Noonan as a priest, and Robert Kurtzman as creature effects supervisor, count me in on this being one of the best horror flicks of 2014 as I give 4 stars.
Blood Lake: Attack of the Killer Lampreys (DVD) – A horror film that premiered on Animal Planet of all places has found its way onto DVD for all of us ‘killer animal film’ lovers. The film is the latest project from filmmaker James Cullen Bressack who seems to be one busy dude these days. An officer from the Fish and Wildlife just happens to be spending the summer at a small town in Michigan where there are lampreys invading the fishing areas and it needs to be resolved. Christopher Lloyd stars as the mayor of the small town and wants it done in one day but doesn’t understand the lampreys are a much bigger problem than he realizes as people are being attacked and eaten in the lake, their home, out on the road. The lampreys multiply quickly and try to eat the town whole. The film also stars Shannon Doherty (who pops up in the weirdest of movies these days), Zack Ward, and Fred Stoller. And let’s not forget the lampreys face death by weedwacker! It’s a hilarious killer animal movie that kept my interest as I give it 2 ½ out of 4 stars and can be found on amazon.com.
Hazard Jack (DVD) – An Afghan war vet is having trouble adjusting to society so he decides to set up shop in an abandon hospital to torture and kill people in to get his frustration out. He gets pissed when some college kids decide they want to play paintball in his home and they bring a pregnant woman with them. Which of course means for the integrity of the plot he cannot kill her that would be just wrong? There is lots of blood, sex, and useless plot but this film is exception to the rule of it equaling a great horror flick as it insults horror fans more than entertaining them as I give it 1 star.
Any comments or questions please send to: GrossMovieReview@verizon.net, GrossMovieReview@aol.com or www.facebook.com/grossmoviereviews . Remember folks always support your local independent movie theater, independent video store, and independent filmmakers! It will keep horror alive………
You can always visit and see some past reviews, independent film news, or me ranting at: www.grossmoviereviews.com !!!
Don’t forget you can also hear Kyle Poling and me talking about horror flicks on a weekly basis on the Bloodbaths and Boomsticks podcast at http://bloodbathsandboomsticks.blogspot.com/ .
Plus you can always go to the greatest T-shirt place online or if you are in Texas visit the store of “Fast Custom Shirts” where T-shirt Joe is the only place you should purchase your horror T-shirts: Go to www.fastcustomshirts.com for details.
Coming Soon Gross Movie Reviews fans!!!
0Its been over a year in the making and its all coming to a finish very soon. This is the final artwork from great friend and a great artist Ed Quillin! This book will mark a new beginning or the beginning of the end for me as an author. As any author can tell you it can be tough trying to sell your work?… But anyway crazy movie fans this marks book number eight I have produced in the past 11 years so keep an eye out for its release day and until then enjoy Ed Quillin’s wonderful artwork and
Remember folks always support your local independent movie theater, independent video store, and independent filmmakers! It will keep horror alive………
Gross Movie Reviews #333
0Gross Movie Reviews #333
By Tim Gross
Apocalypse L.A. (SyFy Channel/DVD) – The film was released under a different title last year “Disaster L.A.” but has been rereleased by SyFy Channel recently. It’s a zombie movie without calling it a zombie movie. Meteors start crashing to earth or L.A. specifically changing certain folks into flesh-eating mutants… hence zombies! Call them whatever you want but a group of so-called friends are fighting to get out of the city and flee the chaos. If you have destroyed many brain cells with beer like I you will most likely find yourself watching this flick just because otherwise choose your movies wisely my friends as I give this mediocre sci-fi flick 1 star.
Shattered Hopes: The Amityville Horror Murders (DVD) – If you were someone who was born in the 70s and remember all the stories of the movie and the family that left because the devil or evil spirits lived in a red room in the basement you’ll enjoy this… Why? It debunks everything we know then and tries to get behind the real truth of the home and the murders and there was a cover up of some things that happened during the murders years ago. Fun stuff I tell you kids! I give it 3 stars.
Edge of Tomorrow (DVD) – Tom Cruise continues to be in some of the best fucking movies I have seen years as this flick is “Aliens meets Starship Troopers meets Groundhog Day”! Starts off with you saying to yourself “I have seen this film before…” But that’s when the movie gets interesting as Tom Cruise plays an officer who has never had the pleasure fighting the aliens who are trying to take over Europe in the near future and when he does, he dies constantly! Then he wakes up to relive the same day and same invasion over and over until he is able to figure out what to do. Great flick, Tom Cruise was great, Hollywood keep letting Cruise in these very entertaining flicks as I give it 3 ½ stars.
Vampire Hunter D (DVD/You Tube) – I know you are saying to yourself, “Holy shit the Gross Man actually watches Japanese Anime?” And the answer is yes. Not much but I have my moments because I respect the genre as those who follow it all are small in numbers but embrace it more than horror fans embrace their favorite horror films. Anime is almost like its own culture. But I am not expert to explain to this so let’s talk about one of the best animated horror films of all time if not the best as this flick in my opinion changed everything in 1985. Up until then anime wasn’t talked about and most of us only had the pleasure watching such other animated flicks: “Heavy Metal, Wizards, Fire and Ice, etc.” “Vampire Hunter D” took the plotline of futuristic vampires, the action icon of anti-hero to save all, and amazing animated gore and threw into a blender which in turn made an amazing animated horror film that changed a generation. Magnus Lee a head vampire named after Christopher Lee comes back to his homeland after being gone for many years and finds a young girl he would like to make his wife. Villagers live in fear of her believing she will bring an army of bloodsuckers down upon them so they ban her from town. So she seeks the help of a known stranger who makes it his life’s work to kill vampires. It is violent brilliance in action my friends. I give it 4 stars.
Vampire Hunter D: Bloodlust (DVD/YouTube) – The argument can be made they waited 15 years too long for a sequel but we got one anyway and it is fucking awesome! Imagine films: “Vampires, The Road Warrior, and Gary Oldman from Bram Stoker’s Dracula” were mashed together and we get the great chaos in an animated film that has “D” trying to save a rich man’s daughter from a vampire that claims he loves her. The vamp and the woman want to leave this earth for a place where they will not be hunted and live in peace. Some people prefer this flick of the first but I enjoy the origin story more but this flick still has enough punch to gut for horror and anime fans to enjoy as I give it 3 ½ stars.
Invaluable (DVD) – A documentary that was written/directed/edited by independent filmmaker Ryan Meade, who took it upon himself to bring to light the greatness of Mr. Tom Sullivan. If by some chance you do not know who this man is you are missing something in your life. Mr. Sullivan or we should call him Mr. Evil Dead was the man who did the amazing special effects for the first “Evil Dead” film and is a superb artist also! The documentary dives into Sullivan’s life from the time he grew up and met Sam Raimi and Bruce Campbell to his soul mate dying (which I never knew about) to how Sullivan with just a chance meeting with Cinema Wasteland’s Ken Kish at a convention in the late 90s made him an icon among horror movie fans and convention goers alike. The film has interviews with Michael Berryman, the ladies of “Evil Dead”, Bruce Campbell all talking about Tom Sullivan not only being a great friend but the backbone of a film that still has generations of horror fans talking about over 30 years later! The film promotes Tom Sullivan’s artwork which is just amazing and I could stare at all day but also shows his traveling “Evil Dead” museum. Ryan should be proud of this project because there are still many people out there that don’t know about Mr. Sullivan and should. Tom is one of my favorite celebrities to have ever met and I will tell everyone he is one of us… a horror fan and has fun still too this day doing what he does. I give this perfect insight into the life of the artist Tom Sullivan 4 out of 4 stars. Now do yourself a favor and go visit this page and support Ryan Meade and Tom Sullivan: http://ryanmeadesmovies.wix.com/invaluablemovie .
Kickboxer 2: The Road Back (DVD) – Sasha Mitchell shows up as a third brother in the Sloan family who runs an old gym his brothers use to run until they were killed by Tong Po who was the villain that fought Jean-Claude Van Damme in the first flick. This flick has a shitload of faces in it that you will recognize immediately: Peter Boyle, Dennis Chan (who was the trainer in the first film), Cary-Hiroyuki Tagawa (yeah trying saying that three times in a row, but mother fucker is in everything), Michel Qissi as Tong Po, Matthias Hues (we will always know him as the alien dude in “I Come in Peace” and one of my favorite directors, Albert Pyun directs. An enemy that was disgraced by Tong Po for killing the Sloan brothers forces the final Sloan brother to fight for honor after burning down his gym and making him do yoga with hobos in the park. Good follow-up to the original JCVD flick as I give it 2 ½ stars.
Kickboxer 3: The Art of War (DVD) – Sasha Mitchell and Dennis Chan travel to Brazil to make some money but instead befriend a couple kids that live on the streets and must fight for their freedom. Some asshole promoter sells slaves/hookers, whatever and wants Sloan to take a dive during a fight to make a bunch of money. But Sasha says it ain’t happening and begins kicking ass all over Brazil. The sequel is entertaining enough to make me watch the next flick so let’s move on as I give it 2 stars.
Kickboxer 4: The Aggressor (DVD) – Sasha Mitchell is back for another round looking uninterested and without his buddy and instructor Dennis Chan. This time around some dude looking like Tong Po who seems to survive every movie is a druglord and is running Mortal Kombat/cough, cough I mean a tournament in Mexico to decide who will win a million dollars and fight him? Uninterested Sloan makes his way to Mexico to save his wife from Tong Po who won’t know its Sloan fucking up all his minions in his compound! The film is hilarious for the wrong reasons or the right reasons if you are weird like me as I give the flick 2 stars. Did I mention Albert Pyun was back to direct this sequel?
Kickboxer 5: The Redemption (DVD) – AKA we are done making sequels for now because we believe that Tim Gross guy and those two weird people from Seattle are the only ones that would watch part five in America. Huge hits overseas… here not so much. Mark Decascos takes over for Sasha Mitchell as the unstoppable American who fucks up anybody that messes with his friends or in this case kill off the Sloan clan. Anyway Mark’s character travels to South Africa to avenge Sloan’s death and the no name dude that gets his as beat on a rooftop by a couple of extras. Training montage, lost in Africa until a new friend’s sister picks them up, generic mock “Enter the Dragon” end fight scene and you have part five! I give the film 1 ½ stars. Good news kids there are a sequel/remake in the works being directed by Albert Pyun!
WolfCop (DVD) – I always enjoy when I find or hear about films like this feeling like the film was made just for me to watch and review?! The title says it all and I laughed my nutsack off watching this masterpiece. A drunken deputy of a small town named Lou that is useless keeps being sent out for disturbances in the woods of kids partying or doing satanic shit until one night his ass gets knocked out and wakes up in his own bed. Lou has flashes of what happened the night before but is unsure and soon becomes a cop who wants answers. Soon we got fun werewolf transformations; bad jokes that make me laugh my ass off, and a “Wolf Cop” car that is bad ass! Lou begins his bloody rampage through town trying to find answers and uncovers the truth behind the town’s leaders and why every 32 years a local event gets canceled. I love cheap Canadian horror movies as the filmmaker and company knew they were making a cheese fest and embraced it and that is what makes this one of my favorite horror films of 2014 as I give this son of a bitch 4 stars! And thank the lord there is a sequel in the works!
The Town that Dreaded Sundown (DVD) – Is it a sequel, a remake, you be the judge as it is one good fucking movie. The tatersack killer is back! 66 years after the original murders he appears again Halloween night 2013 during a showing of the 1976 film at the local drive-in. The townsfolk baffled, scared, want answers to why is this happening again, and a high school that is told , “to make everyone remember”? Jami is a shy girl who was just happy to go on a date but now is the center of attention as the unknown killer is back and haunting her but she fights back by researching who may have been the original killer as that mystery still remains unsolved. The film also incorporates the 1976 film and its filmmaker into the mystery as Jami believes if she can find the real killer the new one will disappear? Trying not to give away a lot as I was impressed with the direction the film went. So if you are a big fan of the original garb a six pack and pizza and enjoy this fun present day classic as I give it 3 stars.
Kolchak: The Night Stalker (DVD) – It all started in Vegas with Kolchak investigative reporter into the unknown. Kolchak is given a job to report on a murder of a woman having her blood drained from her body. Not sure what to make of it he investigates deeper and tries to bribe his way into the morgue and try other sources that may have other information as the bloodless bodies begin to pile up. But when it comes down to it Kolchak convinces the Vegas police they must carry silver crosses and wooden stakes to drive into this madman’s chest. Great 70s TV movie that as I said before inspired “The X-Files” and many other TV shows. Darren McGavin was awesome in this role as I give the flick 3 ½ stars.
Any comments or questions please send to: GrossMovieReview@verizon.net, GrossMovieReview@aol.com or www.facebook.com/grossmoviereviews . Remember folks always support your local independent movie theater, independent video store, and independent filmmakers! It will keep horror alive………
You can always visit and see some past reviews, independent film news, or me ranting at: www.grossmoviereviews.com !!!
Don’t forget you can also hear Kyle Poling and me talking about horror flicks on a weekly basis on the Bloodbaths and Boomsticks podcast at http://bloodbathsandboomsticks.blogspot.com/ .
Plus you can always go to the greatest T-shirt place online or if you are in Texas visit the store of “Fast Custom Shirts” where T-shirt Joe is the only place that you can purchase a Gross Movie Reviews and Jagoff Massacre t-shirt but also Cannibal Campout, Woodchipper Massacre, and a Spookies T-shirts also!!!! Go to www.fastcustomshirts.com for details.
Gross Movie Reviews #332
0Gross Movie Reviews #332
By Tim Gross
Assault on Precinct 13 (DVD) – John Carpenter’s second feature in 1976 is just brilliant! Great music, great characters, and Carpenter makes a no budget project feels like a big budget action fest. The film also stars Nancy Loomis and Charles Cyphers who would be in Carpenter’s next big film “Halloween”. Lt. Bishop is sent to the Anderson Precinct first day on the job to oversee its closing as the station moved. Nothing much is left except some boxes and a couple staff working there. Soon Lt. Bishop is in for the night of his life as a special agent with three prisoners who are being transferred and one is sick. They don’t have anything there to help but to try and call a doctor in. Also a man out of his mind wonders in talking about killing someone after his daughter was killed. Night falls and an unlimited amount of gang members call for war against the precinct to get the man that killed one of their own. Bishop soon relies on a mysterious prisoner, a receptionist, and himself to take a gang that will stop at nothing to kill all who are in the way of one man. This may be the best western, action, masterpiece that was overlooked for years by Carpenter fans during its time?! This film marks the beginning of a filmmaker who was about to unleash an unimaginable amount of brilliant films in the next several years. If you never have seen it do yourself a favor and watch it. If you have seen and it’s been awhile do yourself a favor and rewatch it as I believe it’s a piece of cinema we rarely have the blessing of seeing very often if at all these days… I give the masterpiece 4 stars.
Nightbreed (Blu-ray/DVD) – Well the much talked about uncut/Cabal cut (sort of) of Clive Barker’s cult monster film has finally been released nearly 24 years later. For years I and other cult fans of the flick have screamed about seeing a more complete version of the film. Even Clive Barker for years talk about wanting the fans to see what he created so many years ago. Now with that in mind did we get everything…? No is the best answer. But why is because some of the footage from 1989/1990 was just downright unusable. But if you are a hardcore fan there is a bootleg version overseas floating around called, “The Cabal cut”. But most of that footage and interviews about it is in the extras of the Blu-ray version and the so-called limited edition of “Nightbreed” that was released by Shout Factory/Scream Factory. This new uncut version is 20 minutes longer, some different music pieces, different ending, and a lot of different stuff that will make a Nightbreed fan’s heart happy with content just to hold what some considered “The Holy Grail” the past two decades. Your best bet is to own the Blu-ray version as it has a lot of stuff worth checking out as the so-called limited edition is cool but does not justify its $71 to $80 price tag. The Blu-ray does have the uncut version that will make you happy to own and just wait for the extras to pop up on YouTube (which several people have told me they have already been up with several attempts for them to be taken down) or just wait a year if not less for that despicable price tag to go down. Now getting away from that, I must applaud Shout Factory and Clive Barker with the film and its extras. By some chance you are a horror movie or monster movie fan that has never had the pleasure of viewing this film, now is a good time to watch it as the new transfer of the film is above and beyond that snap case relic from years ago. Midian is where the monsters live and Boone keeps having weird fantastical dreams about monsters and Midian to the point it is consuming him and affecting his relationship with his girlfriend. But little does Boone know his doctor played perfectly by David Croenberg has other things in mind as he wants to see, the knowledge of the monsters and Midian. Boone finds his way to Midian and soon dies after only to become a part of the tribe or Nightbreed. The film is an amazing mix of fantasy, monsters as heroes, the afterlife, serial killers that the world and 20th Century Fox wasn’t exactly ready for in 1990. I give this beautiful film about monsters 4 stars and thank you Clive Barker for you being so talented.
Body Bags (DVD) – A fun anthology that is rarely talked about among horror fans that John Carpenter put together in 1993 for Showtime. Carpenter plays a caretaker or morgue worker or a zombie, you decide as he is the thing that puts all three stories together. Carpenter directed the first two stories and Tobe Hooper directed the third. The first called, “The Gas Station” is a fun lunatic escapes and is killing people story that stars all of Carpenter’s friends. My favorite is Wes Craven as the pasty old white guy buying cigarettes! The second story called, “Hair” is an odd sci-fi story starring Stacey Keach who wants more hair on his balding skull and goes see a creepy doctor played by David Warner for an experimental hair treatment! The third story directed Tobe Hooper is called, “Eye”. It’s about a character played by Mark Hamill who is a baseball player about to make it in the majors but has a terrible accident where he loses his eye and it’s replaced with another through experimental surgery. He soon has terrible visions and also tries to kill his pregnant wife a few times. And it’s all wrapped up with Tobe Hooper and Tom Arnold performing an autopsy on Carpenter. I give the fun anthology 3 stars.
Teen Wolf (DVD) – The film that made it possible to make a PG rated sex comedy that has Michael J. Fox as a werewolf who is able to play basketball and help his high school win the championship. This entertaining film took the formula from the early 80s sex comedies and made it acceptable for Disney crowd. I give it 3 stars.
Captain America The Winter Soldier (DVD) – The sequel to the surprising fun first flick has Steve Rogers trying to still adjust to a new world different from his 70 years ago and questioning whether he should still work for S.H.E.I.L.D. Steve doesn’t want anybody to get close to him and is told to not trust anyone by Nick Fury. But a new enemy has been born or reborn and its HYDRA as they have been on the inside of S.H.I.E.L.D. from the beginning and it’s up to Captain America, Black Widow, and Cap’s new winged friend to bring it all down before the new HYDRA goes online and kills millions. Good film but couldn’t help to feel like it’s only in existence to bridge the gap between “Avengers” films? I give it 3 stars.
Apocalypse of the Dead (DVD) – A lower budgeted zombie film from overseas starring Ken Foree who was also a producer for the film. Interpol agents are transferring a prisoner when they arrive in town they just happen to be in the middle of a zombie apocalypse. Lots of zombies, lots of bad effects, and lots of shaky cam make this a zombie film that you should pass on. I always love seeing Ken Foree in a horror film but this is bad as the shaky cam will annoy you before the first zombie is shot in the head. I give the film a ½ star.
Animal (Chiller Channel/DVD) – Five friends are out in the mountains for an all day hike. A brother and sister haven’t done this since they were kids but know their way around the woods even when it gets dark. But soon they all are being stalked by a creature that has them trapping themselves a in a cabin with some other people who have been tracked and trapped. Soon tensions rise and the group become restless as ideas on how to escape are scarce. Great gore scenes, great looking practical make-up creature, and lack of origin of the creature makes this an interesting watch for horror fans as I give the flick 3 stars!
Killdozer (DVD) – An ABC Saturday night movie from 1974 about a crew of construction workers working on an island off of Africa trying to clear for new construction. One day while trying move some earth a bulldozer comes in contact with a meteor that had been buried in the dirt and a blue light is absorbed by the dozer causing it to be taken over by a strange alien force. Soon the “Killdozer” is smashing the camp and mowing down construction workers one by one. A great B-flick from the 70s that you it’s bad but a good bad from the start. I give the flick 2 stars.
Kolchak: The Night Strangler (DVD) – Another TV movie from the early 70s starring Darren McGavin as Carl Kolchak a reporter who has been fired and had to move to Seattle to seek another job. Kolchak finds a familiar face and gets with a newspaper to receive his first job and it’s about the recent murders in the square where young women have been murdered with no clues of who or what it could be? Soon Kolchak finds himself in familiar territory where after doing research he has found there have been six murders in the same area every 21 years for the past century. Of course no one believes him but that doesn’t stop him from insulting the police chief, the owner of the paper he works for, and being arrested. Great flick and if you are an X-file show fan this is required viewing as I give the film 3 stars.
Demons (DVD) – Synapse Films is rereleasing new versions of “Demons” on DVD and Blu-ray and if you were not lucky enough to snag the ‘Steelbook’ edition this is a good chance for you to get the Lamberto Bava and Dario Argento project at a reasonable price. Great transfer and color correction make this improved disc a must have for horror fans compared to the ones released several years ago by Anchor Bay. A woman is offered a free ticket to an unknown movie showing at a theater that has just reopened. She grabs one for her girlfriend so they can skip class and go check out what it’s all about. Then an unsuspecting audience begins watching a horror film about four poor souls who are in a strange cemetery where they find a strange mask that if someone puts it on they will become a demon. There just so happens to be the same mask in the lobby and someone has scratch themselves with it and soon a demon takes over the host’s body and begins feasting, ripping, tearing into other audience members flesh! The gore scenes look absolutely beautiful compared to the older versions of the film released. I give the new release at www.synapse-films.com 3 ½ out of 4 stars. The only downside is really no extras but uncertain if there is much bonus material out there?
Demons 2 (DVD) – Well of course if Synapse is gonna release the first “Demons” film you know they were gonna get the rights to rerelease the sequel also. Again a great transfer and colorful, an improvement over the disc from Anchor Bay. I do not like the second film as much as the first but it does have a great scene of a child that has turned into a demon chasing a pregnant woman around her apartment. This time during a birthday party Sally becomes engrossed with several others in a TV show that shows four people entering an abandoned town that was supposedly overrun with Demons! The Demons are awakening again and possess the birthday girl Sally so she can slash and gash her guests for her demon delight. Synapse Films does a wonderful job again and make this a must buy for a lot of horror fans out there as I give the movie 2 ½ stars. You can purchase the DVD or Blu-ray at www.synapse-films.com .
Any comments or questions please send to: GrossMovieReview@verizon.net, GrossMovieReview@aol.com or www.facebook.com/grossmoviereviews . Remember folks always support your local independent movie theater, independent video store, and independent filmmakers! It will keep horror alive………
You can always visit and see some past reviews, independent film news, or me ranting at: www.grossmoviereviews.com !!!
Don’t forget you can also hear Kyle Poling and me talking about horror flicks on a weekly basis on the Bloodbaths and Boomsticks podcast at http://bloodbathsandboomsticks.blogspot.com/ .
Plus you can always go to the greatest T-shirt place online or if you are in Texas visit the store of “Fast Custom Shirts” where T-shirt Joe is the only place that you can purchase a Gross Movie Reviews and Jagoff Massacre t-shirt but also Cannibal Campout, Woodchipper Massacre, and a Spookies T-shirts also!!!! Go to www.fastcustomshirts.com for details.
And don’t forget the Paranormal Panel I will be a part of on November 8th!!! https://www.facebook.com/events/1651835591709596/?ref_dashboard_filter=upcoming
Gross Movie Reviews #331
0Gross Movie Reviews #331
By Tim Gross
Porkchop (DVD) – Independent filmmaker Eamon Hardiman takes you on a trip to Camp Wood where the legend of a man wearing a pig’s head stalks the woods and kills all who try to have sex, drink, or just stay the night. Hardiman tries to give his vision of a throwback slasher on no budget and just having fun with the idea. Hardiman gives the viewer a lot of laughs, boobs, and blood along the way. But we also get two store clerks who are the highlight of the film besides Porkchop, people talking about $10 abortions, and death by lawn darts which is always cool in my book. If you like your independent throwback horror films: sleazy, corny, and blood-filled then you are in for a treat with this feature as I give it 2 ½ out of 4 stars. For more info or to purchase the films check out: www.razorsharpstudioswv.com .
Porkchop II: Rise of the Rind (DVD) – Hardiman and company are back with their follow-up as Porkchop has failed to fill his quota on stupid naked people in the woods and with saying that the film opens with “Death by Vagina!” But the main plot of the film is about a new boy who has just moved to the small town near by the legendary Camp Wood and his name is Simon and he has just met a cute, flighty girl that makes him break out into a musical to explain his circumstance. With Simon wanting to fit in and Meg wanting to help out her new boy crush, she throws a party at Simon’s home when his parents go looking for the movers that never came. Then comes a death by bong, lots of nipples rubbing, Porkchop obliterating teenagers, a cool death by tiki torch, and a twist to the story that deals with the cute, flighty Meg character. Once again lots of fun here to enjoy as I give it 2 ½ out of 4 stars and more info or want to own the film you can go to: www.razorsharpstudioswv.com .
Porkchop 3D (DVD) – Or if you are lame like me you just get the 2D version because I don’t have much faith in the 3D technology. It’s very hit or miss these days. As Hardiman continues his series about the brutal killer Porkchop we last seen Porkchop and Meg hand and hand as they are father and daughter. Strangely enough the film opens up with Meg being killed but apparently Porkchop’s years of raping young women has paid off as he has another young daughter to line up potential victims? But this time supposed survivors of the past have return to Camp Wood to lure Porkchop out with a lame plan. But Porkchop’s other daughter does most of the tracking and brutal killing in this sequel as she is trying to help her father against the survivors. Hardiman figures the formula worked for all those other slashers so why not for Porkchop? I give the independent flick 2 out of 4 stars as I just felt like that spark you feel watching the first two films wasn’t there. For more info or to purchase the films check out: www.razorsharpstudioswv.com .
Pig Girl (DVD) – With Porkchop dead, Hardiman uses Porkchop’s daughter “Pig Girl” to continue the killing spree! But with Porkchop now dead teenagers and stupid people alike feel it’s cool to go back to Camp Wood. Example: a college dropout and his step-father take a trip to the legendary area where all the murders happened. Soon murders begin to happen again. The film seems more relying on story this time to build up the Pig Girl character since her father Porkchop was killed in the last film. Possibly to give horror fans another woman of horror to cheer for? The film has a more dramatic feel to it but no matter what Eamon Hardiman is proving he has the passion to make independent horror films on almost no budget so go support as I give it 2 out of 4 stars. For more info: www.razorsharpstudioswv.com .
Ghost of Mars (DVD) – Ice Cube stars as Desolation Williams a lifetime criminal on the planet Mars who has been finally caught and looks like the charges against him are going to stick. Problem is he has six murders being pinned on him he had nothing to do with and strange things are happening to the mining colonies on Mars. A special police force comes in by train into an empty mining colony to pick up Williams only to figure out they are in for a shitload of strange shit as a Marilyn Manson look-a-like leads an army of cannibalistic humans that are possessed by Martians! Not one of Carpenter’s best films but definitely worth a rewatch as I believe it got a bad rep first time around. The film also stars Pam Grier, Robert Carradine, and a unknown Jason Statham! I give the flick 2 ½ stars.
Dark Haul (SyFy Channel/DVD) – Tom Sizemore stars in a very confusing movie about the Jersey Devil, its origins, and its sister which shares powers with it. Over 300 years ago a prophecy foretold of the demon and since then it has been kept captive by people within the government trying to make sure the end of the world doesn’t happen if the Jersey Devil gets loose? Sounds cool but ends up being a big waste of time at the end of the day as I give the film 1 star.
The Possession of Michael King (DVD) – The possession movies seem to be pooped almost on a weekly basis that you can’t tell one from the other. But that is where this one differs as the movie is about a man named Michael King who believes there is no such thing as ghosts, afterlife, demons, etc. King decides he will make a documentary with cameras on him 24/7 trying to get answers or the truth on the subject of possession, demons, and ghosts as he was heartbroken by his wife’s death six months earlier. Along the way Michael King does find a demon and it takes ahold of him causing him to have evil urges towards his sister and daughter. He fights it as much as he can but Michael slowly goes insane trying to figure out how or if he can get rid of the demon that is now inside of him. It’s a great creepy roller coaster ride that has a few jump scares for the horror fan’s delight as I give the flick 3 stars.
Any comments or questions please send to: GrossMovieReview@verizon.net, GrossMovieReview@aol.com or www.facebook.com/grossmoviereviews . Remember folks always support your local independent movie theater, independent video store, and independent filmmakers! It will keep horror alive………
You can always visit and see some past reviews, independent film news, or me ranting at: www.grossmoviereviews.com !!!
Don’t forget you can also hear Kyle Poling and me talking about horror flicks on a weekly basis on the Bloodbaths and Boomsticks podcast at http://bloodbathsandboomsticks.blogspot.com/ .
Plus you can always go to the greatest T-shirt place online or if you are in Texas visit the store of “Fast Custom Shirts” where T-shirt Joe is the only place that you can purchase a Gross Movie Reviews and Jagoff Massacre t-shirt but also Cannibal Campout, Woodchipper Massacre, and a Spookies T-shirts also!!!! Go to www.fastcustomshirts.com for details.
And don’t forget the Paranormal Panel I will be a part of on November 8th!!! https://www.facebook.com/events/1651835591709596/?ref_dashboard_filter=upcoming
Gross Movie Reviews #330
0Gross Movie Reviews #330
By Tim Gross
The Purge (DVD) – Ethan Hawke stars in a film where he plays a character that is well off money wise and has sold security systems to all in the gated community. But there is more to this story as the government as declared one day a year you are able to commit any crime you would like for 12 hours. It is to help people to purge any impure thoughts of committing a crime and it has help lower crime rates throughout the US. Problem is if you are poor you are screwed! Well people have come knocking on the Ethan’s door because his kid let in a potential victim and now must face the consequences. The movie is a fun concept and has cool moments but I do not understand the fan fever behind this flick? Maybe I am just old…? I give the film 2 ½ stars.
The Purge: Anarchy (On Demand) – Its one year later… and the “Purge” is about to begin. This time around the story revolves around a struggling mother and daughter whose building has been targeted by people in all black and they are helped by a stranger who wanted to take part in The Purge but used better judgement for now. While on the run the story unfolds more and explains The Purge may be a way for the government to rid of citizens they feel is useless in the new society. I enjoyed this film more than the first because I could see this happening? I could see the government or let’s say rich folks come up with a way to rid their society of lower beings in their eyes. This movie suits what is going on right now with Wall Street and Occupy movement, now that being said, I am a person who loves sequels but feels to continue this series will be a mistake? Unless they go ass deep into the government angle! That’s right I don’t trust anybody, except beer… and horror movies, and more beer. I give the film 3 stars.
Godzilla (On Demand/remake) – Another remake of the giant lizard that was brought on by radiation is too damn long. I love the mutation or evolution of mean looking Godzilla but the need to retell the legend of it or how the monster came to be and origins of what may be attacking earth now is getting old. A Godzilla movie should not be over two hours long. But anyway in 1999 some strange shit goes down in the Philippines, 15 years later the same shit is happening again but even worse and a government within a government has been keeping it quiet. While some man who knows the truth and everyone thinks is crazy is exactly right but little does he know the government knows Godzilla exists and they tried to kill him in 1954 with a bunch of nations but failed. Now only Godzilla is earth’s hope to fight some kind of alien creatures that have laid dormant for millions of years. This film is good but is far from one of my favorites as I am a big fan of all the early 90s remakes and will always be a fan of the original Godzilla films! But with that said I give the flick 2 ½ stars and remember it’s too fucking long!
The Device (Vimeo) – Jeremy Berg and John Portanova who are a part of the independent film company “The October People” are back at it with this new release that deals with possible alien abduction and strange events that are in the same vein as “The X-Files”. Abby and Rebecca are sisters who have been a part for many years have gotten back together at an old cabin again to spread their mother’s ashes. While walking through the woods discussing the past they come across a strange black sphere and something that could be a wrecked plane? They bring back the strange black sphere and that’s when things get weird… Dreams of creepy aliens, pregnancy, death, and etc., leads up to an amazing ending for this independent sci-fi thriller that I must say is one of the best independent films of 2014. Bravo Mr. Berg and Mr. Portanova as I give it 3 ½ out of 4 stars. The film is available through amazon.com and for details on upcoming projects please check out http://www.theoctoberpeople.net .
Reviled (Web Series) – Independent filmmaker Jim Stramel has decided to tackle the very bloated zombie genre and try to give zombie fans something different and interesting to watch. The first episode is about a man named Frank who has something different for the underground zombie pit-fighting world… His undead daughter! Its dramatic but at the same time keeps that gritty horror flick feel as world hasn’t been overrun with zombies it was a mere blip on the radar of life as nations have moved on with regular life. But most Americans are always looking that something different, that edge, that excitement, and in this web series its zombie-pit fighting. Stramel shows off his talents with not only a well-scripted and well-shot episode but the look and feel in opinion should have zombie fans clamoring for more! I give the new series 3 out of 4 stars and wish Jim Stramel good luck with the ongoing project. You can purchase and find out more information about the project at www.reviledzombieseries.com .
Corvette Summer (VHS/YouTube) – A great car flick about a young Mark Hamill who spends his summer searching for this amazing car, a corvette, that his shop class rebuilt after it is stolen. A great flick to take a ride down late 70s memory lane and has a great supporting cast in a naked Annie Potts, Dick Miller, Brion James, and T.K. Carter. I give the film 2 ½ stars.
Link (VHS) – General Zod aka Terrance Stamp is a scientist and enjoys monkeys as he lives them and uses them for experiments. Problem is after a student Elisabeth Shue asks and gets a job at his place the monkeys go ape shit in this very boring movie about a monkey keeping Shue’s character trapped at the house. I give the film 1 star.
Haunted House on Sorority Row (DVD) – The film is produced and directed by the talented Henrique Couto who gives us a tale of college girls who want to start their own sorority without hazing and other random bullshit. They find an old house on the cheap and know it’s haunted but really don’t believe in that shit until one by one their past comes to haunt them till death… I enjoy a lot of Couto’s projects but this paranormal Indy film just didn’t seem to flick my bic! The film looks wonderful, cool effects, great cast but I can be very picky when it comes to paranormal horror flicks. Knowing Henrique I know that won’t stop him from making several other projects that I will purchase and enjoy. I give the flick 2 out of 4 stars and it is available on amazon.com.
The Dark Power (VHS) – Oh the random crappy horror films I will watch folks? This 1985 low budget classic has a sheriff who carries a whip facing off against evil Indian spirits that have come back from the dead to kill! It’s horrible, it’s hilarious, and its racist so prepare yourself if you find yourself in possession of a copy? I give it 1 ½ stars.
Savage Streets (DVD-R) – The crazy rape/revenge classic from Danny Steinmann in 1983 that stars Linda Blair, Linnea Quigley, and John Vernon. Linda Blair is tough girl who has a group of girlfriends that are close and do everything together and they all look out for her sister Linnea who happens to be a deaf mute. After screwing over a dope dealing gang the night before by taking their car, the gang comes back for revenge by raping Linnea and beat the shit out of her. If that wasn’t enough the same gang throws her pregnant best friend off of a bridge killing her. That’s when Linda Blair heads to the Bear Trap store and gets all Blackjack Mulligan on the men who caused her pain that features the classic line from Principal John Vernon, “Go fuck an iceberg!” You would think the film would be easy to get but it has been released several times on DVD only to disappear several times to show up on eBay for a retarded amount of money. Usually I am all about paying the 10 or 15 bucks for a film but when most of the time it doesn’t get cheaper than $25 unless it’s a used copy and there is rumors about the company that does this shit on purpose I say “GO FUCK AN ICEBERG!” it is available on YouTube on a regular basis. I give the classic 3 stars.
Hardcore (VHS) – A 1979 sleaze fest that stars George C. Scott as a father whose daughter goes missing in California during a religious retreat from Grand Rapids, Michigan. Scott’s character hires a P.I. in Peter Boyle to find answers on where his daughter is? Soon Boyle’s character finds an 8mm short that has his daughter doing an explicit sex scene sending him in a fit of rage with more questions than answers. After firing the PI, George C. Scott takes an extended vacation that lowers him into the seedy world of porn and porno making. He poses as a producer and sets up casting calls in order to find answers to find his daughter. The movie does a great job of making you feel you a part of the seedy porn world of 1979 that is much more accepted these days. If you looking for something non-horror but want a film with a little edge leave it to an unknown George C. Scott film to me to entertain you as you will not be disappointed in this sleazy vehicle. I give the film 3 stars.
Any comments or questions please send to: GrossMovieReview@verizon.net, GrossMovieReview@aol.com or www.facebook.com/grossmoviereviews . Remember folks always support your local independent movie theater, independent video store, and independent filmmakers! It will keep horror alive………
You can always visit and see some past reviews, independent film news, or me ranting at: www.grossmoviereviews.com !!!
Don’t forget you can also hear Kyle Poling and me talking about horror flicks on a weekly basis on the Bloodbaths and Boomsticks podcast at http://bloodbathsandboomsticks.blogspot.com/ .
Plus you can always go to the greatest T-shirt place online or if you are in Texas visit the store of “Fast Custom Shirts” where T-shirt Joe is the only place that you can purchase a Gross Movie Reviews and Jagoff Massacre t-shirt but also Cannibal Campout, Woodchipper Massacre, and a Spookies T-shirts also!!!! Go to www.fastcustomshirts.com for details.
Gross Movie Reviews #329
0Gross Movie Reviews #329
By Tim Gross
Freddy’s Nightmares TV series (DVD-R) – The Nightmare on Elm St. series started off with great intentions in 1988-1989. Hell, Freddy was huge he was on the Today show, Arsenio Hall, the character that was burned by vengeful parents and comes back to kill teenagers in their dreams was a household name in the late 80s. So New Line Cinema decided let’s make a TV show. Trying to capitalize on the Freddy character with more adventures sounded great until it hit TV. First two episodes revolve around the origins of Freddy but after that many episodes came off as lame attempt of another “Tales from the Darkside” or “Tales from the Crypt”. Most horror fans like me thought we would get more about Freddy killing the Elm St. teenagers instead you a lot boring TV show. But soon it was apparent that once the TV series was launch Freddy would come in only for an intro and ending of the show and the budget of the show was cut in half quickly. If you ever have the displeasure of watching all the episodes you will notice three or four sets were used in almost every episode. The show had its issues besides not having much Freddy: the show wasn’t on what was considered a major network at the time, budget cut in half, Robert Englund was getting tired of the make-up during this span cause he was also doing part 4 and 5, and overall the show didn’t separate itself from the usual horror TV shows that flooded the market late night on weekends. But me being Tim Gross, I pushed through all 22 episodes of boring crap to find out the show still pisses me off like it did when I was 13 years old watching it. But I did come across an episode I did not remember called “Love Stinks” starring Jeffrey Combs who plays a manager of a pizza shop who uses body parts as his secret ingredient for pizza toppings! The show was briefly released on VHS in the 90s but was scarce and many episodes can be found on YouTube but there have been no plans for this series and maybe for good reason to find its way onto DVD. For me I thought this series could have been so much more if the right writers were behind it but they were not as I give the series ½ star out of 4.
Prom Night (Blu-ray) – Some kids are playing a weird game at an abandon building until an accident happens; a little girl falls out a window and dies. The friends swear not to tell anyone about it. A few years later they are all getting ready for the high school prom but someone has other plans for those involved. Someone in a black mask is out for blood as they are killing one by one the seniors who were involved in the tragic accident they swore to secrecy years ago. Jamie Lee Curtis and Leslie Neilson star in the horror film that has now become known as the beginnings of the “slasher era”. Synapse Films has now given the film a much needed upgrade as the VHS and first DVD release were never of great quality. But also included Additional scenes, great outtakes, an interesting making-of which goes into how the film came to be, and has one of the most entertaining commentaries with director Paul Lynch and screenwriter William Guy. Most commentaries can be long winded and boring at times unless its John Carpenter which I haven’t heard a bad one yet from that dude. But these days everyone thinks they should do one for their film and it doesn’t mean it’s a good thing for the fans. For “Prom Night” I felt like I learned a lot more about the film and how it came to be and have new respect for Paul Lynch as he had some great stories not only about his stars but some of the interesting people behind the scenes. Example: there is a great story about a dude who steals a van for a scene in the movie! Mr. Lynch figured enough time has passed that he could talk about the stolen van they blew up! Great stuff… I give the package 3 out of 4 stars and more details about the Blu-ray can be found at www.synapse-films.com .
Bait (DVD) – Tidal waves hit Australia and put their version of Wal-Mart trapped under water and sharks attacking the trapped survivors. A former lifeguard, his ex, and Dr. Doom try to help get the survivors out before Australian Jaws eats everyone. I give the film 2 stars.
Dead Air (DVD) – One of my favorite underrated actors Gregory Hines is a DJ in this 90s film that has his character haunted by a female phone caller that seems to be getting in his mind and screwing with him or is she? The film is influenced by Clint Eastwood’s “Play Misty for Me” but gives the story a different twist. If you are a Gregory Hines fan the film is worth a watch as I give it 2 stars.
Found (Vimeo) – An award winning independent film made for about $8000 with the story revolving around a 12 year old boy who is at that awkward age of “are you a boy, are you a teenager?” The boy is named Marty and narrates a lot of the film as Marty looks up to his older brother who likes horror movies and does not have many friends. But Marty’s brother does have a secret and it is in the closet in a bowling ball bag. Marty likes to go and inspect what’s in the bag as it changes often. Marty doesn’t have many friends either and gets bullied often in school but he is more concerned learning more about his brother because he looks up to him and his parents who don’t care for the brother. But as we get to the heart of the film, the movie goes from a story of a boy’s innocence and awkwardness to complete off the hinge brutality in the last 20 or 30 minutes that will leave your jaw hanging open! This movie is amazing and has one of the best endings since the release of the horror film “Inside”! One of the best independent films that I have seen in 2014 as I give it 4 out of 4 stars. It is available on DVD at amazon.com and if it helps it got banned twice in Australia because its original cut of the film. It also won the first ever Elvira’s Horror Hunt Film Festival. More about the film can be found at: http://www.theoctoberpeople.net/ or their Facebook page of the same name.
Escape Plan (DVD) – Stallone, Arnie, Vinnie Jones, 50 Cent, Sam Neil, that dude that played Jesus, that weird chubby dude from “Full Metal Jacket”, who isn’t in this flick? Stallone breaks out of prison for a living to show flaws in the system for the government, etc. to fix. This time Stallone is given a job for a prison that no one knows the location and it is for people the world just wants them to disappear. It’s a new high tech prison like no other and there is no escape until Stallone meets Arnold, together they can break out of the place! This is high grade action-cheese that I love… This is the kinda of stuff I was screaming for in the early 90s and my wishes have been granted with this flick, “The Expendables”, “JCVD”, etc. I give it 3 stars.
Fast & Furious 6 (DVD) – These car racing, drug dealing, weapons stealing, completely unrealistic movie plots are my guilty non-horror pleasure for the mere reason they are entertaining and I get to see Jason Statham fuck somebody up even its for only 30 seconds. This series proves Vin Diesel may not be the best actor but he is a smart one because he knows what makes money… I give it 3 stars.
Leprechaun Origins (DVD/remake) – The film that has been four or five years in the making is a giant disappointment. Four tourists visit a small Irish village for the history only to be locked in a cabin to be a sacrifice for a creature that loves gold. They escape and learn they are not the only ones that have been sacrificed for this creature. But apparently some folks stole a bunch of gold 15 years ago and the creature aka leprechaun is pissed off and these folks try to please him by giving him random tourists to kill. Let’s be realistic the “Leprechaun” series isn’t Oscar worthy material. But it was fun cheesy entertainment that had “Leprechaun Fly Girls”! This new version pretty much turns the character we all know and love into a SyFy Channel monster movie of the week. GIMME MOTHER FUCKING WARWICK DAVIS!!! I wasn’t opposed to an update or Dylan Postal aka Hornswoggle playing the leprechaun character but with all the blur effect, the make-up and creatures effects what was the point? But be warned by the lackluster movie I was waiting for and was disappointed by as I give it 1 ½ stars at the most.
Dead Snow 2: Red vs. Dead (On Demand) – We see Martin has survived the bloodbath of the first film but has forgotten he has a gold coin in the car and the Nazi zombies still want it! After Martin has driven off the road and wrecked. The Nazi zombies have a new mission and they need new soldiers to complete it. Meanwhile Martin has a zombie arm reattached to his body and is believed by police to have killed everyone on the mountain top. Martin knows he must stop Herzog and his zombie army or this will never end. Martin gets in touch with the Zombie Squad through the internet and they are hell bent on helping Martin stopping the Nazi zombie army from completing their mission! The sequel is just as awesome as the first flick and like the first film “Dead Snow 2” wastes no time making sure this will be a memorable and over the edge zombie film you will never forget. We got supernatural zombie arms, gore, zombies driving tanks, kids getting smashed and torn to pieces, Russian soldier zombies, more gore, reviving zombies all what you would expect from a sequel to one of the most memorable zombie films ever made ! I give the flick 4 stars and to me is one of the best horror movies of 2014…
The Chilling (VHS) – Linda Blair plays a character named Mary who helps clients through the process of having their loved ones transition to the cryo freezing process in hopes of a better tomorrow. But Mary doesn’t know the doctor and his assistant that she works for are selling the people’s organs in Mexico for big bucks. That is until during a bad storm on Halloween night lightening hits the building and the cryo tubes that turns all in them into burned C.H.U.D. imitations who are pissed off and fucking people up. With the help of a client and Grizzly Adams playing a security guard they must refreeze the weird zombie/creatures in order to escape. Great low budget/late 80s fun that I give 2 stars.
Any comments or questions please send to: GrossMovieReview@verizon.net, GrossMovieReview@aol.com or www.facebook.com/grossmoviereviews . Remember folks always support your local independent movie theater, independent video store, and independent filmmakers! It will keep horror alive………
You can always visit and see some past reviews, independent film news, or me ranting at: www.grossmoviereviews.com !!!
Don’t forget you can also hear Kyle Poling and me talking about horror flicks on a weekly basis on the Bloodbaths and Boomsticks podcast at http://bloodbathsandboomsticks.blogspot.com/ .
Plus you can always go to the greatest T-shirt place online or if you are in Texas visit the store of “Fast Custom Shirts” where T-shirt Joe is the only place that you can purchase a Gross Movie Reviews and Jagoff Massacre t-shirt but also Cannibal Campout, Woodchipper Massacre, and a Spookies T-shirts also!!!! Go to www.fastcustomshirts.com for details.
Help Bring “House of Oddities” to the Southside Works Cinema
0Hello!
As many of you know, last year I had the pleasure to work the folks who run Morose & Macabre’s Atrocity Exhibition on a feature length documentary that showcases the event as well as offers a peak behind the scenes at the performers/artists and how they work as a family to breathe life into the event each year.
Since the film had its initial screening at the Hollywood Theater back in November, it has gone on to win a Best Director Award at the 1st annual Horror Realm Film Festival and place 2nd in the Documentary Competition at the 19th Indie Gathering in Cleveland, OH.
We also have partnered up with Tugg.com, a theatrical on demand website that has the potential to give House of Oddities a national theatrical run.
I want to announce to you the very first of these tugg.com screenings which will only happen with your support. This screening will feature a brand new DCP transfer of the film at 2K resolution; the very same quality that Hollywood uses for its films.
Screening Info-
WHERE: South Side Works Cinema
425 Cinema Dr, Pittsburgh, PA 15203
WHEN: October 8th at 7pm
TICKETS: $9- Must be purchased through event page- http://www.tugg.com/events/10954
In order for this screening to happen 60 TICKETS MUST BE RESERVED BY SEPT 29th. So if you are unable to attend, please share this event with your friends, family, perfect strangers, basically anyone with ears and eyeballs.
You can find out more info about House of Oddities online at-
https://www.facebook.com/HouseOfOdditiesMovie
https://twitter.com/OdditiesFilm
As always thank you for your time and support for my projects. Let’s have on hell of a night on October 8th and get this film on the silver screen.
Sincerely,
Brian Cottington
grossmoviereviews 
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