Gross Movie Reviews #551
The Leopard Man (DVD) – This 1943 classic has a nightclub manager convince a model he is sweet on to walk during a dance routine with a leopard on a leash like it’s an everyday thing. Well the cat gets rattled by the dancer on purpose and escapes into the woods. Shortly after a young woman is found killed by this cat supposedly? This of course sets the town to fear the worst and lock themselves in until the cat is caught by authorities but club owner Manning believes it is something else not the cat? A fun black and white thriller worth the watch as I give it 3 stars.
Zombie Nightmare (DVD) – Adam West, Jon Mikl Thor, and Tia Carrere star in this 1987 feature that feels a few years older but has a young man play hero in a convenience store then be run down by a group of drunken young people. Mom not ready to let go of her son asks a favor of a friend down the road to use her voodoo to bring her son back to life. Doing so he returns to life or life of the undead to seek revenge on those who wronged him. If you like your horror features cheesy this is super cheesy as I give it 2 stars.
The Body Snatcher (DVD) – This wonderful 1945 feature has the likes of Boris Karloff and Bela Lugosi in a film that might be my new favorite of Karloff’s for mere reason his character and performance. The film is set 1831 Edinburgh where a doctor’s assistant learns from his teacher that fresh corpses are brought to them from the local graveyard by a mysterious cabbie who knows the doctor all too well. Mr. Fettes tries to ignore the weirdness between the good doctor and the cabbie Gray but involves himself when he takes an interest in a little girl that cannot walk but the good doctor is willing to try if there is a fresh corpse to study before surgery? Not a monster film unless you consider humans the monster as it shows how sinister humans can be for their own goals! Loved Boris Karloff’s performance as I put this with Vincent Price’s in ‘The House on Haunted Hill’ if you pay attention to that sort of thing as I give the film 4 stars.
Crypt of the Living Dead (DVD) – After an archeologist’s strange death, his son Chris comes to a small island that has a lot of superstitions of where his father was digging. Chris comes to bury him and decides it should be where this dig was but a tomb needs moved. When this is done Hannah the Queen of the Vampires is unleashed and night after night she gains strength willing each death of the superstitious villagers. Chris not exactly believing in the legend but knows something is weird wants to bury the tomb before any more deaths occur. A slow burn 1973 vampire flick that is worth a watch if you never heard of it as I give it 2 stars.
I Walked With a Zombie (DVD) – This 1943 thriller has a nurse sent from the states to a small island to take care of a man’s wife who is considered ‘mental’ for her coma-like state she has fallen into. It is believed by the doctor there that Mrs. Holland suffered a side effect of a high fever that has caused her to blankly stare like a zombie and not do much? The nurse falling in love with the husband but feels not all is being done to help the patient looks into the jungle for answers as the natives may know how to help the young lady in the coma-like trance as I give the film 2 stars.
Beyond the Valley of Belief Volume One and Two (Blu-ray) – Independent actor/writer/filmmaker Brian Papandrea, has issued a Blu-ray collection that has both titles of ‘Beyond the Valley of Belief’ that gives you around 2 ½ hours of Jonathan Fritz goodness! Jonathan Fritz is a TV host/former alcoholic who plans to take you through a few tales of Halloween darkness. When it is over you the viewer must decide if it was real or fake? Fritz starts off serious and the program comes off like Leonard Nimoy’s ‘In Search Of’ or even the 80s version of ‘Unsolved Mysteries’ (yes, I am old and remember these), but that all goes to hell when Fritz begins drinking during the broadcast. In these little stories you get stuff like a haunted cowboy which I really liked and a hilarious story called “Ghost Farts”. Brian does a wonderful job bringing to life the crude commercials, Fritz’s intros to the stories, and the script is brilliant from beginning to end for what he was trying to accomplish with this project. But the cherry on top is volume two where Brian continues everything including the Fritz character whose storyline has him on the run now and he wants to do a Christmas edition of the program! This event not only shows his downhill slide into depravity but Fritz is completely off the rails as he presents some Christmas horror tales on the run. Papandrea refuses to allow no budget to slow him down bringing back all the commercials and storylines of the first film into the second and it looked like lots of fun along the way! I always enjoy when an Indy filmmaker can give audiences something different, entertaining, and be passionate about it as this will not disappoint, for that Mr. Papandrea I have to give this double feature 3 ½ out of 4 stars as it can be found at https://rockbottomvideo.storenvy.com .
Chompy and the Girls (DVD) – If there wasn’t enough oddball weird horror films for 2021 there is this feature about a young woman trying to commit suicide but fails. Jackson is depressed and even she tries to reach out she fails at that too until she randomly texts a man who she just found out was her father six months ago. They agree to meet in a park for the first time and talk until they witness a man walk up to a girl and swallow her whole with his gigantic mouth! From there Jackson and father Sam are on the run as this thing on foot seems to track them down no matter where they go? It gets even weirder as they feel trap by this interdimension being they communicate with it and find out it isn’t the horrible parasite they thought it was but a being trying to save the world until Sam’s wife kills it. Now it is up too Jackson, Sam and Jackson’s friend who took a roofie to figure out what needs to be done. Movie is weird as balls and I loved it as I give it 3 stars.
George A. Romero Presents Deadtime Stories Volume One (DVD) – An anthology of films that are introduced to audiences by the zombie master himself George Romero who seems to have fun with each intro. First entry is about jungle cannibals, second is about a lonely finding something on a beach that was supposed to stay buried, and third is directed by Tom Savini that has a doctor making a house call for a teenage boy who seems to be dying? Fun little stories for horror fans that is shaped like your favorite old uncle is telling them to put you to sleep as I give this collection 2 stars.
Slumber Party Massacre (Remake/SyFy Channel) – The story begins in 1993 at a cabin where driller killer Russ Thorn attacks a group of young women just having a nice weekend. One woman survives the tragic ordeal and 28 years later has a daughter (Dana) who is about to partake in a weekend with the girls at a cabin near this event. Along the way we get a few images, music, lines of dialogue to pay homage to the original. But in this role reversal remake of young people being into crime podcasts and murder tours we find out the girls are there to see if Russ Thorn still exists? They have plans to put this legend to rest! Dana wants to do it for her mom and if that means putting the males across the lake in danger so be it. Now the role reversal thing is more the males are the victims and show nudity unlike the women in the original. But spoiler alert women fucked Thorn up in the original also so I wasn’t totally sure why this was part of the storyline other than to be filler? The only expectation I had going into this film was “don’t suck out loud”. It wasn’t terrible but I feel it will be forgettable for most young horror fans just because the original is lost on most as many may have never heard of it unlike: ‘Friday the 13th, Nightmare on Elm St., Hellraiser’, the usual suspects. They should have just made it “Slumber Party Massacre V” just to see what horror fan is actually paying attention to this besides me? Either way you knew I was watching it because it is a “massacre” film as I give it 2 stars.
V/H/S/94 (Shudder) – With the last entry leaving horror fans disappointed it seemed filmmakers went out of their way to give something extra to fans and it paid off. We begin with a SWAT team entering a warehouse where they were expecting to bust a huge drug ring but instead find TVs in different rooms and victims/dead bodies with their eyes ripped out in front of them. It almost looks like a cult-like suicide pact among the dead humans there. As the SWAT team goes floor to floor investigating they stop long enough for the viewer/us to watch a segment. We get a rat man segment, zombie segment, experimenting on humans segment which is just brutal fun, a militia segment where members are dying mysteriously, and the SWAT team is the wrap around as the viewer follows them through this maze of the bizarre. This film is so gory that it is almost cartoonish at times… The only bad thing about this wonderful horror flick is the wrap around, which is very unusual for any anthology film. The ending they give the wrap around just sucks and takes a little away from such a solid entry that more than made up for ‘V/H/S: Viral’. In the end I still enjoyed this near perfect anthology as I give it 3 ½ stars.
Inheritance (YouTube/DVD) – A newer film from a newer filmmaker Eric Palmer who has the task of telling a story about a woman inheriting a cabin. Scarlett just learns about her father dying and she has inherited this cabin and is already leaning towards selling it and being done with it. But after a couple girlfriends come over talking vacation they convince Scarlett with friends they should check it out? One problem, when they arrive at the cabin good old Uncle Drake is too pleasant on the young lady talking about selling the place and explains it has been in the family for a very long time. Scarlett very late into the film finds out Uncle Drake likes to conjure demons and needs young Scarlett for a sacrifice! A lot of times I am all for character development in an Indy film but this somehow had a little too much as they put on the back burner Uncle Drake runs a satanic cult that can conjure a demon? Just my opinion but felt the whole Uncle Drake arc should have been the main focus not Scarlett’s friends getting to know each other even more around the fire. I feel there was more of a story to tell about Uncle Drake to make this film a little different but again Eric was able to give the audience characters you actually feel something for as I give the flick 2 out of 4 stars.
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