Category Archives: Jagoff Massacre
Gross Movie Reviews #304
0Gross Movie Reviews #304
By Tim Gross
The Hard Corps (DVD) – Jean-Claude Van Damne plays a war vet back in the states and living at the VA hospital trying to get past his traumatic stress. A friend comes to visit with an offer he cannot refuse and it’s to help protect a local man who has capitalized on his boxing career into a business man who is building up his old community. Problem is the man has made an enemy of the local Hip Hop producer who he thought would be in jail for many years to come is out back on the streets and wants revenge. JCVD plays the ultimate bodyguard in this fun violent action flick that went mostly unnoticed a few years back. I give the flick 3 stars.
Big Ass Spider! (DVD/Theater) – This crazy monster flick is from the same guy that gave us the demon nouns in ‘The Convent’ which I believe is one of the best Halloween horror films and one of the better horror films the newer generation of horror filmmakers out there. Exterminator stubbles upon a major spider problem after going to the hospital after a spider bite. He makes a deal with the director to check out and resolve the spider issue if they clear his bill for services. The exterminator inspects what’s going on and soon understands that everyone is in trouble when a monstrous spider is quickly eating people and getting bigger every four hours inside the hospital until it breaks out. It is soon revealed the spider is a military experiment mistake. Now, with the spider increasing quickly, the military wants to drop bombs on L.A. before it is too late. A lot of famous cameos and a great performance by Ray Wise as an army major calling the shots make this monster film a fun one. I give the flick 3 stars.
Babysitter Massacre (DVD/Theater) – The never resting filmmaker Henrique Couto is back with his latest project that will make a lot of 80s and early 90s horror fans happy as this throwback slasher of sorts has lots of violence, chubby boobs, and a fun plot that makes fun but respects the genre. Couto blends fun characters into a plot of a babysitter club of teenage girls that several years ago always took care of each other until an unfortunate and tragic event happens to one of them on Halloween night. The club disbanded after that but one girl wants to have a party with all the old members of the club even if they hate or blame one of their own. But the strange faceless figure is back and some of the girls are not going to make the party as they are being killed one by one. Mr. Couto not only gives what the horror crowd of 80s wants but also keeps the plot interesting enough for today’s sometimes cynical horror movie fans. With that I give Mr. Couto’s film 3 out of 4 stars as he always strives to be one step ahead of the independent filmmaking world…
Satan’s Little Helper (DVD) – Jeff Lieberman directs this all too close to home horror film about a kid who wants to go trick or treating as a video game character named Satan’s Little Helper. The kid is excited about his older sister coming home from college to keep the tradition of trick or treating together alive. But when the big sister brings home her boyfriend the kid has a spaz attack and runs away to find a person dressed as Satan and the kid begins to hang with him or be his helper thinking it’s just like the video game. The kid believes it’s all in good Halloween fun with Satan killing people, stealing stuff, etc., until Satan kills his father when the kid gets upset. Intentional or not the film takes a look into children’s minds when they cannot decide between real life and video games in this creepy horror flick. The film came out 2004 and I believe its subject matter feels like it has been ripped out of the headlines now nine years later. What makes the film work is the Satan costume and how the character in the costume is portrayed in the film. It is brilliant. I only had a minor issue of the Satan character finding a way to make all think it is the boyfriend’s father who was in the costume but it’s only minor. ‘Satan’s Little Helper’ is a different and cool Halloween movie for fans to enjoy as I give it 3 ½ stars.
The Ballad of Skinless Pete (DVD) – Dustin Wayde Mills takes Re-Animator, The Resurrected, Croenberg’s The Fly, and Lovecraft elements and combines them into this amazing, wonderful, and beautiful film about a doctor that may have found a cure for cancer. Pete is Dr. Peel and is driven by an incredible sex drive and the need to find funding in what he believes could cure cancer with the help of his partner/roommate/friend Dr. Cross. Dr. Peel believes that enzymes taken from a certain worm and genetically altering them could be the cure, but they have run out of funding and guinea pigs. After an argument with Dr. Cross, Pete uses himself as the human test subject after finding out he has cancer. At first it works and he is cancer free but soon his body turns on him and eats his skin away. Weeks pass and Dr. Cross and their main investor go to check in on Dr. Peel only to find him half-crazed and possibly mutating into something this world has never imagined? But that isn’t the only thing happening as Dr. Peel craves flesh! The film is absolutely disgusting in a very beautiful way. The special effects are just amazing on an independent budget and actually are a character of the film. Dustin Wayde Mills may have made his best film yet… I give the flick 4 out of 4 stars and more can be found out about it at: www.facebook.com/dustin.w.mills or www.facebook.com/dustinmillsproductions . When watching the film I got two words for you, “Vagina Mace!”
The Pit and The Pendulum (DVD) – Stuart Gordon and Charles Band team up to produce this project originally called ‘The Inquisitor’ that was released in 1991 and still to this day is an underrated flick that has a great cast that includes the man, the myth, the legend Lance Henriksen as Torquemada. Torquemada is the Grand Inquisitor of Spain and is trying to purify the village of witchcraft. During a public death and whipping of a young boy a simple baker’s wife screams for the whipping to stop and throws herself in the way. About to be beaten by guards, Torquemada runs to her rescue only to be stunned by an image he takes as witchcraft and has her arrested so she can be tortured and give confession. Maria’s husband tries to explain her actions to Torquemada but to no avail they throw him out and threaten to throw him in prison. Undeterred the husband makes a bargain to get into the castle and save his wife while Torquemada takes upon himself to test her for witchcraft but believes he has been placed under her spell to love her and has himself flogged until the images or visions go away. Driven to the point of a psychotic break the Pope has sent someone to the castle to explain to Torquemada the torturing must stop and the witch hunt must be done. A great time period horror flicks that all it was missing is the Hammer Films name at the beginning and Vincent Price character. One of the best early Full Moon films to be produced as I give it 3 ½ stars.
The Tingler (DVD) – A great example of horror films from back in the 50s from William Castle that actually made a film about a thing that comes from the spine of all humans that can only be stopped by people screaming in fear. The film is quite dated and loses its luster for most film fans that were not there when the film was originally produced and the experience of their seats being rigged with electric shock to make them jump out of their seat during the screening. Vincent Price plays a good doctor trying to stop the Tingler. ‘The Tingler’ is another film that remind movie fans why Vincent Price was the perfect genre actor. I give the flick 3 stars.
Bath Salt Zombies (DVD) – Another independent film from Dustin Wayde Mills who plays a chemist/drug dealer named Bubbles who has come up with a new batch of “super bath salts” drug for the public. The guinea pig is a junkie named Richie. Richie after being supplied a free sample of the new drug goes back to a friend’s house to smoke it. Once he does he becomes a raging cannibal and eats his friend’s face. Meanwhile a DEA agent is determined to stop the new “super bath salts” by any means necessary. Even it means fighting the same gang member 25 times during a raid. But is the DEA agent too late as Richie is hooked and a couple of his friends go on a feeding frenzy at a concert! The film is exactly what you think but stays away from the zombie moniker and is more of a raging cannibal thing. I give the film 3 out of 4 stars and more about it can be found at www.facebook.com/dustinmillsproductions .
Super Task Force One (DVD) – This film is a film made out of love for the ‘Power Rangers’ show by an intelligent filmmaker Steve Rudzinski. The film being written and directed by Steve had my attention even if it wasn’t a horror movie. ‘Super Task Force Six’ apparently was a group of colorful superheroes who fought aliens, monsters, demons and evil of all sorts until the evil disappeared 15 years ago and the government disbanded the group. Jason a struggling writer just happens to stumble upon a beaten man at a park who gives Jason the power of the Green Enforcer. And Jason now is taken over by the power only to fight a hideous monster at the park trying to destroy him. Soon Jason learns with the help of Super Task Force super fan and best friend Paul that the Evil Emperor is alive and well and has kept the public in a trance. A trance from an audio file found by Jason’s cute girlfriend and destroyed for the world to know there is evil still here. I am no Power Rangers fan at all but found the independent kids friendly film to be very entertaining and it helped jar my memory of the good old days of Saturday morning TV. Steve should be proud of this project for the reason he took a chance by going through with this project and has done an exceptional job with it. I give the flick 3 out of 4 stars and if you are looking for something of a different pace than you’re run of the mill mindless mainstream film go buy this entertaining flick at www.supertaskforce.com and check out www.facebook.com/supertaskforce for updates.
Blood Orgy at Beaver Lake (DVD) – Mike Hartman and the Silver Bullet Pictures gang is at it again in their latest gross out adventure about a doctor… Dr. Bung to be exact that has combined ecstasy, Viagra, and cocaine to make the ultimate drug called “69”. Soon Dr. Bung is being by two woman hitmen because he hasn’t tested it on humans yet and his boss wants out there for the masses now! While the women hitman try to get rid of the body and the drug they lose it only to have two rednecks find it. The rednecks spread it around like moonshine and no one is safe at Beaver Lake as they begin to slaughter and fuck everything and everyone they can get their hands on. I give the flick 2 out of 4 stars and can be found at www.silverbulletpictures.com .
Germ Z (DVD) – A military satellite is knocked out of orbit screaming towards earth after a meteor hits it. The satellite lands in the mountains of a very small town where the military explains stay away until they get there to survey the crash. Even with the firefighters staying away and containing the forest fire they soon become sick and begin changing. Once changed, the victims become raging cannibals until their brains eventually explode for no reason. The small town is under attack and it’s all up to the young sheriff to stop the raging cannibals in this low budget bloodbath that just happened to be released by Fangoria Magazine. I give the film 2 ½ stars.
Out of One’s Misery (DVD/internet) – Filmmaker Michael Sharpe puts together a creepy and cool short film about a man named David. He may be haunted, he may not, he may be insane, and he may have already gone insane and is coming back to reality? Whatever it is Mr. Sharpe gives you a short film thriller that will have you at the edge of your seat as I give it 3 out of 4 stars. Found out more about this project and more at www.facebook.com/sharpeedgefilms .
Any comments or questions please send to: GrossMovieReview@verizon.net, GrossMovieReview@aol.com or www.facebook.com/grossmoviereviews . Remember folks always support your local independent movie theater, independent video store, and independent filmmakers! It will keep horror alive………
You can always visit and see some past reviews at: www.grossmoviereviews.com !!!
Also you now can purchase the co-directed project from Daniel Boyd and myself called, “Jagoff Massacre” at www.jagoffmassacre.com
Don’t forget you can also hear Kyle Poling and I talking about horror flicks on a weekly basis on the Bloodbaths and Boomsticks podcast at http://bloodbathsandboomsticks.blogspot.com/
Plus you can always go to the greatest T-shirt place online or if you are in Texas visit the store of “Fast Custom Shirts” where T-shirt Joe is the only place that you can purchase a Gross Movie Reviews t-shirt but also Cannibal Campout, Woodchipper Massacre, and Spookies T-shirts also!!!! Go towww.fastcustomshirts.com for details.
I’ll see yinz at Jagoff Massacre tonight!
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Gross Movie Reviews #300
0Gross Movie Reviews #300
By Tim Gross
Bleed (DVD) – A film that was released in 2002 under the Shadow Films label aka Full Moon Pictures that stars the beyond talented Debbie Rochon as a woman named Maddy who is the new girl in the office after a tragic murder of one its members recently happened. Soon Maddy becomes a suspect of other office workers being murdered after she is told a fake story of “The Murder Club” where each member works its way up to murder in order to be part of this exclusive club. The film seems like a cut and dry modern slasher but has enough twists and turns to keep even the most hardcore horror fan interested in this low budget fare. What also makes the film fun to watch are cameos by Brinke Stevens and Lloyd Kaufman playing Maddy’s parents when they were younger! Awesome shit! It is very rare to see Mr. Kaufman in a straight role, as many times you catch him in a very low budget independent film, “insert title here” being himself and pumping up the film and Troma for 30 seconds. Plus, it’s cool to see most likely the office used is the Full Moon offices as you can clearly see ‘Curse of Puppet Master’ and a ‘Parasite’ poster in the hallway among many others. I give the flick 3 stars.
Witchouse (DVD) – Directed by David Decoteau in 1999 is not a mere ‘Night of the Demons’ throw away but more of a fun horror romp that may have taken a cue or two from Tinney’s masterpiece on a much smaller budget. The supposedly creepy college girl Elizabeth has invited friends to a party that just happens to be a ritual she is performing to bring back an evil witch named Lilith. The friends soon learned they are not just there to get drunk and bang like bunny rabbits. They are all decedents of those who burned Lilith at the stake. A cool alternate horror film pick when looking for films to watch on a rainy weekend. I give the flick 2 ½ stars.
Witchouse 2: Blood Coven (DVD) – A year after the first film, J.R. Bookwalter directed this sequel that was hugely influenced by ‘Blair Witch Project’ that was white hot at the time. An old house is being destroyed to make room for a new shopping mall and some remains have been found on the property. Some college students and their professor are invited to the site to investigate and soon find out that remains may belong to a famous witch named Lilith and her friends or coven. When trying to get a DNA sample the professor cuts herself and almost instantly becomes possessed by the spirit of the evil witch and begins her killing spree. Not a great follow up but has a couple highlights: Jeff Burr appearance as a man on the street asked about witches and Andrew Prine as a man who is a witch hunter. Prine’s character explains the town made a pact with Lilith and her coven hundreds of years ago when a plague hit. And now they are back to start their coven again. I give the flick 1 ½ stars.
Witchouse 3: Demon Fire (DVD) – This film was again filmed a year later and by J.R. Bookwalter also where this time Bookwalter and crew take a totally different approach to the Lilith witch legend and throws in a good cast in Debbie Rochon, Tina Krause, Brinke Stevens, and Tanya Dempsey for good measure. This may the best of the three films as Debbie Rochon and best friend played by Tina Krause are making a documentary about witches and witch related things and to see if witchcraft is real? Debbie’s sister played by Tanya Dempsey has a falling out with her boyfriend and they all decide to do a séance, coven circle, whatever you wanna call it as Debbie’s character wants it for her documentary. She reads from a fake book of spells and says a few lines but a pissed off Lilith played by Brinke Stevens shows up and has plans of her own. Weird shit continues to happen to the three women after the weird event and keeps you the viewer on your toes of whether Lilith actually exists or not. Great low budget flick worth rewatching again as I give 3 stars.
Goobers! (DVD) – The film was originally released in 1997 as ‘Mystery Monsters’ where Charles Band began a line of kid’s films in the 90s when things at Full Moon was going great. The film was recently rereleased under a new name ‘Goobers!’ Apparently, the drunk Happ Abby from the ‘Trancers’ films plays an asshole Cap’n Mike in a kid’s puppet show where the three puppets move around like they have a life of its own? Cap’n Mike went to a different dimension which is not explained and steals these monsters, goobers, puppets… whatever you wanna call them off of an evil woman that will stop at nothing to imprison them again. The evil woman is known as Executive Producer Mara. It’s a kid’s film so keep that in mind when watching it. A new kid is on set and has yet to hit puberty because when they do Cap’n Mike gets rid of them. But this new kid is very curious about the supernatural monsters and learns they are being kept against their will and vows to help them. A great flick for hardcore Full Moon fans to seek out. I give it 3 stars.
Shandar the Shrunken City (DVD) – Another Full Moon film that is now under Charles Band’s Moonbeam Films label and was released under a different title in 1998 “The Shrunken City”. Two kids named George and Lori go searching around a construction site where George believes he found something cool there. When they go searching they just happen to find a shrunken city in a globe that just so happens to have live people in it that have been sleeping for the last 26,000 years and on the run from some assassins called the OOD! But years ago the bootleg ‘Krull’ creatures aka robot extras from ‘Dollman’ aka used monster masks from Full Moon’s ‘Oblivion’ found the peaceful city of Shandar and tried to destroy it. In hopes of a better future the inhabitants decided to shrink the city and were not able to be found until now. With the power source lost and the OOD hot the trail of Shandar it is up to George and Lori to save them from the OOD and find the power source so the city expands to its original size and destroy their small town. I give the kid’s flick 2 ½ stars.
Night at the Magic Museum (DVD) – Another Full Moon film that has been rereleased recently that was originally called, ‘Mystery Museum’ in 1999. The story begins in 1632 where a sorcerer imprisons some evil dudes in a painting as they were about to destroy a village for the “Jewel of Polaris”. Hundreds of years later the painting just happens to be in a museum where a young lady named Kim works at and she just happens to have her younger brother Ben with her and during a stormy night at the museum lightning opens a portal between the painting and our world sending them to 1632. Ben and Kim need the help of their little sister back in present time and some help from the villagers to make sure the evil dudes don’t kill them before they find the “Jewel of Polaris”. Not as good as the other Moonbeam Film releases but if you are going to have a Full Moon film weekend you got to include the ones most people don’t know about as I give this film 1 ½ stars.
Decadent Evil (DVD) – A disappointing horror film starring Phil Fondacaro as Ivan the vampire hunter who tracks down a lady head vamp named Morella to a strip club called, “Visions”. The strippers are all vamps and use the club to feed and help Morella get 10000 souls. If she accomplishes this goal she can become immortal. The film is 65 minutes long and between the flashbacks of the film ‘Vampire Journals’ and random footage of strippers, and credits you may have 30 minutes of an actual horror movie. Not even the cool puppet named Marvin that just so happens to be the father of Ivan the vampire hunter will keep you interested in this mess! I give the film 1 star.
Decadent Evil 2 (DVD) – The sequel to very disappointing vampire flick of the same name picks up a year or so later where the vamp stripper Sugar and her boyfriend are searching for a way to change Marvin back to normal. What makes the film insulting is Mr. Band gets a bootleg Phil Fondacaro aka Ricardo Gill to play an undead Ivan the vampire hunter who just happens to be carried around in a suitcase. Apparently, Sugar and her boyfriend find another strip club that just happens to have another head vamp going for 10000 souls. Honestly, this film is crap and that is the best way to say it. I give it 1 star.
Dangerous Worry Dolls (DVD) – A Full Moon film that is about a woman named Eva who is in a women’s detention center and just trying to do her time and get out and starting over. Of course the long term inmates have taken a liking to Eva and trying to force her to be their drug mule, plus she has been harassed by a coked up security officer. But Eva’s daughter during visiting day gives her a present: Worry Dolls. Supposedly the legend is you put the small figures under your pillow at night and they take all your worries away. Eva does this that night and feels 100% better the next day. But Eva doesn’t understand she is becoming possessed by the Worry Dolls that make her break a woman’s arm in three places and wants to start trouble for those who made her life miserable inside the detention center. Or as I like to describe this film: Charles Band remakes ‘Reform School Girls’! I give the film 2 ½ stars.
Gangsters, Guns, and Zombies (DVD) – A UK zombie film that revolves five thugs who just happen to rob a bank when a zombie apocalypse breaks out and we have running zombies everywhere. Most of the film is spent with the thugs mostly driving a countryside looking for a safe house and getting attacked by zombies every time they make a stop. Nothing new happens in the film but have a feeling zombie fans will be more than happy to add another sub-par zombie film to their collections as I give it 1 ½ stars.
World Gone Wild (VHS) – Another little known late 80s film that is set in 2087 and apparently Bruce Dern and Catherine Mary (Night of the Comet fame) Stewart help a small village called “Lost Wells” go 75 years after the major war started and almost wiped out humanity. With a new threat of a man who brainwashes young men into his religion and tries to seek more in the wastelands, Dern decides it is time to go the ruins called the city in order to find an old friend in Michael Pare to help him save his peaceful village. Another film that makes you wonder who in Hollywood actually knows what they are doing as another cool film with a little help would most likely have found its audience in 1988. I give the apocalyptic flick 3 stars.
Any comments or questions please send to: GrossMovieReview@verizon.net, GrossMovieReview@aol.com or www.facebook.com/grossmoviereviews . Remember folks always support your local independent movie theater, independent video store, and independent filmmakers! It will keep horror alive………
You can always visit and see some past reviews at: www.grossmoviereviews.com !!!
You can purchase my latest book from Library of the Living Dead Press called, “The Big Ass Book of Gross Movie Reviews” at www.amazon.com .
Don’t forget you can also hear Kyle Poling and I talking about horror flicks on a weekly basis on the Bloodbaths and Boomsticks podcast at http://bloodbathsandboomsticks.blogspot.com/
Plus you can always go to the greatest T-shirt place online or if you are in Texas visit the store of “Fast Custom Shirts” where T-shirt Joe is the only place that you can purchase a Gross Movie Reviews t-shirt but also Cannibal Campout, Woodchipper Massacre, and Spookies T-shirts also!!!! Go towww.fastcustomshirts.com for details.
One more thing… Don’t forget Jagoff Massacre is coming September 20th, 2013 at Horror Realm. Stay tuned for details at https://www.facebook.com/JagoffMassacre !!!
Jagoff Massacre will be invading Horror Realm September 20th!!!
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Don’t forget midnight Friday, then screening a second time at 7:20pm Saturday evening the 21st!
Gross Movie Reviews #299
0Gross Movie Reviews #299
By Tim Gross
The Island of Dr. Moreau (DVD/Remake) – This is the film adaption from 1977 starring Burt Lancaster as Dr. Moreau. Now, it’s not exactly the best film but it is better than that abomination that starred Marlon Brando and Val Kilmer in the 90s. Plus, I always had a soft spot in my heart for this one just because I liked the creatures in it. You know the story a man (Michael York) is shipwrecked on an island where its dwellers or neither exactly man or beast except for Dr. Moreau, his bodyguard, and a beautiful woman played by Barbara Carrera who you are not entirely sure if she is completely human? The half beast half human creatures which look awesome for 1977 have rules that have been taught by Dr. Moreau who isolated himself from the world since no one understands his genetic research. The film is a little dated but still carries the message of “if you play god, you are bound to get fucking lynched by your creations”… Like I said cool creatures, story never gets old, and Val Kilmer is nowhere to be seen. I give the film 2 ½ stars.
The Vagrant (DVD) – A little known film from the late 80s that stars Bill Paxton as up and coming preppie guy who buys a house and has big plans. Problem is Paxton’s character doesn’t know about the disfigured hobo that breaks into his house to eat shit out of his sink. Paxton’s character starts to get so freaked out by the experience not only does he begin to sleep walk, he dreams of the bum played by genre vet Marshall Bell fucking with him And eventually trying to kill him. While Paxton’s girlfriend leaves him, Michael Ironside head detective doesn’t believe his story of the psychotic bum, and his best friend starting to believe his friend is crazy, Paxton gets a shitload of security installed to his home and becomes super obsessed with the hobo! A great “WTF” film that was mostly overlooked at the time for the mere reason that you can’t really put in a category of what it is except for its weird and has a somewhat of a somber and unexciting ending. But do not let that stop you from seeking this hidden gem out and enjoying it for what it is… entertaining. I give it 2 ½ stars.
The Warriors (DVD) – A film that became famous and influence quite a few films over the years about summit for all the gangs in New York to meet in the Bronx. The Warriors got to travel a long way as they are from Coney Island. Once there the man that has brought all the gangs together is killed and The Warriors are wrongly blamed for the murder. Now it’s up to The Warriors to protect themselves not only from police but up to 20,000 other gang members out for their heads and might be their last fight if they don’t make it back to Coney Island. With their leader killed during the commotion, it’s up to Swan to get his gang back home. Along the way you have a radio DJ that narrates the film without narrating as she keeps score as The Warriors blow up cars, bust heads, and knock down some police officers to make their way home. A fun film that sums up late 70s New York and still hasn’t lost its edge when watching it over 30 years later. I give the film 4 stars.
Vengeance is a 44. Magnum (DVD) – As always the hardest working independent filmmaker Robert Elkins never rests as he releases his latest feature film that goes away from the horror genre where he seemed so comfortable with. This time around he gives us more of a grindhouse independent revenge flick. The film follows a character named Christi, a prostitute who owes money to a wannabe thug mobster who sends his underlings after her and threatening her life. Christi of course tries to make a run for it and along the way runs into a young woman from Farmville who was duped by a fake talent agency and was mugged shortly after. Once the underlings catch up with Christi and kill the girl from Farmville they torture Christi and cut out her tongue (which looked awesome). But before they can finish off Christi, a wheelchair bound war vet saves her and eventually trains her for her revenge against the thugs. I have loved Robert Elkins films over the years and feel he is a great independent filmmaker. But I feel this film has just been done one too many times and feel he decided to do this project a little too late. After last year’s “Revenge is Her Middle Name”, it seemed like the independent filmmaking world was changing again and leaving the grindhouse-style flick behind. But what else didn’t help was I felt the film ran too long and the girl from Farmville angle took up too much time to only have her killed off. It felt random and did not fit into the plot? I did enjoy the tongue cutting scene and enjoyed seeing the camera in the reflection of the hair dryer of the bus stop bathroom intentional or not. I don’t deny the passion of Robert Elkins I just feel his better work is in horror not grindhouse/exploitation. I give the film 2 out of 4 stars. You can find out more at https://www.facebook.com/VengeanceIsA44Magnum and https://www.facebook.com/robert.elkins.5?fref=ts .
Evil Dead (DVD/Remake) – Yes folks, I did finally convince myself to sit down and watch this film. Being a big fan of the original three films it took me awhile to convince myself to watch it. Hell, I honestly thought it would never be remade! But when it became reality I watched the trailers and really thought the film looked creepy as hell. But once finished with watching the film I wasn’t so much disappointed as much as ‘ok’… Don’t get me wrong it is one of the gorier mainstream horror films in recent years but there was no creepiness in the film that I felt with the trailers. And we are talking I was gonna act like the movie never exist but I gave it a chance. The twitchy possessed people just didn’t give it that familiar feel of the original and felt at times the filmmaker tried to do too much like Raimi-style camerawork when there is only one person that can do that and that is Sam Raimi himself. For the most part it is like the original film but just felt like the soul of the original can never be recaptured. The film itself didn’t anger me at all. The film is ok, I was glad I got to watch it but my only problem with the film as I have said many times from the outset is I do not believe it will be memorable like the original but also gave me this horrible feeling like Mr. Raimi and his two henchmen collected a paycheck and do not care what happens next? Now, that can be petty on my part, I will admit, but I am at the point that I may not want to see a part four any longer… If you liked it, more power to you. Only thing I ask of you is come find me in five or six years and let’s see if you still like as much as when you first seen it. I doubt you will. There is something about the original that just can’t be duplicated. I give the film 2 stars.
Blue Collar (YouTube) – A very much underrated film that concerns union relations and the common man working at a taxi plant in Detroit in 1977. The film has an all-star cast in: Richard Pryor, Harvey Keitel, Yaphet Kotto, Cliff De Young, and Ed Begley Jr. And there is a lot drinking of Stroh’s throughout the film. Three men who seem to be best friends get an idea in their head that they can rob the union office for cash since all three seem to be broke and in need of money. They get the plan together and go one night and rob their union office only to find $600 and some change and a notebook. The notebook contains loans to Las Vegas at high interest rates. Things escalate from there as the three try to figure how to use this to their advantage. This film is brilliant as it starts off first as a comedy and then becomes a serious drama as it takes you inside of what it was like between unions, their members, and the big car making industry. This film shows Richard Pryor wasn’t this just one of the greatest comedians of all time but proved he could be a great actor if he wanted to be? I was surprised how cool and brilliant this film was as I have to give four stars.
2020: An American Nightmare (DVD) – I was warned this Travis Bowen directed independent film was bad but of course I didn’t listen and had to witness it for myself. Now, it helps even Mr. Bowen himself says, “it is bad” and knows his first feature in 2005 was filled many pitfalls and mistakes that he has learned from and continues to learn from in order to make better films as he has over the past several years since. The independent film has a great cast in Joe Estevez, Conrad Brooks, Lloyd Kaufman, Denise Duff, Dean Haglund, Amy Lynn Best, and Tom Tully. But the big mistake was blending these celebs from the convention scene and trying to blend it in with the film plot at hand and the plot is a strange infection has hit America and the president wants to move to Canada in order to lay waste to his own land in order to rid the world of the deadly virus. Aka a nuclear wave is coming… Like many independent films that use celebs at the conventions to pump up their cast and film, “sounds good on paper, but doesn’t translate well on the big screen or the straight-to-DVD” in this case. I give Mr. Bowen credit for thinking big and being passionate enough to make it, but also still having the balls to sell a bad film. Travis you earned my respect. And believe me your first film may be bad as many others are but remember I have seen a lot worse… “The Christmas Season Massacre” just to name one! I give the film a ½ star out of four just for having the balls to sell the film knowing you have done better with recent projects. If interested check out Mr. Bowen and company at www.eeriefrequency.com and https://www.facebook.com/travis.bowen.522?fref=ts .
The Wild Hunt (DVD) – The film begins with this elaborate sequence of fantasy and mythology as a woman is brought into a village where many men scream and shriek with delight as she has been brought to their leader Murlagh, so he may ravage her. Great opening scene that makes it even that much better when it cuts to another sequence where a character named Magnus questions his king and challenges him to a duel for the crown and there you learn its “LARPERS” or “Larping”. People who enjoy what is called, “live-action-role-play”. You perhaps have a brother, a cousin; someone you know most likely has done this? Well filmmaker Alexandre Franchi for his first feature-length film takes you head first into the larping world. The film was mostly shot on location at a role-playing village built in Quebec. The story revolves around a young man named Erik who has just been left by his girlfriend Lyn to go larping and Erik is left in limbo trying to take care of his sick father. Once Lyn is off on her own adventure we learn Erik has an older brother named Magnus who hasn’t been around since their sick father has come home and is huge into larping. Erik keeps having nightmares of his ex-girlfriend Lyn and decides to run to the mountains and save her from the larping scene. The drama plays out as Erik struggles with Magus’s world he firmly believes in and finds a common goal of rescuing the princess aka Lyn and surprise attack the evil larpers aka Murlagh and friends. The brothers begin to find each other again and Magnus agrees to even visit dad but that is all over quick when Murlagh goes nutzoid and others decide they want their world to become all too real as they go on “The Wild Hunt”. Franchi brilliantly blends together the real world and larping and shows respect to those who enjoy it. He crafts a must see drama of when someone’s jealously goes a little too far. Not to mention the great subplots of Erik and Magnus’s father and Lyn: is she bi-polar, a whore, just a plain cunt? This film has some great layers to it that has an ending that many horror fans would applaud! I give the film 4 stars.
Any comments or questions please send to: GrossMovieReview@verizon.net, GrossMovieReview@aol.com or www.facebook.com/grossmoviereviews . Remember folks always support your local independent movie theater, independent video store, and independent filmmakers! It will keep horror alive………
You can always visit and see some past reviews at: www.grossmoviereviews.com !!!
You can purchase my latest book from Library of the Living Dead Press called, “The Big Ass Book of Gross Movie Reviews” at www.amazon.com .
Don’t forget you can also hear Kyle Poling and I talking about horror flicks on a weekly basis on the Bloodbaths and Boomsticks podcast at http://bloodbathsandboomsticks.blogspot.com/
Plus you can always go to the greatest T-shirt place online or if you are in Texas visit the store of “Fast Custom Shirts” where T-shirt Joe is the only place that you can purchase a Gross Movie Reviews t-shirt but also Cannibal Campout, Woodchipper Massacre, and Spookies T-shirts also!!!! Go towww.fastcustomshirts.com for details.
One more thing… Don’t forget Jagoff Massacre is coming September 20th, 2013 at Horror Realm. Stay tuned for details at https://www.facebook.com/JagoffMassacre !!!
A cell phone pic I took of us setting up the sword fight gag for “Jagoff Massacre”
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Horror Realm… less than one week away horror movie fans!
0Ok horror fans four reasons why you should come to this event: 1) Sandy Stuhlfire does one hell of a job coordinating Horror Realm year and year out! 2) Rich Dalzotto does a great job on bringing in great guests us fans want on a budget. 3) Michelle Linhart does a wonderful job behind the scenes of Horror Realm. 4) The vendors, press, etc. have all been wonderful for every Horror Realm convention so far… So horror fans, zombie fans, horror writers, fans of the weird in general come support, have fun, spread the word about the event and thank these three people for putting together something awesome every six months! www.horrorrealmcon.com
Its about 65% finished and we hope to have a trailer at Horror Realm
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Hello horror fans and welcome to the official Gross Movie Reviews website!
0Welcome horror peeps! Yes it took me awhile but we all get busy. Between writing reviews, co-directing Jagoff Massacre, starting to put together a new book, and trying to work the real full time job it can take up all my time.
I’m here!!! Yes, the website is a little different Bastards of Horror… It may not be as professional looking right now, but as I learn on the fly how to do things and get a little money for it it will improve over time. But this is the official Gross Movie Reviews website that has been in the back of my mind for awhile but just never really thought it was the right time for it yet, and now it is!
But first thank you all for the support and thank you to all the filmmakers who sent me screeners during the time I didn’t have a website. Horror movie fans nothing will change:
I will post my reviews again…
I will post independent film news, press releases, etc.
I will still post all the Full Moon news!
I will post movie pics, posters, etc.
So now that it is done, keep coming back to visit, grab a beer (maybe me one also) and enjoy.
Remember folks always support your local independent movie theater, independent video store, and independent filmmakers! It will keep horror alive………
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