Gross Movie Reviews #694

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Transylvania Tapes (DVD) – Latest project from the talented independent soul Brad Sykes takes us to Bucharest! A dramatic horror found footage/documentary mash up that follows a young woman Mara was born in Romania but moved to L.A. when she was very young. After a family member died in the past year she found tapes of what her mother made in 1997 looking for a possible family property but disappeared mysteriously. Mara travels across the world to make a documentary about her following in her mother’s footsteps to also hopefully find some answers. Mara’s mother was an actress and in theater during the 80s and was very popular in the area as she uses this to help track down some old peers of her mother’s to interview. As Mara gets deep with some of these interviews a curse is mentioned several times which of course Mara refuses to listen to warnings about looking for her mother. The film is quite intriguing and beautiful as this somewhat found footage film comes off genuine compared to many from the past. What also helps this project along is the actor that plays Mara; Valeria Badiuc absolutely has a natural charm that lures you in to be interested in her journey. Now I was a little upset Charles Band or his castle were not in the film and the film runs a little long for me at 109 minutes but Ms. Badiuc’s performance and Mr. Sykes using the beautiful landscape and buildings as a character itself lends this to be a must watch independent film in 2026! I give this light mash up 3 out of 4 stars.

Coven of the Black Cube (Blu-ray) – There was all kinds of cool people from the independent genre that show up in this old school no budget vibe kind of flick. The film revolves a young woman questioning her relationship as she meets the head of a coven named Clover who legit seems to have real concern for the young woman VI. Clover actually sees potential in VI in allowing her into her witchy life for better understanding of what can be better than what she has become accustomed too. The only thing VI doesn’t know is Clover takes great pleasure in helping women kill their husbands/boyfriends with a potion she has come up with. The story at its core is all about Clover being a serial killer with this witchery stuff as the background that is mixed into a very perverse love story that wasn’t meant to be as I give it 3 out of 4 stars.

Blood Oath (DVD) – A Troma release from 2011 that has friends who tell a story about an urban legend then go looking for it to see if it is at all true? The slim backstory is that a deranged child lives in the woods looking for victims that come to this cabin. Of course said group of friends find the cabin and slowly they are slaughtered by this hulking deranged killer. Not a ton to this bare bones slasher film but also might be why not many of seek it out for a watch as I can only give it 2 out of 4 stars.

Zombies of the Third Reich (Tubi) – It is war time and the Nazis are under extreme pressure by their relentless leader to create super soldiers in some unknown French bunker! Problem is the bunker has gone quiet recently as the Allies were keeping tabs and fear the worst as they send in a recon/rescue team to get one of their own out. The special team gets in quickly but soon understands getting in was never the problem as getting out will be as the Nazi experiment cannot get out in the real world. Believe me you read about this film and will wanna see it and hope it’s even a fraction of ‘Dead Snow’ or ‘Outpost’ but it doesn’t even come close. The film from the beginning fails from poor execution or just plain laziness of getting this project together. Not so much of the characters but everything around them. If you watch you’ll understand and want to forget it as quickly as you chose to watch it as I give it a ½ star.

Island Escape (Tubi) – A team of mercenaries is dropped onto a mysterious island to rescue a scientist where an unknown experiment has been going on for decades. Once the team arrives they immediately find some mysterious but monstrous foes that seem hell bent on attacking the team. In a short span of time the team figures out they have been dropped into an insane wormhole experiment that resets the island every three days and they cannot escape the ongoing experiment. As time quickly goes by the team understands there is multiple versions of them on the island and it’s endless. I enjoyed the concept of this film but it gets a little murky in the middle as it seems to have a tough time of how they wanted to resolve this wormhole issue they were in but still give it 2 stars for being interesting.  

The Creeps (Amazon) – So some old creepy Russian guy opens a portal to a dimension where demons float out to infest snowmen at Finnish ski resort! Sounds corny, sounds like you have seen this ten times before but I advise you have not kids. Now enters our main character Zach who is 17 at said ski resort with a friend (raises way too many questions but that is for a whole other conversation that you will have to ignore that plot point to enjoy this film) who has a love for the 80s nostalgia. The movie wastes no time as the creatures attack a party that Zach and friends attend as Zach hides in an outhouse/porta potty to talk to his Grandpa Joe Dante! Once Zach comes out of hiding the movie shifts into high gear of chaos, blood, and Christopher Lambert with Highlander references that will simply blow your mind in this most entertaining piece of cinema! Kids this project is 4 stars all the way so yinz need to seek it out immediately as Christopher lets us know one more time, “there can only be one”.

Final Caller (Blu-ray) – I still stand by this review but it was time to go check out the Blu-ray version of this film as I feel this is one of the more under the radar projects of Mr. Sheets’ career. The Blu-ray comes with a great BTS segment of Todd just being down to earth and explaining what was going on in his life while this project was going on, there is a commentary of course, and a short film ‘The Request’. Also too it just felt like Todd was trying something out of his comfort zone… : Todd Sheets fresh off the killer ‘Bonehill Road’ and the over the top ‘Clownado’ is back with an ultra-low budget film that involves a shock jock and his show “On Through the Night” where he tells strange stories and takes calls. For Roland the shock jock tonight seems like any other night of doing his show where he is yelling into the mic putting down his fans and spewing conspiracies. But his soon to be ex-wife shows up with the divorce papers and a caller called “The Outsider” who is going to fulfill some kind of ancient ritual by brutally murdering young women. The caller claims it is up to Roland to stop him from being a serial killer but of course Roland takes this as some kind rubbish and hangs up. This begins a hellish downward spiral for the show and all involved as “The Outsider” keeps calling back to yell back at Roland and explain how he devours his victims as he kills them and will visit Roland to complete the ritual. Roland now finds himself in world of crazy shit as he is trying to escape his own radio show and not become part of the bloody body count of “The Outsider”. This is a straight forward gore and even more extreme gore Todd Sheets project that will have his fans screaming for a sequel as I give it 3 ½ out of 4 stars.

Saurians 2 (Tubi) – Mark Polonia’s son Anthony takes over the reins for the sequel 30 years later to tell the story of a dinosaur or two rising from a mountain in Fossil Valley. It seems the dinosaurs have awaken again and this time around a duo called “Crypto Duo” are not just in the area to interview survivor Alan about his ordeal but to also investigate the new occurrences. There is a lot of filler to this short feature but eventually the duo finds themselves transported into a long lost world debating what should be done with the dinosaurs. If I am being completely honest here this feels like something Mark and Anthony were paid straight up to put out there for content more than giving a strong sequel? It feels like pieces of stock footage from other projects strung together with maybe a few new scenes with the Alan character. It isn’t terrible, I just feel fans would have wanted more since it’s a sequel to a Polonia dinosaur project that fans may have forgotten as I can only give this 1 out of 4 stars.

Pickaxe (DVD) – Well this is a sloppy sex-filled monstrous slasher film that was entertaining as hell. It is 1988 and after a naked blood soaked sacrifice a crazed undead serial killer has returned from the grave to continue his carnage in Woodland Hills. Two people survived the first go around with Alex Black as now one is a cop (A. Michael Baldwin) and the second is drunken crazed person (Tiffany Shepis) that burned down an asylum a year after being committed. These two must answer the call as a group of supposed teenagers have traveled to a cabin near Woodland Hills for a drug induced drunken loud sex before heading to a concert. Alex Black the monstrous mess he is wastes no time hacking off heads and ripping out hearts because an evil amulet he wears. Yeah this blood soaked slasher has its flaws but the chemistry between Baldwin and Shepis’ characters as them not just being cameos help you oversee the flaws of this adventure. This picture also could have used a Matt Cannon for a better score. You may not enjoy the lackluster ending but again this was quite entertaining horror fans and yinz need to seek it out as I give it 3 stars.

One Million Babes BC (Tubi) – This Mark Polonia adventure made me laugh several times throughout the picture. Not sure that was the intention but I see it for what it was and just had fun watching two visitors discover a cave to tell the story that was written on the walls by the first people who could stand and have independent thought. These individuals read the drawings and tell the story of Luna and Ogg who are the superiors of a tribe who are at odds with each other. At some point Ogg feels threaten by Luna and feels she should be sacrificed to the volcano gods to help their tribe. Yes there is a dinosaur farting (oh yes I laughed my ass off), yes Tim Hatch makes a perfect caveman and Jamie Morgan is quite a bad ass, yes they are all wearing flip flops and loafers, but I feel if you watch this through the lens of those 50s and 60s B-movie types that had cave people you’ll find this entertaining and have a few laughs too as I give it 2 out of 4 stars.

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Gross Movie Reviews #513

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Gross Movie Reviews #513

 

Santo vs. Frankenstein’s Daughter (DVD) – In this Santo classic Dr. Frankenstein’s daughter has continued her father’s work for decades but she is obsessed with Santo. Her obsession with the masked wrestler is she believes his blood holds the key to stay young and immortal. She is over a hundred years old and her serum is no longer effective. Her goal is to send out her minions and monster after Santo, capture him, take all his blood, and rule the world! Simple… Fun movie as they reuse the plot of “Capturing Santo’s girlfriend to lure him to doom” as I give it 2 ½ stars.

 

Santo vs. Blue Demon in Atlantis (DVD) – So there is this old Nazi scientist after WWII escapes and sets up his secret lair in the supposed Atlantis where he threatens the world. Part of old dude’s plan is to take control of Blue Demon’s mind so he can defeat Santo and the Global Agency. But as usual Santo has other plans to spoil the evil old Nazi’s plan to rule the world. Most of the movie is Santo and Blue Demon playing cat and mouse but come on that is Santo’s tag team partner he isn’t going to kill him. This might be one of the cheesier plots of the Santo films but that doesn’t mean it isn’t entertaining as hell as I give it 2 ½ stars.

 

Graverobbers (DVD) – Another late 80s odd ball horror flick that has slipped through my fingers but have finally got to sit down and watch. Now first off this isn’t the Mexican horror film of the same title that came out in 1989. Second, this one was released in 1988 and quickly disappeared into obscurity but also was released in several countries under the title ‘Dead Mate’ which makes it very possible some of you may have watched it and forgot about it? Anyhow a handsome dude named Henry floats into a diner one night and sweeps a waitress Nora off her feet during the graveyard shift. She agrees to marry him on a whim not thinking any of this is real which made me question the whole film as it seems to be filmed in Nora’s dream state kinda of thing. They travel to Henry’s mansion up north in this small town where all the important people are there and they wed that night. When Nora wakes so sees it wasn’t a dream and Henry explains to her he is this rich mortician in the small town of Newbury… get it!? With no job except bumping uglies with the handsome mortician it doesn’t take long for Nora to sneak around the mansion and spy on Henry’s work. Of course we get a lot of talk about having sex with corpses after this and the possibility the whole town might be in on it. Nora keeps investigating not believing at first but soon uncovers her new husband isn’t just cheating on her with hot looking dead women he might be eating them and burying them in the local cemetery. This film doesn’t have gore, has a weird sex thing going on, and seems to look like Nora’s dream from the beginning but never fully explaining if it is or isn’t. It is weird enough I believe horror fans may want to track this down and add it to their collection for the mere reason it was entertaining in its own way as I give it 2 ½ stars.

 

Alien Outlaw (DVD) – This low budget mid-80s film has a gunfighter named Jesse who happens to be the most talented gunfighter on the planet who does fairs and festivals. What she doesn’t know as she is dealing with her bad management problem she is about to take on quick draw alien outlaws who have crash landed on the planet. These aliens that kind of look like bad storm troopers that shopped at the used navy seal costume store are laying waste to the local folks of this southern farm community. Now it is up to Jesse to jump on a horse and go take on these aliens and show them she is the fastest gun in the universe. There really isn’t a point to the plot but wouldn’t be surprised if MST3K or Riff Trax has found this film in the past as I give it 1 ½ stars.

Occurrence at Mills Creek (DVD) – Filmmaker Don Swanson has turned his short film project into a feature length film over the past year where a young woman Clara has recently lost her family and she might be slowly going insane. With her so-called father back in her life because the recent funerals he too is dying. Clara not totally understanding what exactly is happening begins to have visits from her dead mother and sister on a regular basis. Is there something more sinister going on with Clara or is she about to pass the edge of sanity and her brain just disconnect from reality? I would like to believe the film is a slow burn or a deep dive into one young woman’s life and family. And believe Clara’s life hasn’t gone anywhere near the way she was hoping for. The film isn’t exactly horror as much as playing that line of paranormal drama that I feel can be taken several ways by different viewers which for the long term is a good thing and something film nerds should enjoy. Ava Psoras was perfect for the Clara role; the Cinematography was wonderfully done by Don Swanson, and a perk for this independent project is I believe this film can be viewed very differently by several people. They have accomplished not making your usual cookie cutout independent project but something that will stand out from most and for that I give the film 3 out of 4 stars.

Final Caller (DVD) – Todd Sheets fresh off the killer ‘Bonehill Road’ and the over the top ‘Clownado’ is back with an ultra-low budget film that involves a shock jock and his show “On Through the Night” where he tells strange stories and takes calls. For Roland the shock jock tonight seems like any other night of doing his show where he is yelling into the mic putting down his fans and spewing conspiracies. But his soon to be ex-wife shows up with the divorce papers and a caller called “The Outsider” who is going to fulfill some kind of ancient ritual by brutally murdering young women. The caller claims it is up to Roland to stop him from being a serial killer but of course Roland takes this as some kind rubbish and hangs up. This begins a hellish downward spiral for the show and all involved as “The Outsider” keeps calling back to yell back at Roland and explain how he devours his victims as he kills them and will visit Roland to complete the ritual. Roland now finds himself in world of crazy shit as he is trying to escape his own radio show and not become part of the bloody body count of “The Outsider”. This is a straight forward gore and even more extreme gore Todd Sheets project that will have his fans screaming for a sequel as I give it 3 ½ out of 4 stars.

 

Bequeathed (Vimeo) – This is a recent entry into the “48 hour film project” from Michigan filmmaker Michael McCallum whose entry is about a man named Michael North. North’s father has just died his father’s insurance broker has brought along a package for Michael. Mr. North explains he didn’t need to be a part of the funeral services or have anything to do with his father but the broker insisted in giving him this package. Michael opens it reluctantly and it’s a book. Seems simple and nice but opening it for a read might just kill Michael North. This film looks wonderfully shot and feels like an old school investment video of what a feature can be? I always find Mr. McCallum’s work to look professional and entertaining with heart behind all of his projects and this is no different as I give it 3 ½ out of 4 stars. If yinz have a chance track down this Michigan filmmaker on Facebook and other social network platforms to follow his work as you not be disappointed. Available soon at http://www.REBELPICTURES.NET

 

The Plumber (DVD) – This dramatic slow burn Australian flick from 1979 has a guy claiming to be a plumber from the university checking out unit 15C where a professor and his wife live. Max the plumber is there to inspect and fix it as he will be doing with the all the units… supposedly. Jill the wife stuck in the unit with Max day after day feels uncomfortable around him but others feel Max is fine. But day after day Max just drops by and Jill believes Max is just messing with her or stalking her for fun. Not a whole lot happens and when the climax hits it was disappointing as I only give this feature 1 star.

 

Vampires and Other Stereotypes (DVD) – I wasn’t expecting a whole lot with this early 90s film but kudos to Kevin J. Lindenmuth for some awesome effort into his first flick out of the gate. We are introduced to two guys who are not cops but two dudes that are on the city streets fighting the supernatural. While investigating a lead with a businessman at a warehouse they get trapped when a young woman who was looking for a party with her friends gets cut and bleeds. Thus her blood opens the gates of hell which happens to be this warehouse (smart low budget move Kevin) that traps them all there. Now the two supernatural hunters and party goers must survive until daybreak as demons have them trapped and will stop at nothing to chomp down on their bodies and swallow their souls. These supernatural hunters go on to fight a giant rodent, zombie heads, demons, and other creatures as they try to navigate the labyrinth of doorways trying to save the young women. There is a little uneventful twist at the end but it doesn’t take away from Lindenmuth’s excellent low budget creature filled horror effort that needs to seeked out by the independent horror nerds as I give it 3 stars.    

 

Dracula’s Widow (DVD) – This title and plot of the film screamed late 80s as Raymond Everett runs the “Hollywood House of Wax” museum that has gotten six crates delivered to him. They are going to be a part of his new Dracula attraction. Raymond believes in authentic items being placed with his wax creations. And these crates are full of various items that were shipped supposedly from Dracula’s castle in Romania. Problem he has received one extra crate but no bother as Raymond is just excited for this collection. This extra crate contains one “Mrs. Dracula or Vanessa” unaware she is a widow is hungry and sets off into the night to feed. She returns to the museum to turn Raymond into her slave so he can work and protect her during the daytime. Raymond drives around town at night so Vanessa can slaughter groups of men at will! Raymond’s psychic girlfriend doesn’t take kindly to Mrs. Dracula and teams up with this old grizzled detective who believes in vampires to stop her and save Raymond. There is a few laughs and enough gore gags that might keep you watching through the end as I give it 2 stars.

Uncle Peckerhead (DVD) – Yep, you read that title right and will make perfect sense within minutes as you view the film. Now the film does open up with the redundant “based on a true story” but quickly goes into the story of three misfits who are formed a punk band named “DUH”. Judy and band mates are about to embark on their first tour but their problem is their tour van just got repossessed. So after some searching they come across an old dude named “Peckerhead” with a van that just really wants to go along for the ride and because he explains all bands have a roadie. Judy reluctantly agrees because they need the van and they pack up and hit the road. Judy suspects something is weird and wrong with Peckerhead but cannot figure it out. But that becomes super clear after DUH’s first gig doesn’t go well and they are paid three dollars. Uncle Peckerhead goes in to take a grumpy and that is when Judy finds Peckerhead looking like a crazed flesh eating monster eating the asshole promoter. Confronted by the band they agree to get food and Peckerhead explains at midnight for 13 minutes he turns into a monster and he was just protecting his new friends. Again Judy reluctantly agrees and they continue to travel from city to city and Peckerhead just leaves a trail of bodies along the way because his monster inside him needs to feed. Everything goes well until Peckerhead saves them one night when they are being tied up by a band they are feuding with now Judy must make a decision to take the fall for the bodies the authorities are finding or be eaten by Uncle Peckerhead. This isn’t the perfect horror film but I laughed several times and enjoyed the gore as I give it 3 stars.

 

Creature with the Atom Brain (DVD) – This 1955 film has a Nazi scientist and a gangster who got deported come to America to try their experiment and exact revenge. They use freshly dead people to try their experiment on where they can control these dead folk or zombies (I don’t believe they use the phrase the whole film, I could be wrong) to kill off those they want dead. Biggest problem with the experiment is the dead bodies only last so long and supposedly bleed or secrete radiation. The cops get a scientist involved who figures out they can track the killers with Geiger counters to stop it at its source before more people die. The film has its moments but has a few dull spots in places but if you enjoy 50s sci-fi it is worth the watch or rewatch in some cases as I give it 2 stars.

 

Any comments please send to grossmoviereview@verizon.net or www.facebook.com/grossmoviereviews . Remember folks always support your local independent movie theater, independent video store, and independent filmmakers! It will keep horror alive………

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Plus you can always go to the greatest T-shirt place online or if you are in Texas visit the store of “Fast Custom Shirts” where T-shirt Joe is the only place you should purchase your horror T-shirts: Go to www.fastcustomshirts.com and support!

Todd Sheets has new film called “Final Caller” coming soon to a media platform for you!

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SYNOPSIS: For late night radio host Roland Bennett, crazy is a way of life. His show “On Through The Night” attracts the wildest, most bizarre callers of any radio show in syndication. But tonight is different. Tonight the show has truly crossed the line into Hell. Tonight a vicious killer is on the hunt for fresh blood, and he wants to make sure his favorite radio host is involved every step of the way. But simply calling in isn’t enough, and soon Roland and the staff of the radio station must face the depraved madman face to face. And because everyone thinks it’s just another radio stunt orchestrated by Roland for higher ratings, they’re on their own against this savage, blood thirsty maniac. Who will survive this night of the damned?