Gross Movie Reviews #502
Evil Seeds (DVD) – A short film from Just Buried Productions that begins on Halloween in 1981 at The McGregor’s house. But moves quickly to present day Halloween where five friends head to the woods to have some fun and tell ghost stories. When one of their stories is told it comes true so demonic pumpkin figures appear to kill the campers. This is all because McGregor hates everything Halloween which ashame in the long run but anyway give the short film 2 out of 4 stars.
Black Mama, White Mama (DVD) – This 1972 feature stars Pam Grier and Sid Haig in which two women prisoners, one black and one white hate each other. But they are forced to escape together as they are shackled together. During their daring escape they must work together and decide where they are going so they don’t get caught as both are wanted by authorities, a pimp, and hitmen. The local chief detective makes a deal with Sid Haig to track them down because he believes Haig’s character and shady friends will get the job done much quicker than his police force. One woman wants to stay and help the revolution, the other wants to leave the island with the money she believes she was always owed by her pimp to start a new life. Both are willing to do whatever it takes to get it accomplished and that means beating up a couple nuns and taking their clothes as I give this fun piece of entertainment 3 stars.
The Tallman (DVD) – So I finally watched this piece of shit that stars Jessica Biel and two genre vets in William B. Davis and Stephen McHattie. Jessica Biel’s character Julia seems innocent enough taking care of her son with nanny/random woman that stays at her house in this small community. But this community has an urban legend called “The Tall Man” that sadly is blamed for missing children over recent time in the community. After Julia is attacked and her supposed son taken things get a lot clearer… maybe? Tables get turned where Julia is the villain who steals kids and gives them to the “The Tall Man”. But two questions remain: What is the Tall Man? And why does this covert figure exist? This was just fucking dumb and an insult to Angus Scrimm and the character he made famous as I give this crap!
Spring Fever (YouTube) – A weird low budget zombie flick out of Iowa where the Mad Doctor Yeager has two of his undead minions pour some green crap into a stream near Iowa State Park. Of course this unleashes a horde of flesh-eating lunatics! Our only hope is a weird dude named Zed and his partner Agent X that may have been the stuntman for the local production of ‘Phantom of the Opera’. Along their way to find the mad doctor the two come across all kinds of characters as they try to protect the innocents as much as they can. Some fun low budget gore and a cameo appearance by Robert Z’Dar as a mob boss make the highlights of this feature. Thought it could have been edited down a few minutes but still a fun watch as I give it 2 ½ out of 4 stars.
The Norliss Tapes (YouTube) – This early 70s TV movie is about a publishing manager who becomes concern with his star author Norliss because he has become a recluse and hasn’t finished his book in the past year. The manager is also concern because they were taking a chance on this project as Norliss wanted this book to be about the occult and supernatural. Norliss in the beginning thought it was all fake until he met Ellen Cort. Mrs. Cort has an experience with her dead husband that causes Norliss to take it seriously and investigate the incident. During his adventure he finds out the dead husband wanted immortality and must fight the undead to destroy him. In the end this was just one tape and the manager has many more to go. This was supposed to be a TV series from the same person that introduced us to Kolchak but it never came to be. I love Kolchak as many do but this lacked the same charm but still a fun ride worth checking out if you haven’t before as I give it 2 ½ stars.
Killer Cup 3D (DVD) – An army of killer Styrofoam cups hit earth to drive humans into extinction. Sold! I am in to see where this funny shit takes me. What is left of the human race is trying to fight back as the story centers on this house in the middle of nowhere Canada where one-balled Uncle Zach has built the “Cup Destroyer!” It’s a RC truck that shoots lasers and one of the cups is at the wheel. But as usual the killer cups are always staying one step ahead and have stolen the piece of tinfoil to build their ultimate evil killer cup! Wonderful idea but the 100 minute running time and the communication of the cups is a dog’s squeaky toy are major drawbacks but so worth the attempt as I give this independent project 2 ½ out of 4 stars.
The Unsung (YouTube) – The latest project from Churchill Pictures is a bit of a thriller with a bit of drama and intrigue added to the mix. We are introduced to Eric through his travels of the depressed areas of Pittsburgh and his childhood flashbacks that haunt him. One day catching a nap, the nap is interrupted by a man trying to hurt a young lady. Eric jumps into action and saves her. But being homeless also she takes off with Eric’s bag and he chases her down to a homeless community under a bridge. He is accepted into the community quickly. Meanwhile we are introduced to a very driven detective by the name of Jones who understands he now is trying to track down a serial killer and how all the victims are tied into each other in some way. Eric hearing a voice from a radio decides he must take action like his comic book hero that he keeps near to his heart. Eric and the detective cross paths and Eric is of course a ‘person of interest’ in the case but no matter what both men want to save the young lady after she is taken by this killer. I tried not to give too much away with the description just because I really like the story and it isn’t your usual crime drama/thriller. The film has a lot of heart that deserves to be watched and enjoyed. It stars Jared Bajoras, Richard Billock, and Amadeo Fusca which all three were perfect in their roles for this project. Help support this project folks as I give it 4 out 4 stars all the way!
Devil Rider (YouTube) – One of those early 90s films that was a direct-to-video release which were very popular of the time. A cowboy in the old west is wandering the countryside gunning down anyone that is in his way or on his property. The marshal catches up with the outlaw and has him hung but he does not die. The cowboy claims he from hell there to kill everyone! As they leave the cowboy hanging the marshal’s posse shoots him several times but the next morning the evil outlaw disappears. Now a hundred years later the evil outlaw is back and terrorizing a group of people who came in from the big city to buy up a big farm for real estate. The outlaw can only die one way and that is by his own saber or weapon just like 1987s ‘Ghost Riders’ but the biggest difference this film had a little more effort put into it. I give this lost 90s film 2 stars.
Redcon-1 (DVD) – Another zombie flick out of the UK that has a Special Forces group briefed in a mission to go into a quarantine zone to capture a scientist Dr. Raynes. Supposedly he started this apocalyptic mess and may hold the answer of an antidote. So seek and extract him from the area… if not the area will be obliterated from the map to contain the virus. The group finds him but not without casualties and making their way to the extraction point but Raynes warns them not everything is what it seems. The zombie make-up and effects are good but the slow motion shit at times and trying to explain how the zombies are evolving so quickly to point they are UFC fighters is a bit ridiculous. The film feels like it had two different stories being told and neither was finished, just smashed together to make the mess we have as I give it 1 star.
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