Gross Movie Reviews #525

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Gross Movie Reviews #525

 

Cyberjack (VHS) – If by some chance you have not heard this 1995 Michael Dudikoff title it was also released under the title ‘Virtual Assassin’. A low budget sci-fi flick with a piss poor ‘Blade Runner’ back drop that follows Nick (Dudikoff) as an ex-cop with a gambling problem. After his partner was killed in action by a criminal named Nassim (Brion James), Nick has been having hard times now a janitor. Their paths cross as Nassim is trying to steal and upload the ultimate computer virus to his mind to control the world. Well Dudikoff just happens to be the janitor and does his best “Die Hard’ imitation to save the world as I give the flick 2 stars.

 

Better Off Zed (DVD) – Guy and Paige happen to be a cute married couple who just happen to be managing quite well during a zombie apocalypse. Their home is fenced in and safe for now as Guy is enjoying his new free time and Paige is starting to feel differently. As time goes on and Guy believing this is the best thing that could happen to them Paige begins to entertain the idea of escaping the city apocalypse life. Once Paige finds out Guy has been holding out on her about a plane dropping flyers about a safe place for humans to escape the city, the relationship breaks down. The film is more about the couple’s relationship than it is about being a hardcore zombie flick. I give it kudos for trying to be different but the ending of the film left a bad taste in my mouth as I give it 1 star.

 

Baby Frankenstein (DVD) – A mother and teenage son move into a home that has a padlocked attic. Of course the teenage son wants to know what is up there. But the real question should be if you were buying the home wouldn’t you have asked about the locked attic beforehand? Anyhow the son breaks into the attic and eventually finds a dwarf Frankenstein that he cannot wait to show off to the cute neighbor girl. After a short chase of dwarf Frankenstein the teenagers become friends with this creature and hang out or as I summarize the film as “Adventures in Baby Frankenstein-sitting”. Not even the great Andre Gower could save this boring bootleg Disney horror movie that I give a ½ star too.

 

American Beast (DVD) – James heads to the small town of Solitude after he learns his mother has died. He comes to find out he has inherit a storage locker that holds a box full newspaper clippings, a diary, and cassette tapes about a creature and a strange event, 1939 in the woods. James slowly reads more into this matter and finds himself wanting answers. Problem his James might not like the answer to why his family is all kinds of screwed up as I give the film 1 star.

 

The Last Thanksgiving (DVD) – Every Thanksgiving a good wholesome cannibal family kills every year for the holiday as its tradition. The family uses this tradition to honor a pilgrim named Abigail that they claim fed human flesh to people during the original big feast hundreds of years ago. This year the family picks a local non-busy restaurant for their holiday dinner. The only savior might be the town bitch Lisa Marie who is stuck working her shitty job on the Thanksgiving holiday. What starts off like a fun slasher film to add to the collection falls apart as the story gets dull quickly and actually annoying? Maybe my hopes were too high for a fun Thanksgiving horror movie we don’t see too often as this just didn’t trip my trigger as a horror fan and for that I can only give it 1 ½ stars.

 

Pigster (DVD) – ‘Pigster’ was the original title of the film but has been officially released under a different title ‘Feast of Fear’. A gory mess of cinema where roommates go visit a fortune teller (Robert Davi) who happens to be a collector of sorts. This collector has the young friends sign a contract that will bring their one wish true but they must pay with their flesh as a killer pig comes to collect! Yay, you figured out how to reboot ‘Wishmaster’ and offend horror fans in your version of it. Makes sense many people are not talking about this feature as it seemed buried very deep in the streaming world these days as I give it 1 star.

Wolfman’s Got Nards (DVD) – A wonderful documentary from star Andre Gower as he documents everything that went down during the 30th anniversary and celebration of ‘The Monster Squad’. A quite in-depth look into the fans of the film, the history of the bootlegs, Fred Dekker thinking it failed, and who were behind bringing the creatures to life on screen. This documentary is an absolute treat to watch as I give it 4 stars.

 

Midnight Macabre (DVD) – A horror hostess takes you through a cheap horror anthology that all three entries deal with the supernatural. None of the three stories were memorable but the film did star a bright and upcoming actress in Nadia White. I have watched several independent horror films with her over the past year and firmly believe this actress is someone horror fans should look out for when checking out the latest Indy releases… Even though I give the film a ½ star I am sure you will not be disappointed with this cool talented actress.

The Golden Age of Horror Comics I & II (YouTube) – An independent documentary created by Zane Whitener that possibly takes the deepest dive into horror comics I have ever seen. The creator spends a lot of time on the 40s and 50s horror comics because of Bill Gaines but also explains how all comics were changed forever. The creator literally reads some of the early comics in length just so you can feel the impact these writings had on kids and the government. The second half of the documentary talks more of how everything changed in the 70s after we got past the cheesy Batman show we all know and love. But the brilliance or hilarity of that original Batman show might have been the fallout of EC Comics? Zane practically touches upon almost every horror comic throughout the decades and their impact on the artists and fans alike. So if you got three hours to kill I highly recommend this well-produced documentary that not just celebrates horror comics but will teach you something also as I give it 4 stars.

 

Any comments please send to grossmoviereview@verizon.net or www.facebook.com/grossmoviereviews . Remember folks always support your local independent movie theater, independent video store, and independent filmmakers! It will keep horror alive………

You can find all of my books at www.lulu.com just search for Gross Movie Reviews or Tim Gross there!

Plus you can always go to the greatest T-shirt place online or if you are in Texas visit the store of “Fast Custom Shirts” where T-shirt Joe is the only place you should purchase your horror T-shirts: Go to www.fastcustomshirts.com and support!

You can now purchase copies of Jagoff Massacre and our new feature Blood Freak DVDs online that I co-directed with Dan Boyd at https://drunkenyinzersproductions.company.site/ !  

Horror Realm & Pop Expo – Panel/Event/Film Schedule

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Its coming sooner than you think make your plans now!

Horror Realm & Pop Expo – Panel/Event/Film Schedule

HR JUly 2015

 

 

http://www.horrorrealmcon.com

Horror Realm Con & Pop Expo

 

July 24-26, 2015

 

 

 

Panel/Event Schedule*

 

 

 

 

Friday, July 24

 

7:00 PM               Caroll Spinney

 

 

 

Saturday, July 25

 

11:00 AM             Patty Mullen

 

12:10 PM             Erin Murphy

 

1:30 PM               Daeg Faerch

 

2:45 PM               A. Michael Baldwin

 

4:00 PM               John Borowski

 

5:00 PM               Tattoo contest sponsored by Pittsburgh Tattoo Company

 

6:00 PM               Ryan Hurst

 

9:00 PM               Zombie Luau poolside pre-party

 

10:00 PM             Zombie Luau

 

12:00 AM             The Underground Party sponsored by ToeTag

 

 

 

Sunday, July 26

 

1:00 PM               Costume contest sponsored by Castle Blood

 

 

 

Film Schedule*

 

 

 

Friday, July 24

 

5:00 PM               Doom Asylum

 

7:00 PM               The Other Side

 

8:00 PM               The Monster Squad w/Andre Gower in person at The Hollywood Theater– separate admission cost

 

9:00 PM               Shivers

 

10:30 PM             The Crazies w/Lynn Lowry in person at The Hollywood Theater – separate admission cost

 

11:30 PM             Rocky Horror Picture Show with shadow cast by The Junior Chamber of Commerce Players

 

 

 

Saturday, July 25

 

8:00 AM               Classic 80’s cartoons

 

9:00 AM               Follow That Bird w/Caroll Spinney in person at The Hollywood Theater – separate admission cost

 

9:00 AM               Classic wrestling

 

11:00 AM             Super Task Force One

 

1:00 PM               Bigfoot The Movie with cast Q&A

 

3:00 PM               Jagoff Massacre with special sneak peek of Jagoff Massacre 2

 

4:15 PM               Evil in the Woods sponsored by Massacre Video

 

5:50 PM               Skinless sponsored by Dustin Mills

 

10:30 PM             H.H. Holmes with John Borowski at The Hollywood Theater in person – separate admission charge

 

 

 

Sunday, July 26

 

9:00 AM              Classic 80’s cartoons

 

10:00 AM            Classic wrestling

 

 

 

*Panels & movies are open only to convention pass holders, convention guests and vendors

 

 

 

Schedule subject to change at any time

Get your table now for this exciting convention in Pittsburgh

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Horror Realm, in association with In Person Productions, is pleased to launch Pittsburgh’s Horror Realm & Pop Expo on July 24-26, 2015 at the Crowne Plaza Pittsburgh West Green Tree.

 

The three day convention/expo brings the familiar, comfortable and affordable vibe that Horror Realm has built over the last seven years while expanding to offer guests from the pop culture arena.

 

Our March show at the new venue brought in double the attendance of previous spring shows and was the second highest attended show since we began in 2009.  We expect this upward trend to continue in July with anticipated attendance of 1,500 to 2,000 due to higher profile guests, more accessible location and more media coverage/reach.

 

The guest list is still being developed but the following have been confirmed:

  • Ryan Hurst – portrayed Harry “Opie” Winston for four years on the FX hit television series “Sons of Anarchy”.  Currently appearing on A&E’s series “Bates Motel”
  • Andre Gower – The Monster Squad
  • Erin Murphy – Bewitched
  • Lynn Lowry –The Crazies, Shivers
  • Ani-Mia – professional cosplayer and model
  • Caroll Spinney – artist and puppeteer most famous for playing Big Bird and Oscar the Grouch on Sesame Street
  • David Newell – Pittsburgh’s lovable Speedy Delivery man Mr. McFeely from Mr. Rogers’ Neighborhood

 

We are now accepting reservations for dealers.  If you wish to exhibit, please return the attached form with payment as soon as possible.  Spots will not be held without payment.  We sold out in March do expect to sell out again.

 

Please note that this is our final show of 2015.  There will not be a show in August this year.

 

If you have any questions, please contact us at info@horrorrealmcon.com.

 

Thank you for your support!